and then i sleep for like 14 hours

Describe Your OC
  • 1: their voice
  • 2: their smile
  • 3: their greatest achievement
  • 4: their insecurities
  • 5: their shortcomings
  • 6: how they deal with grief
  • 7: how they like to dress
  • 8: what they like to eat
  • 9: their theme
  • 10: their fashion sense
  • 11: their family life
  • 12: their romantic life
  • 13: their embarrassing memory from years ago
  • 14: how they react to burning their tongue on food
  • 15: how they react to a brainfreeze
  • 16: their dreams
  • 17: their ambitions
  • 18: how they sleep
  • 19: their reaction to betrayal
  • 20: their reaction to a mystery love letter
  • 21: how they react to pain
  • 22: what they're like on two hours of sleep
  • 23: how they act when they're sick
  • 24: what motivates them
  • 25: why you enjoy them
Don’t Stop Us Now

@softkent ‘s 14 Days of Love fic-a-thon, day 6: ruined surprises!

It all started because Katya decided to have mercy on Eric and let him take morning classes this semester. WGSS120 was an amazing class, Professor Atley had the coolest stories about how postwar industrialization led to compulsive female domesticity, and his seatmate wasn’t the worst thing to see at 9:30 AM every Tuesday and Thursday. He would have almost been dreamy if he had the slightest knack for small talk. As it was, Eric didn’t even have a name to go on, just intent blue eyes and an ass that even the baggiest of shorts couldn’t mask.

One day, Eric decided to drop a hospitality bomb on the guy and see if he could coax a response out of him. They were both consistently early to class, so Eric budgeted ten minutes for a brief chat before class started and turned to Cute Guy with a winning smile on his face.

“So how about that reading, huh? I thought it was fascinating how cake mix became a prestige thing- everyone in my family bakes, and I don’t think we’ve used a box mix in forty years.”

“Yeah,” the guy said, “I think it had something to do with the scientific advancements they made in food preservation for the troops. Shelf stabilization wouldn’t have been nearly as achievable in earlier years.”

Miraculously, once you got onto a clear subject, Cute Guy was actually a decent conversationalist. Eric found himself losing track of time as they dissected last night’s chapters of Marling.

“And the American National Exhibition anecdote!” he giggled. “Who can even tell the difference between Russian and American Coke?”

“I bet it’s easier with all of the Soviet Union breathing down your back. ‘Da, cola of Mother Russia is vkusno!’”

“Nice accent,” Eric told Cute Guy.

“Really? Thanks, I’ll have to tell Geno. He’s always knocking my Russian. He’s, uh, a friend of my dad’s, and we both play hockey.”

“So that’s what your weird doodles are? Hockey plays?”

“Yeah, I’m captain of the hockey team here. We’re not half bad, if I say so myself.”

“Wow,” Eric enthused, “you must be a pretty good skater, then.”

“Yeah, I guess. I could teach you sometime, if you want. I’m Jack, by the way,’ Cute Guy said.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

hi!! can you do #14? with andreil fluff? pls with minimal angst my heart cant take it lmao

#14 “This is damaging my self-esteem, I hope you know.” 


It’s been, by any estimation, a long fucking week. A game in Texas last weekend, the flight home, the long drive to Georgia, the game in Georgia, the drive back from Georgia, all in the midst of midterm exams—which meant that instead of sleeping on their flights and the bus, most of the Foxes had textbooks out.

And it’s not like they were all getting eight hours before that. Exy at dawn. Kevin’s extra practices. The gym. School, somehow. Socializing, because they’re not monks.

To top it all off, Andrew hasn’t been sleeping. He thinks Neil doesn’t notice, but how could Neil not? He sleeps in the bunk above Andrew’s, can feel it when Andrew spends the night tossing and turning instead of sleeping.

Keep reading

I heard there was a meetup thing here and since people are taking selfies, I decided to join in! I’m Cosmo/Percy/Jimmy (what even is using only one name) and I’m pan and transmasculine. I look like I’m 10 (I’m a smol one, only 14 lol) and only sleep for 2 hours a night, but I’m still cute!

Fun fact: I put on earrings for this because boys look good in earrings, it’s a scientifically proven fact~

Shout out to shitty coworkers

Okay. So. I work at a small hotel, not a chain or anything. There’s five front desk workers and three housekeepers. I work in both departments and I’ve had it. I’m done. It’s not even the customers which are sometimes interesting to deal with, it’s the pettiness between the staff that has me so stressed out it is literally causing me physical pain. Let’s start with our “marketing director”. We’ll call him W. W in all technicalities is just a front desk worker like the rest of us but for some reason can do whatever the hell he wants. He never cleans the lobby, which should be done every shift. He never does the dishes after the continental breakfast, which should be done by whoever takes down breakfast. He can just sit on his ass texting and calling with his boyfriend and doesn’t get told off for it. S is an entitled little brat. Complains that she’s the only one that does the cleaning (not true) and gossips behind everyone’s backs. A gets away with literally everything. She told the owner that she fell asleep for THREE of her eight hour overnight shift and she gets told that she’s the best? She still gets paid for it? She takes the entire eight hours for paper work that I and the other overnight person can do in like 40 minutes? She gets away with not setting up the breakfast in time and being rude to the guests? I was guaranteed 40 hours a week if I left my other job to do this one fully. I have yet to get that and I’ve been there since last august. It’s now march. I’m getting texts on my days off blaming me for shit that is not my responsibility or my fault. This week I’m getting 20 hours. The owner is making us do all this extra marketing stuff (which W should be doing but he’s too busy boinking his flight attendant boyfriend) and I’m the only one that gets told off if I don’t get finished in time. I’m the one who gets blamed for others mistakes. I get my hours cut. The owner knows all this. He knows he’s not giving me the hours I was promised. I am doing two departments, I never say no to extra shifts, I don’t even complain when I’m expecting to be on the desk and I get thrown into housekeeping for the entire day without asking me first even though it meant coming in four hours earlier than I was scheduled for and only being told 11 hours in advance. I do the website I run the social media I do the newsletters. I do my work faster than everyone else on the desk. W pins all C’s complaints on me because she’s his niece. I am so sick and tired of this. Half of my shifts I only have eight hours in between (illegal here btw. It should be a minimum of 12.) I go home so frustrated I’m close to crying. I’m so stressed about the unstable hours that it’s taking a toll on my relationship with my boyfriend and it’s not fair to him. I’m exhausted all the time because they keep having me switch between day and night shifts so now I’m up for like 48 hours at a time and when I sleep it’s either a small nap during the day or for 14 hours at a time. It’s hard on my health, both physical and mental. It’s hard on my boyfriend. It’s even harder on my wallet. I’ve been looking for other work for months and if it wasn’t for the fact that my boyfriend currently doesn’t have a job so we’re living off my pay cheques l would quit and just go on unemployment because I just can’t deal with this shit anymore.

How to spot your new Otp.

1.) Their first scene together is unforgettable 2.) They work great as a team and they support each other 3.) They protect each other at all costs 4.) There’s a height difference. 5.) They respect each other as equals 6.) They grow concern, usually the person that offers them help and asks if they’re alright. 7.) There are no gender roles, even in a heteroship, they exhibit simultaneous balance with feminininity and masculinity. 8.) They have humour too! 9.) They know something about each other that no one else knows (Not even the audience GDI) 10.) One is the brains, the other is the brawns 11.) But the brain isn’t only brains and the Brawns isn’t only muscle. 12.) Tragic background story?? Not necessary but a bonus 13.) They’ve had arguments but surpassed it. 14.) They keep things lively and interesting 15.) You’ve acknowledged the fact that you’re not sleeping a full eight hours tonight.

Originally posted by born-in-olympus

one day the Ari and Dante movie is gonna come out and I’ll be physically a mess I’ll be brought to tears in the opening scene where he wakes up to hearts alone and when he meets Dante for the first time and when I see my beautiful boy and his wonderful parents and my other beautiful boy and his beautiful parents and how everyone cares for each other and loves unconditionally and all the moments and all the tragedies and then that final drive out into the desert when ari finally does the thing and I will be alive and I will drag my future partner to go see it with me and they’ll have to sit next to this crying mess of a young adult in the theatre because mark my words I will be broken down and rebuilt again in the duration of that movie just like that first time I read the book

My sister starts studying physiotherapy next year so I’m currently compiling a list of advice, do you guys think I should add anything else? 

1.    Go to class. The fact that lectures are optional is so tempting to sleep in a little longer, but this ultimately increases the chance of you coming up with every reason under the sun to not listen to that lecture.

2.    Read everything. Emails, unit outlines, assignment tasks. Everything. Seriously dude, this will help understand what the heck you’re supposed to be doing. Thus, you’ll know what you need for classes.

3.    Hence, prepare for your classes. Need to print lectures? Do it the night before. Need to read textbooks before your class? Do that the night before too.

4.    Snack. You can eat in your lectures. To quote one of the sites I found, “Keep eating some almonds or some shit, but don’t be that bitch with the potato chips. Just don’t.”

5.    Ask questions. Whether it be other students, or lecturers, they are there to help. Or the librarians! They can help with referencing or understanding assignment tasks.

6.    Write to do lists. It feels like you have a hundred things to remember. Especially when each unit has different things you have to do each week and are 87% likely to forget. Write it down.

7.    Plan your week. First write out your class times and then plan around them. Upcoming assessment can be easy to forget about, especially if it’s only little and requires little preparation. But these are often what can change your grade from a 5 to a 6. So write them down. Then put what you have to do to make sure you get a decent grade on that assessment. Whether it be setting aside time to write an upcoming essay or 3 study sessions for an upcoming exam. This is your new bible.

8.    Start assignments early. It may not be due for another 5 weeks, but by the time it’s week 9 you’re going to be dying in a mountain of work and wishing you’d started early when you had plenty of free time to go to GOMA.

9.    Plan an outing once a week. It’s nice to have something to look forward to, without taking too much time away from study. Add this to your schedule, and if you can’t do it just make sure you have some down time.

10. Revise constantly. When the end of semester comes around and you realise you need to study 13 weeks of the semester for 4 units for 4 different exams, you’ll seriously be wishing you did little revision sessions each week.

11. Block out distractions. The app Forest is great. I use it in lectures and when studying so I’m more likely to stay focused and motivated to grow trees, download the app and you’ll see what I mean. You can get in Chrome too, which can block specific websites for the set amount of time.

12. Sleep is the best. It’s a stereotypical suggestion, but seriously 8am classes suck and only 6 hours of sleep sucks even more. Make sure you get a decent amount of sleep.

13. Coffee is expensive. Do not, I repeat, do not become dependent. But it’s a great pick me up when you don’t listen to the advice given above.

14. Eat well and exercise. This advice is just as stereotypical as the last. I follow like half of this and feel great, can only imagine how you must feel.

15. Remember why you’re studying. That’s the ultimate goal, muscle stretcher!  

Submission from: hearthawk:  You like hearing about pets? Well, I like talking about them! Here is my main babe, my cat named Kitty. She’s got the curliest belly, and the floofiest tail, and softest hair, and she’s very  tolerant of hugs. She sleeps on my chest every night, and if she doesn’t get at least 3 hours of lap time daily, she is very indignant. I have no idea how old Kitty is, but she might be 14 or 15? But I can’t imagine life without her, she she has to be immortal.

——-

i know it could be a trap but I would absolutely rub that belly every damn time she offers it.  she’s just Too Beautiful for this world??? pls give her a hug for me!

5

i can’t believe my team leader is a meme: the new series on mtv

for when you’re tired/sad/anxious
  • drink tea! green tea always seem to do the job for me. you’ll feel rejuvenated and relaxed plus, it’s healthy and rlly good for you! here are some tea facts if ya wanna know more hehe
  • take a bath. a long long loooong warm bath. bring out your bath bombs too! just relax and free yourself from all the stuff going on. you’ll feel good and energized after!
  • and before you take a bath, light up your favorite scented candle. fresh cinnamon rolls, fresh linens, or vanilla; it’s up to you! when you get out of your bath, your room will smell like your favorite scent and you’ll feel extra calm!
  • read a book. reading books is one way to escape reality! pick your all time favorite or maybe read a new book that intrigues you and let yourself get lost in in it.
  • not a reader? watch your favorite movie or tv series! most of the people I know say that Friends is the best comedy show out there. but personally, pixar/disney movies are my go to for when im feeling sad!
  • EAT EAT EAT. order yourself a whole box of pizza. maybe a box of 20 mcnuggets will do the trick! who cares how much calories are in that bowl of mac n cheese? oh you want bacon fries too? then just do it!! do it for yourself and eat your heart out til you feel okay
  • play with your pet/s! walk your dog out, get some new toys for your bunnies, feed your turtle! caring for your pets is a good way to de-stress yourself as well
  • talk it out with someone. doesn’t matter if it’s your best friend, your sibling, your parent, or your teacher; just choose someone who you trust and will listen to you! don’t hold anything back and just let it all out
  • if you don’t feel comfortable talking it out with someone then write it down. get a journal and write how your day went. in detail. write about the man you rode the train with today. describe how bright the sun shined, how strong the rain was or how beautiful this stranger’s eyes looked like in the sun. write about how you felt and why you felt that way. you’ll feel liberated after doing so.
  • if you’re not good with words, then draw it out! make a painting, a drawing, a quick sketch, heck, a doodle is fine too.
  • take a short walk! you’ll be able to sneak in a bit of exercise too!
  • drown yourself in music. get on your favorite band’s cd or your favorite playlist, turn up the volume and sing your heart out! this technique honestly works on me like magic, I feel sooo good afterwards!
  • get some sleep! take a 30 minute nap or maybe sleep for 14 hours straight! sleeping is my last resort when i’m having one of those days. maybe you’re just too caught up with everything that is happening in your life and ya need to take a quick break from all of it!
  • but most importantly, take time. don’t force yourself to be okay or happy right away. work on yourself to become the best version that you can be! :~)
Aftershocks Part 4

Pairings: Bucky x Reader

Characters: Reader, Bucky Barnes 

Warnings: Eating difficulties, PTSD, Torture, fluff

Word Count: 2254

Summary: Y/N and Bucky both have issues sleeping and get to know each other in the late hours 

Authors Note: This got a little intense in the beginning but I hope the eventual fluff makes up for it. I hope you guys like it, sorry it took so long to post, but Part 5 should follow quickly. Also, italics are either flashback/memories or internal thoughts, Cheers <3

Tags: @crapythings

Aftershocks: Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7, Part 8, Part 8b, Part 9, Part 10, Part 10b, Part 11, Part 12, Part 13, Part 14, Part 15, Post Credit Scene


The condensation sparkles as it slides down your water glass, illuminated by the glowing green light of the stove clock.

3:32.

You sit silent and unmoving in the darkness, your gaze focused on the shimmering water droplets caressing your glass, your mind separate, swimming with memories that you try to forget.

Ward screams at you, asking questions that you don’t know answers to. You feel his knuckles make contact with your cheek, the taste of rust filling your mouth. “All this because I turned you down for a date? Ward, seriously, have some pride.” You laugh as his knuckles slam into your abdomen, knocking the laugh out of your lungs. 

You regain control and spit the mix of blood and saliva pooling in your mouth straight in his face, spattering his pale skin with red. “You’re a lot tougher than I ever thought you’d be sweetheart” He kneels down, grabbing your jaw and forcing your gaze to connect with his, his eyes burning with malice, “But I will break you, I will make you burn from the inside, mark my words, I will make you suffer until I kill you myself.” 

He releases you with force, throwing you against the floor. His head cocks slightly to the guard at your cell door, never removing his malicious gaze from you, “I want her on two weeks of forced expulsion. We’ll see how eager you are to talk when you starve with a full stomach.” You roll your eyes, calling Ward on his bluff “What the fuck does that mean? I hate to tell you Ward, but ever since you became a Hydra thug, your true idiocy has become evident” The guard nods to Ward, as he smirks at you and turns to walk away, not responding to your taunt.

Your stomach growls pulling you briefly from your memories, you consider moving from your perch on the island barstool. Then the wave of nausea crashes over you. You breathe gently, regaining control. You sip your water slowly and deliberately.  

3:35.

You hear a muffled sound from down the hall, your ears perking up, head turning towards the bizarre disturbance. Your first movement in an hour causes you to feel stiff; you stifle a yawn as you slowly stretch, listening for further sounds. Yet your ears are met with none. You sigh, sinking back into the sluggish memories.

Bent double in the corner of your cell, you retch again, shaking violently as your body tries feebly, in it’s exhausted state, to rid itself of yet another meal. Your abdominal muscles scream in protest as they twist again, driving up the last bit of the meal that had been force-fed to you, followed by a heavy dosage of ipecac. 

For two weeks this had been the process. Beaten and questioned by Ward, force-fed a semblance of a meal, then an involuntary purging. Starve with a full stomach. Now you understood. This is the kind of fresh hell that only Grant Ward would be fucked up enough to think of. 

Your insides burn, the muscles exhausted from the aggressive retching movements, your esophagus raw from the burn of the bile. Is this what it feels like to be… to be broken?

A dark figure catches the corner of your eye, your breath catching sharply in your chest as the kitchen light is flicked on to reveal a disheveled looking Bucky in the doorway. His long brunette locks are tousled, sticking out in odd directions. A faint sheen of sweat glistens on his forehead. Not just his forehead, you realize, your eyes quickly drinking in his full appearance, his bare chest completely exposed, glistening with sweat, every muscle seems to shine as he steps cautiously into the light, his loose fitting sweatpants just barely hugging his hips, looking as if a single inch more would reveal his manhood. 

Your head swims as you take in his appearance. “Sorry, I didn’t know anyone was in here,” he grumbles, “would have… uh… would have grabbed a shirt” his face suddenly flushes as he takes in your expression, you gain an abrupt realization of the gape painted across your face and immediately snap your eyes away from his chest and up to his eyes… his intense, deep, blue eyes… crap. 

You look away and stare hard at the water glass in front of you. “No, I’m sorry. I couldn’t sleep. I just… I wanted…” You try to find words in your swimming head, “Water. “ you finish lamely, holding up the glass in your hand. He walks into the kitchen, making moves through the cabinets. He puts water on to boil then begins rifling through the fridge. 

You can’t help but admire the smoothness of his back, each muscle flexing as he bends up and down, squatting and searching through the shelves for something to eat. “Have you eaten?” he asks, his head still in the fridge. “What was that?” You jump, realizing that he had just asked you a question. 

He abandons his fridge pillaging to look at you. “When was the last time you ate?” “I’m not hungry” you respond, biting slightly at the corner of your bottom lip. He stares at you for a moment his eye flicking briefly toward your mouth before snapping back to your eyes. “That’s not what I asked.” He pressed sternly, as if scolding a child. “I don’t know, I can’t remember, earlier today… I’m not hungry” 

The whistle of the teakettle interrupts your weak lie, drawing his attention to the stove. You look around the room, searching for a natural excuse to exit, and yet, you don’t want to leave, not with him here. “Here” He places a mug in front of you “What is this?” you question looking at him with confusion as he goes back to his cabinet rummaging. “Tea.” He answers flatly. “Yes, I know its tea, but why… why did you? I don’t need tea.” 

He stops, smiling slightly, turning around to lean forward on the island counter, eyes on yours, causing your breath to catch in your throat. “Everybody needs tea. Tea makes you feel better. It will help you sleep, keep the nightmares away” He nods as you tentatively take a sip and he turns back to his activity on the other countertop. 

“How do you know… nightmares…” you wince slightly, your voice breaking, “how do you know I have nightmares” “Everybody has nightmares.” He says slowly, his back still to you as his hands move across the counter top. He turns around silently placing a peanut butter and jelly in front of you on a white paper towel. 

You stare at it, as he leans back against the counter top, gaging your response as he slowly drinks his own mug of tea. “Thank you” you whisper, reaching for the sandwich and tearing off a small corner before tentatively putting the little piece to your lips. “Eat slow,” he suggests, smiling a little, “it makes it easier.” 

You proceed cautiously, tearing off piece after piece, chewing slowly before forcing yourself to swallow. Bucky watches you silently; taking occasional sips of his tea. You finally finish the sandwich and take a deep breath, processing the feeling of being full and resisting the nausea that threatens you. You take your mug in your hands, turning your knees away from the island so as to look at Bucky dead on. 

He smirks slightly from behind his mug, his eyes sparkling as a strand of hair falls into them. “Feel better?” “Much. Thanks. For the sandwich, the tea… the applesauce…” You stare at him “How… how do you know? About the nightmares, the food, that applesauce would help, what’d they… what happened?” He takes a measured breath, looking down at your bare feet, before flicking his gaze back up to meet yours. “I used to work for hydra.” He answers calmly. 

You feel the heat of the mug leave your hands as your fingertips lose contact. Your head seems to swim slightly only to be steadied by the crash of the breaking china as it hits the tile floor, splashing hot tea up onto your toes. “Jesus, Y/N” Bucky exclaims as he moves to grab a towel to clean up your mess. 

You barely hear him, your heart pounding in your ears, memories of your imprisonment flashing through your head. Your main focus is on escaping, on getting away from this Hydra agent before every horror resurfaces. Your thinking is hazy as your bare feet make contact with the floor, stepping directly in the radius of the broken shards of china as you swiftly move towards the door, looking to escape, feeling the shards of the broken cup rip into the soles of your feet. 

You cry out quietly in pain as you realize the effect of your steps. “What are you… What are you doing? Y/N, your feet.” Bucky cries out in shock and concern, worry evident in his raised tone “Y/N, stop.” He moves forward, catching you around the waist with his fleshy forearm, pulling you back into him as his metal arm sweeps under your knees to lift you into a cradled position. 

You curl in on yourself, the pain of your feet breaking through the wall of shock that was pumping adrenaline through your system. You feel a twist in the pit of your stomach as if Ward’s blows were making contact once again. You whimper and try to twist out of his arms, pushing weakly against his bare chest. 

Bucky places you gently on the counter top, turning to pull a first aid kit from one of the cabinets and swiftly takes your feet into his hands. You try to yank your feet back but he holds them in place, gently, but firmly. He begins pulling bits of china out of your left foot, concentration etched on his face. “I was brainwashed. They took me. I was in the war with Steve, bout 70 or so years ago now.” 

He speaks plainly, factually, his focus centered on the task at hand. “I was lost during a mission, thought for dead. Hydra found me, they turned me into a super soldier, like Cap, but…. But worse. They brainwashed me, took everything, everything that made me feel like me… everything that made me human. I became Hydra’s trained attack dog. Steve found me about a year ago. Pulled me out of it.” 

He looks up at you, holding your now bandaged left foot gingerly in his hands, blue eyes burrowing into you; “There isn’t a day where I’m not haunted by what I’ve done. We all have our shadows, our pasts, it may be a part of who we are, but it does not define us.” He lets your foot drop and goes to work on the other one. 

You allow him to take it without resistance, noticing the warm roughness of his hands as his fingers slide over your skin.  Many seconds of silence pass as he finishes and wraps your second foot in a bandage, fingers gliding over it more gently than you could have imagined for a man of his build. He rises from his knees in front of you, eye level with you from your position atop the counter top. 

He’s very close, you think, much to close. His hips are set an inch or two in front of your split knees. If he takes a step forward he would be placed between your legs… much… to… close. “I’m sorry.” You blurt out, your face flushing as you nervously pull at the hem of your sleep shorts, painfully aware of how little they cover. “I shouldn’t have assumed, of course you wouldn’t still be involved with Hydra, I should have… I didn’t mean… I’m sorry. Bucky, I’m really sorry.” 

A small smile flashes across his face at the sound of his name. “I know, don’t worry about it.” He shrugs, looking unconcerned “it’s not the first time, not the last.” He stares at you for a minute, taking in your whole appearance, his teeth subconsciously pulling against his top lip. He moves slowly, stepping forward between your knees. A sudden rush of heat in your core alerts you to how close he actually is. 

His hands move forward to rest on your hips, just below the delicate curve of your waist. You feel the burn of your skin under his grasp. “Here, let me help you down” You nod, placing your hands on top of his shoulders, his muscles tensing under your touch. You feel the small flinch of his left arm as your pinky grazes against the scar tissue that connects his metal arm to flesh, the skin pink and puckered, and sensitive based on the reaction of the super soldier beneath your fingers. 

He slowly lifts you up off the counter and gingerly places you onto your feet, supporting most of your weight as you wince at the contact. Finally you stand erect before him, once again a foot shorter. You make a small movement to walk sideways then wince and sway before his arms wrap around your waist, steadying you on your feet. 

“Woah there, you alright?” he looks down at you, eyes full of apprehension. “Yeah, I’m good. Thank you, Bucky, for everything” and with that you dislodge yourself from his arms and begin your delicate steps towards the door. Leaving him smiling to himself in the kitchen, the sound of his name on your lips still hanging in the air.

Dialogue Prompts

1) “Have some hope.” “I don’t want false hope.” 

2) “I just wanted to go home …” 

3) “Did you break it?” “ … No.” 

4) “I baked you a cake.” “I thought that was charcoal …” “I misread the recipe a little bit.” 

5) “Hey … I missed you.” “Oh.” “Something wrong?” “I just … I didn’t miss you.” 

6) “What’s wrong?” “Nothing … I’ve just never been this happy in my life.” 

7) “I don’t want to go to the funeral.” 

8) “Come on! Only a guilty person would act like this!” “Then take a guess as to why I’m doing this!” “No … Please, no.” 

9) “I haven’t heard back from him yet.” “Do you think he’s dead?” “That seriously needs to stop being your answer to everything.” 

10) “Hi there, what can I get you, hon?” “The souls of the damned.” “Sorry, sweetheart, we’re fresh out.” 

11) “Have you ever just wanted to go outside and scream for like four hours?” 

12) “What kind of music is this?” “The tranquil sounds of murder.” “Is that a band name or … ?” 

13) “Sweetheart, go back to bed.” “There’s a monster in my closet.” “His name is Jeff, he’s nice.” 

14) “Do you need anything?” “No, I’m just going to bed early tonight.” 

15) “He left this for you.” 

16) “Are you having the nightmares again?” “Why would you think that?” “Well the screaming in your sleep was a bit of a hint.” 

17) “I know this is really out of the blue but I just wanted to be the one to call, I was working when your mom was brought in. I’m really sorry, but she passed away, we did everything we can.” “Um … I think you have the wrong number, my mom is standing right next to me.” 

18) “Hey you remember your nickname from when-” “I swear to god if you say that out loud I will murder you in your sleep tonight.” 

19) “Welcome home.” “This isn’t my home anymore.” 

20) “Did you hear that?” “I couldn’t hear anything over your ego.” 

  • Most people in the fandom: Omg I get like no sleep when skam is on, I’m too scared of missing a clip.
  • Me (yesterday): *has 14 hours sleep* wakes up at 4 before the 5 o'clock clip.
  • Me (today): *has 11 hours of sleep* wakes up at 2, 6 minutes before the new clip.

Hrm, I’ve lost a couple of followers this week (I’ve been busy and out of the house and then sick and sleeping 14 hours at a time because of being out of the house, so the last week has basically been a sinkhole in my life when it comes to time and energy, making me a bit absent here when it comes to meta and gifs and stuff…) 

And I know I have a ridiculous sense of needing to always contribute to fandom when I do loads all the time, but it still bothers me not to constantly have a Thing and recently I have not mentioned what the Thing is… 


Wait. Not that guy.

So I’d like to formally announce that around the edges of all the drama of last week, all waking hours of my life has been all about the Terrible Coffee AU, of which this is the current last line, and word count:

And that’s all I’ll say about it for now ;)

Please read this. It’s important to me. It’s about my ex Jana. She committed suicide.

One of her friends contacted me. I was sent the news just a few hours ago that my she overdosed and died in her sleep. I don’t think she wanted that to happen. It was an accident and she didn’t mean to. She wasn’t paying attention to her prescriptions and took more than what was needed.

I’ll disclose everything so that everyone understands the situation. I already feel like I just killed her and my guilt at this point will be a crutch on me for the rest of my life.

She was 14 when I met her in 2010. I was an artist in deviantart. I was 22. I was too old for her. But I cradled her and became her friend because she had none, and soon after that, alarming realities came to light. She wanted to isolate me and only to function for her. In a way she became successful. She was extremely dysfuctional. My deviantart got shut down by her hand, and I was angry. I said things to her that I shouldn’t have. Things, that were enough to psychologically scar her for 10 lifetimes. I was abusive to her. I owe her that to tell everyone here that I was horrible to her by the time that friendship ended. And I hid. I left quietly.

She showed herself to me again on September of 2015. She had been there watching me for sometime already before that. I felt remorse after all that had happened. At this time she was surrounded with friends who had already led her into a hedonistic lifestyle. I didn’t want that for her. But she had already become like them, and it was dangerous. I took it upon myself again to take her in, but she was already of age this time and I became her lover. The problem was I was on the other side of the world and there was but a slim chance that this would work. She still wasn’t happy. She still remained problematic with all her relationships. I promised her the opposite of all that. I promised her a home here but she was too afraid to take that risk. She cheated. I took her back in. I still believed something could be worked out. Everything started to fall apart after that. With the little money I had I was prepared to take here in and have her surrounded by an actual good family, and I spent it. Then, she found work and met Alex, and all that I saved for nearly 20 years went down the toilet. Everything here that I’ve expressed about her with all my anger and hatred was because of that, and that for the entire duration she was abusive towards me, just like I was to her when she was 14.

I was bitter, I still am. I’m angry that it had to be like this. I’m angry that Alex just wanted to fuck her and didn’t even wait for the aftermath to cool down first before he took her. And he dared to come at me saying I only saw Jana at face value. I’m angry at myself and I feel like I’m a murderer for this. I’m angry that I was awful to her to begin with when she was a kid.

You’re all free to judge me for this. I don’t forgive myself at all. There are too many other things to say about this but I’ll leave it here. Jana just wanted to be happy. She made choices, many impulsive ones that led to this. Her death isn’t my responsibility but in my heart I feel that it is. As for her friends, and Alex, they can all go to hell for feeding on her desperate need for love and affection and taking advantage of that.

i’ll be in the process of taking everything here that I’ve said regarding my past relationship with her down. With the twisted way she saw the world and people I knew she was never going to be happy in any situation. Had it been with anyone else it would’ve ended just the same. It’s pointless for me to still keep my hate for her and what had happened in my heart because it’s just now full of regret. She’s gone. She just wanted her pain to end. I couldn’t love her enough to end it because it would’ve always been constant. If that fucker Alex knew that he would’ve fought harder before she took those goddamn pills.

………god damn it, Jana.

I am having a sleep over! Send in any question and as many as you would like

1. Secret
2. favorite song
3. first crush
4. embarrassing experience
5. a random confession
6. what was my first… (then you ask me what my first ___ was)
7. have you ever done something possibly illegal
8. single or taken
9. been bullied
10. 3 things i would change about myself
11. favorite part of my body
12. what is one wish i have had
13. funniest memory
14. pets
15. turn ons
16. turn offs
17. height
18. sexual orientation
19. where were you 3 hours ago
20. worst habit
21. talents
22. hobbies
23. where would you travel to
24. what languages do you speak
25. ask me a random school test question (ANYTHING
26. ask me a dirty question (ANYTHING)
27. 3 fears
28. zodiac sign
29. 3 things that make me happy
30. 3 things that upset me
31. 3 things that annoy me
32. a random dream that i had
32. where and how do i want to die
33. what color ____ (bra, underwear, shirt, pants, socks) am i wearing right now
34. my relationship with my family
35. a quote that i always say
36. something that made me laugh today
37. what is my IQ
38. ANY personal question
39. give me two things to choose from and i will choose which one i prefer
40. any questions you like

~Admin Lizzie