Even Bech Nӕsheim. Oh, fuck you, I’m already crying. Okay. Stop looking at me like that and let me talk. You are… the best thing in my life. You have taught me so much. You have given me the love that I never expected, the love that I didn’t think I’d ever find, and you have shown me how to love someone back. And in this minute, in this universe and in every parallel one, I am fucking in love with you, because you are the only person who can make me laugh and make me cry, and you are the only person who loves me and understands me and supports me and you are the fucking man of my life, goddamn it, and I’ve known that ever since I was seventeen and you kissed me in some random stranger’s pool. You’ve changed my entire life. You have made me happier than I’ve ever been, sadder than I’ve ever been, angrier than I’ve ever been, and you have made me a better person. I love you more than anything I’ve ever known. And, yeah, in this minute, we’re getting fucking married. So. For better or for worse, in sickness and in health, I love you, Even Bech Nӕsheim, and I always will. Fuck. Oh, shit. Everybody, I’m sorry for swearing so much, and also for crying. Okay. Your turn.
Isak Valtersen. Out of all the movies I’ve made you watch, and all the ones that exist, our love story is the most beautiful that I’ve ever known. You always say that love at first sight is bullshit, but I saw you on the first day of school and just knew that we’d be here one day. Getting married in front of our families and friends. In tuxes - and, might I add, you look really fucking hot right now. Sorry. That made you laugh, though, so I regret nothing. But I have loved you for my entire life, and everything fell into place when I saw you, like all the parallel universes lined up in that minute. I loved you when I didn’t know you existed, I loved you from across the courtyard at Nissen, and smoking weed on my windowsill, and with pink streaks on your face, and snapbacks and omelettes and cabin trips and morning breath and everything you’ve done, everything you’ll do. I am so, so proud of you. I am proud to know you. I am proud to love you. And I will remind you of that every single day for the rest of our lives. You mean everything to me. Thank you. I love you. And I can’t wait to call you my husband.