and then bones is just grumpy grumpy grumpy

anonymous asked:

Replying back. What you just said about Rey wanting Han/Father Figure back, and Grumpy Old Man Luke turning out to be her Father. It reminds me of Luke wanted Obi-Wan/Father Figure back, and Grumpy Old Man Vader turned out to be his Father. Really the parallels between Anakin/Luke/Obi-Wan, and Luke/Rey/Han are there. Plus RJ said Rey&Kylo are light&dark, well look at what Luke&Leia is wearing in TLJ. Luke&Leia's light&dark clothes matches Rey&Kylo's light&dark clothes.

Ding ding! I think we have a winner! 

Five Minute Ficlet (the was-supposed-to-happen-on-my-coffee-break-that-didn’t-happen-edition)

It’s a long title…And I might just be taking some aggression out by writing this.

You threw yourself down in the squashiest chair in the lounge, and wiggled around until you were comfortable. You got yourself settled in just the right position, with your knees propped up and your PADD in your lap. When you were sure no one could see anything but you on your PADD, you pulled the paperback novel out from under it. It had been in the box of books you’d found on shore leave, and it was so ridiculous and cheesy that you knew as soon as you’d seen the title that you had to read it. But you also didn’t want to get caught. It had been a challenge to find somewhere comfortable enough to sit and read, let alone private enough that you might not get caught with a lurid romance novel. The lounge off of the officer’s mess was the best place you’d found. It was nearly always empty, and had the most comfortable chairs on the ship.

It had been a hellaciously long day, and you just wanted to lose yourself to the pulp fiction in your hands. You’d picked up new MedBay crew after leave, and one of the nurses was just not getting the swing of things. She was slow. Slow with assessments, slow with treatments, slow with medications. Slow. So slow, in fact, that you’d reported off to both Christine Chapel and Doctor McCoy about your concerns. Her fitness to practice was questionable. At the end of the shift, you had a headache that was centred right between your eyes. It was either get blind drunk to forget or lose yourself in your book. The book won. You were on Alpha, with your orientee again, in the morning. A hangover would not do.

You were only a few chapters in, and it didn’t take long before you got lost in the ridiculous premise and started giggling. The doctor was such a stereotype, bossy, grumpy, distant. The nurse in the book was an even worse stereotype and part of you was aching to research scope of practice for nurses in the twentieth century because she didn’t seem to be doing much other than following the doctor around and being irritating. When she couldn’t take a blood pressure manually, you scoffed and chucked the book across the room in disgust. Just as you threw it, Doctor McCoy entered the lounge and you just barely missed clipping him with your throw. He ducked and then bent down to grab the book.

“Oh, don’t. I’m so sorry, Bones. But just,” you paused. “Back away from the book.”

He arched an eyebrow and shook his head slightly as he picked it up. “Rx: Romance, STAT? Why do I think this is going to be even better that the space stud book you were reading last week?” He chuckled. You felt your cheeks heating as he flipped the book to read the back cover. “Lacey Donovan was down on her luck when she accepted the position in Doctor Mac Calvin’s clinic. The doctor was a grumpy curmudgeon who tried to make her life a nightmare, but when tragedy strikes their town, they have to work together to save lives. And Lacey learns that his hard heart is because of his own tragedy. Will she ever be able to break through his shell? Will she be able to cure his pain with a little prescription for romance? Good god, woman, this sounds like tripe!”

“It’s pretty ridiculous,” you admit. Bones flipped through quickly.

“Where’s the sex?” He asked.

“My understanding is that this particular publishing house didn’t do explicit sex scenes, just implied ones,” you explained. He rolled his eyes, and looked back in the book.

“Oh, here we go. Then their eyes met, and Lacey knew she wouldn’t be sleeping tonight. He kissed her. Insistently. And she thought he might not be such a grump after all,” he read. “Are you actually enjoying this?”

“I’m wondering how she could possibly be attracted to the grumpy doctor,” you admitted.

“You don’t think grumpy men can be attractive?” He countered. “Maybe he’s grumpy with a heart of gold.”

“Dry, sarcastic and generally fed up with shenanigans, with a touch of sexy curmudgeon? That’s attractive. Grumpy and berating his nurses the first three chapters? That’s not attractive,” you shrugged. He raised an eyebrow.

“You say that like you might have experience with the first.” He looked expectantly at you.

“You might say my work environment has some perks. Sexy curmudgeons are still sexy,” you smiled.

“We should continue this conversation over a drink sometime. Maybe form a book club?” He suggested with a wink.

“Is that an Rx for R and R, Doctor McCoy?” You teased.

“Might be more enjoyable than a stat order for romance. I’m more of a foreplay man, myself.”

anonymous asked:

Mckirk au where their personalities are swapped (like a transporter malfunction causes Jim to be grumpy and Bones to constantly smile and try to woo the whole crew?)

  • The moment Bones wakes up with a good mood, he instantly knows something is off. Because really, Bones isn’t a morning person and he knows it. He never wakes up rested, but somehow he’s completely fine. So he turns to his side and brushes his lips over Jim’s cheek. “Morning,” he says softly, and Jim replies mostly with a grunt. “We’ve got a few minutes to spare, why don’t we make use of that?” he continues, voice low and soft in Jim’s ear. Jim slowly turns around, and he looks exhausted. Like his mind’s still on a different planet. Definitely not awake. “I’m tired,” Jim states simply, and Bones swings his leg over Jim’s hips, straddling his lap with a small smirk. “No worries, I’ll wake you up just fine.”
  • But that only does miracles for Jim’s mood for an hour or so. By the time he’s sitting in his captain’s chair, Jim’s mood is back to just being sour. “Federation requires us to send an away party to this Class M planet to retrieve an artifact,” Chekov says, looking at the planet in front of them through the big window. “The Federation can kiss my-” “Captain?” Spock asks, looking at him curiously, “our doctor has already offered to join the ground party.” “Of course he has,” Jim says, rubbing his temples. “Are you alright?” Uhura asks. “Fine,” Jim replies.
  • And a grumpy Jim might just be uncomfortable and unusual, but absolutely terrifying is an excited Bones. Because Bones can be flirty, sure, but mostly only to Jim or when he desperately needs something from one of the crew (– and then only when scare tactics don’t work). Uhura is a little uncomfortable when she sits down on a bio bed, and Bones throws her a big smile. “How can I help you today, darlin’?” 
  • “Jim, is something wrong with Leonard?” she asks, and Jim shrugs. “Besides a permanent bad mood? How long you got?” He replies, and Uhura’s not quite sure how much of that is just grumpy sarcasm. “You two spend too much time together, you;re starting to look alike.”
  • Usually, it’s Bones who starts their bickering. But this time, it’s Bones who pats Jim’s shoulder and throws him a smile. “Let’s go beam down, shall we?” “Sending down a CMO and a Captain sounds like the stupidest idea,” Jim says, “literally doesn’t make sense when we have that many crew members aboard who are actually trained-” “It’ll be fun, c'mon!” Bones says, throwing him a lopsided smirk. He is far too happy to step on to that transporter and beam down, and Jim follows through gritted teeth.
  • Bones gets hurt, though not majorly so, and it’s really from jumping headfirst into danger. Jim yells at him for it pretty much all the way back to medbay, where he watches Bones messily fix himself up. “Are you insane? Jumping into danger like that, it’s like you’re purposely trying to rile me up.” And Bones shoots Jim a glance, because both of them start realize these roles should be reversed, and Bones frowns. “Something’s wrong.” “Yes. Your arm, for starters,” Jim points out, and Bones rolls his eyes. “C'mon, darlin’, let’s go find out what’s wrong.”
  • “Am I really this grumpy all the time?” Bones asks, nudging Jim’s side gently. Jim’s crossed his arms, frown permanent on his face. “I’m not grumpy,” he says, “I am merely annoyed at your recklessness, and the incompetence of some crew members- really, Scotty, how the Hell did you even manage to make the transporter malfunction to the point that we’re basically swapped?” Scotty raises an eyebrow at his captain. “First of all, you’re insufferable with the doctor’s personality,” Scotty starts, but Bones raises his hand and steps in between the two of them. “Just get this fixed.” “Aye, alright. Just get James Tiberius Grumpy-pants out of my office,” Scotty says, and Bones drags him out with a grin.
  • “Why are you so grumpy all the time?” Jim asks later. They’re back to their old selves, though Leonard still seems to be in a decent mood. Though, sex will do that most of the time. They’re in bed and they’re comfortable, and Jim’s lying on his side to watch the other man with his usual interest. Bones simply shrugs. “Mostly because you’re being an idiot and I worry over you and the rest of the crew. You just make such stupid, rash decisions, and-” “And I’m tuning out now before you get more insulting,” Jim laughs, sliding an arm around Bones’ shoulder, and he pulls him in closer. “I missed you being grumpy at me, old man.” But for saying that, Jim definitely did not miss getting hypo’d in the neck by his grumpy doctor.