- Me, a humble fic farmer, tending her plot of land: neighbor john said there was a shipwar starting just over the hills. what do you think Ma, do you think we'll ever see a shipwar?
- Ma, clutching her apron to her chest: oh dear, I hope not!
- Pa, sitting in his rocking chair and smoking his pipe: hmph! there's always been shipwars and there will always be shipwars. you just keep your nose out of it and mind your own business. we ain't got no business messing around in shipwars. now step to it! i want that field of headcanons and plot twists plowed by morning! and keep those plot bunnies from getting at the smut, we can't afford anymore WIPs!
I work at a fast food restaurant and almost daily I get a customer tell me they want "whatever is on the sign out here" and when I explain to them I can't see what's out there in the sign from inside the restaurant, they always get super shitty about it