* I knew the second Cheryl gave Veronica the Vixens she’d commit suicide. Anyone seen 13 reasons why? The first sign of suicide: Giving away things that you love
* I was ready to tear Archie into shreds but nope, came out he just wanted to be Veronica’s soul mate. You are, Archiekins
* Ronnie ships Bughead, guys
* I hate Hermione Lodge and Penelope Blossom. Worst parents of the year award goes to them
* On the other hand, FP wins best parent of the year award. He gave Jug Hot Dog and made sure he wasn’t alone. I want him out of jail NOW
* Have y'all seen how vulnerable Alice looked when she told Betty about her son? No makeup, no fancy clothes. Just her. I love her.
* I’m not the biggest fan of Ronnie but I like how she took care of Cheryl and tried to befriend Jug
* Josie is a good person. I like her. And looking at her parents, I understand why she’s a bitch sometimes
* I want Cheryl to leave her mom and move in with Ronnie. Then I want Ronnie to bitch slap her mom for being a heartless whore
* 10 bucks it was someone hired by the Sheriff or the mayor to hang that shit up on Betty’s locker
* Another 10 bucks it was someone hired by Hirem to kill Fred
* I need a gazillion gifs of that love reveal and another gazillion gifs of that make out session. I knew Jug wasn’t awkward during sex. He’s a fucking man
* Btw can I have a copy of Jug on my front door? He’s so fucking hot
* I like Varchie but tbh I screamed all the time to get back to Bughead. That shit was hot and I was surprised they’d go all the way THAT fast
* Btw Kudos to Betty for that speech. And of course the love of her life was the first one to applaud
* Betty stop worrying about Jug being a Serpent now. They proved time and time again that they’re loyal and good people. I mean, have you seen the kids laughing with Jug? They’re cool. Also, now you have a hot biker gang boyfriend who punches assholes who dishonor you (I’m jealous)
* Did anyone get a glimpse on Hot Dog? He looked like a Lab or a Goldie but FINALLY HOT DOG
* I need Archie’s song as MP3
Summary: TOO MANY FEELINGS I WON’T SURVIVE THE HIATUS UNTIL SEASON 2!
Did I mention Jughead Jones was so fucking hot this episode?