and the troll train trolls again

Davekat is killing me

akjfdhakfh dave and karkat watching a troll romcom and dave is like what the fUCK when the two dudes suddenly start kissing, what the fuck, they’re buddies? because no matter how much tension dudes may have in a human movie, they never ever hook up. he’d thought watching a romcom was gay, but this is getting way gayer than he’d been prepared for..!

Karkat doesn’t get his problem at all, of course. “their relationship has been built up properly, Dave. it’s been a long time coming. don’t you see how well they complement each other? but how similar they are nonetheless? how much they make each other better? do you know nothing about structure and character?”

after a while, a long while, Dave agrees to watch a romcom again and hey, it turns out most troll romcoms have dude relationships in them, huh……. he talks over the romantic scenes, at first. when Handsome Troll A and Handsome Troll B start smiling at each other and A touches B’s hand reverently and COMPLIMENTS THE GUY ON HIS EYES, Dave is like “oh wow, here we go. those two are gonna do the whole buttsex train. Karkat, no way this isn’t at least a tiny bit weird to you? of course we’d get stuck with homicidal bisexual aliens”

he gets used to it, gradually. two men can look into each other’s eyes and it can be romantic, who would have thought. it doesn’t even make them useless in a fight or anything, weird…

aliens are so alien.

but it becomes so normal, then. he reads one of his old pesterlogs, two years into their journey through space, and it’s so cringy. he couldn’t stop talking about how gay everything was, could he? man…

three years into it, almost at the end, he kisses Karkat and they both agree that it’s been a long time coming and they laugh about how often they’ve thought one of them would make the first move and they both chickened out. and those are the only thoughts he has. no “this is weird”.

just “finally”

anonymous asked:

I have so many questions about Padawan Yan I had to create a memo! It's just so, I love it! So, we saw little of Obi-wan and Anakin's reactions to their stowaway. Did they know who he was when they found him? Otherwise how did they find out? What were they doing on planet? Were they alone or with their troopers? This is my new favorite AU!

“I still can’t believe you realized he was the Count.” Anakin shook his head, resting on his back on the heated tiles as he stared up at his master.

Obi-Wan rolled his eyes and continued stretching slowly. “I HAVE seen holos of him as a younglings you know, and I made a point of examining Yan Dooku’s entire carrier from the moment he was given to the Jedi to current date when I knew he was our enemy.” He sighed. “Are you going to just lay there?”

“Don’t feel like swimming. Just didn’t want to be alone that’s all. And Ahsoka said if I bothered her while doing girly things she would put sand in my boots.”

Snorting sharply, Obi-Wan sent the other an amused grin. “You know when she said she was doing girly things, she meant she was going to be speeder racing with some of the clones, right? And Barris if she can convince her.”

That got the blond to sit up and blink at him. “You’re joking.”

“Nope, she’s been doing it for a while now.”

“…That little sneak…”

Shaking his head in amusement, Obi-Wan slid into the pool and let himself get used to the heated water. “She does learn from her master.” He teased before throwing himself forward into the water and swam, eager for the exercise and hot water for his muscles.

Anakin grumbled and sat up, watching the other spear through the water, a reluctant smile twitching his lips as he watched the other move, the sensation coming from Obi-Wan telling him that he was actually relaxing even if he was exercising at the same time.

It was pleasant, Obi-Wan didn’t have time to relax often, none of them had really but Obi-Wan even less as he ran the battlefields almost alone, running an army without letting himself tire and letting himself be pulled down. ‘Without Dooku though…how does the Separatist fare…’ He frowned a bit to himself.

They had leadership outside of Dooku of course but Dooku, Ventress and Grievous were the ones who ran the ‘army’. Without the army…

He rubbed his chin slowly.

“Deep in thought you look.” Anakin looked up in surprise, getting to his feet and bowing to Yoda who had Yan by his side.

“Grandmaster. Kind of, I was thinking of the war.” The blond offered honestly before glancing at Yan who peered back curiously.

“Hmm yes. Briefed Yan I have though a problem arisen has. To old for a padawan I am, another master Yan now needs as he will not be returning to his adult self except for normal aging.” Yoda gave Yan a small smile that got a big one in return.

Anakin blinked at the smile. ‘He’s so…different.’ He noted, now that Yan was feeling safe and relaxed that he smiled just like any padawan, just like Ahsoka. “A new master?”

“Hoping I was that willing Master Kenobi was to take over.” Yoda chuckled. “Trust him to both train Yan well and treat him right I do.” He added the last part a bit quieter and Anakin winced, rubbing the back of his neck a bit.

Yeah he could imagine that Yan was perhaps having a bit of trouble in the temple with people treating him like the enemy, especially younger padawans.

He didn’t like the idea of being replaced as Obi-Wan’s padawan but… well Anakin had Ahsoka, training Ahsoka had been a delight and an utter privilege.

To deny Obi-Wan the chance to experience that again…even if it was Dooku.

“Well he should be done swimming soon or we could interrupt him if you wish Master Yoda.”

“Wait we can, patience we will lubricate ourselves with.”

Yan blinked and looked down at the old troll while Anakin turned faintly green. “…Master that was a horrible choice of words.”

Yoda smirked at them.

‘Evil old troll.’

Clearing the Mines pt.2

(Here is part one for those who missed it!)

The members of House Reinhardt found themselves back at Snapdragon Mines once again, a few new faces and a few old, luckily they knew what they were in for, or so they thought. The trolls that dwelled within the mines were trapped from their first attempt at clearing them, but last time they were sorely out numbered and unprepared for what they found, the tribe of trolls consisted of well over a hundred and in the dark, they stood no chance. But now they knew, they had a few weaknesses that they discovered and best of all they were trapped in the back of the mines. It’d be easy enough to eradicate them, no?

The group moved through the already cleared part of the mines, still weary just in case any Trolls managed to escape. But all was silent and calm luckily. Two men, dressed in white and silver armor, garbed in the Lilydale’s Enforcement tabard stood guard at the two barricaded entrances. Saluting the group as they approached. They informed the group of a few encounters in which the Trolls attempted to break through the barricade, but ultimately failed. The tunnels had been quiet for most of the day according to the guards. The Countess was asked to stay back while she commanded them to remove the barriers that separated them from the Trolls below. Miersae watched, as those present worked together, lifting and clearing the entrances, she was so proud of how far they’ve come. A group that once was just a bunch of broke, but good-hearted individuals was growing into something far bigger and better than they likely could have imagined. This was the beginning of them ascending to being that pillar of hope for the innocent.

Originally posted by 3prinz

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What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you unsealed bitch?

I’ll have you know I am a competent, self-taught seamstress, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on cosplay gatherings, and I have over 300 confirmed costumes. I am trained in horn making warfare and I’m the the ~*most canon*~ cosplayer in the Homestuck fandom. You are nothing to me but just another wigless pleb. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this “you only get notes if you’re pretty” website, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of Big Name Fans across the WORLD, and your convention lineup is being traced right now so you better prepare for the blotchily painted troll shirts, maggot. The shirts that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can offer you constructive cosplay criticism in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my keyboard. Not only am I extensively trained in both troll and Beta Kid cosplay, but I have access to the entire arsenal of MS Paint Adventures characters and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the con floor, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” hate was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will spray Ben Nye Final Seal all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo.

Moftiss + Trolling = TJLC (TEH Edition)

I am watching BBC's Sherlock with my roommate and last night she saw “The Empty Hearse” for the first time. My fourth time watching it, I realized Mark Gatiss is wholeheartedly trolling TJLC-ers in this episode. After watching this episode, my roommate is sold on TJLC. It is likely many of these ideas have been noted and expounded upon by those higher up in the fandom than myself, but I must write! Below, each troll trope is outlined and explicated. 

1. Dismissed as Fantasy

Moftiss can deny all they like, but they know which ships are the most prevalent through the fandom. Shipping main characters together is something TV narratives drive–who will end up with whom? Gatiss recognized this and put it in the episode. 

Sherlolly (x)

Molly is undoubtedly the person Sherlock trusts the most. At the show’s inception, he mostly used her attraction to him to get what he needed–whether access to the lab or access to a body. They have a very strong relationship which evolves throughout the show’s run. However, this is not romantic, as much as Molly wishes it were. 

This kiss is not real. It is not canon. This happens inside Anderson’s head. Anderson sees Sherlock as some James Bond-type action hero, which is not far off. Check out LSiT’s M-Theory, and I agree Sherlock may have worked for MI-6. Allow me to repeat, this kiss is not real.

Sheriarty (x)

Moriarty scares the shit out of Sherlock. Prior to the end of HLV, the only remnants of Moriarty are chained by the neck at the bottom of Sherlock’s mind palace. This kiss is not real. It is a product of Laura’s imagination. He is frightened of Moriarty and that does not make a good foundation for any relationship outside “arch enemy." 

This is important because these kisses did not occur in canon and they were dismissed as fantasy. That’s all they are, and neither of these romances will come to fruition on the show. This is pivotal because Johnlock was not included. Sherlock and John are not a joke, they are not a fantasy, and their romantic relationship is and will be the crux of the show. 

Don’t believe me? How about one more from a different episode? 


Literally dismissed. This is a shot of Mark Gatiss as Mycroft literally dismissing Lestrade. This is his cheeky way of saying, "It’s not going to happen.” I ship Mystrade, but recognize the narrative is carrying us toward Lestrade x Molly. While not dismissed as fantasy, it is dismissed and adds evidence to support my contention. 

2. Playing with “the Heart" 

The heart is a symbol of romance. There are a couple times in "The Empty Hearse” which reference the heart. 

First, when Mycroft fails to successfully perform the “heart” operation in the game “Operation." 

Sherlock says it for me. (x) Mycroft says he isn’t lonely and lives in a world of goldfish. Eventually, perhaps Mycroft will find himself a goldfish. It matters little, what matters is that Gatiss is screwing with the heart metaphor.

What else can I do to prove he’s trolling? He inserted himself into the episode and has the character playing with someone’s heart in a literal sense. Fucking troll, I am slowly losing my ability to coherently express my point. 

Another example you ask? Well, this is one everyone noticed. 

Do you see it? Perhaps not. 

Alright, now look again. 

That’s right. The bomb inside the train car is built and colour-coded like an anatomical heart. Two hearts, each side with two atriums and two ventricles. Sherlock is staring and fussing over two hearts–one on his side and the other on John’s. Does Sherlock diffuse the bomb? Does he diffuse the tension between himself and John? 

Of course not! There’s an off switch. There’s always an off switch. He stalls the bomb like he stalls all the things he and John must discuss. 

What’s that you say? 
"Proof, Audrey! We need more proof!" 

Ask and ye shall receive. 

That mother fucker. Mark Gatiss. Perhaps you don’t recognize this. It’s the time at which Sherlock stopped the bomb. One minute and twenty-nine seconds to go. Why stop it there? There are 88 potential stopping points more climactic than this one. 

John and Sherlock met for the first time on January 29th. The anniversary of their meeting is replicated on the timer for the bomb representing the union of two hearts. 

In summation, Mark Gatiss spent a significant amount of time trolling not only the fandom, but Johnlock hopefuls in "The Empty Hearse.”

As always, thank you for reading. I’m off to get myself a sandwich and some caffeine after this meta. Criticisms and critiques are always welcome. Ask box is always open. 

training hard or hardly training?

Running her hands in her freashly cut hair Sarah was ready to do more training. Now that she was fighting more her hair was just to long to do anything with. That and it had been a reminder of when she got her wings cut off… so it was finally time to change! Picking up her phone she started to text her teacher. It was at a time that she had no classes going on. But the small troll still needed to stop at the shop anyways for a bit.

[text] hey! I was wondering if you would be down for more training later today.

[text] i am ready to fight again

[text] been working on getting over my problem i have to!

anonymous asked:

Tell me a story

The first time Tracy had met Dave, was at her sisters party. They’d hidden all the expensive items, filled their arms with porcelain decorations and stowed them safely in cupboards and drawers. Tracy had taken her mum’s favourite mug and carried it to her room, hiding it in her sock draw. She wanted to be extra safe. Just in case the party got out of control just like Alicia’s parties always did. 

As she finished getting ready there was a knock on the door and Jeremy, Tracy’s boyfriend walked inside. He gave her a kiss, complimented her curly hair, decorated with colourful hair clips. She said his leather duster looked nice. 

Thirty minutes later, the party was in full swing and people were still arriving. Jeremy had left early, he wasn’t a fan of people. “I don’t like people I don’t know,” he would whinge. “You’ll never like anyone then.” Tracy had countered but as always, Jeremy did as he wanted. It made her think back to a few months ago when they’d broken up. Tracy had begged for him to come back but when he did, it had never been the same. It had been like an opening door and she’d begun to see the things she’d missed when she was blinded by love. 

Alicia came charging into the room like a tornado heading straight for her sister. “Plum!” She yelled, using her nickname. “They’re here. Alicia was red in the cheeks, her eyes wide and she looked overjoyed. “Who?” Tracy asked. Peering behind. “The navy boys.” She squealed. 

That was when they entered the room. The first one was short, his nose was large, his eyes a bright blue. He was handsome but it was the second man that stole Tracy’s breath away. He was tall and lean. His brown hair was curly. His eyes were blue with a dark ring round them and they looked right at her. 

Alicia waved them over. Her eyes now darting between Tracy and the man with a knowing smile. Now that he stood closer, the man was much taller in person. “This is Lee,” Alicia gestured to the short man. “And this is David.” 

Alicia and Lee jumped into conversation and Tracy finally managed to look away from David and down to her toes instead. 

“Hi…” He said. His cheeks turning read. 

Tracy looked up at him again and couldn’t help but smile. Then her eyes found the a bit of ink on his leg. She cocked her head to the side and looked at the image there. A laugh escaped her lips. “That’s a bloody ugly.”

David started laughing, the kind that caused a train reaction. “My mates dared me…I kind of hoped trolls would pick up girls.”  

They both looked down at the freshly tattooed troll which held a club in it’s hand and wore just a scrap of material. Then the conversation steered into David’s other tattoo, dedicated to his mum on his arm. Then they talked about families. Eventually Jeremy came into the conversation and at the end of the night, they went their seperate ways. David didn’t cross the lines and Tracy who thought of him often still tried her hardest with Jeremy. 

Little did Tracy and David know that in just 10 months time when Tracy broke up with Jeremy that two days later, David showed up at her door, a ring in hand and asked Tracy to marry her. “I always knew,” He had said, “From the first time you’d called my tattoo ugly.” She said yes, of course. Then they had four children, adopted one and lived happily ever after. 

That’s the story of my parents. 

aerobaticfallacy  asked:

"I get the feeling this train's n<>t, starting again any time s<><>n" The troll beside you finally speaks, black eyes looking bored out the window. The coastal train had broken down hours ago and although the speaker kept assuring the restless passengers that they would be on their way any time not, their promises were wearing thin.

Eridana blinked at the strange looking fellow, thinking indignantly of how she should have her own row, or at least a window seat. However, she didn’t hold that against this troll. She simply nodded and said “folks are probably gonna go nuts before long” There were many tapping feet and impatient coughs throughout the cabin, and more than one low growl.

anonymous asked:

Headcanon where the King and Queen--knowing magical trolls who will perform magical services for them for relatively cheap--ask for one of the trolls to train Elsa in proper control of her awesome ice powers (which are hella scary but also very useful in the national defense) instead of just messing the poor kid up about them. Anna comes by on the weekends and while they're a little strained at first, once Elsa comes home to be Queen, they become fast friends again. Elsa also gets 9 more songs.

Sounds good to me