and the spookiest

Top Ten Spookiest Classical Pieces

Perhaps I’m feeling macabre, but tonight I’m digging out my favorite spooky classical pieces and listening to them. So I thought putting together a top ten list of these would be fun while I drink my scotch. Note: These are not really in any particular order. I love them all.

1. Beethoven: Piano Trio in D major, op. 70 no. 1, “Ghost” - 2nd movement. Rattling of chains, shrieking of spirits; the nickname of this trio fits it well. The first and third movements are good as well, but only the second movement is really spooky.
2. Schubert: Der Leiermann (from Winterreise). A heartbroken young man sings about the hurdy-gurdy, an outcast who sits just outside the village and plays his instrument while dogs snarl at him and people ignore him. Particularly chilling is that this is the last song of an hour-long cycle, and it drones on without clear resolution, ending with the line: “Strange old man, should I go with you? Will you accompany my songs on your hurdy-gurdy?” 
3. Mussorgsky: Night On Bald Mountain. You may know this one from Disney’s Fantasia, which is featured during the Witches’ Sabbath sequence.
4. Schubert: Der Erlkönig. Based on a poem by Goethe, this song tells the chilling story of a father and his ailing child riding through the woods on horseback, while a malicious spirit tries to lure the boy away, unseen and unheard by the father.
5. Saint-Saens: Danse Macabre. Death plays his fiddle in the cemetery, rousing all the skeletons from their graves and dancing with them until they have to slink back at the first light of dawn.
6. Brahms: Ballade in D minor, op. 10 no. 1, “Edward.” Based on a Scottish ballade, the story is of a mother who knows that her son has murdered his father - she just wants to hear him say it himself.
7. Shostakovich: Viola Sonata. Shostakovich composed during the height of Soviet censorship, and his music almost always has a hunted, almost panicked feel to it. He composed this viola sonata just a month before his death.
8. Shostakovich: String Quartet no. 8 in C minor, op. 110. Between the frenzy of the second movement and the insistent “knocking on the door” of the fourth, this quartet can really put you on edge. What makes this music even freakier is Shostakovich’s musical signature (D E-flat C B) throughout the work.
9. Mussorgsky: The Hut of Baba Yaga the Witch (from Pictures at an Exhibition). This one always sounds like Baba Yaga’s “Hut On Chicken’s Legs” is chasing me through the woods, but that might just be my wild imagination.
10. Scriabin: Piano Sonata no. 9, “Black Mass.” Some of the directions that Scriabin writes in the score are “mysteriously murmuring”, and “with a sweetness that becomes increasingly poisonous,” which is a pretty apt description for much of this work. It begins mysteriously, then builds in tension until it all explodes in some kind of orgiastic climax. It ends just as enigmatically as it begins.

My new meds make my skin throw a fit. It’s not terribly bad, just a few things here and there, but it’s bumming me out because I’ve never really had too many run-ins with acne.

My four-year-old sister, however, is under the impression that it’s just “3D freckles”, and that they look very, very pretty. She wants all of my freckles to “pop out”, especially the ones across my nose; they’re her favourite.

And it puts me in this weird position where I can’t say, “No, this is acne, and it’s bad,” because I don’t want to teach her that it’s a bad to have unclear skin, you know? I tried to tell her that my skin was sick because of the new medicine, but she was having none of it. She didn’t think they were any different than all of my literal, actual freckles, despite my efforts to delicately tell her otherwise.

Kids are weird.

The more I think about interactions I have with children, the more I realise that children will consistently compliment “flaws” until they’ve been taught not to.

Like, a kid at the library, whose sister has vitiligo, saw my scars once and suggested that his sister and I should be cats for Halloween, since I have “tabby skin” and she has “calico skin”. “I can be a black cat,” he immediately added. “It’s not AS cool, but they’re the spookiest.”

When I started losing weight, my little brother immediately demanded that I gain it back, because I wasn’t as comfortable to cuddle with anymore.

And my other little sister always wants to wear her paint-stained clothes to school so that “everyone can tell [she’s] an artist”.

I don’t know. I guess talking to little kids just reminds me that all of this superficial shit we worry about really is 100% made up.

There was once a post on 4chan’s paranormal board /x/ about a bunch of guys stumbling upon this house in the middle of the woods and provided a bunch of photos for proof. They found this decaying man in a chair and a notebook containing what he ate, most of which was just pages and pages of chicken and “cans” with little else. I remember one of the photos was a room that had a whole model train set. It was all very well done, if it was a fabrication. Does anyone have any archived threads of this? It was one of the spookiest posts I’ve ever seen on /x/ and I’d love to experience it all again.

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Alaska is gonna star in VH1 new reality series “Scared Famous” priemiering Oct 23.

“The frightening and hilarious tale of ten celebs who have bravely agreed to move into one of the spookiest mansions in America. Over eight episodes, they face terror and chilling challenges inspired by the iconic movies that make you scream. In this reality fright fest, ten famous people will move in, but only one will make it out alive.”

2P!s as Brandon Rogers’ Quotes

2P!Italy:  “Yeah, we sell organic kale chips. They’re on the homosexual hipster aisle next to the recycled toilet paper, you glitter dick.”

2P!Romano: “Try me, bitch.”

2P!Germany:  "Three years ago my husband went out one night for a beer, but that beer was all the way in Tennessee and had much bigger tits.”

2P!Prussia: “Oh, what are you supposed to be, a disappointment?”

2P!Japan: “You know what happens to little girls that wear skirts that short? A white van picks them up and they get all their holes resized.. Not you, Melissa, you’re never getting molested.”

2P!America: “Boy, pull up yo’ god damn pants. The spookiest thing in the store is that a dick that small is in my gene pool.”

2P!England: “I’m making copies. MOVE, I’M GAY.”

2P!France: “Hello, welcome to Mashie Mart/the park, thank you for bringing your fucking kids.”

2P!Russia: “Why don’t you get your math done before you get pregnant?” OR “You, in the slutty outfit - you’re not getting pregnant on my jungle gym.”

2P!China: “You wanna become what? A doctor? I wanted to become a ballerina, and you know what I became? HIV Positive.” OR “You, in the yellow - if you find drugs you better count me in.”

2P!Canada: “It’s fucking colder than a witch’s tit out here.”

We want your spookiest art!

Okay, it’s slightly early for Halloween it’s never too early, but that time of the year is coming up on us faster than a skeleton with a chainsaw. We’d love to feature some new Halloween-themed fanworks on the October edition of Community Showcase Live, but we have to start putting the show together at the beginning of the month. If you’d like a chance to have your Halloween-themed arts, crafts, music, or other powerful and horrifying dark works haunt the livestream, posting them in early-to-mid October is your best bet!

Consider this a…

heads up.