and the boys know it themselves

The gender reveal
  • (The year is 2017; Harry and Draco, aged 37, find themselves at a gender reveal party.)
  • Draco: I don't understand this at all, Potter.
  • Harry, sighing: It's George's newest bestseller. St Mungo's sends WWW the fetus's sex and they magic fireworks to reveal the news. Blue fireworks for boy, pink for girl.
  • Draco: I know that. What I don't understand is why.
  • Harry: It's insane. That's why you don't understand. And another thing! It's not a "gender" reveal. It's a "sex" reveal.
  • Draco, raising an eyebrow: You and Hermione need to stop reading those Witch and Gender Studies books.
  • Harry: I'm serious! All they know is whether the baby will come out with a penis!
  • Draco: Admittedly, an important factor. Oh Salazar, look. We are not playing this game, Harry.
  • Harry: What are they doing?!
  • Draco: I think they're Charming one team blue and one team pink and having them race? This is so undignified. Quick, Disillusion me. Did you bring your Cloak?
  • Harry: Shut up. What I don't understand is, who cares if they have a boy or a girl?
  • Draco: Say what you want about Pureblood traditions, Potter. Call us regressive. Call us bigoted. We would never tolerate this nonsense. Only you barmy progressives could come up with something so preposterous.
  • Harry: Oh bloody hell. Now they have pink and blue cakes and we're supposed to guess the sex by way of eating cake.
  • Draco: Can I demand a blue cake with pink frosting?
  • Harry, laughing: Yes! Let's do it! Let's sneak up and Transfigure them! You make the blue frosting pink on yours. I'm going to make my whole cake rainbow. Can I write "Queer AF" on top? That's what the kids say these days, right?
  • Draco, smirking: Oh, I dare you. If you actually do that, I will do the dishes for a month.
  • ....... Five minutes later......
  • Harry, grimacing: I've never seen a grandmother so angry.
  • Draco, scowling: I've never been accused of brainwashing a fetus before.
  • Harry: Do you think we can leave yet?
  • Draco: Potter, you are the most conspicuous guest at any gathering. No, I don't think we can sneak out before the penis-status announcement.
  • Harry: Have I mentioned how stupid I think this is.
  • Draco: A few hundred times. And though you know I agree with you, you need to stop whining about it.
  • Harry, smirking: Make me, Malfoy.
  • *Heated snogging*
  • Draco: Oh good, here comes the announcement about the presence or absence of the fetus vagina.
  • Harry, snickering: I don't think I've ever heard you say the word 'vagina' before.
  • Draco: Well, it's not in my general vocabulary.
  • Harry: Thank Merlin for that. ... Oh God, here it comes.
  • *Fireworks*
  • Draco: Annnnnnnnnd the fetus has a penis.
  • Harry: I don't understand how I'm supposed to be feeling right now. Am I supposed to be happy?
  • Draco: I don't know. Salazar. I am NOT wearing one of those "It's a Wizard!" hats.
  • Harry: Can we leave yet?
  • Draco: Yes, thank Merlin.
  • Harry: Do we have to say goodbye?
  • Draco: You have absolutely no manners.
  • Harry: Well what the fuck am I supposed to say? Glad to hear your fetus has a cock?
  • Draco: Just shut your mouth and I will do the pleasantries for both of us, then we can go home and I'll show you what else has a cock.
  • Harry, leering: Can we do a reveal with fireworks?

anonymous asked:

I saw the tickling ask. Whenever you do this ask, can you do the same thing with Tendou, Kuroo, Bokuto, Oikawa, and Iwaizumi? Thanks!

Yay, more cuteness with the adorable boys! And for those who haven’t seen the original request, it’s right here!

Hope that you enjoy these as much as you enjoyed the other ones, Anon!


Tendou Satori

  • I feel like no one would really see the tickle attack coming, not because they’re that oblivious, but more like they’re so focused on their practice that it’s a total surprise to everyone. They’d be all casual on the sidelines and then next thing any of them know they’ve stationed themselves behind Tendou with an ‘innocent’ smile on their face.
  • Oh, and when they suddenly make their attack, Tendou will make this weird ‘eeeeek’ noise and he just FALLS into it. Like he puts all his weight into their hands and just lets them handle whatever consequences that they brought upon themselves. Probably more often than not it ends up with both of them flat on the floor of the court.
    • Practice is totally interrupted from that point on. After all, it would be hard to have practice with Tendou laying heavily on his significant other lamenting that they’ve taken him down while they’re shouting that he’s crushing them.

Kuroo Tetsurou

  • Dude, boy would just let it happen, especially if he caught on to what they were doing. He’s even create the perfect opportunity for them. He ends up walking over to them on the sidelines and stretches his arms open wide, practically begging for them to take the opportunity.
    • And once they took that chance he would grin all wide just before moving to wrap his arms tight around them, trapping their hands at his sides where he then takes advantage to return the attack they inflicted on him.
  • It doesn’t matter who’s calling for help, everyone in the gym will ignore them. It’s probably gotten to the point where no one really even notices anymore, they just let them do their thing while everyone else continues to practice without their captain.

Bokuto Koutarou

  • AHHH, this precious boy wouldn’t have any idea what hit him. He’d be so stoked that his significant other came to see him during practice and he’s want to show up to them, but everyone can see the real motivation behind them being there that day.
  • Oh goodness, and when they finally attack him, this boy just lets out a completely surprised and startled SHRIEK. His hands would try and reach for their’s at their sides, body instantly curling around itself as he’s completely taken over by laughter.
    • This boy just loves it, one hundred percent, these are the kinds of things he lives for within relationships. And he’d get this giant goofy smile on his face when they’re finished and he’s just so SMITTEN. Everyone is surely hoping they’d get a room, lol!

Oikawa Tooru

  • Dude, just imagine them coming up behind Oikawa when he’s in the zone for his serve. He’d be staring down the other side of the court with those intense eyes just before the loudest, highest pitched noise comes from his mouth at the contact of their hands at his sides.
    • He would instantly CRUMBLE to the floor with the volleyball clung tight to his chest because he just doesn’t know what to do! He’s being attacked and he’s clinging to anything in his hands, lol, everyone else thinks it’s the most amusing thing.
  • Oh, and he would be so OFFENDED that they had betrayed him in that way! Like “[First Name]-chan! How could you?!” But believe that they’ve just made themselves targets for Oikawa’s revenge, and he’ll have no mercy whatsoever!

Iwazumi Hajime

  • Aw, this sweet boy wouldn’t even know what hit him when they started tickling at his sides. His eyes would go all wide and a weird sputtering laugh would come out of him as he immediately tries to grapple at the hands that were inflicting such panic into his being.
  • Lol, and he’d probably give some kind of call out for help, but when any of the other third years come over, they would immediately join in on the torture of this little hedgehog (because that laughing face is surely adorable!)
    • He’d eventually escape, gasping for the breath that he lost during the onslaught and he’d turn to them with this glare on his face. But this boy can’t say mad at his significant other for long, all they have to do is make it up to him in kisses, deal with his pouting a little, and they’ll be all set!
Unexpected: Bundle of Joy

A get’s the surprise of a life time when a baby is dropped off at their doorstep and with A’s luck B decided to make a surprise appearance. A is a single child and knows next to nothing on how to take care of one where as B comes from a rather large family consisting of six uncles, five aunts, three brothers, four sisters, and more cousins than Stephen Hawking could ever hope to fathom.

So between A’s freaking out and having no idea what to do B’s just padding around the house, with the baby, simply making themselves at home with this deadpan look on their face that A can tell says “Ya done fucked up” with a capital F.

A few days pass by and A makes the decision of a life time when they decide to keep their little baby boy/girl and B spittake’s all over the blank adoption papers and the two procceed to bicker as the child watches them blankly as if it already knows “these idiots are my parents…”

Throughout the first few months A and B don’t actually get together but are always mistaken for a couple and they, despite all the intimate gestures initiated by both persons, deny all acusations when they go out together with little baby what’s-it in tow. But after a truly frustrating day A comes home to an erily quiet, though messy, home and makes their way to the baby’s room where B is standing over the crib cooing it to sleep, and it’s there that A realizes that their fucked, head over heals for their best friend and basically step-mother/father to their child.

Whether things get messy from there or smoothly transition smoothly from friends to lovers is up to the writer.

Supergirl comicon fuckupery

Wow….. 😑😑😑 From checking my phone in the morning the day has just got progressively worse for the supergirl cast…. every few minutes it seems someone has done something to make it worse for themselves I think if the cast had stopped with the screaming they could of maybe redeemed themselves, but boy do they know how to bury themselves in it I legit cannot believe the things Melissa, Jeremy, Chris, Mechad and David have said/done- defending homophobia with tiredness and the fact you were on glee or have a musical background (fyi glee doesn’t make u an LGBT ally, being a decent human being does). And don’t even get me started on Jeremy’s “apology” I mean at least he actually pilublically spoke about the incedent even if it were the world’s most offensive apology I’m still gonna watch supergirl but it’s gonna be hard to watch kara, winn, james, mon-el and john on the show knowing what they’ve done- even if we shouldn’t judge characters by their actors or vice versa Katie and Odette are angels we don’t deserve and it really shows the kind of person odette is when I already love her from just her reactions to 1 interview I also like to think Chyler would of wiped the floor with the others if she were there Today has just been…. a complete and utter fuck up!! 😓

Originally posted by morepopcornplease

anonymous asked:

But just... what if the boys (dark, anti, author, all the dark bois) had a S/O that just... didn't misbehave. They're good, never do anything naughty. What do they do???

Oh my god they wouldn’t know what to do with themselves AT ALL??? Like, Dark I think would just spoil them rotten,Anti would try to convince them to misbehave, etc etc

5

So the tanks are sparsely decorated for now. I’m officially making the switch to silk plants only. I don’t know if it’s the stress of moving things around or if he damaged his fins on the plants, but almost all of the regrowth we had is gone. It honestly looks like fun biting because of the severity of the damage but this is the last straw.

I want my boys to have beautiful fins. I don’t want to risk them hurting themselves anymore.

So. With that being said, does anyone know where I can find aquarium safe silk plants for a decent price? The ones sold at my LFS are 10 bucks for 1 plant and that’s just steep especially when I want them to have at least 3 plants each.

Representation Matters

Here are just a few LGBTQ+ Tumblrs promoting advocacy and representation within the community. 

Originally posted by mattahan

Bklyn Boihood (@bklynboihood​)

Bklyn Boihood is where “black, brown queer and trans bois*” can follow, cultivate, or show off all kinds of creative work. Their offline events are mainly held in Brooklyn, but their online presence is here for anyone who could benefit from their expressive, welcoming atmosphere.

Originally posted by mykidsgay

My Kid is Gay (@mykidsgay​)

If you’re a kid who just came out to your parents (or you want to soon), think about sending them to this nice informational hub. It was created by the same people behind fan-favorite Everyone is Gay (@everyoneisgay​). We hope your parents support you no matter what and love you unconditionally always. If you can, let them know educating themselves can go a long way, too—especially if they’ve never been exposed to conversation around queer culture.

Originally posted by theadvocatemag

The Advocate (@theadvocatemag​)

The Advocate was founded in 1967. They’re celebrating 50 years of continuous publication, 50 years of fighting for what is right, 50 years of making sure you stay in the know. Give this downright historic publication a follow to interject a little news on your dashboard.

Queer Kid Stuff (@queerkidstuff​)

The subject of LGBTQ+ culture and education is still rarely discussed in media aimed at children. This web series is a lovely, engaging way to educate kids on LGBTQ+ topics. Lindsay and Teddy make videos, offer coloring sheets, and even have a section “4” grown ups.

George Miller Reveals Fury Road Sequel Will Feature a “Urine-Oriented Society”

George Miller has spent decades creating the weird, wonderful, high-octane world of the Mad Max franchise. The series’ last installment, Fury Road, featured paint-huffing adolescent “war boys” who worship the car engine as a deity, but Miller says the next movie – which remains untitled – will go even further.

“What we’re looking at is essentially a urine-oriented society,” says Miller. “They separate themselves into two castes, the pee boys and the troughmen, and the troughmen treat the pee boys pretty roughly. It’s clear who is in charge.”

This society was actually founded by a relative of Immortan Joe, the last film’s main antagonist, Miller goes on to say.

“You know, with Joe, we took the idea that all his children have something wrong with them, some deformity,” he explains. “That’s why he was so upset in Fury Road when he lost his child – it was his first perfect child, his first suitable heir. The founder of the piss society is one of Joe’s sons who got the shorter end of the stick. He was born with twice the piss of a normal, healthy human.”

Miller goes on to say that this “piss society” has been fighting against Joe’s regime for decades, though this wasn’t addressed in Fury Road. Joe’s death has left a power vacuum in the area, he explains, so the pee boys are rising to take his place.

Read the full interview on VICE Entertainment here.

6

via [x]

[Mikki Kendall tweeted: “I am fascinated by how many people have assumed the kid having the tantrum on the train is on the spectrum & thus needs extra patience. I can say with some authority a Black kid on the spectrum having that same issue wouldn’t get half as much patience nor would his parent. My youngest is on the spectrum. He had a tantrum in our house when he was 2. My white neighbor threatened to call the cops on me. But okay… When I tell you that my kids couldn’t act that way? That’s totally the voice of experience. Because Black boys on the spectrum can’t do that. At least not if you want to avoid being reported to DCFS or having them handcuffed at school or you know… shot by a cop. Just saying. This is the voice of bitter Black mom speaking though. Because I spend 2-3 days every year at his school dealing with racist assumptions. Black boys do not get to have tantrums in public. They do not get to have them at school either. No matter what’s going on. Trust me on that. Because (and here is indeed a fuck you very much) they will get killed if they cannot control themselves. No matter what’s going on. I have to make sure kid #2 doesn’t have a meltdown in public, isn’t too loud at home either. We live in the hood for a reason. If he’s having a rough day? My neighbors won’t call the cops. They will look out for him. But then they’re Black & they get it. We literally work with him constantly on impulse control & self soothing. Because I want him to live past 20. [link to related NPR article]

“There’s no compassion for kids like my son. My patience for your white ass feelings about Black parenting is pretty much nonexistent. I’m a hardass. I know that. I do. But then I’ve had a dozen  giant red warning signs that my kid can’t stay alive if he’s not in control. Get at me when your kid on the spectrum has a meltdown & you get a call about the possibility of charges being pressed for yelling. Because he’s tall & Black & repeated the same profanity as all the other kids involved in the fight. Call me when you realize he’s at risk. I want you to sit at a table & listen to an adult white woman tell you she doesn’t like teaching your kid because he’s scary at 8. Not that he’s been violent or threatening. Nope. He just yelled at her one day after she blamed him for being bullied. Go to that meeting. Get a call about your kid being a problem because he’s too flat when he speaks. Not that he’s done anything. They don’t like his voice. Have the “We’re going to write him up for trespassing” conversation because your kid sat in an empty classroom to study. Have that call. My kids get good grades. They don’t do half the shit I did. But I have two sons & I stay in their schools keeping them safe from admins. Meanwhile one of my neighbors did 10 years for attempted murder. He’s got no training. But he stops & chats with every kid on our block. He warns them off gangs & listens when they’re mad. He helped teach kid #2 to throw a football. Because he knows how easy it is to get lost. The grace you show to white kids? Try showing it to all kids. Our girls aren’t grown at 5 & our boys aren’t weapons at birth.“]

idol: thank you everyone we know we were a disappointment and we could have done better we will try even harder next time sorry™

me:

Hey children, Did You Know?
Representation isn’t exclusively important for the people being represented!!!
White kids need to watch POC being heroes too!!! It shows them that people can save the day regardless of their race!!!
Boys need to watch girls being strong and powerful!!!! It shows them that people deserve respect regardless of their gender!!!
Slim kids need to see confident and adored fat characters!!!! It shows them that everyone can be loved and love themselves regardless of their body types!!!!
Cishet kids need to watch queer kids falling in love (or just not falling in love!!!) and having happy endings!!! It shows that everyone is valid and everyone deserves to be happy regardless of sexuality or identity!!!!
Representation isn’t just for minorities, it’s important so that kids can learn that yes, they can be whoever they want to be and they deserve good things, but so do people who aren’t like them!!!!

Portlanders who want to stand up against racism in a very direct fashion, look no further:

PDX - “Based Spartan,” “Based Stickman,” “Baked Alaska,” and a cadre of assorted white nationalist goons are flying in from all over the country on 6/4 to converge on Portland. Some of these folks call themselves ‘The Proud Boys’ and are completely dedicated to physically fighting for alt-right / white nationalist causes. If you’re unaware, there’s already a fairly large white supremacist presence in Portland, too. They’re all masquerading as “free speech” proponents and using Trump’s name as a not-that-far-from-the-truth shield.

Don’t know if any of y'all are familiar with what happened in Berkeley, but they’re trying to outdo themselves here in Portland.

If this event goes unchallenged, it normalizes and legitimizes white nationalist demonstration in a city, state, region of the country that is inherently and intentionally white supremacist.

I will remind you that the last rally organized by these SAME PEOPLE had yesterday’s murderer/terrorist in attendance. We need numbers. We need everyday people to stand up in opposition. Allowing this to go unchecked is exactly why people died yesterday

our little family pt.1 | park jimin

Pairing: Father! Jimin + Reader 

Genre: Fluff/Angst + parent au 

Word Count: 2.8k

Summary: You were just a pre-school teacher, a simple dream that came true as you always adored children. But what you didn’t know, was how one child and her very special father would change you dream forever. 

Parts: 1 2

“Jieun-ah, please.” Jimin sighed, as he tried putting her arms through the sleeves of her baby pink coat, which she shrugged back off again for the nth time making Jimin let out a soft groan in exasperation.

“Jieun-ah…” Jimin pleaded.

“I don’t want to go to school daddy.” Jieun said softly, pouting as she looked at her dad with round eyes, the corners watering slightly as Jimin felt his resolve weaken at the sight of his little girl before him.

Sighing, he grabbed her hands and put on a large grin, “Jieun-ah, It’ll be fun!” he tried cheering, “Daddy had loved going to school all his life (what a lie) and really wished he could go again.”

“Then why don’t you come with me?” Jieun asked, tugging at the ends of her little pale blue sundress, the color contrasting strongly against her raven blank hair that tumbled around her shoulders in soft curls.

Cradling her face in his hands, her cheeks squishing up together making Jimin chuckle slightly, he said, “Daddy’s too old now, but if anything happens I’ll be there for you, alright? Do you wanna go now? I promise it’ll be great.”

“Pinky promise?” Jieun asked, holding out her pinky to Jimin’s face as he laughed a little, hooking her tiny pinky within his and bringing them together before pressing a small kiss to her hands, “I promise baby.”

“Hi guys!! Welcome! Hello!” you smiled happily as the kids walked one by one into your class, all their faces with expressions that varied, some happy, some mad, some scared and some with tears and snot dripping from their little noses.

Oh children. 

“There you go Jieun-ah, I’ll pick you up in a couple hours okay?”

Keep reading

you’ve stopped saying i love you to me every night, like you used to before. should i be worried that you don’t love me anymore or is it once again my fear talking. its ironical how i used to tell my friends to believe in actions and not words but i find myself wondering why you have stopped saying those words. i find myself wondering what could i have done wrong. i know what i could have done wrong. but how can three words have the power to make someone feel miserable about themselves in seconds, but how can three words have power to make someone feel alive in seconds. but how can these three words change someone’s life in seconds.
—  i l y// nikitagupta