and thats why the certificate is like that

anonymous asked:

kind of a stupid question but I'm kind of confused by this passage in "Christmas in Kansas" "Even setting aside the other, more obvious problem. 'Clark takes after his grandmother'" what did you mean by this?

Jonathan is in the habit of telling people that his mother is Sicilian, and that Clark takes after her, and that’s why Clark is taller and darker than both of his parents. He says it’s his mother because he wants to be sure that no one thinks Martha was cheating on him with some strange huge guy. The vast majority of people have no problem accepting this explanation, and will then go on to tell stories about their own family members who ended up looking nothing like their parents because it skipped a generation.

(though the Kents will often hear that he has their eyes, or their smile)

But also, Jonathan is trans. Which is not actually obvious, but Bruce is Batman. Noticing shit that he should not be able to notice is kind of his whole deal. It’s the biggest reason why Clark cannot possibly look like his paternal grandmother, and that’s why Jonathan is always tickled pink when no one ever has any problem with it. Because why would they! He’s Pa Kent, the guy with the fun stories and the good weed and the cranky wife.

He still tells Bruce that Clark takes after his grandmother, because he knows full well that Bruce is in on the joke.

lilyevenspotter  asked:

What you said just now, about people not actually dying at 35 and young girls not being able to get their periods because of malnourishment--that's really quite fascinating and it makes so much more sense than the whole "fifteen year olds had three kids" thing, but I've never heard that before! Do you have any books explaining it? I'd really like to learn more about it. I hate when people tell me that from a biological standpoint I should be a mother by now.

Honestly that is a huge part of WHY I hate this myth, people use it as a way to shame people for not having kids and to SEXUALISE children. Peter Laslett has a book documenting marriage certificates that show average ages of marriage. There is also this from Wikipedia:

“The average age at which the onset of puberty occurs has dropped significantly since the 1840s.[69][70][71] In every decade from 1840 to 1950 there was a drop of four months in the average age of menarche among Western European females.

In Norway, girls born in 1840 had their menarche at an average age of 17 years. In France, the average in 1840 was 15.3 years. In England, the average in 1840 was 16.5 years. In Japan the decline happened later and was then more rapid: from 1945 to 1975 in Japan there was a drop of 11 months per decade.”

There are a lot more and I’m sure others can pitch in, I’ll see if I can find more, there was a great book I read that spoke on it but I can’t remember what it was.

as for dr phil everyone on the internet has rumors and talks shit about the man but i’ve never seen a single episode, AND I’VE SEEN A LOT TRUST ME, where he hasn’t 100% gauranteed that either a parent goes to the things he’s set up to help them better themselves, or he’ll take their kids away.

like he sits there and threatens it like ‘if you do not take this seriously, your kids are gone’ and that’s important to me.

growing up under parental neglect and abuse and having had such a shit life like, i’m a mandated reporter as well, and to see that no matter what the outcome, Dr. Phil 100% is  for the children.

You can bitch all you want about your spouse or defend your drug problems, but if you don’t, in the end, give in to change, he won’t hesitate to make sure your children or put somewhere where your shit can’t touch them.

he’s also had idiots evading the law on his show and when they don’t agree to do shit he 100% hands them over to the law and its hilarious

This probably sounds bad but if you saw the people that are on the program? Llike, ‘haha they’re gross they’re rejoicing in kids being taken from their parents’, you’d be sitting there going ‘why are you letting them go home’ if he didn’t lmao.

He helps these children so much and i just.

scree.

the signs as things Donald Trump has said
  • Aries: "I have a great relationship with the blacks. I've always had a great relationship with the blacks."
  • Taurus: [On his daughter] "She does have a very nice figure . . . if [she] weren't my daughter, perhaps I'd be dating her."
  • Cancer: "You know, it doesn't really matter what [the media] write as long as you've got a young and beautiful piece of ass."
  • Gemini: “Laziness is a trait in blacks."
  • Leo: "It's freezing and snowing in New York--we need global warming!"
  • Virgo: “Black guys counting my money! I hate it. The only kind of people I want counting my money are short guys that wear yarmulkes every day."
  • Libra: [On Obama] "Why doesn't he show his birth certificate? There's something on that birth certificate that he doesn't like."
  • Scorpio: "All of the women on The Apprentice flirted with me—consciously or unconsciously. That's to be expected."
  • Sagittarius: {Not a quote but} the entire fact that he called on Obama for not producing a birth certificate and then said he'd show his just to make a point, but then the birth certificate he produced was fake
  • Capricorn: "Our leaders are stupid, our politicians are stupid, and the Mexican government is much sharper, much more cunning. [So] they send the bad ones over because they don’t want to pay for them, they don’t want to take care of them.”
  • Aquarius: "Sorry losers and haters, but my I.Q. is one of the highest -and you all know it! Please don't feel so stupid or insecure,it's not your fault"
  • Pisces: "When Mexico sends its people, they're not sending their best. They're sending people that have lots of problems, and they're bringing those problems to us. They're bringing drugs. They're bringing crime. They're rapists. And some, I assume, are good people."
  • *NOTE: this post has nothing to do your sign; it merely calls attention to Trumps idiocy. No need to take offense

what gets me is when christians are like “sex outside of marriage causes more unwanted pregnancies!!" 

like

sex inside of marriage causes unwanted pregnancies. when you sign a marriage certificate you’re not signing an "i want to have babies” certificate. why is this so hard for some people to believe. you can be married and not want to be pregnant.

anonymous asked:

Tatinof advice please

sure! 
1) Have fun! its a great show! you will make some amazing friends and the show is amazing. 

2) have fun at the meet and greet (if you get it) 

3) Dont bother waiting outside for Dan and phil. i don’t want to seem rude or saying they are but like the UK tour they didn’t stop and take photos with people outside, since people are paying to meet them they don’t want to hang around outside, so please dont get pissy if they do not stop. i really wouldn’t bother waiting outside for them at all personally as its no point. 

4) If you don’t have a ticket do not go, as you are only going to make it worse for yourself that you arent going to be able to see them, but you will also cause problems for staff as they need to keep the people who have paid safe and thats what their licence covers. it don’t cover annoying shits who are stalking. 

5) dont take the piss in meet and greets. you only get a few seconds with them so don’t try and make that last for minutes as you will be taking it away from others in the queue. they have a set time for the meet and greet and can not go over as they need to get changed for the show. so if you ‘hog the time’ and take it away from others you are being a bit of an asshole. you wouldn’t like it done to you so dont do it to others. 

6) try not to put them in tiaras and girly clothes, i mean sure it looks funny but come on phils nearly 30 he doesnt really want to be looking like a little girl for your entertainment. 

7) Listen to security, if they say ‘only photos and one thing signed’ that means ONLY PHOTOS AND ONE THING SIGNED that dont mean ‘phone my friend’ ‘let me record this’ ‘oh my god can you just make a video for my friend’ if you defy the rules security will be assholes to you. Just follow the god damn rules they arent that hard. 

8 ) try not to cry. the staff will treat you like ‘ a crazy psyco fan’ and Dan and phil always ends up looking awkward even though they comfort you and try their best they still end up looking awkward and i mean why would you want your only 30 seconds with them ruined with you blubering and your photo ruined??? 

9) Don’t try and fake panic attacks/anxiety attacks, first of all thats not ‘cool’ its fucking sick and second it ‘wont give you more time with Dan and Phil’ I wish i could say this DIDNT happen at the UK tour but it did. 

10) Try and not get them to sign things like ‘ birth certificates’ ‘phan is real’ ‘wedding things’ ‘adoption things’ as its cringy as fuck. 

11) DONT SPOIL THE SHOW LIKE DONT EVEN THINK ABOUT IT!!!!

12) DO NOT STALK THEIR HOTEL!!!! 

13) TREAT MARTYN AND CORNELIA LIKE THE SWEET ANGELS THEY ARE!!! 

anonymous asked:

ok but one of the crew on twitter confirmed that the gems and steven lay low and pearl has no driver's license which i find much funnier. theres no records of them anywhere. or of steven. the most the boy has is maybe a birth certificate but probably not either. no one should even know he exists. thats why no one made the kid go to school ever cus theres def one in beach city weve been told kiki and jenny have homework but goddamn no one knows of this boy aside from like the 15 people in town

The Boy Who Wasn’t

themysticdreambouquet  asked:

No really, okay, for example female hearts are drastically different from male hearts. That's why female heart attacks feel different from male ones. There must be other organs that are like that. I'm no doctor, but I can see how a box for biological gender could be important. Just pointing out a fact, don't want to get involved, don't know the full story, please don't attack me.

The doctors probably aren’t going to have to rely on what the person’s driver’s licence says anyways. I doubt they’d even look at it.

Birth certificates would still have M or F. Medical records would still show it. Etc.