Does clitoris size matter? Mine is bigger than the porn stars and I feel like I have the ugliest vagina because of it. I wanted a man (other than the one I'm having sex with)'s opinion
Nope, perfectly normal.
Listen, I know everyone’s embracing this whole “everyone’s special and beautiful” thing but when it comes down to it, whether you’re a porn star or a regular person, dicks and pussies are kinda weird looking. All of them. Dicks kinda take the lead in weirdness but still.
They become attractive when they’re attached to someone you care about - either emotionally or sexually.
Plus, y'know… bigger target I guess. That’s never a bad thing, right?
Im kinda of an atheist agnostic but this whole Christianity thing scares me. there is so much evidence but even that I can deny but this fact that I feel so good so alive when I think about Jesus is just plain weird like what? why is that I am feeling really down lately and so lonely and all and one thought of Jesus out of the blue and I am feeling better that is so weird and it feels like I am being draged into this whole Christianity thing like God is bringing me down to see that I need Jesus
You’re absolutely and incredibly loved. What you’re experiencing is the pursuit of one who’s thoughts of you outnumber the stars in the sky. He doesn’t wait until you believe in Him to start loving you, He doesn’t wait until you’re all cleaned up. He loves you perfectly and endlessly right now. My encouragement to you is to try something. Just try praying. And i’m not trying to get you to pray a prayer of salvation or do anything you may not be comfortable with. I just want you to pray one prayer. Ask your Father in Heaven this one question: How do you feel about me? Watch what He’ll show you.
Somethings wasn’t quite right about this whole thing. For one, his bed was too big. Too big and it smelt weird. Not bad weird, just different. There was also some strange warmth next to him. He was kind of really freaked out by that, so he opened his eyes and jolted suddenly.
This was not his room, his room had star wars posters and comic books. And he definitely never slept with someone before! He sits up quickly, scooting away from Gladstone, nearly falling out of bed.
Holy shit what did he do last night. Please tell me I did not sleep with this old guy… This old guy who is maybe kind of cute but definitely too old for him.
That’s when he notices something heavy nearly slipping off his finger.
What the hell. He never wore jewelry…
He lifted his hand out from under the covers, gravity pulling the ring down on his finger, where it would sit if it weren’t a size or two too big for his hand.
Watching Geekenders burlesque at home is a very dangerous game
like, it’s a Good Thing and I need Good Things right now
but there is also a chance that I will need to explain to my parents why the skinny dude in full gold body paint grinding against a lady on roller skates is A Star Wars Thing But Actually A Theater Thing But Actually A Portal Thing And No I Am Not Watching Really Weird Porn
and I, uh, really really really would like to not have to do this
I'm not sure if you watch The Flash, or watched last night's crossover, so stop here unless you don't care either way, but it seems weird to me that they sent Felicity to Central City while all this more important stuff is going on at home with Oliver, Roy, and so on. Just seemed kind of weird to me that they'd do that. Although I guess you could ask what there really is for her to do there right now with Roy in jail and Ollie not being Arrow for now. Hmm ...
I do watch The Flash.
And you’re not wrong nonnie. It’s seems weird, but it’s not the writer’s fault (at least not this time) the cw fucked up. I don’t know what happened, but Arrow is one episode ahead and it’s messing/making things seem weird, the correct order is:
Arrow 3x17 Suicidal Tendencies
Flash 1x18 All Star Team Up
Arrow 3x18 Public Enemy
Arrow 3x19 Broken Arrow (New episode!)
I’m re-watching in the correct order before the new episode airs tonight and I’m wondering if the rest of the possible crossovers between the two shows and The Flash ending a week later is algo going to mess up with the timeline? I don’t understand how the CW let this happen.
As soon as you and Mats were done talking in the locker room, you drove directly back to Mats’s house to pack your things so you didn’t do it while he was home. You were currently curled up on the bedroom floor crying your heart out with Max comforting you as best as he could. If Mario didn’t see you at the stupid fucking dog park, then you and Mats would be cuddled up in bed watching some weird soap opera while you fell asleep in each others warm embrace. But no. Mario always jacked things up and this time it had been your relationship.
Anger overtook your sadness now as you stood up and started some shoving your things roughly into your suitcase, thinking of ways to kill the Bayern Munich star. He did this on purpose. That little fucker wanted to get back at you for him being alone didn’t he.
You will rip his head off in his sleep. Karma right?
You knew most nights you wouldn’t sleep without those strong arms wrapped securely around your middle, so you put on one of Mats’s jackets which was oversize on your small frame.
You didn’t have any other place to stay in Dortmund, nor did you know anyone else besides Mats’s friends, so you texted Marco to ask if you could stay with him. Once you did, you double checked all of your items and bid your many good-bye’s to Max, you opened the front door and bumped into something hard and muscular.
Perfect timing Mats.
You backed up and briefly looked up at his face before returning your gaze to the floor. You just wanted to get around him
“You’re leaving already?” Mats questioned in a small voice.
“Yeah,” you cleared your throat and hastily wiped your eyes with the back of your hand with your head still dropped. “I thought it’d be easier to go before you got back.”
“Oh. Is this mine?” he asked, tugging at the dark red woolen jacket.
“Um, yeah,” you confirmed as you started removing his jacket.” I’m sorry you can-”
“No no, you have it. It looks better on you,” he interrupted.
“Oh. Thanks,” you managed to raise your eyes to his. Mats looked tired and worn out from today. His shoulders slouched forward, lips holding a weak grin, but his eyes seemed to bore into yours as if he was gazing to your soul.
There was a silent pause between you two before your phone buzzed. Breaking your long lasting eye contact, you fished your phone out of your pocket and viewed your phone’s text notification.
Marco responded to you, saying that he was outside.
You gazed back up at Mats, who was also reading the text, grin falling from his face into a unreadable expression. “I guess I should go now,” you said, voice slightly cracking.
Mats nodded, flashed you a fake smile and side stepped for you to exit.
You rolled your suitcase out the door and made your way to Marco’s black Audi, entered, and buckled yourself in without looking back. In fear of bursting into tears at the sight of Mats’s face.
Thankfully, Marco kept his mouth zipped the entire ride to his house. You’ve known Marco for quite some time now, since he was the person to introduce you to Mario. Who then introduced you to Mats. Marco was like your older brother and you could trust him with anything. So he understood when to keep quiet if you were upset.
You arrived at his house quicker than usual. Maybe because you were staring out the window contemplating like someone in a drama movie. Marco parked then ran around the car to open the door for you and take your suitcase. “Thank you Marc,” you said as you stepped out of his car.
He gave you a kind grin and wrapped a protective arm around you as you both entered his extravagant home. You’ve visited Marco’s house many times so you b-lined to the guest room to get some rest. It has been one hell of a long day for you and you literally prayed for sleep.
But that didn’t come. Thanks to your thoughts.
Turning your pillow to the cool side didn’t help either. You flopped out of bed and yourself downstairs to the kitchen for a glass of water. When you got there, you were surprised to see Marco there already.
Who is on the phone at 2 AM? And why hasn’t he changed put of his day clothes yet? You were drowsy, so your questions weren’t important at the time for you. With feet slapping on the wooden floor, you rounded the corner of the kitchen to retrieve your glass of water.
Marco ended his phone call when he saw you enter the kitchen and directed his attention to you. “Hey stranger,” he greeted. “How’s it going?”
“Great,” you replied quickly.
Marco’s expression turned serious. “How is it going? Really.”
You sighed heavily and turned to Marco, who was now sitting on a bar stool in front of you. “I don’t know anymore Marco. This morning was perfect. Everything was going fine then Mario fucking started something during the game - you saw it - he said something but Mats knows that I didn’t do anything with him. So why does he want to break up with me Marco? I don’t understand. Is he just tired of me?” you rambled.
Marco grabbed your hand and pulled you into his chest while stroking your hair, trying to soothe you. You let out soft sobs and clung to his shirt seeking comfort. “Just give him some time Y/N. He’ll come around eventually, but right now you need to sleep,” he cooed while scooping you up bridal style into his arms and carrying you to bed.
THREE WEEKS LATER.
You woke up to the smell of burning eggs and the sound of someone cursing like a sailor. You smiled as you visioned Mats trying to cook a romantic breakfast for you and ending up blackening the entire meal. But then you remembered that you weren’t in Mats’s house.
You jumped up out of bed and went downstairs to scope the scene. You expected to see Marco fumbling with pans and food covering every inch of the floor but instead of Marco, it was just the person you wanted to see/kill.
Mr. Mario Gotze.
“Damn it,” he cussed as he flicked the switch to the stove off and inspected the burnt food.
“W-why are you here?” you thought Marco knew about your rage with this particulat person. If he called him over here to make you two sort your issues, you were sure going to have an issue with Marco.
Mario turned around and smirked kindly as if he was the most innocent person in the world. “I heard from a little bird that you were here, so I thought you wanted to talk to me about stuff.”
Oh hell yes you needed to talk about ‘stuff.’
You rounded the bar and stood in front of Mario poking his chest as you spoke. “Do you have any idea how much torture you are putting through? I haven’t seen Mats in three damn weeks because of you, and you waltz up here and act like nothing even happened?”
Mario swatted your hand away from his chest. “You have no idea how much I have missed you. I just needed you alone. You’ve moved on so quickly it’s like you planned to get with him as soon as we broke up.” He moved closer to you, making you back up until your back hit a wall, trapped.
“You were the one who cheated on me so it was your fault we weren’t together anymore.”
“And I regret it overtime I think about you. Y/N I’m sorry. I still am in love with you and if you don’t love me, I understand,” Mario placed both of his arms on either side of you and leaned down closer to your face. “Just let me do this please.”
His soft lips connected with your cheek and gradually made their way to your lips, grazing them lightly. His breath felt warm against your face as the smell of his aftershave filled your nose, intoxicating you.
You accidentally let a small and quiet moan slip from your mouth. Mario took it as a invitation and slammed his mouth to yours. You weren’t sure what to do in a situation like this, so you kissed him back.
Mario grinned happily into the bruising kiss and gripped your legs to wrap them around your waist then rested his hands on your ass. You realised how far this was going and cupped his face with your hands and pulled him away with all the strength you could muster from your tiny arms.
“No Mario. Not again. We-I can’t. Mats is-”
“Yes we can. You aren’t with him anymore.”
He forced himself back onto you. He secured your bottom lip with his teeth and playfully bit it, eliciting a long moan from you. He moved one hand to grab your right breast and tore his mouth from yours and replaced it onto your neck.
“M-Mario. I can’t do this with you,” you slapped his hand away from you but still he still nipped at your neck. He groaned as you squirmed in his grasp grinding your hips against his growing hardness.
“Baby please. You’re killing me here,” Mario whined connecting your foreheads together.
You rapidly shook your head no. He hissed in disappointment and leaned forward to kiss you breaking away then kissing you again then breaking away again and kissing you slowly.
“Mario,” you warned as tried he swirl his tongue around yours one last time.
“Okay,” he replied before licking your lips slowly, trying to stall his time. And giving you quick pecks on the mouth. He finally set you down and stared into your eyes.
“I have missed you so much Y/N.”
Mario smirked as you tried to push him off of you telling him that he has to leave before Marco gets back from Lord knows where.
“So what did that kiss mean?” He asked you as he leaned against the doorframe of the front door.
He laughed loudly at your comment. “It obviously meant something to you my dear. You just don’t want to say it.”
“If you’re saying that I’ve missed you, then you can go ahead and delete that thought because I honestly don’t.
“Alright Y/N whatever you say.” Mario strode closer to you and gave you yet another wet, sweet, and passionate kiss before turning around and leaving.
Great, this is another reason why you could kill him. You closed the door and ran up to your room. You felt like a teengaer in freaking high school with all this boy drama.
Bruh. That ending though :O I decided to make this chapter to all of the Gotze lovers (you know who you are). ANNNDDD I will be getting back on track with the writing FREAKING SPRING BREAK HELL YEAH so sorry with the waiting and suck ;( You all are so very patient and kind for understanding <3 <3
p.s. I don’t know if this chapter is very good because it doesn’t really build up to anything I don’t think so tell me if you like it ^_^
If in the kingdom hearts series the stars like have to be aligned and it costs you literally more than an arm and a leg, plus your soul, to time travel and shit…
does Luxord do?
I mean, he has power over time right? And if to time travel you gotta do all this crazy shit then what do his powers do?
In KH2 the only weird thing he does that would HAVE to tie to his powers is that he surrounds soras squad with his cards, and they disafuckingppear.
Like??!!!?! what kind of time powers do that?!?!? did he create like a pocket in time or something!?!? CAN he time travel without restraint? and if so does that mean xehanort would have made him half a nort too???
i was tagged by interstellarpunkbitch which is really weird did you tag me then i messaged you or the other way round??? are we just telepathically linked?
Rules: repost and tag 10 people you want to get to know better
Birthday: 2nd march Star sigh: pisces Gender: female Height: 5′2 Favourite colour: purple Time and date right now: 21.07 4th april 2015 Average hours of sleep? 6 or 7 Lucky number: 2 Last thing I googled: taylor swifts cats First word that comes to mind: serendipitous One place that makes me happy: bed How many blankets I sleep under: a blanket and a duvet Favourite fictional character: ginny weasley or hermione granger (book versions obviously) Favourite Famous person: t-swift or beyonce Celebrity Crush: chris evans. i have literally no chill when it comes to his beard Favourite book: the book thief Favourite Animal: ferret Favourite shows: masterchef, pretty little liars, house, csi Favourite musician/ band: dixie chicks, fleetwood mac, taylor swift Favourite game: i am so the wrong person to ask for this Last movie I saw in cinema: shaun the sheep. it was so flipping great dont laugh Dream Holiday: the trip round the world im currently planning Dream job: author Wearing right now: jeans, fluffy socks, 2 jumpers Last book I read: i’m reading like 3 books atm but last book i finished was the graphic novel hrhqueenelizabeth bought me for my birthday
The Green's Apartment: A Queer Supernatural Webseries
‘The Green’s place, a crappy college rental, has some new summer tenants. Gary, Elena, and Tony are bored twenty-somethings spending thesummer in Chicago, looking for some fun, or so Tony says anyway. They seempretty weird to Phoebe, who lives across the hall, particularly Gary. Thatdoesn’t stop him from being entirely too attractive.’
So I just got a grant to make a webseries over the summer!
The webseries will be an adaptation of Shakespeare's As You Like It, starring a genderfuild Rosalind.
There’s a blog dedicated to this now! It’s right here! Please go follow and support this thing I’m doing!
Name: on here for all intents and purposes kiki Nickname: i will list all the nicknames broski-desu calls me which include: twerp, brat, keeks, senpai, there r probs more but im so lazy Birthday: June 23 1996 Star Sign: Cancer Gender: Female Height: 5 foot Sexual Orientation: i dont really know im like 10 Romantic Orientation: again im 10 Favorite Color: white??? hm i like pale pink n pale yellow and green Time and date at the moment: 8:34pm April 7th 2015
Average hours of sleep per night: 6-3??
Lucky Number: 24 The Last Thing I Googled: Chiyo Sakura’s height (thats right we’re the same height how cool she is me) First Word that comes to mind: chartreuse (what a weird colour huh) One Place that makes you happy: the ocean!!!!!! we have a place on the coast and i grew up swimming there and i know it so well and i really love my friends there idk its the happiest place for me How many blankets do I sleep under: one huuuge comfy blanket no matter what temperature. Favorite Fictional Character: Sakura Kinomoto the precious angel of my heart Favorite TV Show: arrested development! arrested development! Favorite Musician/Band: muse/ naruto openings Last Movie I Saw in Theaters: i can’t even remember the last time i went to a theatre…. maybe to see Annabelle last year?? Dream Holiday: somewhere where i can climb a mountain or somewhere that has a fruit orchard (im really hungry rn) ummm somewhere cold!
Dream Job: I’m an arts flake so i change all the time…I want to work for a non-gov organization or something to do with international relations, something where i can travel and help people, but also i really want to be an artist but that’ll always be a hobby i guess, oh!! i also really want to work with flowers!
Wearing right now: i’m still wearing a big winter coat and stockings because it’s cold and i don’t want to change because i will freeze Last Book I Read: Power Systems by Noam Chomsky i tag:broski-desu (did you see you were tagged before dude?) cinymaes0cksyca-kekashiasuka-jpegcoolsharkjpeg aaaaah any mutuals that wanna
I like Steven Universe but friendly reminder freaking out over actual real gems is kind of weird because they’re just a thing that’s always been there. Also their meanings and assigned star signs and other stuff, like, it’s been there for decades.
Like don’t get as bad as the Homestucks who freak out over card games and billiards and stuff. These are all normal things so don’t scream when you see anything related to it.
I was tagged by fortfuncat & lolaglo1012, tag people you would like to get to know better! Thanks you guys!
Name: dizzycat2000 (some people on here know my real name, but I’m still nervous about someone trying to steal my credit or something! ha. The internet can be weird.)
Nickname: Maka was my childhood nickname
Star sign: Aquarius
Sexual Orientation: Men, with a sidecar of certain famous girl crushes :)
Romantic Orientation: The Unattainable
Favorite color: always changing! Right now, yellows.
Time and date at the current moment: April 11, 2;28pm
Average hrs of sleep: 5
Lucky number: I don’t have one
The last thing I googled: red string necklace (maksyl people will get it, oy)
First word that comes to mind: family, because I looked up and saw a photo of my mom and uncle.
One place that makes me happy: my city, Chicago
How many blankets do I sleep under: 3
Favorite fictional character: Oo, that’s hard, a couple: Will Graham from Hannibal; Walter Bishop from Fringe; Buffy from Buffy the Vampire Slayer; Darcy from the book Pride and Prejudice; Scully from The X Files.
Favorite famous person: Meryl Davis; Chris Pratt
Celebrity crush: Chris Pratt, Jon Stewart
Favorite books: The Little Prince; To Kill A Mockingbird; The Secret Garden; the Edward Gorey illustrated version of War of the Worlds; Anne of Green Gables; The Shining.
Favorite animes: not really into anime, so just cartoons would be Avatar: The Last Airbender and Archer.
Favorite TV shows: currently - HANNIBAL its the best ever; So You Think You Can Dance
Favorite musician/band: The Beatles, Radiohead, TV on the Radio, Little Dragon are my top 4. The top 3 are constantly trading places with each other.
Favorite games: Grand Theft Auto series!
Last movie I’d seen in the cinema: Jupiter Ascending
Dream Holiday: I took it already! Eating my way through Italy and seeing art I studied as a kid. So on to the next- seeing the Northern Lights in person in all their amazing glory.
Dream job: own my own small movie theater I think, and have it be successful
Wearing right now: jeans and my “Do It For Chicago - Chicago Food Depository” t-shirt
Last book I read: The Count of Monte Christo (I’m not finished yet)
today is sick day and I forgot I got tagged for this by too-weird-to-ship so let’s do this okay?
i gotta pick a band for this thingy and answer in only song titles
Band I’m using: All Time Low (bitch u thought fall out boy)
What’s your gender: No Idea
Describe yourself: The Reckless and the Brave How do you feel: A Daydream Away (tired af) Describe where you live: Six Feet Under the Stars If you could go somewhere right now, where would you go:
Somewhere In Neverland Your best friend: Don’t You Go or Runaways or My Only One (ugh I don’t know I just love them a whole lot and hope they never leave me, plus I have more than one) Favorite time of day: Stay Awake (Dreams Only Last For A Night) If your life was a TV show, what would it be called:
Lost In Stereo or Running From Lions
Relationship Status: Break Your Little Heart To Live and Let Go, So Long Soldier, Forget About It (in that order, best friends for life still) Your fear: Something’s Gotta Give
well that was fun. I love it when you guys tag me in stuff like this, but I apologize if I take a while to get to it…
Hey so I was tagged by brosinlove thanks a lot Ily and sorry this is so late life has just been heavy lately.
Rules: repost and tag 10 people you want to get to know better
Birthday: Feb. 21
Star sigh: Pieces
Favorite color: black
Time and date right now: 9:28 April 3 2015
Average hours of sleep? Idk like 7?
Lucky number: 8
Last thing I googled: how to convert mass into weight (physics sucks man)
First word that comes to mind: what
One place that makes me happy: my room
How many blankets I sleep under: idk it changes a lot im weird
Favorite fictional character: Liesel Meminger or Max Vandenburg from the book The Book Thief by Markus Zusak
Favorite Famous person: Gerard and Mikey Way my babies
Celebrity Crush: I have so many omg
Favorite book: The Book Thief by Markus Zusak
Favorite Animal: penguin and Turtle
Favorite shows: The Office, Parks and Rec, Doctor Who and I’m currently watching Futurama and love it
Favorite musician/ band: A Day to Remember, My Chemical Romance, Pierce the Veil, Fall out Boy, All Time Low and P!nk she’s my queen
favorite game: this board game called King of Tokyo
Last movie I saw in cinema: I think it was Into the Woods
Dream Holiday: Germany
Dream job: current events high school teacher
Wearing right now: these amazing pajamas my grandma made me with this really cute kitty fabric
Last book I read: From a Name to A Number by Alter Weiner
So because it’s my break this week, I convinced my mother that we should watch Insurgent, and because she has not really watched many movies, she wasn’t able to understand why I was squirming on my seat during the whole time. You see, I don’t know if anyone of you has ever felt this the same way I did, but I feel really weird whenever I see Tris (Shailene Woodley) kissing Four (Theo James) while fighting against Peter (Miles Teller) because Shailene and Miles were very cozy and cute in The Spectacular Now. And even weirder is what I felt when Tris and Caleb (Ansel Elgort) are showing their sibling love by caring for each other because they were cozy and cute as well in The Fault in Our Stars. It’s just so weird, you know. You feel me, right?
And another thing, I have read the Divergent series, and throughout the story, I really, really, really hate Peter. Like, so much I have even attempted to stab a part of the book where Peter just annoyed me so much. But in the movie franchise, I found it really hard to hate him the same way I did on the books. Like, how can I hate Peter Hayes when it’s Miles Teller who is portraying him? I can’t hate him. UGH.