and ten bucks an hour

apparently Orchestra Hall is hiring bartenders, and I’m both qualified AND have their “preferred but not required” extra training…

I really didn’t want to get back into bartending, but fuck… I’d have to do a bunch of reading to refresh my memory on recipes, but it seems like a solid job. I might apply.

I Fuckin' Mean It.  (Carl Fluff)

Imagine: Babysitting Liam a year after Carl broke your heart the year before.. It’s hard enough to avoid him, as your neighbor. It’s only for a few hours right?

Note: I’m new to this!

Y/N was nestled on her porch swing, Her knees with drawn inwards as she swayed. It was uncharacteristically cool for the middle of summer. She was hellbent on enjoying every bit of it. She was halfway through The Great Gatsby, with no real plans for today.

“Fuck!” Fiona growled from across the street. She hastily snapped her phone shut before running a tense hand through her tangle of curls.

Y/N was no stranger to the notorious Gallagher clan. She had a fling with Carl shortly after she arrived to the neighborhood. It was short lived, as most young relationships tended to go.

Underneath it all, Carl was sweet. He’s the type of person that required a second look. They’d sneak out and sit in the van. His face would be inches from hers as they talked.He’d lazily throw an arm around her thick waist to yank her closer. She’d squeal at his sudden display of strength. “You’re fucking beautiful,” he’d growl in her ear. He liked all the things she tended to hate about herself. Carl made her feel like she could glow from the inside out.

But Carl was equal amounts of light and dark. When he was thrown in Juvie, she assumed they’d pass the year with notes and visits. Her young heart was overflowing with nothing but hope. Reality hit hard with his one and only letter to her. A wrinkled scrap of paper hastily shoved in an envelope.

“Don’t write. Don’t visit.”

Needless to say, Y/N was crushed. Carl wasn’t the boy that brought a hot blush to her cheeks anymore. He was another South Side boy consumed with greed and the need to prove himself.

It wasn’t easy to avoid him, when he got out early. She remained on good terms with his family. Whenever he came into proximity, she was out of there, like a shot. Especially with Dom right on her hip. Still, as she turned to go his eyes followed her anyways. It made her skin crawl. The last think Y/N wanted, was pity from Carl Gallagher.

Fiona’s voice roke her out of her daze. “Hey! Y/N!” She said jobbing over. “You busy?” She asked, nearly breathless.

“Naw,” Y/N said snapping her book shut.

“Uh, Ian really flaked out on me. He was SUPPOSED to watch Liam. He’s not answering his phone. I really gotta get to work. My boss is gonna have my ass if I’m late. You mind watching him? I’ll give ya ten bucks. Someone should be back soon. 2-3 hours. Max!” Fiona’s voice was filled with desperation.

Y/N chewed on her lip and nodded. She wanted to say no. She really did. Despite lingering embarrassment, she knew missing work was rarely an option when you’re poor.

Fiona groaned with relief and grabbed Y/N’s hand, tugging her forward. She rattled off the do’s and don’ts of babysitting Liam as the made their way across the street. Rules, she was vaguely familiar with. THe door slammed behind them as YN’s eyes fell on Liam. “Y/N!” He yelled before clinging himself to her legs. “Hi Buddy,” she grinned before picking him up for a hug. “You’ve gotten so big!”

Fiona glanced up before fishing a ten out of her purse and pressing it into Y/N’s palm. “You be good okay?” She kissed Liam’s cheek with an audible smack. He giggled and held Y/N closer.

“Stuff for spaghetti is in the fridge if he get’s hungry,” said as she slung her purse over her shoulder. “Thank you!” The door’s slam rang out through the oddly quiet house.

“What now?” Y/N said before ticking Liam’s hip. “Trucks!” He cried matter o’ factually. She set him square on his feet and nodded. “Alright than! Trucks it is.” He scurried around the living-room floor, collecting Hotwheels in his tiny hands.It’s been awhile, but not much had changed. Still cluttered. Still homey.

“Here!” He said thrusting a fist full of cards towards her. She sank down to the floor and followed Liam’s lead. The thing about playing cards is, explosions are a must. Or at least that’s what he had spent the last hour teaching her.  “Oh no!” She gasped. She feigned screeching sounds before pushing her car towards his. “Boom,” he giggled before running his car into hers. She sighed dramatically. “Ya got me again!” He gave her car an extra bump for good measure.

“Ya hungry bud?”

“Mhmm,” he mumbled absentmindedly.

She padded into the kitchen, poking around. She pulled a big pot out of the cupboard and filled it with water. She quickly chopped up peppers and onions before throwing it all in with the sizzling hamburger. Between the hum of the kitchen and the occasional noise from the living-room, she grew content.

“Hmm,” she mumbled as she sprinkled salt and pepper into the frying mixture.

Liam crept into the kitchen with a small pail of Legos. He He quickly got to work snapping the toy bricks together. “Oooh! Cool!” she said glancing at his newest creation. She snapped the jar of sauce open and poured it into the . She almost didn’t hear the door slam. Almost.


“Nope. Wrong Gallagher,” a familiar voice called out.


“Please be Lip. Please be Lip,” she mouthed silently. Her muscles instantly tightened as tension racked her entire body. She gave the sauce another stir before putting it on simmer.

“Uh, hey? What’re you doing here?”

Y/N tapped the spoon on the edge of the pan, shaking off the dripping sauce. “Um,” she stammered as she turned around. “Fiona had to go to work. Ian didn’t show up. So she asked me to watch him.”

They stood in silence awkwardly observing each other. Gone were the cornrows and baggy clothes. He was taller than last year. Arms had the promise of muscle from under his work shirt. He stared at her from under furrowed brows. She’d changed from the year before. He had a flash to the pudgy girl he’d sneak into the van to see. How good it felt to hold her. Kiss her. Naturally, he glanced at her chest. Shifting downwards he could make out the curve of her hips from underneath that sundress. Her curves, her curves, her curves. Even the thought of them caused  a lump in his throat. A mixture of guilt and lust.

“So…The spaghetti’s nearly done,” she said with a slight tremble. That’s somethign carle secretly liked. Her vulnerability. Not many South Side kids got away with that.

He nodded and sat next to Liam, feigning interest in his Legos.  He kept stealing glances at Y/N. The tension was thick in the air, but Liam was oblivious as he happily played.

“Need any help?”

“Naw,” she shook her head before pouring the noodles into the strainer.

“Smells good. I didn’t know you could cook,” he mumbled into dead air.

She chuckled and shook the strainer. Droplets of steaming water feel freely. “Yeah. Well, I’m a lady of many talents,” Y/N joked shyly.

“Look,” Liam said as he raised a mangled clump of Legos up.

“Speaking of talent!” She gasped. “Liam, you’re so good at building things,” she said warmly as she enfolded him into a quick hug. Carle missed the warmth in Y/N’s voice. The way she’d coo and purr in his ear, making him feel like the only man on the earth. “Fuck,” he thought bitterly. “I’m so fucking stupid.” He tried so harm to be what Dominique needed. Somehow he always came up short.

“Here ya go, Bud,” she said brushing his toys aside. She placed a bowl of pasta in front of Liam.

“Well,” she said straightening up. “I’ll leave you to it. Food’s ready if you’re hungry.”

“You’re going?”


She wiped her hands on a spare dish rag before tossing it onto the counter. “Well, she did say until one of you showed up.”

“You don’t have to go, Y/N. C’mon. Stay. Eat with us. Right Liam? You want her to stay, don’t you?”

Liam nodded, a mouth full of noodles.

She shook her head sadly before making a break for the door. Unfortunately, Carl was fast.

“Y/N,” he said as he caught her in the wrist by the living room. “C’mon. Stay. Please,” he begged.

She twisted her wrist out of his grip and turned her head away.

He shoved his hands in his pockets. “I’ve missed you.”

She snorted indignantly. “You’ve looked okay to me,” she said sitting on the arm of the couch.

“I fucked up. I know that. You know that. Okay? I’ve just-I’ve missed you,” he growled as he hastily sank down into the arm chair.

“If fucked up means writing that pussy letter. I’d say yeah, you did.”

“I was facing a year. I-I thought it’d be easier,” he said quietly.

Her lip quivered slightly before she blinked away the tears threatening to fall. She focused her attention to fidgeting with the hem of her dress.

“I’m glad it was easy for you, Carl. I figured it was a typical Gallagher move. Ya know? Pushing away anyone that could care. Really care. But-But you couldn’t even give me the time of day when you got out,” she said coldy.

“It’s not like you’ve been around Y/N. “GOD!” He groaned. “Anytime I get near you, you’re fuckin’ outta there.”

“Well, you got your wish Carl. You can’t have it both ways,” She hissed. “Expect me to come up to you and Dom? ‘Excuse me, can I talk to your boyfriend for a sec?’“ She mocked spitefully.

He’d never seen her mad before. Truth be told, he couldn’t decide whether her wanted to yell at her, or kiss her. Underneath layers of sweetness, she was fiery.

“Want did you want me to say? ‘Hey, I know you don’t want me but I’m in lo-’” She stopped short, realizing what threatened to spill out of her mouth.

Carl shoved himself out of the chair and slowly walked towards her. He stopped and positioned himself right in front of her. “Finish the sentence,” he urged as he stared down at her. His fingers lightly brushed above her knees, sending electricity throughout her body. She shook her head and sighed. “This is stupid,” she laughed. “Because if you think for one minute that-”

She was cut off by the familiar sensation of Carl’s lips against her own. He lifted her legs, urging them around his waist as he leaned down to deepen the kiss. Y/N melted completely into the sensation, grabbing a fist full of his wavy locks. She gasped as he pressed a firm kiss to her neck. She instinctively tightened her legs around his waist, pulling him closer. He gently nipped at her favorite spot. Right below her ear. The place only he knew about.

“Mmm, wait,” she purred. “Liam,” she said motioning to the kitchen.

“I thought about you the whole time, ya know.”

Her hands crept around his neck, as she looked up at him contently.

“In juvie, he continued. “Wondering if you were okay. I missed you. Now, I could give you a million bullshit excuses. But I just… I fucked up. And all I can say is, I’m sorry.”

She chewed on the corner of her lip as he considered his apology. He tilted her chin up as he went in for a kiss.

“Hey,” he whispered against her lips. “I mean it okay? Fuckin’ stupid to let you go.” He placed a soft kiss to the corner of her mouth. He traveled to her neck as he planted smaller ones along the way. Y/N’s breath hitched she felt his hot breath in her ear. “I ain’t even making that mistake again. I love you.”

Fishblr! Question time, what kind of stand are you using to support your tanks? Are you using wood cabinet stands, metal stands, dressers, shelves.. what? I need some ideas for a stand for my ten gallon and I don’t wanna spend a lot of money tbh

Ymir and Sasha, stargazing.
  • Ymir: *staring at the stars* Ya wanna know who's beautiful?
  • Sasha: *sighing wistfully, also looking at the stars* Mikasa
  • Ymir: *sighing also along with Sasha* Historia.
  • Sasha: ...
  • Ymir: ...
  • Sasha: ...
  • Ymir: Ya know it's Historia, fam.
  • Sasha: Mikasa's beautiful freck face, don't play.
  • Ymir: Ha, ha, ha. No, Historia is. Your woman is all buff and scary.
  • Sasha: She is beautiful and commanding, and Historia resembles a small child with breasts.
  • -
  • Historia: *squinting from a distance* Would you look at that 'Kasa, our idiots are arguing over who's beautiful again.
  • Mikasa: Sasha hasn't gone for the jugular yet has she?
  • Historia: *pulls out binoculars* No, not yet at least. Titans, I can hear them shouting from here.
  • Mikasa: Ten bucks says they'll get over it in a hour.
  • Historia: I'll raise that ten to a twenty with both of them fighting it out first.
  • Mikasa: Deal.
Friendly Fire - (Trixya) - (1/?) - spacespice

A ‘Grand Theft Auto’ AU in which Trixie and Katya are a couple of legendary cross-dressing criminals who come out of retirement to “reignite that old flame” and land themselves One More Score. Gonna be some super-charged, over-the-top, pulpy nonsense–from my id to your eyeballs.

A/N: After much internal debate, I’ve made the executive decision to use ‘he’ when they’re out of drag and ‘she’ when in drag. That’s just how it’s gonna be. From the game franchise, I’ve only pulled some locations, brand names, and car models. The only characters that’ll cross-over are a couple strippers and to be fair, they aren’t really *characters* in GTA anyway, so….

Keep reading

The last time I got tricked into giving a shit about a job, I wound up working a bunch of 14-16 hour days and basically keeping an entire facility in the black by the labor of one idiot, while the plant manager put in seven hours of hiding in his office and watching fuckin Naruto every day. I got paid ten bucks an hour for this.

Remember, kids:   It’s a trap.

Getting a Job part 2

Read part 1: Part 2

I looked at the screen of my phone. This seemed to be the address the man had given me, but I was expecting some sketchy neighbourhood. This however, was just the business center. I swear Madara’s building is, like, four blocks from here. I kept walking until I stood right in front of a building that seemed to be a cafe. It was called…

“Heaven” I read outloud. It didn’t look shady at all, but Heaven did sound like strip club. I would really stand out between those pole dancers. I am pretty good. I pushed the door open, ready to see people throw money on the stage while drinking their alcoholic beverages.

I blinked a couple of time. I couldn’t believe my eyes.

“Kitty, you made it!” The man who gave me his card walked towards me and instead of a handshake, he hugged me.

“K-Kitty?” I felt attacked. Had Shisui put me up to this?! Was this a test?! I looked around the cafe, but I didn’t see anyone that resembled any of my brothers.

“Yes, your name will be Kitty if you decide to take the job” He wrapped an arm around me. “Slim waist, you are a perfect fit”

“Perfect fit?” I asked, looking around this place. “Heaven…is a…maid cafe?”

“Yes! Exactly!” The man snapped his finger. “You will be a waiter, all you have to do is bring the food and beverages to the customers, have small talk and be cute”

“Cute? Really? I can actually be really sexy, did I mention I can pole dance?” I felt ignored by this guy. He gave me a tour around the place and introduced some of the people working there such as “Sugar, Cinnamon and Cookie” I could only assume it wasn’t their real names. We ended up at the back of the café, in his office. He pulled the chair out for me to sit and I did. I had to be honest. I was good if this was a stripclub, but…a maid cafe? It seemed more lewd than a strip club.

“So?” He asked, crossing his legs and winking at me.

“I don’t know, man…it is just not me-”

“You get paid ten bucks an hour and you can keep the tips…which is a lot-”

“You had me at ten bucks an hour” I said, “Where do I sign?” I asked, grabbing a pen from his desk.

The man grabbed a sheet of paper and before he could even go through it, I signed my name on it.

“So when do I start?” I asked, shoving the contract back.


“Yeah~” I stood up. “Walk me through it”

He stood up and grabbed something from a box.

“So your name is going to be Kitty, you are half-cat, these are your cat ears, your shoes and your uniform, you can get your tail from Foxy, he is the redhead, he will walk you through everything on the work floor, so please get dressed” The man put everything on his desk and just looked at me.

“Oh…OK!” I went to unbutton my shirt, but the guy stopped me. A blush was spread across his face and dollar signs appeared in his eyes. “Such a natural…there is a locker room next to my office”

I grabbed the clothes and nodded.

“Sure thing” I walked to the locker room, got dressed in the light purple, poofy cocktail dress with a navy stripe around the edge of the fabric combined with a dark blue apron that was tied around my middle and reached over my crotch. The dress had a purple bow on my chest and to top it all off I wore elbow high navy gloves.

I put my clothes away and looked in the mirror. Years of unnecessary leg shaving has worked so good for me. I put my shoes on before sliding my hand over my baby soft legs. Yup…baby oil made them soooooo~  smooth.

“Kitty?” I looked up. I felt kinda busted. I got up seeing a young man, not much older than I was. He had red hair and fox ears.

“You must be Foxy…but really, what is your real name?” I asked.

“None of your business” He said, frowning slightly. “Come with me” He demanded as he turned around. I saw a fox tail and I wondered where it was attached to. I could only assume it was a butt plug. How did he even walk with that?!

“Let me get your tail-”

“T-Tail?!” I spatted out, “Oh no, I am not going to wear a butt plug, I am a virgin!” I raised my voice, causing almost everyone in the cafe to stare at me.

“It is a belt, idiot” Foxy said, putting both hands on his hips, “You just wear it around your waist”

“Oh…oooohh~” I felt stupid now. “Was it weird of me to assume-”

“Yes” Foxy said. He indicated me to follow him and I did. He grabbed the belt for me with the black cat tail hanging from it. I put it on and it was the perfect fit!…oh…that was what the boss meant with perfect fit.

I followed Foxy the first couple of hours. Just accompanying him got me tips from these people. For no reason but walking around with Foxy and occasionally answering a question like ‘What’s your name? ’ and ‘How old are you?’.

So, it was time to do my first table by myself. I put on brave face and walked towards the table with four middle-aged men sitting there. I was holding my purple notebook and my pencil with the paw eraser on the end.

“Good afternoon, my name is Kitty and I am your waiter, have you made up your mind already?” I asked, faking a smile.

“You name is really Kitty?” One of them scoffed.

“Actually my real name was supposed to be princess…” I talked to myself, putting the eraser against my chin, “But for you it is Kitty” I said.

“Alright Kitty, I’ll take a margarita, just coffee for him and…” The third person put the menu down.  

“I take scotch”

“Ah, my daddy used to love a good plain scotch, would you want a Highland Park 12 Year Old or Johnnie Walker Double Black? They are different in price” I said.

“What does your daddy like?” He asked, nodding his head a little.

“Well, my daddy was a fan of Laphroaig Quarter Cask he use to say ‘This is the scotch-drinker’s scotch, a scotch that tastes like scotch’, it is not on the menu, but we have a bottle, so I can probably get you a glass for fair a price”

“Y’know, Kitty” He took his wallet and grabbed a fifty dollar bill, “See what you can get me” He said, holding it between his fingers.

“For fifty, I can get you an entire bottle? But I wouldn’t want you to get drunk” I said. The man whistled, looking at his friends. “Oh Kitty~”

“Yeah, who is supposed to notice me then? You think legs shave themselves?” I rolled my eyes, writing the orders down. “Fifty gets you a glass” I said.


“No, silly, two, one for you and one for me” I said, “Something has to get me going through this long day”

“Will you be joining me in a drink?” He asked.

“Hmmm…” I was thinking deeply, “Why the hell not? We are not busy today anyway” I said before walking away. I returned with their drinks before grabbing a chair.

“Cheers, Kitty” He said, holding his glass up.

“Cheers” I said, taking a sip before spitting it back in my glass and making a disgusting look. “Ugh” I wrapped a hand around my throat. That was disgusting.

“Ooh, this baby is strong” He said. I knew he was talking about his drink, but…he kept looking at me.

“Ugh, it has a disgusting taste” I got up, “I have to wash my mouth” I walked to the kitchen.

“Hey, what ya doing?” My boss asked.

“Washing the taste of disgusting scotch out of my mouth?” I gave him a questionable look when he handed me a glass of milk.

“This will do fine, now go amuse the customers” He said, pushing me back towards the table.

“Oh…you got some milk?”

“Yeah, milk with honey or something. It apparently helps” I wanted to take a sip, but it was one of those prank glasses that made me spill most of the milk over my uniform. I put the glass away and turned my head to my boss who put his thumb up.  

“He is picking on the new guy already” I muttered before looking at the sticky white substance over my chin, chest, fingers and lap.

“This is such a bad day for me…Foxy, can you get me napkin?” I turned my head to the redhead who looked rather impressed. I know…only I could make such a mess.

“No, no, you have made our day” I looked at the man holding his cellphone up. He was either looking for a signal or Beyonce was standing behind me and he was snapping pictures like a paparazzi.

My boss suddenly grabbed his phone and had this strict look.

“No pictures allowed” He pointed at the sign, “I will have to ask you guys to leave”

“What no~” I complained,”They are my first-” I couldn’t even finish my sentence when I saw all their eyes turned to me.

“You dirty Kitty, let me help you clean up” Foxy’s hands suddenly grabbed my shoulders. He then grabbed my arm and pulled me to the kitchen. I was expecting some sort of scolding because I messed up my first customers.

“You are a natural!” He said, squeezing my cheek.

“I-I did okay?” I asked almost shocked. Dude, I always messed up. I must be in some kind of alternative universe.

“No, you are perfect””  Foxy said, grabbing a napkin, “Let’s clean you up and prepare you for the next customers” He winked at me. I can’t believe…I was actually good at something.


I exhaustively dropped myself on the couch before taking a deep breath. It was soooooo~ busy today. I am wondering why it was always like that when I was working. I laid my head on the armrest before feeling a hand stroke my hair.

“Hey, otouto”

I raised my head by Itachi’s voice.

“How was work?” He asked.

“It was very busy” I said, putting my head back on the armrest. I was already two weeks in and I got promoted. Promoted apparently meant going from cocktail dress to navy mini skirt and crop top with an orange apron around the waist and stripes around the edges of the fabric. I guess I am…the head waiter now…or some shit.

But even though I meet a lot of strange people, saying strange stuff and giving me weird looks. All my co-workers called me a natural and a lot of customers seem to like me…I guess I am likeable person after all.

“How does going out to dinner sound? Are you up for that?” Shisui asked. “It’s just the three of us tonight anyway”

“Wonderful” Itachi said, his hand still stroking my hair.

“I guess” I said. Both of them remained quiet.

“You…you are willing to go out…instead of ordering take out?”

“Uhu, what is the big deal? You are driving and I am the one getting to drink” I raised my head, “Right?”

“First, he starts taking regular showers, then he started brushing his hair without complaining and now he is willing to go to a social place…what the hell did that diner do to him?” Shisui whispered.

“I know right…it is like they brainwashed him”

“Uhu” Shisui agreed with Itachi.

“I am right here” I stood up from the couch. “Let’s go I am starving”

We went to an italian place and naturally I ordered a pizza and just listened to Itachi and Shisui gossip about their co-workers like I wasn’t even there, but hearing them talk was quite amusing. It is like watching Gossip Girl or Meangirls.

“Guys” I interrupted them, “It’s ten o'clock and I have to go to work in the morning”  I yawned. “I am very tired”

“Aww, princess” Shisui turned his head to Itachi, “Isn’t it adorable how hardworking he is?”

“But…dessert…” Itachi had a pouting expression on his face.

“We have ice cream at home” I reminded them, my face leaning on my hand. I turned my head to the waitress. “Hey, can we get the check?” I asked. I turned my head back to Shisui who was searching his pockets. He looked at Itachi.

“I forgot my wallet” He whispered.

“I have mine in my coat…which is in the car” He said, wanting to get up to get it.

“I can get this one” I said, grabbing my wallet. “Oh, and…” I grabbed a twenty dollar bill and handed it to the waitress “Buy yourself something nice, cutie” I winked at her. A blush spread across her cheeks. I wanted to get up and go back to the car, but both Shisui and Itachi were giving each other weird looks. They had one of their telepathic conversations again.

“Did he just call her cutie?” Itachi knitted his eyebrows.

“Did he just sound like a fucking pimp?” Shisui nodded.

“Did you see the amount of cash he had? That is concerning, right?” Itachi raised an eyebrow before indicating to me.

“You think he is a stripper?” Shisui’s eyes widened.

“How else does he have so many one dollar bills?” Itachi looked worried.

“Princess cannot be a stripper!” Shisui had a panicking expression on his face.

“I know! My baby brother?!” Itachi had the same expression.

“Guys!” I interrupted their conversation. “I am just a waiter…I get tons a tips”

“Promise to the grave of our father that you are not a stripper” Itachi demanded.

I rolled my eyes at nissan’s words. He always thought the worse of me.

“I swear on the grave of my daddy that I am not a stripper” I chuckled , “And I am talking about the biological one”  

“Did he just make a sex joke?” Shisui asked.

“He did” Itachi confirmed, the serious expression still on his face.

“Come on!” I can’t believe them sometimes!

===edited by @failureoftheyear

Stood Up

My makorrasummerproject x Inspired by this post


“Hey, that guy at table seven has been here for like an hour.”

Korra looked up from the order she was putting into the system. “What, just waiting?”

Her coworker Jinora nodded. “I’ve asked him if he’d like to order about three times, but he said he’s waiting on a date. Apparently she had to work late and told him she’d meet him here.” 

Korra winced. “And he’s still waiting after an hour? Yikes, he must have it bad.” She looked over her shoulder. “Wow, he’s actually really cute.”

“I know right? Wonder what’s wrong with him that someone would stand him up.”

“Aw,” Korra sighed, and watched him for a minute. He was currently folding tiny origami frogs out of the napkins. He was on the eighth one.  “I don’t know, he seems kind of sweet. Dorky maybe, but sweet.”

Jinora shrugged. “If that’s your type. How long do you think he’ll stick around?”

“Well if he’s been here this long, probably ‘til closing.”

Laughing Jinora shook her head. “No way. I bet he gets the hint and leaves in the next hour.”

“You’re on. Ten bucks says he stays ‘til close.”

Keep reading

ok get this: my roommate has a friend neighbor who lynn told that the roommate, becca, wants me to clean her place for cash. cool right?

well i get over there and becca is like saying “oh sorry i didnt specify the time i have to take my dog to the vet right now later today work for you?” i said “yea sure” and shes also like “if you clean for a bit i can give you say like ten bucks for three hours,”

in my head im goin: wow what a ripoff artist here. but it gets worse. so i go home to my apartment which is literally accross the driveway and as soon as open my bedroom door, my roommate lynn is calling saying that becca had JUST snapchatted her saying that “wow i guess connor isnt coming over to clean : P ” and im like ??????? the fuck dog?????

anonymous asked:

Awwww, thank you Haley!!!! X3 Also, how you doing? Haven't seen you all that much as of recent! - TeFA

That’s cause THIS girl has a job now! ;D it pays ten bucks an hour, and I’m still getting used to it >~< but that doesn’t mean I’ve stopped anything I’m doing!!! still writing, and still drawing! ^^ I’m actually working on a surprise for everyone here as soon as I can finish it ;D

In other news, how have you been!?!? I’ve missed you SO MUCH!!

Okay, but seriously, we all need to watch the Wonder Woman movie when it comes out.  Even if you think it will suck.  Even if you really hate DC.  Even if you’re not even a casual fan of Wonder Woman (but, come on, you probably should be).  Even if you disagree with the casting or any other detail.

Because let’s be realistic here: Disney-Marvel is going to be paying attention to how well the Wonder Woman movie does, and if it bombs, they’re going to be just that much less willing to make any female-led superhero movies.  So if you’re a fan of Natasha Romanoff or Carol Danvers or any female superhero, you probably should watch the Wonder Woman movie.

Worst case scenario, you’re out ten bucks and 2 hours that you can’t get back.  In light of the big picture, it’s probably worth it.

Dynamics (So this is how it goes)  Part 2

Here’s part 2. I really didn’t expect this kind of response to it and I love you guys so much. Even the relentless anons in my inbox. Part 3 will be posted…not tomorrow lol. Link for the first part is below

Dynamics Part 1

Summer goes like this:

Jude and Gabriel officially become a couple  and Connor all out stops hanging out with them , because has anyone ever heard of the term “The Third Wheel.” Because that was what you could basically call the biography of his life at the moment.

So he begins to frequent a lot of parties with his teammates because Gabriel’s always over at Jude’s dorm now and he can’t stand seeing Jude look at Gabriel like he freaking hung the moon and vice versa. All the parties he goes too pretty much suck when compared to hanging out with Jude, but there’s alcohol and he has nowhere else to be, so Connor stays, but he’s not quite sure when long hair and short skirts had lost their appeal, so he spends most of the parties skillfully avoiding  the advances made by the numerous girls who try to throw themselves at him looking for a good time. Kind of like how he now avoids all of Jude’s calls and texts.

At the beginning of July he’d be heading off to a four week baseball camp and one of his closest friends on the team had invited him to spend a few weeks at his parent’s lake house before they headed to the camp. Connor declined, because all he really wanted to do, was drown in his self pity, and it was unfair, he thought, to inflict it on others.

After hours of trying to persuade him, Ryan exasperatedly gives up on trying to get Connor to come to the lake house. He looks at Connor’s pathetic figure, sprawled on his bed, and sighs loudly,

“Why don’t you just tell him you like him?” he asks Connor pointedly.

Connor, whose eyes are closed, precariously opens one eye, taking in the sight of Ryan towering over him, “What the hell are you talking about.”

Ryan ignores the staged ignorance, “For all you know he might like you back .”

Connor throws an arm over his face, “ I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Ryan pressed on, “What is it? Are you afraid to admit you’re gay or something? Because if that’s it, then let me just let you know that nobody, especially the team, gives a shit about your sexuality.”

Connor groans, “Oh my God. We are not having this conversation.”

Ryan rolls his eyes, picking up his jacket, “Fine, suit yourself. I’m just letting you know that you’re the cause of your own unhappiness.”

The door closed. Connor didn’t need Ryan to tell him things he already knew.

A failed confrontation:

He’s lying in his bed after an especially grueling night of partying and it’s sometime in the morning (he’d like to believe) and he’s hung-over. There’s someone ferociously banging at the door and Connor pulls his pillow over his face, hoping the person just goes away, but the knocking gets louder and he knows who’s behind the door.

He opens the door, not even bothering to acknowledge Jude in the doorway and he collapses on the couch, regarding Jude from his new vantage point. Jude looks annoyed and kind of angry but Connor’s head hurts too much to evaluate the situation, and  it doesn’t help that Jude slammed the door behind him when he came in.

“So you don’t answer any of my calls or texts anymore?”

It takes awhile for him to register that Jude is actually talking to him .

“Did you need something?” He asks tonelessly, because his head hurts and he really does not need this right now.

Jude’s a bit taken back by Connor’s cold response and he narrows his eyes.

“What is going on with you?”


“Nothing?” Jude says incredulously, “You’ve been acting like such a……. ”  and he closes his eyes and takes a deep breath, willing himself to remain calm and he rephrases, “You’ve been acting so weird for the past couple of weeks.”

“I’m fine.”

Jude’s patience is wearing thin and though Connor isn’t saying much, he’s becoming exhausted from this conversation.

“So that’s it?” Jude asks, “That’s all you’ve got?”

And Connor shrugs, because what is he supposed to say? Because he can’t say what he’s feeling because their (inward cringe) just friends and Jude is in a (sickeningly) happy relationship and he just wants to be left alone. 
But because he’s an immature ass, he asks, a little too snidely and a little too bitterly,
“How’s Gabriel?”
“What  is that’s supposed to even fucking mean!!” Jude exclaims, just barely hearing the contempt in Connor’s voice.
And Connor knows that he’s being unfair and childish, but he’s too stubborn and hung over right now to be rational so he just mumbles, “Nothing.”

Jude’s finished with this pointless conversation. “You know what? FINE. Whatever.” And he turns his back on Connor.

“Have fun on your camp,” Jude says before angrily slamming the door.

Connor sighs, rubbing his temples, and he kind of wants to cry, but he falls asleep instead.

Jude wants to pretend for just a little longer that he doesn’t know why Connor is throwing a silent tantrum, because he’s not ready to face that as yet. And though he’s shying away from the elephant that they both know is in the room , he’s still angry at Connor. He’s angry at him for not saying anything, and for just shutting him out. He knows it’s not a coincidence that Connor turns cold as soon as Gabriel comes into the picture but he’s still trying to wrap his mind around the fact that Connor may actually be acting like this because…….

And he really didn’t want to think about it now because for the first time Jude is in an actual relationship with someone who likes him just as much as he likes them. Connor didn’t get to do this to him now, because Gabriel was amazing, and sweet, and nice and……safe.

Connor leaves for his baseball camp in another state and Jude doesn’t give him the satisfaction of a goodbye. He wasn’t expecting one anyways. He’s not allowed to have his phone in the camp, so he wouldn’t know if Jude tries to text or call him (he doesn’t, but Connor still hopes he does even if he can’t see it.) At about the second week of  camp is when Connor really starts to feel sorry for himself and he misses Jude (God he misses him) and he really hates himself for being mad at something that he’s just making worse. It begins to affect his batting and the background music of his life is now the coach screaming at him to stop hitting like a fucking girl.

One of the guys in the camp manages to sneak his laptop in and he also taps  into the camp’s WiFi. So he charges ten bucks per half hour to anyone who wants to use it. Connor pays twenty for an hour and spends 50 minutes of it staring at a chat box, trying to figure out what to say to his best friend. 

He finally decides on a very elaborate I’m sorry, and hits send, praying that Jude isn’t online, but he almost immediately receives a response

You’re an ass.

And he smiles at that,

I know, he replies.

Before anything else can be said, his time on the celestial laptop is up but even as its being yanked away from him he’s smiling because he knows that for now, things between him and Jude are okay and even though he can still feel his stifled emotions on the walls of his chest, and he still pretty much dislikes Gabriel for basically existing, his batting the next day improves almost miraculously and the coach only curses him out once. You could almost say things are looking up.

. …………..

 Jude’s the one to pick up Connor at the airport and he tries not to laugh at the sign Jude is holding up to indicate  to Connor that he’s his ride.

The ass, it reads.

“Hey,” Connor says grinning.

“You would not believe how many men  came up to me as I held the sign, asking if I’m the transport their wife sent.”

Jude helps him with his bags and they head to the parking lot, and before Connor can ask whose car Jude borrowed, he sees Gabriel parked at the entrance of the airport. Jude’s wringing his hands nervously, and he shouldn’t have to apologize for not telling Connor that his boyfriend would be tagging along but he feels like he should. Gabriel smiles at Connor.

“Hey,” he says cheerily and Connor tries his best to return the smile. He silently throws his bags in the backseat and settles in next to them, feeling Jude’s eyes’ on him from the rearview mirror, but he just looks out the window and politely answers Gabriel’s questions about camp as they drive back to campus. Jude suggests enthusiastically that they should all go for lunch, and Connor wants to say that he’s tired and just wants to get to his room but he can see that Jude’s trying, so he decides not to be the bad guy today and they go for burgers.

They’re eating, and Jude’s telling some ridiculous story about his family’s last thanksgiving, and Connor’s heard it already but he still finds himself a little mesmerized by the way Jude tells the story with his hands and they way his lips move to form the words.

Gabriel tries really hard not to notice the way Connor is looking at his boyfriend.


“He likes you.”

Jude,  making popcorn, looks at Gabriel who’s looking for a movie to watch on the tv. He’s aimlessly running through the limited channels, looking for something  decent to watch and Jude’s a little confused.

“What? Who are you talking about?”

Gabriel’s given up now (college cable sucked), and he tosses the remote beside him, sighing loudly.

“Connor. He likes you.”

Jude brings the popcorn and sits on the couch trying to process what Gabriel is saying to him, not because he doesn’t know himself, but because he was hoping that he had a little more time before Gabriel caught on.

But he plays stupid anyways, “Of course he likes me, he’s my friend.”

Gabriel gives him a, “Don’’t play stupid with me” look.

“No friend looks at their other friend like that and wants to be just friends.”

“Connor’s straight,” Jude tries to justify.

“When was the last time he had a girlfriend?”

And Jude can’t really answer that question, because he can’t really remember when Connor last had a girlfriend, well after Daria. In high school, he mostly remembers it just being the two of them.

Gabriel nods his head as he takes Jude’s silence as confirmation. 

Jude’s getting uncomfortable and he doesn’t like where he thinks this conversation is going, so he picks up the remote as a distraction.

“Did you find anything to watch?” But Gabriel’s not done, and  his head is back, and he’s staring at the ceiling,

“No, I mean, he really likes you Jude.” Jude can feel his face turning red, and the tips of his fingers are white as he holds the remote a little too tight. He does not want to look over at Gabriel who is finally laying out everything on the table for both of them to see. Jude knew his boyfriend wasn’t stupid, and he knew this conversation was a long time coming but damn it, he thought he had had a little more time.

Gabriel finally turns his head to Jude, his eyes patient (they always were), it was something Jude loved about him, but at that moment hated.

“He likes you, and that’s okay, I mean, what’s not to like about you? You’re amazing,” Gabriel begins, “But I guess what I want to know is that, do you like him back?”

It had been eating at Gabriel ever since the day he and Jude had returned from their first date to see Connor sleeping outside Jude’s dorm. And he noticed little things too, like how Jude’s face would light up a little too much when he talked about Connor (which was a lot) or how Connor’s gaze would linger a little too long on Jude.

The question lingers in the air between them for a minute, and Jude wants to say what he knows what Gabriel wants to hear and Gabriel wants Jude to say no but the silence is the loudest confirmation of all and Gabriel nods his head and gets up from the couch.

“Okay,” he says more to himself, “Okay,” he repeats.

Jude hates himself, “Gabriel, I…”

Gabriel is walking to the door and he shakes his head, black curls bouncing sadly, “No, it’s okay. I get it.”

Jude knows he should get up off the couch and go after Gabriel, but he doesn’t.

Gabriel turns to him before he closes the door, the hurt evident in every contour of his face, and did Jude mention he absolutely hates himself?

“I just wish you hadn’t let me figure it out on my own. That you let our relationship play out even though you knew you liked him back.” 

Jude can’t deny any of it, as much as he’d like too and he hates that of all people he does this too, it’s Gabriel. Gabriel who doesn’t slam the door  in anger , but silently pulls it close, and all Jude can do is whisper, “I’m sorry,” to a bowl of popcorn.

He doesn’t realize he’s crying until he licks his lips and tastes the saltiness of his tears, along with the flavor of Gabriel’s lip balm.

Back Then - Chapter 4

Here’s Chapter 4, which happens to be one of my favorites. :)


Chapter 1

Chapter 2 and 3

Chapter 4: The Confession

Breakfast was a much less awkward affair then she had expected. There were some family members and friends wandering around, but she was able to sit quietly by herself and eat. She heard the others whispering in the other rooms, but couldn’t make out what they were saying. She wondered if Maks had told them to give her some peace and quiet. If so, she was grateful, because she needed it. Meryl finished eating and went to the sink to wash her dishes. 

“Absolutely not! Leave it!” Mama Chmerkovskiy, as Meryl came to refer to her in her head, came around the corner. She pulled the dishes out of Meryl’s hands. “You’re the guest!”

“I don’t mind. Really. I - …”


And that was the end of that. Meryl retreated to her room and saw that she still had half an hour before she could leave without being too suspiciously early to meet Maks. She picked up her phone and decided to call Charlie. 

Keep reading

I could write sensational sonnets ‘bout some of the riff raff than hang ‘round pizza parlors. I’m sure as hell not makin’ ten bucks an hour to listen the gripping tales of how Tweedledum and Tweedlemoron banged an entire sorority in a week. Someone, anyone, tell me where the goddamn intelligent life forms hang out.