and some of them live in florida

so in let’s play minecraft - most dangerous game x, ryan mentions that michael usually cleans the office, which leads me to this:

vicious, poster-boy-for-anger-issues, famous criminal michael jones who cleans up after everyone else in the crew in his typical angry way: by picking up their trash, storming into their various rooms, and throwing it about while yelling at them about “fucking being CLEAN, like fucking human beings, and not leaving shit everywhere like it’s fucking spring break in fucking florida or some shit, i don’t give a fuck, this shit’s been here for a WEEK because NO ONE FUCKING FEELS LIKE PICKING UP THE FUCKING LIVING ROOM ONCE IN A FUCKING BLUE ASSHOLE, NO, IT’S GOTTA BE FUCKING MICHAEL TO ACTUALLY DO SHIT WHILE EVERYONE SITS ON THEIR FUCKING ASSES AND SHITS ALL OVER THE FLOOR

gavin is the biggest offender when it comes to leaving a trash trail everywhere he goes, and squawks the loudest when michael is emptying the trash can out on his bed.

ray doesn’t give a shit, and usually lets michael rage around his room with red bull cans while he continues to play tetris on his phone.

everyone call tell when hurricane michael hits geoff’s room, because of the audible “oh, COME ON” and the various aborted attempts to reason with the lad as various gold-plated and pink-colored objects are smothered in fast-food wrappers.

as jeremy is rarely in his room — he can rarely sit still for long, preferring to be out and about, tinkering with the cars, or working out — he often has the unique opportunity to watch the hurricane building as michael plows through shared spaces, muttering to himself at increasing volumes, and as such usually slips out the door before michael has the chance to go off on him. ( mama dooley didn’t raise no bitch, but she certainly didn’t raise no fool. ) sometimes, he even plays the instigator before making his escape, sidling up to a murderous michael and asking with barely hidden glee, “whatcha doin’ there, buddy?” when the storm breaks — after jeremy’s out the door — michael just throws some shit into his room with an angry “not even FUCKING HERE” and moves on.

in stark contrast to the first few times this happened — during which she got just about as pissed as michael and would yell back at him — jack is utterly calm about it, and usually the last stop on michael’s route, because a) he’s usually almost out of trash at that point, and b) she just sits there with her arms folded and stares him down until he runs out of steam, and can always be counted on to help him pick up whatever’s left and follow up michael’s tantrum with stern warnings to the boys.

ryan is the only person who does not get affected by cleaning day, because he keeps fairly clean and michael knows it. this is not to say he’s immaculate: there are staggering amounts of diet coke cans left on the kitchen counter every day. but they aren’t left lying all around the house, and that’s what michael cares about. ( plus, every saturday morning, ryan washes out the soda cans and puts them in a bag for recycling, drives them out to a “can man” who weighs the bag and gives him money for the cans, and then donates the cash however he sees fit, usually to an animal shelter or buying a homeless person a meal. so the cans don’t remain in the kitchen for very long. he’s crazy, not heartless. ) and while his room is untidy as all get out — that’s where all the cans are strewn about — ryan tends to keep his mess contained and out of the general living space.

the one time michael did try to include him in the tempest, the can he was attempting to chuck at ryan’s head was suddenly impaled by a throwing knife. it was extremely sobering.

i may have lied. ryan’s not the only person to be safe from michael’s wrath on cleaning day. nobody pulls that shit on lindsay and lives.

Hamilsquad roomies

- nobody ever goes shopping until all that is left in the fridge is mustard and light

- John stays up all night playing video games and shouting at people on teamspeak

- which is why he has to make the others coffee every morning

- Hercules has contemplated moving out after two weeks of living with three guys with long hair (it’s EVERYWHERE IT’S LIKE HAVING FOURTY CATS)

- Lafayette listens to music very loudly and there is absolutely nothing to be done about it

- but he also always makes enough dinner for all of them so he is forgiven

- Alex and John had a light-saber fight in the living room once and that kids is the story of why the lamp mainly consists of gaffer tape

- Hercules just disappears ever so often to some place for doing stuff (nobody knows details, bets are on either supervillain or a secret wife and kids in florida)

- they live next to an older couple, he is a nice old boy, his wife is satan in the flesh - everyone agrees on that (including her husband, john’s sister and every uber in town)

- thursday night is movie night and it doesn’t matter if you got an exam tomorrow alex!

- the toaster is suspected to be a russian spy and is to be blamed for everything going wrong

anonymous asked:

MY ANXIETY IS TOO HIGH FOR THIS, PLEASE GIVE ME WORDS OF CALM, I HAVE PRESENTATIONS TO DO TODAY AND I WANT TO CRY

I am not going to be able to focus today and I have finals next week, thanks dan

for those who need it: whatever this video ends up being, dnp are happy and together and very fond of each other. they care about each other deeply and are in a very comfortable place in their lives right now. they just got back from a vacation that was lovely for them, during which they were able to experience beautiful views, go on dates to museums and gardens, take fashion risks, and generally be alone together in a gorgeous corner of the world they haven’t visited before. they’re about to travel again to florida and maybe they’ll spend some time with family before work stuff. everything is warm and comfy with them right now and we’re able to sense it more than ever as an audience. and i feel like, no matter what the video is announcing, it’ll be something that they’re excited about, which means, by extension, we will likely be excited about it. it will almost certainly be something good and nice and uplifting and that means that regardless of the details everyone will probs be v happy. no need for stress or anxiety :) 

ages ago @saintapathis tagged me in a rec-songs-for-moods meme and. it. got out of hand. so uh. some overly specific moods. some songs.

emotionally exhausted and in need of comfort:
- cobwebs, martha tilston and the woods
- born, over the rhine
- hold on, tom waits
- wild sage, the mountain goats
- drown out, the swell season
- his eye is on the sparrow, abigail washburn
- the party, regina spektor

sad-angry-defiant:
- this year, the mountain goats
- the mary ellen carter, stan rogers
- firefly, over the rhine
- shake it out, florence + the machine
- morning comes, delta rae
- that one specific live version of “like a rolling stone” at the end of scorsese’s dylan documentary no direction home recorded right after dylan’s motorcycle accident where he starts it by yelling to the band “play it fuckin’ loud” and the organ is just searing

depressed but don’t want to be:
- firewood, regina spektor
- a better son/daughter, rilo kiley
- level up, vienna teng
- amy aka spent gladiator 1, the mountain goats
- redeemed, charlotte martin
- i wanna get better, bleachers

sad but in a nice way where i want to wallow for a bit:
- knocking on heaven’s door, antony and the johnsons
- annachie gordon, the unthanks
- my body is a cage, arcade fire
- top of the world, patty griffin (especially the live at the artists’ den version)
- ring them bells, sarah jarosz
- on a sea of fleur de lis, richard shindell
- florida, patty griffin

i wanna yell and/or feel some kind of complex emotion:
- s.o.b., nathaniel rateliff & the night sweats
- changes come, over the rhine
- harlem roulette, the mountain goats
- forgiveness, patty griffin
- it’s alright ma i’m only bleeding, the duhks
- after the bombs, the decemberists
- the next best western, richard shindell
- empty, ray lamontagne

happy:
- pay me my money down, bruce springsteen
- the magic position, patrick wolf
- we need medicine, the fratellis
- banjo pickin’ girl, abigail washburn & the sparrow quartet
- you ain’t goin’ nowhere, glen hansard and marketa irglova
- i don’t know, lisa hannigan
- the night that paddy murphy died, great big sea
- call me maybe, carly rae jepsen
- upside down, paloma faith
- orphan girl, crooked still
- tea with cinnamon, katzenjammer
- don’t carry it all, the decemberists
- california stars, billy bragg & wilco
- everything i saw, the weather station
- literally any cover of galway girl

it’s three am, there’s a thunderstorm, and i’m wearing a lot of velvet:
- girls that glitter love the dark, hannah fury
- when another midnight, sarah slean
- bells for her, tori amos
- mad girl’s love song, fisher
- the devil, pj harvey
- i will never die, delta rae
- #1 crush, garbage (SHUT. YER FACE.)
- black doe, mary epworth and the jubilee band
- devil of mine, moulettes
- bone mother, the ford theatre reunion
- horse and i, bat for lashes
- clap hands, tom waits
- tristan, patrick wolf
- black acres, elysian fields
- rest in the bed, laura marling
- bad ritual, timber timbre

having an emotion about the x-files:
- you were a kindness, the national
- goodbye (this is not goodbye), over the rhine
- recessional, vienna teng

Two-Bit Head Canons

-He’s the kind of person who actually finds the aesthetic in clutter
-His mom once yelled “THERES SO MUCH TRASH IN HIS ROOM” and he responded “I CAN HEAR YOU” because he actually thought she was referring to him
-He’s the opposite of claustrophobic and when the house is clean it slightly puts him on edge

-He’s allergic to chocolate
-Doesn’t stop him though, he’ll still smash a whole chocolate cake
-He’s also allergic to cats and it’s the only reason he doesn’t have 50 of them

-He loves Mickey Mouse so much because he snuck into Disney land when he was 7 and the guy in the Mickey suit fended for him

-He used to live in Florida, some family issues popped up in Tulsa and that’s why he moved there
-He’s kind of afraid his mom will want to suddenly move back home even though they’ve been in Tulsa for years
-She knows how much the gang means to him and that he’s not moving out anytime soon so she’s not going to move

Castle Kisses & Princess Proposal

Words: 879
Tony StarkXReader
Request:
 “So like I have more… Are you sick of me yet ?? lol if so say when haha. Im going to DIsney in June and I can’t help but think of kissing Tony Stark in front of Cinderella’s castle.. the rest I leave to you as always. :)” tonystarksgirl


“We should take a picture in front of the castle with our ice creams!” You squealed as your boyfriend Tony Stark handed you a Mickey Mouse shaped ice cream bar.

“You’re insufferable, you know that?” He rolled his eyes before taking a gigantic bite out of one of his Mickey’s ears. It was the fourth day of your Disney World vacation, and overall Tony had been a good sport about adhering to your every whim thus far. Including, but not being limited to, Disney Bounding as your favorite Disney couples each day, taking pictures with nearly every character that you could find, and suffering through It’s a Small World for you.

“You were just saying how much fun you’ve been having!” You sighed. “C’mon, I won’t let them take a hundred pictures like they usually do.”

“I don’t know, Sweetheart.” He smirked. “You might want a few hundred pictures of this one.” You were pulling him by the hand away from the ice cream cart and didn’t notice him toss the empty stick from his ice cream away and carefully pat the pocket of his jeans.  You waved at an unsuspecting Disney Photopass cast member until they shyly walked over to you.

“Mr. Stark, Miss. [Y/L/N], is there something I could help you with?” The photographer was a younger woman probably not much older eighteen. She smiled sweetly at you both and waited for you to reply.

Keep reading

the thing that scares me the most about these power outages is whether or not i have enough downloaded fanfiction on my phone to get me through the storm

Top 4  scariest places to be 

1. Riddle House

The Riddle House in Palm Beach County, Florida, was actually a funeral parlor

The house was later on, dismantled and rebuilt in Yesteryear Village.

In the 1920’s the house was owned by Karl Riddle. However, the horrors was soon, to be discovered. When

a former employee was found hanging in a noose in the attic. His name was Joseph. Joseph for some odd

reason despised men and would constantly attack men that entered the attic. To this day men are not

allowed in the attic  


2. Stull Cemetery

In early 20th century

A small amount of people used to live there

Two of them was a son and a father they somehow died in a mysterious accident

They were buried in the farm field. to this day their death is still a mystery

Some years after their death a large amount of people were found murdered and hung from a tree  


3. Aokigahara, Japan 

This is the well-known suicide forest

It is said more than 50 people took their own lives here in 2010

There is an annual body hunt for those who are willing to go there

Visitors are advised to use plastic tape to mark their route and avoid getting lost.


4. The Island of the Dolls, Mexico

This island in Xochimilco is known for its odd forest

Where dolls appear in the trees it is said that

A girl once died there and it is her soul that keeps the dolls appear

.

tbh getting VIP Pit tickets was probably the best idea because like. All the shows I’ve ever been to was sit down section. Couldn’t dance. As…party sounding at the new album is if I couldn’t dance I’d lose my shit. I love love *love* dancing to live music and I’m pretty sure artists love seeing their fans dance too. (cover bands have thanked me (and my friends @windspinner  and @welcomedmachine I was with who aren’t in MD rn ;;) for dancing and how flattered they were that people were dancing to their stuff. Still Counting (cover band no longer around) and Telesma to name a few.. like Telesma is a Baltimore based band and I once got emailed they were doing a gig in Florida as some festival and so I went and they recognized me straight away and I was talking to them and they thanked me and I was crying happy like, it was “fall” of 2013 and I was so home sick and I was telling them it was like they were bringing a piece of Baltimore with them to Florida and I got hugs. ;;…


@greywindys THIS IS GONNA BE AWESOME. Anybody else going to the Maryland show give me a shout.

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@why-animals-do-the-thing On the subject of warmth for old cats, I suggested my mom get 16-year-old Merlin a doggie sweater. They live in Florida, but he is old and arthritic and it’s still too cold for him in winter. I gave them some tips about how to introduce the sweater to him, but apparently he took to it right away. He’s always been ten times more relaxed than any other cat I’ve ever known.

My DCP Tips!

Fall 2015 apps just came out, which means this is the last application season I have to sit idly through before I can apply for my next program - Spring 2016. Lately I’ve been thinking a lot about what I’m going to do differently on my second program, so I thought I’d share my ~*CP Knowledge*~ with those of you doing the program for the first time. I hope these help you on your Disney journey, but if you have any other questions feel free to ask!

1. Do your research. Before you apply, research all the roles and get a good understanding of each - don’t just judge based on your assumptions! Check what people are saying on tumlblr and YouTube and rank your roles based on what you think you will enjoy and be good at. Also, make sure you have good reasons for picking your top roles to show your interviewer that these are the best fits for you!

2. Pick the right roommates. It’s hard to find a perfect group of people to live with for 4-6 months on Facebook, so if you’re doing this make sure you want to live with these people! Get to know them by talking a lot, filling out and sharing roommate surveys, and make sure you’re all on the same page about where you want to live. My roommates became some of my best friends and I met them through Facebook, I promise it is possible to find amazing people!

3. Pack smart. Fun fact: it does get cold in Florida (just kidding, that’s not fun at all). And even if you are coming from 25 degree weather like me, you will quickly adjust and 60 degrees will feel freezing to you. Pack a good amount of warm and cool weather clothes. I only brought one pair of jeans with me on my program and I think I wore shorts less than 15 times the entire time I was there. Also, make sure you have good shoes that you can walk a lot in, my only warm weather shoes I brought hurt my feet so badly. Don’t make this mistake! And if you have a limited amount of packing space, don’t pack too many clothes, you’ll be working five days per week anyways.

4. Buy stuff when you get there. This goes along with the last one, but, again, if you have limited packing space, consider buying new things once you get to Orlando. Towels, bedding, toiletries, food, and cookware all take up a lot of space and can be bought fairly cheap at Walmart or Target. However…

5. Spend your money wisely. You will be tempted by the overpriced food and merchandise at the parks and resorts constantly, but don’t forget to be wary of buying things in the “real world” like food and clothes. For a lot of people, this will be the first time they are paying their own rent and buying their own groceries, so try to keep to a budget. It will really suck when all your roommates are planning to go out to dinner and you can’t go because you only have $10 in your bank account. The best way to do this is to buy cheaper food (or food that costs the same but will keep you fuller longer.. oatmeal > poptarts, multi grain bread > white bread, etc.) and bring your own lunch to work, or snacks to the park. It’s okay to go to an expensive dinner every now and again (I spent $80 at California Grill once, so worth it) and splurging on something at the parks, but don’t make it a habit.

6. Take advantage of cast member benefits. Speaking of saving money, as a cast member you get amazing discounts. 20% off most merch and dining, plus full service resort restaurants are 40% off for lunch (and some for breakfast). If your family or friends are coming to visit you can get discounted resort rooms and dining plans (I got my family one week at AKL for $1000 (regular would be ~$3000) and dining plans for $35/day.. regular $55). Also, be sure to routinely check out Cast Connections and Property Control (cast member only stores) where you can get insanely discounted merchandise. I have bought mickey ears for $1, a charm bracelet for $0.80, t-shirts for $5, and so much more. There are a lot of other random benefits for cast members, too. One night we got to ride Rockin’ Roller Coaster with the lights on and then watch Frozen at the Sci-Fi dine-in! Keep your eyes and ears open for these typed of opportunities!

7. Try new things. There are tons of things to do at WDW, try them all! Before I did my DCP I hated fireworks, but Wishes quickly became one of my favorite things to do. Even if you don’t think you’ll like it, try it because you’ll never know until you do!

8. Learn to love your role and location. I guarantee you there will be days when you HATE your job no matter where you work. So, I challenge you to find the best in what you do. I was custodial, and !surprisingly! I disliked taking out the trash and cleaning toilets, BUT all I had to do was remind myself I am working at the happiest place on earth and that I am making magic for thousands of guests and I started enjoying myself. Do your best and be grateful for your job. Just remember, every job has it’s ups and downs, it’s all about your attitude!

9. Don’t be afraid to call out. Keep your sanity and give yourself a day off from work once every now and again if you need it. I called out three times during my program, and I think it was necessary. Take the day off and relax, go to Universal or the beach - just don’t go to any Disney parks! (But remember: one call out = one point, three points in 30 days, six in 60, or nine in 90 = one reprimand. Three reprimands means you get termed)

10. Make a definitive bucket list and get it done! Whether it’s character meet and greets, foods you’re dying to try, or maxing out on Buzz Lightyear Space Ranger Spin (it’s possible!) you have time to do it all. The best way to accomplish the things you want to do is to write them down and start working on them immediately! If you wait, you will find yourself at the end of your program with way too much to do.

Good luck on applications, and don’t forget to have fun! FT&PD :)

Now I’m just imagining canon divergent verse where Florida lives. Wyoming still gets hired to take out Tucker but when he turns up to do the job Flowers is like “REGGIE. DON’T YOU DARE KILL MY TINY SON.“

“Oh. Butch. So. This is where you’ve got to.”

“Do I need to make some calls to Command, Reggie? And tell them what you’ve been getting up to?”

“No.”

“Are you going to stop trying to kill my privates?”

“Yes.”

“Good. Now come over here and give me a kiss. I’m happy to see you again.”

“Yes, dear.”

just a reminder that like 2 days after some nasty cishet joked about bringing a gun to pride, there was a mass shooting inside a gay club in florida. just a fucking reminder that your words have meaning and weight and that those “jokes” aren’t even remotely funny because we are literally still being murdered just for existing.

i’m so fucking done with respectability politics. as long as there are still cishets who want us dead i don’t want them near me i don’t want them in my spaces i don’t fucking care how much sexual or romantic attraction they do or do not feel, it’s genuinely dangerous it puts our lives in danger and our safety is more important than the feelings of people who want to exterminate us. get the fuck over it.

-s

anonymous asked:

Yo describe some California beaches because tbh it's rlly hard to compete with Florida

False. I live in Southern California (in the San Diego area) I honestly don’t know how to explain how amazing our beaches are but I’ll list a few so you can maybe google them! La Jolla Shores, La Jolla Cove, Del Mar, Torrey Pines. Those are a few of my favorite, I’m not sure how to describe them but we have great surf, clean beaches, amazing wildlife. They’re just all around great.

minor changes from canon in the gravity key au

since gravity falls is in oregon there would be some changes if it took place in florida

- dipper’s hat is a palm tree (his symbol on the zodiac is a palm tree; bill refers to him as palm tree)
- mabel doesn’t wear sweaters, unfortunately. it’s too hot. she does have hundreds of swimsuits and sunglasses though
- just for clarification i don’t want to change the pines’ last name because it would be too cheesy
- the name ‘pacifica northwest’ is a pun, however, since she lives in the pacific northwest in GF. i was thinking her name should be atlantia southeast in GK. her expensive mansion is right by the oceanside.
- wendy and her family are landscapers for palm trees and are in the industry where they ship around palm tree fronds in trucks (if you live in florida you see those trucks every day on the road)
- greasy’s diner is a waffle house
- the 'woods’ are actually just some swampy marsh area. lots of weird creatures live in there.
- jokes on you there are no hills in gravity key because it’s an island. however, by the main beach there is a boardwalk type thing and an amusement park.
- the mystery shack still sells weird shit but it has less influence from woodland creatures and more influence from weird subtropical creatures because a lot of them are very uncommon. also he might sell those bottled sands with a tiny starfish inside or something.
- mermando and mabel met easily and they didnt really have to part ways since he lives nearby. also mabel got to meet the queen of the manatees in person
- the bermuda triangle plays a bit part in this au. ford moved to the keys because that was the closest he could get to the bermuda triangle’s weirdness on land. he harnessed the energy and magnetism to strengthen the portal.
- the portal was still built underground, but not in the house’s basement, in a large underground spring/cavern. ford drilled a network to access it from the house and use it as a basement.
- also it’s kinda angsty because stan and ford grew up in a beach town and it feels like home to both of them but without having to deal with stuff that troubled them as kids like their dad or bullies

Some Santiago family headcanons

So after meeting Mr. Santiago and some of the stuff we’ve learned about Amy’s family, I’ve been brimming with headcanons so here’s a couple of them: 

  • Victor Santiago was an NYPD detective. He’s since retired and he and his wife (who was a nurse) have moved to Florida. 
  • The Santiagos were largely raised in New Jersey
  • Of the 8 Santiago kids, 4 still live in New York (and 2 of those 4 are cops)
  • The Santiagos all have favorite fonts: one brother totally claims Comic Sans is his favorite (it’s not but it drives everyone in the family crazy whenever he mentions it). Another two of them have the same favorite font, but the older one claims it’s his and they can’t both have the same favorite font, and it’s been a point of contention for years
  • With 8 kids, money was always tight so things like new school supplies were a splurge and were treasured. 
  • Report card day was one of the most intense days in the Santiago house, even for the Santiagos who weren’t particularly academically inclined 
  • Growing up, there was a week designated “Prank week” in the Santiago house. The only steadfast rule was that the parents couldn’t find out (they totally knew it was happening). 
  • Only Mrs. Santiago and the 3rd oldest brother are actually good at cooking. The others range from passable to actually banned from the kitchen and only allowed back into the kitchen to do dishes after the meal (Amy) 
  • All of the Santiagos are very competitive (especially around each other) and they’re basically all dorks in their own way

leafbladie  asked:

Do you know about this competition of putting as many spiders in your mouth as possible? I saw it on "Ripley's Believe it or Not", so it might be fake, but I was curious about how dangerous it is for the spiders and people involved.

Well, I wouldn’t doubt it being true, while its hard to show something like that on tv because thankfully people will complain about the animal cruelty. Most large spiders have fangs that can pierce our thin skin on the esophagus and mouth, and they need them to eat so defanging a spider is just torturing and dooming it.

Tarantulas have urticating stinging hairs on their body that they use for self defense, so swallowing those live would be a no go.

This isn’t the only time this has happened. Some idiot in 2012 died after taking part in a contest for a $860 ivory ball python in Florida. He had eaten more than 60 grams of meal worms, 35 three-inch-long ‘super worms’ and a bucket of discoid roaches. Now, he won those contests, and the insects were raised in Sterile conditions as food for reptiles, but the problem is that he ate some alive, and he ate a large amount at once, and the spines and hairs on the legs used to hold on and resist being pulled out of the ground or swallowed dug into the throat, resulting in many legs being lodged in the throat, causing him to choke on the cockroach legs, and he threw up, causing more legs to get stuck in the throat, causing him to asphyxiate.

Sadly he already had two poor kids and is unable to claim a Darwin Award.

Don’t be an idiot, kids.

Not petty, but industrial strength revenge. Do not f*ck with men with nailguns and plywood.

(warning: long post)

Okay, a little while back I was an HVAC technician working for a company here in the limp wang of the country, Florida.

While schlepping myself around repairing, installing, duct taping and in general making sh*t happen in a all together too sweaty living I’ve met many different kinds of people. Some love it when you show up because they’re sweaty and miserable and they know you’ll make them as frosty as an ice queen by the time you blow out of there; and others just f*cking hate you because you happen to be the avatar of their cheapness come to visit them in their hour of defeat.

Now when installing an AC system, legally, you need to have it inspected by the County or City Building Dept. Usually these inspections are cursory at best and a real bear if you’ve drawn a pissed off inspector. Or if not pissed off, someone looking for a bribe(this is Florida, bribery is a part of life).

This day I drew a man looking for a bigger than normal bribe. Typically, it’s $50. This guy wanted $150. Sh*t, my take-home on the job was only $200 and I wasn’t about to split that with an over-zealous a**hole with a clipboard.

I refused to pay and he struck my inspection card with the big red pen. This meant that he found everything incorrectly installed, even if he didn’t look. The miserable f*ck. This meant I had to reapply for another inspection at $100(the first one’s free). So this a**hole had cost me time AND money. This meant vengeance!

Keep reading

My first job was at a little pharmacy/gas station type store (only wet didn’t do gas). We had quite a few regular customers, most of which were pretty sweet, but I’ll never forget this one guy.
He came in all the time and would always flirt so blatantly with me. I was 16 at the time and he was at least 45. Minimum.
Obviously it tended to make me uncomfortable. Very uncomfortable.
Once he even brought me a necklace with handmade metal charms on it as a gift. But that’s not the story I want to tell you today. No, this is much worse.

After about 3 months working there, he’s fine in plenty of times and I’ve gotten pretty good at balancing between being polite and keeping my boundaries.
This day he comes in, gets his prescription and comes to me and asks for his cigarettes. As I’m getting them he makes some creepy comment about how my apron accents my waist nicely, already throwing me off. But then when I ring him up he asks if I surf. I lived beachside in Florida so I didn’t think much of the question and responded that I didn’t actually. He began insisting that he teach me how to surf and that he was so good at it. I tried to dissuade him by saying my dad surfs and could teach me, but he waves it aside and throws this at me.
“Me and a few friends are going to Puerto Rico next week to surf. You should come with us!”
I’m literally stunned into silence.
I manage to push out the fact that I’m 16, to which he responds, “that’s fine. Puerto Rico is pretty lax.” I’m freaking out. “And don’t worry about money, I’ll cover everything.”
After way too long a silence I hand him his receipt and insist that I’ll think about it, just to get him to leave.
The minute he left the store I went to my manager to tell him what happened and he handled it. Don’t know how, but he never came back, so that’s good enough for me.

2

some key west deer i met on holiday a while back. they only live on the florida keys and generally only grow to about 65-75cm tall but are a subspecies of white-tailed deer. due to close proximity to humans they don’t have fear towards humans and are often very friendly.