and shepards we shall be

Markiplier Theory: The Final Showdown

I think all these ego pop-ups / cameos (idk) are going to lead up to something big, and here’s my theory on it. (Buckle the fuckle up my dudes this is a pretty girthy theory that I hope you enjoy!)

We all know that the alter-egos (I’m calling them ‘ipliers’ to make it easier) are trying to take over mark’s channel hence the whole dark thing saying “How does this help us take back control? We’re the heart and soul of this channel after all.” These fuckos kNoW how much power they truly have over us I mean c’mon they would have probably picked up on it by now (and by they I mean google could have found it easy seeing as we were all and still are freaking the fuck out) and now they’re trying to steal the channel from Mark.

I’m stating this next sentence very loosely so just kinda ignore it if it makes no sense but: Maybe, they’re gonna pull and Anti and by ‘pull an Anti’ I mean they’re probably gonna find anyway they can to eliminate Mark and take over his channel, so probably killing him.

Ok the Anti thing doesn’t really make a lot of sense but let’s continue: We do know that they are trying to take control or to be ‘let in’ to be able to wield the power that Mark and his fans (us) hold could lead to chaos and they want as much of it as they can get.

Here’s how I see it: something bigger than just ‘Ooo evil yet hot characters coming back to be all evil and stuff, haha murder’ I’m thinking like a civil war type show-down. (Bear with me it may be completely ridiculous) i’ll leave that there for now cause I have other things to say.

Let’s examine the teams (if this is what I’m theorising)

Team Dark:

Let’s face it this is Dark’s team 100% will not share he is like a toddler with candy. Mark said it himself in a live stream that “ He’s a social manipulator. He is literally, 100% manipulative. He leads you into this false sense of security, and he wants you to trust him because he wants to take advantage of you.” He will legitimately do anything for you (“I can give you anything”) or, in this case, will literally do anything to make sure that the people on his side, STAY on his side and he’s willing to put up with it all to make sure he WINS.

Wilford: Well this should be pretty obvious: Will wanted famed way to make his mark (pun not intended) on the world, forget about all the murder and such (bUBBLES). He is an important ‘iplier’ and is obviously not new to the whole killing thing. Plus he is one of the oldest characters on the channel, revealing even dark himself, and if not contained he could become a deadly enemy. Which is why Dark wants him: (I’m sorry new darkstache shippers) to use him. c’mon do you really think that whole ‘Will’ thing was real? Pfft nO throughout the whole Dark encounter we see he’s barely keeping his calm. As Mark would say, he’s ‘cracking’ and is barely managing to keep up with Wilford’s shit because all he wants to do is take Mark’s channel and to him this is a complete wast of time. I’m also thinking that Dark is saving most of the gory details for when he’s closer to reaching his goal because Wilford seems more fixated on the tv show more so than the initial plan.

Google: Well I’m guessing Dark managed to convince him that the plan was to take over Mark’s channel and ‘destroy man-kind’ which just so HAPPENS to be his secondary objective which guessing by the “this deviated from our primary objective” Dark either messed with his programming or google just went full evil robot all on his own. (you do you boy, I’m proud) Also, who wouldn’t want a powerful murderous robot with a brain that’s literALLY GOOGLE ITSELF. I’ve made my case I think.

The Host: (personally one of my faves and I hope to see more of my son soon) well I’m not 100% sure what drives the Author/host (if you haven’t seen Mark legit confirmed they were the same person) but I’m guessing it has something to do with control (as in the fans) as in manipulations (his experiments) to see how far he could go to actually drive a person insane. Or he wants to write more books, who knows. But by the constant if almost forced narration is anything to come by he is very important and is either psychic (from other theories I’ve read, sorry can’t remember who but it was good) or can alter/shape reality by just talking which makes him very powerful.

Dr. Iplier: I have two possible Dark manipulation tactics Dark may have used. 1) He never really wanted to be a doctor but maybe parents forced him to (very loose theory here) but his true heart was in show business so like I’m thinking the opposite of Joey from F.R.I.E.N.D.S like the over dramatisation of the “I’m sorry. You’re dying” plus the inexperienced eye movement thing (which may have just been Mark fucking around. Probably the case tbh) or he just really wanted to act but never really knew how and was inexperienced so Dark promised him an acting job and judging by the “it wasn’t actually that bad, featured my ideas quite well” he probably doesn’t care / isn’t aware of the initial “end game” but is content where he is right now.

Ed Eddington: (really fucking last name that I can’t remember how to spell adoptalotakids???) he did mention it himself and I quote, “I know this is of topic, but I still need to sell my son.” He’s definitely aware of whats to come (well probably as much as Dark told him, which probably isn’t a lot tbh) but he ws promised he would A: sell his son and B: get a thirty second spot which is probably the only reason why he’s onboard.

Bim Trimmer: (I’m skipping silver sheppard and you’ll soon find out why) well Bim is probably only after one thing: fame and he’ll probably do as much if not anything he can to reach it and that makes him an easy target for Dark. He isn’t too happy about not being able to host that game show but I still think he’ll stay on board (for now anyways)

Silver shepherd: who could forget him? Well every evil super villain team needs a mole. Yes, I said mole and who better to be that mole then Mark himself. Let’s go back to that Cyndago sketch shall we? I think the silver Shepard is one of the only ‘ipliers’ that is ever referenced as mark himself. I know this is kind of a long stretch but Wilford himself confims it by saying this “it’s for everybody, not you” gestures to the Silver Sheppard as if to say “I know it’s you Mark, come on” which in return receives a double finger defence (signature move idk just wanted to put that there) and I’m pretty sure the rest of team (or a couple) know it as well but they’re keeping it from Dark for some reason. A back-up plan or escape route if it all goes to shit.

Septiplier: well maybe just Mark’s way of killing it forever or Dark promise to kill it or something. Sorry guys, Septiplier is dEAD once and for all

We’ve talked about the who now let’s cover the why, let’s examine this quote shall we? “So Completely unironically, Darkiplier is a completely separate entity from who I am. But, he admires what I’ve accomplished” there is no denying that Dark does in fact admire Mark’s work and al that he’s accomplished but not in the way that most people think. Dark isn’t some mega fanboy of Mark. No, he’s an evil version of Mark so the reason why he admires Mark and stuff is not because of all the good he’s done, it’s cause the channel itself could be seen as a power source, And Dark wants it. Badly. Seeing as he’s reappeared at least three times this year even. Going so low as to try and manipulate US for his cause because I’m guessing he’s been planning this for a long time and I’m sure he and the other ‘ipliers’ will make a reappearance real soon. As for why he’s trying to take Mark’s channel, I’m not sure. So for now, I leave you with this, Buh-Bye!

Red’s Rankings: Top 5 Mass Effect Fan Theories

5. Blasto was the Real Shepard

So let’s start with Mark Meer’s personal favorite, shall we? According to this theory, Shepard is essentially a fictionalized version of Blasto, and the events of Mass Effect are essentially fictionalized versions of the real Blasto’s adventures. Basically, a mirror of the “canon” such as it were. 

I kinda love this one for the sheer ridiculousness of it. And well…gotta say, it would explain why both Blasto and M!Shepard (who is the default in the first game) use the same voice actor, wouldn’t it…

4. Aria T’Loak is Aleena

BTW: I’ve already written at length about this one.  

I am aware that the writers all but confirmed this one. However, as I noted, they’ve deliberately avoided outright confirming or denying this one: we know Patrick Weekes headcanons it, but it’s not 100% confirmed as canon yet. 

The theory is that Wrex’s old mercenary buddy, the notoriously hard-to-kill Aleena, set herself up on Omega under the assumed identity of Aria T’Loak after escaping Wrex. I wish they’d just gone ahead and confirmed this one, maybe an easter egg in Citadel or something, for now I’m assuming it’s permanently locked in narrative purgatory where we assume it’s true but it’ll never be explicitly confirmed in-game. 

3. Eve Lied To and Manipulated Shepard

In one of the more emotional bits of dialogue in Mass Effect 3, Eve—the genophage-immune krogan female—tells Shepard about her first stillborn baby and how she almost lost all hope. The theory here is that Eve, in this instance, was deliberately lying to Shepard in an effort to manipulate them into feeling more sympathy for the krogan and, therefore, more inclined to cure the genophage. What is the basis for this theory?

It’s an inconsistency with the lore: krogan don’t give live-births. In fact, genophage or no, krogan females produce clutches of eggs, up to a thousand at a time—hence why krogan birth-rate is so high, krogans can have up to one thousand children in one batch. Although it’s possible when Eve references “a stillborn” she simply means that she produced a batch of eggs and none of them were viable, it’s certainly a very different image than the dialogue seems to be invoking. Is it possible that Eve, worried that Shepard, too, intended to betray the krogan, was cynically attempting to manipulate Shepard’s emotions with her story? Yes, it’s possible. Whether or not I believe it, is questionable…but it’s an interesting theory that could certainly change the implications of her storyline.

2. The Infamous Indoctrination Theory

This is the theory that everybody in the fandom has kind of a love-hate relationship with. We love it because it’s clever and actually makes the ending of Mass Effect 3…well, make sense. We hate it because we know that, no matter what they say, it wasn’t the developers’ intention, they just ran out of time, and it’s a more clever and subtle idea than Bioware would’ve actually gone through with.

The infamous Indoctrination Theory holds that the ending to the trilogy visually indicated (via colors) taking control of the Reapers as the “paragon” solution and destroying them as the “renegade” solution is because Shepard has become indoctrinated by the end of the trilogy. This isn’t unreasonable considering the context—the hazy, dreamlike imagery in the final confrontation between The Illusive Man, Anderson and Shepard and the amount of Reaper energy Shepard’s been exposed to throughout the series both support this idea. It definitely makes a lot more sense than the ending on its own does. I think it’s what @fandomfollowing would call a “honeypot” if it were in a different, for these purposes unnamed popular medium—we’re filling in the plot holes of the original media with something far more clever than the media itself presents. But, ah…we know nothing, ain’t that right, Johnny-Boy?

BTW: I’ve written my own analysis of the ending of ME3. I don’t think that my “analysis” is actually what the creators of the game had in mind, but I think that (as with the Indoctrination Theory) they accidentally created something…kinda brilliant. 

1. Nobody Actually Knows What the Asari Look Like

What do you know it, my favorite fan theory revolves around my least-favorite alien culture/race. This theory is based off of a conversation that can be overheard on Illium in ME2—if Shepard eavesdrops on the Bachelor Party, he’ll overhear a Salarian, a Turian and a Human discussing the Asari (a Salarian, a Turian, an Asari and a Human walk into a bar…shenanigans ensue haha). As the conversation goes on, all three speakers will express surprise that the other races find Asari attractive, because the Asari resemble their race: the Salarian thinks the Asari look like blue Salarian women, the human thinks the Asari look like blue human women, and the Turian thinks the Asari look like blue Turian women. Wait, how could this be? 

Well…the Asari do show something resembling psychic powers with the whole “mind-mating” thing, don’t they? Is it possible that the Asari passively (even unknowingly) use their pseudo-psychic powers to change how other races perceive them? If that were the case, then nobody (save for the Asari themselves) would know what the Asari actually look like—they’d all see, essentially, blue versions of their own race. A Salarian sees a blue Salarian. A Turian sees a blue Turian. A human sees a blue human.

Far-fetched as it is, it seems far more plausible than the Asari just so happening to coincidentally resemble ageless, beautiful blue human women, I’ll say that.

Another version of this theory is that while they don’t outright “shapeshift”, the Asari may passively manipulate other races to pick up on the traits where they most resemble them. So, a Turian would notice their scalps (which could resemble Turian fringes), a Salarian would notice their necks (which could resemble Salarian necks), and a human would notice their figures (which could resemble human figures), and each race essentially “projects” a face resembling their own race onto them.

All of this is based off of this one conversation.

I love it, personally. I feel like if this one was canon (and if some of the inconsistencies in the lore surrounding the Asari were actually, I don’t know, acknowledged and explained) I might be able to forgive how terribly written and thought-out the asari as a whole are? I don’t know!

So how about it, nerds? What are your favorite Mass Effect theories?

Oofah, that’s a good question. But I’ll do my best to answer it.

“And shepards we shall be,
For thee my Lord for thee,
Power hath descended forth from the hand, that our feet may swiftly carry out thy command,
And so we shall flow a river forth to thee,
And teeming with souls will it ever be,
In Nomine Patris, Et Fili, Et Spiritus Sancti.”

2. “Good. Bad. I’m the guy with the gun.”

3. “Huh, this is a new emotion for me. Pride in someone else. Unfortunately, it’s all overshadowed by all this UNYEILDING RAGE!!!!”

4. “Oh you know … a real fucking vampire.”

5. “When in doubt, kill it with fire.”

Saving the galaxy one facepalm at time.

ME3, is essentially a story of one woman’s insane quest to save the asses of as many “competent and important” men as possible.

Are you sitting comfortably? Shall we begin? 


General Corinthus: “Shepard, Shepard we can’t fix this antenna thingy! HALP?" 

Shepard: *sigh* "Yes General of the entire fucking Turian Hierarchy, I will help with DIY" 


Garrus: "Oh hey Shepard! Glad you popped by and were able to fix that tower!" 

Shepard: *growls* "Garrus you were here all this time?!?!? And the comm tower wanted calibration?!?!? AND YET I STILL HAD TO GO?!?!?!" 


Wrex: "SHEPURD! The Salarian and the Turian are being mean”

Primarch Victus: “Hey, he started it!" 

Shepard: *rage* "You are two grown ass men! SORT IT OUT!" 

Wrex: "But Shepurd :(”

Primarch Victus: “Yeah Shepard, I’ll tell on you to Garrus. He won’t be your friend any more!" 

Shepard: "We’re married you asshat! But fine lets me help you through this difficult relationship you two are having! If it shuts you the hell up”


Primarch Victus: “Shepard, my son, the son of the Primarch of Palaven that is, got his ass handed to him for trying to be clever. Do you mind popping off? Could do with a hand down there." 

Shepard: "And you can’t send the Blackwatch or something because…?”

Primarch Victus: “Reasons”


Wrex; “SHEPURD! Your son in in danger!" 

Shepard: "GRUNT NO! NOT MY BABY!… Though on second thought he is like 10 times my size and strength… Really?" 



Wrex & Co: "SHEPURD! We can’t decide what to eat for lunch, Mordin’s liver or eyes?" 

*Bakara and Shepard synch die on the inside* 

Shepard: "Wrex and other fellow idiots. GENOPHAGE TO CURE! Move it! Lunch can wait" 


Shepard: "In one fell swoop, I’ve just saved the Salarian Councilor from being made into a pin cushion, Commander Bailey from looking incompetent as fuck, saved the Citadel single handedly and stopped Kaidan from putting a foot in his mouth… Asari Councilmember person, can I have some troops?" 

Councillor Tevos: "Hell no, you have to earn it" 


*Quarians arrive on the Normandy* 

Shepard: "Let me guess Admirals, some important King of Quarians got himself marooned somewhere so I have to go get him or else we all fail?" 

Admiral Raan: "So insightful commander how did you know?" 

Shepard: "Just a fucking hunch" 

jail break

Shepard never expected guests anymore. She figured if her life were at all normal, she would have family that would come check on her, or a sane group of friends that could come make sure she wasn’t trying to break imaginary women stuck in putrid colored wallpaper. But no. She was Commander Shepard. Nothing was normal, and there were hardly visitors.

Aside from Hackett coming by a couple of times to tell her how screwed they were for when the Reapers did arrive, and Anderson offering some fatherly support, it was just her, and James, and a tiny little room overlooking Vancouver.

“Shepard,” James said, the doors popping open. “Change into something better for warmer weather and meet me downstairs. You’re getting out of here for a bit.”

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USS Caryl's 'Heaven, Hell, and everything in between Fanfiction/Fanart Challenge': Masterlist

18 submissions! Holy bonkers, guys! I see a ton of new faces up in there, including some golden oldies. Awesome! You guys never fail to knock my socks off - both participation and talent wise.

Be sure to stop by and give our lovely artists and authors some well deserved kudos and stay tuned for the next fanfiction/fanart challenge coming your way soon!

- first mate thereadersmuse


1) “Angels in Everything Part 1” by normyweather 

Rating/Medium: T, fanfiction.

2) “Angels in Everything Part 2” by normyweather

Rating/Medium: T, fanfiction.

3) “Angel’s wings” by ghostofjen

Rating/Medium:  T, fanfiction.

4) “I can make you forget (all the choas)” by wndrw8

Rating/Medium: M, fanfiction

5) “Untitled” by laelamcpittyart

Rating/Medium: G, fanart

6) “Heaven Knows” by soveryspooky

Rating/Medium: T, fanvideo/music video

7) “Untitled” by denoryl

Rating/Medium: G, fanart.

8) “Don’t lose faith” by terranakari

Rating/Medium:  T, fanfiction.

9) “Untitled” by whatzaisays

Rating/Medium: G, fanart

10) “Everything” by keepcalmcarylon

Rating/Medium: T, fanfiction.

11) “Annunciations” by chestertonsfence

Rating/Medium: T, fanfiction.

12)  “Untitled” by carolpeletier-for-president

Rating/Medium: T, fanfiction.

13) “Religious and a Little Mad” by searchingforpeter

Rating/Medium: G, fanfiction.

14) “And Shepards we shall be” by shepardmoreau

Rating/Medium: T, fanfiction

15) “Faded and Frayed” by boomboompants

Rating/Medium: M, fanfiction.

16) “Faith in Dirty Wings” by Bulletimescully

Rating/Medium: T, fanfiction.

17) “Searching” by kenzieboyd08

Rating/Medium: T+, fanfiction.

18) “The Business of Living” by ashippersheart

Rating/Medium: T, fanfiction.