In spite of everything I love
Harley Quinn but, damn, writers treat her so badly. I swear, the temptation to
make her actually stupid must be terrible because it’s so often implied, or
explicitly stated, that she slept her way through school. First of all, it
does not work like that. Second, she’s
not a therapist or a psychologist, she’s a psychiatrist, she’s a fricking MD
and a damn young one too. Managing pre-med and collegiate gymnastics that she
relied on to keep her scholarship? Harley is fucked up, but she’s not the dumb
blonde she plays. (also stop making her stacked, she’s a gymnast. she is 4’11”
of pure muscle and is not top heavy)
If you want a good Harley
backstory it’s simple. She’s ADHD but medicated and slightly robotic because of
it. I want to take special care not to demonize meds but, rather, people’s
disapproval of neurodivergence and a lack of focus on what is best for a
patient rather than what is most convenient for others. So, maybe, around ten
years old Harley is a hyperactive space cadet who’s brilliant at tests but
sloppy at coursework, who would be a gymnastics prodigy if she could actually
focus on technique and put in practice time instead of fooling around. Then the
meds come and it’s actually really cool because she can do the things she needs
to do instead of just wanting to do them, doing something else entirely, and
getting in trouble. People are proud of her, she’s proud of herself. But now
there are expectations. Family and teachers and coaches overschedule her, find
worth only in her success and don’t care about her mental health at all as long
as she’s performing and castigate her when she does fail. Fuck if you don’t
internalize that. But she doesn’t look unhealthy and she’s doing amazing. She
actually has to choose between the Olympic trials and continuing her grad
studies. She probably has some issues with self-harm but it either doesn’t look
like self-harm or is well covered up.
When Arkham accepts her, fresh
from her residency, it’s not a mistake. The woman is amazing. All they can see
is a mountain of achievements rather than the seething ball of nerves,
self-loathing, and imposter syndrome boiling just under the surface. That’s
when Joker comes in. He’s got the Hannibal Lecter shtick down. Where everyone
else sees an intelligent driven young woman he sees a frightened overwhelmed
girl who is working her hardest to convince the world she’s anyone other than
herself. Sending her into a nervous breakdown would be too easy so he doesn’t even
bother. Instead he’s open with her, almost friendly. The other doctors are
amazed, Harley is amazed, she’s not done anything particularly revolutionary
but, for the first time in forever, it looks like the clown prince of crime is
showing progress. He unravels her and it’s a challenge, she flinches back and
gets very serious when he comes too close to the real Harley under the
professional. Still, soon she’s questioning everything. She doesn’t even really
like her co-workers. She hasn’t had a real friend in years. She’s forgotten how
to have fun. Did she ever want this to be her life or did she just do it for
other people? It starts so slowly that it looks, at first, like she’s getting
better at self-care. Maybe something totally silly one weekend, a trampoline
park where she can enjoy the way her toned body moves without stressing out
over landings, a face painting booth at a street fair, some garishly colored
downright tacky decoration that clashes with her sensible apartment. Suddenly
she realizes how much she hates knowing the difference between cream and ecru.
The beigeness of her life is repulsive. She hates the person she’s pretending
to be even more that she hates herself which is really saying something.
After her weekend of freedom she
would have called in sick if it wasn’t so suddenly important to see him. The
relief she feels at talking to one of Gotham’s most infamous supercriminals is
disturbing but it is relief and she’s been swallowing a slow-motion panic
attack for hours. She admits, though she shouldn’t, that she took his advice
about doing something fun and he teases her, what would straight-laced Doctor
Quinzel do for fun? Did she realphabetize her sock drawer or buy a new
clipboard? It’s not important to impress him, it’s really not. He’s dangerous,
cruel, and he looks so proud when she admits that she bought a lamp shaped like
a lawn flamingo. The only mistake, he says, is that she should have stolen it.
She hopes the wicked thrill it gives her doesn’t show on her face. It does. She
almost even laughs. He likes it when he can make her laugh and she likes it
when he likes things.
It’s wrong and unprofessional,
the relationship she develops, and she knows it but her whole life she’s been
so high strung. Nothing she’s done has been for her, she’s not sure she knows
how to really do selfish things anymore, but he knows the selfish things she
needs to do. It feels good when she follows his advice even when it’s small
things like the rainbow striped socks she wears concealed under her very bland
slacks and sensible shoes. She’s so happy, almost giddy, and he loves her
happiness, he loves her, he loves the real her that she’s had to beat down and
hide for so long, the her that even she isn’t able to love. She is able to love
him, though, and since he loves her she’s able to love herself for him, to
protect and nurture something so important to him.
When the choice comes between
her old self, the tedious endless labor of making the world proud, and Him, the
spectacular man that brought color into her life, it’s not even a question.
She kills Doctor Harleen Quinzel, she throws away the version of her that let
herself burn just for medals and hollow accolades. She embraces Harley Quinn
and it’s so much a part of her nature she can’t even see that she’s still
living her life for someone else’s approval, except this time that person is a murderous
clown. She hasn’t let her hair down, she’s just put it in pigtails instead of a
hi guys so my girlfriend’s name is blue sargent and this is why i love her
she accidentally became a vegetarian she just isn’t fond of meat so she eats so much yogurt and salads and totally packs fruit kebobs for lunch,,, what a nerd
she has an emergency sewing kit
henrietta high school legend says if you say “blue sargent” and spin around three times in the girls bathroom she’ll walk out of the stall and have the exact right button to replace the one that got ripped off your sweater
literal embodiment of “aesthetic or die”, she’d choose overheating in the middle of a virginia summer over ruining her look
“blue you look like you’re gonna pass out”
"i’m sorry, i misheard, i think you meant i look fucking great”
her guilty pleasure is 90′s boy bands she loves *nsync and backstreet boys and totally knows all the bad dance moves from the music videos
she’s tone deaf though can’t carry a tune to save her life but sings loud and proud anyway
she has a gap in her teeth just big enough to be noticeable, it whistles when she’s trying not to laugh
she’s a mug hoarder that brings tea up to her room but has like twelve mugs on her window sill from forgetting to bring them back down
her dad’s a fuckin woodland nymph so she’s ridiculously good with plants and her vegetable garden is the envy of the neighborhood
she’s a dog person she walks dogs as a job because she gets paid!!! to spend time with dogs!!! she loves it so much
once whipped out her switch on a boy twice her size for catcalling and scared the living daylights out of him,, attitude makes up for height and this girl’s got plenty of it
she’s not a bad student but she does get asked to leave class for sassing her teacher’s or telling them theyre wrong
“[insert historical figure] was gay”
“ms. sargent please don’t”
“history is so fucking gay you don’t understand-”
“please sit outside for the remainder of class”
*cue deep dramatic sigh from blue*
the teacher called maura, who laughed her ass off and hung up the phone
she was riding her bike home one day and was late because she got distracted talking to a homeless guy while waiting at an intersection and she bought him some mcdonalds and played cards with him
LOVES stargazing so much, persephone taught her the constellations when she was little
when she misses her she goes and sits under the stars with smelly tea, wearing a pair of persephone’s socks. she feels closer to her that way and it hurts a little less.
the gray man didn’t teach her how to fight, calla did.
by the time calla is done with her blue can flip ronan on his back
speaking of ronan him and blue are best friends i don’t make the rules these are just facts
she has dream hair clips that change color
she sewed pockets into all his jackets for chainsaw
theyre combat boot buddies
she is Tiny and rides on ronan’s back or shoulders
she has literally taken a running leap and jumped on his back while he was in the middle of a conversation and he didn’t falter in the slightest
he rips up clothes for her so she can get that Punk Aesthetic
she gives the best hugs on the planet she is a tiny lady but will pull you in so tight and you can rest your head on her soft hair,,, wow
her nail polish is always chipped it lasts like an hour tops
there’s always kids running around the house and she is so good with them, playing tag, teaching them crafts and cool friendship bracelet patterns and she wears all the ones they make for her
you think ronan cusses up a storm? blue could give him a run for his money the girl’s got a mouth like a sailor
loves yoga but only knows like 6 poses that she does over and over, calla judges her
“blue why are you laying on the ground”
“im doing yoga. its called corpse pose. leave me alone youre fucking up my zen.”
corpse pose is a lie it’s literally laying on the ground
Head-canon that Ryder discovered if she/he wears socks, they can get a running start from their quarters and slide down the hallway in the Tempest. The many slips and falls attracts the crews attention, who are all fascinated and exasperated at this simple yet amusing activity. This leads to a contest to see who can make it to the far end d without slipping or falling, until Lexi makes everyone stop after Drack manages to put a crack in the Tempest wall.
things that have definitely happened at wayne manor:
Bruce came home one day to find that Damian had ducktaped Tim to one of the kitchen chairs and just left him. Both brothers have declined to comment on the situation. Damian is grounded.
Damian gets his languages mixed up when he’s really tired/not feeling well. Someone will ask him a question in English, and he’ll answer in Arabic, or Chinese, or sometimes Latin. Half of the time he doesn’t even realize his mistake and the other person is left completely confused.
Everyone has Pokemon Go. Steph, Dick, and Jason take it the most seriously, Tim only played until he reached level five so he could pick a team so Steph and Dick would stop bothering him about it, Damian’s only goal is to find and capture as many different Pokemon as possible, and Cass only plays rarely, when she’s bored and has nothing better to do.
Jason sometimes switches over to Spanish in the middle of an argument when he’s really fired up. If he starts yelling en Español everyone knows to immediately clear the area because he is Seriously Pissed. On a more cheerful note, he has Spanish nicknames for everyone.
Cass is a clothing thief. It’s not uncommon to find her lounging around the house wearing Dick’s T-shirt, Tim’s sweatpants, and Stephanie’s socks. She even has one of Jason’s hoodies. No one knows how she got it. Jason doesn’t even live with them???
Passionate arguments about what order the Star Wars films are meant to be watched in. Actual fistfights have broken out over this.
Tim has a lot of food allergies (I have so many allergy headcanons for Tim but anyway…) so he keeps a stash of “safe” foods. Except people keep eating all of his allergen-free snackfoods. Damian does it on purpose to get a rise out of him, but the others are just hungry and grab the first thing they see, which just happens to be Tim’s food.
Family board game night happened exactly once before it was banned forever. No one wants to talk about what happened.
“Dude, you can’t go out wearing that! There’s only room for one slutty sibling in this family, and I already called dibs.”
Stephanie technically does not live at the Manor but she’s there so often she might as well move in. She has a house key and keeps several changes of clothes in Cass’s closet. She may as well be a member of the family.
Watching alien conspiracy documentaries together is an approved family bonding activity. Sometimes Tim will invite Conner, who really gets a kick out of them, you know, since he’s a living alien clone conspiracy.
Batkids falling asleep in each other’s rooms because they stayed up all night talking and were too tired to walk back to their own bedroom.
(btw almost all of these are based off of things that have actually happened in my very large, multiracial family. I live in a sitcom, I swear.)
TalesFromTheFrontDesk: "My Son Got Sick In The Pool, So I'd Like a Refund"
Tonight started out like most Wednesday nights; ~100 check-ins that are 99% business travelers. However, a dreadful 3rd party reservation checks in with 5 adults and many, many kids. I let them know that there is a 6 person maximum to the room, and they say most of them aren’t staying. I allow them to proceed, since lots of people gather here (a hotel in the heart of downtown in a major city) for family dinners and such. Hey, maybe they’d get some revenue into the bar and restaurant area anyway. Immediately, I regretted my decision as the parents headed straight to the bar and the kids were left with the room keys and to unpack, wheeling the luggage cart recklessly through the lobby and screaming.
Later on I see that they eat dinner at our restaurant, which is a good thing. Figured they’d head to bed after that, because the kids looked to be between 3-6 yrs old. Nope. The entire party puts on their swimsuits, demands pool toys (which we do not provide to guests), bickers with me a bit because of that, then they were on their way to the pool. Not half an hour later, a woman approaches the front desk dripping wet (wearing socks that were soaked like she was wearing them in the pool too!!! who the F does that) and notifies me her kid “made a mess” in the pool, which I soon found out meant that he spewed (REALLY FRICKEN NASTY FLUID OH MY GOD I AM SCARRED HONESTLY) from both ends in the pool and on the pool deck. I knew we had to evacuate them to clean the mess in both the water and on deck, so I asked her to round everybody up. Cue her screaming at me that they were here to swim, rented the room to swim, so they would swim. Cue me explaining the grossness and safety hazard factor. Cue her telling me that I have the power to fix it in a way that they wouldn’t have to get out of the pool.
She’s screaming at me in front of all the guests in the pool area, so I just got my security guard and he yelled loudly enough to scare the people out of the pool so I could get maintenance in there to chlorine the crap out of the water and pool deck (they’d have to be out of the pool for 30 minutes). She makes a bunch of comments but gets everyone out. After she got dressed, she came to the front desk to complain. Immediately demanded a manager. I let her know that I am the manager on duty. She flips out about the pool situation, and then suddenly has a bunch of other complaints about the hotel/restaurant/bar that she never brought up in the first place (ughhsdlfkj), and started demanding an immediate refund in CASH for her room that she paid for through a 3rd party. I was so close to the end of my shift, and I was so at the end of my rope I had to go in back and let one of my coworkers take her for a minute so I could scream into a pillow. I just was not in the mood to take the heat for guests’ mistakes tonight and was so close to telling that lady to fuck right off. But I didn’t, and for that I am proud. WHY DO PEOPLE THINK THAT BELITTLING US WILL MAKE US DO WHAT THEY WANT. WHY DID SHE NOT UNDERSTAND THAT SWIMMING IN DIAHHREA AND VOMIT WAS NOT A GOOD THING FOR ANYONE INVOLVED. WHY DID SHE FEEL LIKE SHE COULD POSSIBLY BE REFUNDED CASH FOR A THIRD PARTY RES. I AM SO MAD AND I HOPE SHE IS MILDLY INCONVENIENCED EVERY DAY FOR THE REST OF HER LIFE.
TL;DR: woman’s kid gets nasty sick in the pool, she refuses to get her party out so we can clean it, demanded cash refund for 3rd party res. Made my life HELL.
They call me naïve. They ask why, why I believe in love with a woman I have never met, and why I chase after her if she’s so far away. They call me naïve, say I could have any girl I wanted. That I have a selection, a list to choose from, as if girls were some type of bargain shopping, some type of meat to pick from. They say girls come and go, that life goes on, that there will be more girls like her, more girls to erase the memory of her. They call me naïve, say I’m dumb for believing in a love story with her. They don’t understand that it wouldn’t matter if I had a millionaire woman, a model type woman, a giving-me-kisses-and-hugs-every-minute-of-the-day woman, a less stubborn, less stressed, less confusing woman. Call me naïve..but I want her and all her flaws, all her mood swings and “God, you’re so stubborn days.” They can call me naïve, say I’m wasting my time but they’ll never understand what she does to me. They’ll never understand that even though she’s 1,200 miles from me, she’s the closest to me that anyone has ever been. I’ve never been very talkative, yet one look from her makes me want to vomit every single thought I’ve ever had in my life; the good, the bad, and everything in between..because for once in my life, I know I’ll be speaking to someone that truly cares. And as cliche as it sounds, I never knew what real love was until I met her. It’s been a year since she came in my life, and I’ve only craved her more each and every day. I want her as she lays in my bed with my sweatpants on. I want her as she rests her head on my chest so she can inhale every last drop of my cologne. I want her as she tries to cook a meal, but fails because I interrupt her with random dancing, kisses, and food fights because she’s my best friend and I just can’t keep my hands off of her; so we’ll end up throwing the food away then driving to get carry out, while my hand rests on her perfect thighs while I’m driving. I want her because she loves nature and who doesn’t love a woman who isn’t afraid to join you and a group of friends on random Sunday morning hikes. I want her as she claims 75% of the bed, and leaves me inches from falling off. I want her and her constant mood swings, beer drinking, constant texting, and little fits. I want her 10 minute “hold me” cravings, just for her to push me off minutes later because she stressed out from school and feels like she’s suffocating. I want her drunken kisses and her 3 am “talking about life” conversations. I want her smeared makeup on my white t-shirts and her messy hair bun in my face every day of the week. They can call me naïve, but I swear I wouldn’t want any other woman. I want her as she declines drinks from random girls and guys at the bar, and I want her when her hands slowly make their way to my face as we kiss. I want her on nights when she puts on her cozy pjs or nights when she puts on her favorite outfit, ready for a wild night with her friends, while I sit at home and watch Netflix with our dogs. I want her scent on my car’s seatbelt, bed, or hoodies that she borrowed the night before. I would freeze in the cold to give her my last pair of socks, beanie, or jacket to wear. She could have my last crumb of bread if it meant she’d live an extra minute because I wouldn’t want to see a world without her. They can call me naïve but I promise you, I want no other, than her. They say, “nothing in life is certain, that the only thing promised in life is death.” Death is certain, and maybe a lot of things are meant to fall apart, meant to be temporary, but I know that one day I’ll die and she’ll still be the one I love, the one I’d give my life for, she’d still be my moon and sun, and that’s one thing I know for certain.
Can I request genderbent headcannons for Oikawa, Kuroo, Bokuto, Daichi, and Ushijima as females? Take your time if this might be a little difficult ^^;;
This is literally not hard for me at all I have already had these thoughts like HA DUDE - Admin Hope
Popular as hell
Tall as hell
Yet not very many curves to her, she’s only a B cup wears a lot of bralette
Kind of bitchy but yet everyone still seems to love her guilty as hell girls and boys alike
She doesn’t like getting compared to other people, but she can sometimes be really caring and compassionate (unless it’s to her little kouhai tobio-chan then its sass central)
Her public instagram is filled with very artistic photos and her finsta is all really dumb photos of herself, old memes, her nephew and stupid team photos
She hates snapchat but loves Snow; snow has more cute filters and way more but she only accepts people that she knows personally
She also has a tumblr where she is more popular and a twitter which also just for people she knows or any internet friends she would have made
Takes a lot of pictures of Hajime while she is changing and practically fawns over her muscles and ass
Has grouped Hajime more than one time which has lead to Hajime pulling Oikawa’s hair
Also very tall
Has huge boobs and a tummy to match them yet looks very proportional because of how tall she is, so no one really thinks all that much of it until they see her change
She still has the hardest time with her ‘bed head’ and she thinks that if she cuts it short she’ll be able to handle it more but it just made things worse
Basically pins back her bangs like 24/7 so she can actually see
Kenma thought it was dumb that she cut her hair and Kuroo mocked her about it
Literally the chillest person in the whole school, always helps the underclassmen find their class and if someone in her class missed anything she would give them her notes
Has a fucking study tumblr where all of her notes are like super neat and aesthetically pleasing and everyone always feels so blessed to copy from them
Has a summer job and all she does is buy office supplies and new volleyball stuff
Everyone want’s to be friends with her because she is just so cool
Probably plays the guitar
She’s chubby as hell but so flexible and moves so fast and has stamina for days
The sweetest peach and just wants everyone to get along
Probably already has some grey hairs from her team stressing her out, mainly Tanaka and Noya wanting to fight every man they come across or looks in their general direction
Gets really nervous when she is trying to confess to someone or really embarrassed when someone confesses to her especially when she talks to Yui
Gives the best advice ever and always tries to help her underclassmen as well as her classmates; always ends up getting teammates out of trouble
Yet also is really disciplined and likes to follow the rules herself at least
Her goal is to get into a good college with a volleyball scholarship
A very raspy voice for a girl but everyone else just thinks it really hot even though Daichi herself is a bit insecure about it
Probably one of those girls that wears her hair up all of the time because she doesn’t like the fact that it gets in her face but she never cuts it
Really good at braids
Chubby, Chubby, Chubby she is short and round and everyone loves her for it
She isn’t insecure in the slightest she loves that she is bigger than like everyone else
Has beat every single person in the school at arm wrestling even some of the teachers
‘Do you lift?’ ‘Yeah at least 90 pounds on each arm, I’m working on getting higher.’ literally everyone: :o
Literally the best hug giver ever, everyone loves Bokuto-chan’s hugs
She knows it’s against the rules but on valentines day a second year found her these really cute low rise maroon owl socks and she wears them like all of the time during school because she thinks they are really cute
Kuroo always gives her a running hug when they see each other at training camps and is still dazzled that Bokuto can manage to catch her
The cheesiest of cheesy pickup lines to everyone, and everyone just thinks she is the biggest nerd which wouldn’t be wrong
Sleeps only in the biggest T-Shirt she can find and always really cute underwear
It’s a riot at training camps especially when she refuses to put pants on right after getting out of bed
Akaashi exclaiming that she is going to catch a cold
Blunt but tries her best to be kind to to other people
Very fit and goes on runs every morning with her dog and stops to let people pet it
A resting bitch face but has the warmest smile ever and Tendou always exclaims that to anyone new that they may encounter
People think shes a bitch because of how blunt she is, and she gets a bit upset by it but her team reassures her that she isn’t at all
Has like a whole pack of hair ties and bobby pins for girls and boys to tie their hair back with whenever someone asks
Really likes scrunchies and has like a crap ton of them and also likes the fact that they don’t get her hair all tangled up or in knots
Paints her teammates nails after practice a lot, she’s really good at it and whenever she paints them it always stays on for like at least a week
Has a lot of flowers in her dorm room and works at a flower shop over the weekends and during the summer
Her favorite compliment is when people tell her she smells good, because a flower is her natural scent because she always has them around
Also carries around fragrance mists for other girls to use, she is basically that girl that has everything in her purse
Like need lotions? Go ask Wakatoshi. Need a tampon or a pad? Wakatoshi will hook you up. Need some gum or a mint? She’s got that too
I know requests are closed, but I was sliding around in my socks listening to music and then I wondered what it would be like if Dean walked in on the reader jamming out to HIGHWAY TO HELL in the bunker? If you can’t, it’s cool. Love you! 😘♥️😍- Anonymous
A/N: Alright guys thanks for being so patient with me. I’m finally getting back into the swing of things!