and she's a taurus like me!

the signs as powerful woman empowerment quotes (in honor of international women's day)
  • Aries:"I am a Woman Phenomenally. Phenomenal Woman, that's me." - Maya Angelou
  • Taurus:"A woman is like a tea bag; you never know how strong [she] is until [she's] in hot water." - Eleanor Roosevelt
  • Gemini:"A woman with a voice is, by definition, a strong woman." - Melinda Gates
  • Cancer:"Women’s empowerment can’t just be something that women are pushing for. It has to be something that we’re all pushing for" - Sophia Bush
  • Leo:"Think like a queen. A queen is not afraid to fail. Failure is another stepping stone to greatness." - Oprah Winfrey
  • Virgo:"Women are the real architects of society." - Cher
  • Libra:"We have to teach our boys the rules of equality and respect, so that as they grow up gender equality becomes a natural way of life. And we have to teach our girls that they can reach as high as humanly possible." - Beyonce
  • Scorpio:"Of course I am not worried about intimidating men. The type of man who will be intimidated by me is exactly the type of man I have no interest in." - Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie
  • Sagittarius: "I hope that girls, especially, will see the importance of having a sense of justice and a sense of what’s fair and what’s worth fighting for. They’ll see that they can be warriors and at the same time soft and feminine and deeply feeling, with all the complexities women have." - Angelina Jolie
  • Capricorn:"I just want women to always feel in control because we're capable...we're so capable" - Nicki Minaj
  • Aquarius:"It is my hope and dream that one day every girl will go to school without fear or intimidation, and they will learn and grow to lead our future generations - as doctors, politicians, teachers, sisters and mothers. On this day we stand together and continue to grow stronger. And we will stand together tomorrow, and every day after as well." - Malala Yousafzai 
  • Pisces: "The one thing I do believe as a feminist is that in order for us to have gender equality we have to stop making it a girl fight and we have to stop being so interested in seeing girls trying to tear each other down – it has to be more about cheering each other on as women." - Taylor Swift
“Won’t tell you that they are mad at you” squad

Aries, Cancer, Virgo, Capricorn and Scorpio

The signs as Michael Scott quotes
  • Aries:I'm not to be truffled with.
  • Taurus:Well, well, well... how the turntables.
  • Gemini:I understand nothing.
  • Cancer:I'm running away from my responsibilities. And it feels good.
  • Leo:I am Beyonce, always.
  • Virgo:I don't hate it, I just don't like it at all and it's terrible.
  • Libra:I'm not superstitious, but I'm a little-stitious.
  • Scorpio:I'm going to make this way harder than it needs to be.
  • Sagittarius:That's what she said.
  • Capricorn:You don't know me. You've just seen my penis.
  • Aquarius:I hate so much about the things that you choose to be.
  • Pisces:It's never too early for ice cream.
Six word stories
  • Aries:Torched the haystack. Found the needle.
  • Taurus:Wind blows. Sails fill. Journey begins.
  • Gemini:To be kissed by you. Wow.
  • Leo:Robs Bank. Gets away. Tells everyone.
  • Cancer:Moods change like the goddamn seasons.
  • Virgo:Standing alone. Hoping to be seen.
  • Libra:She merely smiled. His world stopped.
  • Scorpio:Do me a favor: love yourself.
  • Sagittarius:Turkey: stuffed. Us: even more so.
  • Capricorn:Lovers only when people aren’t watching.
  • Aquarius:Went abroad. Finally feel like home.
  • Pisces:Complicated emotions and danger for everyone.
the signs as poetic metaphors
  • Aries:Her eyes are a fire and I want to be burned by them
  • Taurus:She is a laugh in a sea of sadness
  • Gemini:Her soul is an eagle and I am begging to grow wings.
  • Cancer:Her very existence is music to me. She is the saddest song and the happiest song I've ever heard.
  • Leo:Her love is a spark and I'm begging to be ignited by it.
  • Virgo:She is a sea of words and how I long to read each and every one of them.
  • Libra:She is the storm and the sun all in one. She brings me summer rain and I love it.
  • Scorpio:She is the moon and the stars and her heart is a cage for my soul.
  • Sagittarius:A hawk with velvet claws. I am begging to be carried away.
  • Capricorn:There is a slowly burning fire in her heart and a pool of water in her head and earthy goodness in her feet while having the breeze in her voice.
  • Aquarius:She is risk and fire and she is burning me from the inside out but I love it and I want more. She sets me free in ways I didn't think were possible.
  • Pisces:She is the slight breeze on a summer day and a dip of your foot into the water. She is cliff diving and sitting at home with popcorn and your favorite movie. She is hot cocoa and iced tea at the same time.
texts I've got from the signs
  • aries:Ok don't rush I'm table tennising
  • taurus:it makes me happy because i have no love life
  • gemini:I got apple and cinnamon flavoured lemsip cause it's cold and flu season and I'm always a slut for hot medicated beverages
  • cancer:Night! Love you poodles xxx Oodles not poodles!! But poodles are nice too!!!
  • leo:its like a shitty soap opera
  • virgo:can you imagine me on a mountain bike? I would cause absolute carnage
  • scorpio:We'd have to ask her discreetly, I don't think she'd say yes to spying on her
  • sagittarius:Come hither moon child
  • capricorn:my entire life is a stoner cliché
  • aquarius:nah i was just being salty because it makes me feel good
  • pisces:IM. GOING. TO. GIVE. YOU. A. HUGE. HUG.
The Signs As Beautiful Lang Leav Poems
  • Aries:
  • If you love me
  • for what you see,
  • only your eyes would be
  • in love with me.
  • If you love me
  • for what you've heard,
  • then you would love
  • for my words.
  • If you love
  • my heart and mind,
  • then you will love me,
  • for all that I'm.
  • If you don't love
  • my every flaw,
  • then you mustn't love me -
  • not at all.."
  • Taurus:
  • Where are you?” She asked.
  • “I have been searching all my life.”
  • “Stop looking for me,” Love replied, “and I will find you.
  • Gemini:
  • "Her heart is played like well worn strings,
  • In her eyes the sadness sings,
  • Of one who was destined of better things"
  • Cancer:
  • "I loved you more than love allowed"
  • Leo:
  • "Her bow is drawn to worlds of dark,
  • where arrows spring and miss their mark—
  • she'll turn their heads but not their hearts."
  • Virgo:
  • It was a question I had worn on my lips for days - like a loose thread on my favourite sweater I couldn't resist pulling - despite knowing it could all unravel around me.
  • "Do you love me?" I ask.
  • In your hesitation I found my answer.
  • Libra:
  • What is she like?
  • I was told—
  • she is a
  • melancholy soul.
  • She is like
  • the sun to the night;
  • a momentary gold.
  • A star when dimmed
  • by dawning light;
  • the flicker of
  • a candle blown.
  • A lonely kite
  • lost in flight—
  • someone once
  • had flown.
  • Scorpio:
  • What was it like to love him? Asked Gratitude.
  • It was like being exhumed, I answered, and brought to life in a flash of brilliance.
  • What was it like to be loved in return? Asked Joy.
  • It was like being seen after a perpetual darkness, I replied. To be heard after a lifetime of silence.
  • What was it like to lose him? Asked Sorrow. There was a long pause before I responded;
  • It was like hearing every goodbye ever said to me—said all at once.
  • Sagittarius:
  • "Forget her tattered memories,
  • or the pages others took;
  • you are her ever after—
  • the hero of her book."
  • Capricorn:
  • "It's so dark right now, I can't see any light around me. That's because the light is coming from you. You can't see it but everyone else can."
  • Aquarius:
  • "To love is a dare, when hope and despair, are gates upon its hinges"
  • Pisces:
  • She lends her pen,
  • to thoughts of him,
  • that flow from it,
  • in her solitary.
  • For she is his poet,
  • And he is her poetry.
The signs as green day lyrics

Aries: I’m not growing up I’m just burning out

Taurus: Home is where your heart is but what a shame, cause everyone’s heart doesn’t beat the same

Gemini: Its something unpredictable, but in the end its right

Cancer: She’s all alone again, wiping the tears from her eyes, somedays he feels like dyin’, she gets so sick of cryin’

Leo: And there’s nothing wrong with me, this is how I’m supposed to be

Virgo: I’m a mess and you’re a work of art

Libra: Talk is cheap and lies are expensive

Scorpio: Shut your mouth cause you’re talking too much and I don’t give a fuck anyway

Sagittarius: Everything isn’t meant to be okay

Capricorn: Speechless and redundant cause “I love you"s not enough, I’m lost for words

Aquarius: Sometimes you’re better lost than to be seen

Pisces: Give me a long kiss goodnight and everything will be alright

The signs as meaningful Percy Jackson quotes

Aries: “Tell the stars Bob says hello”

Taurus: “Here was my own dad, telling me he was sorry I’d been born”

Gemini: “Don’t feel bad, I’m usually about to die”

Cancer: “It’s hard to enjoy practical jokes when your whole life feels like one”

Leo: “Let the world honor you, my Huntress. Live forever in the stars”

Virgo: “The world was collapsing, and the only thing that really mattered to me was that she was alive”

Libra: “You promised you would protect her”

Scorpio: “We’re staying together, you’re not getting away from me. Never again”

Sagittarius: “You must forge your own path, for it to mean anything”

Capricorn: “They send me a hero I can’t help… just the sort of person I can’t help falling in love with”

Aquarius: “I love you’ She wasn’t sure if he could hear her- but if they died, she wanted those to be her last words”

Pisces: “Maybe it’s okay to still be a kid once and a while”

the signs as damian wayne quotes

aries: “don’t patronize me or i’ll break your face.”

taurus: “i was expecting scary, not gay.”

gemini: “she’s annoying, may i cut out her tongue?”

cancer: “you’re meaner than i thought. i like it.”

leo: “that’s soooo incredibly interesting, i can’t wait to tweet it.”

virgo: “-tt-”

libra: “what do we look like, homicidal maniacs?”

scorpio: “really, grandfather? ninjas? i’m insulted.”

sagittarius: “finally. people trying to kill me. something that makes sense." 

capricorn: "don’t believe anyone over the age of thirty." 

aquarius: "as of now i’m a vegetarian. and this is bat-cow.”

pisces: “father. i imagined you taller.”

the signs as 2011 tumblr
  • Aries:"WHAT IS AIR"
  • Taurus:"let me tell yOU ABOUT HOMESTUCK"
  • Gemini:that picture of dean in gym shorts
  • Cancer:moon moon
  • Leo:"do she got the booty? she doooooo"
  • Virgo:"[character] is my spirit animal"
  • Libra:"nightbloggers or just the australians?"
  • Sagittarius:"the supernatural fandom has a gif for EVERYTHING!!!1!"
  • Capricorn:"do you love the color of the sky"
  • Aquarius:"i like your shoelaces"
  • Pisces:"swiggity swag what's in the bag"
“We all know that my writing falls into 2 categories... there is no in between.”~Taylor Swift
  • Cancer, Virgo, Libra, Scorpio, Capricorn, Aquarius:“You made a rebel of a careless man's careful daughter”, “I'll watch your life in pictures like...I used to feel you breathe”, “And you call me up again just to break me like a promise, so casually cruel in the name of being honest.”
  • OR
  • Aries, Taurus, Gemini, Leo, Sagittarius, Pisces:“#POP TART SQUAD 4 LYFE #cant find my chill ever #SHIFTY SWIFTY STRIKES AGAIN #food network is our friend #no its Becky #WHY CANT I EVER CALM DOWN”
the signs as things my mum has told me to stop saying

Aries: Can you do something for me? Yeah, just murder me. Right now.

Taurus: *groans loudly* It’s fine, I’m fine.

Gemini: Time to die!!!

Cancer: Don’t worry, I’ve already cried like 3 times today.

Leo: If you don’t mind, I’ll just go shove an entire cactus up my ass, thanks.

Virgo: It’s not me, it’s the damn system.

Libra: I’m too white for this shit.

Scorpio: Well fuck me right up the ass.

Sagittarius: Seems like death is upon us, friends.

Capricorn: I feel like death hahaha

Aquarius: I’m too sober for this shit.

Pisces: I can literally feel my brain melting out my ears.

the signs as broad city quotes
  • aries:why are we waiting for guys to come to us? did amelia earheart wait to be asked to fly around the world? definitely not. she asked. and then they said no. but she still did it.
  • taurus:i just degraded my friend for you and i thought we were gonna be paid!
  • gemini:i’m an adult and i’m responsible. let’s go get some candy.
  • cancer:look, don’t bully me, alright? i was cyberbullied within an inch of my life last night.
  • leo:am i thin? like, for a dog.
  • virgo:i was so worried i baked a whole cake. and then i ate a whole cake.
  • libra:my biggest weakness is that i lose my purse a lot. but my biggest strength is that i always get it back.
  • scorpio:no, you’re the fools! we are garbage people living on garbage island. who are you, joe main street?
  • sagittarius:i also have some business with the bank. i would like to cash these nickels, and i’ll have them in quarters please. thank you so much.
  • capricorn:no more cleaning up other people’s pubes and getting screwed by people that end up not having cancer. if anyone’s going to pretend to have cancer, it’s going to be me.
  • aquarius:i don’t know where my underwear goes. that’s why i’m always going commando.
  • pisces:i’m not over amy winehouse. it’s like, we knew it would happen, but we didn’t do anything about it. i didn’t
  • know her-know her, but i still miss her.
the signs when their crush says to them that he/she doesn’t feel the same

aries: looks calm but wants to scream

taurus: zayns (leaves the crush and doesn’t talk to him/her ever again)

gemini: “yeah okay. friends is ok”

cancer: cries at home

leo:  “no no, you misunderstood…i like you…as a person…you are a very :) nice :) person :)”

virgo: stays calm because it’s okay, friendship remains.

libra: “i didn’t like him/her anyway”

scorpio: “are you rejecting me? more like i AM REJECTING YOU.”

sagittarius: accepts the answer 

capricorn: “hahaha i was jocking :-)))))))))) of course i don’t like you either hahaha yeah haha”

aquarius: acts like she/he didn’t listen the answer

pisces: blocks the crush in every social media

Napoleon Dynamite for the Signs
  • Aries:"Tina, you fat lard, come get some DINNER!... Tina, eat. Food. Eat the FOOD!"
  • Taurus:"I could wrap you in some foam, or something billowy?"
  • Gemini:"Oh yeah? Who's the only one here who knows secret Ninja moves from the government?"
  • Cancer:"Kay, hold still right there. Now, just imagine you're weightless, in the middle of the ocean, surrounded by tiny little seahorses."
  • Leo:"LaFawnduh is *the* best thing that has ever happened to me. I'm 100% positive she's my soul mate. Don't worry Napoleon, I'm sure there's a babe out there for you too. Peace out."
  • Virgo:"It took me like three hours to finish the shading on your upper lip. It's probably the best drawing I've ever done."
  • Libra:"I see you're drinking 1%. Is that 'cause you think you're fat? 'Cause you're not. You could be drinking whole if you wanted to."
  • Scorpio:"Well, I have all your equipment in my locker. You should probably come get it cause I can't fit my numchucks in there anymore."
  • Sagittarius:"Napoleon, don't be jealous that I've been chatting online with babes all day. Besides, we both know that I'm training to be a cage fighter."
  • Capricorn:"They're pretty good, except for one little problem. That little guy right there. He is nipple number five. A good dairy cow should have, like, four."
  • Aquarius:"Last week, Japanese scientists explaced... placed explosive detonators at the bottom of Lake Loch Ness to blow Nessie out of the water. Sir Cort Godfrey of the Nessie Alliance summoned the help of Scotland's local wizards to cast a protective spell over the lake and its local residents and all those who seek for the peaceful existence of our underwater ally."
  • Pisces:"Well, things are getting pretty serious right now. I mean, we chat online for, like, two hours every day so I guess you could say things are gettin' pretty serious."
the signs as all time low things
  • aries:the poppin champagne dance
  • taurus:when alex was late to band call so they put him in a box
  • gemini:the underwear photoshoot they recreated but never posted the pictures for
  • cancer:"im making a fuckin speech"
  • leo:zacks afro
  • virgo:when alex fell off the stage and got a concussion
  • libra:dwayne mcgurten
  • scorpio:when rian met a girl wearing an all time low top at the cinema and she didnt know who he was
  • sagittarius:"you look like like a fucking anime character"
  • capricon:when jack couldnt find his mom at disneyland
  • aquarius:#YouCantHaveSwag unless youre me. assuming that SWAG is Sex With Alex Gaskarth
  • pieces:brian dawson
the zodiacs as things cumslutscootaloo says


Taurus: Salutations! I’m Drake, and I’m the nicest guy you’ll ever meet. 

Gemini:  So now what you’re trying to problemate me for this?

Cancer:  It’s you guys who need to chill all I want to do is reblog cute shit, but nooo I can’t even look at anything I like without someone attacking me for it.

Leo:  Try not to cut yourself on the edge.

Virgo:  I don’t find her personality particularly childish? Like she has a playful quality I guess, but then so do most ponies. I don’t know though, I guess I like how bold and brash she is, and her determination is also really sweet.

Libra: Argument invalid.

Scorpio:  Why do you idiots keep making stuff up.

Sagittarius: I’m not straight, I’m sapiosexual. Nice try.

Capricorn:  Anti-SJW, Anti Bullshit, Pro-Confederate, White Pride, Anti- Gun Control. Steven Universe and MLP Fan.

Aquarius:  Go harass those people instead of me, or are you just doing it because I’m a man?

Pisces:  I’m afraid your comment was irrelevant and unnecessary.

the last text i received from each sign
  • aries:i got a video of you running and i can't stop laughing at it
  • taurus:did i leave one of my socks at your house?
  • gemini:why aren't you responding to any of my texts?
  • leo:i love you. you know you love me, too.
  • virgo:that bitch stole my pencil
  • libra:she thinks she's better than me. she needs to think again
  • scorpio:i found a rare pepe
  • capricorn:i tripped on his foot today
  • aquarius:i'm so sorry
  • pisces:but cheese is so gross... do you know what they do to make it?