and she understood


“I think I’ve realised that for many years I felt it my responsibility to heal him, but in truth it’s maybe not my responsibility at all,” she says. “I never understood the rage and anger of my father, but understanding his loss of his sister in Joanne, this helped me understand more where his pain came from – and where my pain came from, because it came from him. I am who I am because of my family and I carried a lot of shame for a long time about being rebellious. But what I’ve realised is that the toughness in me is something that comes from what came before me, and everything my family and their family before them went through.”


At times she was known as Ararat, at others, Meru. When seen from Greece, she was known as Olympus, and in the time of Gilgamesh, she was known as Nimush. Her peak reached such unimaginable altitude that it could be seen from all the nations of the world, even those that were a hemisphere’s arc away. This summit was said to be the exact point where heaven and earth intersected, and as such, only the holiest among the living were allowed to climb her thousand faces.

At some point, she left this world to live among the asteroids. She saw them as her siblings, and they accepted her as their own, and taught her the freedom of weightlessness. “You are not held down by gravity,” they told her. “You are gravity.” She understood this in a way that only a mountain could, and transcended being a mere mountain. She saw that in space, she possessed neither a summit nor a base, and further, that she could no longer be climbed from any direction.

She was free.

Where she once stood, there now exists a plateau of naked stone, and upon its surface, a prophecy has been carved. It states that she will return at the end of the world, and at that time, she will join heaven and earth once more. This newfound union will be swift and decisive, and when it is over, only the few who are holy enough to climb her thousand faces will remain among the living.

Mountains and moons are closely related.

Some have speculated that she once stood among the Ripheans.

Others state that she was once one of Ymir’s teeth.

North of Reality is an explorable fiction space written by Uel Aramchek. You can receive these pieces overnight via email by signing up here. This is entry #245. Learn how you can receive secret stories via physical mail here.

Re-reading chapter 30 of my 2012 Raphril story “Afterglow” and was kinda sad I never drew a certain moment I loved from it, so decided to do it now. If you want to finish reading, please be aware it is NSFW…Just keep that in mind.

…  She didn’t even realize when her laptop was by her side and they were sitting closer than they’d ever been in proximate to one another before. This was before he’d even saved her from the Kraang base - a time in which she never fully understood just how much he’d mean to her one day.

“You’re right.” she laughed and the sound seemed to break whatever spell fallen over him. “Oh, I think you’d like this - check it out!” she continued, reaching for her laptop and placing a part of it onto his thigh. She felt how he flinched at her touch but he recovered quickly, gently grasping onto the other side to keep it level.

“What is it?” he asked as she opened her internet page and began searching for the right video.

“You’ll see.” she responded, opening up YouTube and pulling up one of their old concert videos she had discovered. Stealing a glance at him, he seemed a bit apprehensive and pulled away slightly from sitting too close to her. Not allowing his actions to bother her, she scooted even closer to him and she felt the nerves coming off of the turtle in waves; yet she ignored it. “Here it is. Check this out!” she announced, hoping the change in conversation would calm him slightly. 

Raph stole a glance of her from the corner of his eye before he scooted a little closer to her and looked down at the laptop. April wasn’t sure how to react to his close proximity but that didn’t mean she didn’t enjoy it. She noticed how clean he smelt, always picturing him to smell like sweat since he worked out so much, but he didn’t. He smelt like a fresh stream filled with clean water; it was unbelievably pleasant…

“Aw, hell, is this an actual concert?” Raphael mused, breaking April from her thoughts.

“Yep. Sure is.” she replied, smiling at his voice and the how he was obviously trying to cover-up just how excited he was. She half-listened and watched the video she made full screen but her eyes kept gravitating toward Raphael’s face and how bright his eyes were. She’d never seen him this way and it surprised her at how open he was being with her at this moment…she didn’t want it to end…

                                           (Keep Reading)

My group leader is a ball of anxiety disguised as a human. She’s also almost 60 years old.

So when she starts mini panics, I can literally see her brain going white. I remind her, “anshin anzen!”


Anshin anzen normally isn’t used in these type of situations. It is used as; secure, safety, safe. Like safe driving, secured home, no accidents, safe workplace, checked and tested everything under control, locked and secured.

But anshin 安心 means relief, anzen 安全 means safe. They are both beautiful words, and phonetically calming too.

When I first told her, she giggled. She knew it wasn’t the right place to use this term, but she didn’t correct me, she understood what I wanted to mean.

Anshin anzen is our inside joke now. I tell her once in two days. Today was one of those days too. Then she told me, “ I told about this to my husband that you remind me that everything is going to be alright. He told me, isn’t usually the other way around since you are the leader? We laughed. He started to calm me down like you do too, he tells me daijoubu, daijoubu(大丈夫).”

((I gulped my thoughts into my belly about how her husband is such an ass that he recently just started to tell her so. *cough*)) ANYWAYyy, putting old ignorant generation problems aside,

I’m happy to know that she finds chanting anshin anzen helpful. My soul warmed more to know that this has inspired her husband too.

I hope that I can continue to help people like this through my life. And I hope my drawings are helping out as same too.

ehe, yeah , winter is almost there like, western parts of this land is having snow right now. I’m working on orangebat (*´꒳`*) also kindaaaa wanna sneak in a little hannigram.


Parallel scenes

I thought the scriptwriter and director have done a fantastic job in drawing parallel scenes to bridge the characters’ feelings and to contrast the characters’ behaviour:

Ep 6 - Soo: I protected what I wanted - Soo cut her wrist to stop her marriage to King Taejo and she told Court Lady Oh that she had no regrets as she had protected what she wanted.

Ep 11 - Lady Oh: I also protected what I wanted to protect -  Court Lady Oh sacrificed herself to save Soo from execution and she comforted Soo with the same words.

Ep 4 - Soo: I understand you - So was trying to scare off Soo by telling her he killed someone at the stones towers. Soo calmed him down by telling him that although he will not be forgiven for his sins, she understood his feelings. This is a place where you have to kill or be killed.

Ep 13 - So: But I thought you would understand - So thought he had killed his brother Yo as a traitor and he went to Soo for comfort. He repeated what Soo had told him many years ago.

Ep 12 - Soo: I will not be waiting - So was sent away by King Taejo as punishment for helping Soo. Soo’s inner dialogue to So’s departing back: I will not be waiting. I am afraid every time I see you. Even if I have another man in my heart, but why can’t I ignore you and send you away easily? Showing her inner struggle and dilemma

Ep 16 - Soo: I will wait for you - So was sent away by King Yo to build new palace. So had just left without saying goodbye to Soo after a painful breakup. But this time, Soo had made up her mind. She is now 100% committed to So.

Ep 13 - So: I will become king - Yeon Hwa waylaid So leaving the palace and asked him to become king. So’s reply: If I become king, will the heart I so desire become mine?

Ep 13 - Wook: I am going to become king - Wook waylaid Soo leaving the palace and asked him his intentions. Wook’s reply: In order to protect those I love in this palace, I am going to become king. We know that’s bullshit anyway.

(Mini Series) A Guy Walks into a Bar: Chapter 9

Chapter 9:

The better part of a week passed without seeing each other. Blake made his way back home to Oklahoma for the weekend and Miranda was left to her own devices.

Wednesday night, she warmed up for a Hank cover band, her first show since moving to the city. It put two hundred dollars in her pocket, less than she would’ve liked, but she understood she had to start somewhere.

Thursday she was back in the bar. It was a quiet day until five o'clock rolled around and everyone started piling in after a long day at work.

Miranda was starting to pick up on some of the names of the regulars. Porter was one of Blake’s friends, but he didn’t like the rest of Blake’s friends so he liked to come on Tuesday nights when they were all busy. Harley was another buddy of Blake’s, but he was just a follower.

When Blake wasn’t around, Jake was the leader. Miranda had kicked him and two others out of the bar earlier in the week for fighting and hadn’t seen him since.

Regardless, after texting each other everyday, Blake and Miranda were still on good terms, and he understood that it was just her job and she didn’t hold any grudges against him or anyone in his circle.

Miranda was stocking the ice chest with more beer when Jake came waking up. She tried not notice his toothless smile or the way he plunked himself down on the old barstool across from her.

“The usual?” She plucked a light beer from the cooler and was ready to pop the top when he spoke up

“A guy can’t walk into a bar just to have a quality conversation?” He sucked the only teeth he had left and Miranda rolled her eyes.

“Not usually.” She wasn’t going to insult one of her most frequent tip givers, so she was willing to suffer through a conversation with him. “I don’t see anyone around here for you to talk to.” She grinned a grin that some would deem as flirtatious.

“I’m actually looking for Blakey.” His obnoxious drawl put an emphasis on Blake’s name in an effort to insult him behind his back. “You seen him lately?”

Miranda looked into his squinty green eyes and watched him wink.

“You have, haven’t you?”

“I’m sure whatever he told you isn’t true.” She turned back to load a case of beer into the cooler in preparation for happy hour.

“Aw, he hasn’t told me nothin’.” Miranda was internally grateful for that. “Which is a surprise. If he got his hands on somethin’ like you, he sure as hell wouldn’t be keeping his mouth shut about it.”

Another wink sent chills down Miranda’s spine. She was immediately uncomfortable and wanted this conversation to be done with.

“Pretty thing like you, one could assume-”

“No, one can’t.” Miranda cut him off. “You want a drink or not?” To keep talking to her, Jake nodded. She popped a top on a bottle of beer and slid it in front of him.

“Blakey, though,” he smiled again. “He gonna be coming in here telling me to get my ass to the bank or what?” Miranda shrugged and went along with it, knowing there was some kind of joke coming.

“Oh, and why would he be doing that?” She turned around to pluck a whiskey glass off the shelf when another regular stepped through the door. An older man made his way to the bar and grinned when he saw his drink already being made.

“Hundred bucks says he couldn’t get you crawlin’ into his bed. Keep you up all night sayin’ his name, if you know what I mean.” Miranda stopped pouring the whiskey and set the bottle down so hard it nearly broke. When his face scrunched and a cackle sounded, she felt a hint fire ignite in the pit of her stomach.

“Excuse me?” Jake grinned at the way her whole body tightened up at the mention of her in bed.

“You tell me. Do I owe him?”

“You bet?” Her pencilled eyebrows perked.

“You don’t catch on quick, do you?” Miranda wanted to break the bottle in front of her and use it as a weapon, but something stopped her. “You think Blake woulda hauled your little ass around town if there was nothing in it for him?”

Miranda was quiet.

“What’s wrong? Shy all of a sudden?”

“You’re so fucking pathetic. All of you.” She grumbled, glaring across the bar at the little group that gathered around the pool tables every Thursday night.

“You’re saying that-”

“You’re disgusting. That’s what I’m saying.”


“No, you listen. You can go to fucking hell, and Blake will meet you there.” Almost like magic, when she said his name, he came walking in through the old wooden door. He folded his hands over his mouth, blew into them, and rubbed them together to warm them up from the cool autumn air.

When he saw Miranda, he smiled. It took him a second to read her expression. It was one he hadn’t seen before. Jake saw her gaze narrow on the door, and he was smart enough to make his way over to the pool table, far enough so he was out of harm’s way.

“You alright? Look like you’re ready to kill somebody.” Blake barely got his jean jacket draped over a barstool when Miranda started in on him.

“You made a bet with your friends to see if you could get with me?” If half of them weren’t drunk already, she would’ve had the attention of the whole bar. Blake’s face went white. His eyes drifted over to his friends where Jake was watching intensely.

“What’re you talking about, Ran? I-”

“Don’t call me that,” she cut him off before he could explain. “Only my friends call me that.”

“Did something happen?” Blake didn’t take her anger seriously. He was nervous as hell and let out a breathy chuckle to try to break the tension.

“Your fucking hillbilly friend just told me everything. You only took me out so you could get laid, just so you could get a hundred bucks?” She pointed at Jake, Marvin and Harley who were all waiting for Blake to show up.

“Miranda, I can explain. Just give me a chance-”

“It’s all a lie isn’t it? Everything you did, you were thinking about the money.”

“I wasn’t, I swear.” He tried to get a word in, but she wouldn’t let him.

“Thanks, Blake. This is really what I needed.” She plucked a rag from the bottom of the sink and wiped down the bar top that was already sparkly clean. “After all the guys that’ve fucked me over, I really need you to do it too.”

“Miranda, I didn’t mean to. They made the bet before I even knew you, I would never-”

“You did it for the money.” Her eyes were welling with tears of anger and her voice was teetering. She swallowed her emotions before anyone could notice they were there in the first place. “You’re a lowlife piece of shit just like all your friends.” She shot a look at Jake, wanting to smack that smug look off his face.

“I swear to God, I’m not.” His eyes widened as he stared into hers. “I swear, Miranda.”

“Fuck you, Blake. Just go.” While she slammed a bottle of tequila back into its place on the shelf behind her, Blake stewed. She didn’t even make eye contact when she strutted around the bar and cleared four empty bottles left behind by a couple guys who had already come and gone.

“Jake, what the fuck!” Miranda jumped at the boom of a holler, seeing a barstool go crashing to the floor out of the corner of her eye.

“Blake, no!” She dropped the bottles on the table and stopped him before he could wrap his hands around his friend’s neck. “You’re not going to fight here.” She held two hands on his chest to keep him from going anywhere while Jake shuffled across the bar, staying as far from Blake as he could without looking like he was a chicken-shit.

Blake’s face was beat red, veins were popping out of his skull. He struggled to take a single breath, fuming and ready to kill.

He looked down at Miranda and let out an uneven breath, glancing away immediately when he saw her broken eyes staring up at him. He took a step back and ran his hand over his face in an attempt to gain his composure.

When his eyes locked with Jake’s, another wave of anger swept through his body. He sidestepped a couple chairs and his large hand found the cue ball on the pool table. When he wound up and chucked the weighted ball across the bar, Jake ducked out of the way.

Instead of hitting his friend’s temple, the ball crashed into the wall behind the bar, shattering the entire mirror lining it.

The whole room fell silent, eyes fluttering between the shattered glass, an angry Blake, and a bartender yet to prove she could handle the job.

“Go,” she spoke through her teeth when Blake looked at her.

Miranda pointed to the door, angling herself so Blake would have to go through her to get to his good-for-nothing friend.

“You just wait till I get my fucking hands on you.” He spat in Jake’s direction and kicked the leg out from under a chair before finding his jean jacket on the floor and storming out.

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Not Again

Elate Week Day 5 - Loss || Regret; I can’t do that again. I know I promised no more angst but….. yeah here we are.


“Elena. What’s wrong?

“I can’t do this, I can’t handle you leaving me again.”

“You know I wouldn’t”

“But how do I know that Nate? Last time you ran back to me you left, again.”

“I’m sorry ‘lena I -”

“I can’t do it again Nate. Goodbye”




Nate started at the dead phone in his hand and considered redialling before shooting down that idea. Elena’s words echoed in his head and he understood what she had tried to tell him, don’t come back into her life. So Nate left it, slipping the ring off his finger one night when he had too much to drink at Sully’s. Of course he didn’t notice the host carefully locating and grabbing the silver band before slipping it into his front pocket.


Head pounding and heart racing Elena was wearing a striop into the ground. God she was an idiot for ever falling for him. She couldn’t even say his name without tears threatening to fall. Half of her was expecting the phone to ring and Nate to come running back to her but it remained silent as the forest.

She got a job offer in Yemen the next day and pushed all thoughts of Nathan Drake far away.


“Is this Elena?”


“Sorry dear, I wouldn’t be asking this of you if I had any other cause but… Can I come over? I have no other contacts in Yemen and may of got myself into a bit of strife.”

“… Sure Sullivan. Any company?”

“Just me darling”

“See you soon Sullivan”

“Goodbye Miss Fisher”


Seeing Sully wasn’t half as bad as how she thought it would be, especially since he bought donuts. Elena flung her arms around him when he pulled them out and he chuckled kindly.

“I don’t want to leave my host with nothing”

“You didn’t have to”

“It’s the least I could do” Elena was struck by how sincere Victor was. She hadn’t considered the fact that Sully might still care about her even after she left Nate.


“I know Elena that things between you and Nate were awkward at best near the end and that me being here is hard on you but I consider you just as much as my child as I do with Nate. You deserve someone who loves you and can be with you, not the other side of the world.”

She had been drinking with Silly months ago when he admitted he saw her as a daughter but Elena had thought that his feelings had disappeared when she left Nate. Apparently not. She swallowed and murmured her next words against his chest as he pulled her in for a hug.

“Thank you Victor.”


She regretted leaving. Victor would bring stories of Nate and what he was doing, eyes slight with pride and grief at the same time. If Elena needed someone to cry on Victor was there, armed with alcohol and tissues.

“I miss him” Victor just pulled her closer and tightened his grip on her.

“I do too ’lena”

Kiss Cam

Violet may not be much of a sports fan but she was rather of the opinion that if someone invites someone else to a game, especially for a date, they shouldn’t ignore their companion the entire time. Violet sighed and attempted to watch the game, even though she understood basically none of what was happening on the field.

The players left the field and the between inning entertainment started up again. Violet watched along with the crowd as various couples were subjected to the kiss cam. Violet’s mouth dropped open though when she realized the camera was pointed at her. She nudged her date and, typical, he ignored her. With a sigh, Violet turned to her other side.

Oh, they were cute. She smiled prettily. “Want to kiss?” After receiving an affirmation, Violet leaned in to kiss the attractive stranger, much to the delight of everyone watching her on the big screen. Take that, douchebag. Maybe next time you won’t ignore your dates if you don’t want a stadium full of people to watch your humiliation.

Violet kept kissing the stranger. What the hell, she thought, and slipped her tongue into their mouth. Violet moaned into the kiss as the stranger turned out to be a great kisser.

After a few minutes, Violet finally pulled away. She looked at the stranger, her date forgotten.

“Wow. That was…”


positive lady characters meme
catelyn stark + strengths and flaws (asked by holyathenas & anonymous)


2x19/6x08 parallel So basically I just wanted to show you that. Tell you–tell you that I couldn’t have done it without you.”


the stages of being a poussey fangirl


But let there be spaces in your togetherness, and let the winds of the heavens dance between you…Sing and dance together and be joyous, but let each one of you be alone. Give your hearts, but not into each other’s keeping…and stand together, yet not too near together: for the pillars of the temple stand apart, and the oak tree and the cypress grow not in each other’s shadow. [x]

And then, she finally understood.
She never needed him in the first place, not him, and not any other man.
There was no space that needed to be filled, no missing pieces someone else held.
Anyone she let in was meant to complement her.
She had always been full.
—  Maxwell Diawuoh, Full