I’ve been thinking about being in a relationship a lot lately.
Like maybe that’s what I need. To be able to put my energy into another person/people and have them challenge me to stay open, vulnerable. To support each other and push each other to more and more heights. To hold me accountable and I them. To help me.
And then I remember A) having a constant makes me uncomfortable (and yet I crave it), B) my depression and anxiety is a huge ass beast that makes me disappear (physically and mentally) for long times, so who the hell wants to deal with that, C) if they can’t keep up with me I leave them behind but if they’re faster than me i get intimidated and shut down, and D) I can’t deal with being hurt when I’m vulnerable so to get to a point where I can start to open up to a romantic relationship would take too long and people tend to give up. So…🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃
- abandonment fears/self-imposed isolation - want to be loved/fear of intimacy - want to die/scared of dying - wants stability/wants impermanence - is perfect/is worse than the Worst - hypersexual/sex-repulsed - hates my family/loves my family - knows what career i want/doesn’t know anything else about who i am - introvert/extrovert - trust issues/oversharing - nicest person/giant asshole - doesn’t wanna grow up/wants to grow up and move out and live my own life
these are all the ones i can think of right now. feel free to add more if u relate and maybe i’ll add more if i think of them
harry potter books rated by mentions of ginny weasley
ps: harry describes ginny as the hogwarts express is leaving the platform. harry then sees her when he comes back after school ends. not enough ginny. 2/10
cos: ginny writes a poem for harry potter, gets possessed by the dark lord, and almost dies. this book has much ginny. very much ginny. 7/10
poa: isn’t mentioned much but gives a card to harry. what an angel. should have been in the book more. 1/10
gof: takes neville to the ball. other than that, not much ginny. 0/10.
ootp: more ginny in this book. very good. stops waiting around for harry and is herself. singlehandedly comes up with the name for dumbledore’s army. saves the entire gryffindor quidditch team by replacing harry as seeker. talks some sense into harry and gives him candy in the library bc ginny weasley don’t give a fuck about the rules. breaks her ankle fighting death eaters. has an inside joke with harry. 9/10
hbp: SO MUCH GINNY. GINNY PLAYING QUIDDITCH. GINNY GETTING BOYS. “BLAZING LOOK”. JOKES ABOUT HARRY HAVING A TATTOO OF A HUNGARIAN HORNTAIL ON HIS CHEST. IS HERSELF AND UNAPOLOGETIC THE ENTIRE BOOK. OVERALL A BADASS. 10000/10
dh: ginny holds harry’s hand. ginny kisses harry. GINNY SPENDS THE YEAR RESTARTING THE DA AND FIGHTING AGAINST SNAPE’S REGIME AT HOGWARTS. ginny fights in the battle of hogwarts. ginny is the last person harry potter thinks about before he “dies”. ginny becomes a professional quidditch player and marries harry potter. ginny has three beautiful children. ginny wins at everything. 10/10