Okay, I’ve been talking to a friend and like me, she’s
also, you know… delulu.
The saying about
‘birds of a feather flock together’ is
We talked about things and in the end we decided to post her analysis.
Tbh I was actually quite reluctant about posting some parts of this bc I feel
this thing is gonna make us sound even… crazier, but she said “so what? people already think we are crazy
I warn you guys this girl is highly
unfiltered so some of her words probably offending and rude, they are actually (and hella funny
imo but that’s just personal taste of humour), therefore I want to
apologize first on the behalf of this post (nah not really).
Again I remind you this is just a BULLSHIT DELULU THEORY, in a politer
word, an opinion, so ofc it would sound very biased, please don’t take it
to the heart. Believe what you want to believe.
“I said Kaistal is rushed is because of the
timing[a Pann post did say that this pairing was supposed to be outed
during June – July]. So by now you already know how SM has all these dating
stun bullshit, right? And how they control every fucking thing.
Okay, so kai is
actually paired with two ppl originally, krystal and yoona (back in 2012), but
when RV debuted, they decided to add seulgi to the list too. Kai’s pairing is
actually decided to be much much much
later, who the fuck knows when, all I know is it’s not supposed to be now.
Back to the plot. So if you observe
every fucking thing like I am, you would notice that SM was still experimenting
with Kai’s pairing, in short they didn’t fucking know who the fuck was his
final pairing yet so they were still baiting the public with each to see which
get more response.
If you remember that chinese
translation post, it says that kai is the kind that don’t like doing all this
pairing bullshit, right?
So that’s why even though kaistal is planned since
forever [in 2012 – like that insider 2012 post has stated], their moment back
in 2012-2014 are all brief and it’s not even actually a moment, just a moment
of delulu ahaks.. ha.
Anyway, SM has told Kai that he will
be paired with yoona or krystal since 2012, but since kai is such a freaking
rebel, he don’t obey it, or at least not 100%, that’s why all those kaistal or
seulkai moment are all half assed and not even deserving to call a moment lol,
but whatever, i’m not here to bullshit on ppl’s ship (i am). SO to rank the
kai’s ship that SM plan, 1- kaistal 2- yoonaxkai 3- seulkai (priorities here).
Let’s start with Yoonaxkai pairing shall we?
So they start from that W live
magazine photoshoot with seohyun back in 2012, where kai brought his puppy, i’m
sure you guys know what i’m talking about. and you guys know how he was like, “ohh noona so pretty my dog is
shy”. BUT it stopped there, why?
Because yoona dated seunggi that’s
why. so the ship was discontinued
Suddenly in Jan 2015 they decided that
hey, maybe we can bring back the yoona x kai pairing, because why? Cause we’re
SM and we don’t know his fucking final pairing, so there came the random ass
Elle photoshoot where he was asked about the bulshit Q like what do you think
of yoona and we saw you greet her and all that shit.
Obviously if you little
cute mind ppl don’t catch on, SM did this Elle photoshoot because they wanted
to test the public reaction to the ship, like I said, they were still
EXPERIMENTING. But oh no, the public only considered the pairing as brother
sister, so the ship sink like Titanic *sobs*
Moving on to seulkai pairing, if you
guys are curious little shit like me, you would be aware of this ship going
around for a while now.
WHY? because they happen to be friend when they are
trainee, and yes there is actually a pic that they took together back then
(with a group of ppl), unlike kaistal that is
said to be friends since trainee days by
DP but even sasaengs never heard of it (oh the horror) and also because
bored ppl like shipping ppl with exo or more specifically kai.
So basically this seulkai ship is
based on them being friends since trainee days, which tbh, how the fuck do you
guys knows they are that close of a friend? huh? okay, whatever.
Back to the point. This pairing started
when ppl saw Kai whisper to seulgi cute little ear at Gayo Daejun back in 2014,
and that apparently blares the fucking fire in hormonal teenagers’ heart, so
the boat sail.
And then the press conference shit happens where seulgi, wendy
and kai is the representative and some ppl were like, “Aww look at kai being shy with seulgi and him looking down”
and also the one from SBS GAYO DAEJUN 2015 where he allegedly acted shy because
seulgi was 5 m away from him even though if ppl weren’t so delulu they would
know that kai was entertained by his fellow sunbae Shinee.
Anyway, this ship sail, still sailing
eldorado. Ugh I like this song too much. So basically all these moments are
planned by SM even though kaistal is still the main ship, they are still
experimenting to see which got more response, which the ship does get a lot of
response too, but not as much as kaistal unfortunately for those hormonal
teenagers and some ahjummas. Please don’t be so naive to believe it’s not SM
doing or I’m going to deck ur face.
And finally to the glorious ship of
our focus, kaistal.
so this ship started when ppl see kai rubbing his water
bottle down krystal fragile arm because he was too busy staring at smth else
that I don’t care about, so ppl was like, “look
as how horny kai is that he even approach girls with a water fucking
bottle”, so the ship started and it has been sailing steadily for 3
years, but then suddenly on July 2015 came the long awaited photoshoot of
kaistal+taemin the so called ‘third wheeler’ [W magazine].
So if you guys are still turtles, this
photoshoot came cause SM want to test the response, and they decided to add
taemin because they think it’s subtle which is bullshit for a veteran company,
but in the end taemin as the buffer works and ppl believes it (people *sigh*).
When this photoshoot came out ppl went
wild and even burn a fucking car, because it was riot and all that shit. So
it’s safe to say the response was flaming hot and SM was happy with the result,
and they decided to go with kaistal as the final ship (with seulkai as the side
dish and maybe a sprinkle of yoonaxkai). p/s: no one burn a fucking car… it
was millions of it (i know my joke aren’t funny, stop wincing at it).
So now you get the histories of all these ships right? So move on to the theory
or maybe it’s the truth and i’m just a very good watson or sherlock, whatever.
If you guys are a very practical observer like me, you would notice that kai
airport fashion style has changed to fancy when Sep hit the 2015 calendar (Just
2 months after that W photoshoot).
And by then I already find that it’s suspicious
cause we all know that the guy can’t even wear socks to save his own fucking
life and suddenly he be wearing all these fancy ass shits? Nu-uh, something is going on here.
So you know the stages to know if idol
is dating (if they have vehicles, change of styles, specific ideal type etc..
all that crap). Kai obviously tick most of the requirement of this list, so
around that time people would be suspecting him being dating which he is indeed
'dating’ and then bam! DP said it’s
At this time period (Sept 2015) SM
already started what I call “Kaistal project”, it’s a lame ass name,
i know. Need to remind you guys, SM was STILL EXPERIMENTING at this time,
meaning they are still lax about releasing that they are 'dating’.
So when MAMA 2015 came is when shit
got real, i’m too lazy to explain but there’s this gif of all of the member
looking at kai when krystal is giving her speech and him singin krystal part in
4 walls and you know how that went and the response, like I said, SM was still
half experimenting half confirming their final ship, that’s why you guys see
side dishes of seulkai sometimes.
And then GDA happened and people saw that kai
pushed sehun aside to stand besides his beloved pseudo gf. Y’all know how it
I’m just going to jump into random
topic cause my thoughts is a mess.
Dispatch already made an agreement
with SM that SM will give them some spicy couple every few years, or i think
it’s just some spicy burritos.
Anyways, they had this agreement, so that DP
pictures you see of kaistal restaurant, with them not wearing any disguise or
mask even though it’s a public restaurant and there’s many cars so many people,
that shit is fake af, im sure you know it.
Those pics, they are shoot around Feb-March,
meaning that dispatch and SM already shot that picts when the the two group
ain’t busy, it’s just a theory, who told you to read this, feed your own
[This is gonna sound very delulu – tbh
even for me lol]
The imagination story goes that SM was relaxing in
their office drinking Starbucks coffee in the middle of March (or perhaps
around September bc that’s when the gay rumour started in Korean sites) when someone
barged in while holding kaisoo kissin pics and the horror ensued
OMG why the fuck is there suddenly
remember that rumour around the end of 2014 that some Chinese
fans claimed that they have pictures of kaisoo kissing at backstage after Japan
concert? And they said they were reluctant to release it, asking ppl ‘should we post it?’ and some ppl were
like ‘NO YOU’LL RUIN THEIR LIFE’ and
some were like ‘these two bitches are
So the thing is that Dispatch (or
probably other media outlets – DP isn’t the only one who loves juicy gossips)
already collecting proves of kaisoo being real and undeniable proof at that,
since forever, since kaisoo is speculate to be real af, please go read that
article about a news outlet wanting to release a gay idol couple and they are
preparing for the oncoming lawsuit from the respective company (means
the company is BIG) and blah blah blah.
If it was DP who barged in, the
scenario would prob be like “muahaha
i have a new thing to come up with that can give me serious cash flow”
and SM panicking and be like, “how
could u do this, we had an agreement, we agreed on me giving kaistal or whoever
kai pairing i will give since i’m so fucking indecisive after giving y’all
baekyeon”, DP : “well i
have better things to come out with and this is what i will come up with
*kaisoo pics make its appearance*” and they be spitting shit to each
other and then they made an agreement that DP will release kaistal pic in April
as April Fools (its a joke) to cover that kaisoo [or perhaps to make public
believe ‘bish they aint gay’ so the gay rumour that is being alleged on him
would be nullified].
That’s why I said that kaistal dating news are rushed,
they were supposed to be much much later,
but because DP got their hand on kaisoo pic FINALLY after years of collecting
JUSTIFYING proofs, they had to release it in April.
So the summary of this theory is that;
kaistal plan already started in
september 2015, airport fashion changed, kaistal rumor circulate on Pann, MAMA
shit happens, GDA shits happens, and then SM got a ‘surprise motherfucker’
visit from kaisoo proof, then SM rearranged the agreement making kaistal to be
released in April (Fool) instead of June – July (like that Pann post has said)”
This is just a made up story/theory, mkay? We don’t know for sure if SM does this to cover the gay – although it’s obvious (at least for me) that they do this to boost their newest group and covering krishan issue. And it’s obvious (again, at least for me) that the scandal has been arranged before by SM and DP.
Tbh I think I’m gonna get hates or mocks on bc of this… but oh well, it’s not my first time anyway. Go make fun of my delulunessss lol
Okay so today is
favorite voice actor and I’ll be honest here, I tend to…not really
notice voice actors? Don’t get me wrong I totally appreciate great
voice acting, but I rarely, if ever, know who’s who or who’s been in
what else. I’m just not good at paying attention to that.
But one thing DID
occur to me when I heard this prompt, and it’s something I heard
about a while ago that idk if it’s still true? But okay the voice
actor for this guy:
a while ago, he
got married to the voice actor for this gal:
AND THIS WILL
ALWAYS BE ENDLESSLY ENTERTAINING TO ME
so pls enjoy this
really fucking stupid edit of the pair of them
Ichigo has known
you for five minutes and she’s already done with your shit Vector she
can smell a shitty alien from a mile away she has eXPERIENCE
she’s not falling
for your cute act her shitty alien radar has been going off for ten
i know this had been said by practically every famous person in the world, but rumors seriously do suck so fucking much. all i want is a peaceful day out without anyone bothering me with questions about something that isn’t even true. it’s surprising as fuck that i haven’t decided to punch a paparazzi in the face yet because of them.