Day 1 of Blogmas
Y/N’s never been kissed before. Best friend Harry doesn’t know this. When he invites her to a Christmas party at his house and notices Y/N avoiding every entry way littered with mistletoe, Harry’s confused.
•Author choosing to stay ANONYMOUS.
As she stood on his doorstep, Y/N was very aware of one thing, and one thing only.
She raised her hand to ring the doorbell before quickly retreating, deciding it was too big a risk.
She opened the door and scampered through the entryway to find oodles of faces scattered around the open plan room; some of whom she knew, and some she was yet to know. But the only face she cared to see, was nowhere to be found.
Harry and Y/N had been best friends for as long as both could remember.
Her family had moved to Holmes Chapel after her father left the navy when she was three, wanting nothing more than to retreat to a small community, away from the city they’d raised their daughter in. Their mothers had met at a church function, had been inseparable ever since, and naturally, so had their children.
They spent their days making mud pies in the garden, playing with Y/N’s extensive Barbie collection, and singing along to S Club 7 in Harry’s kitchen at the top of their lungs. They even got married a few times.
Harry always kept an eye on Y/N at secondary school. He never let anyone lay a hand on her, and paid particular attention to make sure she didn’t end up with the wrong sort- the kind of care that both deeply touched and thoroughly annoyed Y/N.
When he left for The X Factor, Y/N was at a crossroads. Her overly protective best friend wasn’t there to cock block her anymore, but part of her always wanted him to be.
At the age of 14, she vowed to herself that she would save herself for the relationship that would be both her first and last. This proved to be useful all the way through school, as she completely avoided the heartbreak faced by her peers.
But by the time she’d made it through university without ever being kissed, she very much regretted her decision. She’d missed out on what she now thought to be a fundamental part of growing up, and now her first kiss would be shrouded with an intense amount of pressure- pressure she was frankly sick of.
Harry made it even harder for her. She knew she shouldn’t have been feeling the way she did. She knew her heart shouldn’t quicken when he looked into her eyes. She knew she shouldn’t be giddy when he sent her goodnight texts. But she also knew she wasn’t the only one.
Harry was always touchy feely, but in the last few months, he’d shown her a side of his heart that she was sure nobody else had seen.
His touches had lingered for much longer than they should have, and his eyes fell to places that a friend would never dare look.
They had leaned in a few times, but Y/N was determined to put it off for as long as possible. It’s not that she didn’t want to kiss him, it was that she was afraid she wouldn’t be enough for him.
But as always, Harry had other plans.
Y/N gazed around the room and couldn’t help but notice how much mistletoe that boy had managed to cram into a single space. Cheeky bastard.
“Guess who”, said the familiar voice, hands softly covering her eyes.
“Oprah Winfrey? Morgan Freeman? NO! WAIT! THE ROCK! Gosh I hope it’s The Rock! Such a big fan!”
“Nice party mate,” she said, mocking his voice.
“Thanks love. How long ‘av you been ‘ere? Didn’t see ya come in.”
“Only five minutes or so.”
“Lemme get ya a drink. Can’t ‘ave ya getting behind now can we?”
Harry circled the room with her, introducing her to some of his label friends and tour teams. They shared stories with her and she listened attentively as he giggled along. He even let her take the mick out of him a few times without putting up a fight- something he only did when they’d been in some kind of argument. But she was completely oblivious to this, with her main priority being avoiding those stupid plants.
He’d spent the entire morning hanging them in every place he possibly could, praying that she’d finally let him kiss her tonight. He was determined.
But he noticed. She was avoiding them like the plague and he noticed.
Perhaps he had misread the signs, or maybe it just wasn’t meant to be, but he knew she knew his plan and was doing everything she could to avoid him. Did it sting? Yes. Did it stop him? No.
He knew there was something between them, and he needed her like he needed air. She was his Y/N. His favourite. His world.
He gently guided her to his main hallway, where they stood at the base of the stairs.
“Sorry if I’ve monopolised you tonight pet. I don’t mean to hog you but I really missed ya on tour,” he admitted, running his hands lightly down her arms. “Hope you can come with me on the next one for a while.”
“I hope so too.”
She looked up at the small archway before lowering her gaze to meet his. His eyes. The ones that had looked the same since he was a little boy, suddenly looked different to her. They were telling her everything his mouth wasn’t saying, and she liked their words.
He cupped her cheek with his large hand, running his thumb along her cheekbone as she smiled up at him. Oh, her smile. His mind was blurry, his heart was racing and he was smiling back as he began to lean in. But alas, it wasn’t a fairytale.
“Harry,” she breathed with a hand against his chest. “I can’t.”
His gaze fell from her eyes as he and his heavy heart took a step back.
“Aaaaaah there they are!” yelled a very tipsy Grimmy as he stumbled over to the two. “Been lookin’ for ya everywhere!”
“Hi Grimmy. Y’alright?” she asked as she turned to hug him.
“Ooh watch out kiddos. Mistletoe up ‘ere. Might ‘ave to give ya a smooch.”
How could I be so stupid? She’s my best friend and I crossed a line. How can I look at her now? Will she even want to look at me?
Harry laid in bed that evening, staring at the ceiling and the faint glow of his Christmas lights seeping through the window. He hadn’t spoken to his Y/N for the rest of the evening- the hurt of being rejected from the one person who had seen his heart had enveloped him harder than he cared to admit.
There had been many times that he’d almost fallen in love in the past, but something always stopped him from giving himself away. He’d been deeply hurt more times than he could count, and although his relationships provided him with many things, there was always something missing.
Y/N was there with him through everything. She had seen him at his lowest and highest points and never treated him differently when he became a household name.
He knew she deeply cared for him, and wanted nothing more than to see him happy. She would give up anything and come running to him in the blink of an eye, and he never even had to ask. He craved her, and wanted to make her feel as loved as she did he.
But he had messed it up.
He first heard the creak of his bedroom door, followed by soft footsteps. He felt the bed sink as she laid beside him, looking up at the same point on the ceiling.
They laid in silence for what felt like hours. Their breathing in sync. Heavy space between them and neither daring to look at each other.
“I’ve never been kissed you know,” she said, barely above a whisper.0
“I’ve never kissed anyone.”
He didn’t say anything, and neither did she for a while.
“I really wanted you to kiss me Harry. I really did.”
His heart fluttered.
“But I couldn’t let you without talking to you first. I know it’s kind of embarrassing and a little weird, but I feel like I owed it to my teenage self. I want it to be special and I want us to be on the same page here.”
For the first time since she entered the room, he looked at her.
She’d changed into penguin printed pyjamas, taken off her makeup, and her cheeks were striped with leftover tears.
He reached over and held her small hand in one of his, and ran the other through her hair. She was it for him, that he knew for sure. And as their eyes met in that moment, he could only say one thing.
“I love you Y/N. Always have, always will.”
She donned the most beautiful lopsided grin he had ever seen as she turned to him with glassy eyes.
“And I love you Harry. Always have, always will.”
In that moment, any fear she had was replaced with intense warmth. She reached up to touch his face, and began to move closer, when his eyes widened and he briskly jumped out of bed.
“Up,” he ordered.
“It’s Christmas time innit? Gotta do this the proper way,” he stated before running to her side of the bed, picking her up, and setting her down in his doorway.
“You’re such a little dork Harry Styles.”
He slowly leaned in, holding her close to him.
He was soft, gentle, and passionate, and her body ignited in a way that it never had before.
As they pulled away and their eyes met once more, one word came to both of their minds.