and now i have a shitton of work to do before i sleep

40 tips for incoming college freshmen
  1. “I’ll sign up for morning class because I tookclasses in the morning in high school.” NO DON’T DO THAT YOU’RE GOING TO WANTTO KILL YOURSELF
  2. If you can,try to spread your schedule so it’s 9-5. It’ll get you used to functioning atthose hours.
  3. Go to seminars. Pick up on some random shit. Impress people with random shit. But don’t be cocky.
  4. There’s literally no popularity so you really don’t have to fucking deal with cliques or anything just find your group and branch out and go from there.
  5. If you’re drinking:
    1. POUR YOUR OWN DRINK I CANNOT EMPHASIZE THIS ENOUGH
    2. Have a cup of water (or a bit of Gatorade) between every drink. You’ll never get a hangover.
    3. Don’t be fucking loud. Everyone hates the loud drunk and you’ll get the cops called on you and that’s bad shit.
    4. Don’t mix your liquor with other liquor and oh my God don’t mix it with anything else like drugs that’s just asking for a crisis.
    5. If your buddy is in a really bad place call 911. Don’t be that douchebag who thinks that someone can sleep it off.
  6. DO EXTRA CREDIT FOR THE LOVE OF FUCKING GOD NOT EVERY PROFESSOR OFFERS EXTRA CREDIT DO THE FUCKING EXTRA CREDIT.
  7. College is for expanding your mind. Talk to friends about their majors. Attend their events or art shows. Talk to someone you met about their religion. Take an English class on Lord of the Rings. Learn things you wouldn’t normally learn in high school.
  8. Love might come. It might not. Don’t worry about it and it won’t be a problem. You’re young.
  9. Don’t be the douchebag who plays acoustic guitar in the lounge.
  10. Have fun because you’re spending a fuckton of money to be there but do your homework.
  11. There’s a general rule of college that if you were sitting in that seat for over two weeks, that is your seat. Not many if any professors have seating arrangements but switching seats will fuck everyone up.
  12. Get there early and stay late. As soon as you get home you will not want to do shit. Stay on campus and do some homework while you’re in the environment.
  13. SIT UP FRONT. The best way to start understanding something is to listen to someone talk about it and you can’t do that from the back of the class trying to listen over everyone whispering to each other. LISTENING WILL MAKE HOMEWORK SO MUCH EASIER. 
  14. Be childish, but be respectful. Have a massive snowball fight across campus, but don’t aim for anyone not taking part. 
  15. SHUT THE FUCK UP IN THE LIBRARY. Some people work there, some people sleep there. It is a quiet space. 
  16. Don’t be afraid to talk to professors. They are not there to flunk you. They would rather you pass than not.
  17. IF YOU NEED TUTORING GET TUTORING DON’T WAIT UNTIL YOU’VE DUG YOURSELF INTO YOUR GRAVE.
  18. Get involved. It will help you make friends, give you new skills to learn, and even help you get a leg up in the work place if you know the right people.
  19. Take time for yourself—buy a planner, figure out when your best study hours are, figure out WHERE you study best, and figure out how much time you need to complete an assignment—AND THEN make sure to pencil in an hour for video games, some time to watch a TV show, or time to just lay on your floor and blow bubbles. Whatever you like. Don’t forget about YOU.
  20. SLEEP. EAT. DRINK WATER. Don’t die. Caffeine =/= sleep. I cannot emphasize that this much.
  21. COMMUNICATE WITH YOUR INSTRUCTORS! If you’re sick, shoot an e-mail and say “Hey, I’m sick today. Can I set up a time to talk to you about what I missed?” If you’ve got a good opportunity (scholarships, to go to another country, to check out a cool lecture, etc.) let your prof know ahead of time. If you just need time to work on projects, all it takes is an e-mail. We understand. I gave a student a free skip day because he e-mailed me and said “Hey, look, I have two massive tests and a project due and I need the time to study.” And THAT IS OKAY
  22. Before signing up for classes, look on “ratemyprofessor.com" and see if the teachers at your campus are included. There may be two or more teachers for the same course, and you want to try and pick the good/easy one. Who your professor is can have a great affect on what grade you make, even for the “same” class. 
  23. Look for a facebook group for your “graduating class” set up, which is a good way to make friends and find people with similar interests (particularly for introverts). 
  24. Look for a facebook group for your “graduating class” set up, which is a good way to make friends and find people with similar interests (particularly for introverts). 
  25. If no one else does it, make a google doc of the exam reviews and post it on the class facebook page. That way everyone contributes to the review. 200 brains are most definitely better than 1. 
  26. During lectures, unless Internet is required, TURN IT OFF. If it’s on, you WILL end up on tumblr or some other site, and you will miss important shit. 
  27. For the love of God, pay attention to your syllabus. Sometimes assignments are listed there, and that’s the only place it’ll be mentioned. Also, if it says to do a reading by a specific date, DO THE READING BY THAT DATE. Otherwise you will get behind, and you will have 200+ pages of textbooks to read in one night before the test, and you will cry.
  28. Yes you actually need to do the readings. Yes it is a lot. Yes it will suck. Do it anyways. 
  29. If you are used to getting all A’s, do not cry when you get a B. Take it from someone who killed herself for two years to maintain a 4.0, it feels like the end of the world when your GPA drops, but it’s not. You’ll be okay. Just breathe and do your best. Your best is good enough.
  30. Try to make sure you leave an open hour around midday so that you have time to get food in you. A lot of people forget to do this. If you have to have back to back classes, check your syllabus or with your teacher—some midday classes allow you to bring in a drink and a snack. Some will even allow you a full meal.
  31. If you can get an online/pdf copy of the book without busting the bank, DO IT. Sometimes there are even annotated versions online. This can make notetaking a shitton easier, because you can highlight printed-out versions of the book and they won’t dock you on the money back. Sometimes professors move through their lecture too fast for you to write stuff down. Shrugging off that old ‘don’t ruin your books’ rule you had in high school may be your only hope.
  32. UNLESS YOU NEED THEM OR REALLY WANT TO KEEP THEM TRY TO SELL BACK YOUR BOOKS—maybe even offer them online to incoming students. You won’t get nearly the worth of them but someone after you will thank you a million times over for providing a used copy. If you take good notes, you can sometimes buy/sell those as well. A lot of professors teach literally the same class every time.
  33. IF YOUR PROFESSOR PUTS NOTES ONLINE GET THEM. GET THEM NOW. TRUST ME. YOU WANT THOSE NOTES. Bring them in with you if it’s possible to get them before class.
  34. Keep change on hand. Always.
  35. The Best Way To Make Friends:
    1. Bring a printer with you to college and offer to print people’s stuff for half of what the school does or for free if you can afford it.
    2. Carry around small candies with you and offer them to people while waiting outside of class. If you are the ‘candy person’ this gives you an in for starting conversations.
    3. Buy a jumbo pack of chalk and find an open sidewalk on a free day. Write the words ‘Come draw with me?’ and begin doodling.
    4. Have a pack of cards.
  36. If you go onto campus and you can’t find what you’re looking for, and you are afraid to go up to someone and ask, find an open, well-populated area, hold your schedule/map in hand, and walk in circles for a few minutes, looking up and around in obvious confusion. Other students know this body language well. Someone will stop and point you in the right direction. (if you are worried that the person’s directions are a joke or faulty, wait for them to leave and take up the stance again; if the directions match-up the second time, they’re legit; do not allow a person to ‘show you the way’ unless EVERY STEP is along an obvious walkway, just in case)
  37. For those of you who fear assault, most campuses aren’t much for small blades or mace. Carry a pocket air horn or a hand bag of those little pop-rock fireworks unless you can get a concealed weapons permit.
  38. Make friends with transfer kids. Chances are, they won’t be able to live in the dorms and it’ll be ten times harder for them to meet people since they have to drive to and from campus. It’s also fun hearing about their experiences before the college you both go to. 
  39. Make friends with an older student. I’m talking about students who have families and full-time jobs. You can learn a lot from them, and they honestly have the best stories. They’re often the smartest and the most dedicated, so they make great study buddies. 
  40. Your teachers are people! Joke around with them, talk to them a bit during break. Make sure they at least recognize you as “that dude with the god-awful puns during break”. In my experience, professors are even more willing to bend over backwards to help the students they know. (But also, in general? They want you to learn! If there’s a way they can easily help, there’s a really good possibility they’ll do it!

Just cleaned up this post ≧◡≦

Perfect-A Josh Dun Imagine

Based off of Ed Sheeran’s song Perfect. Check it out my frens it’s pretty sick. I’ll get on with it. Hope you enjoy.

TW: slight cursing?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You and Josh had been best friends since you were little. You’ve been attached at the hip ever since he punched the kid that pushed you over and yanked your pigtails in first grade. You went to the same junior high and high school as well, and everywhere you guys went you always got the same question, “Why aren’t you two dating yet?”

At first it always bothered you because you and Josh were best friends and nothing more, and you couldn’t understand why society couldn’t just accept that guys and girls could be friends and nothing more. You were his wingwoman. always helping score dates or kisses with his crushes by talking him up to all the girls or distracting other boys. seduction seemed to be one of your greatest skills, as Josh once mentioned after you would willingly stick your tongue down a guys throat as a distraction. Over time, though, the question bothered you less and less.

Things got harder during college when you went to Ohio State and Josh stayed at home, but you always met up on weekends and days you weren’t stuck with shittons of homework. You were both in the same city, but heading on different paths, but despite that you two were still as close as ever. Soon, however, he got into twenty one pilots, and the friendship went worldwide. It hurt that your best friend was so far away, but whenever he got back in town, you were always the first on his list.

That brings you to now, sitting on Jenna’s couch waiting for the boys to come home while reminiscing about your elementary escapades with Josh while Jenna laughs out of pure entertainment while you retold the story of the previously mentioned make-out distraction which Josh calls ‘the seduction expedition.’ His words not yours.

“So you actually made out with this random dude from your class just so Josh could get some action, really Y/N?”

“We were freshmen, Jen. Would you have rather I strip tease as a distraction?” you laughed at Jenna’s reaction.

“OH gosh no!” She yelled while gasping for breath.

“Could you imagine, Jenna?” you began “little 14 year old me with no tits stripping to help my best friend score?” You both broke into hysterics again only to be interrupted by the doorbell.

“Y/n could you get that I have to grab something to show you.”

“Sure Jen.” You drag yourself off the couch and to the door. Opening the door while shout back at Jenna “Just wait ‘til you hear about Josh falling out of a tree to get a girl’s attention.” You chuckle to yourself turning back to the door. “Oh Tyler. Sorry I was just telling your wife embarrassing stories about our best friend.”

“It’s alright” he chuckles as he pulls you in for a hug. “It’s good to see you again.” You step aside and allow him in.

“Jen it’s for you” you call for Jenna, and she comes bolting down the stairs, and flings herself into her husbands arms. They hug for nearly a minute before they let go, and even then they just stare at each other. Feeling awkward for interrupting you decide to take your leave. “uh, sorry to interrupt this beautifully tearful reunion, but I’ll head out so you two have some alone time.”

“No please, y/n” Tyler begins “I would love to hear all the embarrassing things Josh did before I knew him.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“He didn’t?” Tyler giggled at the latest story about yours and Josh’s escapades. 

“He did! He jumped in the 5 degree water because he was trying to impress his crush.” You wheezed while you thought about the look on his face when he jumped in. You smiled to yourself.

“Did it work?” Jenna asked from her spot on Tyler’s lap.

“No that’s the best part. She was so unimpressed.” 

“Did it impress you?” Tyler asked, smirking for a reason unknown to you. 

“A little. I never would’ve done it.” You clutched your stomach, the three of you flailing around with laughter. You were happy with Tyler and Jenna, but you felt a hole because your best friend was missing. 

“You okay y/n?”

“Yeah, Ty. Just missing Josh s’all.” You shrug. “Where is he anyway?” 

“He had a rough couple of nights the past couple of weeks.” Tyler replied. “I’m sure he’s just catching up on sleep. He’ll visit soon.” 

“Is he okay? What happened?” 

“His anxiety spiked, but he’s okay. Calm down y/n”

“I know I’m sorry. I’m just worried about him ‘cause–”

“Cause you’re in love with him.” Tyler finished for you. 

“I-I’m” you stuttered shocked at the accusation. “I’m not in love with Josh. Are you insane?”

“Think about it y/n.” There you sat, thinking about Josh and how he is the only source of light in your life. You think about his smile and his crinkly eyes and his laugh. You think about the times when you hang out together, and how at those times it’s like nothing else matters. You think about all your romantic relationships and how none of them have worked, and you think about the cause and how none of them have made you feel like the way that Josh made you feel.

“Oh my God I’m in love with Josh.”

“Ding ding ding. We have a winner. Tyler you owe me five bucks.” 

“Guys this isn’t a joke! What do I do?” 

“You love him.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You go home after a couple of hours with Tyler and Jenna. The revelations taking their toll on you, and as soon as you get home you fall on your couch and fall asleep. 

You wake again, a couple hours later to an incessant and annoying pounding. You check your phone, noting the 3:00 shining back at you. The knocking continues, realizing its the door, you stand, fix your hair, straighten the dress you fell asleep in, and head to the door. “Who the fuck is at my door at 3 in the fucking morning?” you mumble on your way to the door. “What the fuck-Oh Josh?” 

“Y/n!” He grabs you by the waist and pulls you into a hug. Oh how you missed his hugs. “I’ve missed you so much.” 

“I missed you too, Jishy.” You pull back. “What brings you here at this ungodly hour where no one should be standing let alone awake.” You giggle.

“Sorry,y/n. I know its late, or early, or…whatever, but I’m awake and jet-lagged as hell, but most importantly I missed my best friend. Come on, let’s go.” 

“Jish, it’s 3 am. Where could we possibly go? Nothing’s open.”

“I planned a picnic come on.” He smiles that crinkly smile, and your resolve disappears. 

“Alright, Jishy. Let me get my shoes.” You run upstairs to your bathroom to fix your makeup and hair. Grabbing your shoes, you rush downstairs and out the door, locking it behind you, and to Josh’s car. 

“Buckle up, buttercup.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You and Josh drive outside of town to a field on the edge of a forest. He pulls out a couple of blankets, a picnic basket, and a small speaker. “Josh this place is beautiful how’d you find it?” He sets a blanket down, and places the basket and speaker down on top of it. Plugging in his phone, he turns on his music turns toward you. 

“I found it a while ago when I needed to sort through some things in my head. I thought it was pretty refreshing.” 

“It wonderful” you said as you stared at the stars. There was little light pollution over the field so you could multitudes of stars, something you always loved to see. 

Josh stared right at you, “It sure is.” 

Unaware of his gaze you turn to the picnic. Slipping off your shoes and taking a seat, you begin to pull out the contents of the basket. “Hey drummer boy, are you gonna join me, or am I going to have to eat this dessert feast by myself?” 

“I’m coming, princess, calm down.” You laugh.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Josh’s POV

Y/n and I spend the next hour and a half laughing, talking, reminiscing all while stuffing our faces with all different kinds of desserts. Y/n was in the middle of retelling a story about a hobo who she found chasing a rat when the song playing through the speaker caught her attention.

“I found a love for me. 
Darling, just dive right in and follow my lead.
Well I found a girl, beautiful and sweet.
I never knew you were the someone waiting for me.”

“Oh my gosh I love this song.” She stood and began to twirl and sway to the music. 

I watched her dance lightly, unable to keep my love for her from showing on my face. Luckily, she didn’t notice. She just danced and danced to the music playing from my phone. “I know. You wouldn’t shut up about it. It’s all you talked about.” I replied. She stopped and stared at me. Her y/e/c eyes met mine, and I felt my heart speed up a little. God, she was beautiful. 

“Dance with me” was all she said. Pulling me to my feet and bringing my hands to her waist, we slowly rocked to the music playing softly from my speaker. 

“’Cause we were just kids when we fell in love
not knowing what it was
I will not give you up this time
But darling just kiss me slow
Your heart is all I own
And in your eyes you’re holding mine”

“Can I tell you something?” she whispered looking up at me through her eyelashes. She took my breath away. God, why couldn’t I just tell her how in love with her I am. 

“Yeah.” I whispered back. I don’t know why we were whispering, it just felt right, like we didn’t want to ruin whatever moment we were trapped in

“I was with Ty and Jenna earlier, and I realized something” she began  “something that could change everything.” She glanced to our feet, blushing. 

“Baby, I’m dancing in the dark
with you between my arms
barefoot on the grass
listening to our favorite song”

“Give me a second this is hard for me.” She let out a breath. “This thing has always been there, you know, and it really didn’t hit me til today…god, I’m a mess.” She let out a breathy laugh, playing with her fingers that were linked on the back of my neck. Why was she nervous. 

“When you said you looked a mess
I whispered underneath my breath
But you heard it
Darling, you look perfect tonight”

“Why are you so nervous y/n? It’s just me.” 

“I’m nervous because this could ruin everything!” She stilled,but her hands remained wrapped around my neck. “I’m nervous because this realization changed everything and if I don’t say anything it’ll eat me up inside.” She sighed.  “I’m nervous because we promised that we will always be honest with each other, but this is the only thing that I have ever doubted telling you.” Then quietly, like I wasn’t supposed to hear, “I’m nervous ‘cause I could lose you.”

“Well I found a woman
Stronger than anyone I know
She shares my dreams 
I hope that someday I’ll share her home” 

“You won’t lose me, y/n.” She looked up, surprised that I had heard her. “Whatever it is it won’t scare me away.” I smiled. “I’m here to stay.” 

“I found a love
to carry more than just my secrets
to carry love, to carry children of our own”

“Okay here it goes.” Her eyes met mine, once again taking my breath, and all my coherent thoughts, away. “I’m in love with you, Josh Dun. I’ve been in love with you for years. I’ve been in love with you for so long that I can’t even remember when it began, and I know you don’t feel the same, and I’m sorry if this makes our friendship weird, but I’m so in love with you it takes my breath away, and I don’t want to be anywhere else when I’m with you.” 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Your POV

There was a pause. You held your breath waiting for any reaction from Josh. Still there was silence, so you unlatched your finger from Josh’s neck. “I’i m sorry I-I” You pulled away, readying yourself to run. This was a huge mistake. But you suddenly find yourself pulled against Josh’s chest with strong hands holding you still and Josh’s lips moving against yours. Bliss.

“We are still kids, but we’re so in love
fighting against all odds 
I know that we’ll be alright this time
Darling just hold my hand 
Be my girl, I’ll be your man
I see my future in your eyes”

Josh smiled that Cheshire cat-like grin. “I’ve been wanting to do that for years.” Relief flooded your face and you laughed. 

“Me too, Jishy. Me too.” You pulled him against you again. Chests meeting chests, lips meeting lips. Hearts meeting hearts. 

“Baby, I’m dancing in the dark
with you between my arms
barefoot on the grass
Listening to our favorite song
When I saw you in that dress, looking so beautiful
I don’t deserve this 
Darling, you look perfect tonight”

“Why didn’t we do this sooner?” Josh laughed looking at you like you tend to look at the stars. 

“Because we’re idiots.” You leaned against Josh, burying your face in his neck. He kissed your hair. 

“Yeah, but I’m your idiot.” 

“And I’m yours.” You smiled. Your lips meet Josh’s once again.

“Now that I’m allowed to do that I don’t want to stop.” Josh kissed all over your face.

“Me either.” 

“I love you so much, y/n.”

“I love you too, Jishy.”

“Baby, I’m dancing in the dark
With you between my arms
Barefoot on the grass
Listening to our favorite song
I have faith in what I see
Now I know I have met an angel in person
And she looks perfect
No, I don’t deserve this
You look perfect tonight”

 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I hope you enjoyed this. I do take requests just hmu. Should I start writing more? Let me know. Feedback is appreciated.

Clothes Pile [1/1]

Summary: Fluffy funnsies with Alex and Astra. 
Word Count: 1.3K
Beta’d
Notes: You know when you just crawl into clothes straight out from the drier/washing machine? Also there’s just a bunch of crack here :/ nothing serious. Not going to put it below a ‘read more’ since it’s shorter than usual. Death to complainers!


“What the hell Astra,” Alex exclaimed, having returned back to her apartment for the night and finding her girlfriend buried under a heap of clothes. The two had originally been planning to take the day off together, since Astra had blown out her powers just a couple days before, but was slowly recovering her strength back by the hours, but Alex had been called back to the DEO when some plant life experiment of theirs grew and took up the entire lab seemingly overnight. The case hadn’t been solved, but when Kara had bounced through the halls of the DEO and dropped her [stolen] cupcake from shock, the plant monster seemed to shy away from the ruined dessert. Momentarily contained, Alex was free to return home, while Kara sulked away and pouted all the way out of the underground base, threatening to just laser the stupid plant to death.

In short, her day had been … oddly stressful. Especially since Astra decided to start giving her the cold shoulder, and absolutely refused to return any of her calls and texts ever since she left the apartment in the morning after their shared breakfast. It left her in a sour mood, and when one was working on solving some supernatural bullshit, sour moods rarely ever helped. Even as the short haired agent was making her way back home, she grumbled under breath, eye twitching impatiently even as she went and bought a stupid fish plushie to appease her girlfriend when she returned.

What she didn’t expect though, was to find that the apartment smelled way too … clean, like someone had sprayed a shitton of febreze in the room, making her just slightly nauseous. Then in the middle of the room, where her coffee table should have been, was the largest pile of clothes that Alex had ever seen. She knew for a fact that she never let her clothes pile up to this amount ever, but then realized that with the amount was probably equivalent to her entire fucking closet.

She had texted Astra to only take the laundry out from the washing machine, so really, Alex had absolutely no idea how the other woman managed to create such a huge mess. And to leave the mess too! Just as Alex was about to shout something else, the pile of clothes in front of her shifted. Without missing a beat, Alex’s gun was in her hands, safety off, steadied by her hands, and aimed right into the middle of the now very suspicious pile of clothes.

Slowly, Alex began creeping up to the pile, her gun trained on the now unmoving, but still very suspicious, pile. When she deemed herself close enough to the pile, the brunette reached out with her foot, poking at the pile when suddenly a hand from within shot out and grabbed at her ankle, pulling harshly. A few choice words spilled forth from her tongue as she came falling down, gun still gripped tightly in her hands, even as she landed flat on her ass. She never got to fire off her rounds though, not when the hand continued to pull her into the massive pile.

Heart beating erratically, Alex tried her best to look frantically into the darkness, even as the warmth of the, most likely just washed and dried, clothes threatened to lower her guard. As familiar, but scarily toned arms began to wrap around her waist though, the only thing Alex could hear was her own thoughts, telling herself not to scream or make any other weak girlish noises. Her thoughts only continued to grow louder and louder as she eventually felt a body, a female body, press up against her, someone’s cheek meeting her own, and someone else’s hair falling over her face. Gulping, Alex only dared to speak when she was certain her voice would not shake or waver.

“Astra. What the hell are you doing?” She asked quietly, switching the safety back on the gun.

“Mm. Feels good,” was the only response she received and Alex frowned. Astra was very eloquent, wordy too, not to mention formal and sometimes even uptight with how she delivered her words. Just what the hell had happened to make her girlfriend crawl into this massive pile of clothes?

“Hey, stay with me, why the hell are there so many clothes?” Alex tried to coo at her, adjusting her voice so that she wasn’t necessarily scolding the Kryptonian, who sounded half asleep in all honesty. She even acted it too, what with the cheek-nuzzling and soft puffs of air at her neck.

“It was very warm, I couldn’t help but to wash all your clothes a few more times, just to crawl under it all,” Astra confessed, pressing her soft lips against her cheek. “I even grabbed a few from our neighbors, they hung it on the silly string so I assumed that they had no need of it,” she continued, easily pulling Alex along with her as she turned onto her other side. As she readjusted them both, Astra made sure to curl around Alex even more so, “if these get cold, can you go wash and dry them again? I don’t think I can ever sleep without this warmth again…” Astra mummered off, her arms curling around Alex tightly, unwilling to let go of both her and the stupid warmth of the clothes.

“Astra, if you don’t let go I’ll suffocate down here.”

“Astra?”

“Oh my god you stupid Kryptonian, let me go.”

“Unhand me you stupid fiend, I need to pee!”

“I swear to god I’ll fart, I am not above it. Astra? Astra!”

“I’ll fucking burn the nemo plushie I got you today, I swear I’ll do it.”

“For fucks sake, do I have to strip and get myself going in order to get you up?”

“I hate you. Wake up already!”

“Fuck this, I knew I should have banged and got with that other Kryptonian when I had the chance.” Alex groaned, frustrated, light headed and more than a little mischievous at this point.

“Give me the fucking name,” Astra growled, her chin and jaw grinding lightly on top of her head, “and don’t you dare say Yseult.”

“If you don’t fucking get me out of this pile I’m going to just give her a lap dance next time we find her” Alex threatened, and quite suddenly, light flooded her eyes, and she groaned, screwing her eyes shut and burying her head into Astra’s shoulders as she General easily picked her up and carried them both from the [still] warm pile and into the bedroom.

That night, the General was in a very unforgiving and possessive mood. She did not allow her human to recover for most of the night, bringing her to an orgasm time after time, and smiling in the most satisfied fashion every time Alex did scream and gasp her name. Oh, and the way her legs wrapped around the General’s shoulders, trembling and losing every sense of control only served to encourage the Kryptonian ever more. Then when Astra decided that the bed was drenched with enough sweat and brought Alex to the shower, then the walls lining the hall between the different rooms, and eventually the glass doors, just before their balcony in the dead of the night.

Alex had to call in the next day, unable to even swing her legs off the bed, let alone walk and actually report for alien hunting duty. And Astra, the ever faithful and responsible girlfriend, had stayed with Alex, just to make sure the shorter brunette was comfortable in every way while recovering from their nightly activities. Astra even presented their neighbors with their messing clothes, apologizing on Alex’s behalf as she did so, too.

Yoongi x Reader

Originally posted by yoo-ngie

A long, angsty fic in which you fight with Yoongi. How new and original, right? Sometimes I wonder if I can create anything else tbh.

Prompt: Upon finding out that your teacher has given you a lower grade than normal on a paper you worked hours on, you come home enraged.

Enjoy!

Keep reading

Hold Me Down

inspired by a shitton of Halsey songs :D

Wade Wilson (Deadpool) x (fem)Reader

Written by: mypatronusiswadewilson

Word Count: 2038 (I had fun with it)

Warnings: Swearing. Smut. And Fluff. Smuff? No that sounds really bad; waaaay too close to those russian - WADE GET FLYING FUCK OFF MY LAPTOP- Sorry Kat, I was just trying to help you out, god. Take a fuckin chill pill, or, you know, I could give you one - Wade…- Is that a yes?

Summary: The reader is training by herself in Stark Tower’s gym, until Wade comes in to help her out ;) and by that I mean hot, sweaty- DAMNIT WADE- Hehehe. Oh and there’s fluff stuff in there too. Have fun kiddos!

(This is my first time actually sitting down and writing smut before, so I hope it’s adequate)

I DO NOT OWN ANY OF HALSEY’S SONGS

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

You were covered head to toe in sweat, training in the massive gym inside the Stark tower. It was dead silent when you had walked in, as everyone else was deeply asleep.

This was your routine. Try to sleep, fail, go down three floors and train. It was either that or actually fall asleep and get maybe 20 minutes of rest before the nightmares ripped you from dreamland and into the real world. Then you’d train anyway. It kept you productive instead of self-destructive.

Grateful Tony had sound proofed the walls specifically so everyone else could still sleep while you worked out, you blasted your ipod playlist entitled “workout”, which had a lot of AC/DC and Survivor, but tonight you had Halsey albums put on repeat. They gave you a sense of slow-building power that could be seen in your punches to the boxing bag. Classic rock was fine in terms of empowering music, but Halsey’s lyrics kept you alert.

“I sat alone, in bed ‘til the morning

I’m crying, “They’re coming for me”

And I tried to hold these secrets inside me

My mind’s like a deadly disease”

Before too long you moved to the wooden practice dummies to work on your sword skills. Continuously hitting the sliced wood again and again until you got one of the the blades so deep into the wood that it was impossible to get it out. During this time, someone stepped into the room, their footsteps hidden by the loudness of the music.

“Y/N!” the red and black masked man called, but you couldn’t hear him. So he strolled up to you casually to tap you on the shoulder, only to be met with a dagger to the thigh. “JESUS FUCK!”

“Oh my god! Wade!!?” you shouted, grabbing the remote for the stereo and turning down the music. “Why didn’t you say that you came in?!”

Wade pulled the dagger from his thigh, it slowly healing. “I did! But you were too busy trying to go deaf. Why the hell are you awake, stabby?”

“Couldn’t sleep,” you said simply, not wanting to go into detail as you tried to pry the sword from the dummy.

“I’m bigger than my body

I’m colder than this home

I’m meaner than my demons

I’m bigger than these bones”

“Oh…kay?” he said, not wanting to push it as he yanked out the sword with ease. “You know, hitting a dummy over and over doesn’t really help you train. I could practice with you.”

“I’d still be hitting a dummy,” you chuckled as he handed you back the sword.

“Rude! And just when I was beginning to like you too! I’m not sharing my tacos with you anymore,” Deadpool huffed and crossed his arms over his chest, making you laugh a little.

“Alright, alright, I’m sorry. Now are we gonna train?” you asked, stepping onto the sparring mat in the middle of the room.

Wade unsheathed his katanas as he joined you on the mat “Hey, you need to even out the playing field. One sword for you.”

You looked at him incredulously “Why the fuck would I do that??”

“Because. You get the best sparring partner in the world. You can hit me as many times as you want and I’ll be fine. I can’t really hit you back without actually hurting you. You get one sword so it’s just as hard for you to hit me.”

You sighed as the song changed in the background “Fine,” you replied, tossing one sword to the side.

“Are you insane like me? Been in pain like me?

Bought a hundred dollar bottle of champagne like me?”

And with that, you struck at him. He blocked by crossing his blades in front of him “What? No glove touch first?” he said sarcastically as you swung again, which he lept over.

“Or, you know, we could touch something else if you want,” and if he wasn’t wearing his mask, you could’ve seen the smirk.

“In your dreams, Wilson.” you chuckled, knowing he was trying to play mind games with you, trying to make you slip up.

“So why couldn’t you sleep anyway?” Wade asked as the two of you fought

“None of your business, okay?”

“Oh come on! You can tell me babycakes. Were you too busy thinking about my ass again?”

You made a face and huffed, knowing he wasn’t going to leave the topic alone “Nightmares Wade. There, you happy?” you said bitterly.

“Oh…”

“You can’t wake up, this is not a dream,

You’re part of a machine, you are not a human being,

With your face all made up, living on a screen,

Low on self esteem, so you run on gasoline.”

You dodged and parried and lunged for what seemed like forever. When Wade accidentally cut the side of your forearm and tried to apologize, you took the opportunity to slice your blade up the side of his face, ripping his mask.

“OW! Oh I see, you’re gonna fight dirty are you? Two can play at that game, sweet cheeks.” he said, swinging a foot around to catch behind your knee, knocking you to the ground and swinging his blades down upon you, which you blocked.

“Are you deranged like me? Are you strange like me?

Lighting matches just to swallow up the flame like me?

Do you call yourself a fucking hurricane like me?

Pointing fingers cause you’ll never take the blame like me?”

Wade pinned you to the floor by stradling you and leaned through your connected swords to whisper in your ear, his breath hot against your skin. “You know, I could probably help with those nightmares. I could exchange them with the thoughts of me pleasuring you in ways you couldn’t even imagine.”

“W-Wade??” you asked, shocked he was saying that to you. “What’re you-”

“My head right between your thighs, licking your pussy relentlessly” he cut you off “Kissing every inch of your skin until you beg me to fuck you until you can’t walk as you call my name over and over again,” he said, a smirk obvious in his voice as his scent filled your nose. Gunpowder and leather and….cologne?

Dear god it all made heat pool in your stomach and your fingers ache to touch him. “Wade…” you whispered softly

He grinned “Yes, kitten? Are you gonna purr for me now?” he asked pulling up his mask enough to place kisses on your neck.

“Put your swords down,” you practically commanded

“Mmm, someone’s anxious. Does this mean I win?”

“Put your fucking swords down. Now.”

He smirked “Sure thing princess.” he said tossing his katanas away to the other side of the mat, you tossing yours along with them.

You didn’t hesitate to pull his lips down to yours, the feeling of his chapped, scarred lips against your soft ones making you crave him more. He slid his gloves off of his hands before trailing one down your stomach and into your spandex shorts.

“Mmm, naughty naughty Y/N. Already wet and I’ve hardly done any real work yet,” he said as he began to rub you where you wanted it most earning him a mewl of pleasure.

“Waaade,” you gasped when he wiggled a finger around your panties and began pumping into you slowly.

“Mmmm, yes kitten?”

“Everybody wants to know

If we fucked on the bathroom sink

How your hands felt in my hair

If we were high on amphetamines”

You didn’t answer him, and instead tried to pull his suit off of his body, needing to feel his skin on yours.

“Easy there sexy, any harder and you’ll rip it” he smirked pulling away from you to take off the suit. You propped yourself up on your elbows to watch his little strip tease show with a smirk.

“Enjoying the view?” he asked, pulling off the skin tight shirt and tossing it aside.

“They think I’m insane, they think my lover is strange

But I don’t have to fucking tell them anything, anything

And I’m gonna write it all down, and I’m gonna sing it on stage

But I don’t have to fucking tell you anything, anything”

You bit your lip in response as you looked him up and down once his pants and briefs were off. After a moment you spoke as he leaned over you again, arms propping him up on either side of your body.

“Wade..”

“Mm?”

“Your mask is still on.”

“Oh… yeah. It’s fine if I keep it on, right?”

You gave him a look as you ran your fingers up his neck from his collarbone “Wade, I know what you look like, don’t choose to be shy now of all times.”

“Yeah well, it’s just gonna ruin the mood we’ve got goin on here, kitten,” Wade said trying to distract you by pecking kisses up your neck.

“Wade, please. Let me take it off, it’s ripped anyway,” you said softly, earning you a sigh a defeat as he lifted his head for you.

You pulled the fabric over his face to reveal the scarred tissue beneath. You smiled at him and began kissing his cheeks, his forehead, his jawline, and finally his lips. “Now, undress me and  fuck me till I scream your name,” you whispered into his ear, referring to his teasing words.

He smirked “Gladly,” he said, pulling you out of your workout t-shirt, then your sports bra, and finally your spandex with your panties inside. Wade kissed from your neck down to your chest, stopping to flick a nipple with his tongue, then down your stomach to your heat. Forcing your legs apart, he looked up at you with a smirk before diving his tongue into your folds. You gasped at the pleasure that he gave with his motions.

“I found God

I found him in a lover.

Your legs shook with every swipe of his tongue and the hot coil inside you wrapped tighter and tighter, threatening to burst. “Wade, I need you. I need you inside me. Baby please” you begged, and he pulled his face away from your core with a smirk

“Well, since you asked nicely.” he said moving his hips to where his face used to be and kissing you roughly, tasting yourself on his lips. He positioned himself at your entrance and pushed himself in slowly “Fuck Y/N. Just- fuuuck” he moaned into you. You let out a moan of pleasure before nudging your heel into the back of his thigh, telling him you need more. He responded quickly and began thrusting into you, the sound of skin hitting skin melding with the sound of the music, the only noise rising above it was the sound of the two of you calling out each others names.

“W-Wade, I- I’m gonna-” you started, unable to finish your sentence.

“Come with me baby. Mmm, oh please just come with me,” he said with heavy breath and sloppy thrusts, holding the mat beneath you in a death grip. It was enough to send you over the edge into your release, him following quickly after. Sweat glistened on your foreheads as he pulled out of you, but kept his face in the nape of your neck.

“Can we do this every time I get a nightmare?” You chuckled.

The mercenary laughed against your skin “Definitely,” he said, rolling over to your side and wrapping his arms around you.

“I’m the king and you’re the queen and we will stumble through heaven

If there’s a light at the end, it’s just the sun in your eyes”

~*~*~*~*~

BONUS SCENE

The next morning Tony walked down the hallway to see that the door to the gym was left open. Odd. You were good about leaving things how they were when you worked out late at night. Of course, you and Wade had long since retreated to your room to fall asleep in privacy instead of sprawled out on the sparring mat. Tony peeked his head through the open door, looking around the gym until he spotted a pair of f/c pantie on the edge of the mat. He quickly assessed what had happened.

“Jarvis?”

“Yes sir?”

“Do me a favor and get this whole room sanitized.”

iquitelikeitthatway  asked:

omg, I love your first-son-stiles-stilinski verse. You should def write more in it. Maybe Stiles gets a stalker, MAYBE THAT STALKER BECOMES VIOLENT, WE JUST DON'T KNOW (pls write more)

(previously on first son stiles stilinski)

VIOLENT, YOU SAY.

Everything starts slowly falling into place after Stiles enrolls at Georgetown University. He hadn’t expected it to; he’d expected going to college would be weird, awkward, possibly even doomed to fail. The whole “being followed by a guy in a suit wherever I go” thing, as well as the “everybody and their grandmother knows all about my tragic backstory” thing, not to mention the “my dad is the current President of the United States” thing— it just didn’t exactly seem like the best way to excel either academically or socially, that’s all.

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the hanna lives au: sting rays

content warning: child neglect

  • okay so this is an au where that child abducting piece of garbage got hit by a car when root was like four or something and so nothing bad happened to hanna
  • hanna is fine
  • Hanna Is Alive
  • so root and hanna have been besties since the third grade when hanna did her book report on bees
  • root doesnt even like bees or the outdoors, but hanna’s so excited about it that root can’t help but be excited too
  • root goes up to her at recess and tells her she likes stingrays more but that she guesses bees are okay too
  • hanna’s not sure if they can be friends because bees are the greatest thing since fruit snacks
  • but root wins her over when she draws hanna a detailed diagram of like. a beehive. color coded and labeled and everything, with bee facts on the sides
  • root took the bus to the next town over because they have a better library and she traced it out of the big encyclopedia that takes up the entire desk
  • she worked on the colors for two whole days and root /hates/ coloring
  • it’s totally worth her cramping hands when hanna beams and hugs her really tight and shares her orange slices with her at lunch
  • root gets lunch for free through the school’s program but it’s always gross
  • hanna’s not big on citrus but she tells her parents she is so that root can always have some
  • they’re inseparable
  • all the teachers love them, and are pretty damn relieved
  • root was a notorious Problem Child To Watch Out For
  • nothing /too/ serious, according to the faculty: a lighter here, some unwashed clothes there, parent signatures rare to nonexistent
  • and root never really had friends before this, never socialized well
  • “well if anyone could befriend that little groves girl, it /would/ be hanna frey. she’s never met a single person she couldn’t charm with that smile. and she’s so sweet too!”
  • “i wonder how long she’ll stick around though”, the librarian mutters
  • the teachers aren’t sure if the librarian is referring to root or hanna
  • but they shrug an move on. there’s a faculty meeting in ten minutes
  • root has her first sleepover when she’s in the fourth grade for hanna’s birthday party
  • it’s root, hanna, and three other popular girls in school
  • hanna’s not necessarily a “popular girl”, but she’s the girl who’s so damn nice that she ends up being friends with everyone
  • it’s a pretty decent party, all things considered
  • hanna tames the popular girls so they aren’t little shits to root
  • root and the other girls mostly ignore each other, much to root’s relief
  • she still hasn’t quite managed to handle talking and interacting with large groups of people
  • she’s content to sit back and observe though
  • take mental notes
  • she makes lists in her head
  • girls talk about: hair boys school parents makeup
  • girls don’t talk about: computers stingrays encyclopedias
  • after they all watch an animated movie that root doesn’t understand the entertainment value of (“why was simba sad when his parents died?”) they all make a fort in hanna’s room and get ready for bed
  • hanna and the other girls have nice nightgowns to change into. root has an oversized t shirt
  • they tilt their heads at each other but hanna diffuses the tension by flicking the lights off
  • one of the girls brings out a flash light
  • “we should play truth or dare!” “spin the bottle” “don’t be dumb there’s no boys here”
  • tons of giggling and then a sleepy root
  • she pulls her blanket up to her chin “hanna can i go to sleep?”
  • this gets a few sighs out of the other girls, but hanna smiles gently and says “sure thing root”
  • “mkay. happy birthday hanna”
  • she falls asleep to muffled laughs and “so who’s your crush” “isn’t mrs pratt just /the worst/” “and i wanted to go to corpus, but my mom said–”
  • root wakes up in the morning to hanna gently shaking her awake
  • “c'mon dork, my dad made pancakes!”
  • “not a dork” root grumbles, burrowing deeper into the blankets and hanna’s side
  • “you drooled all over my hair”
  • “sorry?”
  • “no you’re not”
  • root shrugs a little. she’s not
  • she follows hanna downstairs and eats a shitton of pancakes and bacon
  • one by one the girls get picked up by their moms until it’s just root left
  • it gets so late that she and hanna eat lunch together too
  • (hanna sneaks them both some leftover birthday cake)
  • “do you need us to take you home, sweetheart?”
  • “no. i’ll walk if you need me to go now. i know i’ve been here a while”
  • “bless your heart honey, it’s honestly no trouble at all!”
  • “momma says nothing that comes after ‘bless your heart is true or nice’”
  • hanna’s parents blink a little and side eye each other
  • they aren’t super fond of root but shes the only one of hanna’s friends that doesn’t screech and giggle
  • plus hanna never shuts up about her
  • “i can walk her home, mom!”
  • “NO” root and hanna’s parents interject simultaneously
  • root doesn’t really live in the nicest area
  • and root’s not even sure if she’s gonna crash in her own place tonight
  • the library storage room is warmer
  • hanna sighs reluctantly and walks root to the door
  • she hugs root super tight and maybe holds her a little longer than socially appropriate
  • even root notices
  • “i think you’re supposed to let go now. i counted the seconds. it’s been 10.”
  • “shut up and hug me back smarty pants.”
  • so root does
  • it’s nice, she thinks. shes not really used to people hugging her
  • she wonders if she’s actually warmer that night in the library or if she just imagined the whole thing
Fic: Constants

For this prompt from @renaroo: 85 - McCree/Hanzo

Warning for injury, and some angst.


CONSTANTS

Hanzo takes a bullet for him on a Thursday.

It’s ridiculous, McCree thinks, because if anyone should be taking bullets it’s him, the guy in the line of fire who is supposed to be shot at. It’s been his role since Blackwatch: be colorful, attract fire, send it right back at them before they get a lucky shot. People like Hanzo are supposed to stay their distance, to deal with assholes who are too distracted by McCree’s bright red serape to notice a flutter of gold ribbon in the air. It’s how it’s worked. It’s how it’s supposed to work. McCree gets shot at, McCree shoots back. McCree gets shot at, Hanzo shoots back.

Not McCree gets shot at, Hanzo takes the bullet for him.

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anonymous asked:

MSR 10?

sry i went a little nuts and this morphed into something other then what i intended but it runs on a deadalive-empedocles timeline

10. “I needed someone and… you were the only one I thought of.”

April, 2001

i. 

It’s taken her nearly eight years to believe in the impossible, and it’s still easy to revert to old habits. She believed for Mulder when it seemed vital, when it was imperative that if he couldn’t be there that someone be there to fill his role in his life’s work, to take his place, but she didn’t believe when it really was vital. She never imagined him coming back from the dead, always thought it was impossible. If she ever imagined them raising the baby together, she imagined a reality where he never left and her life didn’t crumble to dust. 

She tries to tell him early the morning after their reunion, but she can tell he’s already noticed. He’s quieter, won’t meet her eyes. “Mulder, I got my miracle,” she tries, immediately regretting the singular pronoun. She slips her fingers through his, and lifts his heavy hand to press against her abdomen. 

“I’m happy for you,” he says, almost devoid of any emotion, and that’s when she feels like she’s lost him again. 

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ian’s enthusiasm for christmas is unparalleled.

[chicago pd series part 7 - 2537 words - ao3]

Mickey woke up warm, way warmer than he should be on a chilly winter night in his apartment with its shitty-ass heating, but that’s because Ian was a fuckin’ human furnace, his body sprawled completely over Mickey and his breath hot and soothing against Mickey’s neck. Ian loved to wrap himself around Mickey in the middle of the night, his long limbs touching Mickey practically everywhere, and he had pretended to hate it, but Ian wasn’t stupid. He knew Ian felt the way Mickey pulled him closer, the way Mickey breathed in the smell of his hair and his skin and all that other sappy bullshit that became magnified in the soft moments before he drifted off to sleep, when it seemed like nothing else mattered anyways, when his brain was fuzzy and too wrapped up in Ian to care.

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