and now i can't stop laughing about it

Being autistic isn’t always ‘cute, quirky things’, like knowing a hundred random facts about forensic pathology because it was my special interest in the sixth grade; or not knowing pop culture references because I didn’t watch that tv show, I was too busy reading books on forensic pathology.

But it’s always, constantly, that near panic fear of -

Oh no, they’re looking at me, why are they looking at me?

It’s my turn to talk!

What do I say?

Is this the right speaking volume?

Am I talking too fast?

Are these the right words?

Do I sound intelligent enough for the people I’m talking to?

Am I using too many big words?

Am I over explaining?

Wait, how’s my volume?

Oh shoot, I was distracted by my volume and I used a big word and now everyone’s laughing at me.

Why is their forehead creased? Are they mad? Is that a happy crease?

Why am I waving my hands so much?

I need to stop waving my hands.

Great, now everyone is staring at my hands.

Okay, great, I think this conversation is over!

Oh, no, wait, they’re talking again.

Look them in the eye.

No, wait, that’s too much eye contact.

Uhhhhh …

We’re done?

We’re done, whew. Another social interaction over.

8

After the scene in the woods my grandma called me up and said “Jon..“ you know and she’s like ”you shouldn’t be sleeping with that woman in the woods, she’s married! And you’re getting married, too!“ 

Ayato vs. Subaru Mini Drama
Ayato (CV. Midorikawa Hikaru) & Subaru (CV. Kondo Takashi)
Ayato vs. Subaru Mini Drama

[ Versus Song Requiem(2) Bloody Night Vol.I ]

Ayato vs. Subaru Mini Drama Translation

ヽ(・ω・ゞ) Good evening, dear sinners~! This track got requested a lot, so here it is! Now that I finished Yuma’s DF route, I’m gonna start completing the random requests in my spreadsheets. _(┐「ε:)_ I’m not sure if this has been done already, so my apologies if it has (I searched around and didn’t find anything).

As usual, audio translating isn’t my forte, so I apologize if I misheard or anything.

Note: I used “You” throughout the translation’s action phrases that you’ll see in parenthesis. It was easier that way, so don’t hurt me please.

The mini drama is about 18min. ☆ミ(o*・ω・)ノ Enjoy these two rough mouths~




(Struggling Noises; Wind’s Blowing As Subaru’s Flying)



Subaru: Geez, you’re such a pain!  I told you to stop moving. Don’t you understand!? Someone as stupid as you should know what’ll happen if you try to separate from me now. Hah? Well, if you wanna fall, be my guest. Ahh, but it wouldn’t be bad seeing you like a squashed tomato after falling to the ground. Heheh.



Subaru: Hey, what’re you gonna do? *fixes grip on Subaru* Heheh, you should’ve done that from the start. You really are a pesky woman. Oi, cling to me more. Tch, more!



Subaru: That’s it. That’s better. Your neck’s finally close. Heh…Ah? Damn it. Pisses me off seeing that guy’s fang marks. Hah? Don’t play dumb. It’s obvious what I gotta do. *bites and sucks*


Keep reading

  • *in the Defenders' hideout aka Colleen's dojo*
  • Colleen: *sees Luke Cage walk into the room and smiles when she gets an evil idea*
  • Colleen (to Misty): Misty, don't say anything to Luke. Just watch this.
  • Misty: Wait, what are you-
  • Colleen: Hey Danny! You mind telling Luke about your new favorite thing you discovered about America? (whispering to Misty) Just watch this.
  • Danny (opens his eyes and stops meditating): OOH, I'd love to! Hey Luke, Colleen introduced me to coffee!
  • Luke (suspicious): ...she did?
  • Danny: Yup, we weren't allowed to enjoy coffee back at K'un L'un. But now, I can't help myself! I've already gotten coffee with Colleen, Claire, Trish, Jessica, Karen, Malcolm, Matt, Elektra-
  • Luke: WITH MATT?
  • Danny: Um...yeah? He was thirsty. Anyways, you wanna get some coffee?
  • Luke: Uhhhh-
  • Danny: Colleen and Claire can get coffee with us!
  • Luke: UHHHHHHHH.
  • Colleen and Misty: *laughing their asses off in the back, with Misty high-fiving Colleen*

anonymous asked:

I just thought about Team Voltron stopping at a planet with rain and Lance is just so happy and he's running around laughing with his helmet off and everyone is smiling at him bc "awww" but PSYCHE IT WAS DANGEROUS ACID SPACE RAIN and Lance is sad bc now he can't enjoy it ("LANCE WTF YOU'RE GONNA GET YOUR FACE MELTED OFF AND GO BLIND" "BUT IT'S RAAAAAIIIIIIIIN, I WANNA STAY IN THE RAAAAAAIIIIIIIN")

AHHHHHHHHH

“Alright paladins, this planet is a neutral place. We must get them on our side in our fight against the Galra.” Allura’s face appeared in front of where Lance was sitting in Blue. 

“Of course Princess. We won’t let you down!” Everyone could hear the smile in Shiro’s voice and everyone mumbled in agreement. 

Allura gave everyone a final smiled and cut the video. Lance leaned his head back against Blue, only half listening to the plan that Shiro was covering yet again.  

Lance looked out of Blue, watching the planet get closer by the tick. It was a smaller planet, almost the size of Mars. It had a bluish color and a light purple surrounded it. White clouds spotted the atmosphere and Lance could only think of Earth. I miss home and rain. He leaned back into his chair, his eyes slightly shutting. I wonder what everyone is doing right now. How old is everyone? How many things have changed? Are the garlic knots still the same? Lance was pulled out of his thoughts by Blue shaking slightly as she descended into the atmosphere following the other lions. 

“Is everyone ready?” Shiro’s calming voice moved over the coms. 

Everyone shouted out an affirmative and Lance took in a few breaths as he landed on the pastel blue surface. 

-

Lance stretched his arms above his head, feeling his muscles burn at the intense pull. “Man that meeting was longgggggggggg.” 

Hunk smiled and patted his best friend on the back. “Yeah it was but at least we got the alliance.” 

Lance nodded at his friend and made his way outside, watching the species quickly move around. I wonder why they all look in a rush? “Hey Hunk w-” Before Lance could finish his sentence thunder exploded from above the two boys. Almost immediately small drops of what appeared to be water started to fall down on them. Rain?! He stuck his hand out, letting the liquid hit his palm. It’s raining, it’s actually raining. “Hunk it’s raining!” 

Hunk gave Lance a joyful smile and stepped closer to the building they had just exited as the rain started to fall faster. 

Lance considered joining his friend but decided against it. He wanted to enjoy this as long as he could. He stuck his arms straight out, letting the liquid roll off his armor and started to spin slightly. He closed his eyes and imagined home. He imagined dancing in the rain with his siblings or running home from a friends house when the dark clouds snuck up on him. 

Lance was overcome with homesickness and he felt a small lump form in his throat the longer he stood in the rain. I miss home. He started to fight back tears from falling down his face as it started to rain harder. Why can’t I just go home? 

“LANCE! GET OVER HERE!” It was Keith and Lance snuck a glance at his teammates that were standing by Hunk. Except they didn’t look happy or content they looked scared. “COME ON LANCE!” Pidge cupped her mouth and screamed at the Blue paladin. 

Lance closed his eyes, letting his arms fall and slowly made his way over towards his teammates. As soon as he reached his team he was being patted down by Hunk with a towel. “Dude, it’s just some water. I’m not going to die.” 

“If only it was water Blue Paladin.” An older alien named, Olfue looked at Lance with big eyes. “It’s a mix of iddimeg and prupunamon, both are highly dangerous acids and will burn anything it touches. We have not adopted to the acid itself but we have been able to create building and over things to protect ourselves from it.” The stared at the ground, not meeting Lance’s gaze. 

Lance’s heart fell, I can’t even enjoy rain? He turned his attention back towards the falling acid and bite back a scream. “Well that would have definitely changed the song ‘Singing in the Rain’ am I right?” Lance cracked a smile, praying the team didn’t see how broken he was feeling at that moment. 

“Are you okay Lance?” Shiro placed his Galran hand on the boy’s shoulder. 

Lance looked out at the acid, “I just wanted to play in the rain. I just want to do something that reminds me of home.” 

Everyone shared a sad look with each other and Hunk pulled Lance in for a hug. “It’s okay to miss home, but maybe we can find a planet with actual rain. You know one that won’t burn your face off.” He smiled and Lance gave a weak smile in return. 

“Thank man.” Lance pulled away from his friend, keeping his eyes at the failing liquid. I just want to see my family again. 

My poor son :(

I hope you like it!!!

Thank you!!!!!

If (Modern) Jamie and Claire could text: Target Tampon Run Edition (for @anoutlandishidea)
  • Jamie: have a question
  • Claire: have an answer
  • Claire: probably
  • Jamie: ye always do
  • Jamie: what are yr thoughts on menstrual cups?
  • Claire: P(T*&T(^R*&#TRP*&#TGPR:IWEHFVFOC*&I
  • Claire: PIWUEGWOEUBGWIUEBGPWEGB
  • Claire: _DYING_
  • Jamie: it's a simple question ssnch
  • Jamie: for or against?
  • Jamie: waiting...
  • Claire: sry
  • Claire: i'm laugh n so hard cant tpe
  • Jamie : i have full faith in ye
  • Claire: okay okay
  • Claire: um...well...
  • Claire: What is...'never used one but they seem practical enough?'
  • Claire: I guess?
  • Jamie: good, i agree, thanks MND,
  • Jamie: see ye in a bit
  • Claire: WAIT WAIT WAIT, I THINK THE FUCK *NOT*!
  • Jamie: huh? i AM going to be home shortly
  • Claire: oh, come ON
  • Claire: you can't just drop a menstrual bomb and then saunter off without another word!
  • Jamie: I'm in the Target, lots to buy
  • Claire: WHY IN THE WORLD DID YOU URGENTLY NEED MY INPUT ON FEMININE PRODUCTS???
  • Jamie: well ye start your courses tomorrow, aye?
  • CLaire: (I shouldn't be surprised but damn me, it gets me every time)
  • Claire: IF YOU SAY IT, IT MUST BE TRUE
  • Jamie: aye
  • Jamie: 10:47 am. Be ready
  • Claire: JHRCCCCC, like a weatherman
  • Jamie: but anyhow, we'll be leaving for Auntie Jocasta's camper Gathering-stravanza in the morning
  • Jamie: and as it'll be Monday before we return
  • Jamie: it seemed wise to stock up
  • Claire: you are absurd
  • Claire: and a very useful man to have around
  • Claire: thank you, darling
  • Claire: ...but wait, what's the cup business?
  • Jamie: WELL, YE SEE
  • Claire: oh lord
  • Jamie: since Brianna AND Lizzie AND Marsali have all been in the house these last few days
  • Jamie: i'm expecting somewhat of a collective epidemic
  • Jamie: so, I thought it best to be prepared for an outbreak, since we'll be out in the mountains
  • Claire: supremely practical
  • Jamie: but tampons are j(*(&^(*^%(&^$(&(*_)*ing expensive
  • Jamie: and buying enough for four grown women was just more than i could bear
  • Jamie: and so the wee cup seemed an ingenious solution.
  • Jamie: so i've got four in the cart
  • Jamie: all set
  • Claire: CACCCCKKKKLLLLLLLLINNNNNGGGGGG
  • Jamie: ?
  • Jamie: Why?
  • Jamie: makes sense, aye?
  • Claire: wel
  • Claire: YES
  • Jamie: so....?
  • Claire: I will pay GOOD MONEY
  • Claire: for the pleasure of watching you explaining to YOUR DAUGHTERS why EXACTLY you were thinking about their menstrual health economies
  • Claire: I will pay DOUBLE to see you actually explain the FUNCTION
  • Claire: poor lizzie probably would FAINT from shock
  • Jamie: they're smart lasses, they dinna need an explanation. I"ll just leave them out for them
  • Claire: [o4htnpqeubrg[q9834htbpqieybgriaeurj
  • Jamie: SSNCH YE MUST STOP THAT
  • Claire: YOU'RE JUST GOING TO LEAVE THEM ABOUT
  • Claire: AS LITTLE UNEXPLAINED GIFTS??
  • Claire: LIKE FATHER CHRISTMAS???
  • Claire: FATHER...LADY BUSINESS??
  • Jamie: ye're laughing now
  • Claire: YOU BET YOUR SWEET GINGER ARSE I AMMMM
  • Jamie: but i'll be keeping a ledger of the savings over time
  • Claire: No no no non orijgnpqeirg
  • Claire: IT IS TOOOOO MUCHHHHHH
  • Jamie: and we'll just see, wont we?
  • Claire: JAMIE
  • Claire: JAMIE YOU'RE DESTROYING ME
  • Jamie: oh,wait...
  • Claire: I CANNNAAAAAAAA
  • Jamie: son of a BANNOCK
  • Claire: what?
  • Jamie: I canna get these
  • Claire: WHAT??
  • Claire: NO!! YOU CAn'T BACK OUT NOW!!!
  • Claire: THE COST SAVINGS, JAMIE!!!! THE SAVINGSS!!!!
  • Claire: (honestly dying over here)(screenshotting this to everyone i know)
  • Jamie: because I've just looked at the product name and it's called
  • Jamie: ughjjih it just makes me want to gag
  • Claire: what?
  • Claire: Pussy Pot?
  • Claire: Blood Bucket?
  • Jamie: dinna be crass
  • Claire: oh, so you're grossed out because it uses anatomical terms??
  • Claire: Jamie, 'VAGINA' is a perfectly natural
  • Jamie: HUSH
  • Jamie: I'm fashed because it's called a
  • Jamie: 'Diva Cup'
  • Claire: ....so?
  • Jamie: SO??
  • Jamie: that's the most patronizing garbage of a name i've ever heard!
  • Jamie: why does a practical contraption for managing a woman's courses need to be loaded wi' the implication of being SASSY and OVERBEARING and such?
  • Jamie: it's most often used in a sexist, disparaging context to criticize strong women
  • Jamie: and so to put it on a useful product such as this is just
  • Jamie: eirjngpqirbg
  • Jamie: it's revolting
  • Claire: I ....
  • Claire: have never loved you more than I do right now.
  • Claire: How about we order a generic brand on Amazon?
  • Jamie: they have other brands?
  • Claire: yep!
  • Claire: whole selection of NONPATRONIZING VAGINA VASES
  • Jamie: see, I kent you were a practical woman, too, ssnch
  • Jamie: I'll start the spreadsheet when i get home
  • Claire: i don't doubt you will
I can’t even right now

J*nerys-stans and co were so desperate to discredit us “delusional crackshippers” that they took some random interview on some random blog with  zero credentials, something that seemed fishy to anyone who took 5 minutes to clearly think about it, but instead they just swallowed it like a bowl of dramatic rice, because they were so excited about proving that other people are “delusional” and I just can’t. This morning there were dozens of posts celebrating that the “delusional jonsa stans will finally shut up about their delusional crack ship” and now they’re the ones whining about being called delusional and how unfair and inappropriate that is and, fuck, payback’s a bitch. Like, you gotta appreciate the fucking irony of the situation.

Never forget the blessed Halloween of 2k17 when antis got a taste of their own medicine. The dramatic rice remember. 

Kuro 107.5: in which Vincent...

Is this super hot dude with this cool and mysterious aura…

Swirling his wine sophistically…

And debating philosophically about the ways of life…

Showing without a doubt his brilliant mind and instin–

…..

Vincent… I really tried to believe in you…

Surprisingly Simple

I was surprised and pleased recently to get a fun little prompt from @artbylexie! Her prompt was simply “Kiss Cam.” I had fun with this, and partly because I enjoyed using a setting that’s quite literally close to home hehe. Someday, Lexie…someday you will come to Boston and we will do all the fun things! (Not that this will be one of them lol!) Anyway, this one’s for you. ❤️ And hope you all enjoy it! 


“I’m confused,” Sherlock said to Molly, his voice raised a bit over the noise level around them. “I fail to see how this is an acceptable way to say thank you for my finding out who was embezzling in my client’s business!”

“I think it’s absolutely brilliant that he gave us these tickets!” she responded while applauding the game along with the rest of the fans as she sat decked out in her Red Sox hat and hoodie. “I mean, how often will we get the chance to do this? Be here in Boston at a baseball game!”

Sherlock shrugged. “I still prefer actual England to New England, thank you very much.”

“Stop complaining,” Molly chided with a laugh. “Besides, he did actually pay you as well. This was just an added bonus! Oh gosh, not to mention the incredible food he recommended!”

Sherlock did have to admit the food was nothing to sniff at. Giacomo’s was incredible Italian dining; as good or maybe even better than Angelo’s, though that seemed disloyal to say aloud. And the cannoli at Mike’s Pastry definitely ended up being worth the twenty minute wait in line. Perhaps they could stop by there again before flying home…

Molly nudged him, pointing toward the baseball field to playfully indicate that he should pay attention.

He also had to admit that the company on this case hadn’t been half bad. In fact, it was just about as wonderful as he could possibly imagine.

There was something rather freeing about being so far from home with Molly; far from anything that had happened recently. It was like they were able to step out of real life for a moment and into a world where everything that was difficult and confusing simply didn’t exist. It was a bit of a blessing in disguise that John hadn’t felt he should leave Rosie for that long or go that far away. This time with Molly had been…perhaps a bit therapeutic. Things hadn’t felt quite this light and comfortable since long before the events surrounding his poor troubled sister.

Events which he admittedly should have spent a little more time talking through with her.

Molly had been, if anything, too kind. He suspected she was being gentle with him because of the painful events which had resurfaced from his past. Perhaps it was cowardly, but he took the out she offered, choosing not to disagree when she excused his words during that phone call and the perceived impending danger. They’d both carried on as if the whole matter had been settled…even if  he knew it wasn’t, not really.

Molly began swaying side to side in her seat as a song played over the loudspeakers between plays (this game was truly tedious). It was vaguely familiar to Sherlock but Molly seemed to know the words and was softly singing along.

“Kiss me, down by the broken tree house…”

Just then, Sherlock looked up and saw- what in God’s name?

“M-Molly,” he sputtered, nudging her and pointing up to the jumbotron. “Molly, is there a reason there’s a camera on us?!”

She gasped when she looked up and saw the same thing. “Oh my God, we’re on the Kiss Cam!” she exclaimed, laughing and turning beet red.

“The what Cam?!” he questioned, though a couple seconds of deduction were all he needed to get a pretty clear grasp of the situation, and if he had any apprehension, the people clapping and cheering around them would have left no doubt. Oh dear…

Molly began laughing nervously and shaking her head, gesturing between herself and Sherlock. “N-no, we’re not- we’re just friends! Just friends!” she explained loudly amongst the cheering. “I don’t think we would ever…it’s- it’s sort of complicated!”

Sherlock sat there gaping and wide eyed, though that one word did make him pause and look over at her. Complicated. Did it have to be?

His eyes swept her face, red and flustered as she tried to smile but was clearly becoming more and more embarrassed by the whole situation. She chewed her pink lips nervously and was barely able to make eye contact with him as she turned to him and mouthed the word, “sorry.” But he couldn’t help but think, why should she be? If things were complicated between them, it certainly wasn’t her who had made it so. Perhaps he was the one who should be apologizing. Or maybe…maybe he should do something else entirely.

His decision made in a flash, Sherlock gently turned her head toward him while removing the baseball cap from her head, and then he pressed his lips unhesitatingly against hers. Somewhere in his head he registered the fact that the crowd had erupted in cheering and applause, but it wasn’t his main focus.

Sherlock melted against the instant warmth and comfort of her mouth and felt a new and wonderful sort of thrill when her hands came up to grasp his face and she began enthusiastically kissing him back. They were in their own little world for a few blissful moments.

They soon pulled back though, very briefly glancing up at the jumbotron again as the screen finally switched away from them, and then looked at each other again.

“Well,” Molly began, letting out a short laugh, “I guess it’s even more complicated now, isn’t it?”

Sherlock smiled, enjoying the way her eyes had brightened and knowing it had been his doing.

“Actually,” he said, affectionately brushing some hair behind her ear before placing the cap back on her head, “I believe it’s finally incredibly simple.”

youtube

Ignore the Nnobody’s desperate publicity stunt AND go to 18:12. Eisen asks “HOW MANY KIDS DO YOU HAVE?” The Nnobody: “THREE” And Nods.
Then Eisen goes “and you’ve got a ten-month-old?” and Nnobody goes repeating “10-month-old” clearly without knowing ANYTHING about it. (Also that’s not accurate but let’s leave that aside)


SO the Nnobody is saying, in VERY clear and certain terms that he has THREE children.

Now let’s analyze. First off, even if you’re completely stupid and buy that he has two kids with Kerry (WHICH HE DOES NOT), this makes ME yet again CORRECT about the little girl he fathered AND ABANDONED, together with her baby mama, years ago (I think she’s now 11 but I need to check her birth date). So, at a BARE minimum, I repeat if one’s so damn stupid as to believe he has two kids with Kerry there’s a third one that I WAS RIGHT about of course, that he had BEFORE any fake marriages took place. That he abandoned, was sued and obliged to take a DNA test for, and all that.

There’s a little problem here though. There’s ANOTHER child out of wedlock that he fathered that I know for a fact of, a little boy who is now probably around 5 or 6, whose baby mama followed him to Philly for, and who was also completely abandoned and that he didn’t want to pay child support for. He has NEVER even seen the child. He was sued there too and the records are sealed. And one of the material witnesses in hte trial was a former player who was HIS BOYFRIEND in Philly while he supposedly was with this “baby mama” (yes you read that right, children mean nothing, STILL GAY!)

So the math here doesn’t add up. Even if he was suddenly acknowledging his children out of wedlock that he abandoned bc he is a deadbeat as we have ALWAYS known, and he was STILL pretending to ever have been anywhere near Kerry in terms of fathering children, it would be FOUR.

So… is there a THIRD child out of wedlock that we never heard of?

Because that appears like the most likely possibility here. Naturally the haters will now say he was referring to the girl and Kerry’s children, after having insulted all of us TELLING THE TRUTH about his deabdeat ass for years.


But hey… I’ll be over here, sipping my tea. Their ship is being quickly sunk by the Nnobody himself AND I am being proven right by the Nnobody himself. First about the fact he OF COURSE was broke and lost all of his NFL money, now we’re on to him being a deadbeat.

Get that popcorn because this type of thing  is never coincidental. It’s most likely deliberate.

Also: @ikonics44 called stuff about this film as the turning point MONTHS ago. Kudos to her bc she may WELL have been completely right.

okay but
  • After watching “10 Things I Hate About You”, Evan teasingly called Connor “Patrick” for a few days.
  • “It’s the hair, isn’t it?”
  • “And other things.”
  • Some of those other things included how Connor can somewhat carry a tune when Evan heard Connor sing “Can’t Take My Eyes Off You” a week later.
  • “It’s your fault I can’t get the damn song out of my head.”

Bonus:

  • They sneak onto campus after they graduate and Connor reenacts this scene while Jared, Zoe and Alana provide the not-so-harmonious background music. Evan can’t stop laughing. 

anonymous asked:

Hi! Have you seen latest news? "Liam Payne says we'll never get to see his son". Wow. I can't stop laughing, seriously.

Hi anon

Yeah, it’s this video.  If the timestamp doesn’t work then it’s at 56 seconds.

I’m also screaming that earlier on at 6 seconds onwards the interviewer talks about how the IG story on Saturday (with C) and that “ we saw your instagram story about how happy you were, you probably can’t believe your life right now”

Liam’s face at that moment. (also HI PADDY)

and Liam replies, “I know it’s very crazy isn’t it, I don’t know how I end up in these places but I do.” 

I mean.  

For the sake of completeness and transparency, he does then go onto say in response to the interviewer asking.

“Have you any advice for people to be as happy as you are.”

And Liam replies “Just keep going cause sometimes you just get lucky.” which he follows with a small laugh.

anonymous asked:

So I was just writing something about Radcliffe and I accidently typed Fadcliffe and now I can't stop laughing rip me

radcliffe hops on a band wagon - fadcliffe

radcliffe adopts some kids - dadcliffe

radcliffe does something evil - badcliffe

radcliffe doesn’t get what he wants - sadcliffe

radcliffe is angry with someone - madcliffe

radcliffe was once a young boy - ladcliffe 

Agents of Game Grumps
  • Fitz: Hey Daisy.
  • Daisy: What?
  • Fitz: Can I share something with you from earlier today?
  • Daisy: What is it, Fitz?
  • Fitz: Well, I sent you a text early in the morning.
  • Daisy (starts chuckling): Yeah.
  • Fitz: Because I have to go out of town with Jemma for one weekend this month. And so I was like...I won't give specific dates, but I was like..."Do you have any preference whether I go, uh this weekend or the next weekend?". Your response. *Laughs* At 930 in the morning.
  • Daisy: *can't control laughter*
  • Fitz (reading Daisy's text): "Mother fucking Jesse Eisenburg Jesus Christ fUck dude mothEr fUcking Facebook movie bullshit jesus Can you fucking bElieve this shIt
  • Daisy: *can't stop laughing*
  • Fitz (stunned): No...no...no punctuation. RaNdom caPitaliZatioNs. So I respond "I have no idea what we're talking about right now". 45 minutes pass. I get a text from you.
  • Fitz (reading Daisy's 2nd text): "Goddamn creator of Facebook and fucking lawyers and shit right? fuckin' Winklevoss twins goddamn rowing the boat FUCK YO' SHIT! I can't even fucking believe this shit, have you seen this shit? Fuck, I just watched this shit. Fuck Jesse Eisenburg man."
  • Daisy: *Dying of laughter*
  • Fitz: I respond "Daisy, you're scaring me". An hour passes, you respond, "Mother fuckin' Hacksaw Ridge! Hacksaw Ridge! You put in the time FUCK! Put in the time! Motherfucking built shit with his bare hands! Fucking best friend shit Jesse Eisenburg...I'm very tired..."
  • Daisy: *starts choking from her laughter*
  • Fitz: I'm just like, "No prob, I'll... I'll do most of the talking at the meeting with Coulson today...". IMMEDIATE like response, I'm talkin' like 5 seconds later.
  • Fitz (reading Daisy's last text): "No man I'll just talk about the Facebook movie all day! Shit man! You have to be so interested in the shit I have to say about the Facebook movie, Fuck dude! I just watched it a year and a half ago, Fuck Jesse Eisenburg man! He fucked over Hacksaw Ridge crazy Winklevoss twins rowing...Trent RESIN OR did the soundtrack, Fuck this guy! Who invented Facebook? I don't like dying. I can't think of who the fuck invented Facebook, All I can think is the guy who played the guy who invented Facebook. WHO THE FUCK INVENTED FACEBOOK?!?"
  • Fitz: And then, in all capital letters, TWO hours later.
  • "MARK ZUCKERBERG!!!!!!
  • Daisy and Fitz: *laughing their asses off*
  • Mack, Yo-Yo, May, Coulson, Jemma, and Robbie: ...dafuq is going on with them?

there is bubblegum all along my jaw,

stuck in the peach fuzz of my face 

post-bubble explosion another mess

we can pretend was never made 

and maybe if we were still 

in the sixth grade we could laugh it off,

pretend like it was all sticky-sweet 

soft and pink, young love on a blacktop 

with the teachers watching,

but I am more anxious now and you

are always cataclysmic,

the POP stops my heart 

in the same way bus brakes do.

Stop, Stop, Stop-

but even older you don’t understand 

and can’t take responsibility 

for the messes you can abandon,

the messes that still cling to me. 

- double your pleasure, double your fun || O.L.