and my teacher made it worse

First Servamp and aromatherapy project art! It’s Lawless and Ylang-ylang! (I wrote the Latin name wrong tho) :D
This art is dedicated to my Filipino friends who has Law-chan as their special boy, @reimeijennoir and @petrichor-note :D

So there’s a little story about me and aromatherapy candles. It just about my own greedy self who caused my own depression, don’t feel sorry for me, haha

Keep reading

Going to school in a predominantly Christian area includes:

1. Rebellious fist grade club of secret Pokémon. We designed our own so that our parents wouldn’t catch on

2. “Hey, have you read Harry Potter yet?” “No, I’m not allowed to, my mom thinks it’s satanic.”

3. *singing* “Father Abraham, had many sons.”

4. Pure terror the first time one of my friends said they were not a Christian and me crying because they were going to hell.

5. I struggled to stay focused in class, so the teacher’s solution was big, clunky, embarrassing head phones that just made it worse (second grade)

6. The first time one of your friends goes “hey, wanna hear a bad word?” And you feel a sinking pit of shame in your stomach

7. “Hey, you’re smart, is ketchup a smoothie?”

8. “See you in church!” Then later, “see you in school!”

9. Veggie Tales.

10. The first time one of your friends come out to you and you have to protect them from the kid who is convinced that to turn him straight we just need to douse him in holy water and exorcise him. (Slight exaggeration, but he did think that. Also that Steven universe was shoving the gay Agenda down people’s throats)

11. You never realize how many of your friends are catholic until Friday night sleepovers during lent.

12. Talking our parents’ politics in fourth grade.

13. They take you to a church during an evacuation.

14. Your sixth grade bible study is the most lit.

15. “Oh wheeeeeeerrrrrrrrreeeeee is my hairbrush?” chorus response back of “oh WHEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEE IS MY HAIRBRUSH!?!”

I’m so upset. Today this kid (who I will be honest, do not like very much) pulled out a fidget toy that I use. I instantly got so excited and kinda happy for him because I could tell that he was putting in an effort to try and pay more attention then he usually does. A few periods later, he pulled out a small thing of play dough, and started playing with it, but still obviously paying attention to the lesson. I was so excited that there was another student who publicly used fidget toys, until my teacher stoped the lesson and went “will you please put that away? This is high school, not kindergarten, we don’t play with play dough here!”. This called a public attention to it, and he hurried to put it away as a bunch of people started laughing and whispering. I was so close to saying something, but anything I said would have made it worse for him. I hope that he continues to use his fidget toys in other classes and I really hope that teachers start to be more sensitive about this stuff.

C-Puff’s deep dark Shameful past

For @captainphoe Who did not believe me. (these are a lot worse than I thought they were. I’m so sorry! Please ignore any comparisons I made!!)

Honestly… I had MUCH WORSE in the folder but I was WAY TOO ASHAMED to let anyone see those X’D I might one day show them buuuut.

Ok see I drew these before I was on DeviantArt. probably before DeviantArt was a thing. And I mostly drew them in class at high school while the teacher was lecturing because it helped me focus better. (It took a looooong time to train my teachers to let me draw while they talk) and honestly, apart from validation from my friends and family, I had no intention of showing these on the internets and even if I did I had very little concept of how many people were ON the internets. So a lot of them are SUPER SELF INDULGENT.

But even then you get a vague idea of “one day people will see these and give me attention I so crave!”

….too bad it’s now 15 years later and that attention was not the kind I would’ve wanted at the time X’D


Feast your eyes on the LEAST cringe pictures I could find.

I had a Sonic phase for maybe 3 months once. It wore off fast.
(Probably age 14 or 15 so around 2002 - 2003)

Deep meaningful Ratchet and Clank fanart to reflect my SOUL-PAIN.

And behold…

The “I can’t draw anime but I really like the style so let’s try do this “chibi” thing everyone’s doing on the internet also apparently I liked Final Fantasy 9 for maybe a week or something”

Please don’t make me post my horrible Ratchet and Clank Mary-Sue or my traced pictures or my “Edgy” drawings full of “angst”.

None of us will survive…

Here’s a pony I drew when I was 13.

I drew every single G1 pony. In order. That’s 800 drawings in the garage.

If I was a US History Teacher.....
  • Me: Okay class now why is tomorrow's date so important?
  • Student: *raises hand* Because its the anniversary of the Boston Tea Party thing, where the colonists dumped the tea into the harbor and made the British really mad.
  • Me: That is correct but who are we forgetting in that famous moment of US History?
  • Class: *silence*
  • Me: nobody?
  • Class: *more silence*
  • Me: man you guys are worse than Ubis-
  • Student: we're forgetting Conno-
  • Prick Student: *who doesn't raise his hand* Ya know, another history teacher told me that this "Connor" doesn't really exist and that your just a crazy old loon.
  • Me: That's exactly what the Templars want you to think child.
  • Class: *more silence*
  • Me: ANYWAYS don't forget your homework is to go on Youtube and watch Sequence 6 of AC3 for the Boston Tea Party. There will be a pop quiz on it tomorrow. :)))

I still struggle with compulsive lying because of how horribly I was treated by teachers and classmates for having ADHD.

I couldn’t make/keep eye contact with anyone and fidgeted a ton and often narrated my imagination as if what I was day dreaming actually happened to me and people misconstrued that as “lying” and it’s totally fucked me up because of how many times I was wrongfully accused of being a liar and how that only made my compulsive lying worse

i have to write an essay on why im “blessed enough to hear sound waves” and it the worst thing ive ever had to write. because i have sensory issues dealing with auditory input, sometimes i hate sound, so its kind of hard to write about how i love it. also, the way my teacher made it out to be made it sound kind of ableist to hoh people, as if their whole life is tragedy?

The Bad Boy & The Good Boy, Part 1

Meet Dean Winchester.

He’s a seventeen year old senior at Lawrence High School who has been the bane of every teacher’s existence for four years. Made all the worse by the fact that they can’t actually punish him for anything.  He hangs out with the smokers under the bleachers during gym, but they’ve never been able to catch him with a cigarette in hand.  He’s disruptive in class, but quiet after the first warning so he never gets sent to the principal’s office.  His homework, when he bothers to turn it in, is always half-assed, but he aces all his tests, essays, and projects so he’s passing everything with a solid B.  Not exactly a good reason to call for a parent-teach conference.  He’s cocksure and headstrong, but never crosses that line to flagrant disrespect with teachers so he’s never given detention. He chases the girls, he teases the nerds, and he picks fights with the jocks.  But no one has ever complained about his behavior going too far.

No, Dean’s never been busted for it, but everyone knows he’s a bad boy.

Meet Castiel Novak.

He’s a sixteen year old junior at Lawrence High School.  He transferred in at the beginning of the year and he’s been an absolute dream.  He’s polite, intelligent, inquisitive, and helpful. He gets along with everyone and is maintaining over a 4.0 grade point average due to his AP classes.  He’s quiet during class and raises his hands to answer questions.  He volunteers to tutor other students after school.  He doesn’t wear raggedy jeans and T-shirts like his peers, but dresses in ironed buttoned downs and pleated slacks, even though he does have an interesting piercing in the shape of in arrow going through both sides of the cartilage at the top of his ear.  He’s respectful to the girls, he’s kind to the nerds, and he’s tolerated by the jocks.

Castiel Novak has never caused trouble and everyone knows he’s a good boy.

Dean’s and Castiel’s parents attend the same Catholic Church, Our Lady of Mercy, but they’ve never met.  They have both heard about the summer program the church runs where exemplary teen congregation members are paired up with the rebels and troublemakers at a sleep away camp.  All boys, of course.  The Winchesters and the Novaks pack up their sons and ship them off for six weeks of sermons, hymns, team building exercises, and the hope that the experience will have a profound effect on the teens.

Dean is not happy about it because he’s graduated high school already, but he’s still seventeen so he has to do what his parents tell him.  Castiel is not happy about it because he had plans to visit his friends back home in New York City, but now he has to stay at a camp site forty-five miles away from Lawrence that butts up against the Kickapoo Reservation.

Their parents drop them off in the capable hands of the youth ministers and camp administrators.  The “bad” children and the “good” children are separated and given different introductory speeches.  The good children receive an encouraging homily on patience, good will, and how to relate to their “wayward buddy.”  The bad children receive a stern lecture about following the rules, returning to the fold, and how if they stray onto the reservation they are technically no longer in the United States and are at the mercy of the Tribal Government.

Everyone is given one set of long pants, one dress shirt, a tie, three pairs of shorts, and three T-shirts with the camp logo on it: white for the good kids, black for the bad.  They’re given a prayer book with selections from the Bible that the administrators feel are particularly pertinent.  They’re given one set of bed sheets and a slip of paper with their cabin number and their assigned partner.  They are instructed to find their cabins, make their beds, get dressed in shorts and T-shirt, and spend the next hour getting to know their partner before returning to the mess hall for lunch.

Dean walks quickly to his cabin, talking to another high school graduate who has participated in the camp for the past three years.  Castiel lags behind, dreading everything about the upcoming six weeks.  They arrive at cabin number three about two minutes apart.  Dean already has the lower bunk made with neat hospital corners and is changing into his uniform.  Castiel’s eyes sweep the room with disdain and he is irritated by the soft chatter of the seven other boys he’ll be living with for the summer.  He ignores his bunk mate and haphazardly puts the sheets on the bed, one corner slipping off and leaving the mattress exposed.  He crams the clothes into the top drawer of the two-drawer dresser at the end of the bunk bed, leaving out only the shorts and shirt he has to put on.

When they’re dressed in khaki shorts that are an awkward length on both of them, they turn and see who their partner will be.

Dean stares at Castiel Novak.  He knows who he is.  Even though they were in different grades at a large school, Dean knows exactly who the goody-two shoes, teacher’s pet with the brown nose is.

Castiel stares at Dean Winchester.  He only went to school with him for one year, but he knows who he is.  Castiel knows exactly who the bad boy, troublemaker, Casanova-wannabe is.

Castiel cocks his head as he looks at Dean and takes in the white color of the T-shirt he’s wearing.  Dean’s eyes are comically wide as he sees Castiel in a black T-shirt.


anonymous asked:

Im researching about my saturn in aries and its worse than I thought :( its pretty bad too like the degree is 2 and i relate to it a lot. But it got me so depressed. Not to mention other parts in my chart but i feel like my whole entire chart is made to keep me from progressing and to keep struggling with my self esteem :( I hope you're having a better day than mine...

Oh baby don’t say that. 💔
It’s completely normal to feel like that with Saturn. You can’t imagine how visibly worse my mood got while I was reading up on all my Saturn aspects, haha.
But Saturn is not bad - he doesn’t want to do you anything bad. The opposite, actually. Saturn wants you to be happy. But first he will make you strong. He is a teacher, and a harsh one, but boy will he help you if you let him. Saturn always puts restrictions on you, but restrictions aren’t inherently bad, you know? They show you where your limits are, where you can push them, they protect you and they give you some kind of orientation.
As with the rest of your chart - I really know how you feel. My chart used to frustrate me so so much as well. But you have to understand that astrology does not limit you. Nothing is set in stone. Yes, astrology gives you some traits, but you can work on those - a 12th house sun person can become more outgoing, a 1st house Neptune person can learn to understand who they are, a saturn-mercury person can learn to speak their mind openly and freely. Whenever you see something in your horoscope and think you can’t change that part then that’s you. Yes, you’ll always have that tendency, but that doesn’t mean shit in the end. Don’t let astrology dictate your life. Should you use it as a tool to get to know yourself better and to then improve? YES. Totally. Should you just accept every part of your horoscope even if you don’t like it? NO. Never.
It may be harder for you to get a stable and good self-esteem, but you can totally do it and it will be so worth it. Don’t be frustrated and hopeless, you got this. You have to believe in yourself, you know? 💛

I have decided after many years that I will pick up drawing again! (●´ω`●)

Art use to make me feel “whole”. I was really shy as a kid and drawing the only comfort I got from being in school. Slowly but surely I made friends with my classmates who complimented my work and wanted to see more.

I opened up more and was always excited to create something for my friends! I felt so happy inside when I watched their eyes sparkle and smile with amazement~

But as I got older I noticed other people’s amazing artistic potential. Some where way advanced to what I could do and was simply amazed. I started to lose confidence in myself when others pointed out the difference of my skill with others. One day in high school I over heard a couple girls saying how their art was “superior” and it made me feel like crap. Oh boy it only got worse when the art teacher would praise them constantly and show off their work to us saying “this is what we should be doing”. 

It has 6 years since I last drew something. After seeing how supportive artists can be on here it makes me want to try again. I want to sincerely thank the artists who post their works of Mystic Messenger art on tumblr because they are all amazing and it makes me smile so much and brings back the happy moments I did have when I draw.

When I have the free time I want to draw Zen’s dazzling smile as a warm up ≧◡≦


Playing Sims in my English class with no consequence?: coooll. So we had group presentations to make, we had to come up with a story, in English, about ‘Family Relations at Work’. Some people made a small play with their story, others just read their stories or googled images… me? I used Sims 2 to illustrate. After the rest of my group came up with the story and didn’t ask for my input (in the end I had to correct and re-write parts of it u_u ) I thought, nah I got this, it’s gonna be cool! 


Between looking for stuff I needed, make the lot and decorate it, get some sims and make them pose as I needed to, mount the power point, add dialogues and sounds…. I went 29 hours sleepless. I went to class looking like someone had ran me over and the teacher made a small storm over me for going up and beyond than what she had asked. Gee thanks. But in the end she said it had looked cool *shrug* So here are some of the images.

CC used: @maryannsims2 (Pascal, albeit modified, but she is the creator, he was the base for the 3 males actually) and @libertiin (Jenna) 
Clothes by @eir-ung
Miscellaneous garage stuff by SimTech2, AroundTheSims2, FreshPrince

 Now excuse me, while I go hibernating for the duration of the weekend.

"Students can't get bullied by teachers; it's impossible"

My 6th grade teacher hated me, constantly moved my desk so I couldn’t see the board, made it so every group project we had, I did alone, and on my birthday, she shook up orange soda then gave it to me, which ruined my new dress. Teachers are just as bad as students when it comes to bullying, and sometimes even worse.

Confession: I’m really tired all the shit I get because I’m a black girl with natural hair. One boy in my class went up to the teacher and said, “Look at [her] hair. She look like she got electrocuted.” It’s even worse when I see white people telling me that cultural appropriation doesn’t exist. If it doesn’t exist then why do I get made fun of for wear my hair natural but whenever I see a white girl on youtube imitate a black women’s natural hair, she gets praised for it?

Okay, so you know how when you turn on a mac, they make this loud start up sound if you’re volume was up when you turned it off?

Well, everyday in class, without fail, my computer made the loudest screeching out of all the others. So my teacher finally asked why. And I had to admit, in front of forty people, that the reason why my volume is always up so loud when I turn my computer off is because I have an EDM Power Hour before I go to bed.

At this point, the class is laughing hysterically because I’m the kid that only talks about pop-punk/alternative bands. And the teacher asks why I listen to that (and I quote) “harsh garbage” before bed. 

I then had to say that somehow, all those “harsh garbage” beats calm me down and help me sleep. 

The teacher called me Harsh Garbage the rest of the school year. And I called her Teaching Trash (behind her back, of course). But to her face, I called her by her first name. Sometimes even her middle name. 

I passed the class with an A+. 

you know those chinese finger trap things?

u know this one

I somehow didn’t encounter one until 3rd grade when a girl gave it to me and just said “put your fingers in this” with no other instruction assuming I knew what it was

I started freaking out and having a panic attack (this was before I even knew what that was so I thought I was dying) and the person who gave it to me wouldn’t tell me how to release myself and i had pulled it so tight it was cutting off the circulation to my fingers and was like pulling my fingers so far I thought I was gonna pull the joints apart which it made it 100000x times worse so eventually the teacher had to cut me free the girl got in trouble and i got to spend the rest of the day in the nurses recovering from my trauma

Nash Grier Imagine

(Requested by Cindy)

“Watch where you’re going nerd” Some random jock said to me as they shoved me into the wall of lockers next to me, my shoulder cracking slightly as I attempted to stand up again, this was a normal occurrence for me.. Luckily it never got much worse than being pushed into the lockers.
“You okay Cindy?” My friend asks, taking my bag from me for a few moments so that I could move my arm around to check that I wasn’t seriously hurt
“I think so, I think I’m just going to have a massive bruise later” I say shaking my head lightly and taking my bag back from her and making my way to homeroom.
“Alright class, I’ve decided we need to mix things up so I’ve made a seating plan” My teacher said, causing the entire class to groan
“Get over it people” My teacher said rolling her eyes and began to read out names, I decided to not really pay attention because there is no way for this to end well for me.
“Nash, you move next to Cindy” The teacher said, causing me to suddenly pay attention.. Oh god. Not Nash, I don’t want to get verbal abuse in here too… You see he’s the star quarterback and he’s a part of the jocks that give me all the crap.. I look over to see Nash high-fiving his friends before moving over to the empty seat next to me
“Hey, I’m Nash” He said, sitting down and sending me a smile
“I know” I mumble looking away from him, not trusting the smile on his face
“You’re Cindy I take it?” He says trying to continue some kind of conversation
“Yup, look you don’t have to try and be nice. I know this is some kind of bet with your friends and I’m not falling for it” I say, meeting his eyes quickly before turning back to look at my books.
“Woah” He said, looking like he was going to try and say something to me again but the bell rang signalling first period allowing me to escape homeroom and make my way towards the library, seeing as I have a free first thing in the morning 
“Hey Cindy wait up!” I hear a voice shout, I turn to see Nash trying to catch up with me, I roll my eyes and continue down the hallway
“Seriously Cindy wait!” Nash said catching onto my arm, I’m not sure why I thought I could out run him… Considering he’s the football star and I was walking down a hallway
“What Nash?! What could you possibly want? A tutor? Its a no from me.” I say clearly fed up with this entire conversation that hadn’t really begun
“What was that all about?? Why are you being so hostile? What did I do??” He asks, his blue eyes searching mine for some sort of answer
“Because you’re a jock. I’m a nerd, your little football posse push me into lockers and harass me! Why would you think I’d be okay with being anywhere near you!” I say, taking a step back from him and ripping my arm out of his grip
“What? Cindy I didn’t know they do that.. Why haven’t you told anyone?” He said, dropping his voice to a whisper and trying to take my hand
“Yeah because everyone likes a snitch don’t they?” I said laughing bitterly 
“Nash you have no idea what its like, everyone loves you” I say looking down
“They don’t.. But hey lets make a deal” He said
“Maybe” I said looking at him meeting his gaze
“I’ll get everybody off your back… and if it works will you let me take you out? You know to get to know you better?” Nash says, staring deeply into my eyes
“I guess” I said, dropping his gaze.. My cheeks burning red
“OH NASH, WHATCHA DOING WITH THE NERD MAN?” One of the other jock says coming up to us and pushing me
“Back the fuck off man” Nash says pushing the player harshly and coming over to help me up
“Are you okay?” He asks in a whisper, eyes running over my face, I nod looking at him in awe
“Right, all of you listen up. If ANY of you mess with Cindy or her friends again you’re going to have to answer to me okay?” Nash says, anger resonating through his words, everyone in the hallway nodding along with terrified expressions
“Good, now carry on” He said turning back to me
“So… about that date?” I say smiling at him