and just ask her already you jerk

[kara danvers] lena luthor? what a jerk i hate her i- why would i befriend a luthor- [trips] *thousands of photos of lena luthor spill from supersuit* what those? you- you guys know i’m a reporter, they’re for work- snapper- *frantically picking up photos* listen she’s bad- she’s probably going to destroy the entire city and me- *thousands more spill across floor* really they’re not mine i’m just holding them for j’onn he asked me to do surveillance i- *alex picks up photo* *alex is not impressed* i’m just holding them for j’onn it’s just surveillance just- wait, listEn  

Texting - Steve Rogers/Bucky Barnes
  • Two days away from home and Captain America was feeling pretty lonely. Sighing heavily, he looked at the stars through the window while Natasha drove in silence. Feeling his phone vibrate, he quickly picked it up, already imagining who'd be.
  • Jerk: Steve, there's a girl in our bed. Why there's a girl in our bed? OH MY GOD SHE'S NOT WEARING PANTS! STEVE THERE'S A GIRL WITH JUST LINGERIE IN OUR BED!
  • Steve smiled satisfied as he saw a picture of you with Bucky. Damnit, how he missed the two of you. He was counting the minutes to come back home and take care of his two troublemakers.
  • Steve: don't provoke me, I'm already homesick enough.
  • Jerk: Punk, we miss you like hell. And I'm horny.
  • Jerk: (Y/N)'s asking where's her daddy. I can't believe that she's drunk enough to forget that I'm an alpha too. Can I say that you asked for a video?
  • Steve: Bucky, can you be the voice of reason when I'm not at home?
  • Jerk: ... no?
  • Jerk: We gonna do a video. Wait.
  • Steve: christ, you two are going to be the death of me.
2

“So, where’s Y/N?” Dean asked his brother as he lay down on the bed. “Is she out getting food? Hopefully, she’ll get some pie. Unlike you, she remembers.”

“Um, about that Dean, she went out on a hunt on her own,” Sam replied. He knew that he shouldn’t tell his brother where you were but he didn’t want to lie to him.

Dean jerked up from where he sat.

“She’s doing what?” He asked hoping that Sam was lying.

“There was a simple salt n’ burn not too far from here. I already checked it out. Its fine, Dean.”

“Fine! Damn it, Sam! She could get hurt! Or worse she could get killed, Sam, and you let her go? You let her go on a hunt with checking with me!” Dean started pacing the room feeling around in his pockets to look for his phone. “Damn it.”

“Dean, just calm down, it was just an old lady that was haunting the residents of her old house. It’s not a vengeful spirit. She’ll be fine.”

“You don’t know that, Sam. You don’t know that,” he said shaking his finger as his brother.

“She was trained by the best, Dean. Just give it a couple of hours and she’ll be back here,” Sam said trying to calm his brothers whose breaths were coming out short and choppy. “But you’ll have to calm down, Dean. You’re going to have a heart attack.”

“That girl is going to be the death of me,” Dean whispered as he poured himself a glass of whiskey.

“You just need to go ahead and admit that you like that girl,” Sam mumbled.

“What do you mean by that, Sam?”

“You like her and the sooner you tell her the sooner…”

“Shut up, Sam,” Dean shot back and filled his glass up more. This was going to be a long couple of hours.

my heart’s on fire (2/?)

a/n: the response to my one-shot was kind of insane and the adorable potentialheartofdarkness and a lot of other lovely people asked me to continue the story, so I very excitedly did just that despite already working on two other stories. oh well, I can never have too much of these idiots. let me know what you guys think!

summary: having a new job is hard as it is, and now Professor Emma Swan has the added disadvantage of dealing with the jerk barista that never spells her name right. modern au.

ao3 | ff
one

chapter two

She’s in the middle of correcting a 12 page paper on Attachment Theory, her sixth paper of the day, when she becomes undeniably certain of the fact that she shouldn’t have opened that bottle of wine an hour ago - especially considering she’s nearly finished more than half of it already and the sentences on the page are all beginning to sound one in the same. She heaves out a deep sigh into her wine glass as she considers how easily half of the theories in the syllabus can be applied to her; evidently, it’s kind of ironic, but it’s conclusively her fault she opted to dive into Social Psychology.

(She isn’t proud to admit that she’d cried more than a handful of times while working on her first research paper over the years - some of those topics had just hit too close to home.)

A break is what she needs, and at this moment, she’s glad for Elsa, her assistant professor, who’d opted to take over half the workload for the weekend. She puts down the paper on the coffee table in front of her and settles back into the couch, turning her head slightly to the left towards the window and reveling in the surreal hues of pinks and yellows and blues that paint the approaching dusk.

Emma had found the apartment barely a day prior to her move, stumbling upon a listing on a site she’d sworn she’d visited at least twenty or so times - it was pure luck, in her opinion, because otherwise she’d have to settle into a motel that was at least a half hour drive from campus. This place is an easy fifteen minute walk from Misthaven, something she’d never thought she’d find. Though, in her first week, she’d found that most of the other tenants were either graduate students who split their time between work and research, or undergrads that had large trust funds. Besides the few drinks she’s shared with Ruby and Graham after work, it’s safe to say she doesn’t exactly have a booming social life here.

Her phone chimes from its place on the couch cushion beside her, breaking her away from her thoughts. She swipes the screen to read the text - if you asked her about it later, she’d adamantly deny the smile that blossomed on her face at seeing his name pop up on the screen.

Keep reading

You know what else? At this point everyone can see that Hook is extremely jealous of Emma and Regina spending so much time together..
‘Why?’ you ask me.
I’ll say why. Because he knows Regina is changing and he can see that, but he still keeps calling her evil. And that makes him even more of a jerk than he already is.
Its like he has the need to call her names to hurt her, just because his ego is hurt and because Emma prefer to spend more time with Regina than with her 'boyfriend’.