and it's not like he doesn't ever say things like that

My experience with the signs in my life
  • Aries female: so stubborn is incredible. A hot head. She knows what she wants and she'll get it. Yells a lot. Cares a lot about her family. Very concerned about her diet. She looks like a cinnamon roll but is a beast inside.
  • Aries male : very intelligent, probably the most intelligent. Can either have a very scientific mind or a very literary mind. Loves to read. LOVES to make puns. Horrible ones. Has the biggest laugh.
  • Taurus female: MY BIGGEST LOVE. Literally the cutest thing. She is so smart and caring and it's true: she loves to eat. Cares so much about everyone, not only her close friends. She almost never get angry but when she does. Ouch.
  • Taurus male: a cutie. Always ready to cheer you up. DOES NOT. BELIEVE. IN. ASTROLOGY. Likes scientific shit. Loves old movies. Always laughs at your jokes. The best friend you can find. Loves Shrek.
  • Gemini female: so strong and independent. Her hair is always on point, so is her outfit. Either very tall or very short. They talk a lot and they love listening to you. Geminis are actually very lovable people. Best companion for a boring class or for lunch break.
  • Gemini male: very bold and confident about himself. Does his own thing. It's not that he is a dick, it's just that he has his own problems to take care of. Except Trump, Trumps is really a dick. Im sorry Geminis that he is in your sign. The cool guy of the class who has a different girl every week. A lil fuckboy but fun to have a chat with. Loves videogames and perfect pal to get drunk with.
  • Cancer female: not a crybaby. Actually HATES to cry in public. More often than you think, very extroverted. Very passionate about what she loves. High ambitions, starts many things and then get bored. So many puns oh god.
  • Cancer male: oh boy. "Nightmare dressed as a daydream". Makes you feel so special. Boyfriend material. Usually dark hair and dark eyes. Not very tall. Adorable. Special laugh. Will do great things in life. Very creative but kinda introvert(?) WILL RATHER DIE THAN CRY IN PUBLIC.
  • Leo female: very close about her private things but she will open up if you demonstrate her she can trust you. Loves everyone. Not that confident about herself. Very confident about the world, tho. Wants to move someplace else and experience. People respect her.
  • Leo male: Stonehead™. Literally smokes all the time to forget about the pain he feels. Hides emotions and then explodes, usually with rage. Either very close to you that he calls you every day, or he'll completely ignore you. Smart even tho it doesn't look like. The lonely wolf.
  • Virgo female: so stubborn and independent. She knows what she wants and she'll get it. Can get very clingy to the people she loves but sometimes neglect other people she loves even tho she doesn't notice. Get mad easily for the little things. The queen. Just listen to her, she knows the shit.
  • Virgo male: cute but doesn't have his own personality. Sometimes gets involved in ugly companies and does things he doesn't want to. Very sensitive but tries to hide it. Actually cares about you even tho he wants to appear a tough boy. Pretends he doesn't care about school, ends up with all A. Probably very good at soccer.
  • Libra female: becomes part of your family if she isn't already. Amazing lipsticks. Always has great stories to tell. Lives in the clouds. Forgets about things easily but won't forget the important things. Has so many passions but get easily distracted when she is studying for an exam. Perfect person to binge watch Sherlock with.
  • Libra male: my everything. Pretends he's a gryffindor but deep down is a slytherin. Stunning. Gets high grade without doing shit. The teacher favorite. The one you can do stupid shit with. Will do anything for you. Listens to you 24/7. Loves tv shows. Very smart. Will probably end up doing something very important. Perfect dad.
  • Scorpio female: actually very sweet and caring, as much as cancer. Never shows off her emotions but you'll know when she cares about you. She's like a mama bear. She'll call you if she feels you are not happy. She'll call you constantly. Extroverted and kind. Best presents ever. Looks naive but very cautious.
  • Scorpio male: ok so my ex fwb was a scorpio and i gotta say they get emotionally attached. Pretend they don't care AT ALL and then calls u at 2 in the morning telling u they love you. Just be careful cause they don't know what they want. Obsessed with electronic things and sex.
  • Sagittarius female: literally on fire. SHE. TALKS. SO. MUCH. I have so many different feelings about her. Either i love completely or I can't stand her. She pretends she knows everything. She's so slow at doing everything, except talking. Laughs a lot. Very sensitive deep down. So loud.
  • Sagittarius male: Pretty introverted. The fire is hidden. He's a freaking badass. If he cares about you, he will show you. Most likely to call you at midnight for your birthday. Very sweet. Goes big or goes home, especially in love. Both a cinnamon and a sinnamon roll. Like if he ain't in the same political party as you, just don't mention politics. That's when the fire shows.
  • Capricorn female: so. she actually cares about you. but she has so much shit going on so she might forget to come at a place you invited her, she won't even apologize but when something happens to you, be sure she'll call. She's absolutely cute and she has been hurt so many times so it's hard for her to trust people completely.
  • Capricorn male: THE FUCKING FANBOY. He loves to travel and to try new things. He is so shy but with his friends he's crazy. Laughs at his own jokes. Extremely sensitive and when he loves, he loves hard. So intelligent and interesting. Absolutely adorable.
  • Aquarius female: the sweetest. she gets clingy to everyone but because she wants to have friends and do things and has a lot of problems but holds everything in and puts her friends first and she's hurt. The most precious human. She needs, she deserves to be loved the most. Learns very quickly and she's very honest.
  • Aquarius male: the devil™. Actually he is funny, like so many jokes, but sometimes it's just too much. He hates when people offend him. Gets on the defensive. Kinda selfish and cares a lot about like 3 people (?). Like he will kill for them. So much drama, boy. Probably failed history and algebra 2 twice.
  • Pisces female: such a badass and a cutiepie at the same time i don't even know how this is possible. she has such a strong personality and loves her friends. Determined and will fight with her teeth for what she loves. You need to have a pisces in your life. She always says she will kill a person but then she just like run away.
  • Pisces male: like just like the pisces female. Cares so much about his family and shows his emotions easily, whether is anger or sadness or happiness. Determined but also insecure about himself, but will do great things.
I'm so much happier ๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿ˜Š now that I'm dead๐Ÿ˜ต๐Ÿ’€. Technically ๐Ÿค”missing๐Ÿ•ต. Soon to be presumed dead๐Ÿ˜ต๐Ÿ’€. Gone๐Ÿ‘‹๐Ÿป. And my lazy ๐Ÿ’ค lying ๐Ÿ˜ˆ shitting ๐Ÿ’ฉ oblivious ๐Ÿ™„husband ๐Ÿ’‘ will go to prison ๐Ÿš“ for my murder ๐Ÿ”ช๐Ÿ”ช๐Ÿ”ช. Nick Dunne took my pride and my dignity and my hope and my money๐Ÿ’ฐ. He took and took from me until I no longer existed. That's murder๐Ÿ”ช๐Ÿ”ช๐Ÿ”ช. Let the punishment fit the crime. To fake a convincing murder ๐Ÿ”ช๐Ÿ”ช๐Ÿ”ช you have to have discipline๐Ÿ’ช. You befriend a local idiot๐Ÿ’. Harvest the details ๐Ÿ‘€๐Ÿ“ of her hundrum life and cram her with stories ๐Ÿ“š about your husband's ๐Ÿ’‘ violent temper ๐Ÿ˜ก๐Ÿ˜ก๐Ÿ˜ก. Secretly create some money ๐Ÿ’ฐ troubles: credit cards ๐Ÿ’ณ, perhaps online gambling๐Ÿ’ป♠๏ธ♣๏ธ♥๏ธ♦๏ธ. With the help of the unwitting๐Ÿ‘ฑ๐Ÿป, bump upโฌ†๏ธโฌ†๏ธ your life insurance๐Ÿ’ต. Purchase getaway car๐Ÿš˜. Craigslist. Generic. Cheap. Pay cash๐Ÿ’ต. You need to package ๐ŸŽ yourself so that people will truly mourn ๐Ÿ˜ญ๐Ÿ˜ญ๐Ÿ˜ญ your loss. And America ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ loves ♥๏ธ pregnant ๐Ÿ‘ถwomen ๐Ÿšบ. As if it's so hard to spread your legs. You know what's hard? Faking a pregnancy ๐Ÿ‘ถ. First, drain your toilet๐Ÿšฝ. Invite pregnant ๐Ÿ‘ถ idiot ๐Ÿ’ into your home ๐Ÿ  and ply her with lemonade ๐Ÿ‹๐Ÿ‹๐Ÿ‹. Steal ๐Ÿค— pregnant ๐Ÿ‘ถ idiot's ๐Ÿ’ urine ๐Ÿšฝ. Voilà! ๐ŸŽ‰ A pregnany is now part of your legal medical record ๐Ÿ—ƒ. Happy Aniversary๐Ÿ’‘๐ŸŽ‰. Wait for your clueless โ” husband ๐Ÿ’‘ to start his day ๐Ÿ“†. Off he goes... ๐Ÿ‘‹๐Ÿป and the clock is ticking โฑ. Meticulously stage ๐ŸŽญ your crime scene ๐Ÿ•ต with just enough mistakes to raise the specter of doubt ๐Ÿค”. You need to bleed ๐Ÿ’‰. A lot๐Ÿ’‰๐Ÿ’‰. A lot, a lot๐Ÿ’‰๐Ÿ’‰๐Ÿ’‰๐Ÿ’‰๐Ÿ’‰. The head wound ๐Ÿค• kind of bleed ๐Ÿ’‰. A crime scene ๐Ÿ•ต kind of bleed ๐Ÿ’‰. You need to clean; poorly๐Ÿ‘Ž, like he ๐Ÿ’‘ would. Clean and bleed ๐Ÿ’‰, bleed ๐Ÿ’‰ and clean. And leave a Little something behind: a fire ๐Ÿ”ฅin July๐Ÿ“†? And because you're you๐Ÿ‘ธ๐Ÿผ, you don't ๐Ÿšซ stop there. You need a diary ๐Ÿ“’. Minimum three hundred 3๏ธโƒฃ0๏ธโƒฃ0๏ธโƒฃ entries ๐Ÿ“ on the Nick and Amy ๐Ÿ’‘ story ๐Ÿ’ญ. Start with the fairy-tale early days: those are true, and they're crucial. You want Nick and Amy to be likable๐Ÿ’–. After that, you invent. The spending๐Ÿ’ธ, the abuse๐Ÿ‘Š๐Ÿป๐Ÿ’ฅ, the fear๐Ÿ˜ฑ, the threat of violence๐Ÿ”ช. And Nick thought he was the writer๐Ÿ“... burn it๐Ÿ”ฅ, just the right amount. Make sure the cops ๐Ÿ‘ฎ will find it ๐Ÿ•ต. Finally, honor tradition with a very special treasure ๐Ÿ’Ž hunt. And if I get everything right โžก๏ธ, the world ๐ŸŒŽ๐ŸŒ๐ŸŒ will hate ๐Ÿ˜ก Nick for killing ๐Ÿ”ช๐Ÿ”ช๐Ÿ”ช his beautiful ๐Ÿ˜‡, pregnant ๐Ÿ‘ถ wife ๐Ÿ’‘. And after all the outrage ๐Ÿ˜ก๐Ÿ˜ก๐Ÿ˜ก, when I'm ready, I'll go out on the water ๐ŸŒŠ with a handful โœ‹๐Ÿป of pills ๐Ÿ’Š๐Ÿ’Š๐Ÿ’Š and a pocket full of stones. And when they find my body ๐Ÿ’†๐Ÿผ, they'll know: Nick Dunne ๐Ÿ‘ฑ๐Ÿป dumped his beloved ๐Ÿ’‘ like garbage ๐Ÿšฎ, and she floated past all the other abused, unwanted, inconvenient women ๐Ÿšบ๐Ÿšบ๐Ÿšบ. Then Nick ๐Ÿ‘ฑ๐Ÿป will die ๐Ÿ˜ต๐Ÿ’€ too. Nick ๐Ÿ‘ฑ๐Ÿป and Amy ๐Ÿ‘ธ๐Ÿผ will be gone ๐Ÿ‘‹๐Ÿป, but then we never really existed. Nick ๐Ÿ‘ฑ๐Ÿป loved a girl ๐Ÿšบ I was pretending to be. "Cool ๐Ÿ˜Ž girl ๐Ÿšบ". Men ๐Ÿšน always use that, don't they? As their defining compliment: "She's a cool ๐Ÿ˜Ž girl ๐Ÿšบ". Cool ๐Ÿ˜Ž girl ๐Ÿšบ is hot ๐Ÿ”ฅ. Cool ๐Ÿ˜Ž girl ๐Ÿšบ is game ๐ŸŽฒ๐ŸŽฎ. Cool ๐Ÿ˜Ž girl ๐Ÿšบ is fun ๐ŸŽ‰. Cool ๐Ÿ˜Ž girl ๐Ÿšบ never ๐Ÿšซ๐Ÿšซ๐Ÿšซ gets angry ๐Ÿ˜ก at her man ๐Ÿšน. She only smiles โ˜บ๏ธ in a chagrined, loving ๐Ÿ’• manner. And then presents her mouth ๐Ÿ‘„ for fucking ๐Ÿ‘‰๐Ÿ‘Œ. She likes ๐Ÿ‘ what he likes ๐Ÿ‘, so evidently he's a vinyl hipster ๐Ÿ‘จ๐Ÿ‘“ who loves โค๏ธ fetish Manga ๐Ÿ“š. If he likes girls gone wild ๐Ÿ‘™, she's a mall ๐Ÿ› babe who talks football ๐Ÿˆ and endures buffalo wings ๐Ÿ— at Hooters ๐Ÿˆ๐Ÿˆ. When I met Nick Dunne ๐Ÿ‘ฑ๐Ÿป I knew he wanted "Cool ๐Ÿ˜Ž girl ๐Ÿšบ". And for him, I'll admit: I was willing to try. I wax๐Ÿ•ฏ-stripped my pussy ๐Ÿ˜ฝ raw. I drank canned beer ๐Ÿบ watching Adam Sandler ๐Ÿ’ฉ movies ๐Ÿ“ผ. I ate cold โ„๏ธ pizza ๐Ÿ• and remained a size ๐Ÿ‘— two 2๏ธโƒฃ. I blew him ๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ‘„, semi-regularly. I lived in the moment. I was fucking game ๐ŸŽฒ๐ŸŽฎ. I can't say I didn't enjoy some of it. Nick ๐Ÿ‘ฑ๐Ÿป teased out in me things I didn't know existed. A lightness โ˜€๏ธ, a humor๐Ÿ˜‚, an ease. But I made him smarter ๐Ÿค“. Sharper. I inspired him to rise โฌ†๏ธ to my level. I forged the man ๐Ÿšน of my dreams ๐Ÿ’ญ. We were happy ๐Ÿ˜Š pretending to be other people. We were the happiest ๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿ˜Š couple ๐Ÿ‘ซ we knew. And what's the point of being together if you're not ๐Ÿšซ๐Ÿšซ๐Ÿšซ the happiest ๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿ˜Š? But Nick ๐Ÿ‘ฑ๐Ÿป got lazy ๐Ÿ’ค. He became someone I did not ๐Ÿšซ๐Ÿšซ๐Ÿšซ agree to marry ๐Ÿ‘ฐ๐Ÿผ. He actually expected me to love โค๏ธ him unconditionally. Then he dragged me, penniless ๐Ÿ’ต๐Ÿšซ, to the navel of this great country ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ and found himself a newer, younger ๐Ÿ‘ง๐Ÿผ, bouncier cool ๐Ÿ˜Ž girl ๐Ÿšบ. You think I'd let him destroy ๐Ÿ‘Ž๐Ÿ‘Ž๐Ÿ‘Ž me and end up happier ๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿ˜Š than ever? No ๐Ÿšซ๐Ÿšซ๐Ÿšซ๐Ÿšซfucking way. He doesn't โŒ get to win ๐Ÿ†. My cute โ˜บ๏ธ, charming ๐Ÿ˜‰, salt-of-the-earth Missouri guy. He needed to learn ๐Ÿ“๐Ÿ“š. Grown-ups ๐Ÿ‘ฑ๐Ÿ‘ด work ๐Ÿ’ช for things. Grown-ups ๐Ÿ‘ฑ๐Ÿ‘ด pay ๐Ÿ’ต๐Ÿ’ต๐Ÿ’ต. Grown-ups ๐Ÿ‘ฑ๐Ÿ‘ด suffer consequences ๐Ÿ˜–.
Kpop groups and their fandoms
  • <p> <b>Super Junior:</b> most ELFs have grown up with these legends, staying by their side through every obstacle and being their strength during the hardest times. While ELFs really miss having comebacks as a whole group, they know that it's enough just watching them succeed in solo projects and supporting the members who are doing/about to finish their military service.<p/><b>BigBang:</b> we truly do get treated like VIPs when it comes to these 5 weirdos who changed the kpop game ever since debuting. There's not a single concert or special video where they don't show their appreciations for VIPs, whether new or old. We love them when they're doing solos, and we love them even more when they're together.<p/><b>SHINee:</b> Shawols treat shinee like kings, just as they should be treated. We practically worship the ground they walk on, and all of us are guilty of baby-ing the maknae, don't lie. They've been through some difficult times, but shawols are always there for shinee to lean on, and they're always thankful for all the support and it always shows when they're together.<p/><b>Infinite:</b> Inspirit and Infinite go hand in hand, always. Woohyun is always assuring inspirits that no one else could steal his heart, and no matter how cringy he is, it's true. They're always giving us new things to fangirl and roll our eyes about, whether they've had a comeback or not.<p/><b>EXO:</b> "Exo-L, we are one." I've never seen a group that spoils their fans more than they do, not to mention always exposing each mf comeback to us. We have a self-proclaimed dad in the fandom and everything, constantly showing his love to exo-l's. True fans have been with them and supporting them since whenever, and will stick by their side till whenever.<p/><b>BTOB:</b> Melodies will always be one of the sweetest fandoms, esp when having to put up with how underrated our boys are. Stanning the craziest and most extra group in kpop isn't easy, but melodies got that down, and it doesn't seem right if at least 2 members aren't screaming in every interview.<p/><b>VIXX:</b> they're always reminding Starlights that they'd be nowhere without them, and that we inspire them everyday as well. Seeing them acting charitable and friendly only rubs off on us, and it's safe to say that we're probably the chillest and most accepting fandom. Starlights act like VIXX's bodyguards bc we'd never make them uncomfortable, and they're always thankful for that.<p/><b>B.A.P:</b> Babyz have been with them through thick and thin, and it's so heartwarming seeing the support after the group has been through so much bs. They treat babyz with so much love and respect, esp when they have so many fans around the world. We're constantly spoiled with social media updates, and it's so nice seeing the six of them working together again.<p/><b>Topp Dogg:</b> if it were any other group, fans wouldn't keep streaming and supporting topp dogg as much as topp klass does. We struggle with these boys everyday bc of the lack of exposure and attention that they deserve to get, but they never fail to remind us of their love no matter what- bc they know they'll always have topp klass.<p/><b>Got7:</b> iGot7, or Ahgase's, are probably the funniest fandom to ever exist. It's like we're besties with Got7, and there's always someone roasting the other, whether it's us or them. We're blessed to have them be so active on social media, and we're their personal hype men. A lot of us don't support them blindly, though, and we're always the first to call them out on their mistakes.<p/><b>Monsta X:</b> kings of fan service, never ever disappointing Monbebes. They make us feel so special when it's like we're in a relationship with them, but they're aware of how cheesy they are when they flirt with monbebes. Might be the meme-iest group alive, but we're also the meme-iest fandom ever so win-win.<p/><b>iKon:</b> yet another kpop group that's terribly underrated, but iKonics make up for all of that with all the love they show to these kids. They're always out to expose each other and we love them for it. They outdo themselves after each comeback, and they care so much about pleasing iKonics.<p/><b>Day6:</b> only My Day can appreciate how special and unique these boys are, and we always remind them of it. We go crazy over all their teasers and trying to figure out how all their music videos are connected, and tbh they love watching us suffer. Each member is so relatable that we can't help but bias all of them, and they're highly aware of that fact.<p/></p>
Voltron Swears

·        Pidge and Keith probably have the biggest potty mouths

Like Pidge has very colourful language, and uses a variety of curses at random

It freaks out the rest of the team because she’s so small, and the language she uses can be so vulgare at times

Lance and Hunk laugh whenever she swears around the team; Shiro is appalled.

  Like how could one so smol and innocent be able to curse like a sailor!

·    Keith doesn’t really care either way   His own foul language is mostly composed of the word ‘fuck’, which he uses frequently in different tones depending on the situation

Like when his lion gets hit, or he loses a round in training, it’s a short and angry ‘Fuck’

When he’s pissed off at someone it’s a loud burst ‘FUCK off!’ or ‘Fuck you!’ that makes the rest team jump in alarm

When he’s annoyed it’s a drawn out ‘fuuuckk’

And when it’s Lance nuzzling at his neck it’s a soft, mumbled ‘fuck’

He also flips people/aliens off a lot, and will often end a conversation by holding up two middle fingers and walking backwards out of a room

·        Shiro doesn’t really swear, out loud anyways.

He curses a lot in his head though, but has a really good poker face, so no one ever knows what he’s thinking

Besides “patience yields focus”

He almost lost it a few times with Slav though

·        Hunk tends to swear only when he’s in really stressful situations, but they aren’t actual swears

They’re more like utterances of ‘darn’ and ‘crap’

It’s hilarious and Lance will nearly piss himself laughing whenever he “curses”

Hunk once dropped a plate of space goo and muttered ‘oh for craps sake’ and Shiro, absolutely straight faced, said “Language Hunk.”

Everyone went silent, and Hunk looked ready to die of embarrassment not knowing if Shiro was being serious or not

But then Keith, of all people, began to chuckle, and the gig was up

Now whenever Hunk curses they all go “Language Hunk,” and Shiro mumbles something about a ‘swear jar’

·        Lance also tends not to swear, seeing as he came from a large family with smaller children

He tends to use playful expressions like ‘what the cheese’ and things like that

There are times, however, when he’ll switch to Spanish, which is like, level two anger for Lance

He can string long Spanish curses together and go on a rant whenever he feels the need, and it’s entertaining to watch, seeing as he’s very expressive with his hands, but also a bit intimidating, since none of them know what he’s saying

Sometimes he’ll just spout a bunch of random words to make his rant a little more impressive

He’ll also murmur Spanish curses whenever he and Keith go at it, which Keith loves, since it means Lance is in an entirely different world of pleasure

Level three swears for Lance are scary.

Like, he is pissed off.

When Lance uses actual swear words you know you done fucked up

·        Allura and Coran swear as well, but in Altean, so the others don’t really know what they’re saying (like with Lance)

Coran uses his curses efficiently, sticking them into conversation wherever he feels they’re needed

Allura, on the other hand, is much like Pidge, and has an impressive vocabulary when it comes to curse words

Coran is used to it for the most part, but there are times when she gets really mad and he has to remind himself that, yes, she is a princess, and not some ruffian raised in a bar

The others pick up certain words as well, and use them randomly, which is all very comical, until Lance accidently called an important diplomat a word he heard Allura use once, and said diplomat happened to know the Altean language.

Needless to say Allura had to do some extensive ass-kissing to make up for that one

Coran decided to teach tell them what the words meant after that, and the team had never seen Lance go so red

Keith still makes fun of him for it

Harry's interview on Quotidien
  • I: Can you hear me?
  • H: Yes
  • I: Welcome to Paris!
  • H: Thank you
  • I: How are you? Can you answer in French?
  • H: Good! A little bit. A tiny bit. Très bien et toi ?(very good and you?)
  • I: Very good, thank you. We start our interviews with “can you give us your five favourites words in English or French. Or a French sentence”. Someone told me you knew a French sentence.
  • H: Comment vous faites un café si délicieux? (How do you make such a delicious coffee?)
  • I: OK, that’s good.
  • H: That’s all I have.
  • I: Do you say it very often?
  • H: No... Yes
  • I: What does France mean to you? Is it something, someone etc...?
  • H: Best people I’ve known... I think her, *shows a fan* I guess. Fabien Barthez.
  • I: Yes, Fabien Barthez. Harry, you’re 23 years old and you’re one of the best known pop-star in the world. Everybody has expectations with your new album and single Sign Of The Times. Why did you choose that song? This is not what people were expecting.
  • H: I think I wanted to.. I've always liked music that made me feel something. You know I think writing it I could feet something I wanted to bring it out. I think it's a good indicator for me of what the album is to me. That's why I wanted to go with that first.
  • I: Billboard wrote that the single was "one of the more ambitious opening statements in pop this decade". Not bad, isn't it?
  • H: Thanks!
  • I: Do you have friends working at Billboard?
  • H: I don't know anyone at Billboard.
  • I: When we listen to the song we think of David Bowie, Queen, who else did you think of?
  • H: I mean, I think everyone, anything, any song you've ever listened to growing up or throughout your life or you've enjoyed, inspired you. There are a lot of different things. I wanted to just write and see what came out. I didn't know what I sounded like to make an album. So this process was as interesting for me as I think it will be for people listening to the album for the first time.
  • I: Do you know French singers other than Serge Gainsbourg? That's a tricky question.
  • H: I know Woodkid. He directed my music video.
  • I: Why him?
  • H: I think his videos are amazing, he's a really talented guy and I love French people so I worked with him.
  • I: When you're in Spain, do you say that you love Spanish people?
  • H: No!
  • I: It seems like everything has been easy...
  • H: Great tie.
  • I: You think so? It's French.
  • H: It's not a Spanish tie, isn't it?
  • I: Can I see your loafer? Oh yes! What is the brand? That's not French, isn't it? It's Italian.
  • H: No.
  • I: That's from the European Union!
  • H: Probably yeah.
  • I: It seems like everything has been easy for you, is it true?
  • H: Was what simple?
  • I: Your life, everybody wants a life like yours, with One Direction...
  • H: I mean, I feel very lucky to be able to make music, I feel very lucky to be able to make this, I feel very lucky today being in France and performing my song. I love this song. I can't complain.
  • I: What were the unpleasant things?
  • H: *thinking*
  • I: I don't know, say only one thing.
  • H: I think when you care so much about something, it's hard to get to the point where you feel like it's finished and it feels like you're adding and it never ends and it adds up. So I think the hardest part was getting into that point and be like "ok that's finished."
  • I: You said to the Rolling Stone magazine that most of the album was inspired by a woman. Really?
  • H: No I think, honestly, the album is much more about me than it is about anyone else. I think if I said the album is about a woman it kind of feels like, I don't know, I put a lot of work into this. I don't feel like it revolves around woman. It's a lot about me and things I've never said before. It's more about me.
  • I: How did you start with a boy band and end with a solo career? Is it complicated?
  • H: It's been a lot of fun. You know we were very lucky to get to do some amazing things and at the moment in our lives, we're in a time where everyone is trying their own thing and have a good time. It's been amazing to see everyone doing their own thing as well. If I can do as well as the others, it'd be amazing.
  • I: Do you call them everyday or text them? Do you use What's app?
  • H: I don't have that.
  • I: Why?
  • H: Yes we talk, absolutely. And everyone is bringing stuff out. It's been a lot going on. It's been a good time.
  • I: This is the album cover! Can you describe it? Why did you choose this picture?
  • H: Yeah. So, I don't know. I worked with photographer Harley Weir, I'm a massive fan of her work. And that's amazing and I was lucky enough to work with her. I felt like this was what I wanted.
  • I: Why is it pink? Why the water? Why your back? Why? It's beautiful but why is it pink?
  • H: I don't know, man!
  • I: Really? You don't know?
  • H: I don't know. I don't think I want...
  • I: Apparently pink is Rock'n'roll's colour.
  • H: Apparently so. I don't know. I think it means something to me and if it means anything to anyone else, I wouldn't want to take away from that by explaining it. I think the cool thing about stuff like photos and art is you can just leave it. You don't have to explain it.
  • I: Everybody sees what they want to see.
  • H: Yes exactly.
  • I: Have you seen this?
  • *video of people reacting to Harry's single*
  • I: Your fans record themselves while listening to the song for the first time. You can hear relevant analysis and apparently they all really liked it. Do you read what people say about you on social media? On Youtube, Twitter, Instagram? Do you use Instagram?
  • H: Yes I use it a little bit.
  • *The public disagrees with Harry*
  • H: Yes I use it a little bit. I mean I wish everyone was having as good time as the girl who was like that with her hands. That's what I do when I listen to the song.
  • I: Are you the one using your Instagram? Do you use your own fingers or someone else does it for you?
  • H: Yes, I do mine.
  • I: Do you still vote in Redditch?
  • H: In?
  • I: Redditch!
  • H: That's where I was born?
  • I: Yes.
  • H: I don't live in Redditch.
  • I: So you don't vote there. Where did you vote?
  • H: London, yeah.
  • I: What do you think of the Brexit? Welcome to Europe!
  • H: Thank you very much, thanks. I mean, I don't really comment on politics. To me, anything that brings people together is better than things that pull people apart. That's ... yeah.
  • I: Yet, you are in favour of equality of rights, men, women, gay people, straight people... That's politics.
  • H: I don't know. It doesn't feel like politics. I think stuff like equality feels much more fundamental. I feel like everyone is equal. That doesn't feel like politics to me.
  • I: Your fans are fetishists. They know all of your tattoos, piece of jewellery, they have heart attacks when you cut your hair. Right now you're playing with their feelings. Do you know that?
  • H: Oh ok.
  • I: Yes! What is your favourite tattoo?
  • H: I think... I have a.. probably. I don't know, actually.
  • I: Which one is the latest?
  • H: The latest is this one there. *shows Arlo* And this one. *shows Jackson*
  • I: Jackson? All of them?
  • H: Yes.
  • I: What's the story behind your haircut? How much did you spend on hair products with One Direction?
  • H: Yeah, like a lot. I used a lot, yeah.
  • I: You're in Dunkirk, Christopher Nolan's new movie.
  • H: Yes.
  • I: How did you do?
  • H: I auditioned.
  • I: Look at you there.
  • H: I am, that's me.
  • I: Yes.
  • H: I auditioned and it was great. It's going to be a really cool movie.
  • I: Harry, it feels like we know you since you're a baby. The whole world discovered you in 2010 on X Factor.
  • *video of Harry's X Factor audition*
  • I: You auditioned alone but Simon Cowell had an idea... he put you in a band with Zayn, Louis, Liam and Niall. You became One Direction. You found the name One Direction and you sold millions of albums. One Direction are soon considered as the new Beattles and you filled the biggest stadiums. The whole world was talking about you. When you go out we prayed for your eardrums. You became UK's pride. David Cameron is in one of your music videos, your sang for the Queen. But in 2015... bang! Zayn left the band, fans couldn't get over it. But don't worry, their favourite is now on the cover of the Rolling Stone magazine, he's in Christopher Nolan's new movie, he's Mick Jagger on SNL... What you don't know is that we've met in 2012. You were in France to promote an album and now I have questions. First one! When you're in a car and fans are all around you, do you see that?
  • *video of fans around a car*
  • H: I think I've actually lost my shoe there. When I got in the car... I got in the car and I was like "how many shoes do I have?" Yes I lost my shoe.
  • I: I have another question! Do you still do that before going on stage?
  • *video of Harry and Lou*
  • I: Can we do it?
  • H: No.
  • *does it anyway*
  • I: What is the weirdest question someone asked you?
  • H: I think it was actually a French interview. I got asked if I would pee in a sink... Yeah.
  • I: Ok, that's weird!
  • H: It was the first question, the first question.
  • I: It puts you in the mood.
  • H: Yeah.
  • I: What is the question you never want to be asked ever again? Did I asked you that question?
  • *Harry asks the public*
  • H: Which one? Oh crush.
  • I: What?
  • H: Crush.
  • I: Oh ok. I didn't ask it! Did you know that a French author wrote a novel about you. It's called "Styles", it's about his obsession with you. It's in French. You can translate it.
  • H: Oh! Is that true?
  • I: Yes it's true. He dedicated to you. It's called "Styles" and it's a really good book. Read it!
  • H: Thank you.
  • I: Thank you very much Harry Styles for coming tonight. His first eponymous album comes out on the 12th May. Thank you Harry Styles.
  • H: Thank you.
  • I: Have a safe journey home.

When I say Vol- you say?!

breaking the cycle: gotg2 and the theme of toxic masculinity

Itโ€™s taken me, oh, about a month to organize my thoughts on this and theyโ€™re still a mess, but I have all these snippets in my head about how GOTG2 deconstructs toxic masculinity, and hey! youโ€™re gonna get them now

Toxic masculinity is basically the concept that socializing men and boys to be a certain โ€˜masculineโ€™ way, and criticizing them or ridiculing them when they fail to live up to these (often impossible or even abusive) standards, is ultimately harmful to everyone, men and women alike. Ever wonder why you flinch at dudes yelling โ€œman up!โ€ to their crying young sons instead of comforting them? Yeah, thatโ€™s why.

Anyway, regarding GOTG: a lot of this stuff revolves around Yondu and the Yondu-Peter relationship, but also (I totally love this) a large portion of it also revolves around a white, straight, able-bodied man who is quite literally called โ€˜Egoโ€™. spoilers follow, naturally-

Keep reading

the signs as people from my university
  • Aries: That girl who loves partying and socializing with people, she's a fangirl of so many buffed-up singers and she's so pretty. She's kinda judgmental and she's homophobic but she follows so many gay people and likes their posts and nobody in my generation really understands why. She can be really impulsive sometimes and she hates classes but she's a good friend and a funny person
  • Taurus: That girl who is always late, she has social anxiety and she's silent af. Grades are not her forte'. She tries to socialize very hard and everyone is annoyed by the fact that she tries to discuss things that she really doesn't know shit about. She is afraid of some professors, she is christian af and she is kinda lost, but she's a good girl who believes in the supernatural and she always invites us to coffee at her place
  • Gemini: The girl who loves spending time with people, she always loves to discuss about every topic, she knows so much about many things, she's doing great with her grades and she's among the top 5 students in the entire generation. Also, she has PERFECT, sonorous American accent and everybody loves it. She always initiates coffee gatherings but nobody really comes because she's not that much of a leader and her voice is so soft so nobody could really hear when she's talking. She's also a passionate gamer AND in the same time she finds time to maintain her grades and social life
  • Cancer: That (jock) guy who's the tallest one, he's blonde, buffed-up and he's the definition of a straight white boy. He's childish as fuck and he can become very boring sometimes. Once, my colleagues have shooed him out of the cafeteria because he was bothering them. He also tells so many stupid dad-jokes and laughs at his own jokes, flirts with some professors, has been single since forever (not that he's ugly - he's average looking but he's so much boring sometimes because he doesn't have any real friends and he gets excited about people so he doesn't know WHEN to stop). He literally flirts with every single female human being that he can find and he pushes them all away because he's pushy af. He's also introverted and doesn't really know his way with girls
  • Leo: That girl who's one of the top students in the generation. She's always smiling, she has the best grades, she always tries to present this "perfect" image of herself. She is very intelligent and she loves reading, she gets drunk like every second day but that doesn't stop her from maintaining her perfect grades. She's very successful and she's a good leader, she knows all the fresh gossip and she always sits in the first row with her best university friend. In fact, she and her best uni friend are hated by everyone because they're just so successful and everyone's jealous of them. She also secretly hates everybody and gossips with her best uni friend. She and her friend have tons of screenshots ready to blackmail people if anyone says anything against them lmao. But everyone (every zodiac sign) in this generation pretends we like each other so...
  • Virgo: That professor who's VERY detail-oriented and she's a big perfectionist but she can't fix her awful handwriting. She's very successful and she has TONS of potential, she literally KNOWS EVERYTHING about her subjects but sometimes she can really drain us physically and emotionally. She gives us tons of assignments and homework and she always gives us lectures on the most difficult courses. Jfc she behaves like we study in Cambridge / Oxford. But don't get me wrong, she's NOT a bad person. She's actually a VERY good person and at the end of each semester she buys us coffee and tea, she talks with us about our experience with the course and she just wants us to learn some things that we should learn, that's why we perceive her as "difficult" and "problematic"
  • Libra: That girl who loves hugging, has great communication skills and is a social justice warrior. She thinks that she's everyone's friend and she always tries to criticize everyone's opinion, thinking that she'll seem and sound more intelligent. She also listens to rock and metal, she loves children and she smokes a lot, she's very sensitive and she's very friendly. Once, on the Facebook group of the university, she tried to accuse Pisces of something he didn't do and he literally ruined her in front of all those people, that was one of her biggest mistakes she's ever done in uni because she didn't know that that guy can be pretty evil when someone tries to insult/hurt him. The next day in uni she was on the verge of a mental breakdown because that guy really hurt her with his words, making her look stupid and pretentious, and everybody stopped talking to that guy for like, a month or two
  • Scorpio: That girl who's late in class 90% of the time, and those 10% she's not present in class. She is very quiet and she doesn't show particular interest in anything. She doesn't have a taste in fashion and style, unlike most Scorpios that I know. She just wants to go home all the time and nobody knows what she's doing in her life, she's so mysterious and she's not a good teamworker because she doesn't really care about her grades
  • Sagittarius: That girl who can't stop talking and she's always arguing with someone but we all love her. She's very communicative but she's insecure at the same time. She has tons of likes on Facebook and Instagram. She's a VERY open-minded girl, she hates racism, homophobes, nazi scum and racists. She's a really good friend with Leo and Pisces but Capricorn is her bff and her roommate. She has an excellent taste in fashion, style and music and she has S_L_A_Y_I_N_G eyebrows. I think that she's bi/lesbian but maybe she's closeted. She always hugs Capricorn and gets beaten by Capricorn because Capricorn can't stand people touching her
  • Capricorn: That girl who loves vintage notebooks, loves taking studyblr photos and uploads them on tubmlr and Instagram, she loves journeys and we haven't heard her talking for THREE GODDAMN YEARS. She is very antisocial and introverted but she has excellent taste for art, film, music and she's like 24/7 on her phone because it's obvious that she can't stand most of us but she's always sweet and supportive when someone approaches her. Sometimes she doesn't want to talk and she just smiles as a response. She's Sagittarius' best friend and roommate and they've became really close friends. She also loves journeys and she's a daydreamer but she's very intelligent. Her grades are not that good, she's not an attention whore and she tries to be "invisible" but she simply can't
  • Aquarius: That guy with his cockney accent who has insane memory and loves football. He's actually a loner, he's a bit creepy and weird, le loves britpop and indie nd he was one of the best students in the first two years of uni but his grades dropped. He's like, very secretive and he can be pretty arrogant and you just can't sit next to him because he's telling jokes all the time which takes your attention away. He is a loner and once he publicly told us that he used to have cyber sex with his girlfriend because she lived in another country and they've never met in real life (I mean, who tells such things omg Aqua get your shit together). He tries to insult people and he tries to be sarcastic but he can only be sarcastic with the stupid ones. He also thinks that he's a know-it-all and that he's the most intelligent person in the world. He can be really judgmental sometimes and he pushes people away with that
  • Pisces: That guy who always sits in the first row with his best university friend and is one of the top students in the generation. He's also a model, nerd, gamer, works out and whatnot. He is sweet to everyone and talks to everyone but he can be very sassy at times. He was the one who had a verbal fight with Libra because Libra triggered him and he destroyed her verbally. He's really skinny and dreamy and he has a very deep voice and an excellent taste in fashion and style. His style is kinda dark and he's so aesthetic. He listens to some music that no other people in the world listen to but he also listens to some mainstream music. In fact, he listens to whatever he wants and he doesn't really think about what other people think about him. He tends to roll his eyes a lot and he cares about his physical beauty more than he cares about his love life. He's too egotistic and self-centered and he's extremely picky, which makes him single most of the time.

anonymous asked:

Okay, so here I am, an innocent lurker, having just found this blog, when I see: "what if the skywalkers were cthulu-type monsters." excuse me??? please elaborate you just wrote that and nothing else im dying ex p la i n y o ur s el f

  • The Force is everything that ever was and ever will be, every storm and every silence, the hunting krayk dragon and cowering bantha calf: it is huge, all-consuming, completely inhuman. How, then, could its children be anything short of monstrous? (Wonders, yes. But monsters all the same.)
  • Anakin Skywalker is boy-shaped, but Obi Wan cannot bear to look at him. 
  • A clarification: he can look at him with his human eyes; but he must clamp down the extra eyes his Force-sensitivity gives him, because when he doesn’t – well. The first time he met the boy he hadn’t closed those eyes; he’d open them, wide and curious and seen –
    • teeth and claws and roiling shadows, a slipslide of features and starfire, the white blur of warpspeed and it hurts –
  • Anakin Skywalker is the son of the Force, half human and half something extraordinary. There’s a reason the Jedi don’t like him, why Yoda mistrusts him; they all have to close their extra eyes around him; and even when they’re white-knuckled with effort, clamping down so the Force can’t so much as whisper to them (and that hurts Jedi, of course it does, it runs counter to all their training about opening up and trusting in the Force) and even then they still feel the velvet quiver of unseen limbs over their skin. 
  • And more. And worse. When he is angry – which is often – his shadow warps into something awful, and even the least Force-sensitive being quails at the profound wrongness of the sight. His features warp and melt, teeth spiralling out from his pupils, his mouth cracks open wide, his tongue growing scales and feathers and catching fire and he smiles, oh how he smiles and –
    • nothing like him should exist and
    • and you blink, lose the moment, he’s just a young man glowering at you, and his shadow is the same, but the memory of that horror is seared into the back of your brain.
  • It is no surprise that Padme dies in childbed. 
  • The first child’s cry makes Obi Wan’s bones rattle. It – you could not call it anything but an it – is a twisting, squirming mess of light and dark. There’s a wing, a thorned branch: you cannot focus on it. You cannot pin a shape to it. Obi Wan wants to run away, run and never look back. But the Med Droid is offering it to him; and it is a child, of a sort; and Obi Wan takes it, and it coalesces into a soft pink baby girl. He places it – her – against Padme’s white breast. Padme cradles it. “She’s beautiful.”
  • The second is just the same: pushed out like any human baby, but a roling mess of lightening and thick syrupy cloud, one moment tentacled and the next furred, pure power condensed. Obi Wan takes it in his arms and it solidifies into another fat baby, small and squalling. 
  • He’s not like the other babies, Luke Skywalker. He’s a funny one. When he smiles, you have the sudden absurd impulse that he’s got too many teeth for his face. His hair is corn-gold, but when you see it out of the corner of your eye you swear that it isn’t hair at all, but fire and teeth. Looking at him too long is like staring into the sun. 
  • The other children are scared of him, Behu says to Owen, once. And Owen says: children always know. And Behu says: he isn’t a bad kid. Owen says: he’s a wonder. And that’s the problem. 
  • Jabba’s goons go to the Lars farm to collect water once. Only once. They return to Jabba’s palace gibbering nonsense, with their eyes burned out. Both mumble something about there’s something wrong with the boy and then jump into the ragnar pit. 
  • Don’t do that again, says Owen, but he hugs his nephew all the same, pulls him close, kisses his temple. He feels something hot-cold run over his spine, like something far larger than the child is trying to embrace him back. That night, Behu runs her fingers over the new white scartissue on her husband’s back, and says, he’s a good kid. Owen says, I know.
  • If I was there I could have saved them, Luke says to Ben Kenobi, years later, and in that moment he has a thousand thousand eyes and all of them are burning, and he has no limbs but a dozen wings bearing him aloft, and each feather is molten gold and each feather drips blood. Ben thinks of Anakin, screws his Force-sensitivity closed. Luke is a monster. A wonder. But first and foremost he is a boy, and he is grieving. 
    • Ben Kenobi holds him while he weeps. 
  • When Leia comes, she turns into a celestial horror with more teeth than Han cares to count. “Huh,” he says, after their first time. She’s so little in his arms, but so vast. He feels something gentle his back. He says, “Next time, I’ll wear a blindfold, princess. Don’t want to blind me, do you? Then I won’t be able to see when you’re doing stupid shit.” She titters, presses her face into the curve of his neck. 
    • Love comes to everyone, including monsters. 
Rumor
  • Minho: There's a rumor going around, you know.
  • You: What rumor?
  • Minho: Apparently there's this guy who really likes you but doesnt have the guts to tell you.
  • You: Who is it?
  • Minho: He'd kill me if I told you.
  • You: I thought we were best friends.
  • Minho: He's also one of my best friends.
  • You: Minho, you're only other best friends are Thomas, and Newt and it's definitely not one of them.
  • -
  • Thomas: Hey (Y/N), I heard about the guy who's in love with you.
  • You: Oh, so he's in love with me?
  • Newt: No he isnt.
  • You: Can't you shanks just admit that there is no guy. If there were, you'd at the least give me a name.
  • Thomas: Mm, no names. But you know him. *winks*
  • (walk away)
  • You: I know everyone in the bloody glade.
  • -
  • Minho: Do you want to know more about your secret admirer?
  • You: Not really.
  • Minho: And why not?
  • You: Because you shanks are playing with me.
  • -
  • Newt: You alright?
  • You: *laughs* Just doing my best to stay away from the boys and their secret admirer crap.
  • Newt: Don't think you have one?
  • You: Have you met the boys? Of course not. Besides if there were, I dont understand why he wouldn't talk to me.
  • Newt: Maybe he's afraid you won't like him back.
  • You: How will he ever know if he wont talk to me?
  • Newt: Give the shank a break, he's a shy one.
  • You: So you know him?
  • Newt: *under his breath* Better than you'd think.
  • -
  • You: The hints you gave me about the guy.. Are they true?
  • Minho: Yeah he's a shy dude, one of my best friends and won't shut up about you when you're not around.
  • You: I think I have a clue about who it is.
  • Minho: It's not all that hard to tell if your pay attention to the way he looks at you.
  • You: What if it's the guy I'm thinking of?
  • Minho: I think you know exactly who he is, (Y/N).
  • -
  • You: Guess what? I found out who the secret admirer is.
  • Newt: Oh..how?
  • You: Doesn't matter. Do you think now I know he'll grow a pair and ask me out?
  • Newt: If he does, will you say yes?
  • You: Only if he stops referring to himself in the third person.
  • Newt: Okay (Y/N), would you like to go out with me?
  • You: Y'know I always had a thing for boys with accents.

anonymous asked:

Hey it's the Disney anon! Yeah I meant sort of live action BATB cause I love the Bucky fic you did๐Ÿ˜Š So if it's something you'd be happy to write for can I request a reader x gaston fic where they grew up together and she is in love with him but is convinced it isn't mutual & that he deserves better so doesn't tell him. Another guy asks her out & she accepts cause she thinks she should move on if gaston will never love her. But Gaston actually gets super jealous/possessive. Hope it's ok thanksโค

Pairing: Gaston x Reader
Fandom: Disney ; Beauty and the Beast (2017)
Warnings: /

A/N: asdfghjkl, Iโ€™m so glad you send me this request, I literally grinned so hard when I got it! I donโ€™t normally post two things a day, but I literally had the easiest time writing this. This prompt gave me so much inspiration that I just typed it in one go and Iโ€™m actually quite happy with how it turned out. I hope you like it as well and if you have any other gaston x reader request please send them my way. I LOVE writing for him and the reader. (added Gaston to my fandoms list)

ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย *****

โ€œYouโ€™re staring again,โ€ LeFou, who had seemingly snuck up on you, whispered.

You blinked a few times to break the spell you were under before and turned around, wanting to convince him that, no, you werenโ€™t staring at Gaston like a fool in love.ย 

But the look he threw you was enough to know that it wouldnโ€™t work on him.

โ€œItโ€™s not like I donโ€™t understand. And Iโ€™m certainly not the one to judge you,โ€ he winked at you and you had to laugh a little. โ€œBut what I donโ€™t understand is why you donโ€™t tell him. Youโ€™ve known each other for so long..โ€

โ€œOh LeFou. If only it were so easy. Look at him..-โ€ he was currently chasing Belle again. โ€œHe doesnโ€™t feel the same and I doubt he ever will. He needs a woman who cooks for him and plays the good wife. You and me both know that Iโ€™m not that kind of woman.โ€

โ€œNeither is Belle! Which is why he fancies her! So what makes you different?โ€

โ€œIโ€™m a huntress, LeFou. Belle and me are completely the opposite of each other. If sheโ€™s his type then Iโ€™m most certainly not.โ€

โ€œSheโ€™s beautiful. Thatโ€™s why sheโ€™s his type. And do I need to remind you of your beauty?โ€

You sighed and turned around to face your friend, smiling a little, then hugging him.

In the meantime, Gaston gave up for today in chasing Belle and approached the two of you.

Keep reading

  • Me: *sigh*
  • Cashier: What's wrong?
  • Me: It's the scent of this place. It's nostalgic. Reminds me of lavender scent of my grandmother's house. Even color of the walls remind me of the bygone era of my childhood; the dim sunsets of a fuzzy summer evenings, and faint memory of fading dreams.
  • Cashier: Ah, you want to start all over do you? I know the feeling. It's enough to drive me to the brink.
  • Me: Verily. At some point, I began to live my life in retrospect. The now doesn't matter anymore because everything has become so bland. What am I to do in this monotonous life when my happy times passed so long ago. It's as if-
  • Cashier: *turns into a 9 foot tall vibrating metal cube that deconstructs me at a molecular level and turns me into pure radium powder*
  • Guy, with that as fetish who actually wrote this post: *doesn't even jack it just looks at the screen all sweaty and breathing heavily*
  • Girlfriend: *walks into the room unannounced* Everything okay? You've been acting kind of strange recently.
  • Guy: *quickly closes all tabs* Oh, nothing. I'm just like. I'm... you know. I've been tired.
  • Girlfriend: *suspiciously* ...sure. Pizza's here by the way.
  • Guy: Okay, cool. I'll be right out. *wipes sweat from head*
  • Girlfriend: *texts best friend* He's definitely cheating. He just closed like twenty tabs on his computer!!!!!!!
  • Best Friend: Did you look through his browsing history?
  • Girlfriend: Yeah, it's all wikipedia pages about radioactive stuff. It's so fucking weird. He's either cheating or a terrorist.
  • Best Friend: That's creepy. I'd break up with him.
  • Girlfriend: I've been considering it, but it's complicated. I still feel so strongly about him. I don't want to ruin our relationship.
  • Best Friend: Sometimes you have to break things off with the people you care about the most. For a little bit anyway.
  • Girlfriend: Yeah, I get that. It's so hard though. I can't imagine life without him.
  • Best Friend: You have to do what you have to do. It's the only way to move forward. Getting stuck in a stagnant relationship can ruin you.
  • Girlfriend: I guess you're right...
  • Best Friend: *is wearing a full hazmat suit.*
  • Doctor: *walks up behind her* Jennifer, stop texting. We need you in the bottom.
  • Best Friend: Sorry, got it.
  • Best Friend: *descends in elevator, sees 9 foot tall humanoid ant corpse on the ground* Fucking gross! Do you know where it came from.
  • Doctor: No clue. It's why we called you here.
  • Best Friend: This isn't like any cryptid I've ever seen. It must be extraterrestrial in origin. Wait... is its body full of gummy worms? *hears the sound of the elevator going up behind her*
  • Best Friend: Doctor! Where are you going!? What the fuck!?
  • Doctor: Waves to her from the elevator.
  • Ant Humanoids: *appear from the shadows in the hundreds*
  • Best Friend: No, no, no, no! This can't be happening.
  • Ant Humanoids: *surround her*
  • Best Friend: Don't fucking come near me! I'm highly radioactive! You'll all die if you eat me.
  • Ant Humanoid in the back: *listening to comic book podcast*
  • Podcast Guy 1: So when it comes to Superman, I feel like there are actually two characters. Clark Kent, the man. Then there's Superman, the ideal. They're the same person but represent very different aspects of him.
  • Podcast Guy 2: Comic books are fucking stupid, my dude. *cellphone buzzes* Hold up, I gotta take this.
  • Podcast Guy 2: *gets an alert that his favorite fetish forum has updated, licks lips fuckingly*
  • Podcast Guy 2: *under breath* Oh yeah. A new radium dust sexual fanfic. Can't wait to tweak my noodle to this! Zoo wee mama!
  • Podcast Guy 1: What did you just say.
  • Podcast Guy 2: Nothing, man. We were talking about Superman. Let's continue with that.
  • Podcast Guy 1: Yeah, as I was saying. Superman would definitely be a power bottom and

spookymiscreant  asked:

A concept: Kevin Day and Aaron Minyard talking mad shit about Andrew and Neil. Kevin talking about how he's sick of Andrew "pretending" he doesn't care about Exy and then Aaron replying, "I'd take that over Neil eye fucking the court every day"

i….love this….so much oh my god ok

  • so andrew and neil are on one of theyre “this is nothing but we go on weekend trips together to makeout” things 
  • so kevin needs to practice bc he’s Extra™ and…he’s still having a little trouble relaxing without andrew around all the time
    • andrew gave aaron a look before he left that aaron knows means to watch out for kevin
  • aaron’s complete disinterest manages to deter kevin from practice for two full days
    • never underestimate aaron’s ability to be stubborn to spite someone else ok
  • but finally FINALLy it’s not kevin’s incessant bitching that gets aaron to go to the court with him 
  • it’s aaron getting back from classes and not getting immediately bombarded with requests to go to the court
  • it’s coming home to a silent kevin staring out the window, rubbing his scars
  • aaron sighs deep to hide the fact that he’s concerned and changes into light workout clothes and grabs kevin
  • he also ignores how much kevin lights up when they turn onto the street of the foxhole court
    • this is an example of aaron “im not allowed to feel anything at all ever” minyard
    • also an example of aaron “knows where matt keeps a spare key to his truck” minyard
  • at first aaron refuses to practice with kevin
  • but he “gets bored” or whatever he likes to tell himself
    • see, aaron actually likes exy. he likes the way he can channel all his frustrations into it. he spends so much time studying and trying to figure out his brother and trying to figure out what the hell he wants from his life so sometimes he just needs to run around and knock people on their asses, ok?
    • its also pretty much the only times he can remember connecting with andrew
  • kevin is, like always, completely immersed, and barely notices aaron getting on the court until he walks by him to block his way to the goal
    • kevin’s on the courts because he can breathe there. he’s on the court because its where is mother put him. its the only place he mattered after she died, where he felt like a living thing rather than an asset. 
    • he’s there because even though he’s happy for andrew and neil, he really is, he’s still figuring out how to stand on his own. the court’s been the only place he really felt he could do that. 
  • now aaron may be on the court
  • he may have come to be there for kevin shut kevin up
  • but you best believe he’s gonna bitch about it
  • “fine, i’ll go, but i’m gonna complain the whole time” yea that’s aaron
  • after like one snide comment though Bitchy Kevin comes out to fuckin play and it goes a little something like:
    • kevin: andrew knows he’s good but does he try? of course not. see, that’d be fucking easy. that’d be simple. nothing is simple with him. *cue kevin taking an unnecessarily forceful shot on goal*
    • aaron: and don’t even get me started on neil just asking him for things. are you kidding. andrew doesn’t do anything ever at all and neil just??? asks him??? and he does it???
    • kevin: I KNOW. AS IF I HAVEN’T BEEN MAKING SIMPLE REQUESTS FOREVER.
    • (both of them are secretly wondering why they don’t bitch to each other more often)
  • the best part though, is when aaron is at the height of his rant and says, “You know, i don’t even want to do extra practice, but I’d take this over Neil eye fucking the court every goddamn day”
  • kevin just fucking breaks like he drops his racquet and everything
  • aaron hasn’t ever seen kevin laugh???? its kind of beautiful surprising??
  • kevin gets a hold of himself and wow
  • he doesn’t think he’s ever seen aaron smile he’s surprised how much he likes it
  • after that kevin’s feeling better 
  • they head back to the dorms and play video games for a while, order food. just kinda hang out
  • nothings really changed, per se, but….things are definitely different. 
    • more often than not now kevin will just go to the library to watch his taped games with headphones on while aaron studies, occasionally getting kicked in the shin when he gets too excited
    • when neither of them want to sleep because they know its one of those days they’ll have nightmares they go to the library’s 24 hr lounge and eat shitty microwave ramen (aaron is sworn to secrecy…no one can know kevin loves creamy chicken ramen) and try to teach each other bio or history
    • aaron only had a mother who hurt him growing up, and kevin only had the memory of his mother and people who hurt him growing up . without saying anything, they just understand.
  • in conclusion because aaron is accidentally really funny, kevin and him get a lot closer, which is good, cause they both kinda needed it
  • they wouldnt say they were friends, or are friends, but…maybe its a little “nothing” of their own
Listen up folks...

I’m not gonna talk about what sparked this rant. It doesn’t matter. What does matter is what I’m about to say.

I’m freaking done with the hate.

This SPN Family is supposed to be encouraging, accepting, we’re supposed to at least try to get along. Apparently that’s too hard. Now I could rant for hours about how some people in the SPN Family are treating eachother, but that’s for another time. This rant is going to be about one thing, the hate that the wives of the two leaders of this SPN Family receive. For this post I’m going to focus on one of the wives in particular…Danneel Ackles.

Once again as the Ackles family was nice enough to share parts of their life with us, people decide to be douchebags. This time Jensen isn’t happy with his life because he isn’t smiling in the photo of him & JJ. Also apparently comparing his kids to the comedy & tragedy is just a terrible thing to do. Oh, did you also hear that the twins might not be his because he said “my” twins instead of “our” twins. This is all Danneel’s fault too because she makes Jensen hate his life.

She can’t do anything right in the eyes of some people and it’s pissing me off. What did she do to cause so much hate? Now is the part when I ramble on about all she’s done…

She told her husband to go to a convention for the fans a few days after giving birth to twins.

Jensen told the story about finding out about the twins…JJ gave him a letter about it when he arrived at the airport…meaning he couldn’t be at the doctor appoint. How many doctor appointments do you think he had to miss because of filming?

She uses her “celebrity” to bring awareness to different events and situations going on in the world. I didn’t know about the Yulin dog festival until she talked about it. She does different work for a variety of charities, freaking google it if you don’t believe it.

Her husband is in a different country for the majority of the year while she stays back home in Austin. Have you ever had your husband away for a long period of time? Cause I have. It sucks. I complained about it on social media ALL THE TIME, but she never does.

She was a working woman in Hollywood. IMDb that shit. She was a steady worker in Hollywood however she slowed down/stopped when they had JJ.

Think of all the times she’s been out with her husband, cause that’s what Jensen is, he’s not “omg Jensen Ackles TV star”, he’s Jensen, the pain in the butt who forgot to take out the trash or forgot to grab the milk when he ran to the stores. Think about how many times she’s probably been out with him & had to deal with people coming up to talk to him. Now think about how many times this has happened & people have ignored her existence or used her as nothing more then a photo taker. Fans don’t mean too, but that shit probably happens more often then you think. I would get so sick of that.

Did I forget to mention how Jensen freaking lights up whenever someone brings up Danneel? CAUSE I WITNESSED IT IN PERSON A FEW WEEKS AGO & HE LEGIT LOOKS LIKE A TEENAGER IN LOVE WHEN SOMEONE TALKS ABOUT HER!

But no.

Apparently we’re supposed to hate her just cause.

Now is when the “haters” start to go, “you just like her because of who she’s married to.”

No haters.

No.

I knew about Danneel before I knew about Jensen. I know Danneel from One Tree Hill but I started to admire her when she hosted Maxim’s Hot 100 in 2009. She was the really pretty model/actress that I looked up to because she was funny & pretty. It wasn’t until I started watching Supernatural in 2015 that I had the “holy cow they’re married to each other” moment.

So.

To sum up this rant; you don’t have to like Danneel, just don’t be a dick. If you admire Jensen as a human, don’t disrespect his wife or his family.

Basically if you wouldn’t go up to a person & say it to their face, don’t say it. Plus why bother wasting your time hating something when you could spend your time on something you love?

End rant.

๐ŸŽถ๐ŸŽถWhen You Collect Records๐ŸŽถ๐ŸŽถ
  • Hipster: *moves dusty old boxes out of the way* Whoa, an old record player. It looks like it's in working order too! *runs outside*
  • Hipster: Yo, dad!
  • Dad: What?
  • Hipster: We're getting rid of all of poppop's stuff, right?
  • Dad: There's something you want, isn't there?
  • Hipster: There's this old stereo record player in the attic.
  • Dad: What do you need a record player for?
  • Hipster: My record collection.
  • Dad: I didn't even know they still made those things. Can't you just listen to music on your phone?
  • Hipster: Dad, there's a big difference between listening to music digitally and on record.
  • Dad: Fine, I don't wanna get into it with you right now. You can take the record player. You just have to get someone else to take it to your place for you. My truck's full.
  • Hipster: Thanks dad! *smooches dad on the cheek*
  • *later at hipster's apartment*
  • Friend: So, like Patch Adams ends with Patch Adams half-naked in front of a ton of people. I don't know if it was meant to be funny or like a weird sex thing, but like the movie was just a deeply disturbing character study. I can't stop thinking about it.
  • Hipster: That sounds boring. *unlocks door to apartment* Ta-da! Here it is! My new record player!
  • Friend: New? Looks fucking old to me, dude.
  • Hipster: Well, it is old. That's the appeal. And we're going to listen to the new Sufjan record on it.
  • Friend: Is that actually how you say Sufjan? Apparently, I've been pronouncing it wrong this whole time.
  • Hipster: Well, you won't after this record. There's an entire track where he just says his name for four minutes. It's amazing. *plays records*
  • Record Player: *coughs* Hello. Hello! Where am I? Doctor? Hello! Why is it so dark...............................Can I breathe? I can't breath. Oh god, I'm not breathing! Oh god, oh god, oh god, oh god, oh god! I.....................................
  • Hipster: Uh, that's not Sufjan.
  • Friend: It totally isn't. Is it some guest vocalist? I like the new direction he's going in. No instruments or singing, and long stretches of silence. Very experimental.
  • Hipster: *stops record player* I think maybe we should do something else for now.
  • Friend: Fucking lame! I wanted to listen to more Sufjan.
  • *days later at the record store*
  • Hipster: Yo, I think the Sufjan Stevens record I bought from here might be some kind of mispress.
  • Store Clerk: Really? It's a pretty major album. I doubt there'd just be a mispress like that.
  • Hipster: Yeah, but listen to it. It's not Sufjan at all. It's some girl talking.
  • *hipster and clerk listen to a completely normal Sufjan Stevens album together*
  • Store Clerk: What are you talking about? This is definitely Sufjan Stevens.
  • Hipster: Okay, but it wasn't like that when I listened to it at home! I even listened to it with my friend and he heard the same thing!
  • Store Clerk: Maybe there's something wrong with your record player.
  • Hipster: Hmm, maybe there is.
  • *back at the apartment*
  • Hipster: *turns on record player and just listens*
  • Record Player: ...I'm awake again. Why did I black out? Did I even black out? God, I'm not breathing, but it doesn't matter. Why don't I need to breathe? Am I even alive?
  • Hipster: Can you hear me?
  • Record Player: Doctor. Doctor! DOCTOR! Why can't I move? Why can't I feel anything. Keep yourself together. It'll all make sense soon. Calm down. Just breathe deeply. Fuck, I can't breathe! AIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEE! I CAN'T BREATHE! DOCTOR! DOCTOR! DOCTOR! HELP! HELP ME, PLEASE! I'M STUCK! I CAN'T MOVE! PLEASE HELP ME!
  • Hipster: *turns off record player* It's just a recording, I bet. I can't believe I talked to it like an idiot... *nervously turns record player back on*
  • Record Player: I blacked out again. I blacked out. For how long? Is there even time here? Hell. This is hell, right? Did I go to hell.........................................
  • Hipster: *listens to the record player for hours*
  • Record Player: Negative 6893 bottles of wine on the wall! Negative 6893 bottles of wine! Take one down, pass it around, Negative 6894 bottles of wine on the wall... fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck! PLEASE SOMEONE HELP ME! AIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
  • Hipster: *keeps listening*
  • Record Player: Soul of Christ, make me holy, Body of Christ, be my salvation. God, please forgive me. I'm sorry for all of my sins. Please free me. I'm so sorry. Please. Please. Please.
  • Hipster: *still listening*
  • Record Player: FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU! SHITTY DOCTOR! FUCK YOU! LET ME OUT! LET ME OUT! *sobs intensely* FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU! FUCK EVERYTHING! Please just let me go.
  • Hipster: *nervously walks up to record player and lightly taps on it*
  • Record Player: ...A knock. A KNOCK! PLEASE HELP ME! I'M STUCK! PLEASE! *record player begins shake violently*
  • Hipster: *backs away in fear*
  • Record Player: HELP! HELP! HELP ME! PLEASE, IF SOMEONE'S THERE, HELP ME! HELP ME! I'M STUCK! GET ME OUT OF HERE, PLEASE!
  • Hipster: *unplugs record player*
  • Hipster: *gets hammer from the closet and begins to break apart record player*
  • Record Player: *drips red*
  • Hipster: W-What? *cracks front of record player open*
  • *rotting viscera falls from the record player*
  • Hipster: O-Oh... *stuffs viscera back into the record player and duct tapes over it*
  • Hipster: *turns record player back on*
  • Record Player: ...I can feel. It hurts. Why does it hurt now? Why does it hurt? Why? Why? Why? WHY!? WHY!? WHY!? *spurts blood through it speakers and begins to gurgle*
  • Record Player: *hops forward* Please just let me go. Please... please. I'll do anything. I just want to see you again. I'm so sorry. This isn't what I asked for. I'm so sorry. *hops forward again and comes unplugged*
  • Record Player: *tips over, bleeding heavily onto the carpet*
  • Hipster: *silently cleans up the mess*
  • *some time later*
  • Hipster: *calls dad* Hey, dad. Oh, nothing. Uh, I just need to borrow your truck, If not tonight sometime this week. I just need to get rid of something. No, no, that's fine, I can do it myself. Yeah, tomorrow morning is perfect. Thanks Love you too. Bye.
  • *the next afternoon*
  • Dad: So, what did you need to get rid of this morning?
  • Hipster: Nothing important. Just some old junk... Dad, what kind of person was poppop?
  • Dad: Well, he was only the greatest man I've known in my life. Really caring, dedicated to his family. When you were born he loved you so much. He was a bit of a loner, though. It took a lot to get him to open up. Even around me and your grandmother. He was a bit like you. Always a huge music lover.
  • Hipster: I see. Was he ever a doctor?
  • Dad: That's a weird thing to ask. Nope. He hated doctors. Didn't trust modern medicine one bit. It's ironic. His cancer probably wouldn't have gotten to him if he did. But, your poppop was always so stubborn.
  • Hipster: Oh, okay then.
  • *some days later*
  • Friend: New carpet?
  • Hipster: Yup, old one was ugly wasn't it. It was time for a change.
  • Friend: That's what I've been telling you! I'm glad you finally came to your senses. What happened to your record player, though?
  • Hipster: That thing? I threw it away. It was busted.
  • Friend: That sucks. Are you gonna buy a new one?
  • Hipster: No.
  • Friend: But you won't have anything to play your records on.
  • Hipster: Yeah, but I buy records because I want to support the artists. They're not really for listening. Besides, lossless is better. FLAC is the future.
“Darkiplier VS Antisepticeye” is Mark’s Effort to Take Back Control From Dark: A Theory

(Disclaimer: I know nothing about any of Jack’s egos, so this is entirely about Mark’s. Disclaimer 2, Electric Boogaloo: I had my Frosted Mini Wheats like two hours late today, and that threw off my groove, so I’m sorry if I’m less eloquent than usual. Disclaimer III- This Time, It’s Personal: The only reason this isn’t under a read more is because someone told me to do that last time, but they weren’t very nice about it, so now I’m being petty. I’m sorry for being the worst. I still love you guys, though.)

In my last theory, we discussed the possibility that Dark is trying to take back control through more subtle means this time, and that he has a plan that we didn’t get to see during Markiplier TV. He’s been slowly giving hints of his existence in videos, teasing just enough to get people talking. He hasn’t revealed himself outright in any videos since Markiplier TV; he hasn’t denied being in them, either. 

Remember this interaction between @markiplier and @hufflepufftrax?

Mark quickly dispels rumors about Darkiplier when they’re not true. Why, then, would he not clear the air during the chaos of World’s Quietest Let’s Play 4, or any other video that has stirred up the community a great deal more than this photo ever did? The logical train of thought, then, is that these really were Dark appearances and we are supposed to know it. So, if Dark has been going about this so carefully all along, why would he reveal himself by sharing the spotlight in a comedy sketch? The short answer is that he wouldn’t. The reality is… say it with me now… it’s just Mark impersonating Dark!

Yeah, I know, no shock there. You’ve been hearing that since the video dropped. I talked about it when answering an ask, which I’m screenshotting and dropping below for your convenience, because I’m just a nice gal like that.

So now we have to ask, why would Mark do this? If Dark really is starting to take back control, this would be a dangerous time to pull a stunt like this, wouldn’t it? Well, it makes sense when you consider the fact that Mark has all but run out of options. 

Every time Dark is hinted at, the community goes wild. It doesn’t matter how subtle the hint may be- if the lights in the background of a video are red and blue, someone will point it out. Someone will draw him. Someone will get excited. And then, over time, everyone will get excited. 

Even if Mark tried to warn us, it only fueled the fire. Reaching out for help, trying to tell us that Dark is here– it is exactly what Dark wants. So Mark now has to try a different tactic. The only way that Dark can lose at this point is if he loses his allure to the viewers, and the only way to do that is to use his own method against him: Dark is pretending to be Mark, and now Mark is pretending to be Dark in order to discredit him. More specifically, he’s trying to get Dark out of the way, impersonate him, and make a fool out of him. That sounds… familiar, doesn’t it? Have we heard that somewhere before?

What if I change up the tense a little and word it a bit more like this?

“Pushed aside. Replaced. Mocked.”

Originally posted by rubies-and-oaktrees

That rings a few more bells, doesn’t it?

When we put all of these things together, a picture starts to form: Mark kept Dark at bay for years by making him a joke, but then he made the mistake of letting down his guard. Letting him back in. Now, Mark is fighting back using the only method that he has ever known to work. Why wouldn’t it this time? Making silly edits, taking over Mark’s twitter with edgy, emo poetry… it was enough to dissuade the community last time. So what could make it fail now? How could humor no longer be sufficient to drive Dark away?

The key difference this time is that Dark is not simply a wisp of a presence like he was years ago. He can’t be laughed off anymore. He is here. He is real. He is powerful. He does not like to be mocked, and this action from Mark will most definitely have consequences.

And the blame for that, really, falls on all of us. As Mark said all those years ago, we made Dark real.  Back then, he had to resort to humor to keep Dark at bay, because none of us would listen to him when he warned us. Now, history’s repeating itself,  but the outcome isn’t so sure this time. We learned nothing in the process. Now Dark has become too strong, because we, the viewers, keep letting him back in. Mark tries to tell us that Dark is here and we are thrilled about it.

So, really, the question isn’t, “Why would Mark do this?”

The question is, 

Why didn’t we listen?

anonymous asked:

Soulmate AU where Lena covers up her mark because she doesn't want to be rejected by her soulmate too

Most people in the world donโ€™t have soul marks, because most people in the world donโ€™t need a soulmate. Lionel is drunk when he explains this to Lena, though she wonโ€™t realize that until sheโ€™s much older, looking back on the memory with all the clarity of an adult.

โ€œSome people are a little easier to love than we are, Lena,โ€ he tells her heavily. โ€œIt doesnโ€™t take anyone special to do it - there are thousands of people who could love them. But youโ€™re like me, Iโ€™m afraid - youโ€™re damn smart, but youโ€™re never going to be lovable.โ€

He shows Lena his soul mark, a thin geometric shape on his collar, and Lena traces her tiny fingers over it, curious. It doesnโ€™t look like hers at all - hers is on her stomach, made up of soft curves and swoops that remind her somehow of birds.

She is only 5 years old, and sheโ€™s only been living with the Luthors for a year. She is pleased to be invited into Lionelโ€™s big study, with the heavy tan globe that she can spin around on its heavy base. She is pleased to hear him say that she is like him, and to find out they have something in common. It feels a little like belonging.

Keep reading

The Side

When I met him he was with her. Like she was standing right next to him & I didn’t care. I didn’t give a fragment of a fuck that he probably fucked her on a weekly basis. I had had three drinks and two shots, so I decided to shoot my own. When he looked at me he tilted his head to the left & lingered for too long before looking away. That’s how I knew I wasn’t the only one. When she went to the bathroom I walked over, took his phone & put my number in it. Told him to text me and all he said was “okay”. I left an hour later with my friends & when I got in the house I got a text from a random number that said “this is me texting you.” That’s how we started.

By the next week, he had made it over to Brooklyn from Queens to watch me sit by the window & fan myself because even though it was summer & I was determined to catch a slight breeze. He walked over to brush the hair out of my face. I looked up and grabbed his hand. “Why are you here?” I asked him & he said “because I’m supposed to be”, plainly. I let his hand go. It made its way to my chin & tilted my face up. He looked at me for a while & said “I like the space between your ears.” “My face?” I asked & he said “I mean yeah but it’s more than your face, it’s your mind too. You make all these faces & I don’t know…..it’s like I can’t not look. You know?” I looked back out the window. “Yeah I know”, I said while the this woman scooped rainbow ices out of her cart for a mother and her daughter. “You do this thing when you’re zoned out where your lips slightly part & your blinking slows & I just wanna stop time. It sounds stupid but yeah I know what you mean.” “Nah it doesn't” he’d said, walking back to my bed. He picked up the book on my nightstand as he laid down. “I read this before” he said. I looked away from the couple laughing while they waited to cross the street and back at him splayed out across my sheets. “Yeah me too.” “So why are you reading it again?” he asked & I told him it’s “because you can never read the same thing twice.”

I’d be in the kitchen washing dishes at the sink & he’d come sit on the counter & watch me. Once he asked if we could watch a movie when I was finished. “You can start it now & I’ll come watch when I’m done.” I said. “But I want to start and end it with you.” he replied. I dropped the bowl I was rinsing. I decided that the dishes could wait. We decided we’d rather watch the sun go down & right when dark had covered my room he reached out for my hand. I gave him my heart instead. You can’t give someone that much responsibility though. I didn’t know that then. Picture him on a tight rope trying to balance himself with my heart in his hands. I thought I was worth the risk though.

We never talked about her. I’m not sure why though. It was this unspoken thing. I’d ask if he wanted to come over later. He’d say no & I’d know why. He’d walk me to my door, say “have a good night” & I’d know. He wouldn’t text or call & I’d know. Once I was out with some friends & saw them at a bar. I sat at there, ordering drink after drink and laughed hysterically at things that weren’t funny because I wanted to scream. He text me later & asked if I got home okay. I replied “like you really give a fuck.” & twenty minutes later he was downstairs ringing my bell. I didn’t know who it was & because the intercom was shitty, I buzzed him in. I opened the door & before I could tell him to leave he’d pushed me back into the apartment, up onto my kitchen counter and kissed me. “I give a fuck.” he said, after he pulled away. I tried to push him off of me. Stop. Stop. I wasn’t talking to him though.

We only fucked when I was drunk, when all my faculties weren’t there. He said he liked when I was uninhibited because I talked to much when I was sober. Didn’t allow myself to feel things. He liked the way I felt. He liked how I made him feel. I felt like I was losing myself in him & I didn’t have a map. He’d be unbuttoning my pants or pulling up my skirt & I’d say to myself this isn’t fair. But when is life ever really fair?

I ended up meeting a guy at this get together for my coworker & we hit it off. Cut to us at dinner two weeks later after heavy texting. I was enjoying myself and thinking this is normal. We went for a walk after dinner & in the middle of crossing the street our hands intertwined. It was natural & we didn’t let go. He told me he liked the way my eyes got wide when I talked about my favorite books. He got me a cab home and when I got upstairs I took my phone out of my jacket pocket to thank him for a wonderful night. But instead I had two text messages. I want to see you. Now. No was my reply. I put my phone on the charger & went to take a shower. When I got out I had three missed calls. I called back after I had gotten dressed and when he picked up he said I miss you. Of course I missed him too but I wouldn’t admit it. Come over I told him. When I stepped into the hall to wait for/watch him come up the stairs to my third floor apartment, I asked myself why I couldn’t just be normal.

They had met through a friend and he recognized her from a couple pictures on instagram they’d posted. “She’s a good person.” he told me one day after he got out the shower. “Good people are only good for good people. If you were a good person you wouldn’t be here every week telling me how good I feel, how good I taste. I was a good person before you.” “Now you’re great” he said as he crawled over to me on the bed. I pulled away & he understood. He laid across my thighs on his back staring at the ceiling & said “I don’t feel bad about being here. I never have. You never let me finish. She is a good person but you’re good for me.” I propped my knee up and pushed his head off playfully. He laughed, sat up, hovered over me & lowered himself to kiss me. I didn’t pull away but I should’ve.

He used to say shit like when you know who you are, you know who you’re not and I’d think that was some deep shit. But I ain’t have to know who I was to know I wasn’t the one he came home to.

anonymous asked:

why does it matter so much that Clint wasn't deaf in the MCU??? Like it's not super important to his character? I don't know why you're all worked up about this because it literally doesn't even really matter??? if the first anon was annoyed by your always writing sign language into your fics they have a right to be??? the things you write aren't just yours you have to respe ct your audience

*sighs heavily* So okay here’s the thing. It actually does matter that Clint wasn’t deaf. It really really really really matters. And you know why it really matters? Because for YEARS I have been super self-conscious about being Hard of Hearing, to the point that I didn’t tell people. I’d just pretend to know what people were saying even if I didn’t (believe me, I didn’t). If I had, at an earlier age, seen a deaf superhero asking his colleagues to speak up, to face him so he could read their lips, wearing hearing aids– god I would’ve been so much less embarrassed about doing those things too.

I think about the kids I see at my work in the grocery store and at Lush, kids with hearing aids, whose hands fumble over signs, and I feel this pang in my chest for them. Not because they’re “pitiful”, but because there are people who don’t realize what kind of community they’re going to grow up in. People who don’t care about the way the world works for them, for us. They don’t know they could be superheroes. Because people like Joss Whedon take that away from them without blinking.

Representation really matters. Especially when it comes to some sort of disability or shift in the perspective of what is “normal”. The same way you wouldn’t write a fic in which Matt Murdock wasn’t blind, you shouldn’t film a movie in which Clint Barton isn’t deaf. Because that is part of who he is.
And by writing a script in which his deafness isn’t recognized sends a very clear message to the deaf/hoh community, which is: “people like you could never be superheroes” and even worse, “representing your community is not worth the effort”.

Secondly, I need you to read this very clearly: I will never ever write a fic in which Clint Barton is hearing, or a fic in which he does not utilize ASL. If that “bothers” my audience, or they feel disrespected by this fact, they are very kindly directed to this website and may follow the directions as follows.