and it only took us minutes!

100 Dialogue Prompts: Part 3

And we did it again, amigos! 

  1. “My sock is missing.”
  2. “I must say it can be rather therapeutic”
  3. “Shit, they spotted us. Quick, put your Obama mask on.”
  4. “You raided my village, killed my parents and slaughtered tens of innocent people. I was able to forgive you for all of that-tell myself it was in your nature. But then you did something heinous. Something beyond all possible hope of redemption. You killed my dog.”
  5. “What do you mean you accidentally assassinated the Pope!?”
  6. “I would love to give a fuck about you but sadly my last one went off to war and never returned”
  7. “If you think I’ll stop my quest for world domination for a bag of cookies, you are,,, right… Now, gimme that!”
  8. “What are you doing with that rubber duckie toy– OH DEAR GOD LORD HAVE MERCY”
  9. “I’m more afraid of myself than you.”
  10. “I already told you, there’s nothing we can do about the fights. We COULD if you stopped spoiling shows and books to everyone.”
  11. “You, my friend, are the most unnecessary when it comes to your excessively sassy attitude.”
  12. “I love you.” “…..What? OH APRIL FOOLS.”
  13. “What is this, a concert for ants???”
  14. “I made it! I’m in the list! This is being a great day since I remembered it’s a Thursday, not a Monday!”
  15. “It’s not that I don’t believe you. It’s just that, well, I’ve got a sink full of dishes and a cat to wash.”
  16. “When you said i had pretty eyes i thought you were complimenting me,not trying to buy them!”
  17. “The wolves eat tonight.”
  18. “Gee, thanks for nearly killing me because of ____!” “Listen up here, are you dead? You’d better be greateful you’re still alive tou little shit.”
  19. "When you said you could fly, this isn’t exactly what I had in mind.”
  20. “Sarah, I love you and all but hOW ON EARTH DO YOU KEEP SENDING OUR PETS TO SPACE?!”
  21. “Look, just because you kidnapped me doesn’t mean I’m going to marry you.”
  22. “How in God’s name did you even get up there?!”
  23. “I think I misplaced my right hand”
  24. “I did it! I got into university!” “That’s great! What course?” “Uh… Would it be a bad thing if I told you that… Dark magic and villainy?”
  25. “Well, it just so happens that I have been a homeless man for three years now. That must mean I’m the chosen one!”
  26. “Have your eyes always been that colour?”
  27. “I’m going to fight the sun!”
  28. “You can’t just run around punching people you don’t like, ____!”
  29. “I’m not into that kinda thing.”
  30. “Dude why did you eat all that cake on your own?”
  31. “I just wanted to know if we could use a plastic knife”
  32. “Uhhhh, guys? Don’t hate me, but I think I just released Satan”
  33. “Well, fine… Just wait a little bit before you do something stupid.” “…”
  34. “What do you mean there’s no bacon flavored ice cream!?”
  35. “What do you mean you’re my sister? I don’t have a sister!”
  36. “Why the hell do we need a duck to hunt Bigfoot?”
  37. “Oh, so you can do pink explosions too”
  38. “This isn’t my kitchen, is it?”
  39. “Ohhh, so THAT’S what you meant by ‘shooting starts’.”
  40. “ACHOO” “bless you” “Thank you, wait a minute I live alone”
  41. “Put my creepy cat in a different room? Don’t be silly! I don’t even have a cat!”
  42. “Katie, please stop shooting me with tranquilizer darts.”
  43. “Why did you think it was a good idea to only bring a potato to this heist?”
  44. “Okay, we make this promise now - nobody look at that fucking goat ever again.”
  45. “Sarah, why is the cat naked?”
  46. “Wait. You’re aroused?”
  47. “Why would that surprise you?”
  48. “It does on account of you being covered in blood. Wipe that smile off your face. You look like a cat in heat.”
  49. “okay so let me get this straight, you’re not actually my long lost twin…” “yes.” “…because you’re me from another dimension” “…yes.”
  50. “I’m sorry, but did that thing just talk?”
  51. “I thought we promised to never speak of that incident again!”
  52. "Sweetheart”“Yes dear”“Some of your morally challenged friends are trying to kidnap me again.”“And?”“And!?”“You’re a big girl, you can take care of yourself.”“Of course I can, but the gesture would have been nice!”
  53. “how many epilepsy pills can you take before you overdose?” “Just one or two.” “I’m gonna have to call you back.”
  54. “…I was GOING to ask why there’s a pink goo all over the kitchen floor but I think that can wait whilst I ask what the FUCK IS GOING ON?”
  55. “For the last time, can you stop calling that thing 'human’”
  56. “Okay, that is a seriously dodgy looking hat-are you certain you’re right about this?”
  57. “Really Darling, you can stop trying to scream, we’ve already espablished that no one cares and it’s giving you unflattering lines on your forehead.”
  58. “_______, why am I on the ceiling?”
  59. “What the heck happened while I was at the store?
  60. "What the actual fuck!” “I did warn-” “Yes I know you said you were crazy, but this…. This is…” “Just another Tuesday. Oh we’re late for tea!” “With who?!” “With the Queen of course, who else?”
  61. “Despreate times call for cows.”
  62. “Did you burn the last piece of toast again?”
  63. “You didn’t TELL me there’d be free food!”
  64. “Did Jesus really die for this bullshit?”
  65. “Do you want the apocalypse?!! Because that’s how you get the apocalypse!!!”
  66. “Goddamit, I’m dead again aren’t I? How the hell did I do it this time?”
  67. “Dude, no.”
  68. “I may be a horrible person, but at least I am an honest one.”
  69. “I told you, I dress to kill, now fetch me my fancy stilettos, mama’s gonna slay tonight!”
  70. “I left the room for 3 minutes and you really want to tell me you started a war with every single planet?” “Well, I told you 3 months ago to not leave me alone.” “And I told you I have to use the bathroom 3 months ago!”
  71. “Wow, only took 3 minutes to destroy the world.” “Let’s see if I can do it in 2!”
  72. “So… Wh-Why- How did you flush the duck down the toilet?”
  73. “dude. i liked that carpet. do you know how hard it is to wash bloodstains out of carpets.”
  74. “Don’t worry, it’s much worse than it looks.”
  75. “What are you doing ___?” “I’m camping.” “No you’re beside tree with a blank-” “CAMPING”
  76. “WHAT THE FUCK IS A DUCKPOTATO”
  77. “PUT THE PUPPY DOWN AND FIGHT ME LIKE A MAN!”
  78. “PLEASE DON’T HANG UP! YOU AND YOUR FAMILY ARE IN DANGER!”
  79. “What the hell kind of scream was that? And how did you make it?! ”
  80. “Hey, uhm… Hate to interrupt your conversation, but why the fuck is there a giraffe on the soup aisle”
  81. “You mean to tell me that somebody decided it was a good idea to cross plums and apricots, but nobody can figure out why my cat has RABBIT ears?”
  82. “Sorry but um… why is there a fox and a bear singing Ooh la la by Britney Spears on the balcony? And where is my chicken, Pudding?!”
  83. “Where did you get LIGHT-UP COMBAT BOOTS? THEY CHANGE COLOR?!”
  84. “So you’re telling me there was a genie trapped in that can of soup? And you accidentally ATE THE GENIE?!”
  85. “Listen…don’t take this the wrong way, but…I love the OTHER you better.”
  86. “Tell me why,  exactly, did you need the rubber chicken? ”
  87. “Look, I’m not a liar, alright?  And I ain’t overdramatic or hyperbolic or whatever else you wanna call me.  So when I say I would sell my soul for a pancake right now, I mean I will literally sell my soul for a pancake right now.  And maybe a million dollars.”
  88. “Wait a second, you’re telling me that….. YOU’VE BEEN DATING SATAN BEHIND MY BACK FOR FOUR WHOLE YEARS?!!!”
  89. “Well dad did say he would be gone for five days…what the hell? Let’s go to the corner store!”
  90. “Why did you buy 74 melons?!”
  91. “Where’s the toaster?” “It’s in the kitchen… Why do you have a fork?” “K, thanks.”
  92. “Death, out of all the things in this world, why are so afraid of ____?”
  93. “This floor is like my life; Cold and Hard.”
  94. “So you’re telling me that I am the only thing that is preventing a Third World War, right?” “Yeah, pretty much.”
  95. “I don’t know your name and you don’t know mine but I promise it will turn out okay.”
  96. “Little did you know, they were slowly turning into werewolves.”
  97. “Umm… I may have possibly accidentally blown up another planet”
  98. “I told you not to do that… now look, you’ve lost your hand!”
  99. “Every time you speak I literally die a little”
  100. “One baby soul please, Adult souls give me gas!”

“I need you, yes you (you should feel targeted), to come up with a new dialogue prompt for part 4 and leave it in the comments below. It’s fun and the first 100 replies will make the next list. As always, one prompt per amigo and don’t forget the doubles quotes “”. Pantoffel” (Click here for part 1 and here for part 2)

Netflix Customer Service

Alright everyone! So I’ve just finished getting off a 20 minute call with customer service. The lady that took my call was the sweetest thing. What she said? They’ve been receiving calls like crazy about the cancellation of sense8 from left to right. She also told me there have been some angry callers, but please guys, if you want something done, please be kind, being angry isn’t going to help when you’re talking to these people. She also told me that EVERY SINGLE FEEDBACK THEY RECEIVE FROM US COUNTS AND THEY TAKE IT SERIOUSLY. As she also said that Netflix is probably the only company she knows that does this. I spoke to her about the possibility of there being at least a special or a movie so we may be able to get a good and decent finale. Everything that we tell these people is being typed down and sent to headquarters. I came to ask as well about the possibility of Netflix selling the show forward and she said she wouldn’t know about that and told me that they can possibly keep making money off of sense8 if it’s still there. Make sure you guys tell them that if they cancelled it because they weren’t getting enough views; I specifically said to her “if you’re going to cancel it because it’s not getting enough views, excuse my language, but advertise your shit”. Why keep making money from a show that’s been cancelled if you’re not getting views and you’re not willing to promote it. I live in New York City and the only time there was ever something concerning sense8 here was the season 2 premiere which was amazing. Please let them know what this show means to you as well. She told me that people have called her and told her that they’re cancelling their accounts and this is happening fast where people are unsubscribing. Everything we do for this show makes a difference. She told me to lets keep our heads up and stay on the lookout which I won’t say it’s essentially a good thing but we’re doing good. So keep up the good work everyone, lets keep doing this!

Anything is possible.

The customer service line is 1-866-579-7172
PLEASE MAKE SURE TO BE KIND!

I’m trying so hard to beat you at your own game. I want to wait to read your messages for hours, to see your messages and not reply. I wish I could play along, I thought I had it in me to act like I don’t care. To be honest I didn’t think I would ever care again.

But here I am, you took 6 hours to reply to my message and I am using every ounce of strength to not open and reply to you after only 2 minutes.

—  I hate that this is such an uneven playing field 
SKAM S04E08 Clip 6 - Happy Birthday to you

ADAM: We’re fasting. We’re not having hotdogs.

ESKILD: Is that Fedon Lindberg, or who is it?

LINN: I’ve probably had chlamydia like thirteen times, it’s like.. Just take some antibiotics and it’s gone.

VILDE: Yeah.

LINN: But in the eye? I haven’t heard that one before.

EVEN: You can just do it from your side. Should I do it now? Bad hit!

ELIAS: Awesome! Look what he did now.

EVEN: Hey, guys!

MAGNUS: Hey! Hey. I’m Magnus.

ELIAS: I’m Elias.

MAGNUS: You know my girlfriend.

ELIAS: Oh.. The blonde one?

MAGNUS: Yeah.

ELIAS: Right! Yeah, yeah, yeah. She has talked lots about you.

MAGNUS: She did?

ELIAS: Yeah, she talked about you a lot.

MAGNUS: What does she say about me?

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Why You Should Pay Attention In Class, Feat. Dad and Dr. Puck

Gather ‘Round everyone, it’s time for another installment of Family Lore!

So back in the late 60′s  dad was getting his undergraduate at Cal Poly, because Dad was an early proto-nerd  (like really, he wrote a bunch of the groundwork for the thing that would eventually become the internet), and Cal Poly had one of the first comp sci programs in the country.   Also, it was like 10 miles from home, so he didn’t have to move out. However, because this was undergrad, dad had to take a bunch of non-major courses, so he decided to do geology because he’d been good at identifying rocks in boy scouts.

The course was taught by  gentleman named Dr. Puck, yes really, who was a brilliant geologist, but teaching a bunch of somewhat uninterested just-out-of-high-school kids about rocks can wear on you, even if you aren’t some sort of deranged fey creature.  So he tried his best to make it interesting, and Dad and most of the other kids had a fairly interesting time.

HOWEVER

Dad recounts that there were two girls in class who spent the entire time blowing off lecture, talking and generally being a distracting nuisance, until they heard that a quiz was coming up, then they’d pester and bully anyone for notes, usually Dad.  This went on for about three months and virtually everyone in class was grinding their teeth at these two, but Dad in particular, who did not appreciate being accosted in the hall by these two, who would alternately offer sexual favors for his notes, or threaten to start rumors about him if he didn’t help them study.  Puck knew some shit was up, but dad wasn’t eager to start legal action in his first semester, not to mention it was the 60′s and rampant patriarchy would have meant nobody would have believed him.

One Day, Dr. Puck organized a field for the class to the Santa Cruz Mountains, which are full of all manner of interesting geology things, most notably, fossils.  Really stinking cool ones.  Everyone is having a nice time hiking through the hills, looking at all the picturesque geology, when they round a corner and see a Big Goddamn RIB, just sticking out of the side of the trail.  Everyone goes OOOOOOH appreciatively, and Puck explains that this is an ancient Whale that UC Santa Cruz was digging up, but he knew someone in their geo department, so he got the goods on the site.

He then explains, in grand gestures and with the sort of vivacity that only people of Fey ancestry can muster, how this used to be an ancient seabed, but due to the magic Natural Geologic Process of Continental drift and Uplift, this whale was now some 2000 feet above sea level.  He spent a good twenty minutes telling the tale, while everyone took notes.

Almost everyone.

Literally the moment after Puck finished, one of the girls finally noticed the GIANT FUCKING RIB and asked him “But Dr. Puck- how did  whale get all the way up here?”

Puck, somehow, did not explode, but instead stood up to his full five-feet-and-one-and-one half-inches and explained in his most deadpan, eloquent lecture voice.

“This is a Great Flying Whale of the Cretaceous Period.”  He gestured at the Rib.  “They used to migrate here to Santa Cruz to breed, from their winter grounds in Hawaii, and would build magnificent nests out of kelp.”

Dad recalls stuffing his notes into his mouth to keep from laughing.  His more silver-tongued classmates began to chip in.

“Didn’t they used to eat Stegosaurs?  Just swooped down and gobbled them up.”  a student asked, trying not to snicker.

“Indeed!  They were far from the gentle giants we have today!” Puck agreed.  “Teeth the size of your arm, and long sticky tongues to catch smaller prey with.”

“How did they fly?” Asked another, ready to hear a choice piece of bullshit.

“Oh, gravity was much weaker back then, so they could ‘swim’ through the air with only the aid of a few helium bladders.”  he nodded sagely.  “Yes, and when they fossilized, the bladders were preserved.  Santa Cruz has some of the finest Helium mines in the world thanks to these magnificent beasts.”

“Wow.”  Muttered one of the girls, scribbling notes furiously.  Dad unwaded the parper from his mouth, ready to drive the nail into the coffin.

“Is this going to be on the test?” He asked, sweetly.

“Oh yes.”  Puck nodded gravely.

Sure enough, two weeks later, there was a test, and at the very bottom was the following:

“EXTRA CREDIT: explain everything innacurate/wrong about The Great Flying Whales Of The Cretaceous Period.  One Point per Idea that makes me Laugh.”

And that’s how Dad walked out of geology with 106% and the invaluable knowledge that people will believe ANYTHING if you speak with enough conviction.

anonymous asked:

Ooh in that case a 10 times sex went hilariously wrong list??

top 10 times things went wrong during sex!!

Could you do a Top 10 With the FUN STORIES ABOUT THINGS GOING WRONG DURING SEX? This is from the ASK about Yuuri more silly and confident.

You mentioned “amusing ‘things going wrong during sex’ stories” and now I’m wondering if that could be made into a top ten list? (≧∇≦)

Top ten ‘things going wrong during sex’ stories!!!!!!

 Since you mentioned it in a previous ask, would you mind doing a top 10 things going wrong and / or funny things which happened during Victor and Yuuri having sex? :P

 The Top 10 ‘things going wrong during sex’ stories should definitely be a thing, but i’m not going to press you to write more (even if not explicit) sex scenes. But it would be and absolutely hilarious topic (and it would be definitely be commented in some drunk-ish after party, just let it on Chris hands). 

————–

wow, you guys really wanted this one so I bumped it to the top of the queue! 

————–



Top 10 Times Things Went Wrong During Sex:

10) One time they were in a single bed and Yuuri was riding Viktor but halfway through Viktor decided to flip them over so that he was on top. The only problem was that he was used to having a king-sized bed and so instead of rolling them over he just dumped them both on the floor instead. It took Yuuri five full minutes to stop laughing

9) In reference to one of my previous top tens, during their first visit to Yuuri’s parents Yuuri refused to have sex at all in his parent’s house surrounded by his family. And Viktor totally respected that but after two weeks of blue balls he and Yuuri were taking Vicchan and Makkachin for a walk on the beach and he basically jumped Yuuri, who was very down with that idea. Which was great in the moment but afterwards Yuuri kept giving him death glares like ‘I have sand in my clothes, I have sand in my hair I have sand in places where sand is never supposed to be’.

8) During their second visit to the onsen, Yuuri refused to have sex in the onsen itself but Viktor did manage to convince Yuuri to let Viktor give him a blowjob after they got out of the water. But since they had just spent a really long time in very hot water and most of Yuuri’s blood was…not in his head, he ended up fainting at a really not opportune moment. Viktor freaked out and was terrified that Yuuri was seriously hurt but he woke up after a couple of seconds and Mari just stuck a cold cloth on his head, told him to suck it up and smirked at them both because Yuuri had been using the hot springs since he was a kid so she knew their story about him fainting from it just being too hot was complete bullshit.

7) Once they were being pretty athletic and adventurous which was going great until Viktor accidentally pulled a muscle and Yuuri teased him mercilessly about being an old man who couldn’t keep up with his athlete boyfriend anymore. The main problem came when Viktor had to explain to people at the rink how he pulled a muscle because neither of them wanted to tell the truth. Everyone figured it out anyway.

6) Once Viktor forgot to lock the bedroom door and Makkachin jumped onto the bed between them mid sex. They both screamed and jumped apart and it completely ruined the mood and then they couldn’t bring themselves to push Makkachin off the bed and lock him out again to continue because he looked too happy.

5) There was a time when Viktor convinced Yuuri to try being blindfolded which Yuuri decided to try out. But they didn’t bet on Yuuri being really jumpy without his vision and prone to startling so at one point Viktor leant down to give him a blowjob without warning him first and he jerked on instinct and accidentally kicked Viktor in the face. It took them about 10 minutes to stop the nosebleed but they were able to laugh about it afterwards once Yuuri stopped panicking.

4) They were once in the shower together and Viktor decided to try and pick Yuuri up like in chapter 13. Except he didn’t account for the fact that it is a lot harder to pick someone up in the shower surrounded by water and so he slipped, dropped Yuuri and broke their shower rack by grabbing onto it to try and stay upright.

3) Yuuri really likes pulling Viktor’s hair during sex and Viktor really likes getting his hair pulled during sex. But one time Yuuri pulled a bit too hard and accidentally yanked some of Viktor’s hair out. It was only a few strands and didn’t actually hurt that much but they then had to stop because Yuuri needed to comfort an inconsolable Viktor over the fact that he thought that he was losing his hair.

2) At the start of their relationship Viktor did a lot of the dirty talk which they’re both really into. But he was really keen for Yuuri to try it too. But Yuuri wasn’t that confident at the beginning and he could never think about what to say and felt really awkward so he was never confident enough to do it. So one day during sex Viktor suggested that Yuuri try dirty talking in Japanese to see if he felt more comfortable doing it that way (and because Viktor has a very badly hidden language kink). But Yuuri kind of panicked and just blurted out the first thing that came into his mind which was ‘I love katsudon’. Viktor didn’t speak fluent Japanese but he still recognised the word Katsudon and so they had to stop because he was laughing too hard to continue. He managed to convince Yuuri that it was actually pretty hilarious after a while of Yuuri being mortified and it became a private joke between them.

1) At one point Yuuri started to get a bit more open and comfortable with asking to try out new things with Viktor, who is ecstatic about it. One of the things he suggested was trying out handcuffs but he got really embarrassed and just bought the first cheap pair that he could find. Everything went fine until after they were finished when it turned out that the locking mechanism had jammed which meant that neither the key nor the emergency switch worked. So Viktor was stuck handcuffed to the bed and they were both way too embarrassed to call anyone for help. They eventually managed to get them off and laughed about it once it was over. Later Viktor bought Yuuri some high quality handcuffs as a present and made him promise never to use cheap sex toys again.

Ink and Kisses

Anon said to moi:

“Omg i want a tattoo artist jungkook!!!!!! 😭😩 smut/fluff/and honestly anything!!!! I just love tattoos artists jungkook but there aren’t alot of those fanfic…. can u help a poor girl out ??💖”

FIRst time trying a Tattoo artist AU. I had to do some reading before this, and JK is sO sexy i s2g. Still weird that I don’t really ever feel like doing the do with him. HOPE YOU ENJOY <3 1,400 Words

Pairing: Jeon Jungkook x Reader

Genre: Fluff, Tattooist au!

Part 1 | Part 2 (FINAL)

Originally posted by nnochu

No one would have ever imagined that hardcore badass Jeon Jungkook, the most well-known tattoo artist in the town, the guy who dropped out to follow his passion, was best friends with beautiful, sweet, top-scoring university student, Y/N. 

Physically, they seemed to be polar opposites. He had dragons inked onto his skin, three piercings on his left ear and two on his right, and always wore black; whilst you were a bright, clean slate – but you knew that was what he loved about you.

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ink-stained skin // reggie mantle soulmate au

Ink-stained Skin

Words: 1.3k

Summary: Reggie attempts to contact his soulmate through words written on his skin. (Y/N) attempts to push her soulmate away.

masterlist

(Y/N) sighed as the writing appeared on her skin. It had read:

‘I got football captain!‘ 

with a smiley face drawn at the end. Pushing herself up from her seat, she made her way towards the bathroom in hope of getting rid of the ink incorporated into her skin. It had been the third time in a week that her soulmate had written to her and it had been the third time in a week she had ignored the words he wrote.

She didn’t want to push him away but she also didn’t want to be with Reggie Mantle, the guy, who on most days had an iQ lower than her six year old cousin. Sure, he was built like a God and sure, he had enough sporting ability to make up for the lack of hers but she couldn’t be with him. Of course, she couldn’t be with him, not when they spent ever waking moment disagreeing over the simplest things. She knew it was him, however she tried her hardest to hide her identity from him.

He had tried to figure out who the person he was destined to be with ever since he realised that they existed.

He was eight when he first realised that his soulmate existed. Unlike the rest of his friends, he didn’t have a name etched into his skin, neither did he have a countdown on the wrist of his prominent arm. To Reggie, there was no sign of him having a soulmate. Until the very day, he saw a messy sketch of what seemed to be a rose appear on his right forearm during math class. He gazed around the room, wondering if it was anyone he already knew. Every year since, on the exact date, a rose appeared on his right forearm.

The sign of his soulmate’s existence that caused him to reach out to them occurred when he was thirteen. He felt a pain in his ankle that caused him to drop to the ground in the midst of a soccer game, clutching it in hopes it would stop the pain.

Later that evening, he picked up the purple sharpie that sat atop of his wooden desk and pressed it against his skin, doodling a frowning face, following it with the words:

‘I hope u r okay.’

He sat waiting for a response from his soulmate, shaking his leg impatiently. He sat waiting for a response; after an hour of waiting, he attempted to contact her again, etching the words:

‘ur probably asleep, i hope u get well soon’ 

and followed it with a doodle of himself.

She stared at his writing, only just noticing how messy it was. Analysing it closely, she realised it was his writing. It was Reggie Mantle’s writing. She recognised it from anywhere. Who wouldn’t recognise their lab partner’s writing?

It had been two weeks since Reggie had wrote to (Y/N) informing him of his new title as the captain of the Riverdale bulldogs.

She felt upset but she didn’t know why. She wasn’t that into Reggie. Looking down at her arm, she noticed a drawing of a sad face followed with the words:

‘silent treatment?’

She let out a small laugh at the words, deciding it would be an appropriate time to reply. After eight years of ignoring him, she finally replied to his words.

'never’

She sighed, maybe she had judged Reggie before even giving him a chance. “Oh god, what’s gotten you in this state? Is it Mantle?” Kevin spoke, earning his best friend’s attention. “So when are you going to fuck him?”

(Y/N) spun around in her chair and dragged herself toward him and smacked his arm. “I hate you.”

“Does he even know his infamous soulmate is you?”

“No and he’s not going to find out until we graduate!”

(Y/N) was about to join Kevin on her bed, when she felt a tickling sensation on her left forearm. She smiled at his response, his words making him seem like an excited child during Christmas.

Reggie looked down at his arm, smiling to himself. She had finally written back. “Dude, she wrote back.” he grinned “Andrews, she finally wrote back!”

“I’m happy for you, cap but coach wants us on the field.”

He spent all of practise counting down the minutes until he could reply to his soulmate. He was unsure whether his soulmate was a female or a male but it never really mattered to him.

After showering, he picked up a pen only to notice that his soulmate had drawn a small rabbit on her left wrist. For most of the eight years he knew of his soulmate’s existence, he had always thought that they were left handed, as the drawing of the rose always seemed to appear on his right forearm. He took his place next to Archie, waiting for coach Clayton to enter the locker room with the information about their next game.

Archie looked over at his smitten captain, knowing that there was no way he would be paying attention to a word their Coach had said, too infatuated with the new drawing on his arm. “She actually wrote back. What is she doing?” he mumbled to himself, pulling his phone out from the back pockets of his jeans, wanting to text her.

Reggie was pulled out of his trance as he heard Archie’s mumbled words, his eyes widening slightly, Archie must’ve known who his soulmate was. “She? You know my soulmate!”

“Reggie, calm down, I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Reggie nudged Archie playfully “Tell me.”

“No.”

(Y/N) could barely react before Kevin snatched her phone off her and answered Archie’s incoming call. She let out a groan, knowing that it would be related to Reggie.

“You’re writing back to Reggie? (Y/N), that’s a disaster waiting to happen.” Archie exclaimed as soon as she answered, causing Kevin to laugh. “You’ll never be able to hide your identity from him until graduation if you continue replying.”

“My god, Andrews, you sound like you’re in the midst of a mental breakdown.” Kevin scoffed “Plus, she’s only just started drooling over Mantle.”

“I’m coming over! I’m bringing food!”

Reggie sat in his car waiting for Moose to get back with their food. Looking at himself in the rear-view mirror, he noticed a bruise had formed on his bicep. Instantly, he picked up a pen and wrote to her, drawing a winking face

'how did u get ur bruise? hope you haven’t been fighting’

Within a few seconds, his soulmate had already responded.

'SORRY!!!! the door handle was a lot higher than i expected. hope you didn’t feel it.’

Reggie let out a small laugh, not even realising that Moose had joined him in the car.

“Dude, you’re whipped and you don’t even know who this person is. What if it’s some old dude who’s kidnapped your soulmate and is trying to lure you to his house?” Moose groaned. “You did order a steak burrito right?”

A new semester meant new classes, new activities. (Y/N) slumped into her seat during home room, Kevin to her right and Reggie sat behind him. He glanced up from his desk, only to be met with Kevin, whose head instantly shot back to face his best friend.

“Got a problem, Keller?” He spoke, earning a scoff from (Y/N) “You too, (L/N)?”

“Don’t inflate your ego any further there, Reginald. It might burst.” (Y/N) responded, turning back to face the front, not wanting to speak to him any further.

(Y/N) then realised the reason why she had been so hesitant to reveal who she was to him. It was because he was one of the most egotistical people she knew and the person she spoke to through her ink-stained skin was nothing like the person she knew.

As soon as the bell rang, (Y/N) pushed herself out in attempt to beat the crowd that would be gathering in front of her locker. As she rushed, she failed to weave through the desk, hitting her hip on the corner. She let out a groan, clutching her hip instantly.

Reggie felt the pain grow in his hip as he watched (Y/N) try to groan and walk the pain out. His eyes widening and a gasp falling from his lips.

“It’s you. You’re my soulmate.”

Dear Strange Man on the Train,

At 11 o’clock at night, you moved across the train car to sit far too close to two girls about half your age so you could interrupt our conversation to tell us how pretty we are. We said thank you, have a good night, and went back to our conversation.

You interrupted us a second time to say that you didn’t want to bother us, but we needed to hear it, how pretty we are. We said cool, thanks, have a good night, and went back to our conversation.

You interrupted us a third time to say you wouldn’t say anything else, you didn’t want to bother us, you just had to let us know. We said have a good night, and went back to our conversation.

This seemed to perplex you. You came all that way across a train car to bestow upon us this life altering knowledge - the fact we were pretty - and all you got was a polite thank you? You grumbled about gratitude, about how you better not end up on facebook, were we putting you on facebook? Why was my friend looking at her phone? Was she putting you on facebook? All you’d done was tell us we were pretty.

At this point, my friend says, “Sir, we’re trying to have a conversation. Please don’t be disrespectful.”

This was when you got angry. Disrespectful? YOU? For taking the time out of your day to tell us we were pretty? Did we know we were pretty?

“Yes, we knew,” says my friend.

Well, that was the last straw. How dare we know we were pretty! Sure, you were allowed to tell us we were pretty, but we weren’t allowed to think it independently, without your permission! And if we had somehow already known - perhaps some other strange man had informed us earlier in the day - we certainly weren’t allowed to SAY it! Where did we get off, having confidence in ourselves? You wanted us to know we were pretty, sure, but only as a reward for good behavior. We were pretty when you gifted it upon us with your words, and not a moment before! You raged for a minute about how horrible we were for saying we thought we were pretty, how awful we turned out to be.

I took a page out of your book and interrupted you. “Sir, you said you wouldn’t say anything else, and then you kept talking,” I said. “You complimented us, we said thank you, and we don’t owe you anything else. It’s late, you’re a stranger, and I don’t want to talk to you. We’ve tried to disengage multiple times but you keep bothering us.”

At this point, our train pulled into the next stop. My friend suggested we leave, so we got up and went to the door.

Seeing your last chance, you lashed out with the killing blow. “I was wrong!” you shouted at us as we left, “You’re ugly! You’re both REALLY UGLY!”

Fortunately, since our worth as human beings is in no way dependent upon how physically attractive you find us, my friend and I were unharmed and continued on with our night. She walked home; I switched to the next train car and sat down.

So, strange man, I know you’re confused. I don’t know if you’ll think about anything I said to you, but I hope you do learn this: when you give someone something - a gift, a compliment, whatever - with stringent stipulations about how they respond to it, you are not giving anything. You are setting a trap. It is not as nice as you think it is.

But you’ll be happy to know that when I sat down in the next car, a strange man several seats over called, “Hey, pretty girl. Nice guitar. How was your concert?”

“Thanks. Good,” I said, then looked away and put on my headphones, the universal sign for ‘I’d like to be left alone.’

“Wow. Fine. Whatever. Fucking bitch,” he said.

Apparently people are talking saying how disappointing Kaneki was this chapter, talking about how the power difference doesn’t make sense and all that. But you all forget Mutsuki used the biggest weapon there is against him.

Mutsuki completely disarmed him by playing on his heart. Kaneki still loves the quinx despite making the decision to leave them. And seeing one of them upset and sad was heart breaking for him. Especialy since he hasn’t fully worked through what his time as Haise meant.

And especially knowing how it felt to lose a parent figure, which is what he tried to be for them.

It was a sudden affront to. He was basically slammed with the people he loves and regrets leaving behind on the human side, something emotionally I doubt he’s really worked through yet.

Even when Mutsuki attacked him, it took him a minute to figure out the Mutsuki wasn’t just like… lashing out at him for leaving but actually only came to capture him and be then he’d already administered many hits of RC suppressants and was considerably weakened… And even then he still didn’t want to hurt Mutsuki because he still cares.

It was a dirty trick. But you all don’t seem to get Mutsuki to some extent seemed to know exactly what he was doing. He spent so much time with him, he knew how much Haise seemed to care about people, and he used it against him.

Mutsuki’s not a moron he knows full well he couldn’t beat Haise/Kaneki fighting straight up. We all know it.

Supercut

Summary:

Marinette loves her friends and Adrien can’t deal. Post-reveal, pre-relationship.

Also on AO3 and FF.net


Marinette Dupain-Cheng loved with a fierce sort of affection that gently destroyed him.

She wasn’t grand gestures or loud declarations or flashy devotion.

She was thoughtful moments and quiet attention and unwavering loyalty.

It took Adrien an embarrassingly long time to recognize it for what it was.  When everything he knew was detachment and afterthought his compass for affection was nearly non-existent.  He knew Nathalie’s cold comfort and his father’s broken promises and Chloe’s noisy fawning. He knew conditions and strings and if-thens.

He didn’t understand second chances.

Striving. Everyone in his life was striving.

They put their careers, their hopes, their reputation on his shoulders and poked and prodded and pulled until he smiled just right and spoke just so and moved just there.

And he didn’t know any different.

Until he did.

She loved in the little ways.

She loved in passing moments and quiet gestures and thoughtfully in a way that was almost careless.  In a way that was so very Marinette.

Adrien had always been careful, but in the five weeks since he found out the Truth he felt like his shoes were made of glass and every next step could be the one to shatter him.

A problem when every shy smile, confused blush, and rapid fluttering of blue, blue eyes made him feel like dancing, glass be damned.

Marinette was Ladybug.

In removing the mask he had been gifted with the knowledge that his best friend was never really as far away as she seemed.  Ladybug was untouchable.  Marinette was so very, very there.

It somehow made everything more vivid, more terrifying,

just more.

It had been painfully awkward of course. Because of course it was when she was so adamant about keeping their identities a secret.

Fortunately for him, Marinette never was good at telling the restrooms apart.

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The Towel Story

Originally posted by awwsehun

Member: Exo Sehun

Type: Fluff/Smut

“The only way I will ever sit in his car is if I’m using it to run him over,” you snapped, pushing Kyungsoo’s hand off your shoulder and picking up your suitcase, wincing at the weight before starting down the stairs. Maybe you had over packed, but you didn’t want to risk running out of clothes, especially in a place so secluded.

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Lance keeps a very in depth journal of his thoughts and feelings. It includes dates, ages, times, and sometimes context snippets to help him remember. He does this in hopes that all his insecurities get transferred from himself to his little leather bound book. It usually only works for a few minutes before he just gets washed over with his feelings again. At home, he’d gradually stopped using it after he’d been getting promoted in the garrison, but he still took it everywhere he went. He’s realized that soon after becoming a paladin, he started writing in it again. He didn’t realize how bad it became until he wet from once every few days, to every day, to multiple times for the day. 

He writes in it after a particular hard day with Voltron, but Pidge finds him writing in it while alone int he training room and makes fun of him for keeping a diary. Lance feels embarrassed, so he quits it cold turkey. Soon he’s itching to write in it ll the time but stops himself. He stays up all night more often, paces his room more often, works alone in the training room. He’s health starts to deteriorate and no one really notices. Hunk asks a few ‘are you okay’s?’, but lance just pastes on a fake smile and sends him on his way. The stress of not writing and getting his feelings down on paper ends up affecting him on a mission and he gets badly hurt trying to protect the other paladins.

He wants to recover on his own, much against Coran’s and Allura’s wishes. He barely makes it to his room and passes out. Shiro and Keith come to makes sure he’s okay because Shiro’s the leader and Keith feels bad for snapping at Lance pre mission. They find him knocked out. Lance’s journal is open on the headboard. Shiro looks it over and Keith just thinks it’s dumb scribbles. The words are scratched along the 2 pages in circles, ovals and spirals. The pencil is almost down to nothing. Shiro an only make out a few words here and there. ‘I’, ‘help’, ‘can’t’, ‘worthless’, and ‘weak’ make the most appearances. 

Shiro closes the book and flips it in his hands. There’s no title. The leather is worn and the pages are old. Keith takes it from him and opens it. He flips a few pages scanning it. Shiro tries to take it back. He reasons that it’s Lance’s property, but Keith reasons that it was left open. Keith stops fighting against Shiro and looks at him with wide eyes. He hands the book over and Shiro glances over the page in confusion. He flips that page back then forward. Pages and pages of Lance’s writing. It looked much different to the page that was left open. Very elegant and slow strokes across the papers of a book filled with words that Shiro cursed himself for not realizing sooner. 

Lance had felt inferior to them, like he didn’t belong. He’d been feeling that way for weeks because of how they treated him. How they joked about him. How they pushed him off to the side for their own missions. He knew Keith was feeling the same way. They had been unconsciously pushing him away lately. Shiro had been noticing that Lance spent more time alone with the Blue Lion instead of having meals with them or training with them. 

“Sh-shiro, I- How did we not see this?” Keith hisses, guilt dripping from his words. 

“Lance, obviously has had experience with putting on an act. We’ll help him. We’ll all help him. We have to.” 

Commission for @inarelashionshipwithmyself


Lance had been cranky the last few weeks. On it’s own that wasn’t too unusual, Lance got cranky about the weirdest things.
About running out of the good face masks and having to use different ones that Allura gave him. About the mice not being in the mood to play with him when he wanted. About getting too little sleep. About getting too much sleep. About an alien he’d never seen before and never would again rejecting his embarrassing advances.
But usually his mood brightened again as quickly as it had soured and this lasting slump was starting to worry them.

Keith wasn’t the first who’d noticed it, he hardly ever was when it came to these things. But after Hunk had addressed Lance’s recent attitude and he’d started to pay attention, the signs couldn’t be ignored anymore.
Usually Lance chattered endlessly during their meals and meetings, now he hardly ever said a word, leaving the group as soon as he could where he’d despised being alone for long periods before.
He seemed tense during training sessions, focused but way too stubborn to really make anything out of it, the slightest mistake throwing him off for the whole day. Keith had caught him more than once on the training deck, using it late into the night, expression hardened and determined.

Whenever Hunk or Shiro or, lately, even Allura tried to talk to him he’d put on a cheery mask and pretend everything was fine before retreating to the shooting range to utterly destroy every target the ship gave him.
Keith didn’t know what to do, didn’t know how to reach Lance if not even their most empathetic team members could. He hadn’t felt this helpless since he heard the reports about the Kerberos mission failing.
Until the afternoon he was paired up with Lance for hand to hand combat training.

“That’s – okay, that’s enough”, Lance spat, squirming helplessly where Keith had him pinned, one hand tapping a fluttery rhythm against the floor. “I yield! Fuck, I yield!”
Keith furrowed his brows, not used to the other boy giving in this easily, but he still stepped back, offering Lance a hand to help him get up.
Lance scoffed and slapped the hand away, pushing himself upright. Frown deepening Keith watched him.

“You okay?”, he asked, wiping sweat from his forehead. They’d been sparring for a while already. Where Lance had been almost tenacious in the beginning the fire in his eyes had subsided with every failed try to overpower Keith, every time it was him tapping the mat instead.
Now he leveled Keith with an icy glare but instead of getting back into stance he turned away.
“Leave me alone”, he mumbled before he left the training deck.

Shiro perked up from where he was pinning Hunk against the floor, the yellow paladin about to twist free from the hold and counter it when he also noticed Lance’s retreat.
Allura stepped forward, hands on her hips as she called after him: “Lance! Lance, we’re not done, where do you think you’re…”
“It’s okay!”, Hunk called, having used the distraction to free himself and scramble to his feet. “It’s okay, I’ll go get him!”

“No”, Keith said, body moving before he could even think about it. “I’ll go, I’ll talk to him…” He could feel their eyes on him, skeptical and unsure. Could hear the breath Hunk took, the careful “Um, Keith buddy…”
But he just shook his head, going for the doors.
“I got this.”

As expected he found Lance in his room, already changed halfway out of his armor, the leg pieces still clinging to his body.
“I told you to leave me alone”, Lance mumbled, no emotion to be heard in his voice, but Keith still stepped further into the room, arms crossed and face determined.
“Yeah”, he answered, taking a look at the helmet and armor pieces Lance had put on the table for now. “But I wanna know what your deal is. You’ve been … weird.”
Lance huffed a dry laugh and shook his head.
“I’ve been…? No. Nothing. No deal, everything’s just … peachy.”

“Bullshit.” Keith shook his head. “You can tell Hunk and Shiro that. Because they want to … respect your privacy or whatever. But something’s wrong. I wanna know what.”
Lance groaned, throwing another armor piece onto the table.
“What, so you can feel even better about yourself? Just go away!”
Keith huffed and leaned a hip against the desk, trying to catch Lance’s gaze but the blue paladin already turned away from him again.

“Listen”, he began, not quite sure where this would lead but just going with it for now. “Just because you can’t beat me at hand to hand doesn’t mean…”
“Hand to hand? What can I beat you at then?”, Lance spat, whirling around to finally meet Keith’s gaze and there it was again, that fire he’d seen at the beginning of the training session. “You’re the amazing pilot, the martial arts expert, the brave one everybody loves and wants to be like! What else is there, what else … what else can I contribute?”
Keith frowned.

“You … you want to be like me?”
“Oh piss off!”, Lance cursed, turning away again with an exasperated huff. Slowly but surely Keith began to suspect he really wasn’t the right one for this job, that he was only making worse. Maybe he should retreat and send one of the others instead, to settle what he’d done wrong.
“I’m … I’m not good at this”, he began, already setting up to excuse himself when he had an idea. “At uh … talking to people. When they’re upset.”
“Oh really…” Lance’s voice was dripping with sarcasm but Keith pressed on.

“Or just in general. I just can’t seem to … connect with others. I’m not good at that. You are.”
Even though Lance’s back was turned to him Keith could see how he froze, head tilted a little. Listening. He took his chance and went on.
“Remember when we were on that desert planet and neither Pidge nor me could convince the aliens to let us evacuate them? But then you came in and only needed two minutes with their leader to make them trust us?”

Lance shook his head.
“You were still wearing your helmets, that was rude to them.”
“Yeah but we didn’t know! We never would have figured that out if you hadn’t!” Keith took a careful step forward, around Lance, to look at him again. Some of the tension had seeped out of the other boy’s shoulders and his expression wasn’t quite as hardened as before.
“Yeah”, Lance mumbled. “You guys would’ve been lost without me.”
“We would have been!”, Keith insisted, still not sure what he was doing, only that it seemed to work at least a little.

“And … and that’s not the only thing! You’re … you’re a great shot. An incredible shot! There’s a reason your bayard is a rifle and mine is for close combat. You’re our long range guy, yeah? You don’t have to beat me at hand to hand when you can beat me in a shooting competition any day. And your bond with your lion…”
That was apparently the wrong thing to say. Lance rolled his eyes and shook his head.
“Yours is better. The things Red does for you, it’s crazy…”

“Oh god!”, Keith groaned, throwing his arms out. “Stop comparing yourself to me! You’re your own person! And you bring your own skills to the team! We all need you and if you can’t see how much Blue adores you, you’re an even bigger idiot than I thought!”
There was a pause, Lance squinting at him as if deciding to trust him or not. Keith stubbornly held the gaze.

“You mean that, don’t you?”, Lance asked after a while, expression shifting from suspicious to thoughtful. He sucked his lower lip into his mouth, biting down on it.
“In case you haven’t noticed”, Keith said, posture relaxing again. “I’m also a really bad liar.”
Lance huffed another dry laugh at that but the creases around his eyes vanished as he relaxed.
“You really are”, he smiled tentatively and Keith couldn’t even bring himself to be mad at him. Not when he just coaxed a smile out of Lance. The first one in weeks.

Then Lance reached out to take his hand, squeezing it tightly, and Keith was way too surprised to react. The grip around his fingers was strong and warm, oddly pleasant.
“Come with me”, Lance said, tugging him towards the door without a care in the world for his half dismantled armor.
“What … where…”
“Shooting range”, Lance answered, completely nonchalant with a little shrug. “Wanna beat your ass at something right now.”
Keith snorted but let himself be dragged away. If that’s all it took to make Lance smile again he’d lose a hundred shooting competitions against him.


[This fanfic was a commission! Check out how to commission me or consider buying me a Coffee if you liked this story!]

My Love’s So Strong

Pairing/Characters: Bucky Barnes x Reader, Dad!Tony
Warnings: stalker behaviour, kidnapping, attempted sexual assault, angst, fluff
Summary: You’re a very valuable team member of The Avengers and that means you have fans. Some fans just don’t know their boundaries.
Word Count: 2.5k+  
A/N: I deadass know nothing about Philly only that my mom’s real brother live’s there lmao

INSPIRED BY THESE TWO ASKS:

Originally posted by sebastiansource

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Homecoming- Part 2

Part 1

Music blared from her speakers as Y/N started to get ready for the dance. Singing along to the lyrics she walked into her closet, coming to a stop in front of her dresses. She still hadn’t decided what dress she was going to wear and she sighed in frustration as she looked through her walk in closet. One side of the closet was dedicated to dresses and she looked at them, trying to decide what color she wanted. Black? White? Turquoise? Red?

Her eyes landed on a pink and silver dress, hiding among the rest. She had brought this dress for last year’s homecoming but had changed her mind at the last minute. Pulling it off the rack, she held it out in front of her. The strapless dress was sparkly silver at the top with a light pink ribbon around the waist. The light pink material below the waist fell just above her knees. Smiling she held it against her body, standing in front of the mirror. It was perfect.

Placing it down on her bed, she returned to her closet to find her sparkle silver heels. Grabbing them from the shelf, she placed them next to her dress. It was the perfect outfit for the evening. She smiled as she imagined Peter’s reaction to seeing her in the dress.

She glanced over at the clock on her bed stand. 2:00pm. She had four hours until Ned would be at her house. The two of them planned to ride together, meeting Peter and Liz at the dance. Y/N was still not happy about Peter bringing Liz to the dance and to be perfectly honest she was more than happy to stay home and have a movie night by herself. The only problem was Ned. He kept bugging her about it so she finally caved and agreed to go with the three of them.

It had been almost a week since Peter had told Y/N that he was bringing Liz to homecoming. Since then she had hardly talked to him. She did her best to avoid seeing them because now Liz was with him almost all the time at school. At lunch, Y/N made up excuses about having to finish a project and ate lunch in the library. In the hallways, she did her best to go the long way to her classes because it meant she wouldn’t have to see them together. Sure, Peter and Liz were still only friends but it hurt Y/N to see them hanging out.

“Ow!” Y/N groaned, clutching her stomach from the sudden pain.

She slowed her breathing, taking in deep breaths as her stomach continued to hurt. Sitting down on her bed, she felt herself become nausea and continued to take deep breaths hoping the feeling would pass. When another sharp pain emitted from her stomach, she laid down, and closed her eyes, willing the pain to go away.

~~

“Y/N! Y/N! Wake up!”

Y/N opened her eyes to see Ned standing above her. She groaned as she rolled over onto her side, clutching her stomach.

“What time is it?” she asked.

“6:00! We were supposed to leave now,” Ned said. “Do you feel ok? You look pale.”

Y/N shook her head. “I feel awful.”

“But you have to feel better! You need to come to homecoming. Peter needs to realize that he needs to be with you and not her!”

“I-I don’t think I’m gonna go,” Y/N said, scrunching up her face in pain.

Ned’s face dropped but he nodded his head, understanding. “You’ll come if you feel better right?”

Y/N nodded. “Of course.”

He squeezed her hand before leaving the room. Y/N grabbed her phone from her nightstand to see three texts from Peter.

When are you and Ned getting to the dance?

Liz and I are on the way.

We’re here. Where are you?

The last message was from ten minutes ago but Y/N placed her phone next to her, ignoring the messages. He would find out soon enough that she wasn’t going to be there. Ned would probably be at the school any minute to tell him.

Her stomach felt a bit better, but she was still nausea. Turning on her tv, she put on Netflix resuming the last episode of the show she was currently watching. Luckily, it wasn’t anything that took a lot of brainpower and she laughed as the characters continued their crazy antics.

The next hour, Y/N drifted in and out of sleep, only getting up once to use the bathroom. Just as she was laying back down, the familiar sound of her window opening caught her ear. She glanced over to see Peter quietly climbing in, still in his tux from the dance, and land gracefully on the floor. He closed the window behind him before turning around to face her. She blushed, finding him quite attractive in his tux.

“H-hey,” he said, quietly.

“Peter! Hey! What are you doing here?” she asked, forgetting that she was trying to avoid him at the moment.

“Ned said you weren’t feeling good, so I thought I would make sure you were ok.”

“I’m fine. You didn’t have to come and leave Liz all by herself,” she said, laying down.

“But I wanted to,” Peter replied, confusion in his voice.

“Well now you see I’m fine you can go back.”

“Well I…I was thinking maybe I could stay over and we could watch a movie or something.”

“You would rather stay with me than be with Liz at the dance?”

Peter nodded, running his fingers through his brown hair. “Yea. I like her and all but I would rather hang out with you any day.”

Y/N laughed. “Even when I’m sick?”

“Even when you’re sick.”

Peter walked over to her dresser and opened the top drawer. “Please tell me my sweatpants are still in here? This tux is uncomfortable.”

“You have a pair of shorts in there….”

Peter turned around. “Y/N, where are my sweatpants?” His eyes widened as he took in her appearance. “Are wearing them and one of my t shirts?”

“They’re comfortable!” she said, holding her hands up in defense.

“I know,” Peter said, laughing. He grabbed the pair of yellow gym shorts from her drawer and one of his many t shirts that had accumulated in her drawer. “How do you have so many of my shirts?”

“I always forget to give them back to you,” she said, referring to when she would stay at his place and want to wear a comfortable shirt instead of one of her’s.

Peter smiled, walking into her bathroom and closing the door behind him. When he reemerged his tux was no where to be seen. He had on his yellow gym shorts with a blue Midway t shirt. Y/N blushed as she looked at him, finding him more attractive than when he was in his tux.

He layed down next to her, both of them rolling onto their sides to face each other.

“So how was the dance?” she asked.

“It was…ok,” he said. “It would have been better if you were there.”

Y/N smiled. “Was Ned having fun?”

“Yea. He was actually dancing with Michelle when I left.”

Y/N laughed as Peter’s hand moved to hers and intertwined with her fingers with his. They had held hands before but this time there was something different about it. Y/N’s heart beat faster and she was sure Peter could hear it with his superhuman senses however he was nice enough not to say anything.

As the two of them laid on Y/N’s bed watching a movie, they found themselves becoming tangled up. Y/N’s head was resting against Peter’s chest, while his hand was placed on her stomach. Throughout the movie, Y/N continued to doze off but each time she woke up, Peter was still there, his eyes glued to the television screen.

The next time she woke up, the sun was streaming through her windows. Her head was still on Peter’s chest and she could feel the rise and fall of his chest as he slept. Her stomach was feeling slightly better as she stood up to use the bathroom.

When she returned, Peter had woken up, his brown hair messy, as he looked over at her.

“Good Morning,” she said, leaning against the frame of the bathroom door.

“Morning.”

He stood up and walked over to her, wrapping his arms around her and pulling her into a hug.

“I had fun last night. Thanks for letting me stay.”

“I’m glad you came.”

They took a step back from each other and Y/N watched as Peter walked over to the window, opening it quietly.

“Going to save the world?” she asked.

Peter nodded. “I’ll come by later and we can hang out again.”

“Sounds like a plan, Spiderman.”

~~

Y/N sat at her desk, finishing her math homework that was due tomorrow. She was having a hard time focusing as her mind kept replaying everything that had happened last night with Peter.

“Y/N,” Peter said from behind her.

She turned around to see Peter closing the window. He was still dressed in his red and blue Spiderman suit and he pulled the mask off, tossing it to the floor.

“Save a lot of people today?” she asked, giving him a hug.

“Stopped a bike thief, gave an old lady directions. I’d say it was good day,” he said, smiling.

She laughed pulling away from him. As she took a step away his gloved fingers locked with hers. Before she could do anything his lips were pressed against hers. She smiled as he moved his head away, his brown eyes locked on hers.

“I-I forgot to do that earlier,” he said, an embarrassed smile on his face.

Standing on her tip toes, she pressed her lips against his. “It’s ok,” she replied, knowing that he had finally realized how he felt about her.


Authors Note: You guys are awesome! Thank you so much for the positive feedback. I plan on doing one more part to conclude this story. ❤️ Lexi

@slythergirlimagines @eabha-no @thedumbestravenclaw

Why the Disney guys are great

ERIC: He loves his dog. He plays the flute really well and that’s hard to do. Really gentle and sweet. When he found Ariel on the beach he took her home and took care of her. Great smile. Is a chill guy but will also not hesitate to stab and kill an evil sea witch with his boat.

PHILIP: Hears a pretty sound and follows it. Great singing voice. Never realizes that the girl he fell in love with is the princess he’s supposed to marry. Falls so in love that the first thing he does is go to his father and tell him. Has that goofy little hat with a feather. Fought a motherfucking dragon on a cliff.

NAVEEN: Immediately takes off his royal suit into a civilians outfit and disappears playing ukulele. Even though he’s turned into a frog he’s still oozing confidence. Can only mince food, doesn’t know how to do anything else. Made a ring out of scrap even though they’re frogs. Is willing to give everything up as long as Tiana gets her restaurant. Has that nice curl that falls onto his forehead. Unplaceable yet charming accent.

HERCULES: His strength too big for his goddamn body. Goes from zero to a hundred real quick. Even though he can deck a monster in a minute flat he has no idea how to talk to girls. Socially awkward. Good with kids. Can do a push-up on one finger. When told to use his head he took it literally. Punched his uncle, the god of the underworld, in the face.

FLYNN RIDER: Sarcasm galore. The Smolder. Drop dead gorgeous looks. Doesn’t mind that he’s on a wanted poster but does mind that they can’t get his nose right. Is the only one who sees it’s weird to randomly start singing. Can’t fight for shit, barley manages to make do with a frying pan. Has the most ridiculous birth name in Disney history. Got stabbed in the gut but cut Rapunzel’s hair to save her, not at all caring about himself. First words after not dying aren’t “I love you” but “I have a thing for brunettes” because of corse they are.

ADAM: Swooshes his cape around in the shadows like some kind of wannabe batman. Is extra as fuck. Still acts like a child sometimes. Has had no social interaction for years but is trying his best. Gets easily confused. Doesn’t know what to do when he realizes he has feelings for people. Is too shy to tell Belle he loves her. Feels bad the second after he scares Belle away. Would literally rather die then live without the girl he loves. Has the most extra transformation back into a human while everyone else doesn’t.

MAUI: Gets scared easily. Amazing hair. That little face he makes when he can’t use his hook right. Was building a statue of himself in his cave like a dork. Magic tattoos. Can’t fish to save his life. Gave humans fire and wind and coconuts. That smirk he does, you know the one. Great sense of humor. Did everything he could think of to make humans happy so they would like him. Was a total puppy when he got his hook back and fixed.

FERDINAND: So fucking sweet and gentle. Has a name that tells us he doesn’t even need Snow White for animals to follow him around. Sings to Snow White when she’s on her balcony like a modern day Romeo. Knows when Snow White went missing because he kept visiting and goes to look for her right away. Is literally heartbroken when he finds her, thinking she’s dead and is overjoyed when she wakes up. A good boy, a soft boy. Literally has done zero things wrong in his entire life.

ALADDIN: Tricked the genie right off the bat. Jumped right in to help Jasmine with the guards. Steals food but ends up giving it to orphan children living in the street. Is the most selfless person in Agrabah. Quick thinker and can outsmart anyone. Is one of the only Disney princes who actually know how to sword fight. Has matching hats with his pet monkey.

LI SHANG: Sexuality crisis. “You fight good”. Turns a bunch of losers into warriors. Rarely ever wears a shirt for some reason. Tries out his new title of captain alone in his tent all exited like a little kid. Doesn’t give up, not once, on anything. Would literally die for Mulan. Fine as hell.

CHARMING: Gets bored at his own ball. Is a hopeless romantic. Doesn’t care for people who gush over him because he’s the prince, and in fact took interest in Cinderella because she was the only one not doing that. Jumped out a window for Cinderella. Is a super supportive husband. Went door to door looking for Cinderella, determined to find her no matter what. Good dancer.

FELIX: Doesn’t know how to be mean. Considers totally harmless words bad language. Ridiculously short. That video game sound when he jumps. Thinks that by saying Ralph’s catchphrase it will give him Ralph’s power to wreck stuff as well. Can speak qbertese. Dripping with southern farm boy charm. Is a shit dancer but that’s what makes it fun to watch. After accidentally triggering Calhoun he respects her making him leave and never uses the phrase again. Pulls Vanellope back from danger on the rainbow bridge and then makes sure she stays behind him. “Do you think they’ll stop there?” “YES!”


(( If I missed any that you want to see, just let me know & I’ll make a part 2! ))

anonymous asked:

FAFLAMFLMA COMBINE THESE 2: 📱🍆 - ur lube ♥

📱 → ❝I sent you a picture of my dick. Please respond.❞

🍆 → ❝Stop sending me eggplant emojis when I’m trying to study.❞


credit: x.

COUNT → 2.059

GENRE → smut

PAIRING → jungkook | reader

WARNINGS → graphic sex | light spanking | explicit language 


Your phone vibrated for the tenth time in the last sixty seconds. Frustrated, you brought your face out of your textbook and angrily pressed your thumb down on your home button, unlocking your phone to open your messaging app.

JUNGKOOK [11:02:53]: I sent you a picture of my dick. Please respond.

You had already opened it and looked at his dick at least two times now, but you had a big test tomorrow and really couldn’t waste precious time studying thinking about how you wanted Jungkook to come over and use that dick.

Again, you left him on read.

Jungkook knew where you lived and he had been at your dorm more times than you cared to admit, but some part of you was hopeful he would leave you alone. Then again, his ego was so fragile, especially when it came to his dick.

Your phone vibrated again and you looked at your notifications to see Jungkook was just sending you the eggplant emoji over and over again until you replied.

YOU [11:04:10]: Stop sending me eggplant emojis when I’m trying to study.

You let out a groan and turned your phone to silent so that the notifications wouldn’t distract you anymore. Looking to your computer screen at the syllabus, you flipped to the page in your book indicated by the study guide.

“A morpheme is…” you began to read aloud to yourself, but you were still distracted. Your eyes darted to your phone not even making a sound. It was almost more distracting when you knew someone was trying to talk to you. Shaking your head, you tried to focus. “A morpheme is used when…”

You slammed your textbook closed, irritated because he’d broken your focus. With a defeated sigh, you looked at your phone and your eyes nearly bulged out of their sockets at the last text you got from Jungkook.

JUNGKOOK [11:07:35]: You’re in so much trouble. Take off your pants.

Swallowing, you stood up from your desk, looking over at the door anxiously. He sent that text two minutes ago and you knew it only took him five to get to your dorm’s parking lot by car. You only had five minutes to prepare yourself.

And you knew he didn’t appreciate you ignoring his texts.

Keep reading

nude wars — preview

pt1 | pt2 preview

pairings: yoongi x reader x jungkook

genre: smut, touches of fluff / frat!yoonkook

description: Okay sure, maybe having a threesome with two best friends from the same frat wasn’t the smartest thing you’d ever done. But hey, when the result was them vying for your attention in the form of scandalous snaps, breathy audio messages, and unspeakable texts, well then the decision definitely wasn’t that bad.

— Or alternatively, your phone getting caught in the middle of Yoongi and Jungkook constantly trying to one-up each other in a war of sexting (and just maybe romantics).

note: so I know pt2 was supposed to come out today, but I’ve been sick for the past week and a half and I actually ended up having to go to the hospital yesterday bc I guess I wasn’t taking it seriously enough. but yeah, I thought I could at least post a tiny snippet ;;


It took all of five minutes into your shift for the post-sexting depression to kick in. The only word you could use to describe today’s atmosphere at work being completely dead. There were barely any customers to keep you occupied, leaving you to watch the time tick by as your only form of entertainment, second by unbearably miserable second burying you deeper into a realm of inescapable boredom.

And this continued on… For five miserable hours, until you finally managed to gain some relief. Your good friend and co-worker, Jimin, finally coming in to start his shift.

“Someone looks like they had a long night. Let me guess, another late night on greek row?” He snickered, making his way behind the counter to join you.

“Haha, very funny, but… Yeah,” You ended up admitting, causing chuckles to fall from both of you.

Keep reading

Imagine running into Jensen while rushing to get on stage and him flirting with you.

“Five minutes! (Y/n) come on, we need you on stage now!” you heard a knocking on your door as you rolled your eyes. Five minutes and now weren’t the same, really.

“I’m coming! Just go, I’ll be there in one minute!” you huffed taking another look at your dress. No matter how much time passed you weren’t going to used to the nerves you had every time before going on stage to perform, especially when it was at some kind of awards.

You sighed and soothed down your dress once more. You took a deep breathed and stilled yourself “Alright, let’s do this. You’ve got this! You binge watched four seasons of Supernatural in a week, you can do anything!” you calmed down yourself before finally getting up and making your way to the door.

Seeing as you had only three minutes left you practically rushed out of the door and quickly made your way to the stage. Or at least would have made your way if you didn’t stumble on someone. A groan left their lips and you huffed as the both of you literally fell on the cold floor.

“Oh my gosh I’m so sorry!” you groaned, pushing yourself slightly up. But the moment you heard their chuckle your eyes snapped open and all air got caught in your lungs.

“Holy shit” you breathed out. Celebrity or not you were always going to be a fangirl when it came to this very man.

“Well, to be honest I always looked forward to the day I’d see you fall for me-” he gave you a big charming grin “-I never thought it was going to be this literally!” he chuckled and you blinked.

“Oh gosh, I am so so sorry Mr Ackles!” you huffed trying to get up from him although part of you didn’t really want it – who wouldn’t love such a close contact with Jensen Ackles?

“You know me?” he asked with a boyish smile and you nodded your head shyly.

“Who doesn’t?” you asked and he laughed “I just- I am super sorry for this. I am such a clumse sometimes!”

“It’s fine” he breathed out giving you a cute grin as he helped you up, his hand felt so soft holding yours.

“No really, Mr Ackles. I wasn’t watching and-”

“Seriously, (Y/n)-” he cut you off with a smile “I told you I am fine with that. It’s not every day your celebrity crush stumbles on you.” he chuckled “Oh and please, don’t call me Mr Ackles- makes me feel all old.” he laughed after making a face, but your fast beating heart prevented you from paying attention to anything after the celebrity crush part.

“I- I- I didn’t even know you… knew me.” you mumbled, biting the inside of your cheek.

“Know you? Are you kidding me? I practically have seen all of your movies at least three times each- and don’t let me get started on how many times I have listened to your songs. Jared’s wanted to murder me a good amount of times because of that.” he laughed almost a little nervously, rubbing the back of his neck.

You couldn’t help a giggle. You knew you were acting like a teen in front of her crush but it was partially true, right?

“You really have no idea how much that means to me.” you confessed “You- I admire your work so much it just is-impossible to believe. Every moment of your acting career from the beginning up to now with Supernatural has been such an inspiration for me. I- I wouldn’t be here if- if it wasn’t for you and what you do. I guess I owe you a big thank you, actually.”

“You-” he breathed out but shook his head “You don’t owe me anything honestly.” he laughed and you looked down in embarrassment.

“Honestly you have no idea how much I could tell you on that part.” you shook your head “It is so great to meet you Jensen, I’m sorry if I am being too much of a fangirl too.” you furrowed your eyebrows, giving him a nervous smile.

“Oh by all means, do go all fangirl on me. I wouldn’t mind it in the least bit! I am a real fanboy myself when it comes to you, Jared and Misha can sure as hell verify that!” he stuffed his hands in his suit’s pockets.

“Really?” you tucked a few strands of hair behind your ear “I never thought you- someone like you would even know my work- much less be such a fan.” you breathed out.

“Please, I could go on forever on how much I admire it. It honestly is a great pleasure to meet you (Y/n), even as this.” he laughed.

“I’m really sorry about that Jensen, I just am in a hurry. I got a performance and you know-”

“Oh trust me I know. I always am late myself, it’s fine. Say-” he licked his lips and even for a split second you got distracted “-How about you go and rock this performance as you always do-”

“I don’t really.” you mumbled and he gave you a stern look.

“Don’t fight me on this sweetheart. I have fought the devil twice, and I am just as stubborn as Dean is!” he pointed a finger and you giggled.

“So you go rock them and later we could meet here again to fangirl over each other as much as we want?” he laughed and you bit your lip.

“I would definitely love that”