and i worked in a hot warehouse all day

The Sweetest Thing (A Roman Reigns Story) - Part 1

Raising children is a lot tougher than it looks. And with two babies in the picture and one parent virtually out of it, things are twice as difficult. So how have Joe and Sasha coped? Or have they not? Mini-sequel to ‘Into The Deep End’ and 'Nothing Better’. Two-shot. Roman/OC.

Comments are greatly appreciated!

“Damn. You look crappy.”

Frowning at his smirking wife through the iPad screen, Joe rolled his grey eyes. “Our first FaceTime session in a while and you had to start with the negatives.” Huffing with annoyance, he picked up his bottle of water and chugged down half of it, then tossed it aside. “Glad to know you find my broken nose funny.”

Sasha sighed, fighting the urge to roll her own eyes. Ever since he lost the World title for the second time, her husband of over a year had become the crankiest motherfucker on the planet. The past week had been even rougher for him and she was only trying to lighten up the mood. However it was clear that he had little appreciation for her effort. Again. “I didn’t say it was funny,” she said.

Was he sure about that? From the way they’d been bickering lately, barbs and jibes seemed to be all they had for each other these days. “Right,” he murmured, sitting up straighter on his way-too-small hotel room bed. “So what’s up? How are the babies doing?”

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I don’t think I told this crow story. The other day I was riding home and  I saw this crow in the middle of the road with it’s head in one of those brow cardboard takeout boxes and when I got closer it moved out of the way I saw there was brown stuff all over its face. It was eating chocolate cake and it was all over it’s beak and I just laughed because it was just so happy to be sitting in the middle of the road eating chocolate cake!

Today I was riding and 2 blocks from the shop and 3 crows flew and followed me in some sort of formation like peanut lady escorts. I felt like a bad ass. It was a really lovely morning and I wish I could have just gone and rode my bike all day long, but I’m here in a hot warehouse working in the button mines.

here lemme shart out an update

I think i mentioned once briefly on here but a little over a week ago I was laid off from my job, the warehouse entirely got outsourced actually lmao but since then I immediately jumped on putting that extra work on commissions

hang on this is going into a readmore so u can all look at the treasure planet yaoi again:

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anonymous asked:

Thank you for filling my prompt, it was adorable! Just what I wanted. Also, yes I was thinking of those damn leather pants too, hahaha. More autumn prompts you say? How bout raking leaves as punishment for being risky on a mission/blowing shit up ("Merlin, we have landscapers for this shit." "They were fired.") So annoyance, frustration as the wind blows the leaves around, taking off of layers cuz they got hot, ultimately giving up and tackling each other into leave piles and snogging.

“Merlin, I’m pretty sure we got gardeners for this shit,” Eggsy groaned. “Posh places like this have fucking teams of gardeners. Seen it on Downton Abbey.”

“And they deserve a day off for doing excellent work without blowing up a warehouse,” Merlin replied, sounding bored. “Stop whinging or you’ll be out there all day.”

“Already been out here all day,” Eggsy muttered under his breath.

“I can hear you, lad. This could become a weekly exercise for you both.”

“What have I done? Today I mean?” Harry spoke up for the first time since he had asked if Merlin was truly serious about the two rakes he was holding when the tech wizard met them at HQ that morning.

A gust of wind blew by. While it was welcome on such an unseasonably hot day, it did blow off the top of the newly made leaf piles.

Eggsy took off his glasses and threw his head back, glaring at the sky. “Oh for fuck’s sake!” He wiped his bare forearm across his forehead and set about raking the wayward leaves back into place, back muscles making a most appealing view.

Harry gave in and removed not only his suit jacket, but his shirt as well. Since he’d been chosen as Arthur, he’d done far fewer missions and as of yet, none outside of the United Kingdom. Harry feared he was showing a rather pale complexion in comparison to Eggsy, who had been on a mission in California for the past month.

At least until Eggsy found out that the drug smugglers he’d just beaten the crap out of were also human smugglers and decided letting any surviving scumbags get arrested was too good for them.

Harry had been his handler, as such it was his responsibility to reign in his agent’s darker inclinations. But then Eggsy had turned to face the group of young people he’d released from the literal animal cages. Not a one could be old enough for university. One girl was clutching a doll that Harry recognized as being some Disney princess or other because he’d seen it’s twin in Daisy’s bedroom.

“Go ahead,” Harry said.

Eggsy ceased just playing with his lighter and got the victims to a safe distance before priming the gold grenade and tossing it in a perfect arc.

“Pretty,” Harry had commented as the building went up in flames, the smoke catching the beginnings of the sunrise.

Eggsy had laughed. Harry would gladly let a hundred warehouses full of criminals burn for the sound of that laughter.

Merlin knew that all too well. So after he reviewed the footage, he determined that both deserved equal blame for the incident coming to the attention of local news crews. “Highest level of discretion,” he’d muttered and glared daggers at Harry. “You used to know what that meant. You two are a couple; you can stop showing off for the lad any day now.”

“I’m afraid he’s trained it into me with positive reinforcement now,” Harry had said in a complete monotone. “I rather expect this incident has earned me a month of blowjobs.”

Eggsy had laughed so hard he almost fell out of his chair and it was entirely worth it when Merlin threw a laptop charger at Harry’s head. Neatly ducked, of course.

“How did you make him worse?” Merlin addressing Eggsy, still bent double and gasping for breath between outbursts. “How did you actually make Harry Hart more of a flash bastard than he already was?”

So Merlin had devised the punishment (“yes Eggsy, despite the fact he is in name my boss, I can punish Harry because if he fires me the coffeemaker will never work properly again and he wouldn’t risk a bunch of highly-trained agents all going through caffeine withdrawal at the same time”) leading to their present predicament.

A shrill whistle distracted Harry from the leaves he’d been mindlessly raking.

“Looking good,” Eggsy said, sidling over to his partner to admire him.

“Likewise,” Harry smiled and his eyes traced a drop of sweat as it made its way from Eggsy’s pectoral down to the darkened fabric at his waistband. Where his gaze lingered.

Merlin’s voice growled in Harry’s ear, “If I reprieve you morons, will you at least take this somewhere private?”

Harry tiled his head, considering the offer.

Eggsy, who could tell something was up but couldn’t hear, decided to take that moment to stretch his right leg behind his head with a wink.

“No, I don’t think so,” Harry said to Merlin before he tackled Eggsy into the giant leaf pile, ruining an afternoon’s work and unrepentant of the fact.

Harry vaguely registered Merlin’s voice telling him about all the nasty, unpleasant jobs he was assigning to them both immediately. He paid no mind and removed his glasses while Merlin was still ranting.

Eggsy was laughing between kisses and the leaves were falling gently around their heads

Entirely worth it.