and i will never get over this view either


I’ve been doing a lot of thinking about Howard Hargrave since the Redemption Season Finale. It broke my heart to have him turn out to be the villain. I know it was speculated within the fandom, but I didn’t want to believe it. I just wanted Tom to have a father that cares about him for him, not for how he can use him. One that was different than the man that raised him.

A couple of days later, I’m trying to take a step back from the emotional response I had to the episode’s end and look at what happened through the lens of the world it’s happening in and see if I can piece together something that makes sense that I might have missed.

Howard is a deeply manipulative man, which isn’t abnormal for this show and this world that we’ve watched the writers build for us. It’s funny, because I found myself angry at him for hiding his intentions from Tom because the gut emotional reaction was that if he did, that mean he didn’t love his son. I’ve been looking at it from a point of view that says he’s either like Bud or the opposite of Bud, and I think that’s wrong. He’s like Red.

Red has put Liz in countless dangerous positions over the course of 4 seasons. Some were intentional to get the job done and some just because his presence is an added danger to her life, but even when he sends her into some of the most volatile, dangerous situations or when he leaves her with half truths and manipulated answers, but I don’t question that he loves her. He did warn her that he would never tell her everything, but he also said that he would do whatever he felt like he needed to to keep her safe. I’ve had four seasons to watch Raymond Reddington struggle and be willing to die to keep Elizabeth Keen, a woman that he said he should have raised himself, safe. Regardless if Red is her biological father or someone who loves her as a father would, he always tries to protect her, and that’s a truth I accept in the Blacklist, but I’ve had four seasons to do so. 

We haven’t had that time with Howard. We’ve had eight episodes in which we never quite knew where he stood. Was he innocent or guilty? Sane or crazy? We’ve been questioning Howard since the moment he dragged Tom into this mess, and that left me with a negative impression of him at the end.

During one of my rewatches the scene gif’ed above jumped out at me. I believe Howard in it. I believe that he loved Scottie once and that, in a way, he might even love her now.

Scottie has mentioned, both on the main show and in Redemption, that there was a change in Howard. They haven’t slept together in five years (four when she made the statement about a year ago in S3), and something happened to heighten her anxiety three years earlier, which would also coincide with the year that the photo was taken that she used for Howard’s funeral. Scottie described her husband as brilliant and playful, charming and a terrible flirt. She loved him and he loved her. So what caused the change?

It could be a multitude of things. Secrets kept, secrets revealed, employers, goals, or anything really. It’s the Blacklist and these are two spies. What if it was something that made Howard question her at her core? What if Scottie is responsible in some much deeper way for Christopher’s disappearance? What if she’s been working for a third party and Howard feels that they’ll never successfully combat the threat without Whitehall’s prototype, but he doesn’t trust the board or anyone enough to reveal that? What if Howard is doing terrible things with a supposedly good goal in mind, and he’s approaching it as Tom has approached so much over the years: the ends justify the means?

Looking at him in comparison with Red instead of Bud helps even out how I feel about Howard and the possibilities that he’s not 100% evil. He could go to great lengths, manipulate everyone around him, use them, even abuse them to a degree, but still love his son. It doesn’t make it a healthy approach. It doesn’t mean that he hasn’t used him, but this is a very dark, very twisted world in which they live, and that tends to lend towards more extreme measures being used to reach goals.  Red described them as “people like us” to Scottie in S3, and I imagine that extends to Howard as well.

I would love other’s thoughts on this.

anonymous asked:

I don't like the 2Ct either, but if it was true. I really have the feeling that Lizzie wouldn't stop loving OurCiel. I would maybe even say she'd favour OCiel over the PastCiel, mainly because OCiel has been incredibly supportive of her, and never did anything hurt her. Besides the almost slap bc of the ring, and he openly apologised. I don't know other's views, but I don't get the feeling that Lizzie would just abandon OCiel, if PCiel came back, and maybe, if given the choice she'd chose OCiel.

Hey Anon :) Oh Gosh, I hope I won’t ramble too much but… well, lmao I might as well go all the way out since you launched the subject. Forgive me if that sounds rant-ish somehow. xD

Okay so, I spend probably a lot of time speaking about the 2CT more privately than publicly because it can be a little hard to vouch for my peculiar point of view about the 2CT to people who really like this theory (not that I blame them, I can be really annoying, @dorkshadows​ can confirm), because it’s not just about whether I like it or not.

First of all, do I like the 2CT? Like you, still not really for different reasons, but do I think it’s likely to happen? At this point yes, I do. 

However one thing that really tends to make me dislike this theory more than I usually would (since I generally shrug at theories I don’t like) is people making shortcuts about what the 2CT becoming canon would mean.

Basically, the 2CT is a private matter having importance for… 3 people out of the entire cast: 

  1. Ciel himself + it’s linked to his trauma and what happened with the cult
  2. Lizzie of course
  3. Tanaka maybe because he’s an important part of Ciel’s childhood (and maybe the rest of the Midfords)

So, in case it turns out to be confirmed in canon, people gotta stop thinking that there is going to be a giant sign glued to Ciel’s forehead saying “btw I stole my bro’s identity DO YOU BELIEVE WHAT AN AWFUL PERSON I AM?
And no, the whole London won’t throw rocks at Ciel, because it might be that the only two characters who will discover about what happened will be Lizzie and maybe Tanaka.

Heck, there is even a chance that we will never know Ciel’s “real name” in case the 2CT is canon, because as Ciel said it himself “if you believe in a lie for a long time it starts becoming the truth”, which is why “Ciel” is now his name as much as it was his brother’s until the twin died. 

Anyway, back to your question after this huge digression, another shortcut I really hate is people saying that (if I had to summarize roughly) “Lizzie loves the true Ciel and doesn’t give a damn about our!Ciel” because:

  1. No
  2. read the damn manga
  3. Still nope
  4. reread the Campania arc

First of all, “love” at ten and “love” at fourteen/fifteen aren’t the same thing + don’t you ever try and tell me that Lizzie didn’t love her other cousin (our!Ciel) even if she was engaged to real!Ciel.
She always was a kind and loving girl, so after the tragedy that happened 4 years ago she would have been happy at the idea of getting anyone of her family back, especially after believing they were all dead. 

But okay, the 2CT is a thing and our!Ciel made her believe he was his twin (her original fiancé) and it’s a big lie from his part… however 4 years passed since then, and even though it’s a lie that’s definitely going to hurt her, she’s not stupid and shallow to the point of forgetting about the 4 years she spent next to our!Ciel, trying to make him happy, supporting him and revealing to him what she really was about. 

In fact, I’d just like to remind anyone thinking that Lizzie would just discard our!Ciel for his twin at the first opportunity she has that her life before and after the tragedy 4 years ago also changed, because…

  • when Vincent and Rachel were still alive, she was a normal little girl, she went to the manor to play with her fiancé/her cousins, she didn’t have to worry about anything besides showing her strength
  • now whenever she visits it’s because she’s worried about Ciel feeling lonely or unhappy (ch14 is a good proof of that) and she wants to be by his side to support and protect him. 

So I know she didn’t suffer from Vincent’s and Rachel’s murders as much as Ciel did of course, but one thing people seem not to understand is that she also had to grow up because after Ciel came back she realized that to support him…

…She would also have to change (and she was 11 at the time). 

And finally about the campania arc, if the 2CT is true that means that…

…Real!Ciel is the one who triggered many years of self-loathing when our!Ciel…

…put an end to that by completely accepting her true self. 

TL;DR in the 2CT, Lizzie’s relationship to Real!Ciel (aka when she was a kid, before the tragedy of 4 years ago) doesn’t have much in common with the current relationship between Lizzie and our!Ciel because :

  • she’s older and she’s now one of the only sources of support that Ciel can get
  • she also had to change after the tragedy of 4 years ago in order to be by our!Ciel’s side, to support and protect him 
  • what happened on the Campania between them is extremely important to both their characterization 
  • what’s happening in the current arc will also probably turn out to be important for a few aspects of their relationship.

Obviously, were she to find out about all this, I’m not saying that Lizzie would immediately forgive our!Ciel for his lie, but her choosing Real!Ciel “because the one she always loved was her true fiancé” is beyond nonsense when Lizzie’s life (and feelings) now is different from her childhood. 

So to anyone dismissing all that happened between our!Ciel and Lizzie over the last 4 years under the pretense that she loves the real Ciel, well, way to make an annoying and useless shortcut because, if just when it comes to love, the human heart tends to go a little deeper than just names. 

Once again, I know it’s not something every 2CT supporter believe in (thank God), but still, it’s because of shortcuts like this that I find it quite tiring to discuss the 2CT and I just wish some people would consider the canon characterizations when they talk about the 2CT instead of inventing fanon characters and spreading confusing ideas like “Lizzie only loves the real Ciel anyway”. :/

Also, maybe now is a good time to say that personally I don’t think the real twin will come back, because as I was saying it’s a private matter that’s mostly important to Ciel and Lizzie only + because he died and his body most likely burnt…

..which is why (since Vincent also can’t be brought back apparently because his body also was burnt) I don’t think he’s Lord Sirius (+ UT having such a perfect timing when those kids were locked there for a month would kill the whole plot twist).

Sorry for all the rambling Anon, I hope it made sense somehow. ^^ Also as always that’s just my opinion and I’m not asking for anyone to agree with me. 

Have a nice weekend. :) 


“And that would be?” you asked, watching as all of the photographers screamed and ran towards the newly arrived guest. You stood beside your friend and colleague, Clark Kent who was also watching. He was taller and able to look over the others to get a view of the guest.

“I don’t know,” Clark replied, looking curiously at the man as he made his way closer to the both of you.  

“You must be new, that’s Bruce Wayne,” another voice sounded from behind you, making you freeze just as the view opened up and you were able to see Bruce, standing tall and proud, clad in a suit you had never seen before. As photographers parted to stand on either side of him you looked him over, staying silent until your eyes met his. The shock on his face was less evident than it must have been on your own. He did look down after you mouth opened slightly, as though you were going to say something but lost the courage as he walked by you and Clark, into the house. 

“Do you know him?” Clark asked, drawing your attention from the disappearing figure as he put a hand on your shoulder. 

“No, I guess I don’t,” you replied cryptically, making Clark begin to ask a question before you spoke up again, stopping him short, “Let’s head inside. Wouldn’t want to miss anything”

“I’m off to ask Luthor a few questions, don’t get lost,” Clark nodded off, noticing how empty your stare was as you looked across the room, your gaze fixed on the wall. Clark sighed before walking off, leaving you to stand alone for only a moment before you felt another presence behind you. You felt a shiver run down your spine, your muscles tensing. 

“It’s good to see you again Y/N,” his voice, god, deep and hoarse just like the last time you had heard it. Then you were more comfortable, in your own home, back when you were in his arms, when his arms felt like home. Now everything was different. You opened your mouth but no words came out as you felt you were suddenly so terribly out of place, longing to leave this place, find Clark and go home. While you thought, you kept yourself from answering, leading the man behind you to move so he stood in front of you, his eyes cast down as you stared at his tie. “Are you not going to say anything?” he asked, lowering his voice as he stepped closer to you. You took a deep breath before looking up to gaze at his eyes, only able to hold it for a moment before diverting your eyes to his jacket. 

“All I wanted was your honesty,” you whispered, the voice coming out broken as you looked up at Bruce’s face, knowing your eyes were turning red and puffy as you sniffled. Bruce’s expression changed quickly from a mere concern to something like regret, or maybe it was just sadness as he watched you.

“That’s all I wanted, yet you lied about everything. You told me you were someone you are not and for that I cannot forgive you. 

Gif Credit: Not me or Jorgia. I could not find the source but I think it was another blog on Tumblr. If you know, message us and I will link it. 

Kol Mikaelson - Let Me Help You

I adore Kol so I thought I’d do this. Also a very merry Christmas to all you guys

You wanted one night, one night when all this vampire crap didn’t completely invade your existence… but no. There was a knock at the door. Sighing, you got up, rushing to the front door and peeling it open only to find the one and only Kol Mikaelson. You didn’t know him that well, only his brother Klaus who was, in the nicest way possible, a dick. “Kol?” You asked, crossing your arms. He smiled weakly, removing his hand from his side and waving it slightly. His palm was coated in red as he pushed down on his wound. “What happened?” You inquired, holding his arm and dragging him inside. “Nothing much.” He chuckled, pulling the door shut behind him.

You rolled your eyes, taking off his coat and ushering him into the dining room. “If you wanted to get me naked, Y/N, all you had to do was ask.” He laughed, blood trickling from his lip. You shot him a dirty look, trying to take his shirt off too. “I’m trying to help you.” You said, biting your lip, struggling to get his t-shirt over his arm because he was Kol and Kol just wasn’t a helpful person. “Let me help you!” You exclaimed. He stayed quiet after that though his eyes were full of amusement as you removed his shirt.

You tried not to look at his chest, the way his muscles moved as he breathed, instead at the hole in the side of his abdomen. “See something you like, Darling?” He smirked. You were in half a mind to dig your finger into the side but decided that glaring would do just as well. “What the hell happened?” You turned him onto his side, earning a low groan as your fingers ran down his back, seeing that the hole went right through his body.

“Just a run in with the Salvatores, the usual antics.” You sighed, you heard of Damon and Stefan Salvatore but you’d never actually met either of them. “Why isn’t it closing up?” You breathed, panicking. “Oh well, you see, there may be some stake left in there.” He moaned as you prodded his side. “Somewhere between my-” he winced, “pancreas and,” he winced again, “kidney.”

You glared at him, pushing him on your couch and crawling over him to get a better view. “I always thought our first time would be in a bed but I’m not one to judge.” His voice broke slightly at the end, beads of sweat dripping down his forehead. “What am I supposed to do?” You shouted in frustration. He grabbed your wrist, looking at you intently. “Y/N, Darling, get something to take it out.” You rolled your eyes, sprinting towards the kitchen, rifling through one of the drawers. “Corkscrew?” You called. “My abdomen isn’t a bottle of wine, Y/N.” You bit back a retort, searching through a cabinet. “Scissors?” “It’s a stake!” “I’ll stake you myself in a minute, what am I looking for?” “Pliers!”

You swung open doors, clearing shelves and searching through drawers until you found a pair of pliers. You raced back into the lounge to see Kol looking pale and sweating profusely. “This is going to hurt.” “It’s not really a picnic right now either, Darling.” With a disgruntled look, you dug the pliers into his side, earning a loud groan from Kol, his back arching. “I can’t reach anything!” You shouted, opening the pliers and shoving them further into his skin. The wound was big and bloody, ripped open by your every movement. “Jesus, Y/N!” He cried out. You gripped something with the pliers, shaking it briefly as the original grunted. “I think you got it that time, Darling.” He joked, his face pained. You knelt on his chest, pulling out the pliers and hopefully whatever you had caught with them.

The pliers held a piece of wood, both instruments soaked in red. You threw them to the side before looking at his face. “Is it all gone?” You asked seriously. His eyes flicked from yours to the wounds as he leant forward to support himself. You slipped, falling backwards and landing on the floor with a thud. He rolled over, falling on top of you, his hands either side of your head, lifting himself effortlessly. Your hand brushed his wound, the hole in his skin closing up in front of your very eyes. When all that was left was his very muscled torso, you glanced up at him to find him already staring. “Now, Y/N,” he smirked, his face surprisingly close to yours. “Considering I already have my shirt off…”

Hearts Wide Open

(gif credit to the creators)

Part 9 - Calm Before the Storm

Master List

Pairing: Jensen x Reader
Word Count: 2,287
Warnings: language
A/N: Man, it has been forever and a day since I posted this and I apologize. But I have the rest of it mapped out and will be finishing it today. There are only 2 parts left and they will be posted over the next few days! I hope you guys enjoy this! Anyway, feedback is super cool :)

Keep reading

I’m Not Drunk

Request- Can you write a oneshot where reader is generally shy and quiet, but she gets hit with a spell that makes her say whatever is on her mind? Preferably weird, funny, and dark things. Extra points for memes :)))) thank you!

A/N- This was kind of fun to write. Hope it’s what you wanted. Spot the meme! Haha okay but the end is kinda cheesy-ish soo yeah. Tell me what you think! x)

No Pairing

Word Count-1219

“Y/N!” both Dean and Sam shouted from across the hall, to warn you of the witch that was behind you.

It was too late though. The witch had already had the jump on you and blew some sort of dust in your face and pushed you toward the brothers. Sam had caught you while Dean chased after the witch.

“You okay?” Sam asked, helping you stand straight.

Your head felt a little fuzzy but other than that you felt normal. You simply nod, “thanks” you managed to say. You weren’t big on words and avoided long conversations in order to not make a fool out of yourself. You grasp your head as it began to ache, like something was pulsing inside your head.

“You sure you’re okay?” he questioned, seeing your pained expression.

You nodded again, “I’m probably going to die but yeah.” you found yourself saying, but you didn’t think you actually said it out loud rather than to yourself in your head.

“What?” Sam looked concerned. Not only did you exceed your word count but you said something strange.

“I feels like my head’s going to explode.” you tell him, and again he was confused but wasn’t able to say anything since Dean came back.

“She got away.” he said. “You alright?” he asked after a taking one look at you.

“Ugh! I’m better than that bitch is gonna be when I find her.” you grumbled, still holding your throbbing head.

Dean scrunched his face and looked towards Sam, “Uh- that’s gonna be a little hard since she vanished.”

“What do you mean vanished? Did she literally go poof or did your little bow legs not catch her?” you shout, headache all but forgotten.

Sam tried so hard not to laugh at your little outburst but couldn’t. Especially because Dean looked between offended and concerned. How could you call him little? He was taller than you! “The witch hit you with something didn’t she?” he managed to say.

“I’ll survive. I think. Or maybe not. I mean I don’t know she gave me. She just threw some sort of dust in my face. You don’t think I could die, do you? Oh god! What if I die? Well I don’t have any family so I suppose it’ll be fine. No one will worry. Yeah. Well she got away. Let’s hit a bar. For what can potentially be our final drink together.” you started walking off.

“Whoa there Y/N!” Dean yelled chasing after you.

Sam followed, “Y/N! You can’t just say you’re going to die and just walk off.”

You stopped only for a moment, “We’re waist time.” you say and continue walking.

“What are you gonna do?” Dean asked as you were getting into the impala.

You paused, “I’m gonna follow my dreams! Well the way I want to die. Drink one last time and hang out with the best people in the world. So get in the car and drive us to a bar. Just dooo iiit!” you answered and got in the car. Sam was laughing and Dean had his ‘what the hell’ face before getting into the car themselves. Dean drove and you leaned your head against the window. You were looking up towards the sky. “Why are they called clouds?” you mumbled.

Sam turned to look at you, “What?” he questioned, stifling a laugh.

“Why are they called clouds?” you repeat. Out of the corner of your eye you could see them giving you a weird look. “Yeah, like, why are they called potatoes or lizards or something else?”

“That would be weird and stupid.” Dean commented.

“Well if they were called that from the beginning you wouldn’t think it was weird. You only think its weird cause you know they’re called clouds.” you mumble.

“You sure you want to go to a bar? You’re pretty out of it already and we don’t know what that witch did to you either.” Sam said.

“Why so serious?” you say your joker voice.

“I think the spell just make you weird.” Dean said.

“No.” you say, still looking out the window, “I was always weird. I just… never… said… any…thing.” you mumbled sleepily. “Wake me…up when we… get there.” you say before sleep took over you.

“Is she gonna be okay?” Sam asked.

Dean looked at you from the rear view mirror, “I don’t know. I don’t think the witch did anything bad bad. Kinda like the truth one, just different.”

“Right. Like she’s speaking her mind.” Sam said and Dean nodded. “Are we really going to a bar?”

“Well she that’s what she wants right? I say we do what she wants. We owe her at least that, even if it’s just for a day.” he responded.

Sam looked back at your sleeping figure and nodded.

“Y/N~” you heard a voice but it seemed far away. “Y/N~” you heard again. “We’re here.” it was Dean.

You opened your eyes and smiled, “I’m up. I’m up. Mr. Bow legs.”

Dean rolled his eyes but still smiled. Sam had gone ahead to get a table and ordered the beer. You started drinking right away.

“Slow down Y/N.” Sam told you as you chugged down your sixth beer.

“Sammy, always wanted to call you that, if I find that witch again… I’m gonna stab her in her eye. OH! I should just cut out her nose so she can look like Voldemort.” you laughed, but looked around like if he would show up, and when you saw it was safe you continued laughing. “Still gonna kill that bitch.

“She’s drunk” you heard Dean say.

“Drunk? I’m not drunk. I haven’t even felt the buzz yet. This is all just-” you stopped once a man walked into the bar. He looked like any other guy but his boot, they were so long from the front that they curled. On impulse, you stood from your seat, walked up to the man, “What are those!” you yelled throwing out your arms towards his boats.

Sam stood and put his hand on your shoulder, “Uh- Sorry she’s a little drunk. Come one Y/N.” he dragged you back to your table.

“I’m not drunk moose. Seriously. I’m not. Look.” you say and walk in a perfectly straight to prove your point. “See.”

“That doesn’t prove anything. You are drunk so let’s just go.” Dean said as he paid for everything.

You slowly turn your head away and stare out with an ‘Are you kidding me’ face. Sam turned in the direction you were looking but there was nothing.

Dean dragged you out to the impala, and you let yourself. Your head began throbbing again. “Get some sleep.” Dean told you from the front seat.

You look at him through the rear view mirror and nod. You leaned against the window once more and close your eyes, sleep overtaking you already. “If I’m back to normal tomorrow, let’s not mention what happened today. It’ll get weird and awkward and I don’t want to leave.” you shift a little for better comfort. “You guys are like my family and I love you guys” you managed to say before you fell asleep.

Both Sam and Dean smiled and looked at one another. Dean started the car, pulled out of the parking lot, and drove off.

Hope you like it! x)

anonymous asked:

So, for writing/drawing references, 1) how do you write Erik in love so well? Like, it's so amazing how completely besotted he is with Christine. How you do that? Also, 2) how would you go about having your characters showing loving affection/affectionate gestures? I'm having trouble going beyond them treating each other gently. I've never really had a romantic relationship, and no where near the intimacy my characters have. Thanks!

Hello! This is an absolutely lovely compliment–thank you so much. To answer your questions (in a very long, very wordy wall of text),

1. It’s funny, because the relationship I’m in now is the first one I’ve ever been in. I’ve been interested in others in the past, but nothing came of it. And I never really pined over anyone, either. So when I write Erik waxing poetic about his love for Christine, it never came from personal experience. I suppose it just came from getting inside the character’s head. Obviously, how Erik describes his love will differ from another character’s view of love.

With Erik–at least with my interpretation of him–it’s very much about his realization that he has found the only woman–the only person, really–to whom he feels a deep, passionate, almost spiritual connection. And he would naturally be baffled by the entire affair. I CAN write that from experience, though not of the romantic nature (…until now, I guess!). I have felt and do feel that profundity of emotion with certain people. You know when you realize that you just click with someone? And not simply “Hey, this person’s pretty nice and tolerable,” but more along the lines of “I am somehow inexplicably on the same wavelength as this person. This person is beautiful deep down to the core and I can’t believe I’m lucky enough to have met them.” It’s that sort of connection.

Erik’s situation, of course, differs from mine in, um…several ways. He also has to grapple with the fact that he very matter-of-factly believes himself to be monstrous. I always try to integrate this into my writing, and I  like to do it in a way that does seem matter-of-fact because that negative, self-destructive loop is ingrained into Erik’s bones. He can’t escape his conviction that he’s naturally some sort of devilish, destructive force. Something like, “I cannot have her, you see, because I shall break her utterly.” Stated simply, as if it’s concrete truth. 

Which makes his love for Christine–and her kindness towards him–all the more baffling. He can’t come to terms with the fact that he is not only worthy of love, but the recipient of love from such a good soul. And Christine really is a good soul, you know? She’s strong and passionate and kind, and no one has every really extended those virtues to Erik. If you think about it, he’s only ever known chaos, internal and external. Living like that that rattles you. It really does. So when Christine enters his life with such goodness that brings him foreign tranquility, he truly cannot comprehend it. He immediately launches into over-analyzation mode (I am super familiar with this, so I can definitely write from experience when it comes to Erik’s mind going a million miles an hour…my brain never shuts off…). He assumes that he’s somehow driven her to insanity, or that he has to force her to stay with him because any second threatens to reveal her folly in treating him kindly, or that he has to treat her like a fragile piece of glass because “I am habituated to destruction and would likely inadvertently burn down a garden were I to attempt to nurture it.” 

And then of course (again, I’m speaking in terms of my work, not necessarily canon), she continues to love him. And very fact that her love keeps on keepin’ on makes him love her even more. So when I write Erik in love, it’s a very muddled, confusing hectic ball of feelings and frustrations and passion and love of the deepest sort coming from a man with a strong capacity for love who has really only ever known abuse and pain.

It’s really about fleshing out your interpretation of the characters and letting yourself dissolve into them as you write, which sounds terribly dramatic, but that’s how I approach it. And the only way you can get to know them is to play around with writing. It may feel weird or awkward at first, but characters–all characters, not just Phantom ones–kind of DO tend to take on lives of their own the more you write for them, and it gets to a point where it feels very natural writing in a different voice than your own. My version of Erik is cynical and constantly smarting from pain, even if he isn’t aware of it. He plays with language and he’s articulate and often overly refined to compensate for his self-perceived deficiencies. He’s on mentally shaky ground. He’s furious and sorrowful and so full of a love for his passions that it overwhelms him. My version of Christine is introspective and assertive and sassy when she needs to be. She’s also extraordinarily passionate about what she loves, and she’s braver than she thinks she is. She loves just as deeply as Erik. It’s wonderful and challenging to write, and it never gets old. (And I can’t WAIT until this semester ends so I can get back in the swing of fic writing.)

2. As far as translating this sort of love into drawings, I’ve found that using movie stills helps enormously. I keep the above qualities in mind when I want to communicate Erik and Christine’s relationship in a physical sense, and practice using screenshots from romantic films. And ballet performances. Look at ballet and dance performances if you want to see what passion between two people looks like. Holy cow. There’s a reason dance is an art–dancers can capture the entirety of the human experience through the human body, and it’s gorgeous. 

For Erik and Christine, I love drawing “almosts:” Almost kissing, almost touching, almost embracing, etc. Because both, in my mind, worry about hurting each other somehow with physical affection. Erik simply assumes that the second he touches Christine, she’ll explode because he’s so hideous, and Christine senses this and doesn’t want to make him uncomfortable. But the attraction’s there. They just treat each other gently. For them (at least, as I depict them in my artwork), the thrill is in nearness, proximity, which, I’ve found, is actually an emotional and physical thrill like no other when you’re attracted to someone. It’s that moment right before something happens that’s filled with possibility and enormity.

So take this piece, for example:

I wanted to do a couple of things with this piece: communicate their connection on a spiritual level, but also hint at the physical attraction between them in a subtle way. They’re touching, but gently, and perhaps almost kissing. I wanted it to look like they were suspended in breathing, somehow, whether halfway through inhaling or exhaling into each other. That sounds really, really weird, but that’s where my mind was at the time. I wanted to convey the sense of a love so encompassing that they become one. Like that line in Wuthering Heights: “Nelly, I am Heathcliff! Whatever souls are made of, his and mine are the same.”

I also really love the subtle ways the human body can communicate–like the tensing of certain muscles and the relaxation of others, or the tilt of a head, or the arch of the neck…just little things like that that speak volumes. I know I could do with a bit more action in some of my pieces, but I love, love, love subtlety because it’s a challenge to draw and it sticks with you. 

You don’t necessarily need to be in love in order to communicate that love in writing or in art–you just need to start exploring love itself and what it means to your particular characters. 

anonymous asked:

Why do you ignore how much ableist, sexist and problematic Styles is? How he joked about therapies and "nut houses" ? How its easy for him to turn to murder and violence? Or just bc he's a little cute white boy you worship him? Educate yourself. Then you write fanfics about that fuck boy! You are disgusting. I puke about the though the people like you exist.

Going to make a list of problematic characters that have done or still do some/all of the above things (or worse);

  • Peter Hale
  • The Nogitsune
  • Deucalion
  • Theo Raeken
  • Loki
  • James Moriarty
  • Sherlock Holmes
  • James Wesley
  • Damon Salvatore (he raped Caroline under mind control/compulsion)
  • Katherine Pierce (she also raped Stefan under mind control)
  • Stefan Salvatore
  • Klaus Mikaelson
  • Enzo
  • Kol Mikaelson
  • Kai Parker
  • Erik Lehnsherr
  • Killian Jones
  • Peter Pan
  • Felix (OUAT)
  • Regina Mills
  • Rumplestiltskin/Mr Gold
  • Lucifer (SPN)
  • Michael (SPN)
  • The Joker
  • Jerome Valeska (Gotham)
  • Oswald Cobblepot (Gotham)
  • Tate Langon (he also raped someone)
  • Draco Malfoy
  • James Potter
  • Severus Snape
  • Albus Dumbledore

yet all of these characters get loads and loads of love for doing the above things, and worse, to people. Now, yeah, I agree with you on points about Stiles but he’s grown so much as a character yet why are you attacking me over this? If you’d done this politely instead of just being horrible, I could’ve respected and understood your views but Im not even going to try if you can’t respect my views either. Why am I not allowed to like a character? What makes you so mighty and powerful that you get to judge me on what characters I like or dislike? Who are you to tell me that I’m ‘disgusting’ because I like a character? Who are you?

I puke about the thought of people who shit on others - anonymously - and attack them over stupid things like this.

Let people like who they like and dislike who they dislike. I’ve never excused Stiles’ actions, I’ve never said ‘you can’t hate him’. I don’t care if you like or hate him so stop going off on me for liking him when my opinion truly does not concern you.

Girl Of My Dreams

Characters: Dean x Reader, Sam, Charlie
Words: 1117
Requested by Anonymous ( cute Dean x Reader or Sam x Reader based on the song Girl Of My Dreams by Brandon Heath)

Originally posted by acklesjensen

Dean’s Point Of View

           “Charlie!” I waved to Charlie when I saw her in the mall. I was wasting some time and decided to look for some new shirts when I spotted her.

           “Hey, Dean,” she smiled. She was standing with the most beautiful girl I had ever seen, “How are you?” she hugged me.

           “I’m great,” I said.

           “Charlie, I gotta go,” the girl said, hugging her, “I’ll see you later. Text me and we’ll get lunch.”

           “Okay. Bye,” Charlie hugged her.

           I watched as she walked away and I was left standing with Charlie, “Who is that?” I asked.

           “That’s Y/N,” Charlie laughed.


           “She’s single,” Charlie said.

           “Can … can I have her number or something?” I asked, “I mean, would that be too weird?”

           “It’s be very weird,” she said, “I’ll see if I can get you two to meet at some point. I actually think you’d be good together.”


           Charlie hit my shoulder, “Maybe. If you’re lucky.”

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