and i love love love sam and dean finally having a home base that is their own

Dean is bi, a succinct look over the seasons

I’ve seen a few posts about how if/when we get Bi!Dean (and Destiel) some people are worried others may cry ‘fan service’ purely because they haven’t noticed it as a continuous theme through the 12 years of the show so far. So I just wanted to compile a few snippets showing that it has been there all along, it’s not a complete list as I would have to literally spend weeks doing this as there is so much material, but here’s just a few to get started!

1x07: So, it’s season 1, everything is just ramping up so the subtext is very sub… 

Dean rejects painting the college kid yet immediately picks up a skin mag (making it sexual), ignoring the actual mag whilst ogling the kid and noticing the point just above his ass that Sam missed? While Sam in an extremely NON sexual manner does the actual painting? Nice…

2x11: There is no way that scene in Playthings is not meant for the audience to notice and pick up on. 

Originally posted by pinkman

We are supposed to pick up on Sam’s totally accurate and straight faced response to this and how Dean reacts, precisely due to it’s accuracy:

Sam: “Well, you are kinda butch, they probably think you’re overcompensating”. Sam is totally straight faced as this is exactly what he thinks is the case as is taking the opportunity to let Dean know that he knows.

source: @shixpe.   Meanwhile Dean’s face is like ‘shit… I’m that obvious?’

*TINK LOOKS INTO THE CAMERA* 

Season 4: Intro Cas. Now for the ramping up… Dean not so subtly going from small moments of showing himself looking at a guy occasionally or projecting onto Sam “how gay are you?” but now literally licking his own lips, staring at Cas’ lips, comparing them to Thelma and Louise, using his “last day on earth” line on him, I mean, ALL the Cas related chemistry that I won’t even go into here, but here’s a helpful post that has just a few examples of Cas-Dean chemistry over the years which is totally different to any other variation of Cas-Dean, because, that’s love not just lust.

6x09: The one when Dean specifically, not Dean and Sam, is associated with fairies.

source: @spn-liveblog

Where they sexualised the fairies as naked ladies with nipples on show. Where it’s textually and clearly brought to the audiences attention in this same episode that most people associate fairies with queer men.

Where Dean probably “serviced” Oberon king of the fairies (an easy link to queer King Oberyn in GoT, who’s name Dean uses in 12x18 while Sam uses the very heterosexual Stark name).

Meanwhile Sam nicely and true to form, even soulless, stays resolutely heterosexual and bangs the hippie chick while throughout the whole episode in contrast to Dean is hitting on any woman that moves.

It’s not just that Dean is consistently associated with queer subtext but also how Sam is NOT that shows how purposefully this is done for Dean.

7x12: This episode follows multiple episodes with so much “Dean was is in love with Cas subtext” (Cas dying, the trenchcoat, Sam and Bobby’s reactions, Dean’s alcoholism and coping mechanisms coming out, 7x05: Dean projecting Cas’ betrayal and their subsequent lack of communication which led to Cas’ death onto the witch couple by getting them to communicate leading to their making out furiously… immediately followed by Sam trying to get Dean to talk to him about Cas, 7x09 “Cas, black goo…” etc etc etc… 

We have not only blatant Dean-is-queer moments:

Originally posted by frozen-delight

But also the whole episode centers around an immortal who dies because they were in love with a Human who couldn’t forgive them for lying…

Then from 8 onwards we have more Dean / Cas parallels with canon romantic couples: Jess/Sam, Mary/John, Cain/Colette, Don/Maggie, David/Violet, Dean/Cassie, Chronos/Lila, Cacao/Betsy, Jesse/Cesar, Jeffery/his demon, Sam/Amelia, Benny/Andrea, Prometheus/Hayley, Dean/Amara, Ishim/Lily, Gavin/Fiona, Corbin/Michelle…

Ok so this isn’t a Destiel post, it’s a Dean is bi post, but you know, at this point they’re kind of interlinked, because Cas has a male body from season 9 onwards, that isn’t his vessel, it’s him, so there you go, have that too.

10x01:

Originally posted by shirtlesssammy

You mean THESE triplets? The only twins/triplets in the bar? Where the guy behind looks like he’s the additional triplet by his placement and his outfit being the exact in between of the who playing? The ones who Crowley was seen talking to again in the same episode? 

Either way, even if for some reason it wasn’t these particular triplets, cos you know, triplets are super common, it’s still heavily implied (and referred to again throughout seasons 10,11 and 12) that Dean had some kind of sex with triplets and Crowley, who “rubbed off all over him”…

On top of that, sorry to be crude, but we also have these moments:

“…well, you could…” *insert Drowley meta here*.

and:

Then, back to the less crude side, 10x16:

Originally posted by biwarlockhermione

So…. Dean is sick of hiding behind his facade? Do you think maybe it’s time someone came along and helped him see that he no longer needs to hide behind this wall? For a whole two seasons subtext be based around showing that Dean is in love with Cas and also kinda doesn’t mind pop music for example, is actually not quite the dude bro he makes himself our to be and has a facade up that stops him from showing it? 

Insert Amara. Whose name literally means Love. The expositional character of Dean’s innermost feelings, the extension of which is Mary, who ultimately leads to these feelings coming out after having been addressed for these two seasons…

Where an all knowing love - monster taking on her appearance tells him:

“I can see inside your heart. Feel the love you feel. Except…it’s cloaked in shame”

Where in the SAME EPISODE Dean tells Sam that he doesn’t feel love for Amara. So who can this possibly be referring to? For whom might he feel love cloaked in SHAME based on the last 10 years of what he have learned about Dean? Where only two episodes before Dean is told by a “wise woman” (who in film always sees truth) that he is pining for someone. PINING, a term interchangeable with LONGING. With whom do we associate LONGING?

I mean honestly… like we need an exposition for what this is all about…

Originally posted by casclaire

Meanwhile, if there were any issues with Dean feeling that Hunting and being queer are frowned upon they nicely insert an amazingly, fantastically, blatantly mirrored Dean/Jesse Cas/Cesar episode, even down to the brother focused story, the way Cesar and Dean click and interact so similarly to Dean/Cas and the shoulder patting being the most we actually see of them being romantic, I mean JEEZ:

Originally posted by faramaiofnerdwoodforest

And now if he needed to hammer it home even further:

Originally posted by yourfavoritedirector

I mean, I think he gets the picture… it’s nothing to be ashamed of now.

So now thanks to his own personal growth, all this and the extension of Amara, Mary, Dean has finally faced his past, his feelings and given his wall the metaphorical and literal heave - ho:

Originally posted by itsokaysammy

In conclusion:

1. Dean is bisexual. Dean has always been bisexual, he was closeted for so long, but after all this time and thanks to his being in love with one guy in particular and Mary’s role in his self awareness and self acceptance arc, now is more or less the perfect moment to come out… 

2. Dean met and over time went from lusting after to being deeply in love with Cas, who is now male, it is HIS body and he identifies with it as such, who has inconveniently right after this moment of final clarity for Dean, died what seemed to Dean to be a true and permanent Death while he screamed ‘noooo’, fell to his knees in shock and nicely paralleled two of the most doomed - romance canon couples in the show within 5 minutes (Jess and Sam and Cain and Colette).

Both sides of this have come to a climax at the end of season 12, I believe leading to things really happening now moving forwards… So this, when it all comes to the forefront is NOT fan service. 

It has been there all along, at first subtly, then growing, finally becoming core to the main plot of the character and plot based storylines until this point.

anonymous asked:

Dramatic end-of-season 12 predictions: Crowley dies. Cas is thrown out of heaven and made human (either by choice or by force, not sure yet), Mary dies again (probably in a noble way.. but maybe not?), Sam and Dean lose the bunker (the MoL kick them out, empty the place and burn it to the ground as a compromised location). Season 13 sees TFW broken down, human and on the road a lot. No home base anymore & no back-up (all parents gone, no connections to heaven, hell, the MoL.. nothing.) #bleakAF

Or how about not? Let’s go with not. instead, let me offer a counter dramatic finale, yes?

Here we go: You are correct, Mary does go back to Heaven, but in this instance because she asked to be taken back, and the angels have no reason to deny her, so with a fond fare well, she’s returned back “home”, and the boys handle it okay, because they literally get to see her walk away and leave, like going from one place to another, and that’s way better than how they lost their mother before, and certainly better than how they could have lost her again, and they’re at peace with it, because her place was never on Earth with them to begin with since she’d been gone so long.

Dean and Sam find out on of the Princes of Hell is actually leading the BMOL, and along with Mick Davis, end up killing most of the heavy players in the BMOL- Mick having learned not every creature is, in fact, a monster- and some of them need saving. With the BMOL brought to it’s knees, the entrust it to Mick- who had defected to their side already and was working as a double-agent for the Winchesters.

Castiel, for his part, tells Joshua that while he will always be angel and one of their siblings, and while he does care for them, he does not love his angelic brethren, and they are not a family. And Cas basically states he’s stepping away and done with them. Don’t call me for help. Don’t come to me for any reason. Heaven can deal with its own issues, because I’m out. I’m done with this “family” that uses us until they kill us. Because, and Cas doesn’t say it, but they both know; Cas has a family he loves. Cas has a family that loves him. Dean loves him. And when he turns away, Joshua asks, “What is so special about them that you would turn you’re back on Heaven?” And Cas glances at him over his shoulder with a small smile and says, “They’re home.”

We see him step back through the door way to where Dean and Sam are waiting anxiously by the Impala, both of them visibly relaxing at the sight of him. And later, in his newly appointed room, Castiel removes his own grace and stores is away in a vial. Camera shift to where we can now see Dean leaning against the door frame watching.

“You sure about this?”

“The only family I need is here.” Turning to look at Dean. “The family I love is here.”

Dean smiles and nods to the glowing vial. “And that? Is it safe to just store?”

Cas regards it. “I thought I might use it to plant a garden like the one that sprung up when Anna’s grace fell to Earth. All of me belongs to be here and free.”

And then you’ve got Crowley, indisputable King of Hell viciously and violently kicking hell into some actual order and getting rid of the sniveling backstabbers who would dare disrespect him. It is a business- and an army- but it is run with ruthless efficiency, and Hell keeps to it’s own dealings. And final shot is of Crowley on his throne, with Hell literally and figuratively under his thumb, and to his right side, dressed in uniform appropriate to his title, is Lucifer: Knight of Hell and the King’s Hound.

World saved and False Kings and kingdoms fallen, you have Team Free Will in the Bunker War Room, and a general since of loitering from Sam until Dean and Cas walk in- Castiel now donning his own set of human clothing that’s not quite what they would wear, but suits Castiel.

“Well?” Sam asks. “World saved. Again. What now?”

Dean sucks in a breath and lets it out, scratching his head at a loss. When he opens his mouth again, he’s interrupted when a flat screen on the wall not really noticeable before lights up and we see Mick on the screen.

“Hello, Gentlemen. Everyone home and settled?”

They all kinda smile at each other, because yeah. Yeah they are.

Mick claps his hands and leans forward excitedly. “Excellent! If you wouldn’t mind, as a gesture of thanks and our new found partnership: I would like to give you gift.”

“What kind of gift?” asks Sam, brows furrowing.

Mick smirks. “What would you say to giving your bunker a technological upgrade?” They all look at each other, and then back to a grinning Mick who winks. “There are so many lives to be saved, after all.”

Pan out, fade to black, credits! Booyaka!

S13 is leading into making the MOL an actual academy to train and organize hunters, which ties into the spinoff “Wayward Daughters”, and there are constantly x-over episodes between the two.

YOU. ARE. WELCOME.

(Ask Box Open)

One Shot Masterlist

Avengers

Loki

A Pearl In The Rocks (completed)

Thor dumped Loki with the Avengers, believing it would help his little brother. It wasn’t long before the two of you became fast friends, and you ended up being the only person in Stark tower Loki would talk to.

Promise (completed)

You are Loki’s old lover and Thor has brought you down to convince him to stop his madness and go home. It doesn’t end the way he’d planned, and Stark soon discovers the lengths that Loki is willing to go to just for you.

The Old Meets The New (completed)

Loki is up to his usual antics. And by antics, I mean trying to poach you from the Avengers and turn you Loki-evil (outside of a coffee shop no less). But when your ex-husband approaches, he finds out that he’s not the scariest thing in your life. When he finds out why you’re more scared of a Midgardian than you are of him, things get messy.

Frozen In Time (completed)

This is set in an AU where Loki is temporarily teamed up with the Avengers due to mutual benefit. It is also a crossover with Supernatural. You and Loki have always had a close bond. Ever since you met, you only felt like you could depend on each other, making you an inseparable duo. One day, Loki is possessed by a demon and tortures you. The Winchester’s and Castiel are brought in to get the two of you back, but when Loki is exorcised things between you are shaky. You find yourself unable to be near him and Loki’s self-hatred begins to eat away at him. Can the two of you ever regain the bond you had before? Or will this mean the end of both of you? 

Loki/Reader/Thor

What We Want And What We Get (NSFW)(incest - not between Loki and Thor)

For thousands of years, Loki has given in to his dark desires. And, for thousands of years, Thor has resisted his. But Loki’s patience has run thin when he realises you - his little sister - is becoming increasingly distressed by Thor’s rejection. Loki finally takes things into his own hands and shows Thor that giving into his desire for his little sister is worth the guilty conscience.

Clint/Reader/Bruce

Hurt The One You Love (NSFW)(completed)

You’re an assassin. Having spent most of your childhood living in institute’s like Natasha’s Red Room, you’ve learned to live and breathe the lifestyle. After dropping off the map suddenly, you resurface again five years later to take Fury up on his offer of a place in the Avengers. But you’re different than you were. Your guilty conscience is weighing down on you and you find yourself questioning everything you’d done in the last five years. To make matters worse, throughout your stay with the Avenger’s, you’d developed feelings for Clint. The battle of New York had kept you occupied but ever since it ended you’d been drowning in the guilt and shame of your past and battling your feelings for a man that could never love the person you were. In an effort to rid yourself of those feelings, you fall into the arms of Bruce. A man that knows all too well what it’s like to be afraid of your own monsters. 

Bucky

Pretty Tears And Dead Soldiers (NSFW)(incest)

You and Bucky have been running around together for what seems like forever. Hiding your relationship from the world and appearing to everyone else as the perfect siblings with the perfect relationship. No one had seen a brother and sister be so close before. You spend your alone time together, making promises and breathing in each other’s skin. But what happens when Bucky enlists in the army? Decades of heartbreak, death, and a super-soldier with amnesia that can’t seem to shake his memory of you.

A Strange Kind Of Home (completed)

Bucky comes to after another one of his ‘brainwashed’ episodes. Only this time, he doesn’t remember who you are. Steve fights for you to tell him who you are but you’re convinced it’s not what’s right. How could you tell Bucky who you are and force him to relive a nightmare he’d forgotten?

Tony

You Made Me (NSFW)(incest)

At a young age, Tony had learned the hard way that no one loved their baby sister’s the way he did. But when that forbidden knowledge entered his brain, it didn’t stop the two of you from traveling the world just so you could play at being a couple for a night. And then your parents died and you ran away from the guilt, leaving Tony behind to build an empire in your name. But now you’re back - years later - and Tony wants nothing more than to pick up where the two of you left off.

You 1, Tony 0 (completed)

Imagine winning an argument that you and Tony Stark are having, and the rest of the Avengers all being super impressed. 

Bucky/Reader/Steve

The Broken Musketeers (NSFW)

You’re a morally flawed person, and yet Captain America is your best friend. In an attempt to teach you how to be a good person, Steve asks you to look after his friend Bucky while he’s on a mission. Little did you know, Steve hadn’t just wanted you to babysit a PTSD-ridden super soldier. He wanted you and Bucky to save each other.

Steve

When Plans Go Awry (NSFW)(completed)

After months of you and Steve beating around the bush, you ask him to help you put on lotion one day. That was just the push Steve needed to go that step further.


Supernatural

Team Free Will

Funerals and Cocoons (completed)

You’ve been asked to give the eulogy at a relative’s funeral. However, your nerves almost get the best of you and Team Free Will are there to support you when it’s finally over.

A Crusade For Innocence (completed)

You crash one of TFW’s hunts in an attempt to team up with them. Impressed by your skills and reputation as a hunter, they agree. Months go by and suddenly they notice changes in you. It doesn’t take them long to figure out it has to do with your traumatised childhood you suffered at the hands of demons.

Sam/Reader/Dean

When The Student Becomes The Teacher (NSFW)(completed)(wincest - not between Sam and Dean)

Based on this request: I was wondering if u could write one with SamxSis!ReaderxDean? Where they’re teaching her how to touch herself and stuff happens.

The Taboo Is In The Blood (NSFW)(wincest - not between Sam and Dean)

Growing up, it had been you and Sam against Dean and John. And then John died, Sam came home and suddenly it was the three of you against the world. What grew from that was a love and desire that none of you were willing to admit to - Sam and Dean had fallen in love with their little sister.

The Morning After (completed)

You and Dean have been dating for a long time, but after Bobby died things started to go downhill. Dean became aggressive. He started drinking more and picking fights where none existed. Then one night - after a hunt goes wrong - Dean ends up in another one of his drunken spirals and says things to you that he can never take back. He wakes up in the morning - expecting to kiss and make up - only to find you gone and Sam berating him before chasing after you.

Nightmares  (NSFW)

You (reader) will be inserted into the Supernatural storyline (starting from s7ep17) as the girlfriend of both Sam and Dean. You were molested as a child and ended up in a mental health hospital as a result. This is where you meet Sam and Dean, and your polyamorous adventures begin. In this story, you must find a way to balance your hunter life, romantic life, and mental illness. 

Sam

Wednesday’s In July (NSFW)(incest)

For most of his life, Sam had struggled with his feelings for his little sister. Little does he know, you aren’t as innocent and sweet as he thinks you are.

Collar Me Vanilla (NSFW)(completed)

Imagine being vanilla and Sam introduces you to the world of BDSM.

Numb (completed)

When Sam lost his soul, you lost a part of yourself as well. After spending months on the road with the cold imitation of the man you used to love, you finally break and try to end it all. Except Sam isn’t ready to let you go - no matter if he has a soul or not. 

Dean

Home (completed)(NSFW)(incest)

Based on this request: I was wondering if you could do a wincest Deanxreader nsfw; Dean is secretly in love with shy reader and one day she finds his journal full of his dreams and pictures of her? And he walks in and is super embarrassed like the puddin’ he is?

When Love Isn’t Enough (completed)

Dean shows up on your doorstep beaten and bloodied. You let him in - no questions asked - just like you always do. But after having broken up two years prior, these little visits are starting to take a toll. You’re forced to ask yourselves why you keep holding on to each other the way you do.

To The Moon And Back (completed)

Just a short one-shot on how Dean Winchester would propose to you.

The Demons Of My Past (completed)

Ever since coming back from hell, you’d been suffering from flashbacks and nightmares of what happened. Knowing exactly what you’re going through, Dean offers to stay by your side and help you fight through it. 

Castiel

Angels And Winchesters (NSFW)(completed)(incest)

The Winchester’s have always had a thing for Castiel’s little sister, but when Dean takes it too far one day, they soon find out that so does Castiel.

A Serving Of Awkward Wrapped In A Shy Little Bow (completed)

You’re desperately in love with Cas but you’re so awkward and shy around him that it’s comical. And, of course, in true Winchester style, Dean and Sam tease the hell out of you for it. 

Angel (NSFW )(completed)

You’re trying on clothes in a dressing room when your kinda - boyfriend Castiel drops in for a visit. You try and reprimand him for crossing boundaries again, but that all dies on your tongue when he says Dean gave him the sex talk and he doesn’t want to wait for you to get home to try out what he’s learned.

Lucifer

For My Love, An Apocolypse (completed)

You’re Gabriel’s soulmate. Fated by God himself to be connected to the angel. Of course, being best friends, it’s something the two of you get a kick out of and make the most of. But one day Gabriel starts panicking and jumping you from country to country. Then Lucifer catches up to you and insists he has something to confess. Gabriel fears that there will be blood on your hands if Lucifer doesn’t get what he wants. But what could the Devil possibly want from you? 

Balthazar

A Silk And Lace Kind Of Christmas (NSFW)(completed)

Based on this request: Can you do the reader calling for Balthazar so she can surprise him in her holiday lingerie but once he actually shows up, she gets a little insecure and he comforts her and then loving/rough sex

A Little Bit More (NSFW)(completed)

This was based off an old imagine: Imagine having teased Balthazar all night and then he finally breaks and fucks you against the wall.

Blowing Off Steam (NSFW)(completed)

You and Balthazar had never gotten along. The minute the two of you were in the same room together WW3 broke out. Only this time it’s different. This time the tension breaks and suddenly your sexual frustration isn’t so frustrating anymore.

Invasion Of Privacy (NSFW)(completed)

Whilst in the shower, you accidentally pray to Balthazar. Of course, he shows up and insists on joining you. You manage to stand your ground but not before he leaves you with jelly-like legs, a rapidly beating heart and a promise that there’ll be more.

Gabriel

Sweet Promises (NSFW)(completed)

Much to your dismay, Gabriel pays you a visit. As usual, you go on the defensive and threaten his life, only this time he manages to finally see the self-deprecating core of your anger. He then takes it upon himself to show you just how much you’re worth.

Chuck

God The Imperfect (completed)

Chuck agonises over your contradictions and his feelings until Charlie tells him to buck up and ask you out.

Kevin

God Gets What God Wants (completed)

Based on this request: The reader really likes Kevin but she is more on the road then the boys so she and Kevin talk barely, write more. And they send each other hearts and kiss emojis and stuff like that. And one day when he is kind of down/exhausted from working on the tablet, she tells him that he is lovely and loveable and she would date him and he says that back but they both think it’s just platonic what they have and so no one makes a move. Then he dies. Then chuck brings him back instead of sending him to heaven. Then it continues, just that she is in the bunker more often Till Chuck is tired of them and says that it took him so long to make them perfect for each other and he doesn’t want his work to be for nothing?


Doctor Who

11th Doctor

Never Change (completed)

Imagine being the Doctor’s companion as a child, and after leaving him and growing up to get a job in the FBI, you run into him again. But this time, he’s in handcuffs.


Sherlock

Sherlock

We’re All We’ve Got (NSFW)(completed)(incest)

As children, the world had ostracised you and Sherlock - your family being the main culprit of this - but it wasn’t until the two of you grew up that you figured out why. It was because everyone had seen, long before either of you did, that you were more than just siblings to each other.

Sherlock/Reader/Moriarty

Cat And Mouse Game (completed)

You and Sherlock are best friends, have been for a while, and he’s begun developing feelings for you. Unfortunately, you’re in a semi-secret relationship with Moriarty.

Moriarty

Invaluable Assets (NSFW)(completed)(incest)

Just smut without plot.

Happy Anniversary (completed)

Imagine Sherlock learning you and Moriarty were childhood sweethearts when you walk in on them having tea.

*Current as of 05/13/17*

(If there are any links that do not work or link to the wrong fic, please let me know. xo)

**Indicates the fic contains smut

ONE SHOTS

Red** (04/02/16) This is the history of the reader and Dean Winchester and will span the majority of the seasons. Starts in about season 2 through right before Dean goes to Purgatory, up to MOC!Dean, and right on through to season 11. Reader knows nothing of the hunting world. 

I Am Yours ** (04/22/16) Dean has been in hell and the reader is having a hard time coping with life. TW: Anxiety.

Come Over (04/30/16) Based off the song Come Over by Kenney Chesney, It’s a little angsty. It’s a little sexy. It’s a little fluffy. 

The Real You (04/30/16) Based off the song The Real You by Three Days Grace, angsty MOC!Dean. 

Faster Gun (05/01/16) Based off the song Faster Gun by Little Big town, Mentions of blood and injuries, language, little bit of PG-13 foreplay.

Who’s Counting? (05/01/16) Based off the song Kashmir by Led Zeppelin, Mentions of drug use, language, angst if you squint. 

Hurt (05/03/16) Based off the song Hurt by Johnny Cash, Angsty as hell. Like, I cried writing this. Drinking and driving (NEVER DO THIS!) Language. TW: Anxiety.

Stoned on Your Love** (05/12/16) Based off the song Tennessee Whiskey by Chris Stapelton, Language, brief mentions of sex and masturbation.

Your Guardian Angel (05/17/16) Based off the song Your Guardian Angel by Red Jumpsuit Apparatus, other than language, this is pure fluff.

Insomnia (06/01/16) Consider this a preface to the Pilot. Dean and the Reader reunite after a couple years and Dean has a request.

Lucky** (06/07/16) Based off the song Feed my Frankenstein by Alice Cooper, Reader encounters Demon Dean in a bar… 

Lose Control (06/09/16) The Winchesters keep taking over the Reader’s hunts and she is less than pleased about it.

My Favorite One (06/18/16) Reader recounts her history with Dean after someone close to the Reader finds something of his…

Salvation (10/05/16) The Mark has made Dean a different person and affected your relationship with him. Is there anything you can do or say to help him through this difficult time?

Crazy, Stupid, Love (10/31/16) Dean has no idea you have feelings for him and you may or may not be acting irrationally about it. 

Out of My Head** (11/21/16) Dean is a little insensitive toward your feelings and you try to make yourself forget.

Where I Belong** (11/23/16) Love is a crazy thing and sometimes creeps up on us. What will Dean do when he realizes just how much you mean to him? 

All That Matters** (11/28/16)  It’s a chance meeting, a one night stand that neither of you can forget, years of regret and longing, and a lot unspoken between you. What will happen when Dean Winchester waltzes back into your life again?

Always** (02/04/17) Dean and the reader meet in a bar just days before he’s set to go get Sam and look for their dad. While he didn’t mean to drag her into the life, and he tried with all his might to keep her out of it, fate has other plans.

Long, Lean, and Lethal** (04/27/17) The Reader finally takes things into her own hands when it comes to her feelings for Dean. 

End Credits (05/08/17) Dean’s made his deal and the Reader is unhappy about it. Denial and a hefty dose of ignoring Dean seem to be her way of trying to fix her broken heart, but will it work?

SERIES

KISS MY LIPS YOU FOOL (AU Neighbor!Dean) Reader is having a rough day and is rescued by her handsome new neighbor.
Kiss My Lips You Fool Pt. 1 (03/26/16)
Kiss My Lips You Fool Pt. 2 (03/27/16)

ORDINARY DAY** Dean gets in contact with the Reader after years apart and begs for some ordinary time with her. Catch is, the Reader doesn’t know about his deal or how much time he has left. Will this make or break the leftover time Dean has left?
Ordinary Day Pt. 1  (09/10/16)
Ordinary Day Pt. 2  (10/01/16)

SLOW** The reader and Dean have always fought feelings for each other. What will happen when they reunite after years apart? 
Slow (08/07/16)

ONE SHOTS

Sweet Relief** (06/21/16) AU Nurse!Sam. Reader is a Nursing Student and is doing her first Round of Clinicals and is lucky enough to shadow Sam.

Amnesia  (06/25/16) Sam gets hit with an amnesia spell on a witch hunt. 

Home** (11/07/16) Daddy!Sam. The Reader finds out she’s pregnant and leaves the life, desperate for normalcy and safety for her unborn child. Somehow, Sam and her are reunited. How will they figure things out for them and the future of their family? Set in beginning to mid season 8. 

Aftermath  (11/12/16) Sam has just chained Lucifer and and dove into the pit and the Reader is having a hard time coping. 

SERIES

THE CONSERVATORY (AU!Sam) Both the Reader and Sam go to the San Francisco Conservatory of Music and meet by happenstance. Could it be true love or will the past intervene to separate them?
The Conservatory Pt. 1  (04/13/16)
The Conservatory Pt. 2  (04/13/16)
The Conservatory Pt. 3  (05/16/16)

RUSH** (AU!Sam) Based off the song My Best Friend’s Girl by The Cars. The Reader met Sam after eye flirting with him at her favorite cafe for weeks. But how will her best friend react to this new development?
Rush (05/03/16)
Rush Pt. 2 (11/03/16)

INTO THE FIRE** Season 1. The Reader finds out Sam is back in the life. 
Into the Fire  (07/02/16)
Into the Fire Pt. 2  (07/14/16)
Into the Fire Pt. 3  (08/03/16)
Into the Fire Pt. 4  (08/20/16)
Into the Fire Pt. 5  (08/23/16)

anonymous asked:

hey there, so i always wondered about the purpose of dean's church confession in 10x16, what the hell were the writers trying to tell us?

Originally posted by dmitri-mish-ackles

Well…. it’s a part of Deans whole storyline since the pilot - a component of the exposition that his 12 years of story that we have been watching is all emotionally driven, a character based arc rather than plot based, all centering around Dean’s journey to self acceptance and self worth.

It’s also in large part a part of my #performing!dean tag and I imagine every meta writer’s performing!dean tag as performing!dean is a large part of this arc, the deconstruction of which leads to his self acceptance and works alongside his self worth.

At this point in 10x16, Dean is realising that he doesn’t want to die, he doesn’t think he deserves to die…

Remember all Dean’s self hatred, all his self loathing and feelings of worthlessness from earlier seasons? Remember how he constantly put himself in harms way because he felt that any life, anyones, was pretty much more worthy of living than his own?

Well, that has changed by this point. He still cares for others and their lives in a massive way and will still put himself in harms way to protect them but it isn’t with the same nonchalance towards his own life, he isn’t actively thinking that his own life is worthless anymore…

Remember this?

Originally posted by castielsource

Remember how, over the whole show but particularly since Hell Dean has grown, has evolved, not to change himself as such but to change the way he sees and portrays himself to others? How he has started up to 10x16 to let some of his guard down? How only 4 episodes earlier he admitted to liking and listening to Taylor Swift in front of Sam for example? How he has become more emotionally available with Cas since purgatory?

This is all part of the deconstruction of Performing!Dean and his emotional journey to self acceptance… Self acceptance is for me Dean’s whole arc since the pilot. It is with key points such as going to Hell, the introduction of Cas and more recently the introduction of Amara as the exposition but then Mary as her extension as the actual catalyst that we have come to the climax of this arc for Dean in 12x22.

There are moments throughout the show though that of course build to this moment and this is just one of them. The others being for example:

1x09: Dean walks away from Sam to call John about going back to their family home, facing the ghost of Mary, he breaks down and sobs into the phone, revealing that he is an extremely emotional person and family is his weakness but also his biggest focus in life.

2x11: Dean asks Sam why everyone assumes they’re gay, Sam tells Dean he is a bit butch and seems like he is overcompensating (gee, ya think?!).

2x13: Dean and Cassie: basically a huge exposition for the fact that Dean portrays himself as a give-a-shit lothario but when it comes to it he loves and he loves hard, he’s a gentle lover and fell in love with a passionate woman who only left him because she thought it was for his own good and what he wanted, they argue, they stare deeply at each other, they fight, because they care. Sam even tells Dean:

“What’s interesting is you guys never really look at each other at the same time. You look at her when she’s not looking, she checks you out when you look away. It’s just a… just an interesting observation in a… you know… observationally interesting way.”

I even did a gifset parallel with 12x19 of this episode cos dude, exposition much. She’s even called Cassie FFS *Tink looks into the camera*. gifset here.

4x01: Cas looking straight into Dean’s heart and seeing that he doesn’t think he deserves to be saved etc. leading to Dean then convincing Cas himself that they deserve to have Free Will, that they can save the world and they do by s5. *sobs a little at how beautiful this story is and it’s only 2 years in*

The whole of season 7: Dean is an alcoholic mourning Cas and worried for his brother then also mourning Bobby, feeling his life is worthless if he can’t save and protect his family.

MoC era: Dean loses what makes Dean Dean. He becomes hard, full of anger and pain, without the soft side. This is frightening and he would rather die than become like this.

Season 11: Amara is a complete exposition of Dean’s emotions, as I wrote it a few long posts about Amara, search #amara on my blog but here and here are the main ones. She exposes that he feels love but also shame, that he is holding himself back from something (add this to 11x11′s: follow your heart and all the heart / love themes of the early season right before Cas gets taken away and Dean spends the last half of the season desperately trying to get him back while Amara, all powerful being has to use Cas to get to Dean).

Season 12: Mary is the extension of Amara, she is the catalyst for Dean to finally face himself, all this has built and built to the point where, nearing 40 years of age he finally doesn’t want to sublimate anymore, he doesn’t want to hide. This post is my explanation for how Mary is exactly what he needed at this point, I think I wrote it mid season, but it was clear by 12x03 that this was her role and of course 12x22 was a great big wave hello and goodbye to Performing!Dean, another meta I wrote called “Dean Winchester is going to die” after 12x11 harked at the fact that this was coming and wasn’t it GLORIOUS?!

In his confrontation with Mary in 12x14 Dean essentially tells Mary that he thinks he deserves better, this is a huge deal for Dean - a HUGE deal for his self worth arc. He then in 12x22 addresses the fact that his upbringing wasn’t FAIR, that he didn’t cope well with it, that it has damaged him. He lets his wall down, he also literally blows down the walls of the bunker with the grenade launcher, the metaphorical taking down his walls, even Toni says it was a metaphor to hammer this home to us…

So yeah 10x16 is one of the key components throughout the years to show us that Dean’s story is all about his emotional journey to self acceptance of his softer side, the side that he hides by using the Performing!Dean facade, also he talks about people, feelings that he wants to experience differently to before or for the first time…  make of that what you will but for me…

In 10x14 just two episodes earlier we have: Dean choosing Cas over Crowley (to give the first blade to) right after a deleted scene in which Crowley and Cas have a whole conversation about Dean being CAS’s boyfriend rather than Crowleys, and Crowley telling Cas that he is running himself into the ground trying to save him, also Cain paralleling Cas with Colette after telling Dean he knows him.

Not long before that we had the burger date where Dean asked Cas to take him out if he got really bad with the MoC then there was the episode where they were heavily paralleled with a married couple where the wife had to let the husband go for fear of killing more people I mean, not to mention the whole Demon!Dean arc where Cas sacrificed himself to save Dean, where Dean knows it and seems to be… clearing a space on his bed but Cas is pulled away by Heaven again, I love this visual metaphor, where then Destiel is actually brought up on screen in 10x05…. you cannot tell me that…

Originally posted by foxylosu

So yeah, this scene in 10x16 is just part of the overall exposition for Dean’s emotional journey throughout the show, it’s a part of the intricately woven pattern of Performing!Dean and Destiel that alongside other aspects of his journey make up a large part of Dean’s overall self acceptance and self worth arc, with the Performing!Dean side climaxing in 12x22, we are just waiting for the second part now… 

anonymous asked:

Do you know any j2 Fics with chubby jensen or jared? Most good ones were deleted on lj and there's isn't much on Ao3. Help

hello dear! sadly I don’t know a lot of about this trope,only the famous, and I am sure you’d read them already, these are what I could find on my library:

Slipped Inside Your Right Back Pocket   Jared is a spoiled, pampered, Manhattan brat. His problems range from deciding which pair of Gucci shoes to wear to creating seating arrangements for dinner parties. He’s had the privilege of inheriting an incredible talent from his incredible aunt: singing.

Except, at the debut party for his first album, it completely bombs.

After a page six worthy tantrum, and under the advisement of his aunt, Jared flies to a remote island on the Pacific for a ‘spiritual and creative treatment program.’ He expected pool boys and marble whirlpool tubs.

What he gets are hikes into the wilderness that cause sunburns and a myriad of other unspeakable atrocities. And the assistant village captain, Jensen, who, as a leader of people, doesn’t own a single pair of dress shoes or silk shirts. If Jared can last six weeks on the island, his aunt will produce an amended album. If he comes home early, he’ll have to navigate the music industry on his own.

Featuring Cher, Filipino moms who don’t take no for an answer when it comes to food, and songs by kd lang, Nathaniel Rateliff, Lady Gaga, Sturgill Simpson, and Birdy. Based on the anime and manga Barakamon.

Living Together 101   If Jared wants to keep his New York apartment, he needs to find a roommate. If he wants to get tenured, he needs to publish more. Jensen, who’s also teaching at Columbia, seems like a perfect fit: easy-going and responsible, but also quiet and unassuming. When they become friends, it’s a bonus. When they pretend to be a couple, it seems like a great idea – until it all falls apart.  Loosely based on the Barbra Streisand/Jeff Bridges schmoop fest The Mirror Has Two Faces.

A Surfeit of Tarts   Jared schemes and keeps a recipe journal. Jensen begrudgingly eats the flan.

The Gifts They Gave   The Padalackles watch old home movies of a Christmas past.

For the Love of Jensen Ackles A.N.  I wanted to write for spn_ficathon, but I was too late to sign up. So, I stole a prompt. Is that illegal?

The prompt: A J2 version of The Ugly Duckling. Jensen is the fat kid at school and Jared either bullies him/is his only friend, but because he’s younger he doesn’t stand up to the bullies. The boys lose touch but meet again in college where Jensen has lost the weight, but is still very self-conscious and shy. Feelings ensue and they go back home to visit Jensen’s family/friend and meet up with the bullies again.

Pool Side Politics  Jensen is shy, awkward, and a little chubby. Jared is outgoing, fit, and generally sexy. And he happens to be Jensen’s pool boy.

Cold Turkey Sandwiches   Post-Thanksgiving J2 fluff wherein Jared is a holiday gourmet and Jensen likes cranberry sauce from a can.

Jensen Ackles: Bigger, boned. [or Go Downstairs and Get Me Some More Sugar For My Coffee.] Barely a week into filming, Kripke approaches, small steps and scratching at his neck, hunched. When he mutters, “Does Jensen look kind of …fleshy to you?” the bread roll half eaten in Jared’s mouth topples out.

Learning to Love the Chub  For this prompt at the Chubwinchesters drabble-meme: Dean has put on a good fifty pounds. Sam finally tells Dean that he really likes it and would like it even more if Dean was bigger.

The Monster Returns  This is a sequel to The Monster and has basically no other plot than Dean’s kinda fat, Sam’s kinda fat, they both love being fat and love each other being fat.

No Take Backs Dean is 5 months pregnant. He looks stunning with his cute, round belly and his chubby face and hands and everywhere.

Pig!Dean Funnily enough, there isn’t any pie or vengeful witches or waitresses or Sam eating veggies (and whole wheat, what the fuck?) or demonic pregnancies or bodily fluids involved in the unmaking of Dean Winchester. It’s the usual brand of weirdness when the boys are on a hunt, only this time Dean winds up as the other white meat – that is to say, a pig. Sam, unspoken fondness for Dean’s animal self, thinks karma’s got an awesome sense of humor.

also, @tipsysam posted a wonderful list HERE

And you can find the chubwinchesters community on livejournal and AO3 HERE AND HERE

hope this helps a little ♥

anonymous asked:

Do you have any Destiel fic recommendations? I've only ever read T&S and then never really got round to reading anymore.

hooooo boi, I’ve ALWAYS got fic recs, just ask @blissfulcastiel​ :)) You can always check my ficrec page here anytime, too! I pretty much only read destiel anyway. 

If you’re looking for more fics that are similar to T&S with their angsty nature, here’s some you could check out:

1. The Inexhaustible Silence of Houses [AO3]

Author: Askance
Words: 31,820
Summary: Almost two years after the world doesn’t end, Castiel falls from grace—and loses his voice in the process. It is the impetus for confession and change; before long, he is settling into a loving relationship with Dean, the Winchesters are tired, and hunting for a place to land has taken precedence to hunting anything else. Dean and Castiel fall in love with the strange little house on the end of Swallowtail Drive, and for a little while life is as it should be—sweet, affectionate, and beginning afresh.

But more and more Castiel sees and hears things in the house that beg the question of whether or not a place itself can be alive. The walls and rooms seem to shift and grow and breathe, and one night, Dean comes home from a hunt changed in a way that Castiel cannot explain. In the months that follow, their domestic bliss takes turns for the dark and sour, and the confusion of their circumstances will ultimately test everything Castiel knows about the man he loves, and everything he believes to be true.

2. Yare [AO3]

Author: a_frayed_edge
Words: 43,858
Summary: Four years ago Castiel Lord married local mechanic, Dean Winchester, and for two years their relationship flourished, until a decision made by Castiel sent Dean out the front door, and divorce papers were served. Now Castiel is two days from the alter with a new fiance on his arm, and he’s over Dean, he really is, their relationship dissolved for completely valid reasons. Of course, that’s a lot easier to believe when Dean isn’t standing in his mother’s back yard, offering an olive branch in the form of a favor for the Lord household. Suddenly memories of their past are everywhere and Castiel is faced with a choice he never thought he’d get again.

Loosely based on the film, The Philadelphia Story

3. There Is No Why [AO3]

Author: PilDoor
Words: 64,212
Summary: Castiel just moved to Moses Lake and thus is new at school. He meets Dean his second week there. Dean is warm and funny and just so nice, but why does everyone at school treat him like that??

Dean’s had an abusive relationship that’s traumatized him, and it stays with him for years, though Cas tries his best to be there for him.

4. Painted Angels [AO3]

Author: WinJennster
Words: 105,637
Summary: Author Castiel Novak has finally hit the big time, with a book based on his failed college relationship with a brilliant painter. He’s put all his pain behind him, but at a book signing, he comes face to face with Dean Winchester for the first time in twelve years, and the reunion doesn’t go like Cas hoped. Dean’s a broken man, with a lot of scars and secrets, shoulders weighed down by his demons and self loathing.

Cas sees a second chance with the man he’s never stopped loving, but Dean’s moved on, and is about to get married. Sam launches a “brilliant” plan to reunite his brother and his best friend, but Cas is worried it will all blow up in their faces, and he’ll go through the agony of losing Dean a second time.

5. Sweaters & Cigarettes [PDF]

Author: lemonoclefox
Words: 149,793
Summary: Dean Winchester is in high school, crushing hard on Castiel Novak, the unbelievably hot goth who Dean does his very best to convince himself he hates, despite the fact that he can’t really stop staring at him.Dean tries, but when the two of them finally cross paths, their first conversation takes a surprising turn. And suddenly, they both find themselves falling harder and faster than they ever could have expected.

6. Blackbird Fly [AO3]

Author: artsyUnderstudy
Words: 163,191
Summary: Nearly a year after starting the fire that claimed the lives of Ruby Darvelle and Anna Novak, fifteen year old Sam Winchester returns home from his stint in court ordered rehab. Sam and his older brother, Dean, struggle to remake their own complicated relationship and the home they’ve lost in the wake of this tragedy, while a chance meeting brings Anna’s brother, the troubled and secretive Castiel, into their lives. Fighting with his recovery, Sam finds himself drawn to the strong and lively Jess, while Castiel and Dean find comfort in one another. As consequences of their past emerge and threaten to tear apart what they’ve carefully rebuilt, they are all forced to reevaluate who their family really is, and to what lengths they’re willing to go to keep it safe.

7. Overture [AO3]

Author: alternaurora
Words: 167,729
Summary: When home has nothing left to offer, Dean Winchester follows his brother out to the east coast. Sam has a new job in the Big Apple, and Dean has no idea what he wants. He’s never had much of a career, and his relationships have all felt like something’s missing. The brothers adopt a dog and Dean feels a spark for the blue-eyed volunteer Castiel Novak, but he knows he’ll never see him again.

A chance meeting with singer Anna Milton brings Dean to The Roadhouse, a struggling music lounge. Anna’s a flirt, but when it’s Castiel behind her at the piano, Dean can’t let him slip away again- except he’s not available, or so he thinks. Dean begins a rocky relationship with Anna, while Castiel becomes the best friend he’s ever known.

Except they both know it’s more than that. It’s everything.

As things fall apart with Anna, everything falls together with Castiel. But when disaster strikes, Dean and Castiel have to fight to hold on to the home and love they’ve found, or else risk losing it forever.
-
“Seeing you two singing together this morning? It’s so obvious, Castiel… The way you look at him? It’s like all those love songs you sing finally make sense.”
-

8. Say Something [AO3]

Author: JhanaMay
Words: 250,052
Summary: No matter how difficult he can be, Dean loves his son. Raising him alone after his mother died hasn’t been easy, but with the support of his family and friends, Dean has made it work. Now that Ben is starting kindergarten, Dean hopes that he can finally relax a little, but the challenges Ben faces at school make Dean realize that their struggles are just beginning. When Ben is assigned a new support teacher, Dean finds that Ben isn’t the only Winchester who has a problem dealing with change.

9. We Found Love (In A Hopeless Place) [AO3]

Author: TalesFromPerdition
Words: 405,680
Summary: Dean and Sam Winchester struggle to survive when their alcoholic father abandons them. Castiel Novak has turned to drugs in his own father’s absence. As their lives spiral out of control, can their new friendship save them, or will it be a catalyst for destruction?

10. Hautley’s Bend [AO3]

Author: ColdIntheStudio
Words: 500,321
Summary: Castiel Novak is used to change. He’s used to being the new kid in school. So when he moves with his family to the small town of Rail Pass, he doesn’t expect things to be much different than the last three towns.
But then he meets Dean Winchester, an aggressive fellow student who sees Castiel as the shiny new toy he and his friends get to mess with. Castiel has had his fair share of bullies in the past, but nothing like this. He’s never felt this way about a bully, or anyone for that matter, before. Maybe something’s wrong with him, that he could feel so attracted to someone who makes his everyday life hell.

But then again, he sees the way Dean looks at him sometimes. And there’s a lot more to Dean Winchester than meets the eye.

Kasimagines Mobile Master List!

All series are completed unless marked otherwise! ENJOY 💋

Independently Written: (Oldest to Newest)

The Day Dean Died - The reader recalls one of the last times she saw Dean before he died. (set around season 3 finale)

Demon Eyes - The reader discovers what happened to Dean following the season 9 finale. (written before we actually knew what happened)

Anchors (Part One, Part Two, Part Three, Part Four, Part Five) // Sequel: Attachments (Part One, Part Two, Part Three) - Follows the relationship of the reader and Dean when meeting in high school and running into each other again 6 years later.

Night Terrors - The reader had a hard time sleeping after a hunt gone horribly wrong.

To Purgatory and Back - The reader desperately tries to deal with Dean’s disappearance after the killing of Dick Roman, only to find him on her doorstep on the one year anniversary.

Just Be Ok - The reader wakes up in the middle of the night to find Dean wildly upset after a hunt gone wrong.

It’s Okay, I Love You - Dean is possessed by a spell that has him intent on killing the reader. When she realizes she can’t get through to him, she does something drastic. (based on the Tris/Four serum scene in Divergent)

Home (Part One, Part Two) - When the reader realizes her feelings for Dean, it leaves her in a complicated situation with her current boyfriend, who doesn’t take the news very well.

Reckless Abandon (Part One, Part Two, Part Three)- Follows Dean and the reader’s relationship as they deal with the consequences of the mark

Sacrifice (Part One, Part Two, Part Three, Part Four) - The reader leaves Dean, believing it to be the only way she can protect him, after he risks his life on a hunt to save her. She eventually finds herself held captive by demons only to find Dean has once again risked everything in a last attempt to protect her.

The List - After the reader realizes how much Dean actually cares about her she panics, knowing exactly what happens to hunters in love. So, she tries to leave, but not before Dean has anything to say about it.

Leave & Stay (Part One, Part Two) - After Dean and the reader’s messy falling out, he shows up on her motel door months later covered in blood and asking for help.

How to Love (Part One, Part Two, Part Three, Part Four, Part Five) - Set in the 2014end!verse, the reader has come to know Dean as a ruthless and heartless man. When 2009!Dean shows up and begins to treat her like he used to, with a kindness and compassion she hadn’t experiences in years, she has no idea how to handle it.

The Edge of Sanity (Part One, Part TwoPart Three, Part Four, Part Five) - The reader and the Winchesters are investigating a series of cases where perfectly ordinary people begin to have sudden mental breakdowns when the reader is kidnapped by the demon behind it all. She is put to the test when the demon continues to wither away her sense of reality.

Ghosts That We Knew - When the reader becomes possessed by the demon she has been hunting her whole life, she is forced to helplessly watch as the demon destroys the only thing in her life she ever truly cared for. Dean. 

Glances - Dean is blinded by a witch during a case as a punishment for his constant glances in (Y/n)’s direction to confirm her safety. Over the next week the severity of his circumstances begins to weigh on him. 

How It Ends (Part One, Part Two, Part Three, Part Four) - After Dean is fatally injured on a hunt, (Y/n) does the only thing she knows she can do to save him, sells her soul. She makes it her mission to keep Dean spared from the truth of what she did for him before the hellhounds come for her. 

Unspoken (Part One, Part Two) - Ever since Amara broke free, Dean has had no control over how he feels for Amara and finds that he is completely helpless to her every need when he’s face to face with her. (Y/n) tries to help sooth the guilt and shame he feels all while struggling with her own heartbreak.

Faded (Part One, Part Two) After a witch steals Dean’s memory of you, ten years of your life along side him is ripped away. In a desperate attempt to protect your heart, you beg Sam not to tell Dean about your relationship. You have sentenced yourself to watch in agony as Dean unknowingly breaks your heart.

Promise -  After a week of being tortured by demons, Dean finally rescues you only to find you far worse off than he could have imagined. As he raced you to the hospital, you’re plagued by a crippling fear he had never seen in you before and it’s breaking him apart. (Told from Dean’s perspective)

Requests (Oldest to Newest)

Karma - “Could you please write a one shot where dean & the reader go to a bar, get drunk, and the reader ends up being hit on and dragged out the bar by someone and dean kinda snaps out of his drunken state & comes to her rescue? [:” - anonymous

Poison - “could you do an imagine where sam and dean are drinking at the bunker and the reader gets kinda disappointed and sad bc she doesn’t drink? (her dad was an alcoholic or something?) maybe some fluff if you want? thanks! ily” - anonymous”

The Cost (Part One, Part Two) - After successfully avoiding the Winchesters for almost three years since her brother died at Dean’s hand, the reader runs into them on a hunt. (Y/n) and Dean are forced to work together and one secret that changed the corse of her life finally comes out. Based on a request by sidneyleanne13

Broad-Shouldered Beasts - After the death of a teenage boy the reader identified with beacause of their shared past, she breaks down for the first time and leaves Dean to help her pick up the pieces. Based on a request by scarecrow-is-fugly and Broad-Shouldered Beasts by Mumford and Sons. (tw: suicide attempt)

The Irony in Forgetting - “Could you please! please! Please! do a story where your boyfriend does not treat you right and dean protects you. Then you realize the only reason you were dating your boyfriend was to forget about dean and his one night stands… you figure that your boyfriend is the best you can do. Something like that please!! I love love love your blog!” -anonymous

The Last Call (Part One, Part Two) - Years after John forces the reader to walk out of Dean’s life, she finds herself bleeding out after a hunt gone wrong, alone, and desperate to hear his voice. So she calls Dean, using whatever time she has left, to tell him what she wished she had said all those years ago before she succumbs to her injuries. Based on a request by warrior-rain

Broken (Part One, Part Two, Part Three) - Following years of friendship, Dean and (Y/n)’s relationship turns into something more than either of them are willing to talk about aloud in fear of losing it. According to Crowley, Dean’s secret and undeniable affection for (Y/n) had softened him as a hunters. The King of Hell tracks down (Y/n) and gives her an ultimatum in order to get back the cold and remorseless hunter he requires out of the Winchester: break Deans heart, or be the reason he gets dragged back to hell.  Based on a request by miaislying

Find You (Part One, Part Two) - Dean and the reader are taken hostage by demons and held for days. Soon after you begin to fall dangerously ill due to an untreated wound, the demons drag you away while Dean is helpless but to watch, wondering if he’ll ever see you alive again. (Based off an anonymous request)

3

Dean has suffered more than Sam?

And does it actually matter/is it something we can even measure?

I take issue with many of the points OP brought up. I would never criticize the person who made this post, but I do strongly disagree with the content, and I’ll try to address the reasons why below. Thanks to the fantastic @eruthiawenluin, who brought the post to my attention. 

It’s near-impossible to quantify suffering. Both brothers have suffered; suffering is not a badge of honor but a fact of their lives. I’m not going to try to measure the levels of suffering each character has endured, because suffering can only be accurately measured by the person experiencing it.  We can only present facts, so I’m going to address the points of OP’s argument and why I disagree.

Beware: Potential fandom- and Dean-criticism.

Keep reading

Quick, he’s gone

“Quick, he’s gone!”, Dean shouts out, the minute his father has left the house.

Sam dashes out from behind the bathroom door where he was squirming impatiently, waiting for his brother to give him the signal. He’s butt naked except for his tight black boxer briefs. Dean is standing in the hallway, shirtless and hurriedly unbuttoning his jeans.

Despite having seen his brother naked nearly every day for a week now, Sam still stops in his tracks and stares. His eyes hungrily track Dean’s hands as he strips off his boxers and reveals his already hard and leaking erection.
The minute his underwear hits the carpeted floor, Sam is on him. Dean gasps as his younger brother’s mouth latches onto his fiercely and starts sucking on his lips like they’re juicy melons.

Huh, seems little Sammy needs to be reminded who’s in charge here. He grips both of Sam’s slender wrists in one hand and slams him against the opposite wall.

“I know you’re impatient baby, but you gotta let me enjoy this. I could barely sleep last night, thinking about your tiny pink hole and that sweet red cock of yours lying right beside me. God, if dad wasn’t home yesterday, I’d have sucked on those little treats all night long till you were screaming my name and begging me to sink my huge dick in your boy-pussy.”

Holy mother of God, Dean’s dirty talk was going to end him. Sam moaned wantonly and rubbed his tongue against the roof of Dean’s mouth. As revenge, Dean took his unoccupied hand and rolled his little brother’s nipple between his fingers.

“Please, Dean, please. More…, ” Sam gasped out, rutting shamelessly against Dean.

“Tch tch tch , baby. What are you supposed to call me when dad’s not home?”

“Daddy, daddyyy, please,” Sam begged. He loved calling Dean daddy. In reality, his father could never be as much of a parent figure to him as his older brother. Dean was the one who took care of Sam day in and day out. He was the only one who deserved being called by that name.

Dean loved it too, when his little quiet, nerd of a brother turned into this gasping, begging mess all for his older brother. He loved Sammy more than anything and he always gave him what he asked for.

He effortlessly picked up Sam and carried him to their bedroom, all while sucking relentlessly on his lower lip till it was red and swollen. He couldn’t help himself while his brother was grinding against his naked erection like it was his sole goal in life.

Opening the door with his foot, he dumped Sam on the bed and immediately sucked in a breath. God, his little brother, looked like sex itself. He was rutting against the sheets, desperate for some friction against his little erection. His mouth and nipples, red and abused.

All of Dean’s plans for taking his time, flew out the window and he lunged on top of Sam.

“Sammy, baby, you look so hot like this. Can’t wait to fuck you.”

“Yes, yes, daddy please. Want your cock so bad. Dreamt about it all night long,” Sammy gritted out while quickly removing his boxers. As soon as that last barrier was removed, Dean lunged.

He took on hard little nub in his mouth and sucked as hard as he could. Sam let out a high pitched whine and gripped Dean’s hair tight in both hands, as if to keep him stuck to his chest. Dean tugged on the nipple with his teeth before moving on to the next one and giving it the same attention.

He didn’t have any patience now and he licked his way downward till he reached Sammy’s swollen and leaking 5 inch erection. There was already some precome beading at the slit and Dean was desperate for a taste.

He dipped his tongue in the little opening and licked up his little treat. Sam let out another whine and forced his head downwards.

Dean slurped up his brother’s juices and took his entire cock in one go. Sam bucked up wildly and began babbling incoherently, “Ahh, aaah, daddyyy. Love your mouth, so wet and good on my little dick. Want more daddy, aaah”

Sammy made the most desperate little sounds and Dean could no longer ignore his throbbing erection. Without stopping his mouth, from where he was lightly sucking on the head, he fisted his cock and pulled upward. The relief had him moaning and sent little vibrations up Sammy’s little cock.

Dean sucked down the shaft slowly till he reached Sam’s cute little sacs. He took both the balls in his mouth together and sucked at the loose little scent. Sam cried out and pulled Dean’s hair harder.  

Sam smelled all innocent, even down there. His musky little patch of hair tickled Dean’s nose as he placed on more kiss to the tip before he abruptly pulled up Sam’s slender legs onto his shoulders and sucked on his furled pink pucker.

“Gonna eat this sweet ass, and you’re not gonna come until I tell you, can you do that for me, sweetheart?,” Dean asked sweetly while still madly tugging on his own dick.

“Yesss, daddy, please eat out my pussy. Love your mouth on my hole.”

Dean groaned loudly as he did every time his polite little brother started speaking like a whore. He took a minute to gaze at the tiny fluttering hole in awe before he ran his tongue in a broad swipe across the rim. Sam arched his back and let out a howl but Dean didn’t stop he sucked and licked till his spit was running down Sam’s hairless crack.

Gathering all those juices with an expert swipe he finally poked his tongue inside the tight ring of muscle and almost came right there.

God, he would never get used to how tight his little brother was. Despite getting fucked almost daily, his hole clung tightly to Dean’s tongue and his inner walls seemed ever smoother and hotter than Dean remembered.

“Jesus fuck. Daddy. Oh my god, do something. Please. Your tongue- oh fuck- it’s so good.”

Dean chuckled darkly before quickly sucking on his own fingers and inserting two at once with a primal grunt. Sam shrieked so loud, Dean was sure the neighbours could hear it. God, he couldn’t help but imagine how this slick heat would soon be wrapped around his erection.

A steady stream of precome erupted from his cock and he removed his fingers, ignoring Sam’s little whine of disapproval so he could scoop up his juices and taste them. Hmmm, he loved that salty, bitter taste.

He quickly re inserted his fingers and scissored them, wanting to be inside that little hole right the fuck now.

“So tight for me, baby. No matter how hard I fuck you, little slutty hole, always so desperate for my dick. Want you so bad,” Dean gasped out.

“Want you too, daddy. I’m ready, fuck me already,” Sam begged. And who was Dean to deny his little brother.

He removed his fingers, only to run them down his dick, mixing Sam’s juices with this precome to slick up his dick. He bent down to attack Sam’s mouth, moaning into it hungrily while he guided his dick to Sammy’ entrance.

As soon as his head breached the tight opening, both brothers let out a whine and Dean just couldn’t wait now. With a grunt he sunk in to the base, his heavy balls sitting snugly against Sam’s ass.

Sam whined impatiently and squirmed against his dick. “Do you feel me baby? Every inch of daddy? I’m gonna make you feel so good, Sammy. Fill you up with my seed, so everyone knows you’re all mine.”

Then, Dean started to move slowly in and out. Sam started meeting his brother’s shallow thrusts and then let out a high-pitched mewl when Dean bottomed out, hitting his prostate dead on.

“Yes! Daddy, oh! Yes- right there! Please! Ugh d-don’t stop!”

Oh, Dean had no intention of stopping. He slammed in again and again and the mouth watering sounds of skin on skin filled the room. Sam clenched his muscles and Dean cursed loudly before slamming in extra hard, driving Sam’s thin body further up the mattress.  Sam was snapping his hips violently back against Dean’s cock and begging on the top of his voice.

“F-faster daddy! Want you to come in my little hole till it’s dripping out. Please, aaaaah”

“You’ll come just on my cock, Sammy, gonna make you come just like this”, Dean replied as he angled his hips and slammed into the little bundle of nerves inside Sammy.

Sam let out a howl and painted his chest with thick ropes of come. The muscles of Sam’s ass contracted around his Dean’s cock, pushing him over the edge too. He let out a blissful groan as he felt his brother pump cum deep inside his body.

As much as Dean wanted to taste his cum, leaking out of Sammy’s hole, he was just too tired to move and he knew his Dad would be home from the garage soon for his lunch break.

Ahh, something for next time.

Golden Wings (GabrielxReader)

Request: Wing!kink with Gabe?

Warnings: Wing kink, Smut, Mild Violence

Thanks for the Request….I mean who doesn’t love a little wing action here and there? :)

Enjoy!

 

“A little help here?!” You shouted to one of the boys, but they were focused on the other demons surrounding you guys.

“Hold on.” Dean shouted back, as he drove a blade into a demon’s stomach. He twisted it then pulled out, drenched in blood. Dean was about to run over to help, but Gabriel appeared next to you. Suddenly the demons became unsure as the archangel zapped around, killing them off quickly.

One that was still free, yanked your hair back, making you fall onto the ground. Your weapon fell free from your hand as the demon leaned over with a glint in their eyes. The light faded as Gabriel grabbed their neck, using his grace to fry them. Gabriel wore a rare expression, one of complete rage. He didn’t seem to notice that his golden six wings were out, arching up to the ceiling of the factory.

As attention was focused on the wings, the rest of the demons scattered, leaving your group intact. Sam and Dean shielded their eyes at the bright wings, but you didn’t have a problem with them.

Gabriel finally calmed down, folding up his wings, taking in a deep breath. You were slightly sad to see them go as they were the most beautiful thing your eyes ever saw, besides of course, the archangel himself.

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His Guy

Originally posted by mostly-jensen

Amy’s 500 Celebration Party

Prompt: “You kissed a guy?”

Pairing: Dean x Y/n 

Characters: Y/n, Dean, Sam, Ash, Ellen, Jo

Warnings: Few swears, nothing much other than that. Fluff. Dean being cute and protecting his boo

Summary: Jo’s jealousy rears its ugly head when the Winchesters and Y/n visit Harvelle’s Roadhouse

Word Count: 2030

Tagged peeps: @faegal04 , @whywhydoyouwantmetosaymyname , @sallyp-53 @d-s-winchester @supernatural-jackles @winchesterreid@treasurecastiel @deanscherrypie @teamfreewill-imagine

Masterlist


Harvelle’s Roadhouse. A safe haven for hunters. A place to relax. Catch up. Meet others. But to Sam and Dean this was a second home. They’d been coming here for years after finding out about the Harvelles. They came back constantly, the Harvelles being like family.

The brothers walked in as everyone’s eyes turned towards the door at the noise.

“Dean. Sam. Oh my god. Finally. You boys have taken way too long to visit. I thought I told you no longer than 3 months before we see each other. It’s been almost a year” Ellen said, hands on her hips as she scolded the boys lightly.

Dean chuckled. “Yea sorry Ellen, it’s been crazy. Demons, Angels, Lucifer now its Leviathans. It’s a whole mess but we thought we should come see you guys again” he replied.

Just then, another man walked into the bar, a smaller man. You could tell he was a hunter based on the clothes he was wearing, but they seemed as though they were a bit too big for him, the flannel shirt and jacket he was wearing hanging off his body.

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The Demon Within

Originally posted by lord-of-the-feels

Summary: Demon Dean is holding reader hostage. Things take an interesting turn as reader reminds Dean of the people who love him.

Word Count: ~2,000

Warnings: mild violence, imprisonment

A/N: This is the first one shot I’ve ever posted, and I’m super nervous about it, but let me know what you think!


You groaned and opened your eyes, the squeal of the metal door pulling you from sleep. Your head and your stomach both ached; food and water weren’t exactly a regular thing these days. There was light coming through the tiny window set high in the wall, but that was really the only information you had about what time it was. You’d tried to keep track of the days, but you’d lost count after only a few. It had been at least a couple weeks of this hell.

You sighed, looking up into that familiar, handsome face that was twisted into a not so familiar expression. The red jacket threw you off, too, replacing the old beat up green one he loved so much. And the hair. The hair, you could live with. He’d somehow made it even better.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

If you get this, you have to rec your favourite fanfiction(s), and then send this message to five other people. Let's spread some love, writers deserve it!

Sounds good to me! :) I’m going to go with Destiel and Cockles fanfictions because that’s what I read the most. (and one Jimmy/Cas/Dean fic) Also, this might get pretty lengthy so bear with me. I’m not very good at picking only a few.


Hard Road (61k words):

Dean discovers a few truths about himself when he and Cas are forced to go undercover on a hunt to the very last place Dean ever thought he’d find himself: a gay resort, called “Last Hope”, geared towards failing homosexual relationships.

A Room of One’s Own (94k words):

All Dean wants is a little privacy. Cas doesn’t understand.

Past Present (83k words) // Not Available - Message me for PDF:

Dean/Castiel AU. When a handsome stranger wanders into his bar one warm fall night, Dean Winchester is charmed by the archaeology professor. As their friendship deepens, Dean will discover that there are a few simple truths about love: it can sneak up on you when you least expect it, and it will level you without warning. But it can also save you, when you’re lost.

Freefall (128k words):

Kindergarten teacher Dean Winchester spends his days elbow deep in play doh; the most exciting his life gets is when he plays mechanic in his uncle Bobby’s shop on the weekends. That is until a birthday party goes tequila-nova and he trips into a one-night stand with an incredibly hot firefighter named Castiel.

Painted Angels (105k words):

Author Castiel Novak has finally hit the big time, with a book based on his failed college relationship with a brilliant painter. He’s put all his pain behind him, but at a book signing, he comes face to face with Dean Winchester for the first time in twelve years, and the reunion doesn’t go like Cas hoped. Dean’s a broken man, with a lot of scars and secrets, shoulders weighed down by his demons and self loathing. Cas sees a second chance with the man he’s never stopped loving, but Dean’s moved on, and is about to get married. Sam launches a “brilliant” plan to reunite his brother and his best friend, but Cas is worried it will all blow up in their faces, and he’ll go through the agony of losing Dean a second time.

Porcelain (72k words):

High School AU ~ Dean Winchester has it all. He’s captain of the football team, a self-confessed ladies’ man and one of the most popular guys in school. But, is all of that about to change when he meets the mysterious Castiel Novak in an online chat-room?

A Home Beneath the Stars (71k words):

Castiel Novak is a young aspiring astronomy major, living on his own, far from his family for the first time. His life is a solitary one, that is, until he happens upon a man who will change it all. Meet Dean Winchester, who has, due to certain circumstances, found himself living on the streets, forced to beg for food, money, and the occasional odd job. Castiel decides to bring Dean to his apartment, giving him a chance at a single moment of comfort and safety. A friendship sparks between the two; will this lead to something other than just a one night act of charity?

The Breath of All Things (65k words):

Dean Winchester was twenty-six years old when a car accident killed his father and left him paralysed from the waist down. A year and a half later, Dean is in a wheelchair and lives in a care home in Kansas, where he spends his days waiting to die. It’s only when Castiel Novak starts volunteering at the care home that Dean starts to wonder if a changed life always equals a ruined one.

Pies and Prejudice (97k words):

Dean didn’t even want to enter this damn competition. He was happy with his life, more or less. It might not look like much from the outside, or to a younger brother headed towards a big time law career, but it wasn’t so bad that Dean needed to scrabble around for any opportunity to make a change – particularly not one as stupid as this. He’s going to throttle Sam the next time he sees him, for getting him involved in this ridiculous Bake-Off TV show. It’s bad enough that Dean has to cook in front of people he doesn’t know; he now has to go through the humiliation of being judged on it too. Its humiliation piled on humiliation, and to make matters worse Dean has to play nice with all the other suckers involved, like that rich dick-bag Castiel Novak. God, he hates that guy, and he hates that someone so awful has such a frustratingly fine ass.

Clean Air (121k words):

Centuries after the surface of the earth was devastated by an unknown disaster, the remnants of humanity live in a series of vast underground silos, each unaware of the existence of the others. For the inhabitants of Silo 34, the silo is the world, and the only world they know. Questions about the outside world are forbidden, and asking them is what got Dean Winchester’s parents killed. He isn’t even sure himself that they weren’t crazy. That all changes when he hears a voice on the radio – a voice from another world.

Misha’s Not in Vancouver Anymore (74k words):

An accident on set results in Misha ending up in the SPN!Verse and stuck with a confused and irritated Dean Winchester. Dean, Sam, and Castiel have to work together to find a way to send him back. Misha’s cheekiness brings to light the things that Dean only ever thinks about in the space between waking and dreaming.

Angel Slayer (138k words):

FBI Special Agent Jensen Ackles tracked a serial killer dubbed the Angel Slayer for six months in Washington, DC—the murderer was vicious, depraved, carved the names of angels into the victims’ chests…and eluded capture. Over eight years later, a murder in small Elton, NH has too many similarities for Jensen to ignore. Paired with a green agent, Jared Padalecki, Jensen travels to Elton to solve the case that has been haunting him for nearly a decade. In the course of the investigation the agents come across a local police officer named Misha Collins—who may have a deadly connection to the Angel Slayer.

Orpheus (84k words):

The club is Dante’s, the room is the Cage, and Dean is only there because he hates himself. He’s buzzdrunk from the shots he had at the upstairs bar, and dizzy from the heat. Ugly music thumps his bones, the juddering bassline overlaid with exactly the sort of discordant techno-trash he otherwise wouldn’t stomach in a fit. The Cage smells of sweat, sex and spilled beer, the tight space full of half- and near-naked bodies gyrating against each other and – shit, is that guy actually naked? He is, and the two men sandwiching him on the dancefloor look pretty pleased about it. Dean, in his jeans and tee, is practically overdressed, and as he stands there, equal parts aroused and ashamed, he has a brief moment of clarity. Get out. Go home. Stop punishing yourself.  Almost, he does. But through the din and crush, he suddenly feels eyes on him, and when he finds their owner, he remembers why he came.

Faith Healer (75k words):

Dean hates faith healers. Scam artists and power-hungry dicks, all of them. But with Sam nearing the end of his rope and desperate for a way to keep their father’s last words from being true, Dean has no choice but to turn to the enigmatic and irascible Castiel, more tattooed junkie than spiritual leader, in hopes of finding a way to cure Sam. Yet Castiel hides dangerous secrets, and Dean soon learns they have more to worry about than just Yellow Eyes and Sam’s growing demonic abilities. War is coming. Canon divergent after 2.10.

Take the Lead (59k words):

Castiel is one of the world’s biggest rock stars. Lead singer of The Garrison. He’s living a life of decadence, but he can’t come up with inspiration for their next album, and they’re supposed to be back in the studio in a matter of weeks. It’s no secret that The Garrison’s music is mostly about Castiel’s sex life, and the man experiments in lovemaking as often as he does with the band’s sound. Now, Cas needs a new sexual experience to inspire his music. Dean Winchester is a Mixed Martial Artist with a reputation for being able to take a hard hit and being able to deliver an even harder one. Having a fight in Vegas is surreal for the Kansas native. Being propositioned by a rock star after the fight is equally surreal. First of all, Castiel is decidedly male with a reputation with the ladies as sordid as Dean’s own. Second, his proposition to be at Dean’s mercy in the bedroom is as ridiculous as it is intriguing.

C-S-T-L (90k words):

It’s been nineteen years since the beginning of the Last War, and the Alliance Army is losing land faster than it can supply good men to defend it. Their hope is the synthesis of Android Angeles, a series of humanoid machines designed without the capacity to feel, and thus enabling them to be the perfect super soldiers. In order to check their battle suitability, the first prototypes are sent down with a landing party of the men they will later replace, and Sergeant Dean Winchester is paired with Unit 5284-C-S-T-L for the assignment. Cas, as Dean nicknames him, is easy enough to work with - once you get past the emotional vacancy and blatant disregard for human life, that is - but as the squad’s tour goes on, Dean gets to wondering whether the Android Angeles are really as unfeeling as he’s been told, or if the fear of a reality in which malfunctioning prototypes will be shut down is too great for them to exist any other way.

Love in the Wild (148k words):

When Sam decides it’s time for Dean to get his life together, he forces him onto a reality TV show. Supposedly a couple of weeks in the jungle with nineteen other hopeless people is all Dean needs to find “Love in the Wild.” Dean’s determined not to. It’s the principle of the matter. He hadn’t counted on meeting Cas, a down on his luck artist who’s only there to win the grand prize – a trip around the world. When Dean is saddled with him on the show, things immediately become complicated. Can the relationship they build in the jungles of Costa Rica survive in the outside world?

Red Right Hand (85k words):

It all starts with the mysterious note left on Dean’s chair. It all ends with Dean coming to terms not only with what he’s capable of, but how much that knowledge doesn’t bother him.

In the Weeds (40k words):

Dean knew, from the minute he laid eyes on Chef Castiel MacCarthy, the day would come that he would have to kidnap the man and dump the body in the darkest, dirtiest crack den in Ireland. Given that this was Dublin city, it wouldn’t be hard to find. Waiter!Dean and Chef!Castiel. Hate to love fic.

Thunder & Angels (54k words):

Castiel’s family owns the shoddily-regulated coal mine where John Winchester works, so Dean storms Cas’s mansion, demanding answers from the drugged-out trust-fund kid. In exchange for his help repairing the mine, Cas demands Dean live with him for three months and give Cas a shot at seducing him by allowing him one kiss a day.

Amnesia (77k words):

After an accident, Castiel finds himself with no memories of what has happened to him over the past nine years. Angels and humans live alongside eachother, however, their existence together can hardly be described as harmonious; and, as humans are agonisingly prone to doing, they oppress angelkind for their differences. Which is why Castiel is so disgusted with himself when he discovers that he has been married to one Dean Winchester, a human, for almost two years. As he attempts to gather his memories and understand the angel he has apparently become; he also finds himself, however reluctantly, falling in love with Dean Winchester, once more.

Bring it on Home (40k words):

Dean the Sales Rep just moved into the neighborhood, and his neighbor is a definitely crazy shut-in.

Kingdom Come (97k words) // Not Available - Message me for PDF:

Dean’s life is all work. He’s either at the bar that’s been left to him, serving drinks and cooking with his friend and partner Benny, or tinkering with prosthetic limbs. The rest of his life is one unhappy mess after another. Finding a stranger in the bathroom of his bar, after hours, doesn’t necessarily improve anything.

Revenge of the Subtext (80k words):

Things are finally settling back down to normal since Cas gave up his grace to cure Dean of the Mark. Well, as normal as their lives are allowed to get. Sam relentlessly finds new cases to work, one right after the other; but Dean thinks they need a break to let Cas have some purely human fun, for once. It’s true they had a difficult time readjusting to humanity at first, but Dean thinks Cas deserves to do more than ride around in the back seat and follow them on monster hunts. Then again, Dean’s a little bit scared to ask exactly what Cas would want, just in case it doesn’t include spending quite so much time with him. And with Sam (of course). Sam’s been tracking a series of odd occurrences in Laramie, Wyoming for the last few weeks that looks just enough like a case to finally convince Dean they should go check it out. Whether they like it or not, the goddess responsible for the weirdness in Laramie takes an immediate interest in the three less-than-perfectly-happy hunters who’ve stumbled into her town.

For All You Young Hockey Players Out There, Pay Attention (143k words):

Dean Winchester knows two things about hockey, two things his dad made sure he knew. One, hockey is a guy’s sport, and two, hockey is family. Hockey meant Sam and Bobby and Benny and Victor and Gabriel and hell, his entire team. So when Victor gets traded, Russian-star-turned-new-teammate Castiel Krushnic becomes a threat. As much as Dean hates him for that, the longer he sticks around, the more he begins to threaten that first rule too. Dean’s been taught his whole life that those who play hockey should not be captivated by deep accented voices and the way a guy handles his stick, so how the hell is he supposed to justify what he’s starting to think about Cas? All Dean wanted at the beginning of the season was to win, and now all he wants to do is figure out how he feels about Cas and how to deal with it without ruining his career and tearing his family apart.

Reconciling Hollywood (32k words):

Misha has always prided himself on his mastery of the first impression - both giving and receiving. After all, people are easy enough to read if examined through the appropriate lens. For the last two years he’s stuck to his guns and his assumption that Jensen is just a good guy who made a dick mistake back when he thought Misha was disposable. Pushed him up against a trailer door and took because he could. But now, with Jared overseas with his new bride, Jensen around more than ever, and a decision weighing heavy on his conscience, Misha realizes that truly knowing Jensen might be nearly as impossible as knowing himself.

The Complete Works of Emmanuel Allen (56k words):

Dean Winchester, reluctant business owner, reluctant home owner, and reluctant cat owner, is striking up a very promising friendship with the author of his favorite book series. And he has no idea.

To Raise a King (192k words):

This must be some kind of horrible joke at Castiel’s expense. Is he truly expected to protect a King? One who has been their enemy for as long as he can remember? He is much more suited to being a part of the army, or at the very least someone who helps to train the knights. That would be far more preferred than having to watch over the King. It means Castiel would get to keep fighting – and that’s the only way he knows to give meaning to his life.

Empty Spaces (50k words):

Dean is fine. The way he sees it, things are simple. He had a house and a family and food in his stomach, and now he doesn’t. And yeah, that’s a downer, but he’s not going to let that stop him from being fine, because he’s in control of the situation. He definitely doesn’t need anyone to save him. And it’s not like the weird guy with the nice butt from down the road is the knight-in-shining-armor type, anyway.

Satin and Sawdust (160k words):

When Castiel moves out of Jimmy’s house and into his own place for the first time, he saves money on buying a home by investing in a Fixer-Upper. He knows nothing about how to fix the many problems the house has, but he figures he’s smart enough to figure it out. Unfortunately it’s not too long before he learns that he’s way in over his head. Thankfully his new neighbor Dean is a handyman, and agrees to help him out. He knows Dean has a bit of a crush on him, but he’s not taking advantage of it, really. Dean’s a great guy, and quickly becomes a good friend. But a flash of satin under Dean’s toolbelt changes everything.

Pitchers and Catchers (123k words) (Dean/Cas/Jimmy):

In his entire career, from Little League to the pros, Castiel Novak has only ever pitched to his twin brother Jimmy Novak. When circumstances force him to need to find a new catcher, Castiel knows there’s no replacement for his brother…

Hostage Situation (30k words):

Cas Novak is a misfit soldier whose dream is to be a medic and devote his life to helping people. Unfortunately, he’s also a part of the Company, which puts greater emphasis and value on its soldiers fighting in the war against the Battalion and its most infamous and evasive sharpshooter, Dean Winchester. When the Company manages to capture him, Cas is stunned. He’s spent much of his life bearing witness to Winchester’s handiwork, and finally being in the presence of Winchester himself turns his world upside down.

Yellow (110k words):

Life had always been rough for long-time New Yorker, Castiel Haven. And when he ratted out his mob boss father, the rest of his horrific family, and about a half-dozen cops, he knew life wasn’t about to get better. Especially not when the FBI carted him off to the middle of nowhere, North Carolina. But he sure as hell didn’t expect the biggest complication to be a small-town brazen mechanic with a tenacious sex drive named Dean Winchester. One of them never lies. One of them never tells the truth. And both of them have no fucking clue what it means to love someone.

This got way longer than I had intended it to get. Please let me know if any of the links are broken and feel free to check my Fanfiction Recommendations Page for additional fics that I didn’t list here. ♥

The Heart Wants What It Wants

This is for @mamaredd123‘s 100 Followers Challenge.

Prompt: 1. Dean // 28. The Heart Wants What It Wants - Selena Gomez // “Demons I get. People is crazy!”

Warnings: Angst, smut - unprotected (wrap it up), fingering, oral female receiving - Dean being an absolute asshole.

Characters: Dean x reader (kind of), Sam, Jody (small cameo), Bobby (slight mention), Garth (slight mention).

Word count: 3,690

A/N: I wanted to take a break from my own followers celebration to get this done before the deadline, so here it is! Thanks mama! I wanted to do some angsty, not-happy fic and this was the best opportunity. Congrats on you 100, now +200 followers! You deserve every single one of them and more!

Enjoy!

You got me sippin’ on something
I can’t compare to nothing
I’ve ever known, I’m hoping
That after this fever I’ll survive
I know I’m acting a bit crazy
Strung out, a little bit hazy
Hand over heart, I’m praying
That I’m gonna make it out alive

His pearly smile was flashing, his forest eyes staring at the nice chick and that dirty blonde hair being stroked by said woman. Meanwhile, (Y/N) was back at the bar stool, pretending to listen to the boring conversation the man in front of her was holding. Of course, she only needed to look slightly over his shoulder to get a clear sight of Dean flirting with another one.

Her heart ached at the sight. She wanted to be in that woman’s place, she wanted to have Dean looking at her that same way. Her mind wandered, falling into a daydream where (Y/N) was the one in front of him, and Dean was holding her waist with one hand, while he used the other to lean against the wall. She felt his warm breath ghosting over her ear as he whispered sweet nothings. She could feel his green eyes staring deeply into her soul, and his plump lips reaching hers, slowly and without hesitation – just a few inches, maybe less. She craved for that moment. Her hands were sweaty and her heart pumped rapidly and…

“So?” The man asked, taking (Y/N) out of her trance and back into reality.

“So…?” She furrowed. Slowly, her whole body sunk back into reality. The man had already a hand over her bare leg, and he had leaned forward just enough to break in her personal space.

“So what do you say we go back to my place?” He wiggled his eyebrows.

(Y/N) stayed quiet for a bit. Yes, the man in front of her was really good looking, but he was nothing compared to Dean. His blue eyes were dull in comparison to the mysterious green that Dean had; his dimpled smile wasn’t as stunning as Dean’s and, of course, he wasn’t as much of a bad boy as Dean was, and that was the exact problem.

During her lifetime, every woman – or man, if that’s the case – will find a bad boy that steals that person’s heart. It’s like a divine rule. Sadly, for (Y/N), the man was Dean and he was the worse out of the worse. He was a criminal, even if he was the Robin Hood type, and he had killed more people than she dared to count; he was an alcoholic and a hustler. His own self-loathing had turned him into a machine that buried his own feelings so deeply inside that a relationship with him was impossible to get.

And yet, (Y/N) would fantasize about him. She wanted a fairy tale… The typical were the good girl falls for the bad boy, and he falls for her and changes… But in modern days, fairy tales don’t have happy endings.

“Yeah, let’s go.” She faked a smile. The man rubbed his hands together in anticipation and then guided her out. (Y/N) nodded towards Dean – they had gotten to the bar together, so she had to let him know she was leaving with someone else – and Dean nodded back to her before returning his gaze back to the voluptuous woman in front of him.

Maybe it was that. (Y/N) wasn’t precisely a top model. Dean looked like he was hand-made by the Gods, so of course he looked for women as hot as him. (Y/N), on the other hand, would look for not-so attractive men but rather men with at least a bit of brains, and it was fine.

She had a few scars due to her time hunting, but that had been a long while ago and now, she had turned into a Garth or Bobby. She would sit at her huge house all day, doing research, answering phone calls and pretending to be different government departments. She would receive hunters and give them a place to crash. She would feed them and heal their wounds and in exchange, they would do all kinds of favours. She also worked as a free-lance sci-fi writer, using the stories every hunter told her to write her own. “If only people knew that this is based in reality…” She would say as the hunters laughed whilst they rested from their hunts.

Even when she stayed at home all day, she wasn’t the kind of girl to get her nails manicured each week, or one to put on makeup every day, less to say to fix her hair… She was more of a natural beauty, even though she convinced herself every day that she wouldn’t beat any of Dean’s sluts.

The morning after that night, (Y/N) escaped from the man’s apartment just like she escaped from any beast that threatened her life; although, of course, she was rather silent with humans. She didn’t leave a note, or her phone number and she definitely wasn’t willing to see him again. The only man she would wish to wake up with for the rest of her life was Dean, and he didn’t want to wake up next to anyone but himself.

She had met Dean at a hunter’s meeting. They were at yet another hunter’s funeral, and even when she was heartbroken, she couldn’t help but to get astonished by the man in front of her. He was just the right kind of tall, unlike his brother who looked like a giraffe, and his manly factions and rough voice were just too perfect for her not to fall. Because she did, she fell in love with Dean Winchester the minute she laid eyes on him.

Of course she offered her home to them, but they only crashed thrice in the past five years. However, those three times were more than enough to make the Winchesters trust her enough for her to be an ally. They would use her number at their FBI cards, and if they needed help, they would call her without further hesitation. But that was about it, she was just an ally.

In those years, Sam and Dean died many times. At first, (Y/N) would cry for three nights in a row, unable to believe that they were gone; but after having them come back more than once, she learned to pray for them to come back fast, thinking that Dean would change during that time and that he would finally feel like settling down – but instead, Dean built a bigger and taller barrier each time he came back.

(Y/N) thought he was cute and ‘so caring’ because he was worried to get a family and then die, unable to be with them, like his mom; at least that’s what Sam told her. But she was certain that, if Dean settled with her, she’d find a way to keep him alive enough time for them to grow their kids together.

“So, had fun last night?” Sam asked as she entered her house. The Winchesters were staying there while they solved a case in town.

“Yeah, I had a blast.” She replied sarcastically. Sam chuckled, giving her a knowing look.

No, he wasn’t her best friend and he definitely didn’t know about her massive crush on Dean; but he was also a hunter, and he had been in love once, so he kind of felt empathy for her when it came to dating and getting off on strangers.

“Have you tried meeting people in social media?” Sam inquired.

“You mean Tinder?” She sat next to him, stealing a sip from his coffee. “Yes, and it’s worse.”

“Is that so?”

“Yes, because at least at the bar I can pick the hot guy and be sure he’s hot. In Tinder, they show you a Brad Pitt and when you meet in real life he turns out to be Danny Trejo.” Sam let out a laugh loud. “I’m serious, Sam… I just wish I could find someone I like to settle down.” Someone like your brother.

“In this life, that’s hard to get… You might as well look for a hunter.” If only Sam knew that she was, in fact, in love with a hunter.

“I don’t know any hunter cute and smart enough.” Sam frowned, looking down for a second as his smile faded.

“Have you tried going to hunter’s meetings more often?” He asked.

“I’m too busy answering the five different phones to go out to every single meeting.” Sam smirked slightly.

“Then you’re screwed.” He joked, “You might as well settle with one of the hunters you know.”

“The hunters I know don’t want to settle.” She mumbled, looking down at her fidgeting hands.

“I do.” Sam stated, “And Mike does too, and I think Tom… I don’t know, but I’m sure more than one wants to.” (Y/N) smiled at him, not really getting the signs. She palmed his knee and got up; heading into the shower to get rid of the smell of the man she spent the night with.

Sam and (Y/N) continued to do some research for the rest of the day, and it wasn’t until 5 that Dean stormed through the door.

“Freaking humans!” He roared. He had a long cut on his cheek and his fists were bleeding.

“What happened?” (Y/N) and Sam asked in unison. The girl got up from her seat in the living room, immediately holding Dean’s hands in hers, checking the wounds.

“It’s not a monster; it’s a bunch of psychotic humans thinking this is fun!” Dean explained angrily.

“Did you kill them?” (Y/N) inquired with concern.

“Of course not! But I wish I did. You never know what’s their next move.” Dean huffed, “Demons I get. People are crazy.

“We know.” Sam breathed out a chuckle.

While the younger Winchester offered to go get dinner, and probably go to the police station, (Y/N) took Dean upstairs and started healing him, in spite of his complaints.

It was the first time (Y/N) was that close with him for that long. Dean would usually leave a peck on her temple when they met and that’s it; Sam, on the other hand, would hug her and (Y/N) couldn’t help but to wish Dean did the same.

He had a few cuts on his torso, which led him to take his shirt off. It took all of (Y/N)’s self-control not to drool right there. She took her sweet time to cure him, whilst Dean told her all about his day.

She stopped listening soon after. Her eyes were focused on his wounds as her mind travelled to another reality where Dean wasn’t hurt because he had gotten back home with her, instead of that psycho-woman. She imagined him kissing every inch of her body as her hands travelled all the way down from his shoulders to his hips; she imagined his voice moaning her name, his plump lips crashing against hers as he filled her completely, stretching her walls and finally becoming hers.

“Sweetheart, are you okay?” Dean asked.

“Yeah, why?” She smiled, shaking away the thoughts of him buried deep inside of her.

“You’ve pressed that cloth in the same spot for the past five minutes.” Dean chuckled, pointing at the alcohol dipped cloth she was using to clean his wounds.

“Sorry, I’m a little distracted.” She explained as a light blushed reeked her cheeks.

“Was last night too distracting?” Dean wiggled his eyebrows.

“Nope, it was the exact opposite.” She sighed heavily.

Dean chuckled lightly. “Hunters live in such and adrenaline that being with a regular person feels boring.”

“You’re such a philosopher.” She joked.

“I’m serious.” He smiled, “I think you need a hunter to give you what you need rather than some boring American Eagle reject.”

“He was an architect, actually.”

“That’s worse, then.” They breathed out a laugh.

“So, which hunter do you think can give me what I need?” She asked in a sly flirty tone.

“I can do that.”

And that’s how every fantasy she had ever had become true. Even so, Dean was better than she could imagine, leaving her fantasies as some lame-ass dreams that were nothing compared to what the real Dean could do.

His lips captured (Y/N)’s in a hungry kiss, sucking and biting her lower lip until they could both taste her blood. Then, he moved down to her neck, nibbling on the soft skin, biting and making sure that she kept those hickeys for at least ten days. His hands travelled all over her body, removing whichever piece of clothing they found in the way.

She was fully naked in front of him. Dean stared in awe for a couple seconds, licking his lips in anticipation. Without further announcement, he buried two fingers between her folds. She was wet and aching for him, moaning his name and arching her back.

Dean’s mouth went down as well. He sucked on her clit, tracing circles on it with his tongue as his fingers pumped inside and out of her. And so, her orgasm reached faster than any of them expected.

Dean fingered her out of her orgasm and then took his digit out, licking them before stripping off. She tried to reach him, touch him; but Dean was willing to give her the pleasure she needed, and so he pinned her hands up her head, pressed against the pillow.

He spread her legs by using his knee and then got in place, her legs framing his hips. He thrusted deeply into her, filling and stretching her completely. He was bigger than she expected, and couldn’t help but to groan loudly when he thrusted into her.

Dean moved fast and hard, pressing her sweet spot over and over again, making her dizzy. She clenched around him, making him moan as well. His pace turned faster each time. The bed’s springs squeaked under them as the header of the bed hit the wall with each thrust.

(Y/N) came twice, each one harder than the other, and then Dean followed. Their juices mixing, dripping between them, as Dean fell on top of her. They were both tired and satisfied.

Her lips ended up plumped and dry, their skin was sticky with sweat, her neck had marks all over and her core ached. (Y/N)’s throat was sore, her hair was a tangled mess and she felt too tired to do anything else. A smile grew on her face as Dean’s eyes met hers.

“Do you see my point now?”

“Oh yeah.” She breathed out, “Hunters are better.”

They had a small talk before drifting off to sleep next to each other.

The bed’s getting cold and you’re not here
The future that we hold is so unclear
But I’m not alive until you call
And I’ll bet the odds against it all
Save your advice ‘cause I won’t hear
You might be right but I don’t care
There’s a million reasons why I should give you up
But the heart wants what it wants
The heart wants what it wants

She woke up to an empty bed. His warmth was still there, but it was slowly fading and turning cold. He had left her just like he left every other woman he slept with; she couldn’t change him, he couldn’t get him to stay, but how could she if they only had sex?

She got up, putting her own clothes instead of his shirt like she had dreamed once, and walked downstairs. Sam wasn’t in his room either, but at least he had left a note that read: “We had to run, I’m sorry. Thanks for everything. ;)”

Sam, so caring and attentive, unlike his brother. Sam, the one who actually wanted to settle at some point, unlike his brother. Why couldn’t she fall for him instead of falling for Dean?

She waited Dean’s call for days. She wanted him to explain why he left, to tell her he’d drive by to say hi at least. She wanted him to promise her to come back, to return to her arms and stay by her side. But then again, he was Dean Winchester, and no fairy tale involving him would ever get a happy ending.

She finally gave up, and it wasn’t until a year later that she finally met the Winchesters again. The mere sight of Dean made her heart beat fast again. She hadn’t stopped loving him, craving his touch, and having him back in front of her was like a dream come true.

“Dean.” She breathed out.

“Hi, sweetheart.” Dean replied nonchalantly, leaving the usual peck on her temple like nothing had happened.

“(Y/N).” Sam hugged her tightly, “I missed you, how are you?”

Of course, Sam was the one to ask that. Sam was the one to say the ‘I miss you’ line, to smile and listen as she gave him a lame resume of her life in the past year. Sam and not Dean.

The day went by. They were at another funeral, and at that point it felt like funerals were the only place where she’d meet Dean ever again. A few hunters left early, some other got drunk before ten and soon, the only ones sober enough to talk were Sam, Dean, Jody and a guy named Frank.

Jody, Frank and Sam got into a heated argument on what was the best thing to kill a Wendigo, leaving Dean no other choice but to start a conversation with (Y/N).

“So, how’s life?” He asked.

“You mean after you left without saying good-bye?” She spoke sassily, “Oh good, I’ve been sitting around and writing about monsters and stuff. You know the usual.”

“I didn’t call because I didn’t find it necessary.” Dean grumbled uncomfortably.

“You didn’t find it necessary?” She lifted an eyebrow.

“Yes. Because we’re nothing.” Dean hissed, “You’re just another girl I had sex with.”

“Right, because I’m just a stranger you can forget and not the one that always saves your ass when people don’t believe you’re an FBI agent, or the one that does some extra research when Sam is too busy to do it. Or yet, the one that offers you and Sam a place to crash whenever you need it!” By then, Sam, Jody and Frank had stopped arguing and they were staring at (Y/N) and Dean, who were too much into their own problem to care for the rest of the people in the room.

“So what?” Dean roared, “Just because you do that doesn’t mean I have to give you extra credit!”

“You treat me like any other girl when I’m…”

“And you treat me like any other hunter!” Dean interrupted, “Except of course we had sex.”

“You’re an asshole.”

“And you’re not the first chick to tell me that.” Dean winked at her, “Did you really think I would suddenly transform into some lame-ass chick-flick guy?” He laughed cruelly, “That’s just… That’s sad.”

(Y/N) slapped him so hard her hand got printed in his cheek; then, she stormed out of the house, trying to hold her tears back until she was far in enough from him. Sam followed her outside as Jody took charge of Dean, giving him the mom-look to which he rolled his eyes and shrugged his shoulders.

You got me scattered in pieces
Shining like stars and screaming
Lighting me up like Venus
But then you disappear and make me wait
And every second’s like torture
Heroin drip, no more so
Finding a way to let go
Baby, baby, no, I can’t escape

(Y/N) was outside, leaning against one of the trees that served as barriers to protect the house. Tears streamed down her face, turning her into a mess. Sam didn’t lose time, he held her tightly, offering a shoulder to cry on.

“He’s an asshole.” He would say, and even when that was the truest statement ever, she still loved him. Her heart couldn’t beat for someone other than Dean freaking Winchester and that was even more painful than anything he had said.

“Why did I have to fall for him, Sam?” She cried.

The heart wants what it wants, (Y/N).” Sam sighed sadly.

“I just wish we loved the person who loves us rather than loving the one who doesn’t.” Sam breathed out.

“If that happened, you’d love me as much as I love you instead of crying over my brother.” He whispered.

(Y/N) looked up at him. His puppy eyes were sad, almost as sad as hers and yet a tender smile was on his lips. He loved her, and she couldn’t love him because her heart was taken by the wrong guy. She was shattered, turned into pieces and the only one capable of building her back was the same guy that broke her apart. Why couldn’t she stop loving Dean?

“I’m sorry.” She breathed out. Sam held her hands in him, bringing them up to leave a soft kiss in them.

“It’s fine.” He smiled at her, and even when his eyes were watery, he stayed strong for her.

This is a modern fairytale
No happy endings
No wind in our sails
But I can’t imagine a life without
Breathless moments
Breaking me down, down, down, down

Dean came out of the house, getting Sam and (Y/N)’s attention. The older Winchester gestured for Sam, who gave her a silent good-bye before joining his brother. The Winchesters got inside the car and drove off. (Y/N) spilled a few more tears as she watched the black ’67 Chevy Impala driving away from her.

And so, the Winchesters disappeared from her life. (Y/N)’s heart would still beat for Dean, and so she would dream, pray for the day when Dean decided to go back to her, to start over again. She would imagine him walking through the door and straight towards her, holding her in a tight hug and crashing his lips against hers. But that day never came.

The heart wants what it wants, baby
It wants what it wants, baby
It wants what it wants
It wants what it wants

Sam Winchester-Wedding from hell

Title: Wedding from hell

Pairings: Sam Winchester x reader, Sam Winchester x Becky

Word count:1942

Request:Can I have a request based off of the episode where Sam marries Becky. They were both dating before but after that he told her “I don’t need you anymore, I love Becky.” Then she runs off without a word not even telling Dean. She began to hunt alone then Sam went to look after her. He went to her family (she’s from a family of hunters) and they tell him she died on demon hunt. What they don’t know is that she went to hell and became a demon (not a very bad one though. She still tortures.)

A/N: This isn’t exactly like the episode so I’ll be making up what they say x

‘’No way!’’You laughed, tilting your head back as you clapped your hands together. Dean chuckled, nodding as he tried to wipe the huge grin off his face but laughed anyway.

Dean’s phone buzzed, vibrating loudly on the oak wood as the brightly lit screen flashed in front of the pair of you. You gulped back your shot before glancing at Dean with a questioning look.

‘’911. It’s from Sammy. Say’s to wear our Fed suits as well’’Dean mumbled under his breath, brows drawn in on each other as his eyes flashed across the screen before glancing up at you.

You both looked at each other before rushing home and getting into your agent outfits.

******************************************

You jumped into the Impala, gun bending into the waistline of your jeans as you nervously tapped your slender fingers against your knee caps.

‘’he’s going to be okay, (y/n). I’m sure he’s fine’’Dean reassured, squeezing your hand before gripping the steering wheel and pressing harder down on the ignition.

You stalked down the cold abandoned halls, gun in hand as your finger itched ready to pull the trigger. A loud bang sounded and Sam came bursting through the door, fed suit on but a ….flower? nestled into his front pocket.

You sighed in relief, completely deciding to ignore the flower as you leaped into his arms, wrapping them around his frame. It was familiar and comforting, something you had done all the time but then Sam did something he never di.

Sam looked awkward and nervous, prying your arms off as he pinned them back by your side before awkwardly patting your shoulder. You looked at hi hurt and confused before Sam put Dean’s gun into his pocket.

‘’Won’t be needing that’’Sam smiled happily, plucking a flower from the vase and sticking it into Dean’s pocket.  The flower was delicate and beautiful but Dean didn’t seem to think so as he did a double take, staring down at it before it hit him.

‘’Are we doing a wedding?’’Dean asked, brows furrowed before smirking. ‘’We gonna crash  it?’’

‘’No Dean’’Sam grinned, rubbing his hands on his trousers. ‘’It’s my wedding’’.

‘’Yours?! (y/n), you’re getting married?! I mean finally… but why didn’t I know!’’Dean yelped surprise marking his soft features.

‘’I didn’t know either!’’You yelped back, eyes wide. Sam shook his head, brow locks sprawling about as he smiled sympathetically at you.  

‘’I’m not marrying (y/n)’’Sam stated.

‘’YOU’RE NOT!’’You and Dean yelled in sync. Sam shook his head before sighing in awe as he looked straight ahead. You and Dean both followed his eyes to see a woman making her way down the isle, Vail hiding her identity.

You glared at  her, jaw gritted and eyes narrowed ready to pummel her to the ground. Dean spotted your reaction and slipped your gun out of your pocket. ‘’No shooting people’’Dean whispered.

‘’BECKY!’’You both cried when she removed the vail. Your face turned to hurt and horror as you lashed out slapping her cheek.

‘’HEY!’’Say yelled, hand shoving you backwards into Dean which caused him to yell Sam caressed Becky’s cheek, glaring at you with hate as he kissed her cheek softly. Your eyes welled up, heart shattering as Sam turned to face you, Becky’s hand in his own as she stood smirking behind him.

‘’I don’t need you any more, (y/n). I’m in love with Becky. I’m getting married to her whether you like it or not’’Sam said, trying to remain calm but his voice was loud. Sam winced as if something was off and Becky noticed too and you could have sworn panic flooded her eyes.

‘’You don’t need me any more?’’You whispered, heart broken. Dean watched the scene shock and horror marking his features as he watched Sam stupidly throw away his true love.

*****************************************************

‘’(Y/n)! please don’t go! Sammy’s just.. gone crazy, so we throw him in a asylum and he get’s better!’’Dean pleaded as he took your folded clothes out of your bag.

‘’No Dean!. He made it clear he didn’t need me. Now you tell me if the love of your life get’s married to someone else that you’re going to stick around, Dean. Go on, Tell me!’’You yelled, taking your anger out on Dean as you threw your clothes back in, not caring if they weren’t folded.

Dean was silent but instead helped you pack. He stood by your car, eyes watery as he gave you a final hug.

‘’You sure this is what you want to do?’’Dean whispered. You nodded against his shoulder before giving him a peck on the cheek and pulled back.

‘’Dean, could you do something for me please?’’You whispered, tears soaking into your skin. Dean nodded, squinting his eyes to stop the harmful ray of the sun that shielded his vision.

‘’Anything’’He replied.

‘’Tell Sammy I love him. S’all I want. Just let him know that I’ll always love him’’You sniffed before climbing into your car. You didn’t glance back knowing if you did you probably wouldn’t want to leave.

This was for the best.

********************************************************

‘’You made a deal with a demon!’’Sam yelled, eyes wide as he pulled on the restraints that kept him close to the headboard of the bed. He growled rolling his head as he let it flop against the pillow.

Sam’s head shot up, eyes widening as he cried out your name before glaring at Becky. ‘’(y/n)!’’Sam whispered quietly, closing his eyes almost like he was in physical pain. 

‘’You don’t need her. Look how easily it was for her to leave! She obviously doesn’t love you as much as I do!’’Becky cried, hand grasping Sam’s tied up one who gritted his teeth at her. 

‘’She left because she wanted me to be happy! That’s love. Doing something that hurts you but makes the other happy!’’Sam growled, tugging harder on the ropes. 

********************************************

‘’Are you sure you want this?!’’Becky nagged, gripping tighter on to the divorce sheets. Sam huffed, breath pulling in as he narrowed his eyes into small slits. Dean bit back a laugh, stomach folding in on itself as his eyes creased together. 

Sam glared at his older brother before scribbling his signature on the papers. Becky sighed, holding them close to her heart as she nodded glumly. 

********************************************

‘’She’s gonna hate me Dean.’’Sam grumbled, sighing tiredly as he rested his head against the glass of the Impala. Dean glanced over at his brother, eyes flicking between him and the road. 

‘’No she won’t. This is (y/n), she’ll probably just tease you for having a ex wife’’Dean chuckled. 

‘’I broke her heart, Dean!’’Sam yelped, shooting up to strength his cry to his brother as he flopped back down in his seat. 

‘’We’ll you can explain it, we’re here’’Dean nodded towards the small familiar house. Sam sighed, breath fogging the window as he trod down the gravelled trek and came up to the wooden oak door. 

Dean nodded at Sam. Sam gulped, hesitating before closing his eyes to take out a deep breath before bringing his knuckles up and rapping at the door. Sam’s heart pounded in his chest as Dean grinned, wiggling his brows as he whacked his brothers arm. 

Sam shook his head at the sound of footsteps, ‘’That’s not (y/n)’s footsteps’’Sam added, shaking his head as his brown locks shook about. Dean’s brow creased together as he looked at Sam in bewilderment. 

‘’You know what her footstep’s sound like……’’Dean cringed, looking at Sam like he was mad. ‘’You know what her footsteps sound like?!’’Dean repeated in shock. Sam narrowed his eyes as he sighed, huffing out a breath. 

‘’Well, she has fast quiet footsteps. These are loud and slow’’Sam shrugged. Dean rolled his eyes muttering something under his breath as the door creaked open. 

When a large man came into view Sam turned to Dean with a smug face before his pleading eyes came back. ‘’Is (y/n) here?’’Sam asked, voice hopeful, quieter than a whisper. 

‘’(y/n)?’’The man whispered, hand ruffling what was left of his hair. ‘’Y-you mean you don’t know, Sam?’’

‘’Know what!’’Dean barked, turning to Sam with a worried expression. 

‘’Boy, you better come in’’He grumbled, stepping aside to let in the Winchester brothers. Both brothers stepped in. warmth and comfort hitting them as the door creaked closed behind them. 

******************************************************

‘’So (y/n) just turns up here out of the blue sobbing. She doesn’t tell us what happens, and at first she’s the saddest we have ever seen her’’Your mother informed, fumbling with her fingertips. 

Sam looked down, guilt spreading along his features as he nodded. ‘’Then she started to get really angry.’’Your dad added, shuffling back in his chair. 

Your mother nodded, looking between the brothers as she sighed. ‘’(Y/d/n) tried to stop her but she was out of hand.’’Your mother cried out in protest. Your father nodded as he rubbed his face tiredly. Stress pulling at him.

‘’She went on all kind of hunts. Killed anything that got in her way. But…’’He trailed off, looking away. 

‘’but what?!’’Sam pried, fingertips digging into the thick velvet of the couch. 

‘’She died.’’Your mother whispered. 

Those two words made everyone’s hearts drop. Sam stood up so quick that the chair knocked over backwards. Dean shot up, ignoring his own pan and rushed towards his younger brother. 

‘’Sam!’’Dean grunted, gripping his elbow but Sam just ripped it from his grip shaking his head as he mouthed the word ‘no’. Sam placed his hand on his chest, breathing raspily as he tried to take deep breaths. 

He stumbled out of the living room, crashing into everything. 

Dean had been outside looking around for his brother for ages. He checked the Impala, checked the nearest motel and shops. He couldn’t find him anywhere, until it hit him. 

Dean stopped the Impala, his fingers gripped the wheel tighter as he closed his eyes. He knew where Sam was. 

*****************************************

‘’Oh Sammy’’Dean muttered quietly to himself as he walked further into the room. Why had he thought Sam left the house? He should have known Sam would have gone to your room. 

Dean felt the salty tear hit him with sadness as he watched his younger brother lie with his stomach flat on your bed, head resting on your pillow as he clutched desperately at your pillow. 

His eyes were closed, face scrunched up in pain and sadness as he took heavy breaths through his mouth because he had been crying so much. He had stopped sobbing and was now silently crying.

‘’Sam’’Dean choked, voice breaking with the single word. Sam shook his head, grasping tighter to the pillow as he sniffed loudly. 

‘’No, no, no, no’’Sam whimpered, voice broken reminding Dean of his five year old brother. ‘’She’s gone and it’s all my fault’’

‘’It’s not your fault.’’Dean snapped angrily. ‘’I let her go just as much as you did. It wasn’t you who did this, Sammy. It was those demons!’’

Sam pried one eye open, shocking Dean with how red and bloodshot it was. Dean sat on the end of your bed as he patted Sam’s back gingerly. 

‘’We’ll save her, Sammy’’He promised. 

‘’I know we will’’

*********************************************************

‘’(Y/N)!’’

‘’What!’’You snapped, jaw gritting as you sat crossed legged on the murky grey floor. The tall man entered, grinning a sickly grin as you turned your head back to face him. 

‘’We have another victim for you’’He breathed out in awe. 

‘’What are we waiting for then’’You whispered, as your eyes flashed a manic black. 

‘’Let’s get back to business’’ 

Home

Hello My Lovelies,

For ease of access please find below links to all my previous stories.
Masterlist

Regards,
Bec
Xxx
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I had another idea maybe it could a series or a single story I would love to write but your a million times better than me so here it is; the reader has been with the winchesters since the beginning and is in love with Dean but has not said anything about it and just disappears during the to hunt on her own and figure out who she is as a person (she’s 30) Dean finally realizes how much he loves her and drops everything to find her based on the song heart of gold by Neil Young
http://youtu.be/Eh44QPT1mPE


Let me know what you think
😋 @msimpala67

Authors Note: Here you go Hun. xxx

WORD COUNT: 4600

Y/N watched as Dean flashed a smile and a wink at the blonde who was sitting at the bar, gesturing for Dean to come over.

Dean downed his beer at grinned at the two hunters he was about to leave behind, before standing and walking casually over to the woman, gently resting his hand on her knee as he spoke huskily. Tonight was going to be a good night.

Sam watched as Y/N averted her eyes down to her drink and just sat there quietly.

‘You ok?’

‘Yeah.’

‘You don’t seem it. You haven’t for a while.’

‘I’m fine Sammy.’

‘Y/N,’ Sam sighed.

She wasn’t ok, he knew her as well as he knew himself. Probably better. But then again, it was to be expected. She’d been with the boys for, what was it now…15 years, no… 20. For 20 years they had lived, breathed and hunted together. She was his best friend and the only one that supported him in moving to Stanford, the one who he kept in contact with. The only one he told about Jess. She was his big sister and the Mother he never had.

‘Do you think we are too old for this?’

‘Drinking in a bar, watching Dean get lucky?’

Y/N barely cracked a smile.

‘Hunting. Do you think we will ever hit that point where we are too old and we find a white picket fence and just do the leg work like Bobby does?’

‘You make it sound like we’re old Y/N.’

‘I am old.’

‘You just hit 30, that’s not old.’

Y/N’s eyes rose up, and she caught Dean’s face as he watched her. His frown only deepened when he saw her eyes. She watched as he silently questioned if she was ok. She gave him a small smile and turned her attention back to Sam.

The three of them knew each other well enough, that words were barely necessary at times.

‘30’s old for a hunter.’

‘Can’t argue that.’

‘Maybe it’s time we all went to Stanford,’ she said quietly.

She felt Sam looking at her questioningly. She knew her last comment didn’t make much sense. Not to him anyway. But to her, it may be the answer.

Dean watched Y/N for a few more minutes, something was wrong. It had been for a while but she wasn’t talking. It had only lead to arguments when he pushed. He hated secrets. Secrets lead to bad things happening, family dying. He wasn’t having that. Not when there was so few left. He excused himself from his date, telling her he’d meet her at the billiard table.

He walked over to the table, watching Y/N the whole time.

‘You good?’ he asked sitting down.

‘Always.’

Dean looked at Sam, trying to get confirmation. He knew Sam had noticed things too. He was met with a shrug.

‘I think you’re wanted.’

Dean watched as the blonde came over. He was quickly losing interest, normally it would be fine. He’d hit on them, make his move, go back to their place, have sex and go home. But the last few times, it’s been different. He tried talking to them, actually talking. And he realised he had a type, when he picked up. Stupid. No, he thought eyeing off the blonde. Not stupid, but he liked the conversations that challenged his thinking, ones that were about all and nothing and yet could carry on for hours. He watched Y/N as she downed her beer. Ones he used to have with Y/N.

‘I’ll catch you two tomorrow. I’m going to crash.’

‘Want me to drive you?’ Dean offered.

Y/N shook her head and watched as the blonde sat in Dean’s lap.

‘Baby, I thought we were going to play some pool,’ she purred.

‘Have fun you two,’ Y/N said sadly, standing up.

She took another glance at Dean as he ran his hand up the blondes back and walked out through the door. Stopping to take in the cool fresh air.

She walked back to the motel slowly. She had to admit she liked nights like this. It was quiet, the crisp air hit her cheeks. It wasn’t enough you needed to rug up, but it reminded you Winter is coming. She smiled at the Game of Thrones reference that popped into her head. Mentally reminding herself she needed to watch the next episode. The night was the sort that reminded you that soon there would wood fires, hot chocolate, oversized sweaters, fuzzy slippers and extra blankets.

Y/N sighed, when she remembered, soon it would be non of that. Just cold motel rooms, frozen pipes, lack of blankets, and prayers that things like Wendigo’s didn’t pop up on the hunting radar.

She let herself into her room, resting against the door as she locked it. What had happened to her? To her love for the family business? Her eyes flicked to the lock screen on her phone as she put it on the table. That’s what happened.

Dean. She had been in love with him forever. 19 years, give or take. She got what women saw in him when he picked them up at the bar. The peppermint crisp eyes, the short hair, tall stature with a bad boy attitude. It was hot, really hot. But she saw under it all. She saw him, his heart, his soul. She saw the man with the heart of gold and a soul so pure that it could make God himself cry. Sure, his road wasn’t always free from sin. But his intentions always were.

Turning on the shower, feeling the burn as the hot water hit her skin. Y/N found herself doing the one thing she never did. She cried. She spent the next hour curled up on the shower floor crying. The tears only fell harder, when she realised why she was crying. She was in love with a man that was never going to love her back. That was never going to see her as more than a friend and hunting partner. A man who was the reason she even started in or stayed in the family business. All for that once chance that he might love her back. He might let her in.

Her heart had realised long before her mind that her emotions would lead no where, that his heart would never be hers. The water ran cold, but Y/N didn’t seem to notice. She was so lost in her own grief that none of it mattered anymore.

She was alone, lost, confused, and some days had no idea what she was fighting for or why. She slowly got up and turned off the shower. She wrapped the hard, stiff towel of the motel room around her, and walked over to her duffle. Her choice of outfits was now all the same. Jeans, tank top, jacket. One FBI suit, and one fancy black dress. Her pyjamas were even a tank top and underwear. All of it dark. Black. Anyone who looked at her would think it was her favourite colour. But it wasn’t. Was it? She sighed because she didn’t even know what colour she liked anymore. All she knew was it wasn’t red. Pulling on clothes, she brushed her hair and contemplated life some more. What life there was to contemplate. It ended up thoughts of how lost she was, as she sat back against the headboard and stared into the dark, once again breathing in the musty scent of the stale motel room.

Dean headed back to the motel earlier than planned. He’d ditched the blonde. He’d grown tired of listening to her carry on, fake a laugh, and bitch. He didn’t need to put up with that. He pulled up in the carpark and hoped Y/N was still up. He needed to know what was wrong, to have decent conversation, to talk to the woman who always seen the best in everything. She was the best in everything. He smiled softly at himself as he pulled his phone out his pocket and looked at the time. The image of the two of them on his screen caught his eye. Sam had taken it while they were on a hunt. It had involved an upper class auction, and they had gone undercover. Dean smiled at the photo, reliving the moment in his mind. There had been dancing, and Dean was in a good mood. He grabbed Y/N and pulled her out onto the dance floor, wrapping his arms around her waist. His fingers brushing the skin of her exposed back. He ran through how she slid her arms over up chest and around his neck. He could still smell her, her shampoo, perfume, her. He closed his eyes for a second getting lost in the moment. They had finished the hunt and spent the night discussing why it would suck to be rich.

He looked at how she looked at him in that photo, like he was the only one in the room. His heart swelled. He didn’t think he could ever ask for a better friend.

He walked towards her motel and continued with his thoughts. She would have loved walking home tonight. She always enjoyed a stroll at night when the air was crisp. He looked up and frowned, not here though. There weren’t enough stars here. He wondered if she was watching Game of Thrones or Bones.

He was surprised to see her light off, it was early. She was never much of a sleeper. He knocked softly and called out. Trying the handle, he realised it was locked.

Dean felt his heart sink a bit. He was hoping to spend some time with her before he went to bed. Nothing perked up his nights like she did.

He went into his own room and showered, still contemplating things. Contemplating Y/N, she really was his best friend. But that’s all she was right? A friend?

He climbed out of the shower and into his boxers and shirt and looked over a Sam, who was sleeping in his bed. Dean lay back and looked at the ceiling. Y/N. He smiled wider as he thought of her, as he come to realise how much he depended on her to make himself feel better. How much he depended on her to make the world feel better. She was his girl. He picked his phone up and looked at the picture again, rolling over so the light didn’t wake his brother. He looked at the cold, empty space next to him and realised he didn’t want to do this anymore. He didn’t want it cold. He didn’t want it empty. And he sure to hell only wanted one person it in. Y/N.

He sent her a text, asking if she was awake. He prayed, begged and pleaded at his phone and Y/N that she answer. It all fell of deaf ears.

By morning, Dean had barely slept a wink. Last night revelation had him bouncing. He was thrilled he had figured things. He felt horrible for not realising sooner. But he knew now and that’s all that mattered. He ignored Sam’s request for help on cross roads demon case they were working and ran outside, banging on Y/N’s door. He had called her phone but she hadn’t answered. Knowing her it was on silent or she was in the shower. Dean kept trying for over an hour to get Y/N out of bed or to open her door. He was beginning to worry. It wasn’t like her at all.

By the two hour mark, Dean was picking the lock. She’d be annoyed, but she’d understand. Her room had been cleared out. All that was left was her cell, a photo of the three of them that she carried in her purse and a note.

I’ll be ok. Don’t worry.

Those five words tore Dean’s heart from his chest. She was gone, he had no idea why. He never got a chance to find out what’s wrong, why she was upset. He never got to tell her the most important thing in the world. He loved her. With all his heart and soul. He loved everything about her, from her hair, to her smile, to her heart of gold. He had spent years searching for the girl that made him feel like this, years looking in every town from Hollywood to Redwood and he never even realised it was right in front of him the whole time.

Dean slumped to the floor next to the bed and let the tears fall down. He didn’t know what to do anymore. This morning he was set on pulling her into his arms and showing her how much he loved her. Now, he was just lost.

Dean pulled himself together and went through her room, top to bottom hoping to find something that gave him even the smallest hint of where she was. He came up empty.

Sam looked up as the motel room door slammed open, he reached for the gun expecting a fight. That all changed when he caught sight of Dean. He had never seen him this angry, hurt or upset.

‘You and Y/N have a fight?’

‘Hard to have a fight when she’s done a runner,’ Dean growled, snatching Sam’s laptop.

Sam watched in shock as Dean ran tracers on Y/N’s other phones, her laptop, her iPod all coming up blank.

‘When did she go?’

‘Sometime during the night.’

Dean handed him the letter and started pacing.

‘Something’s wrong, Sammy.’

‘Yeah, it is. The way she was talking last night,’ Sam frowned remembering what was said.

He became mad at himself for not paying more attention. Not pushing things, for letting Dean and the blonde interrupt. He knew she was troubled, that something was wrong and he didn’t push it.

‘What did she say exactly?’

‘She talked about settling down, wondering if we’d ever find a place and just do what Bobby does. She commented that 30 was old and maybe we should all think about going to Stanford.’

‘Huh?’

‘I know. Maybe it’s just getting too her, all this. The motels, the killing, the fighting, the injuries. She’s not as immune to it as we seem to be. Up until I came back from Stanford, she always had plans on settling down and having a family.’

Dean looked at Sam, his jaw dropped.

‘She told you that?’

Sam nodded, he knew that upset his brother. Dean and Y/N were close. But some things they just didn’t talk about, and Sam knew that. Some things Dean just wouldn’t understand.

‘She stopped talking about it though. I figured she’d moved past it.’

‘Forget the hunt. Find her.’

Sam nodded and took his laptop back. Both men were worried. This was completely out of sorts for Y/N.

Y/N moved around from town to town, she took on the odd hunt but found herself struggling with it all. Maybe it was time for a break, to mentally regroup.

She finished a spirit hunt in Lebanon, Kansas and decided to stay around. She had no idea why. Something about this place called to her. As she lay on the motel bed, staring at the ceiling she considered her options. The cool breeze that came through the open window felt nice, it was soothing, calming, reassuring. It was home. It was stupid, she sighed.

Gathering up her jacket and winter woollies she headed out to the local park and sat down to write. She made lists, and she felt silly doing it, but she needed to know. Likes, dislikes, happy times and sad, favourite memories, worst memories. All of it. Future plans…she came up blank. She knew one thing though. She needed a home. Some place she could go when this life was too much. And after years of travelling, Lebanon was the closest feeling she had ever had to it. She headed back to the motel, grabbing a paper along the way.

Dean had travelled from one side of the US to the other and was now heading North. Nothing he did was going to stop him from finding her. Sam had since gone to Bobby’s to help with a case, leaving Dean alone with his thoughts.

Thoughts can be a dangerous thing, especially when you are alone with no hint of a distraction. Dean considered everything they knew about Y/N. The things she had said. He thought back to the time before Sam went to Stanford, he’d planned on settling down too one day. Then one thing lead to another, his Dad went missing, Jess died, everything went up the creek and he had to stay in this life, there was no escaping it.

Was she right about being too old? Sure, they got injured more now than they used to. And recovery was a bit longer, but the fights had been more brutal. He was 30 now, was it time to look at settling down, at cutting back?

The more Dean drove, the more he thought. The more he mined and dug through his soul, heart and desires trying to figure out exactly what he wanted. He knew one thing though, in all of this he wanted Y/N, in every way imaginable.

Y/N smiled as she shifted the furniture in her new place. It was a small three bedroom bungalow, but it was cosy, homey and perfect for her. A wood fire kept it warm in winter, the large tree’s outside shading it from the harsh sun. The garden needed work, but she didn’t care. It was cheap, small and hers. She had used some of the money her parents had left her. The boys had refused to let her use it to help fund the hunting. It didn’t sit right with them. The account eventually forgotten, it now held a nice sum for Y/N to start a life. She finished setting up the place, mostly second hand furniture. Not that it bothered her, it was still better than motel rooms. She put more wood on her fire and walked into the kitchen, smiling at the slow cooker as it cooked a pot roast. He next task was what next, a job? Study? Hunt? She had no idea. But for tonight, she was going to enjoy home.

She went to go back into the living room when the familiar old, dog eared picture of her and the boys she had stuck to the fridge caught her eye. They were the only thing missing in this life. She gently ran her fingers over the image and all of a sudden the walls felt like they were closing in, panic hit and a sick feeling swarmed her stomach as she felt like she had made a mistake. Could she honestly live in a world without them in it? One where she didn’t see them everyday. The lack of 2am conversations with Dean were already taking toll. She felt like she was losing her mind. Was this better than staying with them and wistful thinking that some day he might love her in return.

She pulled on her scarf, jacket and boots and headed out, she needed air. To pull things back into perspective, before she had a panic attack. It was all too late now. She’d signed the papers; the house was hers. She took off walking through the streets of Lebanon, it was supposed to snow soon. She smiled at the thought. She hasn’t seen snow in a while, it always added a certain romantic factor to things.

Dean was driving through a small town in Kansas, taking it all in. Something about this place drew him in. He had no idea why. He felt comfortable, at ease, safe. The town was home. He did something he never really did, drove through the back streets. He wanted to check the town out. He’d already found the local motel and bar. Both seemed great. But now he wanted to get to the town. Maybe one day he could bring Y/N here. He was driving down a small back street when he spotted someone walking. He’d recognise that someone anywhere. He pulled baby over and jumped out of the car.

‘Y/N!’ he cried, so grateful he had found her. So relieved she was ok.

‘Dean?’ she sounded shocked, and he couldn’t blame her it was the last place anyone would have looked for him. ‘What are you doing here?’

‘Searching for you. God, I have been everywhere trying to find you.’

‘That really wasn’t necessary.’

‘Of course it was.’

‘Where’s Sam?’

‘Bobby’s. I can’t believe you are here, of all places.’

She looked at him funny. Dean just smiled.

‘I was thinking as I drove around town, how much I liked this place. How I wanted to bring you here one day.’

‘Well, I’m here and the towns great.’

‘So much better now I know you’re in it.’

Y/N frowned at him, Dean was…well, scaring her.

‘Are you ok?’ she questioned.

‘Am I…? No, I’m not ok,’ he growled.

Y/N fought back a smile, that was more like Dean.

‘I rock up at your motel room to tell you I’m a moron, and that I love you and I want and need you. And I find you’ve packed up and ran off in the middle of the night. Leaving no explanation, no way to find you, to even know if your dead or alive. No, I’m not ok.’

Y/N looked at him in shock, her mouth opened several times but nothing came out.

‘I was so scared I’d lost you,’ Dean said quieter this time, his voice less angry. ‘I was terrified I’d never get the chance to tell you how I felt,’ his voice barely above a whisper. The wind that was picking up around them carrying his words off with it.

‘No matter who I’m with, no one compared to you. The more I spent time with others, the more I wanted to be with you.’

Y/N didn’t know what to say, she couldn’t decide if she was hearing right or the wind was distorting his words. Or maybe she had slipped and hit her head. That seemed like the more logical explanation.

Dean watched confusion crossed her face, as she worked through what he had said, what he had tried to say. He watched as snow flakes started falling lightly and they caught and sat in her hair. He watched as her fingers gently pulled one off her cheek, and looked to the sky and smiled. He knew she liked the snow, and that it had been a while. He smiled at the sight of her, it was a happy smile, relaxed, calm. She hadn’t worn one of those in while. She looked beautiful.

Dean moved in before he could stop himself, his hunt for her was over. She was finally here in front of him. He grasped her chin and moved her face towards him, bringing his own lips down to meet hers. The small gasp that escaped her lips, let him know she wasn’t expecting it. He couldn’t help but smile slightly. He moved his hand across her face and down her neck.

‘Dean!’ she squeaked.

Dean yanked back quicker than he had ever moved.

‘I’m so sorry, I shouldn’t have. I just-.’

‘No, that was fine. Your hand was like really cold.’

Dean looked at her and saw her fighting back a laugh. Her nose and cheeks were red, and she was huddled slightly.

‘Come sit in baby,’ he suggested, wanting to get her out of the cold and into some kind of warmth before she got sick.

‘How you about we just go inside?’

She gestured to the house behind her, and Dean took it in. It was nice, welcoming, something you could come back to again and again. He pulled Baby into her drive and met her inside with his bag. The living room was cosy and warm, the house smelt of dinner.

The two caught up and talked. Neither mentioning the kiss. Neither wanting to push things, both too scared the other wasn’t interested. Y/N told Dean everything, omitting her feelings for him. He told her the result of the self mining he had done while he was searching for her. Both agreeing that maybe they were getting older, that they couldn’t keep going like they were doing.

‘It’s a nice place,’ Dean told Y/N looking around.

‘Yeah, it’s home. It’s stupid I know. But I just growing up, hunting, I never had it. And now…’

Dean smiled at her, now she did. And it suited her, more than any machete in her hand ever will.

‘I get it. I feel it,’ he grinned.

He understood completely, and it wasn’t silly. He could picture sitting down to watch a basketball game or a movie, being out back cutting up wood, helping with dishes. Hell, he could even picture mowing the lawn.

‘And it’s not silly.’

Y/N smiled at him and Dean watched as relief flooded her face, and a happiness took over.

‘So what’s your plans?’ he asked, uncertain. ‘You out?’

‘Honestly, I don’t know. When I left, I couldn’t take much of anything. I didn’t even know what colours I liked,’ she smiled sadly at him. ‘I needed a home, I needed to know who I was and I was so happy to finally get it.’

‘But?’

‘But, then I realised that it didn’t feel right. Not from the prospect of not hunting. But from not being around you two all the time. You’re home too.’

Dean smiled at her.

‘I can’t keep hunting non stop, but I can’t spend a life without you in it. So I’m not sure.’

Dean moved in closer, rubbing his hands along his thighs to warm them up. Y/N watched curious, before laughing. He knew then she had realised what he was doing.

‘Nice and warm,’ he smiled, pushing his hands along her cheeks and into her hair, as his lips met hers.

‘Much better,’ she whispered as he pulled back to check it was ok.

‘How about we cut back. Use this place as a base, spend time off here. Make sure we get time off,’ he added. ‘You can come back hunting with us, or stay here or a mix of both. While you find the balance you need.’

He watched as she bit her lip while she thought about it. Dean kissed her again.

‘We can make this a home, together,’ he offered, quietly.

He watched as she nodded slightly, and breathed a sigh of relief. He moved his gear into her room that night, and never looked back. He had been searching for years and he finally found what he was looking for.  

Cornerstone Needed, Apply Within

Pairing: Dean/Cas
Length: 2.2k
Tags: Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Dubcon Kissing, 12x03 coda

Castiel sneered at the empty passenger seat as he threw the old Ford pickup into park. The lingering scent of Crowley was still clouding up the place. He’d even rolled the windows down during the drive, but nothing helped air the King of Hell out of his life. I’ll just have to get an air freshener, he decided quickly. In whatever scent Crowley hates most. It was really the least he could do if he was doomed to buddy cop with a demon for the whole Lucifer hunt.

At least Rowena had snuffed the problem for the present. Cas would take the reprieve happily.

He sighed and slid out of the truck, trudged through the garage and into the warmth of the bunker. Angel or not, the fifteen hour car ride back from Cleveland had him stiff.

The rooms were dark. The early hours of the morning had silence laid thick as a blanket on the inside. Just the gentle pinging of the air vents to break the morbid quiet. Cas passed the kitchen and a cast of milky monitor light caught his eye. Dean was plopped at the kitchen table, laptop gleaming his dusky face into the hall, crystal tumbler beside him laughing back the details.

Cas stopped mid stride, backed up and hung in the doorway, trench swinging behind him. The bottle of Johnnie Walker beside the computer was telling secrets; Dean was drinking again. He hadn’t so much as looked sideways at a fifth since his mother had come back, but that bottle was half gone.

Cas diverted into the kitchen, pulled a chair out beside him and plopped down. “Hello, Dean.”

“I thought you were hot on the Devil’s trail,” Dean mumbled barely glancing up. He was reading through some news report on a rash of strange suicides in rural Michigan. Scrolling through a thick block of text like it had the answers to all his problems written between the lines.

“I was, but it’s run cold for now.” Cas said. He squinted, looked through the dark halls. “Where is everyone?”

The muscle at Dean’s jaw jumped. “Sam finally crashed,” he said quietly.

Cas waited, and when he realized Dean was done he asked, “And your mother?” because she’d been crawling the halls at all hours over the past few weeks too.

Dean twisted the tumbler between his fingers, sucked his cheeks between his teeth as he threw it back and drained what was left at the bottom. He tipped the bottle and poured himself another healthy dose. “She left,” he said with a slick liquor growl.

Whiskey was for forgetting.

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