and i love him more each year :')

anonymous asked:

In my religion class a few years ago we talked about how back in the time that the Bible was written, people didn't understand that there was more than one sexuality. My teacher also pointed out that the Bible was divinely inspired by God, NOT written by him. So I think that God honestly doesn't care if two people of the same sex love each other or get married. It's not the same thing as adultery, like another Christian blog tried to say when they were asked about same sex relationships

Interesting! Though I wouldn’t say that God doesn’t care when gay people get married - I believe They bless gay marriages, just as They bless opposite gender marriages.

anonymous asked:

I know off-camera Dan randomly tells Arin he loves him or compliments him after they tell stories about previous years ((for example the "You think I'm amazing? You're amazing!" In that one SMM episode and then the "I love you more with each passing day" in Spongebob 2)) so hc that Dan just always tells Arin how much he loves him like he calls him up out of nowhere and is like "hey...I love you....." and shiz like that

dan is a suuuuper affectionate person and when he feels super close to someone he’s sure to let them know. not only that, he’s super physical with his affection, i.e. cuddles, hugs, hanging off the shoulders, light touches. so his affection for arin just pours out and he’s constantly just finding himself saying “you’re so talented” “you’re amazing” “I love being around you” “you’re such a joy in my life” and so on. arin blushes and tries to brush off the compliments but dan wants him to know how awesome he is no matter what.

• send me your egobang headcanons •

After being married for 65 years, we don’t love each anymore. Sure we respect each other and have affection for one another but he can’t hear me most of the time and I can’t stand him anymore. We care about each but love fades away with time. And it becomes something more beautiful: a fusion of two imperfect beings into a perfect one.
Love is just the beginning, it’s what comes after that counts.
—  what my grandmother said when I asked if she still loves my grandfather on their 65th anniversary, idontdeservetobehere 

“People who see us from the outside think that our greatest struggle is the disability. It’s not. Our greatest struggle is that we’d fallen out of love with each other. I lost a lot of my independence when Tatiana was born. I fell into a depression. He was working a lot. We grew distant. I didn’t think I could ever love him again. Two years ago I prayed one night, and said: ‘God, you’ve done so much. Please grant me one more miracle and make me love him again.’ The first change came from me. He’s always been the easygoing one, so I had to change first. I started trusting more. I tried to be more forgiving and understanding. I started to cook for him and organize things around the house. And he started spending more time at home. We started enjoying each other’s company. We talked about things other than diseases. And we started going out together– just like this. It was like I suddenly met a friend, who became my best friend, who became my love. And our life started over again.”

(São Paulo, Brazil)

let’s talk about that “I love you”

Originally posted by spndaily

Why is the “I love you” admission in S12E12 Stuck in the Middle (With You) such a big deal? Oh, he’s not looking at Dean when he says it, you say?

Let’s consider this. For 8 seasons, we’ve seen Cas’s eyes burn holes into Dean’s. Even non-shippers can admit to the aggressive eye-sex that goes on between Dean/Cas (Jensen/Misha, chicken/egg) in nearly every episode they share together.

Cas has never had a problem making eye contact with Dean when he’s talking to him, when he’s not, and regardless of the subject matter. There’s nothing he’s uncomfortable with telling Dean.

But an admission of love…for either of them, it’s a taboo concept. Dean loves Sam more than anything in the world, and you can tell..but he won’t say it. He’s never said it.

Cas looks down, says “I love you”, then up at Sam and Mary, and reiterates “I love all of you.”

Cas thinks he’s dying, and the most important thing to him is telling these people he loves them. These people who do not and will not throw the words around willingly. Or in Dean’s case, at all.

Cas is uncomfortable telling Dean he loves him, because he knows this. He doesn’t look at him, because he knows Dean better than anyone, and he knows looking at him would make Dean uncomfortable. Would make him shut down. But he has to tell him, because he’s dying, and Dean deserves to know.

The lack of eye contact, to me, is telling. Notice he had no trouble making eye contact with Sam and Mary when he says “I love all of you”. The lack of eye contact tells me that something is out of the ordinary here, because I am more than used to Dean and Cas eye-fucking each other. It was a red flag to me. It was one of those “Hey, what just happened there?” moments. Where something was off, but you couldn’t quite put your finger on it.

We know the bond Cas and Dean share in canon. If their relationship was completely platonic, eye contact shouldn’t have been a problem (as it hasn’t been for the past eight years). But yet, here we are. The one time Cas isn’t able to hold Dean’s gaze, and it’s when he tells him he loves him.

That seems like an admission of romantic feelings, if you ask me.

Being Justin's best friend and dating Zach would include...

•Justin is very close with your family because obviously his isn’t great

•He’s introduced you to some of the best people in your life. (Zach being one of them)

•Justin hugging you constantly

•Play wrestling is a constant with you two

•Everyone thinks you two have hooked up, but you never have.

•You’ve kissed playfully though.

•All of his girlfriends have gotten insecure about you. Including Jess, who’s your friend as well.

•People think it’s weird that y'all cuddle but you guys have been doing it since you were five so???

•When Zach first met you he saw you at your most comfortable. You were hot tubbing with Justin at Bryce’s.

•Plus Justin was Uber protective.

•Zach had classes with you at the middle school you both went to but he’d never noticed you really

•Back to the first time you met, it’s middle school, hormones are high, and you’re in a bikini

•Long story short, Zach has to leave the hot tub after just a few minutes.

•Even after you get together, and after high school, no one ever lets him live down that little Zachy had to leave because of an unwarranted boner

•After you break up with Montgomery De La Cruz, for his cheating and his constant need to get into fights. Justin sees how lonely you are.

•He’s always wanted you to date Zach, the purest of his friends.

•"Ya know, Zach’s single. I think he’d take you on a date.“

•"As a favor to you? No thanks.”

•Zach starting to talk to you and sit by you at random times during the school day.

•"how much is Justin paying you?“

•"paying me? Think higher of yourself, Y/N”

•Zach convincing you to study with him at his house after a week of this.

•Justin’s right, you two hit it off

•Justin ALWAYS crashing your dates

•when you say things referring to “your man” from the stands at basketball games, they both look up.

•Justin shipping you two even more after Zach shuts Bryce’s comments about you down.

•Zach being the kind of boyfriend that wants to know fun facts and opinions you have.

•"I really don’t think Zach will ever know more about you than me.“

•"You have a ten year advantage”

•Zach’s mom repeatedly talking to Justin about your relationship. She’s protective, like him. They get info from each other.

•"he’s in love with her, Justin.“

•"good. Because she loves him”

•Justin looking like the third wheel

•But you, justin, and Zach all think of yourselves as the third wheel when it’s just you three hanging out together.

•"Id do anything for her, Justin"

•"Better stay that way, Dempsey"

AHHHHH hope you guys liked these. Keep requesting :)

  • me: the worst thing about getting unlikely lovers right after thrill of first love on shuffle is the contrast in whizzer's tone of voice. in thrill of first love, he sounds very cocky and we get the impression that he is only with marvin for sex--which is a little sad because marvin left his wife and child to be with whizzer. however, in unlikely lovers, he adapts a much softer, more emotional attitude, and we know from this alone that he has come to care very deeply about marvin. i get the feeling that during the two years of their separation, both men realised just how much they loved each other. this must have been a big deal for whizzer, who is portrayed as a little apathetic in act one. and now that he's finally come to accept his feelings for marvin, he falls fatally ill. and yes, we see him still joking around a little bit ("do you want me to reply?") but the fact that his voice is so much more emotional and fragile shows real character development.
  • taxi driver: we're here
Perfect

Originally posted by jugheadjones94

Anon requests:can I request a Jughead Jones imagine where the reader moved from Riverdale a few years ago and comes back while the Jason Blossom death mystery (she knows what happened and all even Ms. Grundy) she and Jughead had a past together (like Jughead and Archie liked her and they were bffs but she liked Jug more) and they still love each other and Jughead sees her at school and it hits him that she’s back but he’s dating Betty and Archie still likes her and it pisses off Jug. The ending’s up to you :)

Could you do a Jughead x reader based on Perfect by Ed Sheeran??

Pairing: Jughead x Betty, Archie x Reader, Jughead x Reader

Description: An old childhood crush returns, and of course, drama ensues.

Warnings: none

Word count: 2,208

A/N: wow okay so I totally strayed from the prompts but I’m hoping you like it anyway?? Anyhow, enjoy!


I found a love for me

Darling, just dive right in and follow my lead

Well, I found a girl, beautiful and sweet

Oh, I never knew you were the someone waiting for me

Jughead stood in the school hallway by Betty’s locker, talking and laughing with her.  His eyes almost missed a figure walking past him, but at the last second his gaze flickered to a girl striding down the hallway.  He did a double take as he realized who it was.

“(Y/N)?” he muttered under his breath, interrupting his conversation with Betty.

“What?” Betty asked, looking over her shoulder at the girl who just passed by.  “(Y/N)?  Didn’t she used to live around here or something?”

“Yeah,” he answered, breathless. “Yeah, but then she moved.”

“Well, I guess she’s back,” Betty replied, then steered the conversation back to their previous topic. Jughead nodded and responded to everything Betty said, but he couldn’t help but let his mind wander to the girl who returned to Riverdale.

Jughead was not the only member of (Y/N)’s childhood to be shaken by her return; Archie spotted her roaming the hallways later that day.  His heartbeat started to quicken as the feelings for his childhood crush rushed back to him.

“(Y/N)!” he yelled, following her down the hallway.  She turned around at the call of her name, and when she noticed Archie, she broke out into a grin.

“Archie!” she exclaimed, walking towards him.  “How are you?”

“I’m good,” he answered, and they soon fell in step as they began to walk in the same direction.  “How are you?”

“I’m great,” she beamed.

“So you’re back,” he noted, a smile never leaving his face.  (Y/N) smiled and nodded.

“I am,” she replied.  “Just moved back a few days ago, actually.” The conversation lulled for a moment, neither (Y/N) or Archie knowing what to say.  “So how’s Jughead?” she asked, breaking the silence.

“He’s good,” Archie answered. “He’s got a girlfriend now.”  (Y/N) froze.

“Really?” she questioned, painting a smile on her face.  “Who?”

“Do you remember Betty Cooper?” Archie asked, and (Y/N) nodded.  “He’s dating her.”

“Oh wow,” (Y/N) fake laughed. “Honestly, I always thought she had a thing for you.”

“She did,” Archie shrugged, “but I didn’t feel the same.  She moved on to Jughead, I guess.”  The pair fell into a moment of silence again before the ringing of the school bell broke it.

“Well, I have to get to biology,” (Y/N) said, moving away from Archie.  Before she got too far, Archie called out after her.

“Hey, do you wanna catch up sometime?  Like maybe meet at Pop’s tonight?”  

“Yeah,” (Y/N) smiled.  “Yeah, I’d like that.”

That night, when (Y/N) entered Pop’s, the first face she saw was not Archie.  Rather, it was Jughead, who she had not yet seen since she moved back. Scanning the diner to make sure Archie wasn’t waiting for her, (Y/N) walked towards Jughead’s booth.

“Jughead, hey,” she greeted as she approached his table.  He glanced up from his laptop to see (Y/N) standing over him.

“(Y/N),” he said with wide eyes. He slowly closed his laptop lid, then gestured for her to sit.  “You’re back.”

“Yes,” she nodded, “I am.”  Before Jughead could say anything else, the bell on the door jingled, signaling a new customer had entered.  It was Archie.  “Well,” (Y/N) said, standing up, “that’s my cue to leave.  See you around, Jug.”  Jughead tensed at the use of his old nickname, and he watched as (Y/N) walked over to Archie and sat across from him in a booth.  He felt his blood boil every time she laughed at something he said. Constantly, he reminded himself there was nothing to be jealous of, he had a girlfriend.  Somehow, that only made his longing for (Y/N) worse.

‘Cause we were just kids when we fell in love

Not knowing what it was

Jughead, Archie, and (Y/N) were in third grade.  It was a hot summer day, filled with sticky popsicle hands, grass tickling the bottom of bare feet, and a bright sun radiating an immense amount of heat.  The children were running around in (Y/N)’s backyard with not a care in the world.  Suddenly, (Y/N) tripped and scraped her knee.  She cried out in pain, causing the boys to turn around in shock.

“(Y/N)!” Jughead exclaimed, both him and Archie running over to her side.

“Are you okay?” Archie asked, examining her knee.

“I’m fine,” she pushed both boys away.  “It’s just a scrape.”  This didn’t relieve the concerned looks from either of the boys’ faces, and (Y/N), looking directly at Jughead, repeated that she was fine.  Jughead reached out a hand and helped her up.

None of the children knew it at the time, but one day Jughead and (Y/N) would reflect on this day and realize that at this moment, something in their relationship changed.  There was a shift from friendship to love, and it all started on the day where (Y/N) scraped her knee.

I will not give you up this time

But darling, just kiss me slow, your heart is all I own

And in your eyes you’re holding mine

Archie asked (Y/N) to Pop’s again. And again.  And again.  On the fifth visit, Archie confessed his feelings for (Y/N) and asked if they could call these trips to Pop’s dates.  (Y/N), although deep down she knew her heart belonged to someone else, agreed. Neither of them payed any attention to the slamming of the door at the front.  Jughead had stormed out after hearing the exchange.

“We should have a double date,” Archie suggested to Jughead one day during school.  Jughead rolled his eyes, slamming his locker shut.

“Why?” he questioned and began strolling down the hallway.  Archie followed.

“Because I think it’d be fun,” he answered, oblivious to Jughead’s jealousy.  “I mean we were both super close with (Y/N) when we were younger, and it’s not like her and Betty are strangers.  I think it’d be fun.”  He walked off, leaving Jughead alone to his thoughts.

Jughead weighed the pros and cons of going on this double date.  On the one hand, maybe having Betty and (Y/N) together in the same room as him might help set himself straight.  He was sick of feeling guilty every time he was around Betty.  But on the other hand, he was afraid of seeing (Y/N) with Archie.  Sure, he saw them together at Pop’s all the time, but if both of them were sitting in front of him, he would not be able to look away.  He’d be forced to watch as Archie wrapped his arms around (Y/N), and he’d have to see her laughing at all his jokes.  And the worse part would be that as he sat next to Betty, the only thing he’d be thinking about is how he wished to be in Archie’s place.

Finally, Jughead made up his mind and texted Archie his answer:

Yes.  Let’s do the double date.

The night of the double date arrived, and Jughead was second-guessing his decision.  Maybe this was a bad idea.  Or maybe it’ll be fine.  No, this was an awful idea.

They didn’t do anything fancy for the double date; all four of them agreed that Pop’s was the best place to go.  When Jughead arrived at the diner, the only other person there was (Y/N).  He approached the booth and slid into it across from her.

“Hey,” he greeted.  She smiled.

“Hey, Jug,” she responded. Neither of them said anything else, both of them caught up in their own whirlwind of thoughts.  This is how it should be.  This is how they should be.

“This was a mistake,” Jughead finally said, breaking the tension.  He stood up and began to exit.

“What are you doing?” (Y/N) called out after him.  He stopped and spun on his heel, but he didn’t come back to the table.

“Leaving, (Y/N), I’m leaving,” he answered, his voice sharp.  (Y/N) rolled her eyes.

“I know that, dumbass, I mean why?”

“Because I can’t do this,” he threw his hands up in the air in frustration.  “I can’t sit across from you and watch you be happy with someone else.” Neither (Y/N) or Jughead noticed that Betty and Archie had just entered the diner.

“Why?  You can’t be happy for me?” (Y/N) demanded, stepping a tiny bit closer to Jughead.  He shook his head.

“No, I can’t,” he replied.  “Not when you’re happy with someone else.”  

“Then who do you want me to be happy with?”

“With me, goddammit!” he shouted. (Y/N) froze.

“With you?” she repeated, quieter. Jughead buried his face in his hands.

“Jesus,” he mumbled into his skin, “I shouldn’t have said that.”

“Well since you did,” (Y/N) took a couple more steps closer to Jughead, “why don’t you explain yourself?”

“I’m in love with you, okay?” he shouted, throwing arms up.  “Is that what you wanted to hear?  I have been in love with you since the third grade, and then you fucking left.  So I started dating Betty because I thought she made me happy, and dammit she does make me happy.  But then you came back, you just had to come back.  Now Betty, poor Betty, she doesn’t have a clue.  I still love you, (Y/N), but now you’re dating Archie and this is just a big pile of shit.”  (Y/N) stood there motionless, unable to move.

“Since the third grade?” she asked, her voice barely above a whisper.  Jughead nodded.

“Jughead,” Betty finally gained the courage to speak.  Her voice caught the attention of both Jughead and (Y/N), causing their focus to snap over to the blonde and the ginger standing in the entrance.

“How much of that did you hear?” Jughead groaned.  Betty smiled sadly.

“All of it.”

“You must hate me,” he said, and Betty shook her head.

“No, Juggie, I don’t hate you. But I do think you should’ve told me how you felt.”  She walked up to him, kissed him on the cheek, and then slowly walked backwards. “I’m not going to keep you from the girl you love.”  She sent him one more sad smile before exiting the diner, leaving Jughead, Archie, and (Y/N).

“Jughead,” Archie started, but Jughead held up his hand to stop him.

“No, Archie, this isn’t about me,” Jughead said.  “It’s about (Y/N).”  Both of the boys turned to face (Y/N), and she couldn’t help but recall that time when she scraped her knee.  That time where both of the boys showed concern for her, but she only appreciated it from one of them.

“(Y/N)?” Archie questioned. “It’s okay if you don’t want to… you know.”  She looked at him sadly.

“Archie,” she began, “I love you. I truly, truly do.”  Jughead deflated at this, and he was about to exit the diner when (Y/N) continued.  “But I can’t lead you on like this.  You’ve been one of my best friends since we were little, and I don’t want anything to ruin that.”  She didn’t have to say anything else, because Archie nodded in understanding.  He hugged (Y/N) tight, and they stood embracing each other in the diner, Jughead watching.  They pulled apart and Archie nodded at Jughead before he, too, left the diner.

Jughead and (Y/N) stood facing each other in the oddly vacant diner.

“So…” (Y/N) drawled.  “You love me?”

Baby, I’m dancing in the dark with you between my arms

Barefoot on the grass, listening to our favorite song

When you said you looked a mess, I whispered underneath my breath

But you heard it, darling, you look perfect tonight

Neither of them had any idea of what to say, so they agreed to go home and meet up again tomorrow.  Both (Y/N) and Jughead stayed awake the whole night, wondering what they were going to say to the other the next day.

That fateful day arrived, and (Y/N) walked into Pop’s, immediately spotting Jughead sitting in a booth.  She approached the booth, and as she neared it, Jughead looked up at the sound of her footsteps.  He smiled.

“Sorry, I’m kind of a mess today,” she laughed, gesturing to her disheveled state.  She was wearing a baggy sweatshirt and a pair of leggings with a small hole in them, and her hair was falling out of its ponytail.

“You look perfect,” he whispered, not intending for her to hear it.  However, he realized he said it too loud when he saw her smile.  She sat down across from him.

“So you love me,” she repeated what he had said yesterday, and Jughead nodded.

“I do,” he replied.  (Y/N) pursed her lips for a moment, her eyebrows furrowed.

“I love you, too,” she finally said, barely above a whisper.

Well I found a woman, stronger than anyone I know

She shares my dreams, I hope that someday I’ll share her home

I found a love, to carry more than just my secrets

To carry love, to carry children of our own

We are still kids, but we’re so in love

Fighting against all odds

I know we’ll be alright this time

Darling, just hold my hand

Be my girl, I’ll be your man

I see my future in your eyes

Best Friends (End)

Summary: Meeting in college, you and Bucky strike up a friendship. And that is all there is, until Bucky realizes he’s in love with you. But it might just be a little too late for that.

Word Count: 602

Masterlist

A/N: Thank you for sticking with me ‘til the end! I hope you all enjoy!

Originally posted by natpekis

Thick, tense-filled silence overcame the room as you turned around and met Bucky’s eyes. Inhaling sharply, you let go of Tony’s hand and stepped down from the stage you were on.

“Bucky?” you called out to him.

Bucky gave you a large smile as the two of you met in the middle of the aisle. He was sweating profusely and you gave him a concerned glance.

“Are you okay?”

“Have you said ‘I do’ yet?”

Keep reading

Slow and Steady

A Bucky Barnes One-Shot

Character Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Female Reader

Word Count: 1390

Warnings: 18+ Smut. Unprotected sex, dirty talk, swearing. NSFW gif toward the bottom. PWP… no plot here, just sex with Bucky.

Request Prompt: After taking things slow, Bucky decides he is finally ready to have sex with you. (Post CA:CW Cryo)

A/N: This was supposed to be a drabble for my follower celebration, but it just kept getting longer and longer so it’s now a one-shot. (credit to the gif owners)

Originally posted by secretly-buckybarnes

I want you.”

Three simple words, formed into a little sentence.

You stood in front of him, heart racing and body slightly shivering. You have waited for those words to leave his lips for months.

Bucky walked slowly to you. He reached up to cup your jaw in his flesh hand, “You’ve been so patient with me,” he whispered. “Any other person would have given up on me.”

You shook your head, “I have been perfectly content to wait for as long you needed me to.” You said. “I still will wait if you want too.”

He smiled at you softly, “Oh doll, I don’t want to wait any longer.”

“What do you need me to do?” You whispered, not knowing what to do with your hands.

He slowly leaned forward and pressed his lips to yours. Such a simple kiss, but it was enough to send fireworks through your body.

When he leaned away, that small smile was still there. “I know this is going to sound weird because our whole relationship has been slow,” he said, unease creeping into his voice. “But I need to take this slow too.”

You brought your arms up to wrap around his waist, “I’m ok with slow.”

His hand went to the back of your neck, pulling you into his body. “God, I love you.” He said before slanting his lips over yours again.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

Drarry thought, wonder how draco would react to harry breaking up with him like he did to ginny in at the end of 6th year. I can't decide between draco out right refusing harrys break up, or something funny like him saying ok to humor him, but than some how banding together with hermione to come on the camping trip of hell in secret. Slytherin are sneaky little shits. I should know i am one

I know I’ve read more than one fic that has this sort of scenario playing out.

And my personal favorite is that Draco would refuse solely because I love that he would always reuse to take any shit from Harry and that they would call each other on their bullshit. So I like to imagine Draco saying something like

“Oh for Merlins sake you’re not breaking up with that is ridiculous as the idea you had last week about me sitting at the Gryffindor table.”

“But-”

“No.”

“But Draco I could get hurt, I might not come back. I don’t want you waiting for something I might not be able to give you and I don’t want someone trying to hurt you because we’re together.”

“Are you quite finished, Harry?”

And Harry nods, a bit confused at how the conversation is going.

“Ok good. First off you’re not breaking up with me so stop spouting nonsense. Secondly stop having an emotional crisis it doesn’t become you, thirdly”

“But Draco-”

“Oh for fucks sake, Harry, shut up! You’re not breaking up with me and I’m not scared so please pass me my Potions book and stop talking.”

anonymous asked:

dicta do you have any larry fic recs? nothing specific but just any fic that you loved a lot? thank you, your opinion on fics means a lot to me, and i feel like you'd probably know the really good ones!

Oh my gosh anon I love the wording of this ask so much. I’ve been meaning to make a larry rec list for going on a year but it just feels so official/overwhelming? But this, fic I loved a lot??? I can absolutely do that!!! and aaaaah there are SO MANY!!! I am not as organized about larry fic as drarry fic so this is, basically, like, a list of fics that stuck in my brain and/or heart and that are all so so good. SO GOOD! (and tbh there’s a whole other list of stuff that i’d rec but would want to reread before attempting commentary, and I have so many things marked for later and like….yeah….there’s a lot of good fic out there) And really, what better rec is there than “this is a fic that stuck in my brain and/or heart”?? Everyone should read them all!!

an act of faith against the night by @elianefics- M, 65k - It’s a clear path, drawing itself in Harry’s mind – where they began, how they ended up here. It’s not hard to convey all the events that led them to this very moment, with all of their twists and turns, not when Harry has been going through them again and again every night, albeit searching for something else.  “Did you know?” When Harry replies, it’s a question, not an answer. “Did you know, that it would end like this?” [Harry and Louis had never imagined that, when they would finally go back to New York, it would be as spies.] (part two of the landscapes of war series)

  • The war from ‘a prayer for which no words exist’ (recced below!) is over, or at least as over as war can be for the people who were there, which is to say….not all that over, just taking different shape. I have endless love for the way this fic treats that aftermath, the way it shows how deeply and irreversibly harry and Louis were shaped by being fighters, and it is a stunning mix of beautiful prose and important ethical questions. It also does some really fascinating meta work with Simon Cowell, the Azoffs, and the Cordens taking on central roles in the post-war nation-building project. It’s a lot for one fic to do, and this one manages it beautifully, and throws in some more beautiful NYC cityscapes, heartaching and conflicted nostalgia, and taut but unwavering H/L love, you know, just for good measure.

another hazy may by deLILAh - M, 41k - louis is a terrible poet and harry lives in the now and they have six weeks to fall in love but, really, it only takes six seconds. bookshop meets military meets summer romance au ft. marlboros, the backstreet boys, and underrated literary devices.

  • It’s been over a year since I’ve properly read this all the way and I can still see parts of it as vividly as if it had been last night. Harry’s hair, cigarette smoke curling upwards, hardwood floors, the rhythm of Harry’s feet as he runs to stay in shape for the job that will take him away from Louis, the feeling of seconds slipping away, and each of them more precious for being so few in number. This is one of those fics that made me nostalgic for somewhere I’d never been - except who hasn’t felt as though time was moving simultaneously quickly and too slowly, as though there is something precious that could fall apart at any second? And that’s one of many things this fic does beautifully: gives us the universality of their story, and reminding us of our own.

Auf Wiedersehen, Sweetheart by @conscious–ramblings - M, 19k - Louis and Harry had been childhood best friends, but had been separated by evacuation as the city they grew up in was destroyed around them. Now, twelve years later, they are both back in London, and through chance they meet again. In a time when you can’t admit to being gay, for fear of arrest, admitting to your best friend that you love them seems like an insurmountable obstacle.Featuring boxer Harry and mechanic Louis, much pining, and a lot of post war Britain

  • There’s often a moment in fic where they’re trying to figure out if the other one is gay and/or available, that’s full of a certain kind of tentative hope because there’s some kind of attraction there and what if, what if it was everything they think it might be? This fic takes that to 11 in the most meaningful way, because it’s the 40s, and being gay is a crime, and it’s not a question of whether they’re reading the right signals - neither of them can afford to send any - but of trying to accept that it could never, can never be. Set against absolutely simmering chemistry (the moment Louis first sees Harry in the ring is a thing I’m still not over) and wonderful research and settings (loved the feel of it, the way it all came to life, how present the remnants of the war were as they went about their lives) and fab secondary characters (Niall is a gem, and Liam is so how I think of him, and really everyone was just perfect) and this incredible click where you can feel the ease and understanding between them, feel the sense that they are destined and absolutely belong together…it takes that tension and longing, already at an 11, to a 12, and the ending is cathartic and beautiful and means so much more for knowing how rare and lucky and precious that moment is, and how much they’re willing to risk, and how it’s kinds of risk that are sometimes very specific to being queer in a moment when it’s illegal and how many of them are universal, and how incredible and enormous and moving a thing it is when both kinds of risk pay off.

Don’t Look Down by zarah5 - M, 92k - AU. In which Louis is a solicitor at one of London’s most prestigious law firms and Harry happens to apply for the position as his trainee. And everyone else is around, too.

  • Harry is unbelievably charming here, and it makes total sense that Louis falls for him, and as the story unfolds the clarity and meaningfulness of their connection gets more and more apparent even as Louis is fighting it tooth and nail. But it’s not miscommunication and it’s not self-loathing, it’s that Louis’ reasons are genuinely thoughtful and important (professional ethics!!!!!! With real implications!!!!) and that they’re genuinely in a difficult position and can’t be together without betraying things that mean a lot to both of them, which made me love this version of him even more and root for them that much harder. And I was already rooting for them pretty damn hard. They fit together beautifully from the first, understand each other on so many levels, are drawn together just magically…and then there are these beautiful moments (Venice omg) and heart-wrenching moments (after that dinner and that one morning and then that other one omg) and hold-your-breath moments (what is Louis gonna dooooo) and heart-pounding momebts, and I could not put it down.

Fake you’re full and feel tomorrow by theglitterbee - NC-17, 21k - Louis is a high class prostitute and the best at what he does. Harry is a hard to please 17 year old who wants to give himself completely to another man. [It contains prostitution, d/s, daddy kink, silly banter and two idiots in love.](The one with the text messages.)

  • listen this is gonna sound like a weird rec but bear with me. this fic was one of the first 1d fics I read, and on face is almost entirely made of things i don’t like, and yet, here it is. It did that alchemical thing where it just worked and it did all these things really well - like daddy kink was 100% squick for me before this and it’s still like 80% squick but this fic explained it in such a way that i got it and could understand it and see why it worked for them and what it meant for them and that psychology made it work (and made me get why it was hot? which is pretty massive for something in the squick category). and i was hesitant about their ages but it wound up being (i think not unrealistically) part of a fundamental kind of self-discovery that was part of why things between them felt so critical and important. and i was v skeptical about social media stuff in fic but this one did it so well that i got it and felt like it really enriched the story and showed a particular kind of progress and dynamic in their interactions that needed to be done that way (and wound up being really cool and impressive). and i was nervous about the potential for the dynamics to not work but they are both full people who needed each other in this very specific way and fit together beautifully and it did some of the best stuff kink fics do imo, where the kink reveals something about who they are and what they need and why they work and who they are individually and together, and so here we are, a fic with tags i wouldn’t usually touch, reccing away and considering a reread. this kind of rec can be kind of ~, i know, but the tl;dr is that this fic is so good it overcame every hesitation and left me totally engaged and impressed and invested.

Hold Me Closer by balanceds - NC-17, 36.5k - Louis Tomlinson is one of the most promising dancers of the English National Ballet, on track to become the youngest principal dancer in the company’s history. That is, until forces conspire to significantly complicate his life, including: a surprise ballet, an unfairly attractive guest choreographer, and being pushed into a rivalry with his best mate. Featuring lots of wine, dancing, pining, and a happy ending.

  • I was so surprised when I looked up the word count for this bc I would have sworn it was at least twice as longc there is so much story, and so much development, and so many moments that stick that. Watching Louis come to terms with who he was as a dancer and and person was this beautiful process that was so rewarding to read, and it was unusual and fresh in this way I really want to talk about but really don’t want to spoil. Along the way there is spectacular chemistry, zayn and Louis taking on gay swan lake, so much yearning and despair and happiness and reckoning and growth, an amazing and deeply satisfying Simon moment, and one of those h/l relationships where they make each other strong.

like a boomerang by @youwilll- M, 52k - AU in which Harry gets trapped in a lift, Louis gets stuck in a Wednesday, and it’s always February 2nd. Until it isn’t.

  • This fic is so so utterly charming in like nine different ways. Harry and Louis slot together so beautifully you can practically hear the click, and then they do it again and again and somehow every time feels fresh and important, and through it all the stakes get bigger as Louis contemplates the meaning of their repeated day and all of these deep questions sneak in, and a bit of a mystery, and a bunch of self-discovery, and a bunch of personal growth as Louis learns and thinks, really thinks, about what he needs to do, and realizes how willing he is to do it. It was so perfectly balanced between being gentle and exciting, between destiny and action, between grand gestures and quiet moments, and it settled like a warm blanket and I looked forward to every chapter so much.  And then, at the end…it was one of those stories that made me want to add and place to my travel list because the relevant moments are so well located and satisfying that you just want to be there, and it captured this particular instant - the way it wound sound and smell and how the air would feel and the electricity of it - so vividly. Lovely through and through.

Love Is A Human Right by @conscious–ramblings- M, 41k - The one where Louis has spent years getting over his ex, Harry Styles, and was almost successful. That is until Harry is elected as an MP, and Louis is given the task of getting him to support an Act of Parliament. Through tears and arguments and a heavy dose of LGBTQ+ politics, their lives finally line up. Will Louis be able to forgive? Will they still want the same thing? It’s difficult to let go of five years of hurt, but even more difficult to be close to the love of your life and let them walk away again.

  • This fic is basically everything I want in a fic, but together so amazingly well that I would never be able to put into a prompt because it’s the *how* that makes it so perfect. I mean, politics, check, LGBTQ politics, check, larry, check, vivid settings, check, emotional stakes, check, pining, check, everything, check. But the kicker is the beautiful complexity to all of it, that the story really truly understands the complexity of coming out and why people  do and why they don’t and what it mean and how it works and the ways it plays out in queer communities, and these gay leads aren’t incidentally gay, but engaged in identity and politics in a way that feels true and resonant, and that manages to both say really important things about queer communities and tell a beautiful love story about coming to terms with who you are and what you stand for and how love shapes (but doesn’t always determine, and I love that about this fic too) your priorities. Then add some simmering UST and simmering RST (hot damn i mean really) and viscerally, deliciously painful pining and hilarious side plots (SGIL!! Ziam!! Nick’s guessing games!!) and a background story that had my heart twisting for them from the first and settings that felt so real they were popping back into my head for weeks and just…superb. Superb.

a prayer for which no words exist by @elianefics - M, 65k - “Louis is a few seconds away from blowing up a rather important section of the New York subway when he sees Harry for the first time.” (part one of the landscapes of war series)

  • War!AU in NYC! Another one that I will admit fit my interests beautifully but it’s the execution that makes it work so beautifully. From the second they meet, there’s an urgency and fragility to Harry and Louis’ relationship that is a perfect fit for the politics and the newness of it all. At the same time, their connection is so certain and solid, and whether they’re waking up in the Brooklyn penthouse loft that I am still not over or getting ready to run into battle, their love casts everything else into relief and brings out some of he human consequences to why people fight and what they have to gain or lose, and shows what all they’re risking. Left me breathless in the best ways, and so glad to have gone on this journey.

Pull Me Under by zarah5 - NC-17, 140k - AU. As the first British footballer to come out at the prime of his career,  it helps that Louis Tomlinson is in a long-term, committed  relationship. Even if that relationship is fake. (Featuring Niall as Louis’ favourite teammate, Liam as Louis’ agent, and Zayn as Liam’s boyfriend, who just happens to be good friends with one Harry Styles.)

  • This was the fic that tipped me right over the precipice and properly into the fandom; how could I not rec it? Even if I wasn’t personally attached, how could I not rec it? It’s so bloody beautiful, watching Louis come to terms with the idea of being out, and to take steps towards it, and to see how his interactions with Harry change that and what develops between them. The pacing is amazing, the depiction of internalized homophobia is chest-tightening in the good illustrative moving way, the world is so immersive (like I went to get the link and 20 minutes later I was still reading and totally entranced), and their relationship 100% made my heart sing, in both the big triumphant moments and the little ones.

things have gotten closer to the sun by starseas - M, 49k - it’s strange, making the choice to face his past—it almost feels like he’s heading for the sun straight on, like he’s screaming come on and burn me, i deserve it.-when a solar flare is announced to end the world in twelve days, harry reunites with the people that he used to know better than the back of his own hand.

  • I’m not even entirely sure what to say about this fic that won’t give it away or send people running because here’s the thing: it is heartbreaking. It is worth it. It is sad, yes. It is also exhilarating and beautiful and about why love, platonic and romantic, makes the risks worthwhile, and how we know, viscerally know what is important to us. Real talk pt. 1: read it because I had terrible pms and really needed to cry. Real talk pt. 2: it worked, in that very particular way thar also made me sit and think about who and what is really important and had me sobbing in the best, most cathartic way. That lasting, deep way that’s making my chest a little tight just thinking about it, but that also means that I can smell the snow and feel the frost and see the brilliance of the sun and feel the boys’ love as - more - constant than the sun, and what the heck else could you ask for?

These Inconvenient Fireworks by mdasch and everydayslike - NC-17, 190k - Future AU in which nobody tries out for X Factor but the boys end up finding one other eventually anyway. Louis is a jaded bastard who owns a cat named Duchess and teaches drama to teenagers, Harry is an idealistic aspiring photographer/part-time footy coach, Zayn teaches English lit and wears leather jackets, Liam saves people from burning buildings, and Niall is Niall.

  • this is one of the top ten most affecting things i have ever read in my life. i don’t know how. i don’t know why. i do know that i couldn’t put it down for days and wound up finishing it in a blanket fort on a friend’s couch at 4am, literally doing that feet-kicking thing where you’re so full of feelings you can’t actually physically contain it but have to be quiet and still because the rest of the world is asleep during your emotional revelation. it restored my faith in love and hope. i am still not recovered from the thing on the soccer field at night before the train or the star tattoo or harry taking picture after picture or basically anything about it. clear your calendar if you have to but read this fic and then pls come talk to me about it because like i said i am deeply affected and possibly forever changed.

walk my days on a wire by sunshiner - M, 38.5k - Harry hums, staring at his hands in his lap, and Louis can still feel their smoothness, how solid they were in between his own. “Do you think it’s the same for us? Are we here only because of the likeliness of our jobs? Of our lives?”
“We’re here because we have inventive managers,” Louis says, giving Harry’s leg a little nudge with his knee, but all that’s going around in his head is, I think I’d be in the same spot in every possible universe.  or, when actor Louis Tomlinson used to daydream about dating Harry Styles, this is not what he had in mind.

  • There’s this one moment in Cannes when they kiss and I both really want to talk about it bc it is amazing and really would not dream of talking about bc you have to go read it yourself. So like the summary suggests, they’re in a fake relationship, and they know that that’s what it’s supposed to be, but of course - of course - there’s more to it than that. Like instantly more in this way that you can feel rolling off the screen, that is about sexual chemistry but also a certain kind of very precious fitting together. Watching them see themselves through each others eyes is beautiful, as is seeing how much it means to them to have someone else who understands the pressured of this rarefied, panopticonic world of celebrity, and who loves and validates the ott celeb performer and the human underneath the facade. It’s interesting to read in the context of this fandom, and entirely universal at the same time - who doesn’t want a partner who can love them at their most extreme and most mundane, most accomplished and most afraid, right in the middle of a stadium or right in the middle of taking up the whole damn bed?

whispering of fields half-sown by @elianefics- PG-13, 7k - “And how ironic is it that even now, at the end of all things, Louis’ mere presence makes Harry want to believe that anything is possible again. That the earth isn’t close to collapsing on itself, that the tomorrows are bright and shining and full of promises. Harry hates Louis for giving him something to look forward to when the sky only keeps getting darker. Harry loves Louis for it. ”[All of his boys come back to him in the end, but it’s Louis, Harry has been waiting for all this time.]

  • heartbreaking, lush, moving apocalypse!fic wherein it is absolutely the case that through fire and water and earthquakes and ice, there is one person Harry needs by his side. There’s Liam and Niall and Zayn, too, and what it would mean for all of them to say goodbye, really goodbye, who they all are and what those friendships mean. And Louis. Oh, Louis. My eyes got mysteriously damp in the really good way, and it made me want to sit down and write just to make words like this. The conversation at the end of this stayed with me like whoa, and my chest is getting a little tight thinking about it again. That may make some people want to X it off the list; think twice before you do. This is worth it.

Young & Beautiful by velvetoscar - M, 227.5k - Louis, to his horror, attends an elitist university in which the name Zayn Malik means something, Niall Horan doesn’t stop talking, there are pianos everywhere, and Harry Styles, only son of a drug-addled, clinically insane ex-rocker, has a perfect smile and empty eyes.

  • absolutely beautiful. so vivid i dreamt about it and then went and got a whole bunch of flowers and spent a while wandering around in fancy clothes just because it felt as though i was already living in the story so why not? And how could you not want to be part of this world that is complex and nuanced and subtle and gorgeous (which is not a way i expected to feel about a fic about rich kids btw but this fic makes them so full and the story so engaging that it happened and not only a little). Dimensional characters, wonderful tension, simmering slow burn, complexity, believable and complex psychological motivations,  theme parties, a falcon named cleopatrick, long nights, loaded touches, meaningful subplots, love, resilience. The only possible complaint is it made me want a champagne fountain, and that is not any sort of complaint at all. (lmk if you have a champagne fountain though, it’s been a few weeks and i am really still about wanting to live inside this fic, and also champagne)
Sanctuary

Request: “How about Draco x reader, where she loses her virginity to him? love your writing ♥”

Pairing: Draco Malfoy x Reader

Word Count: 2.2k

Warnings: SMUT!!! BEST FRIENDS TURNED LOVERS!!! DO I HAVE TO SAY ANY MORE?

Originally posted by mistakeoftheconstellation

You couldn’t sleep tonight. It was just one of those nights, where the shadows of trees blowing in the breeze danced across the wall, their movement as restless as your being. You had pulled your wand out, practicing light charms. The beams of light bounced on the chilly Autumn air, the wind billowing your curtains as you had forgotten to close your window.

The white bunny of light that had been hopping around your room instantly faded at the sound of sobs. Frowning, you slipped out of the warmth of your bed, following the sound to your window. Poking your head out, below you could spot a flash of white-blonde hair under the moonlight, a face wet with tears and reddened eyes. He was pacing, as if contemplating coming up.

“Draco?” Your voice was quiet, heart already clenching at the sight of him. “What’s wrong? Come up.”

You took a seat on the sill, watching as he scaled the scaffolding under your window. Thank Merlin your mother had decided she wanted climbing Ivy on this side of the house, since a month ago the walls had been bare and there would be no direct way for Draco to come up. You helped pull him in as he reached your window.

There was a moment of silence as you both shared concerned looks, your hands immediately cupping his face and wiping his tears. Draco’s cheeks were freezing, but trailing your fingers down to his neck you found his body to be muggy. You collapsed into him, head pressed to his chest and listening to the unsteadiness of his heartbeat as he wrapped around you. You tilted your head up, pressing short kisses all over his face, covering him with affection. You did so until you too were in tears.

Keep reading

Tom Holland Imagine: All Too Well

Summary: This is based off of the song All Too Well by Taylor Swift. So be ready for a sad ending… Im sowwy…

A/N: Idk why I wrote this tbh I didn’t need this sadness in my life…

Warnings: None

_______________________________________________________________________

“I walked through the door with you, the air was cold… but something bout it felt like home somehow…” 

 "Come on, love, you’re going to freeze to death!“ Tom called.

 I smiled at him and ran up the sidewalk to join him at the door of his parents’ house. Tom sat my bags on the ground and reached into his pocket to pull out his key. As soon as the door was open, the loud scream of Tom’s name filled both of our ears as his family came running around the corner to take in the rare sight of Tom Holland standing inside their home. 

Tom hugged all of them before turning to introduce me. 

 "Guys, this is Y/N. The love of my life.” Tom said with a wide smile across his face. 

 Tom’s mother smiled at me before pulling me into a loving hug. 

 "Oh, I can just tell you’re going to fit right in with us! Tom, take her bags up to her room! We’re going to give her a tour really fast!“ 

 I smiled at Tom before following his mother down the hallway. 

 "I told you they’d love you.” Tom whispered in my ear as he pressed a kiss to my temple.

 "Autumn leaves falling down like pieces into place and I can picture it after all these days…“ 

 Tom’s hand held mine as we walked down the path. His other hand held the leash that Tessa was on. I pressed myself into his side as another cold strike of the wind hit us. 

 "I told you to bring your coat, love." 

 "I know, but it’s not that bad when the wind isn’t blowing. And besides, I have you beside me to keep me warm." 

 Tom smiled down at me and kissed my forehead as we continued our walk through the woods. Tom let go of my hand and wrapped his arm around me as I hugged his torso. We both walked in silence as the leaves began to fall around us. 

 "This is my absolute favorite time of year. It’s so beautiful, I could just stay out here and watch it all day.” I said. 

 Tom hummed in agreement. 

 "Well, as great as that would be, cuddling up by a warm fire with some hot chocolate is pretty great too.“ 

 I laughed and hugged Tom even tighter. Tom then stopped walking and turned to face me. 

 "I have to tell you something, Y/N…" 

 "Okay… what is it?" 

 "I-I love you." 

 I stared up at Tom in shock. Neither one of us had said those three words yet. I could tell Tom was growing anxious by my silence. 

 "I love you, too, Tom." 

 Tom’s smile grew huge and he pulled me into a kiss as the leaves continued to fall around us. 

 "Cause there we are again on that little town street, you almost ran the red cause you were looking over at me…" 

 "Why does Harrison have to live so far away from you?” I whined as we continued on the long drive towards our friend’s house. 

 "Because that’s the house his mum and dad bought.“ Tom whined back. 

 I giggled and reached over to turn the music up. I began to quietly sing the song that was playing in the radio. My feet were placed on his dashboard. Even though he hated when I did that, he had given up on trying to keep me from doing. Because I always did it. 

 "Uh, Tom? Why aren’t you slowing down? Tom! That’s a red light! Slow down!" 

Tom then hit the breaks as hard as he could so that we wouldn’t fly out and get hit by other cars. 

 "What was that all about?” I asked as I put my hands on my hips. 

 "Sorry, love. You’re just really beautiful. The wind was blowing through your hair and you’re voice, God your voice. I just couldn’t look away…“ he said as he began to blush. 

 "Alright, lover boy. Just pay attention to the road.” I said, causing us both to laugh. 

 “Photo album on the counter, your cheeks are turning red…" 

 Tom groaned as his mother continued to flip through the old photo album.

 "And here’s Tom after he lost his first tooth. He got so scared and thought he was dying! He woke up and screamed at the top of his lungs. It was hilarious!”

 Tom then stood up and grabbed the photo album from his mother. 

 "Please mum, not now!“ 

 Tom’s cheeks were bright red which made me and his mother laugh even harder. 

 "Well, I think you were very adorable, Tom.” I said as I leaned across and kissed his cheek. 

 The action only made his cheeks turn redder. 

 "Oh! I have to show you the one of him from the time he put my make up on himself!“ Nikki said as she raced off towards her room. 

 "NO!” Tom screamed as he chased his mom down the hallway. 

 "Cause there we are again in the middle of the night, we’re dancing round the kitchen in the refrigerator light…“ 

 I had woken him up after I had a bad dream. Tom immediately took me to the kitchen to heat me up a glass of warm milk to help me go back to sleep. As we waited for the milk to warm on the stove, Tom pulled me into his chest and began to dance with me around the kitchen. 

 "And you can tell everybody that this is your song…” Tom quietly sang as he twirled me around. 

 Tom knew how much I loved this song solely from the fact that Ewan McGregor sounds like an absolute angel when he sings it in Moulin Rouge! Tom immediately became jealous the first time I expressed my crush on Ewan McGregor because he had played his son in The Impossible. Although Tom wasn’t as talented in Ewan, I loved his version a million times more because it was coming from him. 

 "Maybe we got lost in translation maybe I asked for too much… but maybe this thing was a masterpiece till you tore it all up…“ 

 "Tom, I’m not comfortable with this… I want you to follow your dreams, but this is too much. Please, just be honest with me. Is it true?" 

 Tom stared at me. His silence was all I needed. I slid out from the booth in the coffee shop and began to walk towards the exit. As I reached the door, I turned to face Tom one last time. He had his head placed in his hands. 

 "I just wanted you to love me.” I said to him before I walked out. 

 “You call me up again just to break me like a promise, so casually cruel in the name of being honest…“ 

 I hadn’t left my house in days. The thought of seeing Tom was too much for me to handle. I still love him. I think I always will. I felt my phone ring beside me and I answered it stupidly without looking at the caller ID. 

 "Hello?" 

 "Y/N? Thank god…" 

 "Oh.. hi, Tom." 

 "Listen love, I know I hurt you but she meant nothing to me. I love you. I will always love you. You’re the only girl I’ve ever wanted! I was drunk and I hadn’t seen you in weeks and I was so lonely and she looked so much like you. I love you. I only want you. Please give me a second chance, I won’t let you down." 

 I felt a single tear fall down my cheeks as I heard his pleas. My heart was pounding against my chest, begging my brain to just forgive him so that it’s suffering could end, but I knew I had to stay strong and stick to my morales, because if I didn’t, I would lose who I am. 

 "Tom, never call me again." 

 And with that, I hung up. 

 "Time won’t fly its like I’m paralyzed by it, I’d like to be my old self again, but I’m still trying to find it…” 

 I spent what felt like years trying to fall back into my old life, but Tom was everywhere. His new success with Spider-Man had his face plastered on every magazine. I knew it had only been a few weeks since the phone call, but it felt like centuries. Tom had invaded my heart and I knew he would never truly leave it. I walked down the path that I had walked many times with him and Tessa. The same path where we first told each other “I love you”. I felt more tears slip from my eyes. I felt my heart break a million times more as I saw the leaves fall around me. Memories of the time I spent with him were constantly running through my mind, reminding me of what I had lost. I wish I had taken him back. What he had done was wrong, but if I hadn’t have been so stubborn I know we could’ve overcome it, but now I’ve ruined it. He’s probably already got another girl wrapped up in his arms, whispering all the sweet things that used to be for my ears only. He probably took her down this very path to tell her he loved her. He probably dances with her in the middle of the night and sings to her now. These thoughts ran through my mind as a constant reminder that Tom Holland was no longer mine.

Stay

Originally posted by geezerwench

Originally posted by mrstane

Request: Imagine your Jax’s best friend and your back in town and he begs you to stay.


I decided to make this long instead of breaking it into parts, its 10,000+ words, let me know what you all think!

 Sorry I’m not writing as often,but please be patient and I’ll get there. Thank you for all your support. I hope you enjoy this. xx

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Jackson Nathaniel Teller get your ass back here right now!”
Jax froze midstep and hung his head whilst you fought to keep the smug smile off your face as you slowly crept forwards.
“You too, (Y/F/N), (Y/L/N)!”
A groan left your lips and slowly in sync, both of you turned to face the wrath of Gemma Teller.
She stood in the doorway of her house, hands on her hips, elbows out, and an angry flint in her eyes.
Jax sighed and nudged you with his elbow.
You exchanged a dreaded glance with him and together you walked towards his mother.
“Either of you little shits wanna tell me why i have three missed calls from the principal?”
Gemma said, her voice stern and her eyes burnt through the both of you.
Even on a good day, you knew better than to mess with Gemma, and today was definitely not a good day.
“It was nothing, Gem.” You said and fluttered your eyelashes pleadingly, hoping that your puppy-dog effect might rub off on her. Of course it didn’t work. This was Gemma Teller, after all.
Gemma raised her eyebrows at you and her gaze lingered on you before she glanced at her son.
“Jackson?”
Jax sighed and rubbed his hand through his thick blonde hair.
“It was nothing Ma. Just some kids getting smart. We handled it.”
Gemma stared him down with pursed lips till he looked at his feet and Gemma leant against the door frame, crossing her arms over her chest.
“Who threw the first punch?” She asked.
You looked at Jax and he met your eye before his infamous smirk spread across his lips.
“She did.” Jax said and nodded towards you.
His mother glanced you over and reached her hands towards you.
She grasped her hands either side of your face and leant close before pressing a kiss to your cheek.
“Good girl.” She said.
You grinned and Jax laughed beside you.
“Now get your ass home before I have your parents calling me too.”
You nodded and waved goodbye to Gemma.
Jax threw his arm over your shoulder and walked along side you as you walked down the driveway., the afternoon sun shining down on you between the trees.
“I told you she wouldn’t be mad.” Jax said and you scoffed and laughed.
“You think I was worried? You shoulda seen your face!” You teased and Jax laughed too.
Both of you walked along the pavement as the sun shined down on you, teasing each other and laughing as he walked you home.
Eventually you stopped outside your house and you could both see your father, peering out at you through the gap in the curtains.
You rolled your eyes and turned to Jax.
“See you tomorrow?”
“Me and Ope will pick you up.” He confirmed.
You nodded and smiled at your best friend and he smiled back, the same smile that made your heart swoon.
And you walked into your house, leaving a sixteen year old Jax Teller on the street, watching after you and hoping that maybe one day his best friend would be his old lady.

You had grown up in Charming, born and raised and you loved the little town and all its unique quirks.
The sun was always shining, the weather was always warm and the towns people were always smiling. Well, almost always..
It was the roar of motorcycles flooding down Main Street that changed their faces from happy and content smiles to disapproving frowns and glares.
The Sons of Anarchy had always done their part in Charming, helping out at fundraisers and the town knew they could rely on the club when times got tough. Yet they often seemed to forget that, and seemed to focus on the danger that emitted from them.
Your father was one of those people, and he had been furious the first day he saw Jax Teller and Opie Winston walk you home from school.
He had warned you your whole life to stay away from ‘boys like that’, and he had lived his whole life in fear of the Sons of Anarchy.
They were gunrunners, criminals, outlaws and killers and he didn’t want his precious daughter to be mixed up with such horrid people.
But when you were seven years old and the boys in your class had stolen your backpack and had been tossing it to each other while you cried, it had been Jax and Opie that had stopped them and made sure no one ever messed with you again.
And from that day on the three of you had been your own little gang.
Your father still didn’t approve and you weren’t sure he ever would, but you didn’t care.
Because when you were with them you didn’t feel like a little girl that couldn’t defend herself.
When you were with them you weren’t afraid of anything.
And you had grown to be tough and strong, after Gemma took you under her wing.
You didn’t have a motherly figure in your life after your mom had passed away and your father had never even dreamt of being with another woman. But Gemma showed you how to be a girl that no one would mess with and you would be eternally grateful to her for transforming you from an innocent lamb into a lioness.
It was only inevitable that you’d fall in love with Jax at some point.
He was carefree, the prince of Charming, and anywhere he walked he left a trail of chaos and girls practically drooling over him.
He was charming and funny, smart, caring, ridiculously handsome and confident and he was fiercely loyal.
You were close with Opie too, of course, but it was Jax that made your heart skip a beat and when he was around somehow you struggled to find words, as the thoughts of him filled your mind.
He was your best friend, the love of your life, the prince of Charming. And you, you were the Girl Next Door. Well, technically you lived down the street, but you knew you would never be good enough for him, that you’d never be his princess.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Your cheeks were stiff from dried tears and you stared at the sky, watching the sun slowly fade into the horizon.
Opie passed the joint to you and you took a long drag before passing it to Jax, who sat on the other side of you.
The three of you sat in silence, unsure of the right words to say.
Honestly you didn’t want them to say anything. You didn’t want anyone to say anything.
Nothing anyone said could change what had happened.
Your father was dead. You had been the one to find him, seated at the kitchen table, gun in his hand and a bullet hole through his head.
He had never really recovered after losing your mother and he had struggled raising you alone. Still, you never thought he would leave you. At least not like that anyway.
The smoke filled your lungs but your body remained numb.
And so the three of you sat in silence, on the concrete ledge of the roof of the funeral home, dressed all in black as you mourned the loss of your father.
Jax hadn’t left your side since you’d found your father, dead in the kitchen and you knew both himself and Opie had been uncomfortable, attending the funeral of your father, a man who had disapproved, no, hated them.
But they had decided to attend, to support their best friend.
Jax knew what it was like to lose a father and you were eternally grateful for his support.
They had stood either side of you as you read the passage in front of your fathers friends and family, and they had sat beside you while you sobbed over the freshly covered grave.
But now your tears had dried out and the reality was sinking in.
Your mother was gone, your father was gone, and you had no family left.
At least not in Charming.
That was why your Aunty was shipping you off, forcing you to move across the country to live with her.
“When do you leave?” Jax asked quietly, his voice breaking the silence.
You glanced at him and met his gaze, his blue eyes filled with sorrow.
“Tomorrow.” You whispered, your voice cracking slightly.
Jax nodded and wrapped his arm around your shoulder and you rested your head on his shoulder.
Opie squeezed your hand gently before standing and heading downstairs to find a drink, leaving the two of you alone.
For a while you sat in silence, his arm around you as you stared out at the horizon.
Everything seemed so fragile, so small. Every moment was fleeting, passing by and you weren’t sure if any of it really mattered anymore.
“I love you, (y/n).” Jax whispered.
A sad smile formed on your lips and you nodded against him.
“I know.” You whispered.
You knew he loved you, as a friend.
But even now, as you sat at your fathers funeral, the only thing you wanted was Jax. For him to love you as more than a friend.
But you were leaving.
And he was staying here.
The rest of the night you stayed on the roof, until the early morning and at some point you had fallen asleep, wrapped in each others arms. A perfect way to spend your last night in Charming, wrapped in the arms of the boy were hopelessly in love with.

8 YEARS LATER

“Back in black! I hit the sack, Ive been too long Im glad to be back.”
You sung at the top of your lungs as the music poured out of the speakers and your car sped along the familiar roads.
It was only fitting to play such a song as you drove, heading for the town you’d left so many years ago.
You never had made it back to Charming after you had left that morning so many years ago.
Something had always stopped you. Maybe the emptiness that filled your heart every time you thought of your father and the way he had passed, or the heartache you felt when you thought of Jax, imagining him with random girls.
You had no right to be jealous really, it had been eight years since you’d left and you’d kept in contact at first, but eventually you had drifted apart.
The last you heard was that Jax and Opie were prospecting, but it had been years since you’d heard from either of them and you wondered if they’d still be around,or  if they’d even remember you.
You thought about them often, remembering the mischief the three of you used to get up to. the nights you would spend staring up at the sky, or the afternoons you’d spend on the back of their bikes, speeding along the streets with the wind blowing in your hair.
But you had a new life now, a good job, a good apartment. You didn’t have a boyfriend but you didn’t particularly want one.
You were fiercely independent and you did well on your own. There was even talk of a promotion coming up and you knew you were in the perfect position for it.
It had taken you by surprise when you’d received the phone call from the council in Charming, informing you that the tenants of your fathers house had left it in a mess.
He had left you the house in his will and you had become the official owner when you turned 21, but back then the thought of returning to your hometown had been too painful, so you’re Aunt had helped you hire an agency and rent the property out.
But it was time to sell it. There was no point in leaving it with strangers when you could benefit from selling it. You could even use the money to buy your own house in the city, or open your very own business. It was time to move on.
And as you drove a mixture of emotions flooded through you.
Nerves, excitement, fear.
You didn’t know what to expect and one part of you was praying you would run into Jax, and reunite just like old times while the other part of you prayed you wouldn’t.
You knew he would have an old lady by now and you weren’t sure how you felt about it.
He would always be the one that got away, and you don’t think you could truly ever be over the feelings you had for Jackson Teller.
You car sped along the road and before you knew it you passed the familiar ‘Welcome to Charming’ sign.
The town hadn’t changed much and you drove through Main Street, eyeing the familiar shop fronts and the new ones too.
Charming certainly had a certain ‘charm’ about it and no matter where in the world you went, it would always be home.
You knew you couldn’t put it off much longer and you finally turned into the street on which you had lived so many years ago.
You drove past the picket fences and the perfectly trimmed hedges, the front lawns with kids playing outside, under the sprinklers as they laughed in the sun.
Your heart leapt into your throat as you drove past the Teller house and you couldn’t help but glance at the half dozen bikes parked out front.
You gulped and gripped the steering wheel til your knuckles turned white and you drove on and eventually you turned into the driveway of your fathers house.

Birds chirped outside the window and you groaned.
You never had been a morning person but last night you had gotten barely any sleep.
It was hard for you, to be back in this house and the memories had haunted you all night long. It still smelt the same. At least you thought it did and waves of nostalgia kept hitting you, desperate for a time when this was your home.
You sighed and rolled out of bed and rubbed your eyes before yawning and stretching your arms.
Of course, you hadn’t thought about bringing any home appliances with you.
You had only packed a few bags of clothes, unsure of how long you were intending to stay for.
But you’d forgotten that the house was empty, including no furniture, no cutlery, and no fucking coffee.
You rummaged through one of your bags and yanked out a towel and headed for the shower.
The local diner used to make the best coffee in town and you hoped that that was one thing that hadn’t changed over the years.
After a quick shower you tugged on your ripped skinny jeans and pulled an old band t-shirt over your head before shaking out your damp hair and letting it fall down your back.
There was no time for makeup, you needed coffee desperately so you grabbed your sunglasses and your keys and headed for your car.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The diner had kept its word; it still had the best coffee in town.
But honestly, it could have been the worst, you were too tired to notice. You only craved the hit caffeine.
The old woman behind the counter had remembered you and had insisted on feeding you a full breakfast, the Charming Classic, complete with two eggs, toast, hash browns, bacon, sausages, and grilled tomatoes.
By the time you’d finished your plate you could barely more, you were that full and you slid out of the booth before paying for your meal at the counter.
By now the sun was out and the heat hit you in the face as you walked out of the diner, the bell on the door chiming behind you.
The street was already alive with the hustle and bustle of the morning.
You glanced around the street and smiled to yourself as you looked over the hanging flowers and the store fronts. It was good to be home.
Across the street Jax pulled off his gloves and stuffed them into his pockets.
He lifted his hands, littered with rings and removed his helmet.
The wind blew his blonde hair and he slicked it back.
Chibs and Tig were to his left and Juice was to his right and they too removed their helmets and placed them on their bikes.
Main Street was already buzzing with people and Jax ignored the nervous yet curious looks coming from the locals.
He scanned the street, looking for Hale, when a girl caught his eye.
For a moment, his breath caught in his throat as he looked at her.
Her back was facing him and her hair hung loosely down her back. There was something about her, he felt like he knew her, but he needed her to turn around.
“Jax! Let’s go, brother.” Chibs called and Jax snapped back to attention.
“Yeah.” Jax said and stood straight.
He followed his brothers up the street but he couldn’t help but look back.
And as he did, the girl turned flashing her face only for a moment and Jax froze in place.
But almost as quickly as he saw her, she was gone, turning a corner into a store.
“You okay man? You look like you’ve seen a ghost.” Juice asked with an eyebrow arched.
Jax swallowed and nodded slowly.
“Something like that.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ever since you were young you had always had a habit of twiddling your thumbs when you were nervous. That, and blinking your eyelashes like an idiot.
And right now your thumbs were going wild and you were practically chewing your bottom lip off. To say you were nervous was an understatement and you wanted to start your car, turn around and drive away from here.
But you couldn’t put it off any longer.
You knew deep down you wanted to see him, needed to see him.
But you were filled with dread, knowing that a man like Jackson Teller wasn’t going to be single.
You wanted desperately to see that smile once more but you weren’t sure if you could face his girlfriend. Or worse, his old lady.
You sighed and pulled the keys out of the ignition.
It was now or never.
Before you could change your mind you stepped out of your car and closed the door behind you.
Teller Morrow hadn’t changed much from what you remembered and you glanced around the lot, taking in the sight of it.
Several bikes were lined up and you gulped as you looked at them warily.
It wasn’t too late to turn around.
There weren’t any members outside, and no one had seen you yet.
You could just turn around and walk right out of here.
You were debating your options in your head and you barely noticed when a car pulled in behind you. It was only when the door slammed shut that you turned around.
Your heart leapt into your throat and you stared wide eyed at Gemma Teller.
She stood in her class in ensemble: jeans and a black low cut top, flashing her cleavage and her scar. Her dark hair framed her face and she wore her usual large sunglasses.
You watched her as she shifted her hand bag on to her shoulder. She hadn’t seen you yet, or recognised you at least and your heart was beating rapidly.
“Hey Gem.” You said.
You cursed yourself, knowing how nervous your voice sounded.
Gemma glanced at you and lifted her glasses on top of her head.
“Well well, long time no see.”
You smiled and Gemma walked towards you, arms open wide and you embraced her hug. She had always been the closest thing you had to a motherly figure after your mom died and you hadn’t realised quite how much you had missed her after all these years.
She smelt the same as she used to, perfume and cigarettes and you hugged her tightly.
“What are you doing here, sweetheart?” She asked you as you parted and she placed her hands on her hips.
You ran your hand through your hair and glanced around the lot.
“I’m selling dads house, so I’m back in town for a while.” You told her truthfully.
You hadn’t intended to stay more than a week, but you had missed this town and the more time you were spending here the less rush you were in to leave.
Gemma nodded as her eyes ran over you.
You were just a teenager when you left, awkward and rebellious. But now you were a fully grown woman and your body had definitely filled out. You had curves now, in all the right places and you looked a hell of a lot different to when you left. But your eyes were the same, always sparkling and you still had the familiar traits Gemma remembered.
You had broken her sons heart when you left and she knew you probably had no idea of the hurt you had caused that boy.
“Well lets go inside. I, for one, could use a drink.” She winked at you and you grinned back.
Gemma linked her arm through yours and together you walked towards the clubhouse.
You had seen the number of bikes outside and your heart was beating rapidly in your chest.
You weren’t sure what type of welcome to expect.
Gemma must have sensed your nerves and she squeezed your arm gently before pushing open the door.

The smell hit you almost instantly and you felt a wave of nostalgia wash over you.
Alcohol, ciggarettes, and cheap perfume were the essence of the Clubhouses very own signature fragrance and you breathed it in deeply.
Your eyes scanned the room, taking in sight the empty table and sofas and the empty bar.
“They’re in Church.” Gemma told you and you nodded.
You were thankful you weren’t walking into a room full of Sons but now your nerves were back, knowing it was only those wooden doors that separated you from Jax. This was his territory, his home, and you were invading it. You weren’t sure if he’d even want to see you, let alone have you in his clubhouse.
“You wanna beer?” Gemma asked you.
“Please.” You nodded and smiled, following her to the bar.
Your eyes continued to scan the room and you looked the wall of framed mugshots, standing proud.
A smile formed on your lips as you ran your eyes over the familiar faces, and the unfamiliar ones.
You saw Opie’s and you smiled, looking at the man he had grown into.
The other faces passed you by as you looked at each of the frames and you gulped once you found Jax’s photo, sitting proud beneath the wooden SAMCRO sign.
He hadn’t changed much at all really, although you weren’t sure how old this photo was.
But his hair was still long, and blond, and those blue eyes of his pierced through you. You could recognise those eyes anywhere.
“How longs it been?”
Gemma broke your thoughts and you turned back to her, accepting the beer she was holding out.
“Eight years.” You said.
“Lot of shits changed in eight years.” Gemma said.
You smiled and nodded.
“I know.” You told her. Gemma had always had a way with words and you couldn’t help but feel there was a famous Gemma Teller lecture on the way.
But instead, she surprised you.
“He misses you.”
You looked at her, her dark eyes watching you closely and you knew she wasn’t lying.
But before you could speak you heard a door open and you turned almost instantly.
You didn’t recognise the first man that entered the room, and surely if you had known him you would recognise that mohawk. But his soft face was unfamiliar and  you only recognised the kutte on his shoulders.
He nodded towards Gemma and looked at you curiously before moving into the room, the rest of the club filing in behind him.
“Holy shit!”
Opie practically ran across the room, nearly bowling his old man over in the process and you  moved towards him, unable to keep a grin off your face.
He wrapped his arms around you and swept you off your feet into a tight bear hug.
You laughed as he squeezed you and eventually he placed you back on the ground, where he towered over you.
“Look at you, Ope! Your huge!” You said teasingly and squeezed his large biceps.
He laughed loudly and nudged you.
“Never thought I’d see your face round here again.” Opie said, his tone still light yet the both of you knew how much he meant his words.
You shrugged his comment off and grinned up at your old friend.
It had been years since you’d seen Opie and except the beard he hadn’t seemed to change all that much. His eyes seemed tired, and you could tell he had seen pain but there was still that light that had been there so many years ago.
Silence fell between you but it wasn’t uncomfortable.
Eventually more men filled the room and you glanced around,  the butterflies simultaneously returning to your stomach.
And then you saw him.
He walked out of the clubhouse, his head hung low as he blew out a cloud of smoke and passed a joint back to one of his Brothers. He walked with the same kind of swag he walked with as a teen and your heart was almost beating out of your chest when he glanced up and met your gaze.
Blue eyes pierced through you and he froze for a moment, his mouth dropping open as he took in the sight of you.
The rest of the room could have been on fire and you wouldn’t have noticed, the only thing you were focused on was Jax.
Slowly, he began to move towards you, his eyes never leaving yours and you gulped.
Opie glanced between the two of you, sensing the nervous tension in the air and he chuckled lightly before shaking his head and walking to the bar, leaving you to reunite with Jax.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“Hey.”
Your voice was brittle, nervous but just that one word echoed through him.
For years he had dreamt of this day, dreamt  that one day you would return, and you would stand in this club house once more.
But it had always been just a dream. Jax knew you would have no intention of coming back to this town that haunted you with memories and as you stood before him he fought desperately with his mind, begging for it not to be playing a trick on him.
Begging for this to be real.
He moved closer and his eyes only left yours to glance over your body quickly.
You but your lip nervously and you fluttered your eyelashes. Not in a flirtatious way, but in a way that you had always done when you were nervous.
“You gonna just stare at her?” Opies voice boomed from across the room, followed by laughter.
You laughed too and suddenly Jax knew he wasn’t dreaming.
A grin broke across his cheeks and suddenly his arms were around you, engulfing you entirely into his body.
He lifted you off the floor and squeezed you and you buried your face in his neck, letting his scent fill your lungs and you breathed him in.
Eventually he placed you back on the floor and he stepped back to look at you once more.
His grin never left his face and you stared into his eyes.
“Your back.” He spoke.
You nodded, your eyes never failing to leave his gaze.
“Ye ganna introduce the lass, Jackie?” A voice called from across the room and both of you glanced towards the man who spoke, his wide grin almost distracting you from the scars across his cheeks.
Jax laughed and threw his arm over your shoulder.
Together you walked towards the men.
Their faces were friendly yet curious to see what kind of girl could get both Opie and Jax to react like that.
Jax introduced you to his club, firing off a list of names you would have to ask him to repeat later on.
“And this is (y/n), an old friend.” Jax beamed and nudged you.
You couldn’t help a blush rising to your cheeks as you nodded to the smiling faces.
They welcomed you with cheers as they raised their beers in your direction.
“Come on, let me get you a drink.” Jax said and you followed him to the bar.
Gemma still sat, watching you with an amused look on her face and as Jax approached she stood, smoothing down her shirt and her jeans before pressing a kiss to her sons cheek.
“I’ll leave you two kids to it.” She said with a wink before sauntering off outside.
Jax chuckled and shook his head before passing you a beer and gesturing for you to sit.
You obliged and slid onto one of the barstools before taking a sip.
“So what brings you back here?” Jax asked, his haze falling bak onto you and he looked at you with furrowed brows.
You licked your lips as you placed your beer on the counter and swiped a loose strand of hair out of your face.
“I had some trouble with the tenants in dads old place, so I thought it was probably time to sell it on.” You said.
Jax nodded and took a swig of his beer.
“So your not staying?” He asked.
You shook your head and smiled sadly.
“I don’t think I could.” You said.
Jax studied you closely and he sensed the pain in your voice.
It was still a struggle for you, even after all these years to be back in a town that held such painful memories and that was clear to him. Yet he still couldn’t help feeling disappointed.
It didn’t seem fair that you would leave again, after only just coming back into his life after so many years.
But he nodded understandingly.
“How are you anyway? Couldn’t help but notice your kutte.” You said.
Jax laughed and glanced down at the Vice President patch on his leather and nodded.
“Yeah, its a new addition.” He said proudly.
You sat at the bar for a while, reminiscing on the old times with Jax and Opie joined you for a while before heading home to see his family.
Eventually though it was time for you to head home and you stood and smoothed down your hair.
Jax walked you out and neither of you spoke as you headed for your car.
The night air was crisp and cool and you shivered slightly in the breeze.
Jax noticed and put his arm around your waist, pulling you into his warmth as you walked.
“When do you leave?” Jax asked quietly.
You stopped in front of tour car and looked at him with a shrug.
“Im not sure. Maybe a couple of weeks.” You answered.
Jax nodded and leant against the car as you opened the door.
“You should come by the club tomorrow night. We’re having a party.” Jax said.
You smiled at him and nodded.
“I’ll try to make an appearance.” You winked and Jax smirked back at you.
“It was really good to see you, (y/n).” Jax said quietly.
“It was good to see you too, Jax.” You smiled back.
From the conversations you’d had with him tonight it seemed he was single, no old lady.
But you hadn’t exactly asked outright so you didn’t want tog et your hopes up. Yet you couldn’t help the feeling of hope that crept into your mind.
It was silly, of course. You were leaving. But you couldn’t help but want Jax to feel the same way, and you wanted nothing more than to reach out and touch him.
But you didn’t.
Instead, you slid into the seat of your car, waved goodbye to Jax and drove away.
And just like he had all this years ago, Jax watched you drive off. Only this time he felt something had changed.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It was past 9pm by the time you got home the next day and after fumbling with your keys and flicking the lights on you dumped the load of paperwork onto the floor.
Who knew selling a house would be such a pain in the ass.
You had spent all day with a real estate agent, going over the property and discussing the market.
You had been grumpy all day, after getting barely any sleep yet again, and the last thing you wanted to do was get dressed and go to a SAMCRO party.
You walked around the living room and drew the curtains before sitting on the floor in the middle of the room and opening the carton of chinese food you had bought in the way home.
It probably wasn’t a good idea for you to go to the party anyway, you thought to yourself.
You were only in town to sell this damned house and it would only be a couple of weeks before you left again. It had been nice, seeing Jax again after yearning for him for so long.
But who were you kidding?
He wouldn’t feel the same way, especially not after so many years. And you were leaving.
There was no point in getting attached when it would just hurt more when you had to say goodbye again.
No, you would stay home. On the floor of an empty house eating chinese food.
You’d also bought a bottle of wine and you left the food on the floor as you walked to your bag and rummaged through it to find the bottle.
You pulled it out proudly, almost as if it was a newborn child, and you didn’t bother looking for glasses. You knew there was none.
So you opened the bottle and took a long gulp of wine.
Tonight you would enjoy your own miserable company.

You woke to a loud pounding on the door and you groaned as the room focused in front of you.
It was dark and you rubbed your eyes.
After drinking the bottle of wine and finishing your chinese, at some point you had passed out on the floor of the living room.
The pounding continued and you stumbled to your feet.
“Im coming!” You yelled. What time was it? The sun wasn’t up so it must be late, you thought.
Eventually you made your way to the front door and you swung it open.
Jax stood in the door way, the dark night illuminated by the moon shining down behind him.
“Good morning.” He said with a coy smirk on his face, as he glanced over your rumpled skirt and messy hair.
“What the fuck Jax? What time is it?” You asked and stifled a yawn.
“3.15.” He answered.
You groaned and leant against the doorway and wrapped your arms around yourself.
“What are you doing here?” You asked.
Gradually you began to wake up more and you suddenly felt self conscious under his gaze.
You were still dressed in your business skirt and shirt and your hair was a mess.
“You didn’t come to the party.” Jax answered. He glanced behind you, into the empty  house and noticed the bottle of wine and the empty food carton on the floor.
“Yeah, sorry Jax. I got home late.” You explained.
He nodded.
“Wanna go for a ride?”
“Its three in the morning Jax.” You groaned.
Hr laughed loudly and looked at you through his eye lashes as he reached into his pocket and pulled out a cigarette.
“Never stopped you before,” He winked.
You sighed and stood straight.
“Let me get changed.” You said before shutting the door ad leaving him in the night as you walked to your bedroom.
What were you doing? You thought to yourself. You had not gone to that party to stay away from Jax. You didn’t want to complicate things. And here he was, on your doorstep in the middle of the night.
You pulled off your skirt and tugged on a pair of jeans before ripping iff your blouse and rummaging through your bags for a sweater.
Its just one ride. You told yourself, desperately trying to convince yourself that this wasn’t a bad idea.
Quickly you tugged on some socks and your boots before walking back to the front door.
You knelt by your bag and pulled out your keys before walking tot he front door, opening and closing it behind you.
The night was crisp and the faint smell of tobacco filled the air as Jax leant against his bike, puffing on  his cigarette.
The moonlight shone down on him and even in this light he was ridiculously handsome.
You locked the door and slid the keys into your pocket and as you approached him Jax tossed his cigarette to the ground.
He held out a helmet and you took it before tugging it down onto your head and buckling the strap.
You watched as he swung his leg over and sat on his bike before looking back at you, a mischievous spark in his eyes.
You couldn’t help the grin spreading over your face as you placed your hands on his shoulders and swung your leg over the bike and sinking down behind him.
You shifted your hands to bis waist and you clutched at the leather as he brought the bike to life, the loud roar ripping through the quiet night.
Jax turned back to you and you nodded, reassuring him.
Slowly you rolled out of your driveway and you wrapped your arms tighter around his waist and pressed your face against his back, leaning your body with his as he turned the corner.
Gradually his speed increased as you moved through your street and into the open roads and you let the scent of his leather fill your lungs.
The streets blurred past you as the bike roared through the night and you held on toJax tightly.
Maybe this wasn’t such a bad idea after all.

After an hour or so Jax pulled into a wooded area and rode slowly through the trees.
The track was familiar to you; it was where he used to bring you when you were young.
The area was surrounded by looming trees but it cleared out into a small opening and you had spent countless nights here, getting drunk with Opie and Jax, or simply lying on the ground and staring up at the stars.
The trees began to clear and Jax pulled the bike to a stop before killing the engine.
You swung your leg over first and lifted the helmet from your head before shaking your hair out and handing it back to Jax.
“This place hasn’t changed.” You said quietly. Your voice sounded delicate in the quiet of the night.
You couldn’t hear the roads from here, and the only sounds were the distant noises of animals and the light wind rustling through the leaves.
Jax followed you as you stepped over the grass and moved into the middle of the clearing, looking up through the opening in the trees and looking at the stars.
It was just as beautiful as you remembered.
You sat on the ground and Jax sat next to you.
Neither of you spoke for a while. You sat content in each others silent company.
“Why did you never come back?”
His words broke the silence and you struggled with your answer.
You glanced down at your hands in your lap and twiddled your thumbs.
“I couldnt.” Was all you said.
Jax nodded slowly and you sighed.
“It was too hard for me. After dad died I just couldn’t bare to bring myself back here.” You told him truthfully. “I was scared.”
You looked back up at the stars and admired their beauty.
“Did you want to? Come back?” Jax asked.
You turned to him and he met your gaze. Even in the dark light his blue eyes shone brightly and you smiled sadly.
“Everyday.” You whispered.
Jax studied you closely.
He reached his hand out and squeezed yours gently. The moment his hand touched yours you felt sparks shooting through your body.
His eyes locked on yours and he moved closer slightly. You weren’t sure if your heart had ever beat faster than it did in this moment.
As your heads slowly moved closer together you noticed everything about him. You noticed the slight speck of green in his blue eyes, barely big enough to notice. You noticed the small scar on his cheek and for a moment you wondered how he got it. You wanted to know everything about his life since you left,you wanted to know everything about this man that was right in front of you. But more than anything you wanted to feel his lips on yours.
Gradually his head moved closer to yours and you could feel the heat of his breath on your lips. You licked you lips nervously and glanced at his before looking back into his eyes.
Just as the loaning became almost unbearable Jax’s lips pressed against yours and the warmth of his mouth sent currents running through your body.
Your hands reached out and held either side of his face as his wrapped around your body and you whimpered slightly as his mouth moved in sync with yours.
Your lips moved in harmony with his and you ran your fingers through his thick hair, desperately clinging to him.
His mouth grew hungrier and he kissed you more fiercely now,exploring your mouth with his tongue. You could taste the cigarette and whiskey on his lips.
He gently pulled your body down till you were lying and he hovered his body over yours.
You opened your legs and Jax lay between them, his groin pressing against yours and you moaned softly at the weight of him on top of you.
Both of your breathing became more rapid as you made out on the grass like a couple of horny teenagers.
His fingers traced down your body and he gently slid them beneath your shirt and you whimpered softly as the coolness of his rings mixed with the warmth of your skin.
For a moment your lips parted and Jax smirked down at you before tracing his lips down your neck.
You arched your neck for him, allowing him to suck gently at your soft skin and you moaned once more.
His fingers traced further up your body and he cupped your breasts through the fabric of your bra.
You moaned and squirmed beneath him and Jax smirked as he lifted to his knees and tugged your shirt over your head.
Your hair splayed out around you messily and you looked at him through thick eye lashes.
A blush rose to your cheeks as he admired your body and gingerly you sat up and reached behind you to unclip your bra.
You met his gaze as you let the fabric fall from your skin and you tossed it onto the ground beside you before leaning back onto your eyebrows.
Jax licked his lips as his eyes explored your bare chest, and he was amazed that you could be covered in dirt and sweat and still smell and look like the best thing he’d ever seen, and he didn’t waste much time before leaning back over you.
He pressed a kiss to your lips once more before trailing them down your neck and across your chest.
Hr sucked gently as he moved, leaving a faint trail of bruises from your collarbone to your nipple.
You moaned as his tongue licked around your nipple and he sucked gently.
Jax growled at the sound of your whimpering beneath him and an urgency came over him.
His lips sucked rougher around your nipple now and his fingers fumbled with the button of your jeans.
Your fingers were in his hair, tugging at the strands gently.
Once he got your jeans unbuttoned he tugged them down your thighs quickly followed by your panties. He wasted no time in removing his own clothes and he hovered over you once more, his lips exploring your with an urgent hunger.
Your lips moved with his and you felt his fingers stroke through your wet folds and you opened your legs slightly wider, enjoying the feel of his hard cock on your inner thigh.
He works you with his fingers expertly, knowing just how to make you shudder and moan his name into the night.
He moves his fingers against you til your on the verge of your release when he stops and slides himself inside you, his hands moving to hold you by the hips gently.
He fills you slowly and you both moan as you stretch around him.
Slowly he rocks his hips against yours and it doesn’t take long til your begging for more.
His thrusts became rougher and harder and with each move he leaves you breathless.
The night is filled with the sound of your moans and his growls and his skin slapping against yours.
When you cum you scream his name as your walls clench around him and Jax growls as he finds his release, his hot seed filling you.
He slows his movements and gently slides out of you before collapsing to the ground beside you.
Both of you are panting heavily and he reaches for your hand, intertwining his fingers with yours as you both catch your breath and stare up at the stars.

You pressed your cheek to his leather as he rode through the night, your fingers clutching at the leather around his waist.
You couldn’t quite explain the mixture of emotions that ran through your body as you rode.
Making love with Jax had been everything and more than you could have ever imagined and you were still coming down from that high.
You had both laid beneath the stars for a while, lying naked on the grass.
Jax had helped you dress yourself and plucked leaves from your ruffled hair.
Neither of you had spoken much, but it wasn’t awkward or uncomfortable.
And as you drove closer back into town the reality of what had happened began to hit you in waves.
As the wind swept your hair out behind you a tear rolled down your cheek and you didn’t bother to wipe it away.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Are you sure about this, (y/n)?” Your real estate agent asked you.
You rolled your eyes and smiled at him from across the desk.
“For the millionth time, I’m sure.” You told him.
“We could get more for the property if you wait til the report comes back. It wont take more than a week.” He told you, a hint of concern in his voice.
“I know, Jeremy. But I need the house sold, like now.”
“Alright, whatever you say (y/n).” Jeremy said and shuffled the papers on the desk.
“I’ll get the ads up and the paperwork sent off right away.”
You smiled and stood, smoothing down your skirt.
“Thank you.”
Jeremy stood too and walked towards the door of his office before opening it for you.
You lifted your handbag off the chair next to you and swung it on to your shoulder.
“I’ll be round this afternoon to put the ‘For Sale’ signs up.” Jeremy told you.
You smiled and thanked him before walking past him and out of the office.
As you walked you felt your handbag vibrate and you sighed as you pulled out your cell phone.
He was trying to call you, again.
You hit ignore.
That makes it eight missed calls from him. Since you’d woken.
You’d lost count of the amount of times you’d hit ‘ignore’ to Jax’s calls in the last few days.
The last thing you needed was to hear his ‘we’re better off as friends’ speech.
So you saved him the bother and you’d been ignoring his calls ever since he’d left your house that night.
The next morning you’d woken and headed straight to the office,determined to get the house sold, and get the hell out of Charming.
You tossed your phone back into your bag and continued walking to your car.
You fumbled with the keys and eventually unlocked your door.
After sliding in and sticking the keys in the ignition you wound down the windows and turned the radio on, letting the music fill the air.
Your car pulled out of its park and you drove along the street before stopping at a red light.
Seconds past and thats when you heard it.
You could always hear them before you saw them and you gulped and gripped the wheel.
In a matter of seconds a dozen bikes sped past you and you recognised each member that passed.
None of them saw you, however and you were glad.
But that still didnt stop your heart almost beating out of your chest as Jax sped past you followed by his brothers.
Finally the light turned green and you drove on.
You needed to get out of this town, and quick.

The rest of the day passed quickly.
You had spent your time doing touch-ups on the property after you had bought some paint down town, and a camp chair too, so now at least you had something to sit on.
Paint splatters covers your grey tank and speckled your cheeks but you didn’t care. The only person you were seeing today was Jeremy, and he had just left after erecting the ‘For Sale’ sign on the front lawn.
You were lucky he put up with you, really. He had your best intentions at heart and wanted you to get the best price for your fathers property.
But money was the last of your concerns. You just wanted it sold.
So you had argued and argued and finally he had agreed to put the ads out at a generously reduced price.
The house was a steal.
It wasn’t in the greatest of conditions but for the price you were asking for, you knew the buyer wouldn’t care.
A bargain.
You heard a knock on the door faintly over the blasting noise of your music.
A frown came to your lips and you knelt, resting your pain brush on top of the bucket.
You hadn’t heard any bikes pull up yet you still didn’t feel completely relieved.
Its probably just Jeremy. You told yourself as you walked through the house.
You quickly turned the volume down on your portable speakers and walked to the door.
As you reached for the handle you wiped your hair out of your face and swung it open.
It wasn’t Jeremy.
It was Gemma fucking Teller.
She stood leaning against the wall, her oversized sunglasses framing her face.
You sighed when your saw her pursed lips and you crossed your arms over your chest.
“What do you want, Gemma?” You asked.
She would have to be deaf to not hear the attitude in your voice and she raised her eye brows at you.
She paused before speaking, taking in your messy bun and your paint splattered face and clothes.
“That how you answer the door to all your visitors?” She asked coolly.
“Only the ones I don’t wanna see on my doorstep.” You bit back.
You had no right to be so catty, really. Gemma had done nothing wrong, and neither had Jax. It was you that had cut all contact yet you still felt irritated having her turn up like this and you knew she was about to give you one of her famous lectures.
She smirked slightly at your words and lifted her sunglasses, letting them sit on her head.
“There a reason you’ve been avoiding phone calls?” She asked you, her dark eyes watching you closely.
“Been busy.” You shrugged.
Gemma sighed and stepped closer.
“Listen here, missy. I don’t know what happened between you and Jackson. But you have no right to turn up in this town after all these years and break his heart all over again.”
You glared at her but she didn’t budge.
“You owe him an explanation at least. Dint you dare leave town without telling him exactly why you came back just to rip his heart out.”
Her words cut through you like ice but you didn’t let her see it.
Instead you sighed and rolled your eyes.
“Get off my porch, Gemma.”
She looked you over once more before pushing off the wall and turning her back.
She took two steps before she stopped.
“He loves you. Remember that.” She said over her shoulder before walking down the steps towards her car.
You closed the door quickly and pressed your back against it, looking around the empty room.
Fucking Gemma Teller and her fucking lectures.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Two days had passed since Gemma had turned up at your front door, and it had been a week since that night with Jackson.
You sat alone in the diner, staring at the plate of food in front of you, poking it gingerly with your fork.
The phone calls had become less frequent but they hadn’t stopped, yet you still hadn’t found the courage to answer any of them. Not even Opies calls.
“Something wrong with the food, darlin?”
You glanced up and saw the waitress standing by the booth, a look of her concern on her face as she looked at the plate of food in front of you, untouched.
“Not at all. Just not as hungry as I thought.” You told her and smiled warmly.
She smiled back at you and left you to your own misery.
You sighed and left the fork on the table, resting your chin in your hand and your elbow on the table and you glanced into the street.
Even at night time Chamring still had a certain spark about it.
The streets, illuminated with street lights and neon signs in windows, the smell of fried food filling the streets.
Gemma was right, of course. You knew you couldn’t leave with out talking to him.
You didn’t even really know why you were ignoring him at all.
Someone had placed an offer on the house today and Jeremy had called you excitedly, knowing your be glad to hear of the progress. But you hadn’t been.
The offer was more than you were asking for yet you couldn’t bring yourself to go down to the office and sign off on the papers.
There was something you had to do first.
You sighed and slid out of the booth and after tossing a twenty dollar tip on the table you left the diner.
You had driven down but you didn’t head to your car.
It was only a short walk to TM,and you could use the time to figure out exactly what you were going to say.

The walk had been a good idea, giving you a chance to clear your mind and as you walked into the TM lot a wave of confidence washed over you.
You saw the row of bikes lined up and the light filling the lot from the open doors of the garage.
Music pumped through the walls of the clubhouse,but it wasn’t loud enough to signify a SAMCRO party, which you were relieved about.
As you walked silently into the lot you could hear the faint banter and smell of weed and almost instantly the nerves returned.
No one had seen you yet, and you knew it wasn’t to late to turn around.
But you couldn’t bring yourself to stop your feet from moving and gradually you turned the corner to the picnic table.
Jax sat with his back facing you, but you could recognise his blond hair anywhere.
Opie sat beside him and opposite them sat Juice and Tig.
All of them talking amongst themselves, puffing on cigarettes and joints and sipping on beers ad whiskey.
You fumbled with your fingers.
Juice spotted you out of the corner of his eye and he turned to you, smiling warmly.
Eventually they all saw Juice looking at something and all of them turned.
You felt so small, so fragile when those blue eyes fell on you and for a moment you forgot you weren’t alone.
Silence fell and Jax closed his mouth tightly.
The rest of the men stood and Juice and Tig headed inside, nodding to Jax.
Opie walked to you and kissed your cheek before heading inside, leaving you alone with Jax.
He turned his back to you and took a long swig of his beer.
You forced your feet to move and you slowly walked towards the table before sliding onto the bench opposite him.
Jax took a long drag of his cigarette, and you watched him blow it out.
He still didn’t look at you or say anything and you twiddled your thumbs in your lap.
“How are you?” You asked quietly.
Almost instantly you regretted saying anything at all.
Jax glanced at you with a raised brow.
“How am I?” He repeated.
You blushed and gulped, unsure of how to respond.
Jax scoffed and rubbed his hand across his face.
“Jesus Christ, (y/n). What are you doing here?” He asked you. There was a coldness to his tone and you shuddered slightly.
“I.. I thought we should talk.” You said quietly.
“Now you wanna talk? I tried calling you. A million fucking times. But now you wanna talk?” Jax snarled now and you could definitely sense the anger radiating off him.
You stood and dropped your hands.
“This was a mistake.” You said.
“Typical. You cant keep running forever, (y/n).” Jax said.
You had only taken a few steps when he spoke and you stopped.
“I shouldn’t have come back.” You said and Jax spun in his seat.
His nostrils were flared and you knew he was angry.
“So why did you?” He asked and he stood.
“You know why.” You told him and you felt tears rising behind your eyes.
“No. I don’t know. You could have sold the house from the city. We both know that. So why’d you come back? Why now?” He stepped closer to you, narrowing the gap between you and you stepped back.
You didn’t know how to answer him.
“It doesn’t matter why, Jax. The house sold. Im leaving again, so you can just pretend this never happened.” It wasn’t exactly a lie. You had an offer on the house, all you had to do was sign it over.
Jax scoffed and shook his head before looking at you once more.
His blue eyes were filled with fire and you shuddered under his gaze.
“So thats it, huh? Your just gonna forget about me and you?!” Jax snarled, his voice rising.
You stepped back once more and your back hit the wall.
“I could never forget about you, Jackson.” You spat back.
He smirked evilly and moved closer, placing his hands on the wall either side of your head.
“So what, you just wanna fuck me and leave, huh?”
You gulped and glared at him.
“Atleast you got what you wanted.” Jax snarled and turned, walking away from you.
You clenched your fists.
“Fuck you!” You screamed. God, it made you angry that he was right. You had treated him like shit all these years, and especially this week.
Jax shook his head and continued walking.
“You wanna know why it took me so long to comeback?” You yelled.
Finally he turned back to face you and you stepped closer to him, your body shaking with emotion.
“Because I fucking love you, you idiot!” You yelled. “I was so fucking terrified that if I came back you would have moved on, that you’d have an old lady. And i knew I wouldn’t be able to handle that. And yeah, maybe I shouldn’t have fucked you the other night. But i thought id do you the favour of ending things with me. We both know I cant stay here!”
Jax stared at you, his mouth slightly open.
You breathed heavily, and you had never felt more vulnerable that you did right in that moment.
“What did you say?” Jax asked slowly.
You scoffed ad turned around.
“Forget it Jax. I’ll be out of town by the end of the week.”
Your footsteps were rapid as you walked away from him and you didn’t hear him call after you.
Suddenly though, you heard heavy footsteps behind you and before you could react he grabbed your wrist and spun your body to face him.
His hand gripped your face and he crashed his lips against yours.
For a moment you let him in, let him kiss you so desperately.
But you quickly came to your senses and you shoved him away from you with all your force.
“I love you.” He said quietly.
You froze, only your eyes moving to meet his.
“What?” You whispered.
“God, (y/n), I love you. I have since you left.” Jax said.
A tear escaped your eye and you let it roll gently down your cheek.
“It broke my heart when you left. And Ive been with other women, lots of them. But every women I have ever been with, I have seen you. Its always been you.”
His words echoed in your ears and you stared at him as tears rolled down your cheeks.
You stepped closer to him and he reached his hand out, letting his finger gently wipe away the tears.
“I cant lose you again.” Jax whispered.
His blue eyes glistened with his own tears and you gulped before you stepped closer and reached up to kiss his lips.
“The house didn’t sell. I only got an offer.” You told him truthfully.
Jax grinned and shook his head slightly. He reached his hand out and swept your hair behind your ear before holding your face gently, his thumb stroking your cheek.
“Dont sell it.” He told you. “Stay here, in Charming.”
“Ive got a job Jax, and an apartment-“
“So quit. We’ll find you work here. Please, (y/n), I cant lose you again.”
You looked into his eyes and saw the hurt you had caused him all these years, the begging.
Slowly, you nodded.
“Okay.”
Jax grinned and pressed his lips against yours.
“I love you, (y/n).  I really love you.”
You grinned back at your best friend, the love of your life.
“I love you too, Jax.”


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Sorry if theres any grammar or spelling mistakes, i can never be bothered editing and my phone loves to auto correct so if it doesn’t make sense i apologise.

Hope you liked this!

justanotherhamiltrash  asked:

Hi there, do you have any recs for long drarry fics? I'm not very good at finding them

Hello!! I’ve done a rec list for long, slow burn fics in the past, so please check that out because I love every fic on that list to death! But OH MAN I could talk about long Drarry fics for the rest of my life, so here are some more! All very long, but not necessarily slow burn this time ;)

What We Pretend We Can’t See by gyzym (131K)- Seven years out from the war, Harry learns the hard truth of old history: it’s never quite as far behind you as you thought.
This is the only one I am going to copy from the slow burn rec list, because I just want to rec it every day of my life. It is quite literally my number one favorite fic ever, and I am not exaggerating. Do you see how serious I am right now? I am never serious. This fic is so amazing it turned me serious. I’m not even going to summarize it again because if you trust me at all you will just go read it nooooooow.

Turn by Saras_Girl (307K)- One good turn always deserves another. Apparently. 
Of course in the middle of declaring my favorite fic ever, I had to remember Turn and how utterly brilliant it is and how I’ve reread it and it was STILL utterly brilliant the second time and have a crisis because MAYBE THIS IS ACTUALLY MY FAVORITE FIC???! Aaah help, I can never choose! Anyway, are you a drarry fan who hasn’t read Turn yet? Really? Well, in that case FUCK YOU BECAUSE I AM SO JEALOUS YOU GET TO READ IT FOR THE FIRST TIME YOU LUCKY BASTARD. *ahem* Anyway, in this amazing fic, epilogue-compliant and worn-down Harry goes to an alternate dimension in which he is happily married to Draco, owns the best pet snake ever, and makes furniture for a living (love artsy Harry <3). It’s truly a masterpiece, and as always with my recs there is a happy ending, so don’t worry!

Tales from the Special Branch Series by femmequixotic (272K so far)- (Summary is from the second part of the series, which is the first long installment: Lost in Your ArmsThree months after their brief encounter, Draco has almost forgotten about Potter–or so he tells himself. Then a Dark wizard shows up on the Auror radar and all hell breaks loose. Draco will have to choose between everything he holds dear–everything he’s worked so hard for–and a few stolen moments of passion with a certain green-eyed Inspector, once his sworn enemy and now something rather different entirely. He’ll make the right choice, won’t he? Who is he kidding? He’ll ruin everything, as per usual. Bad choices and the name Malfoy go hand in hand.
This series is a WIP, but a regularly updated one and the FIRST CHAPTER OF THE NEXT BOOK IS BEING RELEASED TOMORROW AND I AM SO EXCITED!!! I feel so lucky to be following along with it as it comes out, because let me tell you, this is an instant classic! There is lovely forbidden fornication between a boss (Harry) and his subordinate (Draco) (the prequel was written for the kink fest so you can bet the sex is SCORCHING), a very compelling mystery/case, and truly brilliant characterization! I identify so much with this Draco. And I also love that Harry isn’t the perfect flawless cinnamon roll he is often portrayed as in fics. Everyone in this series is very human, and I am just dying of excitement to find out what happens to them next! I know I’ve already gushed about this fic in several other places recently, and I’m sorry to repeat myself but I really can’t get enough! PLEASE JOIN ME IN ROOTING FOR @femmequixotic AS SHE KINDLY DEDICATES HER SOUL TO US ALL FOR THE NEXT BIT OF HER LIFE <3

Secrets by Vorabiza (395K)- Beginning with Draco’s unexpected arrival at the Dursleys, Harry’s summer after sixth year becomes filled with activity and many secrets. As his summer progresses, Harry generates several unexpected allies as he finds himself actively becoming the leader of the Light side. 
OMG it’s the first fic I ever read!! The fic that brought me into the fandom! I have suuuuuch a soft spot for this fic, and it is just so so so good! It’s probably my favorite adventure/wizarding war plot of all. Harry is just so confident and he embraces his Slytherin side and really Gets Shit Done, and it’s SO SATISFYING. Also, I love any fic in which Draco helps with the Horcrux hunt. Also there’s a baaaaaaby (no mpreg) and mentor!Snape, which is really nice. This fic was written post-HBP, but is SURPRISINGLY accurate in its predictions. Oh, and the sex is super hot too ;)

Checkmate by Naadi (245K)- Draco has the perfect plan to get Harry Potter and challenges him to a game of Dare Chess. But is it love, or betrayal, he has in mind? A real chess game is played throughout the story.
This fic is so lovely! It’s an “alternate 7th year AU”, written after Goblet of Fire. It’s fluffy and funny and lovey and then dramatic and passionate and YEAH I LOVED IT. The real time game of chess, in which Harry and Draco take turns making “moves” (on each other) is just such a wonderful idea. Read the author’s note for more info! 

Leo Inter Serpentes by Aeternum (658K combined so far)- Just one conversation between two eleven year old boys goes slightly differently, and the world changes. Just how much will be different with Harry being sorted into Slytherin, and how much will stay the same?
SLYTHERIN HARRY ALERT SLYTHERIN HARRY ALERT! Yep, a Slytherin Harry rewrite, and a REALLY GOOD ONE. Like usually I love the idea of Slytherin Harry, and then once I start reading I either find I’m bored because everything is just a repeat of canon or I can’t get into it because everyone is so OOC. But not this one! This fic is engaging and different enough from canon to be interesting and I love the eleven-year-old baby drarry friendship that eventually turns to romance! This fic also features benevolent mentor!Snape, which I suppose is either an enticement or a warning depending on your preferences. You SHOULD be warned that it’s a WIP. But the author is currently actively posting the 6th book, and I have hope it won’t be abandoned :)

Any Instrument by dicta_contrion (131K)- Draco Malfoy wouldn’t go back to England for anything less than an exceptional case. Being asked to figure out why Harry Potter can’t control his magic might be exceptional enough to qualify.
Okay I have a HUGE thing for healer!draco and this fic portrayed him so so so perfectly. Harry is having complications with his magic after an operation gone wrong. So Draco comes from France and of course they can’t get together because Draco is Harry’s healer but OMG THE UST and then let me just say that when they finally do have sex, it’s the most beautiful, moving, heart-stopping sex scene you will ever read. Like, I felt it in my soul. And the character development is so compelling and there are literally no flaws in this fic whatsoever.

Starts With a Spin by Maxine (120K)- It started with the spin of a bottle, and now Harry and Draco have gotten themselves so far into their own game there’s almost no way out again. Except to keep playing.
AAAAH this fic has all the teenage drarry feels! They’re so in character, always trying to one-up each other! And like these constant party games are happening and they’re being “forced” to go further and further with each other by their friends until they’re actually having sex, and YET THEN THE WAR IS STILL ON AS WELL, and it’s just super well-written and great! Another classic :D

Changing of the Guard by Lomonaaeren (210K)- Need a perfect stranger? Ask Metamorphosis. Harry Potter runs the business secretly and becomes whoever’s needed for each occasion. He’s not sure whether he should be more surprised, worried, or amused when Draco Malfoy comes to Metamorphosis and requests an actor who can play his boyfriend so that his parents will disown him. Yet Harry has even more dangerous choices after he creates Brian, Draco’s “perfect” boyfriend. Draco doesn’t know who Brian is, but he’s trying to find out—and now so is Harry.
Aaah Lomonaaeren! Drarry writer of my dark, dark heart! And yet I know some people aren’t huge fans of her style and I don’t want to be reccing her fics all the time, so I try to keep the Lomon recs relatively infrequent. But if you are looking for long fics and you do like her style, I’m pretty sure she can keep you busy for like an entire year. This woman is more prolific than Steven King, and it’s a true blessing. As for this particular fic, Harry basically has Dissociative Identity Disorder, but he has been making the most of it by running a whoever-you-need-for-hire business. Only then Draco arrives, and Harry’s world had to come crashing down at some point and that point is NOW, and the drama is just so so good and this fic gave me ALL THE FEELS. It’s possibly my favorite of her fics :)

Don’t Let Me Go

Request: Fic Req: Peter Parker coming over in the middle of the night because he had a nightmare.  + based on that pic of tom shirtless scrolling through his phone with a cup of tea/coffee bc I’m thirsty

Pairing: Peter Parker + Reader

Warnings: A few curse words I think if you consider that a warning lol A LOT OF FLUFF SURPRISNGLY


You had only been asleep for maybe an hour when you heard the incessant knocking on your window. You were in your apartment alone since your parents had decided to take a trip together alone for the anniversary, so you were on higher alert and the fact that someone was knocking at your door at two in the morning didn’t sit right with you.

You sat up in your bed, hesitantly grabbing the first object within reach which just so happened to be an umbrella littered with various cats and dogs – a joke gift Peter had given you on your third-year friendship anniversary because, “Get it?! It’s raining cats and dogs!”

At the thought of Peter you smiled slightly, but the continuous knocking snapped you out of your thoughts. You lowered your umbrella as you walked closer to your window, the thought that it might be more likely that Peter be at your window than a murderer. You were proven right as you drew your curtain back and saw a flushed Peter sitting on your fire escape, clad in his alter-ego’s costume minus the mask.

You pushed your window up, immediately being pushed back into your bedroom as Peter’s arms wounded around your waist and pulled you against him. You were stunned for a couple of seconds, hearing his harsh and broken breathing. You eventually returned his embrace, your arms finding themselves around his neck.

“Peter?”

“God, you’re so warm. No!” He gripped you tighter, stopping your movements of trying to let go. “Please, don’t let go of me.”

Your grip tightened around him as he lifted you off the floor slightly. “Peter,” your grip loosened as you felt yourself on the ground again, “I have to close the window. Go lay in my bed, I’ll be quick.” He reluctantly let go, shuffling to get to your bed. As promised, as soon as you shut your window you returned to his open embrace under your comforter.

“Do you want to know why I’m here at two in the morning?” In all honesty, you weren’t going to ask. You didn’t mind losing sleep over Peter, especially when he seemed like he needed you. You were just going to fall asleep against him, like you had done so many times before. You’d do anything just to be like this with him every night.

“Only if you want to tell me.”

“I had another nightmare.”

“About?” You knew what the answer was. Ever since Peter had told you about him being Spider-Man, his nightmares about you being taken from him were almost a weekly thing. It had never gotten bad enough for him to visit you in the middle of the night, however.

“You… except it was different. God, it felt so real.” His voice started to tremble as his arms tightened around your waist. “You wouldn’t wake up – no matter what I said or did, you just didn’t respond to me. Then your body was ripped away from me, I couldn’t say bye and I didn’t know where you were. I saw flashes of green and orange, but nothing else. Everything was dark, cold – everything I imagine life without you to be.”

His head had drifted down to rest on your chest, his grip on you deadly but you didn’t mind. You knew what it felt like to dream of a world without Peter. You would never tell him but knowing how often he risked his life scared the absolute shit out of you. You knew it was something he felt he needed to do, an obligation of some sorts, and you knew he was more than capable, but nothing would ever make you comfortable with the idea of him not ever coming back to you. Even when he promised you each time he would always come back to you. “(Y/N)?”

“Yes, Peter?”

“Don’t let me go.” His speech was slurred, dripping with exhaustion as you felt every one of his muscles relax, his eyes fluttering to a close.

“Never, Peter.”

“Good,” his grip loosened, “I love you.” You tensed at the words, Peter already having slipped into unconsciousness. Peter and you had been best friends for four years, he still flushed whenever your hands so much as skimmed each other’s while you walked down the sidewalk together. Your fingers lightly continued to card through his hair as you fell asleep with a smile on your face.


You woke up to the sun peeping through your thin blue curtains, the New York cold becoming evident with the lack of the additional body heat next to you. “Peter?” You heard a soft “in the kitchen!” before you flung your legs off the side of your bed and padded your way to the bathroom to freshen up before making your way to the kitchen.

Your knees almost buckled at the sight in front of you. Peter stood at the kitchen entrance without his shirt, his hair a complete mess as he idly looked through his phone, occasionally bringing a cup of coffee to his lips. You shook your head at the sinful thoughts that overwhelmed you and started walking up to him. You had gone unnoticed until you walked up behind him, wrapping your arms around his waist. You laughed lightly as you felt his body tense and then relax under your touch. “It was cold without this morning.” He turned in your arms and wrapped an arm around your shoulders.

“Sorry,” he laughed in return, “I had to use the bathroom, and then I decided to make some coffee. Want?” You shook your head no, burying your face further into his bare chest. Peter set his cup down on the counter next to you and wrapped both of his arms around you, pulling you impossibly closer to him. “Want to head back to bed?” At your nod, he began to walk you backwards to the direction of your room. His hands dropped to your waist, helping you lay backwards on your bed, crawling on top of you as his hands supported his weight above you.

His head rested in the nape of your neck, his breath hot against your skin. You smiled softly as you felt his lips peck you a few times, feather like kisses trailing from you neck to your jawline, only to rest on your cheek. The moment felt so intimate, it made you dizzy – the feeling almost making you forget Peter’s confession to you last night.

Almost.

“Peter?” You didn’t allow your voice to come out as more than a whisper, scared that you’d make him nervous with any other tone.

“Yes?” His breath fanned across your face, making your cheeks burn just the slightest.

“I love you, too,” you prepared for him to pull away from you, for him to at least tense above you, or for him to laugh, even… but, he didn’t. You felt the ghost of a smile against your cheek before you felt his lips against your skin again. He dragged his lips from your cheek to the corner of your mouth, pecking you there in the softest of ways. You breathing hitched as his face pulled away to look at yours, his eyes trailing along every detail of your face.

“Say it again,” he closed his eyes before taking a deep breath in, out, “please.”

You smiled, bringing your hands to rest on either side of his face, pulling him closer to you. “I love you.”

As soon as the words left you, it was almost as if he wanted to inhale them, wanting to hear you say you love him in every inch of his body. His lips landed on yours in a rushed kiss, filled with heavy breathing and soft sighs and wide smiles, almost making it impossible to kiss through it.

“I love you,” his kiss traveled across your face, earning small laughs from you, “so much.”

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anonymous asked:

please DO elaborate...... 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻

From my tododeku hc post:

they’re soft and sweet in their first year, ridiculously hot and heavy in their second, and by third year, they are down right steady and known across UA as being “the strongest powercouple of the generation” (it is kind of embarrassing when people say that but they secretly love it)

Ok, so what I mean by all this is as follows:

First year: In my mind, they wouldn’t start actually dating till their first year is nearly over but ANYWAYS, when they do start dating, it’s really little things like ice cream dates after school. It’s hooking pinkys underneath the lunch table when they sit next to each other and blushing about it. It’s soft hand kisses when they part ways after school to walk home. It’s coming home with the dreamy-ist smiles on their faces. It’s the way todoroki blushes slightly and smiling softly when he talks to Momo about how his date with Deku was. It’s the way Deku’s face lights up when he talks about Todoroki to Iida and Uraraka. It’s holding hands when they think nobody can see. It’s when one catches the other staring at them from across the classroom and they both blush like crazy, Deku hiding his face in his hands. You know, pure and wholesome shit like that

Second year: At this point, they are way comfortable in their relationship and it’s less fluttery nerves and more hormone driven want. I’m basically working off the “horny high school boys” trope bc im so weak for that but you know how it goes. It just starts with them being more open about the fact that their dating and so they’re less nervous about PDA. They hold hands A LOT. They’ll hang off of each other (cue the “Todoroki holding deku by the hips” headcanon). One day in homeroom, they not-so-subtly end up sitting next to each  other even though they know they have assigned seats. Aizawa comes in and looks over the class like he does and he doesn’t say anything but he’s rolling his eyes. So, as you can imagine, this all develops into them being way more touchy than last year. Everyone can tell. Deku brings Todoroki home to meet his mom and have dinner (Deku’s mom is thrilled her son is so happy but that’s all matters for a different post).

 Their kisses evolve to the point where they’re getting at some deeper feeling than before and all they want to do is explore that feeling. Because it feels damn good. So before you know it, they’re stumbling into homeroom a few minutes late with ruffled hair and red faces bc yeah maybe they were making out behind a building and lost track of time, ok? They do stop being late for class but there’s rarely a moment after class that their hands aren’t all over each other.

There’s also the matter of the rival tension that’s inevitably between them. At first Deku is terrified that it’ll wreck their relationship but it sort of does the opposite… they figure out that it’s kind of a turn on…. Cue the sports festival and an avalanche of sexual tension. The entirety of both classes A and B end up having to oggle at it for the whole event because it’s very rare that they are put on the same teams. At nearly every break between events and such, Todoroki has Deku up against a wall kissing him crazy, the adrenaline of the games mixing with the hormonal haze that drives them together like magnets. He does have to let Deku be though as the one on one fights start because he knows how much Deku likes to take analysis notes. Without speculating on year 2 sports festival results, I think I’ll leave this here ^^ 

So, the year rolls on. There’s probably a class trip that’s at least semi-relaxing, maybe?? things get steamy ofc wtf else are class tips for.

 Terushima and other classmates start prying with little shame, asking if they’ve done it yet, had sex. Deku is slightly scandalized. Todoroki just rolls his eyes. Neither of them say so, but yes they have done the deed but just once, at Todoroki’s house one weekend when no one was home. They were under the guise of a train/study weekend, which wasn’t a lie… they just happened to also have sex as well…

so yeah, you get the gist of 2nd year ;)

Third year: By now, most of UA knows they’re boyfriends. At the very least they know that if you get pitted against either one of them for whatever reason, You’re probably fucked and if you were to go against them as a pair, well, you’re really fucked. They’re dead serious about their hero careers. They’re also dead serious about each other. Freshman and their own classmates alike look up to them as #relationshipgoals

They are way less distracted by each other than the previous year, buckling down on studying and training and more studying. They’re still stupidly in love, obviously but it isn’t all shiny, new urges so it’s less “oh my god what is this feeling?? i want more of it right now” and more “God, I can’t wait till this training exercise is over so I can flirt with my boyfriend”

Oh also, they LIVE for bragging about each other, ok. Even to people they already know like, I can imagine Deku getting first place in the sports festival that year and Todoroki doesn’t shut up about it for weeks. Class A turns into that meme of “I love–” “Yes, we know, you love Deku. You are in love with Izuku Midoriya who won the third year Sports Festival competition. you love him, Deku, the next symbol of peace among humanity, we get it…” and it’s beautiful. Deku is the exact same way, btw. Basically I see them walking though halls, holding hands and standing tall and everyone’s heads turn to watch them as they go by :’)

This post is almost 1k words so if you read all of it, i love u. let me know what u think