and i just... i'm so happy

im startin to get Depressed™ bc i’ve been so lonely my entire life n i just want a cute gf to have movie nights with, just once (1ce) in my life but apparently that’s too much to ask when u’re a lesbian in this society

originally I was going to make a super long post about my thoughts and stuff on gender I’ve been thinking about lately in regards to myself and how, for the past 2 years, I’ve been feeling super detached from my AAB gender, but

I think what I wrote on my other twitter account sums it up perfectly;; 

gender is fucky, but fluid, and i think lately i’ve been finding it easier to feel more comfortable realizing that i’m not 100% a girl and that’s okay. I’m still who I am. 

A lot of my major conflicts had to do with my culture and religion, but I realized that it doesn’t matter who I am, I can still practice my religion the way I already am. Who I am has nothing to do with how I present myself and that, in turn, has nothing to do with how I have to act. And the fact that I cover up and wear hijab from time-to-time also has nothing to do with being strictly female. 

There are still aspects I whole heartedly identify with in terms of my AAB gender (especially since I have strong feelings about being a wlw), but nevertheless, finding and realizing that there’s something out there that explains my feelings perfectly of not feeling 100% like a girl is such a relief to me

It’s been a long journey of nearly two years and I think I’m finally feeling comfortable with myself. Of course I still don’t mind if people still use she/her in regards to me, but yeah;;

  • Me: I'm really low maintenance :)
  • Also me: requires near constant attention and reassurance that my significant other doesn't hate me, gets extremely sad and angry when given any tiny reason to believe that they might not like me and then proceeds to hate them from any time between several hours to several days, is very emotionally dependent on them, is always sad or scared about something and needs to be comforted, gets jealous whenever they talk to anyone that isn't me, and is just generally high maintenance as hell
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I have been blessed by a whole new level of cuteness overload

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did somebody say wedding day destiel?

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Jongin for Esquire Korea 2017 Feb issue