and i have had so many!! things to do

anonymous asked:

Hi there! I've been reading some of the works you all have made and I love them! I was wondering if you could do #4 and #19 with jungkook, please?

Adore You (Jungkook x Reader Fluff)

Prompt request: “I thought you didn’t want me.” + “Are you jealous?”

Summary: There are so many things you adore about Jungkook. But if there’s one thing you don’t like, it’s how kind he is to everyone else. Can’t you just keep him for yourself?

Word count: 1.2k words

Originally posted by mayfifolle

You glanced at your seatmate from the corner of your eye. Jungkook had been sitting at your two-person desk since the beginning of the semester, and since then, you had begun to develop a crush. A pretty big crush, if you were being honest.

How could you not? Jungkook was kind, hardworking, and also incredibly good looking. You definitely weren’t alone in your infatuation, either. Almost every girl in your class eyed you enviously every day.

You slipped into your seat just as the bell rang. Jungkook was already there, and he glanced up at you as you arrived.

“Hey Y/N,” he greeted casually.

“Hey,” you smiled back, trying to stay nonchalant. 

“Did you do the homework last night?” Jungkook asked, flipping through his binder. He was studious–far more than you, anyway.

“Nope,” you replied easily. Chemistry was the least of your priorities. “I had a late shift last night.”

“Oh, you want to copy?” Jungkook offered, pushing his binder towards you. “You’re still working? Aren’t you worried about your grades this year?”

“Thanks,” you said, pulling out your own notebook. “And not really. My grades are good enough for university.”

“Damn,” Jungkook commented with a smile, although you missed it because you were too focused on writing. “Impressive. Also, I didn’t get some of the questions. Sorry about that.”

“Wow, that’s new,” you smirked. “You’re a thousand times better at chem than me, though.”

The teacher arrived, clearing his throat as he set his supplies down at the front of the class. You and Jungkook lapsed into silence as the lesson began. During the course of the period, you nodded off numerous times. Jungkook nudged you awake every time.

“Just let me sleep,” you whined, keeping your volume low so you wouldn’t get in trouble. “This is so boring and I’m exhausted.”

“You should reconsider that job of yours,” Jungkook suggested haughtily, and you just laughed.

The girl sitting in front of you turned around and glared at you. At first, you thought she was angry at you for talking, but when her gaze slipped to Jungkook’s longingly, you realized she was just jealous.

She turned around quickly, and you figured she wouldn’t bother you.

But boy, were you wrong.

The next day in class, you arrived (nearly late, as always) to see someone sitting in your seat beside Jungkook. It was the jealous girl from yesterday. You walked up to your seat, eyebrow raised.

“Oh, Y/N,” Jungkook noticed, looking up from his binder, which was placed in the middle of the shared desk. “I’m just explaining something to Ara.”

“I can move if you want,” Ara offered sweetly, though her eyes were daring you to suggest otherwise.

“No, it’s fine,” you replied, a little amusedly. What else could you say? You slipped into the empty seat in front of your desk and retrieved your supplies from your bag.

Jungkook and Ara talked ceaselessly behind you. You heard her giggle, and it made you want to gag. But Jungkook replied enthusiastically, and you wondered if Jungkook enjoyed your company at all. Pushing your insecurities away, you focused your attention to the front of the room.

Of all days, your teacher was absent. A timid-looking substitute scurried into the classroom, stammering out some instructions. The volume of the class increased, and Jungkook and Ara laughed away.

Annoyed, you turned to your own work. The student sitting beside you was a quiet, nerdy boy. You figured he wouldn’t want to converse with you. Pulling out your phone, you put on earphones and blasted your music, trying to drown out Ara’s voice.

“Uh, excuse me,” the boy beside you said hesitantly. You turned to him, pulling out an earbud. “Your music is really loud. Can you turn it down a little?”

Your eye twitched in annoyance. Like the class wasn’t loud already. “Sure,” you replied through gritted teeth. Opting to turn your music off completely, you resorted to placing your head on the desk.

It was another long shift yesterday, too, so it didn’t take long for you to fall asleep. Still, the background noise of Jungkook and Ara never ceased and haunted you in your slumber.


The next day, Ara was sitting in your seat again. She and Jungkook were looking at something on her phone, laughing, and didn’t notice your arrival. More defeated than anything, you slumped into Ara’s empty seat without comment.

At the sound of your chair scraping against the ground, Jungkook’s head shot up. He opened his mouth, but you weren’t looking his way, so he said nothing. Instead, he continued to entertain Ara, too polite to do anything else.

You wished he would say something like, “This isn’t your seat” or “I want Y/N to sit here,” but you knew he wouldn’t. Maybe he didn’t care if you sat with him, anyway. Jungkook was nice to everyone, and you were probably just projecting your own affections onto him.

The teacher strode into the classroom just as the bell rang.

“I apologize for my absence yesterday,” he began sternly, as always. “We’ll be starting a lab today. You’ll have to work quickly today to make up for lost time. So before I explain this assignment, please get into pairs.”

Inwardly, you cursed Ara for stealing your opportunity to work with Jungkook. Sighing, you turned to the boy beside you to ask if he wanted to be partners. But just as you opened your mouth, a hand shot out and tapped the boy on the back.

“Hey,” Jungkook said once the boy turned in his seat. “Do you mind if we switch spots?”

Your eyes widened to surprise, flicking to Jungkook. He was looking intently at the nerdy boy, who stammered his agreement. Glancing at Ara, you couldn’t help but smirk triumphantly. On your desk, Ara’s fists were clenched.

Jungkook swiftly switched seats with the boy beside you.

“I was thinking we could be partners,” Jungkook said as he set his books down. “You look a little surprised, so I hope that’s okay with you.”

“No, of course it’s fine,” you hurried to respond. “I just thought you didn’t want me. As your lab partner, I mean.”

“Are you jealous?” Jungkook asked, his eyebrows rising. Your cheeks burned, and you hurried to deny that. “She kinda just sat there. I didn’t want to be mean and tell her to move.”

“How was I supposed to know?” you sulked, burying your nose in your textbook. Still, you were giddy at the fact that Jungkook had went out of his way to be your partner.

“Obviously I’d rather sit with you,” Jungkook replied, a little incredulously. “Don’t be dumb. You wanted to sit with me too, right?”

“Yeah,” you mumbled sheepishly, still blushing. Jungkook smiled at you fondly, but like always, you were too busy looking elsewhere to notice.

The teacher’s voice cut through the noise, and he continued with his instructions. You and Jungkook turned your attention to the front of the class, and your embarrassment lessened once Jungkook’s gaze was diverted.

There were many things you adored about Jungkook. But if there was one thing you didn’t like, it was how kind he was to everyone. Still, he made up for it by being nicest to you. 

- Girl in Luv

Ok…these prompts were practically begging for Fuckboy!Jungkook, but I’ve written that so much and HE IS A SOFT BUN I can’t keep doing this! For real though, sometimes I think JK would be a real fuccboi if he grew up in North America. Like u seen the boy?? Still, he’s so cute, and I like writing sweet JK. You guys prefer fuckboy JK or smol bun JK?

anonymous asked:

I love how many times when you go back even to S1 that Daryl just watches Carol! There are so many beautiful moments where he is just adoring her from afar. And I love how he is always checking where she is when they are together or in danger, Consumed had so many of these! His face is so different when he is with or near her..just perfection. I adore the side look by the lake in S2 as she's looking at the cherokee rose. Do you have any particular favourite Daryl 'love stares'?

Your talking about this one right? 

Daryl has made a career of starting at Carol like this and there are sooo many moments I could think of when it comes to the ‘love’ stares. It really is hard to  narrow it down, because I saw someone on youtube say once say ‘there’s just something about the way he looks at her..’ *sighs*

There’s a pure, unconditional and sometimes desperate way he looks at her when she’s not looking at him and its so beautiful to me.

If i had to narrow it down and find a couple of looks that I love I would have choose these two..

Season 2 (along with the above one)

At the funeral, when he seems like he wants to apologize for being an ass but dosen’t know how to go about it or even start. She dosen’t even know he’s looking at her like this but you gotta wonder if she can’t feel it just a little bit. That ‘desperatly wanting to reach out’ look he has here.

And this on from Consumed (which could’ve been subtitled ‘heart-eyed Daryl for the amount of times he started at her) in which tells him he hasn’t asked her about the girls.

Like he knows somethings is hurting her and it hurts him but he won’t ask. He’ll just stare at her without her even knowing he’s doing it. Without her seeing just how much he loves her and wants her to share but only at the right time.

There is a beautiful honesty in the way he looks at her when she’s not looking at him. Like he knows what he wants to say until she looks at him and he chokes up just a bit. I think it might be the same reason why he dosen’t say her name when he talks to her. He’ll betray himself in a way.

So yeah… every time he looks at her like that I die… just saying.

anonymous asked:

it is just not fair.. if we're not getting any beautiful yousana scene if he's with noora it's not fair at all. I mean, in previuos seasons ALL of the principal had really romantic and memorable scenes. Do you think yousana is going to happen? I'm not talking bout sex scenes of course

i wholeheartedly believe in yousana. (but if noora’s ‘thing’ is yousef then i’m very critical). also, the main + love interest usually have the most memorable and romantic scenes after the hiatus, not before

also a lot of people have said yousana isn’t going to happen, namely bc there haven’t been that many scenes with them. so let’s look back at s3 and look at the main and their love interest and compare in these two seasons

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

hey.. it's ok if you keep restarting things! sometimes it's hard to find what you like. trust me, i've had like a million saves on tumblr. but one piece of advice i have is that to find a save you really really enjoy, and perhaps just play that save only. when you have too many, i think it can be kind of difficult to fully pursue each one. that's just my opinion and what works for me, though: do whatever makes you happy! ♥

Thank you so much for this nonny <333 That means so much and I’m so grateful to have your support!!

I’ve had so many headcanon and thoughts about bunker things during the six year jump and zero time to write/type any of it down.

anonymous asked:

can sensory overloads just be feeling very uncomfortable and almost like the bad sensory thing is strangling you? like you almost can't breathe? or does it have to be you acting out like hollering and stuff because it's so bad? when i experience bad sensory things i usually am very quiet and don't do anything except whats been mentioned before. i had trouble explaining what i experience i'm sorry

Acting out and hollering and such is typically a meltdown, not sensory overload. Meltdowns often result from sensory overload, but not all sensory overload leads to meltdowns. For many, sensory overload can lead to shutdowns which involve difficulty speaking, difficulty moving, and retreating inwards. Basically, a meltdown is an outward explosion and a shutdown is an inward implosion. 

Sensory overload itself is simply becoming overwhelmed by sensory input. This can present differently for different people. For me, I usually experience it as everything getting to be too much. Sounds seem too loud. Lights seem too bright. Touch is awful. Existing feels awful. Sometimes I experience what you describe, the sensation of being strangled/not being able to breathe. 

-Sabrina

4

This is a friend over on Instagrams doing!! She posted a pic of Varric smiling and I had to see what smiling Solas looked like… So yeah! This is what he would look like if he really liked showing us those gnashers… 🤔 I feel very conflicted… Nice to see him smile and all but hmmm…. Also, I think we should all ignore the fact that he looks a bit like Gargamel in the bottom left pic… Yes… As you can see, I have had a very productive morning and got many, many important things done… *pats self on back*

Fleur Delacour

17.05.07 fancafe - bts_Rap Monster

00:53
may is….may is the month of family.

since childhood, may felt more like the middle of the year than June or July. I thought it was the same month as inflection point of the year. It has a lot of public holidays too.. Labour Day.. Buddha’s Birthday.. Parents’ Day.. Teacher’s Day.. but of course the main (holiday) is Children’s day !

therefore, it becomes may bam! my heart would flutter pointlessly. It’s the month with many days off from school right? I think everyone would do it if you have school days…maybe. Isn’t it that the weight of may alone approaching distinctly, perhaps our childlike innocence is still alive?

the last end of year stage occasion.. everyone, the members and company too said 2017 all together. we’ve already approached half way through the year, time really flies. yesterday I thought about the word “future”.미未(not) 올래來(coming). A word that we live by bound the most together with words of happiness and love. but suddenly there is not future. I thought that.

because its already may of 2017 that we waited eagerly for, maybe the that future is just a myth. because the most important thing is right now. I thought that saying to do it in the future- later on- that future would never come. something about it is superficial but now is the future soon. I’ve always hoped for something for the future and for something to change, but then I couldn’t manage to smell of the trees of the present. it seems that there is a little water given too to speak of. that the present is the future soon

you may be curious. In the meantime I’m getting a some things ready that are fun again. because we have a lot of things to prepare, the pace is a bit slower than before. because we want to make them more carefully and elaborately. I miss when I didn’t know about the world and had fears of the old past. but there are pros and cons. I think I want to show you since I did it so finely. still..I’m daring to do my best. dare I.

BTS is barely starting. Up until now, we have tried things we haven’t before and we want to try more. It’s barely may more or less.. It doesn’t feel like may has come somehow. The may now and the may 10 years ago have many differences but, when I see my little cousin getting excited to go to lotte world, I’m still thrilled and envious. we will be like this. the weather is warm despite it getting hotter as the summer quickens.

how is everyone’s may? In your hearts, me. us. I thought (about that) for a moment, what season, what month will i stay in. But it’s sad that I can’t hear all the stories. I will try to do my best though. Like music if I can do it. warm and hotly.

trans; @hobuing | do not repost

6

The level of questioning I was under, coming at such young age. People asking me, “What do you think of this? Who are you, who are you, who are you?” I felt so inadequate because I just didn’t have answers yet. I had so many friends who had a clear sense of self. Who knew that they liked certain things, like the smell of grass, or what their favorite color was. I envied those girls because I was so unsure of myself. I questioned everything. I was terrified by the level of interest in me. I spent most of my time trying to convince everyone I was incredibly boring because I needed privacy and a minute to figure myself out. — Happy 27th Birthday Emma Charlotte Duerre Watson! (April 15, 1990)

“Am I at ninety-four yet?”

Neil asked.

He was not at ninety-four. Ninety-four was the whispered words, “Thank you. You were amazing.” They echoed inside Andrew’s head over and over, like they were an offering, a prayer, a goodbye, like they were pushed out of his body with his dying breath. It was irritating and he was going to bring it up on the bus. He was going to spell it out nice and slow how Neil needed to stop living like he was dying and start living like the exy junkie he was.

Ninety-five was turning around and seeing nothing. Not nothing in the sense that Neil was nothing, but nothing in the sense of panic, of worry, of standing on the edge of the rooftop looking down thinking “Would it hurt if I fell?” The space where Neil should have been filled with emotions that Andrew swore he would never feel again.

Ninety-six was finding his bag. It wasn’t the bag that held his entire life, that was locked away in the Fox Tower, safe. It was the bag that held his future. A future he knew Neil wanted in the way he clutched the key he gave him back in August. A key that was left in the God forsaken bag with Neil nowhere in sight.

For ninety-seven, Kevin was there. The other foxes were there too but the words Kevin formed with his breath passing over his voice box and the movements of his tongue and jaw, were the only things that mattered. Kevin’s mouth moved, sound traveled in vibrations through the air, hit Andrew’s eardrums, and then his hands were around Kevin’s neck. There were lies and half-truths and Andrew hated those. Again not in the sense he hated Neil but in the sense that he hated the word ‘please’ and ‘misunderstanding’. He hated how he didn’t hate Neil because of all the lies. And for that, ninety-seven.

Ninety-eight was the phone call that Neil had been found.

Ninety-nine was walking through the hotel door and seeing him crumple in agony. It was the hissed “Don’t” as he did his best sooth away the pain. It was the eyes that were Nathaniel’s with hints of Neil peeking out behind his irises. It was the look of a man staring helplessly as the executioner readied the guillotine. It was the words “I’m sorry” like he had something to be sorry for. It was his attitude that no matter how beat up he got, remained impeccably intact. And it was the question he still had the gall to ask: “Am I at ninety-four yet?”

“You are at one hundred.”

10

philinda + otp tags

9

“From now on, I’ll act as your father. I’ll protect you, no matter what happens.”

anonymous asked:

Hey Viria, sorry to bother you but this is something I really need to talk about with someone and your blog has always been a safe space to me. I'm turning 20 this year and I've never been in love, nor have I had a boyfriend/girlfriend before. I don't know, if I'm too picky or if my standards are to high, but I never felt something like a crush before. I don't know if it's normal but I really just want to feel having butterflies in my tummy. I don't know what to do or what is wrong with me.

there’s nothing wrong with you, please don’t think this way! 

There are few things I can offer about this:

- don’t feel alone if the insecurity you feel is connected to the age, you aren’t alone, there are so many young people in their twenties who hasn’t been in relationship before. Even for me, even though I had minor school crushes, I only had one relationship and it wasn’t serious and I now know it wasn’t love. So for me it happened when I turned 22.

- it might be that you feel the red flags about people and haven’t met someone you connect to yet. I know a few people who are close to their 20s but haven’t had crushes before, it’s normal too, we all are different.

- movies always make us feel like we have to be in love to be complete, because EVERY teenager is in love in the movies. They show the morally high educated girls and say they always have to be in love to be good. Don’t be too pressured by the movies; they aren’t real life.

- as for butterflies: they aren’t always good. I mentioned minor crushes I had: I used to have all the knees buckling, heartbeating too fast, and I have to say that it wasn’t the healthiest. With as much as I had of physical stuff happening, I could never even talk to that person. So..not feeling the butterflies, but feeling warm and cosy and content and just, very secure, is what I think matters more. Deep connection matters more. Attraction is important too, of course, but the physical stuff fades over time, bonding stays.

- THE LAST BUT NOT LEAST. Try looking up aromantiсism, asexuality, demisexuality. I am not the most educated person with this; but there are people who don’t feel romantic or sexual attraction towards others. There are people who need to really spiritually and mentally bond with someone to start being attracted to them. You might be aromantic or asexual or demisexual!

Hope it helps at least a bit, remember you aren’t alone and there are always people who feel the way you do! You will have it all figured out soon, don’t worry<3

Wolfgang & Sun

Originally posted by sensatessource

  • They don’t say much, but they FIGHT for their loved ones
  • They don’t show emotions, but they PROTECT their loved ones
  • They’ll kill for survival, but they’ll DIE for their loved ones
  • They don’t smile much, but when they do, it comes from PURE happiness
  • I was SO HAPPY to see so much interactions between Sun and Wolfgang happened in this season – I loved this pair since Christmas special when they had this whole “if you need help” “I’m fine. If you need some air” “I’m good” then * both smirk * scene
  • There are so many things Sun and Wolfgang share in common
  • Both are the quiet ones in the cluster; they are badasses; and THEY DESERVE PEACE & HAPPINESS – and LOVE!
  • They might be strong on the outside, but they have soft heart inside; and that sometimes make these two people blame themselves for what they’ve done
  • Their mothers loved them; their fathers…one was abusive and the other was ignorant; and their other family members (like Steiner and Joong Ki) just couldn’t leave them in peace
  • One thing they don’t share in common, other than their fighting style, is that when Sun needs help, she asks for help. Whereas Wolfgang would NEVER, EVER ask for help – even when he’s being captured and tortured by Whispers
  • I really hope that in the end, both Sun and Wolfgang find their own peace (except rest-in-peace bullshit, I won’t allow it)

Favorite moments in season 2 (spoilers!)

2x02 Who Am I?

Originally posted by warinfinities

– I like that when they’re visiting each other, neither of them says ‘hi’ or ‘what’s up?’ Instead they just simply have a short eye contact and that’s it. The zoo scene sums up Sun and Wolfgang’s relationship. And we love this quiet-yet-we-know-each-other-by-just-looking-at-one’s-eyes. PERFECTION

– Not just from this scene, but most conversations between Sun and Wolfgang are short, very straightforward & concise…and that’s what makes their dynamic so real and sincere because we know both characters share a deep connection through their unspoken pain

2x03 Obligate Mutualisms

@thelovelylights

– OK, I love Sun just the way she is. But I absolutely love her when she embodies Wolfang. Two words; and her level of being badass just exploded there. Hats off to Doona’s perfect portrayal of Wolfgang/Max

2x07 I Have No Room In My Heart For Hate

@princessamericachavez

– In graveyard scene, everyone from the cluster talks to her from their heart…from their experience. What differentiates Wolfgang from rest of them is he’s the only one who says ‘the world would be better without’ people like Joong Ki and Wolfgang’s father. Revenge is a double-edged sword. It’s bittersweet. And Wolfgang has already had a taste of revenge..several times. However, I don’t think sweetness of revenge or his skepticism about justice are entire reasons why he says it. I think it’s because deep down he knows Sun is stronger than she thinks; strong enough to not only make Joong Ki pay for her father’s death but also take in the bitterness of revenge

2x08 All I Want Right Now Is One More Bullet (1)

@fvuckyeahsense8

– YES! YES! YES! A thousand times YES! THAT SMIRK IS EVERYTHING! I don’t we need more explanation to this, at all * drops mic *

2x08 All I Want Right Now Is One More Bullet (2)

@s8gif

– OMG. Did they literally finish each other’s sentence? OH YES THEY DID! * drops mic, again *

2x07 I Have No Room In My Heart For Hate & 2x09 What Family Actually Means

@litoshernandos

@superdamnvers

– This is not an interaction between them, but I really wanted to go over this little parallel scenes. Another thing I love about Sun and Wolfgang is they don’t use their strengths to bully someone or to just show off. They use them to protect their loved ones when they are treated like shit by shitty people not nicely

2x11 You Want A War?

@nestarearland

– I know I didn’t include “I would” in Gala scene. Doesn’t mean I don’t like it; it’s just kinda goes along with what I’ve written in graveyard scene. I didn’t want to be redundant. But yeah, I liked that scene too: Wolfgang in gangsta mode walking by Sun’s side while others are trying to stop her XD

– But back to the point, I personally like this scene more simply because I love when Wolfgang shows his gentle and caring side of him towards his cluster. Like when he cared for Will [x]. Also, we don’t really get to see Sun being afraid a lot (I mean of course, she’s a warrior), so it was kinda good to see her being weak and vulnerable for a moment but then quickly regaining her calmness after her cluster reassures she’s going to be fine. It shows how much Sun trusts her cluster; and how much her cluster cares for her (PLATONIC LOVE RIGHT HERE PEOPLE!)


I would say most interactions between Wolfgang and Sun happened during ‘sharing’ – resulting great action sequences, which also proves (again) that these two are not talkers; they’re fighters. Maybe that’s why they make an awesome pair!

9

Sick Boy & Renton ; through the years

We’ll get through this thegither, and he walks into the stair, compelling Renton to follow.
Ah know that, mate, Renton says, almost distracted under the luminosity of the stars, till the heavy door, closing behind them on the spring, extinguishes their light.

hi! i remade a week ago and i didn’t expect to get so many of my mutuals back + some new followers so i’m here with my first follow forever with this blog (and second in general)! i really love you all so much and i keep saying i’ll try to interact with more of yall but i never do :(  so this is my way of telling you all that i appreciate all of you!

i was gonna do a thing for favorite blogs but i have such a hard time choosing because i love yall too much (id put a lot of hearts here if i was on mobile, just so you know)

LIKE TWO OF MY MUTUALS UNFOLLOWED WHILE I WAS IN THE MIDDLE OF THIS SO IM SORRY BUT IDK WHO YOU WERE SO YOURE STILL TAGGED IGNORE ME PLEASE ASDJFSFJASDF 

Keep reading

FACTS ABOUT CONNOR MURPHY (spoilers)

So I have decided to post all the facts and hints about Connor Murphy’s past that are shown in the musical. It’s hard to make out considering people in the fandom usually focus on the lies Evan tells to figure out Connor’s personality.

To get this conclusion (which I will post in a second) I literally skipped all scenes concerning Evan’s lies and went directly to the Murphy family and what they say. None of these facts/hints involve what Evan said about Connor.

First of all, I’ll say now that I have put my own interpretation on each of these facts.

And so, I will put all FACTS in BOLD.
Anything out of bold is my own interpretation and how I see it to be. It’s up to you to agree with me or disagree.

First, I will post my conclusions on each family member, and then afterwards, I will post the reasons for each one.

Zoe

Zoe was an emotional and verbal abuse victim. There is no evidence of physical abuse, although there were threats that could have potentially led to that. She has all the right to not grieve over Connor, in all honesty, she could have sent him to the police for what he did, but as an abuse victim, that is very hard to do. Connor was probably the cause of most of her insecurities and she hated him for that. The unhealthy habit of taking out his anger on the nearest person to him probably made him lash out at his sister whenever he had a panic attack. Judging by how he really did care enough to keep the creepy letter about his sister, written by Evan, in his pocket for 3 days before he committed suicide, it’s safe to say that he really regretted being mean to his sister and actually cared about her.

Connor’s mom, Cynthia

Connor’s mom was a woman obsessed with reputation. She’s known as the rich man’s wife, and wants more than anything to be a regular family. But because her son had mental illnesses, her perfect image was ruined. She acted as though she was there for him but when it came down to it, she did nothing. She pushed for therapy but after a while, her husband took him out of it because “it wasn’t worth the money,” and she basically went, “welp, I tried.” I will quote what I say later: Connor’s mom might not actually be sad that her son is gone, but rather, she’s ashamed that her family actually doesn’t care. It seems like Connor’s mom is filled with regret for not being there for her son, and she’s forcing her family to act like they regretted it too, because that’s what a real family should have been like. But this is only a personal theory.

Connor’s dad, Larry

Connor’s dad might be one of the main sources of his depression. It is very obvious to me that Connor’s dad believed him to be a disappointment. He didn’t grieve for his dead son and only played along to make his wife happy. He’s annoyed by the whole situation. It even seemed like he hated the fact that there was fake remnants of his son in Evan. Almost like he wished Connor wasn’t friends with Evan so he could just forget all about him and not need to deal with it. At some point he was a kind father. When they went to the orchard together for picnics, it seems like they were a happy family. Connor’s dad had played with their toy plane together and had some great memories. The whole family practically forgot about this, though. Connor’s dad didn’t cry at his own dead son’s funeral. I think that sums it up.

Connor Murphy

Connor was a complicated person. He had many different mental illnesses. I could research which ones he probably had, but there’s probably already a post somewhere on it already. One thing for sure, is that he was unstable. He might not have been like that his whole life, but at the time of knowing him, the time he was briefly alive in the show, he was incredibly unstable. Everything and anything could set him off, and he probably hated that about himself as well. Pushing away everyone near him that could possibly help and hating himself for doing so, spiraling himself into a closed minded world of self-hate and regret, which is something that many people can relate to, including me. He did a lot of horrible things to his sister and to his family. I don’t blame his family for not actually grieving him, he was a really bad person. The problem is, he could have been a good person as well. He had all the potential to get better. He talked to Evan, probably wishing to say sorry about pushing him earlier in the hall. He was trying, he wanted to try. He wanted to get better. He just gave up too soon.

This post is very long! I’m sorry. If you’d like to read more, I’m putting the reasons I’ve come to these conclusions under the cut.

Remember, ALL FACTS ARE IN BOLD. Anything else is my personal interpretation.

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Just some fic recs...

I’ve read a lot of really good fic this year and I just thought the best of the best deserved some recognition.  I tried to weed out the super popular fics, but some still show up because I love them that much.  Also, the ships are numerous and varied.

Running on Air–eleventy7; Drarry
Draco Malfoy has been missing for three years. Harry is assigned the cold case and finds himself slowly falling in love with the memories he collects.
*I would murder people to protect this fic.  It’s beautifully written, well-plotted, original, and it reuses certain sentences, making them more poignant the later in the story they’re used.  Like, fuck me up*

the ghost of you–kissmesexybatman; Klance
When Keith goes missing without a trace, all his family and friends are able to do is move on with their lives. When he shows back up after a year, they have to convince him they still want him back.
*I may be slightly biased because the coolest person in the world wrote this, but let me tell you, it’s emotionally heartwrenching, wonderfully written, and gives you a happy ending without sacrificing the needs of the characters*

My soul is an empty carousel at sunset.–dawnstruck; Otayuri
Yuri grows up and grows older and grows into himself. Otabek helps. It just takes a while to get there.
*I’m demi and this fic described exactly what that experience has been like for me, as it features a demi!Yuri.  Beyond that, it was sweet and genuine and I adored it*

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