and i do feel they had a strong relationship

6

Growing up, I always had this idea that I needed to be dating someone in order to feel valid–and a lot of that had to do with the representation of teenagers on TV. You almost never saw a high school girl that wasn’t either in a relationship or pining over one. With Riverdale, I hope we instill a completely different notion in our youth; you don’t need a relationship to be happy, and that being a strong, independent woman is powerful. I really love that about this show.

do you ever just think about how blessed we were with “Johnny and Dora” like

  • jake FINALLY TOLD AMY he likes her
  • but knew that she didn’t want anything to happen so he didn’t force anything
  • the iconic Undercover As Lovers™ trope
  • not one
  • not two
  • but THREE kisses
  • and the first two were literally not necessary at all
  • there were so many other ways to handle those situations
  • but NOPE
  • “THIS IS HAPPENING”
  • and they both mutually decided not to do anything bc they’re great as detective partners
  • and that relationship is SO IMPORTANT to them that they didn’t wanna jeopardize it
  • but then holt had to leave the precinct
  • and jake knew exactly where amy was: the evidence lock up
    • side-note headcanon: amy goes to the evidence lock up when she’s feeling sad or stressed and jake always knows how to comfort her in there
  • and he knew she just needed to talk it out and as she was talking he was just like
  • ‘wow she’s so pretty and she’s so strong and i love her???? wait what’d she say’
  • and then, in the words of charles boyle,
  • “BOOM kissing”
  • the forehead touch !!!!!!!!
  • them both literally being speechless after the kiss
  • and just staring at each other
  • just
  • we are so blessed
  • i’m gonna go rewatch “Johnny and Dora” for the hundredth time now bye
Just another Camren Theory

Things to be clear before I begin this theory:

  • All the facts are assumptions. 
  • All the facts are of my own mind (you are not required to agree).
  • I’m definitely not good with specific days/months/years.
  • My native language is not English… so… sorry about some mistakes!

Well…despite not being good with the timeline, let’s start! Let’s do this!
Fasten your seat belts and stay comfortable.

Every-fucking-time I read questions and theories about Camren, everyone has the same impression: They had a relationship for almost ¾ years. We could all see that in all those years, the one who seemed most comfortable in giving us “hints” and talking a little more quietly about Camren, was Camila.

We have all seen that Lauren didn’t deal well with the situation about this relationship in the beginning. She always seemed to be in conflict with herself, with what she felt and what or whom she liked (boys/girls).

Starting from the assumption that Camren had a relationship for almost 4 years, I began to think about these facts that I will present below.

This theory doesn’t have much to do with Camila’s departure from the band, but some facts inevitably intertwine.

At the beginning of 2016, everything looked fine between Camren. The M&G pictures in Brazil showed that everything seemed to be okay. The concerts in Brazil were from 28/June to 05/July of 2016.

I believe they were together and happy at the time, but some conflict had already begun.

Camila already showed signs of tiredness, but not of sadness. Lauren looked very happy and comfortable nearby Camila.

Okay, another point I’d like to say, in that theory I’m not going to involve Lucy, because Laucy as a love relationship isn’t something I believe, so all the trips that Lauren made with Lucy, for me it was like “best friends time”.

Not only in Brazil, but throughout the beginning of the 7/27 Tour they were looking at each other at the concerts and seemed to be okay.

And the M&G things just seemed to be fine too…

At some point, things started to change. The soundcheck began to get increasingly weird, the girls increasingly separated from Camila. Camila was getting more and more depressed, sad and tired.

So what happened? Lauren betrayed Camila? Camila betrayed Lauren? Did they fight? Did they split up? Well… Several times we saw that Lauren was trying to remain happy while Camila had a miserable look of sadness. They were getting farther away in the soundchecks, Lauren disappeared and they said she was stuck in traffic and they did not interact anymore. They did not even sit together anymore.

Of everything I believe about Camren, it’s impossible for me to think about betrayal. At least the way I see this relationship. Pure, crazy, dependent, strong, intense and REAL! No, I don’t think there was betrayal, we know our girls, can you imagine Lauren doing that with her cute bow-girl? Can you imagine Camila doing that with her planet-green-eyes-girl? Well, call me naive or whatever, but I can not!

Camila had a problem with her anxiety and the problems began to be exposed. I think she began to feel the pressure of having to choose and decide about her future and their relationship. 

It seems that things have gotten complicated and they have been moving away. Camila was the farthest.

Ok … here comes what I think happened. Camila expressed her willingness to leave the group, arguing perhaps that she needed more freedom to write, to show her art the way she always dreamed. I believe that all this, in a way, they already wanted her to be a solo artist because they acted to make it happen naturally (they could have double money with this). I also believe that part of the Fifth Harmony team didn’t want that. This includes the parents of the other girls. Of course, everyone knew that the band would be able to continue without Camila, but that would certainly shake a certain structure they already had.

I think Camila wanted and had enough courage to assume Camren, but when the idea of going out as a solo artist came along, I believe it has retreated in her mind. I think this was “offered” to the Camren couple, like “okay, you guys will have more freedom, you can get out of this fucking closet and be freer, but you have to stay in the band”.

I think Lauren accepted this agreement because we saw that along the Tour, she was getting out of the closet gradually and we saw that Camila was running away more and more.

Lauren seemed very happy, after all, had come to the possibility of getting Camren out the closet and finally be TOGETHER.

But she seemed to be always doing all this alone…

I believe there was a conversation where Lauren made it clear that she was going to jump out of the closet, but Camila backed off because somehow she was warned by her “solo team” that if she was really leaving the band, she couldn’t assume her sexuality. On the contrary, they would have to reaffirm and reinforce her sexuality as HETEROSEXUAL!

Lauren kept doing this on her own and obviously gained the support of the other girls. I think what turned the girls away from Camila might have been that. For years dating Lauren, giving hints all over the internet, making love statements and when it comes time to assume…she leaves the band and let Lauren all alone with this ship to pursue her own dreams. 

I remember when Normani’s mom tweeted something about selfishness.

Well… and Clara seemed to be always posting things to defend Lauren and leave doubts in the air.

Camila’s parents no longer helped with the things about Fifth Harmony. Camila’s solo team was more active than ever and she was making it clear throughout the Tour that it would be the last one with the girls. She was making it clear in pictures, social media, reactions and trying to keep her image as straight as possible.

I think at the end of the day, Lauren still hoped that Camila would stay and assume Camren with her, and I even think Camila thought about it, but she has warned again, that if she assumed Camren, Goodbye solo career!

So I guess everyone remembers what happened when a fan asked her (Camila) if she identified herself with the sun or with the moon (Theory of the Sun & Moon) and she said that she identified herself with the MOON, BUT SHE DID NOT KNOW WHY SHE PERSONIFIES THE MOON AS “SHE”.

And I think everyone remembers Lauren’s reaction, right?

For me, Lauren’s reaction on that day was something like: “okay, I’ve already seen that I’m going to do it myself! No Camren for Camila today (or tomorrow)!!”

I really think Camila kept trying to make Camren continue hidden. I guess she didn’t want the relationship to end, but Lauren wanted to assume her sexuality. I think in a way, they initially reached an agreement, after much talk, including and especially between the two 5H X SOLO teams. Like: "she’s going to leave, Lauren can assume, but she can not put Camila on it.” … and for me, that’s how the idea of giving an “up” in Laucy showed up. I think Lucy knew everything and tried to help her best friend. I think Lauren and Camila came to some agreement between them. I think Lauren refused to continue dating and hiding the relationship and that’s what made Camila sad. 

Pursue my dreams or give them up for love ??? 

She was practically between the cross and the sword and she had to choose.

They knew she would leave …

I think that after Lauren realized that Camila was not going to go back, she was not going to stay, she was not going to assume Camren, she started trying to get away for a bit … but I also think that Camila continued trying to make Camren survive inside the closet. 

That’s when Lauren collapsed on stage…

But Lauren seemed strong after that day. She started going out, going to parties, traveling and also fulfilled her “part” in the “agreement” that was to increase Laucy’s popularity as a couple.

For me, it was something like: “Okay, Camila … you want to leave and you will not assume? I’ll make it easier on you! I will not speak about you and I’ll help you kill Camren if that’s what you need/want.”. I think Lauren was really angry and asked Lucy for help.

That’s why I think everyone started giving indirect through social media … especially the Jauregui family. I think they got mad with the feeling that: “then she says she loves my daughter, they live all this craziness and then my daughter gets alone in this whole shit and carry on her back?? As their daughter leaves the band to make her happy solo career??? What the fuck???”.

Call me crazy, or call me delusional, so we’re more accustomed to this term … but I really believe that’s how came from the drama of Clara unfollowing the Cabello family on social networks, Taylor leaving some twitts, Chris deleting his picture with Camila, Lucy unfollowing Camila, Vero no longer supporting Camila (and Camren) … anyway, summing up …

Camila and Lauren fell in love, even with everything a little confused, they started a relationship, they stayed together a long time, Camila wanted to assume, while not thinking about pursuing the solo career, Lauren trying to hide. Finally, Lauren wanted to assume, but Camila was introduced to the idea of having a career the way she had always dreamed, but for that, she would have to deny and kill Camren for good. Lauren tries to assume with Camila, who decides for her solo career. Jauregui family get extremely angry, the other girls upset (For having followed their relationship for all these years), Lauren’s friends gets upset and angry. Camila with just a little of support, always walking with her mom or with Ashlee Juno, who was practically her only “friend” at the end of the 7/27 Tour in 2016.

What do I think about the present time?

I think Camila keep all this time trying to get back with Lauren and trying to talk to try to keep Camren alive, but hidden from the audience. I really think she keeps trying. 

Why?

Because of everything she posts on social media, for all the hints, for the way she’s been directed to talk more about boys, but at the same time, she still leaves roses on the way to certain "you” that we already know who it is!

No, I do not think Camila is the villain and Lauren the angel. Maybe in the heat of the moment, they hurt too much themselves the way this relationship went. For some time we could see Camila very sad and post things like:

Maybe Lauren hurt her before, maybe they ended up fighting because of jealousy … (Because if you believe Lauren betrayed Camila, what reason would her family have to ignore or “attack” the Cabello family? They could not “complain” if their own daughter had done this to Camila. They would not have the moral for it.)

Maybe Lauren is starting to give in, maybe not. Maybe she still thinks that Camila’s departure and the fact that she was “abandoned” with Camren in her arms was some kind of betrayal. Maybe she’s still hurt. Maybe the Laucy kiss was purposely like: “She does not want me to kill Camren? So that’s how I’m going to do it!” … maybe it was a way to hurt Camila how she felt hurt. I can not really tell what happened, but that’s all I believe in. Obviously, it should not be 100% that way, but this is just another theory, like so many others about Camren.

But Camila seems very happy lately … and Lauren is more beautiful and radiant than ever. Camila smiled again like she did before. Camren ship seems to be sailing again … and we stand strong in this (delusional/crazy) sea!

Zuko X Reader - Hopeless

Request:  Could I have an imagine for A:TLA? Zuko is hopelessly in love with you but while you do return his feelings, you refuse to make any ‘big’ decisions before the war is over, so could the imagine include his many attempts of sealing your hand for him? -Anon

Well, here ya go! It’s really long, like over 2000 words oops.


Yesterday you had kissed Zuko. Today you were avoiding him.

While you and Zuko were close, and you both had strong feelings for each other, you wanted to wait until the war was over and done with to make any rash decisions regarding your relationship with him. It would hurt you too much if something happened to him and you were together. At least this way, if one of you was seriously injured, or even killed, you wouldn’t be losing a partner. You’d only be losing your friend.

“(Y/N)-”

“Zuko, I told you. I can’t, okay? I can’t make any huge decisions right now.”

“Can I remind you that you kissed me yesterday? That seemed like a pretty huge decision.”

“I was tired and overcome with emotions then. I just think it’s best we not get involved romantically until after… all this.”

“(Y/N)-”

“I have to go, Zuko. Toph wanted to spar.” You began to walk away, but paused a moment to look back at the teen. “I just don’t want to risk losing my boyfriend as well as my best friend.” Zuko nodded, which you took as a cue to leave. Zuko understood the reasoning behind not wanting to make the decision before the war, but he thought that was all the more reason to make the decision. If you were about to go to war, it would be good to let go of your feelings, right?

Zuko was determined to at least get you to admit you loved him before the war was over.

Attempt #1: Flowers

“Katara?” Zuko held a bouquet of flowers in his hand. It was small, and the flowers were mostly wilted as they had been growing in a shady, sad spot in a forest, but it was a bouquet nonetheless. He was bringing them to the waterbender to see if she could maybe perk them up, or at least to see if the flowers had the stamp of approval before being given to you.

“Hmm?”

“I have a question. If someone gave you these flowers, would you accept them?” He held the small bouquet out to the girl, and she looked at them before reaching out a hand to hold them closer and take a better look.

“Well, they’re kind of sad, Zuko. Are these for (Y/N)?”

“Yeah.” He pulled his hand away as Katara grabbed the entire bouquet.

“Oh, nice flowers. I didn’t know you and Katara were a thing, Zuko.” You seemed to come out of nowhere, just in time to see Katara taking the flowers from Zuko’s outstretched hands.

“Oh no, I’m not- we’re not… I was just-”

“Relax, I was joking. Katara, Sokka wants us to go get some supplies.”

“Alright, I’m coming.” She handed the bouquet back to Zuko, giving him a quick look of pity before walking off with you. As you walked away from Zuko, Katara leaned closer to your ear. “They were for you, you know.” You sighed, nodding your head.

“I know.”

Zuko simply frowned at your receding figures. He was going to have to try harder to get you.

Attempt #2: Fire

It was a rare night, everyone huddled around a fire, laughing and acting like the world was alright. Katara and Aang sat next to each other, talking in hushed tones to themselves. Sokka was poking at the fire, making sure he kept it aflame despite the fact there were two individuals who could firebend sitting across from him. Toph was doing her best to make Sokka’s attempts fail, sticking rocks up into the fire and kicking pebbles in Sokka’s general direction. You and Zuko just sat next to each other, watching the others and occasionally saying a few words.

You were tired. It was rare you had a night that you weren’t stressing or working, and you wanted to take this opportunity to sleep early, but spending time with the rest of the Gaang was so rare that you were sticking it out. After your fifth yawn in twenty minutes, though, Zuko nudged your shoulder.

“Hey, go to bed if you’re so tired.”

“I’d much rather stay out here with everyone. Besides, it’s more comfortable out here, right?” You and Toph had bent some makeshift couch-like seats for everyone to sit on, and sitting with Zuko on one of the rock couches by a fire was much more comfortable than laying on the ground with only a blanket and a small, worn pillow.

“Go get some rest, (Y/N).”

“I’m not-” you yawned “-that tired.” Zuko simply rolled his eyes, as if to say, “Whatever you say,” and wrapped his arm around your shoulders.

Only thirty minutes later, however, you had fallen asleep. You were pressed against Zuko, arms wrapped around his waist and head resting on his shoulder. Your hair tickled his neck, and your breathing was loud, but he made no effort to move you. Instead, he asked Sokka to grab his blanket and pillow and got comfortable.

The next morning you woke up to the sound of Aang’s laughter and Appa’s noises. You opened your eyes to see Aang playing with his beloved animal, which as strange because you didn’t remember falling asleep outside. It wasn’t until you sat up that you realized you and Zuko had fallen asleep around the fire. You quickly got up, leaving Zuko with the blanket, and went to change. You ran into Katara moments later, and she looked at you with knowing eyes.

“Friends fall asleep with friends, Katara,” you insisted, but she knew what was really going on. Zuko might just succeed in his quest after all.

Attempt #3: Sparring

It was good to practice, especially with the war coming up. You and Zuko were doing just that, sparring in an attempt to brush up on your skills.

“I’m probably not the best person to be practicing with,” you had said over and over, knowing that Zuko planned on going after his sister and that he should be practicing with Aang, a firebender. But Zuko had other plans. He didn’t really need to practice, he just wanted to spend some alone time with you, and work on getting you to admit your feelings out loud.

“It’s fine. It’s always nice to spar with an earthbender.”

“I can go get Toph, she’s a better opponent.”

“No, no, you’re fine.” With that, you two began to train. Toph had taught you some moves, and you were now able to sense where people were with your earthbending. You were practicing that by trying to spar Zuko with your eyes clamped shut.

“You sure you can do that?” he kept asking you, but you nodded every time.

“I’m good. I’m pro.” You would laugh and send a rock his way. Now, you were far from pro. You could kind of sense where he was going, but when it came to his bending, you had no clue when it was coming or where it was going. You were on your butt more than you were on your feet.

“Yeah, you’re a real pro,” Zuko said, holding his hand out to help you get up. You sensed this and reached out to grab it. He pulled you to your feet quickly, and you were launched up. You opened your eyes to see Zuko’s face mere inches away from yours, and you felt his arms hovering around your waist. “Sorry. You’re light,” he said, not making an effort to move away from you. He was staring into your eyes, and you were staring into his enchanting gold ones. You two stayed like this for what seemed like ages. You wanted to pull away, but you simply couldn’t bring yourself to it.

“Hey, (Y/N), using those techniques I’ve been teaching you?” You were broken from your trance and quickly pulled away from Zuko, knowing that Toph would be able to sense how close you two were.

“Yeah. I’m not too good, though.” You laughed, glancing over at Zuko as you did so. “I kept getting knocked off my feet. Think we could practice some more?”

“Sure, I’m not doing anything.” Toph waved, motioning for you to follow her, and you shot Zuko a quick apologetic look.

“I’ll ask Aang if he wants to spar you. Seriously, it’d be better to train with someone who would actually be a challenge.” Zuko shook his head.

“No, it’s fine. I’ll go to town for some food or something.” You shrugged and walked off with Toph, who was shooting you a grin.

“So, you and Zuko were pretty close together back there.”

“Oh, shut up.”

Attempt #4: Clothes

“Zuko! Hey, I need your help with something.” You had your head stuck out of your tent, and you were motioning for Zuko to come in. He slipped in and you immediately began to talk. “Okay, so I thought that since we’re hiding out in the Fire Nation for a bit I should wear some Fire Nation clothing, right? But I think I look ridiculous in it.”

“Ridiculous how?”

“Ridiculously out of place.”

“Let me see.” You dropped the blanket you were using to cover yourself to reveal your outfit. A red, midriff-baring top and a pair of simple red pants. Zuko began to laugh, and you quickly went to cover yourself again. “No, no. You only ridiculous because you tied the top wrong.”

“I did?”

“Yeah. Here, turn around, I’ll fix it.” You spun, and Zuko began to fix the top.

“Thanks. I’m glad I didn’t go outside looking like a complete idiot.” You could feel Zuko’s breath against your neck as he chuckled softly.

“Only I would’ve noticed.”

“Still.” You felt his hands brush against your back as he finished tying your top.

“There. I fixed you.” You turned around and gave him a smile.

“Thanks, Zuko.”

“No problem, (Y/N).” Once again you were in a situation where neither of you could look away. You were frozen.

“Well, I better leave. Now that I can go into town, I want to look at some stuff in this shop Katara told me about.” You broke the trance, moving around Zuko to leave your tent. “Thank you again.” Zuko simply smiled in response, and you left him alone in your tent.

Attempt #5: Before the Battle

“(Y/N).” You stopped to turn to Zuko, who had just called your name.

“Yeah?” You were getting ready to go with Katara and Zuko to find Azula, and you still had to grab one more thing when Zuko called you.

“Look, we’re about to go fight my sister. She’s really dangerous.” You nodded your head.

“I know, Zuko. Can I go? I have to grab something…”

“(Y/N), just wait.” He put his arm on your arm to keep you from leaving, and you looked up at him. Once again, you were trapped in his golden eyes. Slowly, he leaned down and connected his lips to yours. You found yourself almost kissing back, but you pulled away.

“Zuko, I-” Words escaped you. You couldn’t think of what to say. “I can’t kiss you.”

“But you have.” Zuko had tried to understand, but at this point, he couldn’t. You were kissing him back, dammit! But you still wouldn’t admit anything. “(Y/N), I love you. I’m in love with you, you know that. How could you not? But you still refuse to admit your feelings for me. I just want to hear it once, ‘I love you, Zuko.’ Just once, (Y/N).” You bit your lip.

“Zuko, I’m sorry. I’ve made my decision. Not until after this.” You shook your head, a sad look on your face. “Look, I have to grab something, then we can leave. Go get Katara.”

Zuko had messed up. He realized that as you walked away.

What Got You:

Everything seemed to happen in slow motion. Zuko was taunting Azula, something about not using lightning. Azula then shot some lightning at Katara, who Zuko quickly jumped in front of. He was struck, fell to the ground, and you heard yourself and Katara scream as Azula laughed. You began to sprint towards Zuko, but Azula shot at you with some fire, so you stayed back. Katara tried to approach him to heal him, but Azula then began to fire at her.

There were tears streaming down your eyes. You watched in fear as Azula went after Katara, but you knew the waterbender could handle herself, so you ran to Zuko. You collapsed beside him, held his hand, begged him to be alright. It felt like ages before Katara chained Azula down and ran over to heal the fallen prince.

“Thank you, Katara,” he mumbled after she had worked her magic. He sat up slowly and looked from Katara to you. You were both crying.

“Zuko,” you whispered through your tears. “Zuko, I thought you were going to…” You broke into tears again, wrapping your arms tightly around his torso, momentarily forgetting his was injured. “I thought I was going to lose you.” Zuko loosened your grip around his body and looked you in the eyes. He reached a hand up to wipe a tear from your cheek.

“You tied your top incorrectly,” he said after a moment, causing you to giggle slightly through your tears. “It’s actually better that way, I think.” You couldn’t stand it anymore. You leaned in and captured his lips with yours. It was a gentle, sweet kiss, and you never wanted it to end.

“I love you,” you whispered against Zuko’s lips. “I’m in love with you.”

“I know,” Zuko mumbled back, a small smile playing on his lips. “Now kiss me again.”

Unconcealed: Part 2

Unconcealed: Part 2

Word count: 7.3k

Genre: smut, angst

There will be and epilogue to this. Hope you enjoy, it does get a little angsty. I almost cried while writing one part, haha. 

(Gif not mine)

Part one


You and Taehyung had been secretly seeing each other for three months now. He would sneak into your apartment some nights and stay over, sometimes you’d go to his house and sneak in. Although Taehyung didn’t like the fact that you two were sneaking around but he had such strong feelings for you he did whatever you wanted with no second thought. He knew it was to hide from your roommate but he also thought this had something to do with the fact that you hadn’t been in a relationship since Will. He didn’t want to bring it up. He knew he should but he was so head over heels for you he didn’t want to ruin anything.

Keep reading

Lana Del Rey on Religion

“My understanding of God has come from my own personal experiences… because I was in trouble so many times in New York that if you were me, you would believe in God too. When things get bad enough, your only resort is to lie in bed and start praying. I dunno about congregating once a week in a church and all that, but when I heard there is a divine power you can call on, I did.“ 

“Well, I mixed it with my studies in theology, because it was the best school for the Jesuit faith and all of the Jesuits taught philosophy classes. There was just a lot of talk about going back to that basic question: Why do we exist? How did reality come to be? Why do we do what we do? And how not to become the butcher, the baker, the candlestickmaker, the guardians of the middle-class—that really interested me. I don’t know. Yeah, I loved being around people who wondered why we were here.”

“I guess I would say that the beautiful thing about feeling connected to something greater is that even at my lowest point I always have a feeling that I’m being taken care of. “

“And Jesus—I mean, being raised Catholic, it was just a way of life. Spirituality and religion were strong. I was in Catholic school until I was 13. Like a lot of other people, I think foundationally I was hymn inspired—musical hymns, not Him, Jesus. [Laughs.]”

“Like so many people, they always state the difference between faith and religion. The faith that I’ve come to find is a science of my own through lots of trials and errors. I’ve been through so many different walks of life that I’ve needed to ask a lot of questions that no human power can answer. I’ve had to seek a lot of guidance. I’ve had to pray a lot because I’ve been in trouble a lot. But it’s not until you do that that you realize there are answers out there to be found.”

To thine own self be true. Seek and ye shall find. There’s a science to prayer, I would say. I think sometimes when you’re really faced with a huge life dilemma or problem and you’ve turned to every sort of thing for answers, sometimes the last resort is to pray and to put out a question to the universe in your mind. Even when you put your question out there, you ask that invisible whoever “What do I do?” you sort of get answers; you forget the problem all over again.”

“I went to a Catholic school called St. Agnes and I loved going to church. I was very interesting and curious about the idea of a divine plan and that there was something bigger than us out there. I don’t have a traditional Catholic view of religion or God though – but I enjoy the feeling of being looked after in the spiritual sense.”

She attended a Catholic elementary school called St. Agnes, and was the cantor of the church across the street. “I loved church,” says Del Rey. “I loved the mysticism, the idea of something bigger, the idea of a divine plan. For me, the concept of religion transitioned into a really healthy idea of God–I don’t have the traditional views of a conservative Catholic, but my imagination was opened within the big blue-and-gold cathedral walls. I liked the idea of being looked after.”

I would say, ‘I don’t know what’s going to happen.’ She’d say, ‘God didn’t save you from drowning just to beat you up on the shore. All you really need is patience when you have persistence.”

“I feel a strong relationship with God and I feel my ties are with him. That’s how I honestly feel. Everything I do, I do it for somebody I’ve never met before, something in the great beyond. That’s my primary relationship, really, is with something divine. I feel a connection as real with that as I’ve ever had with anybody on this earth.”

“There’s one song called “God Knows I Tried” which has a little gospel feel to it.”

You know what I just realised? Min Hyuk has had multiple opportunities to kiss Bong Soon, yet he hasn’t. I realised that although he likes her, he respects her and, unlike many kdrama leads, doesn’t force her into a kiss. It shows that he cares for her so deeply and he doesn’t want to shatter whatever relationship they have and he wants to confirm her feelings before he does something like that. This is just my analysis, but it really shows how perfect Ahn Min Hyuk is.

F.U.

Originally posted by thugshawn

Requested by anonymous: You should do a Shawn imagine based off the song F.U. by Little Mix I think it’d be so good to see an imagine like that

Word Count: 1,698

Note: this is obviously just writing because Shawn would NEVER do this, but it’s still fun to write ya know. plus the Glory Days album by LM is suCH A FREAKING BOP I LOVE IT ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

-

You knew exactly what had happened the minute he didn’t walk through the door like he promised.

It wouldn’t be the first time, and that’s what caused your heart to sink.

Your eyes landed on the cold, untouched plate of meatloaf and mashed potatoes.

To be completely honest, that’s how your heart felt, too. It wasn’t always like this, though.

There was a time where the both of you were still happy - where you didn’t want to constantly take a bat to everything he owned and let him know he messed with the wrong girl. It started about two months ago; you and Shawn had gotten into a huge fight following several smaller fights that had blown you two out of the water.

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Night Changes

Pairings: Sebastian Stan x Reader

Warnings: Alcohol consumption, unwanted sexual advances (It’s mild but it still might be graphic guys, read with caution) forced kissing, mentioned violence, angst 

Word Count: 1660

Summary: You see Sebastian out a bar months after you broke up and make a decision that goes horribly wrong. 

Request: Hello! Could I request prompt #8 ‘can you hold me?’ With Sebastian Stan? Like they broke up a while ago and one day she is drunk and it’s raining and they run into each other at the bar and he drives her home and fluff perhaps?

A/N: Thanks for the request Sweetheart, hope this is what you were looking for ! I deviated away from the prompt a little, and it’s way more angsty but this was just the idea that came to me. 


Admittedly, it should never have gotten to the point that it did. 

I should have had control over myself, over my emotions. I shouldn’t have drunk as much as I did and I certainly shouldn’t have been dancing as provocatively as I was with a man I didn’t know, letting him think that this was heading somewhere it wasn’t. I could still feel the way his fingers had dug into my hips as he rutted up against my ass and it made me feel sick. His breath had been stale with beer and I could still taste it no matter how many times I washed my mouth out. It was like he was lingering on me, reminding me of everything that had happened.

The night had started out harmlessly enough, a few drinks with the girls after work at the bar just down the road from our office. It had only just opened up and there was no better opportunity to try it out than Friday afternoon after a hard, gruelling week. We were having fun, teasing Sarah over her crush on our boss while we worked our way through our second round of cocktails.

It was only when I offered to get the next round that I saw him, the breath catching in my throat as he laughed, tilting his head back to finish off the beer in his hand while clapping the other onto his friends back. I stood there, in the same spot I’d frozen, just staring. It had been months since I’d seen him, since we’d called things off and honestly, it still hurt just as much as it had back then. Our lives had been in different places, his job taking him away for months at a time while mine continued here in New York.

We had the long distance relationship down pat, phone calls, texts and skype, we managed. But it was when he came home that the problems arose, each of us having to learn how to be together again. It was inevitable that our relationship was going to end.

A knock to my shoulder brought me back from my thoughts, my tongue licking over my lips as I continued on my way to the bar, my heart hammering inside of my chest. He looked happy, at ease and it only made me feel worse.

I took a deep breath as I rested my hands on top of the bar, my fingers drumming on the hard mahogany surface.
“What can I get for you?”
“Vodka,” I answered. “Straight, in a shot.”
The bartender quirked an eyebrow but said nothing as he grabbed the bottle from the shelf behind him, pouring out the shot and placing it in front of me. I threw it back quickly, wincing as the alcohol burned down the back of my throat, the tears stinging at the corner of my eyes at the strong taste. When it was all the way down, I raised my hand for another.

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The One With The Trust Issues

Pairing: Steve Rogers x Reader

Warnings: Angst, fluff

Word count: 996

A/N: This is my entry for @girl-next-door-writes celebration challenge! My song prompt was ‘Signed, Sealed, Delivered I’m Yours’- I love both Steve and that song so much and it also made me think of another member of the team (Have a guess who that might be)

(Gif not mine)

Sometimes, relationships aren’t easy. It certainly hadn’t been for Steve and you. Sure, being the partner of Captain America was difficult at times, with him being gone on missions most of the time, but you had known that before you had agreed to go steady. At first, your relationship had been smooth sailing. Steve was a total romantic and an old fashioned guy, but you loved that about him. He never pressured you into doing anything, he was always ready to wait for you, always patient. But he never opened up completely to you. When you had confronted him about it, after finding him crying in his room, he had refused to talk about his feelings. Later that same night, he had told you that he wasn’t quite sure if your love for him was strong enough. You hadn’t exchanged the “I love you’s” yet - mainly because the two of you had decided to take things slow and because you were focused on gaining Steve’s trust before shocking him with any sudden declarations of love. Therefore, Steve doubting your feelings for him hurt you quite badly, already you tried to hide your inner turmoil from him. You promised to show him, that your love was strong enough for him, but he insisted on taking a break.

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I’ve been thinking about this line a lot because I feel like it made a big statement in terms of Shelagh and Patrick’s relationship and how Shelagh views it. How many times has Shelagh just wished they could be “any other couple?” When she was Sister Bernadette and finally realised her feelings for Patrick, she wished they could be any other couple then and not the Nun and the Doctor. She probably longed for it when her and Patrick first announced their engagement, because if they were any other couple she wouldn’t have had the fear of what other people would think of their relationship. She probably wished for it when she first discovered her infertility because in her eyes “any other couple” would have been able to have a child. There were probably endless nights when Patrick got called out for work when she wished they were like any other couple because she wouldn’t have had nights alone. She wouldn’t have lost her husband to work. And even during her pregnancy she longed for it because if they were any other couple Patrick would have been able to solely play the role of Father and not Doctor.

But when she’s in labour, without him, because she wants to be like any other couple, she realises she needs him. They will never be like any other couple because if they were they wouldn’t have the bond and strong relationship that they do. It is this moment I feel like Shelagh truly accepts that their relationship will never be like any other couple but that’s okay, because if they were they wouldn’t be where they are now. To echo Sister Julienne, their relationship is the sum of all they ever did, and felt, and were.

Abused

Prompt: “ Can you do a Jax imagine where you guys have been like best friends since you were really young and usually tell each other everything but he finds out your in an abusive relationship and keeping it from him. So he confronts you about it and admits his feelings for you and of course takes care of the guy…lol Thanx! I love your writing and I’m so glad your doing S.O.A now😊💓”

Word Count: 488

A/N: I’m glad I’m finally watching it! Thanks for the request!! 

P.S. I know that this is a touchy subject. So I want you readers to know, if you’ve ever been in an abusive relationship, or you’re still in one, you’re strong. And you deserve better. I love you.

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You’re Back

Request: Hi luv ur blog can u do one where u and newt broke up and 1 day he has an anxiety attack and the med jacks send 4 u cuz they don’t know what else to do and they know ur the only 1 that can calm him down and when u get there u kiss n make up Xoxo

I thought it would be best if he had an anxiety attack immediately. I hope my writing’s not too cheesy!

Masterlist


You were chatting along with the rest of the Gladers at the dining table, not really eating your lunch. 

“So, you’re going to start tomorrow?” asked Minho, sitting down beside you with a plate of pork chops. 

“Yeah, Alby said I was fast enough. I can’t wait to get started.” you replied, picking on your sandwich. 

“What about Newt?” said Minho. 

You frowned. “I know he’s not going to like this but-“

“Y/N, please tell me you didn’t.” You snapped your head up, catching sight of your boyfriend storming towards your table.

You decided to play dumb. “Did what?”

“Don’t act like you don’t know what I’m talking about. A runner! Are you crazy?!” he shouted. The whole table went quiet and stared at you both.

You involuntarily flinched.

“Do you have any idea how bloody dangerous the maze is?! Huh?! You don’t. You’ve hardly been here at all and now you’re going to get yourself killed. I’m going to Alby and reinstating you as Gardener.” Newt turned around to leave and suddenly you realized you were going to lose your position as a Runner. You couldn’t have that.

You stood up and slammed both of your fists on the dining table. The loud thud got Newt’s attention and made everyone else cringe.

“You have no right,” You glared, your voice eerily calm, “to take away my job as a Runner.”

Newt glared back. “I have every right to do that. I’m the second-in-command and making sure the Gladers don’t have any psychotic suicidal tendencies is part of my job.”

“You mean like you did?” You regretted the words as soon as they came out of your mouth.

Newt went pale, and the Gladers looked at you in confusion.

Only you, Minho and Alby knew what happened that day. The day they found him crumpled on the ground, not dead but not alive either. You hardly knew Newt then, and everyone was told it was an accident. It was the reason he had a limp. Newt only told you the truth after you two started dating.

You just hoped the Gladers wouldn’t put two and two together.

“I’m going to be a Runner and there’s nothing you can do about it.” You said bringing back the original topic. “I’ll even shucking run into the maze if nobody listens.”

Everyone turned their heads towards Newt.

“No you’re not.” he replied authoratively. “I’m going to Alby right now, and as you’re boyfriend I think I have some right to make sure you don’t get yourself killed.”

“And what if you’re not my boyfriend?” you said.

You watched Newt’s expression change, from power to panic and fear. You didn’t like this any much as he did, but you knew you couldn’t have an over-protective boyfriend, no matter how much you loved him.

“Y/N, please-”

“Well, what if you’re not? You won’t have some ‘right’ then will you?” You placed your hands on your hips.

Newt shook his head. “It wouldn’t change anything,” you noticed his voice break; “I would still stop you from going into the maze.”

You frowned, “And either way I’m still going to make it but it would be a lot easier with the former.”

“Y/N, please don’t do this.” Newt whispered. You watched tears pool his eyes, and you fought yours back. You had to stand strong.

But your voice cracked anyway. “I’m breaking up with you.”

It was like the whole Glade went pin-drop silent. You could feel everyone’s mouths fall open in shock. You and Newt were the cutest couple there ever was. The type of relationship which lasted for yeas and eventually led to marriage and a family. You two couldn’t break up, could you?

You wiped your damp cheek with the heel of your hand and ran. You ran like you had never run before, but not towards the maze. Towards your room.

You locked the door and fell on your bed, letting the tears fall silently. You’ll get over it. You told yourself.You weren’t so sure, though.

You weren’t in your bed for three minutes when you heard a knock. You ignored it.

“Y/N!” It was Minho. You would’ve uncared for it if his voice wasn’t so urgent.

As soon as you opened the door, Mino nearly fell on top of you.

“It’s Newt.” He said urgently.

“Minho-”

“He’s having a panic attack and he won’t calm down.”

You felt your throat clog. “Where?”

“Med-Hut.”

You didn’t need to be told anything else. You ran, shoving past him. You were shaking.

There was a huge crowd in front of the hut but they made way for you like Moses and the Red Sea. You panted, coming to a stop in front of Jeff. He was on the floor, holding a hyperventilating Newt and shouting at him to calm down.

You kneeled on your knees; coming to Newt’s eye level. He wasn’t looking at you. He wasn’t looking at anything, just inhaling too harsh and too fast.

“Newt.” You murmured cupping his face with both your hands. “Newt, look at me.”

He glanced at you but he was still hyperventilating.

“I need you.” You whispered, tears falling. “I need you to come back to me.”

His warm brown eyes gazed at you blankly.

“Just breathe.” You pleaded. “Please just breathe. I’ll do anything. I won’t be a Runner. Please, please just breathe.”

You watched him gasp, but then his breathing slowed down gradually. You didn’t let him go, just stared and waited.

You let out a cry of relief when he was absolutely calm.

“Y/N?” his voice was barely audible.

“I’m here.” You said, letting the tears fall freely. “I’m here now and I swear I won’t leave.”

“You swear?” He asked squeezing your hand.

“I swear.” You half-laughed and half-cried at how silly that sounded.

Newt wrapped his arms around you, and you rested your head on his chest, inhaling his scent. You couldn’t believe you had decided to live without it.

Jeff had shooed away the Gladers, telling them you both needed privacy.

After a whole five minutes you finally spoke. “I’m sorry.” You sobbed. “I’m so sorry.”

Newt wiped your tears with the pad of his thumb. “It’s okay.” He whispered, sniffing. “You’re back and that’s what matters.”

You looked at his red-shot eyes and placed your hand on his cheek. “I love you.” You muttered.

You placed your mouth on his, tasting his lips once again. He kissed back, and after a whole minute you pulled away, breathless.

Newt pulled you closer to him. “I love you too.”

You know, the thing is… I actually love Dean to pieces. I know it probably doesn’t seem like it at times, and sometimes I need to remind myself of that, but I really do love him.

And if things were switched, and the narrative of the show heavily focussed on Sam’s POV instead; if the majority of fans/fandom took Sam’s side on everything, constantly justifying everything he ever did, while hating Dean for doing those same things… then I would probably defend Dean with the same passion and anger that I do for Sam.

But that’s not the way things are, at least, not in my 3-year experience. The reason I don’t make many posts about Dean feels or defend his perspective or his actions, is because I don’t need to. There are millions of other people doing that already. Everybody knows why Dean does the things he does - the show focusses on his point of view, and his emotional state almost all of the time.

If I could scroll through the Sam tag after an episode has aired and, like the Dean tag, not find it clogged with hateful comments, I wouln’t feel the need to scream when I talk about Supernatural. But I can’t.

If Sam had multiple complex relationships with other characters, whose relationship was primarily with him instead of Dean, I wouldn’t roll my eyes every time a new character is introduced and gets friendly with Dean. But he doesn’t.

If there was an important character (besides a manipulative demon) who took Sam’s side, and called Dean out on his mistakes/assholery, I wouldn’t feel such a strong need to do that for him. But there isn’t.

If people gave Sam compliments that weren’t so backhanded as “You’re a freak, but you’re not dangerous” and “The only person who screwed up more than you is me.” I wouldn’t be so bitter about the few ‘positive’ Sam interactions that we get. But they don’t.

If Sam wasn’t villified for doing good, healthy things, like leaving an abusive household to pursue an education, or setting boundaries in their relationship, or trying to move on and build a life for himself (like. they. agreed. to. fucking. do.), then I wouldn’t be so damn bitter. But he is.

All the damn time.

Z: I can say that the first “BL” I read when I was a kid was Naruto. NS’s relationship is so strong! More than 400 episodes (I’m doing a Shippuden marathon), Kishimoto sensei takes his time to describe it. When Naruto was a child he’s in love with Sakura, a childish love and he realized little by little he has feelings for Sasuke, beyond rivalry. In Shippuden their relationship became more physical! Haa puberty …. But in the end it’s their declaration. Kishimoto sensei wanted to make a “shônen ai” ending, I think the end had to be their death at the cascade. But he had to force himself to continue because of money (publishing houses are worse than the yakuzas dixit Hideaki Sorachi sensei) and the movie “The Last” appeared (it’s the animation studio who gave this change in the story, Kishimoto sensei himself said he didn’t want Hinata and Naruto to be a couple). Netherless he wrote “Boruto the movie”. For me Hinata like Sakura aren’t important, everything gravitate around Boruto, Naruto and Sasuke. It’s clear that for me Hinata is just the surrogate mother of Boruto. Kishimoto sensei made a lot of couple man x man!
And I can clearly see where he tried to take us with his special chapter on Mitsuki! 

Grace Cardinal

I think season 4 should do an arch where Grace tries to date Jonah because it’s clear she likes him but struggles when it comes to the physical relationship. She loves his personality but for some reason she doesn’t feel the sexual attraction. She then realises that she did romantically like Zoe too but when they had a physical relationship, she presumed her lack of attraction to it meant she was straight.
Grace discovers asexuality and finds out the struggles of a relationship in that form with either Zoe or Jonah. Eventually forming a strong romantic bond with one of them after a few episodes of them trying to understand it’s affect on relationships and how they can still have one that is both healthy and romantic with less physical aspects.

It would be a great transition for the character and would explain a lot of what many interpreted as queerbaiting in DlB. Grace’s feelings towards the few characters we have witnessed have always been people she’s close with platonically- Zig, Zoe, Jonah. And a lot of her development has always shown her although being okay with hearing about physical exploits/relationships , she doesn’t seem particularly secure with experiencing them herself and I possibly think Zoe was the first person grace tried sex with. It’s possible her hesitance for sex is an impact of her distrust of her illness however, it seems very different from that as both Zoe and Jonah she opened up very quickly too in a platonic form and even showed in DlB that she could be flirty and comfortable with relationships that involved handholding, hugging and nonsexual physicality.

It would be a great opportunity for a developed asexual character on such a great platform, aimed at younger adults and teens. Also a great place to show that romantic relationships can still form without sex- Jonah’s storyline in avoiding his addictive personality and past mistakes may fit perfectly with this. The baseline development is there for the writers to have grace be asexual, I think it would be a shame to waste such a positive and educational storyline when you have a character that is well liked and developed enough already for it to not seem false or unrealistic.

Friends

Can we just appreciate that Aelin FINALLY found a female friend that she could confide in? Especially after Nehemia, after she knew her friend had kept so many secrets from her, Aelin was eventually able to trust Lysandra enough to basically tell her “I know I’m going to die so I need a favor.” 

And the absolute loyalty on Lysandra’s part? “I serve her.” Lysandra was willing to put her friend over any potential love life she could have had. And I say that because Aelin and Lysandra both had to have known that this could ruin the relationship between Aedion and Lysandra. Yet she was still so willing to do this for her friend. The bond between them is so amazingly strong and I feel it’s been a bit under appreciated following Aelin’s “dramatic exit.”  

To end on a nice note: Can you imagine the sass and snark between them as Lysandra tried to learn Aelin’s smile? I need that story.

“Mickey Milkovich deserved better”

For all who think this is true, I respect your state of mind. But I have to give mine because I’m fed up of all this hate coming for Ian Gallagher. I mean, did you forget ? That calm, quiet, loving, caring teen? How he was here for Mickey? You say Mickey got beat up, got his feelings crushed while he was doing everything right for Ian. How about Ian being beat up? Gotting his feelings crushed ? Supporting Mickey? I understand that the evolution of this character is fascinating, he was a damaged, crushed and violent kid, he’s now a grown ass, caring, loving and strong man. I understand that Ian’s evolution is violent too. But you know what ? I still love this teen. I remember how he was and how MICKEY WAS THE REASON HE ENGAGED. So, no these two deserve each other, not because of all the crap they do to each other, but because they’re saviors. Ian never had a serious relationship before Mickey, and learned that he could be loved for other than his butt. Mickey never knew love at all, and Ian gave it blindly to him. That’s how love works, that is not perfect and I’m not saying that violence (sadly more than often used in the couple) should be forgotten. I’m saying that they’re ghetto dudes, and that their life’s not a fucking fairy tale, but real life where even the most damaged people can find a hint of light. If you think Mickey Milkovich deserved better, it’s that you fucking forgot.

Never Easy (Part Two) - Jughead Jones

I got an overwhelming amount of love for Never Easy, and demands that I write a second one. So I hope you all like this!!

Originally posted by jonesjughead

You tried to look at the bright side; Betty and Jughead were happy together and you helped them maintain that to a degree. This thought was fleeting though, as more tears rolled down your cheeks. It was like you told him, feelings were never easy; they were messy and they stung when they were hurt.


Around a week had passed since ‘The Incident’, as Kevin so respectfully called it. You told Kevin every detail about what happened after you swore him to secrecy. You trusted him to be your sounding board in that, he was friends with both you and Betty. He would help you come to a decision while also taking into account both of your feelings.

“Is there actually anything that can be done, Y/N?” He asked the night you invited him to sleep over. “I just mean that, you told him you didn’t like him like that already.” You let out a groan from where you were laying on your bed.

“I love him Kevin,” you said, turning to look at your friend. He frowned at the defeated look in your eyes. He walked over and sat on the edge of your bed.

“I’m sorry I’m not more of a help,” he said, “I’ve never had to deal with this before.” You nodded against your pillow.

“You are helping Kev,” you whispered, “thanks for being here.” He smiled at you and you sat up. “How’s Joaquin by the way?” A pink blush rose to Kevin’s cheeks at the sound of the boy’s name. You let out a small laugh and Kevin just shook his head.

“I just keep thinking about how pissed my dad is going to be.” You grabbed his shoulder, squeezing it lightly. He glanced towards you and gave you a weak smile.

“It’ll be okay. Your dad will just have to look past the whole Serpent thing and realize you’re happy. You deserve to be happy Kevin, everyone deserves happiness.” Kevin gave you a look with wide eyes and you raised your eyebrows. “What?”

“In a small twist of fate,” he started, “did your advice for my love life give you the answer to yours?” A big smile spread across his features as your brain worked through what you said.

“But he’s already happy,” you muttered and Kevin frowned. Your mind was a mess to feelings; about Jughead, worrying about Betty’s while also trying to repair yours. The rest of the night held conversations about your confusing predicament and the tangled forest of your feelings.


The next day at lunch, you, Kevin, and Archie caught up with one another. You told Archie about what had been bothering Jughead, not caring to mention your own feelings.

“Wait so Jughead liked you and is dating Betty to get over you?” You nodded at Archie’s synopsis. “How do you feel about that, Y/N?” You raised your eyebrow, asking what he was implying. He rolled his eyes and leaned across the table a little.

“It’s obvious that you like him too,” he whispered and your eyes grew wide. Kevin coughed, choking a little on his apple juice.

“Okay, Mr. Love Detector, what do you suggest I do?” Archie frowned in thought, then shrugged. You groaned and rested your head against the table.

“I’d tell him how you feel,” Archie said suddenly and you lifted your head quickly.

“What about Betty?” You asked, trying to keep your voice down. It was hard to though, you had grown angry about your situation and was getting fed up.

“If Jughead is dating her to get over you, what does that say about the base of their relationship? Is it sturdy or weak?” Archie said and Kevin nodded along. “I’m just saying, if your feelings can topple it, was it really that strong in the first place?” Surprisingly, Archie’s words made sense to you as he spoke. 

“Ginger bull makes sense,” Kevin added and you glanced at your friend, giving him a teasing look. When you lifted your head you saw Jughead and Betty walking towards the table, unreadable looks on their faces.

“Hey guys,” Betty said as she sat down next to Kevin. Jughead squeezed in between Betty and yourself, giving you a weak smile. A silence fell over you until Archie broke the awkward quiet.

“Hey Jughead, do you think you can help me with my English paper,” Archie asked and you tensed up.

“I thought Y/N helped you finish it last week?” You swallowed hard, wondering where Archie was taking this. You glanced down the row at Kevin who looked at you with panicked eyes.

“Yeah, but Y/N recommended you have a final look at it. Maybe the three of us can meet up at Pop’s after school?” You looked up at Archie and glared; but the redheaded boy ignored you and looked to Jughead. The boy next to you nodded response.

“Sure I don’t see why not.” Jughead said and nudged you with his shoulder. “Are you in Y/N?” You looked into his eyes, and nodded against your will. You just couldn’t say no to Jughead Jones.

“Great, I’ll see you both there!” Archie said, standing up from his seat. “I’m going to say to Valerie real quick.” Archie walked off to The Pussycat’s table and left the remaining four of you in silence.

“Do you have any plans after school Betts?” Kevin spoke up, breaking the silence. The blonde looked up at her friend and shook her head.

“I was actually hoping I could hang out with you and Veronica after school.” You felt Jughead tense beside you and you fought the urge you comfort him with a hand on his back.

“Okay, Veronica’s house I’m assuming? Since your mother is crazy,” Kevin asked and Betty nodded softly. Luckily for you, the bell rang very soon. You stood up quickly, grabbing your bag and heading off to your next class. You felt a warm hand brush against yours and you glanced over and saw Jughead walking near you.

“What’s up Jughead,” you asked calmly and he shrugged. Your hands brushed again and you pulled you away. “Shouldn’t you be walking your girlfriend to her class?” Your tone was more harsh than you intended and Jughead stopped walking alongside you. You however, kept going, leaving your crush in the dust. When you reached your class and sat down, you realized that you had been quite bitter. As your teacher started up notes, Archie rushed into the class and found a seat next to you.

“Busy with Val?” You teased him and Archie blushed. He pulled out his notebook and got ready to write down the lesson.

“I saw you and Jughead,” he whispered, “what happened?” You glanced at him, remembering the moment with Jughead.

“Nothing, but what were you thinking about Pop’s after school?!” Despite your whisper yelling, another classmate shushed you. You rolled your eyes and Archie stayed silent. “Don’t worry Y/N,” he whispered, “it’ll all turn out fine”


You met up with Archie and Jughead outside of the main doors after school. Archie greeted who with a grin but Jughead remained silent upon your arrival. It was like last week didn’t happen; the steps you took the week before to repair your friendship with Jughead had melted away. You swallowed hard through your nerves. Archie was planning something, which was scary to you. You often underestimated your friend, so when he had a plan it often caught you off guard.

“Alright let’s go to the diner,” Archie said, leading the way for you and Jughead. On the walk to the diner, Archie tried to lighten the mood that was so obviously dark between you and Jughead. You would try to appease Archie by speaking but Jughead remained quiet.

When the three of you arrived, you ordered some snacks and found a booth. You slid into the booth, Jughead sliding into the one across from you. Archie sat next to you, pulling out his English materials and explained what you had gone over with him before. He had really put on a show for this lie and some part of you was grateful. Jughead talked to him about the structure of his paper, pointed out grammar errors, and mentioned small changes he could make. You chimed in now and again, but let Jughead talk the most. You had missed the sound of his voice and the way his hands moved when he spoke about something his was passionate about.

When he had finished critiquing Archie’s paper, Jughead grew silent again. You glanced up at him and saw that his blueish-green eyes were already on you. You felt your heart flip in your chest, but looked out the window quickly.

“Well I’m going to go pay for our food and use the bathroom. I’ll be back,” Archie said, sliding out of the booth. He left you and Jughead in a heavy silence, one that you wanted to break. Your anxiety fought against you; you’ll only make things worse for you. He’ll choose Betty over you and you’ll be left more hurt than before. You could at least try to repair your friendship again, that was worth a try.

“Jughead,” you started and the boy looked up at you, “what happened?” You lifted your gaze from the table and met his eyes. You saw something flicker in them, but you couldn’t place it. A frown etched on his lip as he remained quiet. You bit your lip nervously, wondering if you should just leave. 

“After we talked last week, I told Betty about what we talked about.” He paused and looked back up at your face. “I told her yesterday and she,” his curled his lips together, “she ended it.” You studied his face, trying to read his emotions but you couldn’t see them. “I told Archie about it and he was there for me. I wanted to talk to you though.”

“I’m sorry Jughead,” you whispered, not reaching out to comfort him like your heart told you to. You just watched as your friend collected himself and looked back up at you. He wasn’t crying like you thought he was; his eyes were still unreadable to you.

“I’m not that upset about it though,” he said, “and it’s strange.” You nodded and smiled to yourself. You met his gaze and saw that the same smile was on his face. “Like you said, feelings are never easy.” You nodded and Jughead looked back down at the table again. You felt the pit in your stomach lurch a little when you thought of telling him the truth. That you had lied about your feelings that night in the very same booth you were sitting in now.  

“I lied,” you whispered out, wondering for a moment if Jughead even heard you speak. His head lifted and you found yourself looking into his perfect eyes. “That night, I thought if I did you’d be happier. I guess I was wrong.”

“Are you saying that you do like me?” Jughead asked carefully, as if trying to dance on glass. You shook your head and looked down at you lap.

“I’m saying that I don’t like you Jughead,” you whispered, “I’m saying that I love you.” You took a long, shaky breath before going on. “I’ve loved you since we were kids, I think. I just never figured it out until last summer. I shouldn’t have lied about it, but I was scared for what friendship we had left and, yeah.” You looked up at him, ready to gauge his reaction. When you looked up he was gone Your eyebrows knitted together and you were about to get up to find him. When you turned to exit the booth, you almost collided with him. He had moved to sit by you in the moments you were lost in thought and rambling on. 

“I’ve been waiting for years for you to finally say that,” he whispered and you gave him a shy smile. “It took you so damn long.” He smiled at you before his hands cupped your jaw, pulling your lips to his. Your hands reached for the trim of his jacket, pulling him even closer and deepening the kiss. You two were too busy to notice Archie standing near the door with his backpack on and his phone out. He snapped a picture of the two of you and smiled widely before leaving. He had tack when it came to romance, although Valerie would argue that he didn’t when it came to his own relationship.

When Archie was safely out the door, Jughead pulled back breathless. You rested your forehead against his and smiled. He let out a sigh and finally opened his eyes to look at you again.

“Way too long” he whispered and you let out a small laugh. You moved your head, pressing a kiss against his lips once more. Before it could get heated, you pulled away.

“I’ll try to plan it better next time,” you murmured against his lips. He smiled at you, pecking your cheek and then your lips again. Now that he could, Jughead never wanted to stop kissing you. You smiled into the kiss, your fingers tangling into his hair. If you your phone hadn’t buzzed with a text notification, who knows how far the kiss would’ve gone. You glanced around the near empty diner and raised your eyebrow. “Where’d Archie go?” Jughead simply huffed as you picked up your phone to look at the text message.

Archie : You’re welcome.

You laughed and Jughead, who had been peppering kisses along your jaw, glanced at your phone. He shook his head and leaned against your side.

“He really knows us better than we know ourselves,” you whispered and Jughead nodded. You were about to return to kissing when you phone buzzed again.

Kevin : UH, ARCHIE JUST SENT ME A PICTURE OF YOU AND JUGHEAD FULL ON MAKING OUT.

Kevin : DID ‘THE INCIDENT’ HAVE A HAPPY ENDING?

You let out a giggle and Jughead smiled. “The Incident,” he asked and you nodded. He shook his head again and pressed another kiss to your cheek.

Kevin : Betty said she ended it between her and Jughead! You got your man!

You ignored that last text though. You were too far gone in the feeling of Jughead’s lips on yours again. Honest feelings seemed to right your past wrongs in the best way. You had only wished you explained your feelings sooner.

anonymous asked:

so I have a question like are you still into boys at all or have you completely grown past that

i wouldn’t say i’ve grown past it i more like. figured it out through trial and error with the information available to me. it’s a weird way to explain it but i wasn’t really a fully formed romantic/sexual being for a while there? i think there’s a genuine difference between what you fantasize about in your head as a teenager and what you learn about yourself through dating and sex. for a long time as a kid all my fantasies were about really traditional romantic heterosexual things and some women would say that makes me bisexual because I have had “urges” to be with men but….all i’ve really learned about myself since becoming romantically and sexually active says otherwise, as does all I’ve learned about compulsory heterosexuality and coded thinking and stuff. all my most carnal fantasies as a youth and now involve women lol. 

what DOES freak me out sometimes and what colors most of my residual self-doubt about my identity is how intense this changeover was, because I identified as bisexual from ages like….15 to 21. the change was influenced solely by my interpersonal relationships, and that has made me wonder if new relationships or information would change my mind about my sexuality or gender again. but that train of thought has never really been about “well maybe someday i’ll be into men” because that possibility..doesn’t really exist for me right now, so I don’t fantasize about it or want to fantasize about it. if that makes sense. it’s just not something I entertain and I only mention it because I think I’ve blogged about this confusing position before of me trying to parse out my relationship to men and masculinity, and that may be where your question is coming from. i’m so much more explicitly comfortable and happy around women and (like many other lesbians) feel so much external pressure to involve men in my romantic life that it’s sometimes impossible to avoid thinking about. but I think it’s important to be open and honest about going through that because a lot of young lesbians go through the same thing whether or not we want to talk about it  ! 

tl;dr i was a total shut-in for basically my entire life until my 20s and i realized before then that i was queer in some regard. but because i had only ever experienced romance through fantasy and never through real human relationships until the last few years it has taken me a while to sort out what is fantasy influenced by all manner of media and narratives and what is how I feel about relationships and people. i don’t believe in a truly natural “internal” self unmediated by the external world but I do believe i have agency in my choice of relationships and life and that i can identify when my agency is being eclipsed by strong social/societal influences, and it’s that process that has helped me realize that i’m only interested in relationships with women.