and his stupid glorious face

But what about Derek coming back to Beacon Hills at some point when things have settled down, and the McCall Pack is in a wonderful place.

And so Derek tries to be a part of the pack, and Scott of course welcomes him with open arms, and Derek tries, he tries to hard to fit in with them all and feel the sense of pack with them again.

He even becomes great friends with Kira, he’s getting closer to Malia, and Liam as well, and I guess Hayden is part of the pack too. Maybe even Mason as well. 

And of course, Derek forms a great wolf brothers bond with Scott.

And then there is Stiles, who he finds himself falling in love with. And when Stiles kisses him months after he’s been back, he feels something settle in him, and he kisses him back, and they begin dating.

And for awhile, Derek does feel like part of the pack, part of something like family again, and Cora even comes to visit. 

But…sometimes he looks around and feels like he doesn’t quite fit with everyone, with the whole pack. Like, it feels right with Stiles, and he’s madly in love with him, and he feels that lifelong bond with Scott, and Kira. 

But the others…they jut make him feel…old. And way out of place. And while he’s getting closer to Malia, he feels like they won’t have anything farther than a casual friendship. 

And it’s starting to get to Derek, that feeling again from before, that he doesn’t really belong, that everyone’s better off without him.

And Stiles can sense that something is wrong with his boyfriend, and it’s starting to worry him. What if it’s something having to do with their relationship? What if it’s Stiles? And even if its not, Stiles doesn’t like the feeling of disconnect, and he doesn’t want Derek leaving again. Stiles doesn’t know if he could take it this time, if he did.

So he confronts Derek about it, and at first Derek is dodging the issue, but then he just kind of…snaps.

“I’m not apart of this pack, Stiles!” Derek yells, and Stiles freezes. Derek shrugs, looking sad. “I never have been. It’s just…it’s not working out.”

And Stiles is freaking out. “So…what are you saying?” Stiles asks, his voice small, and when Derek doesn’t answer, Stiles lets out a shuddering breath. “Are you going to leave?”

And Derek looks at Stiles, surprised. “No, no, i’m not leaving, Stiles,” Derek is quick to say, but then pauses. “Well, not Beacon Hills.”

And Stiles is like “What do you mean?”

And Derek says quietly, “I think I should leave the pack. No more pack meetings or pack movie nights or hanging around the pack. I can be there to help and I’m not leaving you, Stiles, not you, but…I don’t fit with Scott’s pack…with your pack.” 

And Stiles deflates, looking sad, but he understands what Derek is saying. He’s been sensing Derek’s discomfort when the whole pack is together, and it makes sense, so Stiles sighs and steps over to Derek, gives him a kiss and says, “okay. Okay,” and then hugs Derek to him tightly.

And so Derek stops going to any pack meetings, stops doing things with the pack as a whole, and ways in less on supernatural things that come in and out of town, but he does come to help out, and he mostly does things outside the pack and with Stiles. 

But then Derek starts to feel…like he isn’t worth that much. Outside of Stiles, what is the point of him? He doesn’t have that big of a purpose. He’s there to help, but 9 times out of 10 the rest of the pack has it handled, honestly, and Derek is usually staying on the sidelines or doesn’t even have to come. And Scott calls Derek for help less and less. 

And as happy as he is with Stiles, and as in love as they are, Derek needs more than just them, and he isn’t feeling needed. 

And Stiles notices this too. 

And it all culmulates in Derek shrugging and going, “I’m not all that important, Stiles.” 

And Stiles wanted to punch Derek in his stupid, asinine, glorious, amazing face. “What do you mean?” Stiles says, voice low. 

Derek shrugs again and goes “Let’s face it, Stiles, no one needs me. I’m unimportant, I lift right out. I’m stuck on the sidelines.”

“No, no, you aren’t, what are you talking about?”

“What do I really have in this town besides you?” Derek says, and when Stiles looks hurt, Derek goes to him and holds him close. “I didn’t mean it that way, Stiles. You are amazing and I am so so in love with you. You’re it for me, you know that,” Derek says, kissing Stiles’ face, and Stiles leans into Derek’s soft lips. 

“You’re important to me,” Stiles sniffs. “You matter to me.”

And he means every word. 

“I know that,” Derek assures. “I know it.” 

And Stiles smiles a little, and they kiss each other lightly before Derek pulls back and sighs. “But…we can’t just be it for each other. We can’t be everything to each other. I need…” and Derek chuckles self depricatingly. “I need a job, I need a life outside of you, I need a purpose,” Derek says, frowing, and Stiles nods. 

“Okay, so we get you that,” Stiles says, looking determined. “We find you a purpose. We find you a place, because Derek, I’m not losing you. I won’t,” Stiles says, and Derek leans into Stiles’ kiss.

And Stiles helps Derek make something more of himself, and when Derek admits that he wants to do good, he wants to be able to help, to be needed and give something to people, Stiles suggests that Derek become a deputy, and brings it up to his dad over dinner, and he agrees. 

And Derek finds more being a deputy. He makes friends, he goes out for drinks with them, he starts to hang out with Scott and Kira more too, he helps Stilinski catch bad guys, both human and supernatural, and he finds that purpose again. He starts to feel rounded again, whole. With Stiles by his side. 

And sometimes when Derek gets off shift, Stiles is outside waiting for him, leaning against his jeep, a smile on his face, and when he pushes off the car to greet Derek with a grin and a long, hard kiss, arms wrapped around Derek tightly, Derek has never felt happier. 

As many Sherlolly shippers out there, I was completely ecstatic over the multiple moments between the two in The Empty Hearse and, in the surge of the moment, was led to believe that “OMG OMG SHERLOCK LUVES MOLLY IT IS CANON MY BABIES MY SHIP HAS SAILED PRAISE THE LAWD!!!!”

Now, however, after rewatching their scenes for at least 30 times in the span of a few days, I have come to the conclusion that my previous thoughts were far too optimistic and blinded by the light of new content and material to be considered logical. Now, as I watch their scenes with a clearer head I can notice some things are in fact not what they may seem and have led me to become extremely skeptical that Sherlock’s new behavior towards Molly leans towards romantic, while still desperately holding on to that small hope that, in fact, it is.

Now, before anyone jumps on my ass, let me just mention that I am a complete Sherlolly fanatic. I have shipped it actively for quite a while now and I will ship it till my dying breath.

Secondly, I want you to know that I am an engineer. I am not a literary major, I don’t know how to write analyses, nor am I very good at picking up on things like how what someone’s wearing in the scene and how it affects them. I’m a logical person and I can only call it how I see it through these two eyes of mine. So I may be very incorrect about my assumptions in this meta, but for all intents and purposes, I think it’s not a bad thing for someone like me to give it a go, if only for others, who are better at this than I am, to compare their own theories with mine and perhaps reevaluate or rethink theirs under a new light.

Now, enough rambling from me, let’s get this show on the road.

Obviously, major spoilers for The Empty Hearse below, so thread with caution if you haven’t watched it yet, though who are we kidding, you probably have already. Also, all GIFs and Edits are mine and have not been stolen from anyone. 

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