and he's wearing his hat

gotta have music on while cleaning

I put this up on redbubble - available as t-shirts/stickers if anyone’s interested!!

vampire but from our era so he’s a surfer dudebro from cali who got bit while making out with a dude at a halloween party and his names brad he wears his hat backwards and says brah unironically

THE VERGIN:

  • Software engineer
  • Runs an anonymoose clone
  • Straight edge
  • Had a quiet childhood
  • Mundus doesn’t even know who he is
  • Killed one demon camera once with a throwing knife
  • Shot a pregnant demon in the back and womb from long distance with a sniper rifle
  • Broke up with his girlfriend and erased her memories of how much of a faggot he was
  • Wears a stupid hat
  • Can’t even transform his gay ass katana
  • Doppleganger style Devil Trigger is weak as shit until he becomes a true edgelord and makes his mom cry

THE CHADGE:

  • Fairground worker that doesn’t even give a shit about his job
  • Singlehandedly does all the dirty work for anonymoose cause he feels like it
  • Has never been sober once in his life
  • Was tormented and abused by a demon as a child, beheaded the bitch like an alpha
  • Mundus has been trying to murder him since he was born, has failed for over 20 years
  • Murders Bill O’Riley, Fox News, Mundus, a fat demon bitch, an invincible Hunter and a giant demon fetus
  • Has the moral high ground over Vergin because he beat the pregnant demon’s spawn head on
  • Cucks Vergin, grabs Kat’s ass, manages to convince strippers to fuck him for free
  • Doesn’t even know what a hat is
  • Rebellion transforms all the time based on how his power grows
  • Devil Trigger makes enemies explode just by looking at them, gets stronger based on fond memories of his mom

I just had a thought on Medieval fashion and knights, and it all lead to one historical character: Niccolo da Tolentino.

The man was an Italian condottiero, or a contractor, for one of the many condottieri companies operating in the fractured country made of city-states that was Italy in the 15th century. 

In 1432, while contracted by the Republic of Florence against the Republic of Siena under Francesco Piccinino, da Tolentino was said to have wanted to close in on the enemy, that he forgot to wear his helmet, meaning that we wore a civilians hat instead.

A civilian hat doesn’t really sound that impressive, is what you’re probably thinking. But you’re not thinking of ITALIAN MEDIEVAL civilian hats.

Look at that hat!!

Look at it!

okay hear me out: 

you know those photo series that are like “In The Running For The Next Spiderman/Young Han Solo/Bachelor/Prince Eric/Property Brother”

and it’s just like nine generically handsome brunet white men that might all be Henry Cavill or might all be Matt Bomer or might all be the photogenic runner guy from 2012 for all we know but it’s impossible to tell because they are just so generic?

and you know how nobody really remembers what Moist von Lipwig (slash Albert Spangler where applicable) actually looks like, they just remember the gold hat, or the glasses, or the bountiful ear hair?

what I want is an adaptation where Moist, whenever he’s being an anonymous face or The Man in the Golden Suit or Albert Spangler, is played by a series of generically handsome brunet white men who are swapped out shot-to-shot.

2

Luffy & Labrador

Robin & Whippet

(From @blenheims ’s lovely dog headcanons)

new overwatch event is actually a birthday party. there are streamers and balloons on every map. every hero gets a skin but its just their default with a party hat. mccree’s cigar is replaced with a party blower that goes off when he high noons and he wears the party hat on top of his cowboy hat. soldier’s rockets come with confetti. pharah’s rockets look like giant birthday candles. zenyatta gets a pinata skin and drops candy when he dies. the payload on every payload map is replaced by a giant cake and when it reaches the end reinhardt pops out of it wearing nothing but a giant bow over his junk.

  • Bruce: I am vengeance
  • Bruce: I am the night
  • Bruce: I am--
  • Bruce: *phone buzzes* *holds up finger* one sec
  • Criminal being strangled: Uhhh--
  • Bruce: *into phone* you remembered to put sunscreen in his bag, right?
  • Bruce: look I don't give a shit if he says he doesn't burn--
  • Bruce: Just make sure he wears his hat too--
  • Bruce: No, I'm on patrol.
  • Bruce: Yes, I'm busy, but sunscreen is import--okay.
  • Bruce: Okay, fine. Bye. *hangs up*
  • Bruce: *looks at criminal*
  • *awkward pause*
  • Bruce: You heard--
  • Criminal: *quickly* I didn't hear SHIT
Hogwarts Headcanons No One Asked For

Shiro

  • muggle born
    • his parents were very proud of their son
  • the sorting hat didn’t even stutter when it called out hufflepuff
  • has a black cat named Mittens
  • he made the quidditch team as chaser in his 3rd year
  • prefect by 5th year
  • quidditch captain in his 6th year
  • headboy in his 7th year
  • he was reveered as the schools golden boy by the teachers
  • the students knew that he and matt were party/prank central
  • after he graduate he became an auror, but after and unfortunate accident three years later
  • he returned to hogwarts as the new Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher
  • kinda wigged out by the fact he can see the thestrals so he avoids them at all costs

Lance

  • a born slytherin
  • his family are wizards going back for ages
  • ¼ veela
  • he has little grey rat named Sharknado 
    • Lance: people think sharks are all bad. but they’re not. that’s why i’ve subverted the genre with sharknado. if you want vicious go look at dolphins
  • he made the cut as a seeker in his 4th year
  • charming things to shift through the colors of the rainbow is just what he does (after he comes out he starts doing the bi flag)
  • a potions master
  • obsessed with mermaids and the great lake
  • he turned keith’s hair white for a prank and issued a school wide apology for how horrible it was
  • runs a club to advocate against shark culling

Keith, Hunk, Pidge, Allura, and Coran under the read more because this post is long.

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