and he's like are you ellen

it’s been 3 months since Carrie died. and i was thinking today, it’s sort of… it’s comforting to know that she was happy with her life. she was writing, publishing a new book. she was doing tv. she was doing movies. she was doing star wars again. like, you could see she was in a good place. she stole the spotlight during the promotion for tfa and she was going to do it again for tlj. she “shocked” everyone by announcing she had an affair with harrison ford 40 years ago, and she wrote a book on it. she didn’t give a fuck. she did campaign against trump and she told people to go fuck themselves; she congratulated a pregnant interviewer on the sex; she told ellen degeneres she was open to dating an oxford professor; she showed an interviewer the middle finger after he said anyone would look good sitting beside jabba the hutt; she joked about how other people’s opinions on her appearance hurt 3 of her feelings even tho she was hurt by it; she wanted to move to the uk bc she didn’t want to live in the same country as trump; she threw a birthday party at a hotel in italy at 2am and the cops showed up at 5am to stop the party; she was strong, and she was honest, and she was brave.

it’s comforting to know what a thrill her life was, and that she still lived it intensely. but it’s also so fucking unfair exactly because of that. it was too soon.

Writing gay romance between Jewish characters with two differing levels of observance

I’m writing (or, right now, more planning/outlining, with occasional writing of small scenes that I can’t get out of my head) a novel about two Jewish men who fall in love in a very Xtian, conservative town. The older of the two (late thirties) is more closeted, reclusive, and is somewhat separated from his Jewish identity as a result of a combination of assimilation and intermarriage further back in his family. The main character (mid-late twenties) on the other hand is very involved with his synagogue, works at a Hebrew summer camp, keeps shabbos, etc.

My issue is that I’m very observant (conservaform) and so is my family; I know a few folks who go to my synagogue who are “high holy day Jews”, or might also come for a wedding or bris or bar/bas mitzvah, but not many who are non-observant to the degree of this character (hasn’t set foot in synagogue since being a child, didn’t have a bar mitzvah, has a pair of somewhat observant grandparents and some cousins/etc who are observant, but most of his immediate family isn’t observant). So I’m not sure how to portray the secondary character without someone going “why not just write a Jewish guy in love with an Xtian guy” or something, because even if his relationship to Judaism and Jewish culture are somewhat distant, they’re still there. I’m also afraid that someone is going to say “why are you bashing Xtianity” about some of the subject matter (as someone who has lived in a small town, I have a decent bit of material from personal experience on Xtian antisemitism), but really the main point is that I want to portray two Jewish men loving each other.

I want to write this but don’t want goyim in particular to try to argue that I should have just made my MC’s romantic interest Xtian in the first place, because one main theme I want to explore, which I haven’t seen explored much in fiction, is being gay and Jewish. Specifically, one concept I had for the second character is how his being closeted comes largely from a place of being raised in a Xtian-secular household in a very Xtian town, and homophobia being very religiously where he lives, and so him sort of being reluctant to explore religion at all; but then seeing how the MC is Very Jewish and somewhat-openly gay, and feeling both nostalgic for the parts of his grandparents he sees in the MC (speaking Yiddish, cooking traditional Ashkenazic food), as well as longing to be as comfortable with both his sexuality and to have a relationship with G-d as the MC does.

I don’t know if this is a weirdly specific character/plot concept, but it just came to me I guess and it’s been at me long enough that I’ve started to try to outline writing it. I just want to see more gay fiction with religious, specifically Jewish, characters. Thanks for any advice you can give.

Thank you for submitting a question so close to my heart! Looks like I need to break this down into several parts: 

1. How to portray secular Jews as something distinct from Christians, secular or otherwise - this may not be as hard as you think it is because you’re Jewish and your factory settings, your defaults, your unexamined ideas, may already be different from the Christians around you. Like, I was in my 30’s before I found out that gentiles don’t do the chair dance. I thought everyone did that. Give The Upside of Unrequired by Becky Albertalli (review here) a read – her main character tells the audience that “we’re the kind of Jewish family who eats bacon” and religion itself isn’t really a presence in her life, but she still finds it meaningful that the boy she’s working with at her new job turns out to be a fellow Jew.

Other possible markers of secular Jewishness:

  • Finding Jewish representation/acknowledgment of our existence in fiction (or the Jewishness of celebrities) meaningful
  • Casual use of the most common Yiddishisms (maybe not entire curse phrases, but, like, using the word ‘kvetch’ in ordinary conversation)
  • General feeling of alienation or otherness around super overt displays of Christianity
  • Foods like matzo ball soup or latkes (for your Ashkie characters, anyway; this might be different for other subgroups of us.) 

In my new release Knit One, Girl Two, the main character Clara is a secular Jew and one of the details I used to illustrate that is that her first kiss involved sneaking off with another girl during a friend’s bar mitzvah reception. She also refers to her grandparents as Bubby and Zayde and has strong opinions about which Jewish foods she does and doesn’t like. She’s slightly awkward around the love interest’s higher level of observance, which is something secular Jews might feel out of self-consciousness—if the character cared. A secular Jewish person and a gentile person don’t approach an observant Jewish person’s observance in the same way. The gentile may misunderstand or have misconceptions; the Jewish person might feel self-conscious for not participating. Or feel nostalgic for observant people in their past (like “oh, my grandma used to –!”) 

2. How to portray your own marginalization without sounding like you’re bashing the privileged group. Now, you’re not really obligated to watch out for the feelings of a group that has hurt you by having power over you… but at the same time I 100% understand not wanting to step on toes just to save your own peace of mind. Some suggestions for this:

  • Having some of the Christians in the town be nice, but powerless to stop the jackwagon ones.
  • Flat-out having your character say “I’m not mad at Christianity; these people don’t even seem like they’re following Jesus in the first place”
  • Cut down on the more painful elements and focus on your main characters’ reactions to their hurt rather than describing the bigotry itself. That will cut down on how much your bigoted characters hurt your RL readers, so they’ll be mad at them for your main characters’ sake but not for their own sake and it’ll give them a little distance. (Example: “OMG, I can’t believe how much of a jerk Todd was being, saying all that garbage about Jews and gay people.” Instead of “Todd walked into the room and shouted that Jews are X and gay people are Y!”)
  • Try to cut down on having the most bigoted characters belong to groups marginalized along another axis. You’re going to perpetuate fatphobia if your most bigoted character is also your only fat character, and if I were reading this story I’d be uncomfortable if the homophobic/antisemitic characters were Black unless a Black author was writing it because from a white pen this could easily be read as blaming those two -phobias on Black people instead of white supremacy where it belongs. 

3. I don’t think you’re going to get “you might as well have made him Christian” coming from outsiders because you’re a Jewish person writing Jewish characters. Just speaking from personal experience.. In any case, a secular Jewish character is not a Christian character. Sometimes they can come off that way when gentiles write them, because they won’t know what kind of details to add to make their being Jewish not seem arbitrarily pasted on, but I doubt that would happen from a Jewish writer. 

4. “One main theme I want to explore, which I haven’t seen explored much in fiction, is being gay and Jewish.” 

I have several recommendations for you! 

First of all, Jordan S. Brock’s just come out with a m/m novel called Change of Address based on her own experiences with PTSD and a service dog—it’s even dedicated to the service dog. Like her, the love interest is a Jewish adoptee, and the character’s observance mirrors her own – he and his father don’t allow bacon in the house but they’ll eat pepperoni as long as it’s somewhere else, for example. 

Out of print but easy to find in libraries through ILL is The Dyke and the Dybbuk, Ellen Galford’s paranormal f/f comedy about a demon who possesses a Jewish lesbian cab driver and makes her get a crush on an Orthodox woman as a prank. (Review)  

I also collected this list of free queer Jewish SFF short stories, which includes nonbinary representation. As far as my own works go, I really tried to infuse the Tales from Perach collection with all the joy and gratefulness both Judaism, Jewishness, and queerness have brought to my life – there’s a lesbian’s grateful prayer of thanks for her relationship with her wife, an elderly trans woman and her husband attending services, and a royal family with two moms and two dads putting on an exceptionally lavish Purimspiel that includes a scripted swordfight. 

I’m glad you’re writing something to add to this and expand the body of LGBT Jewish literature, especially something where both members of the couple are Jewish.

–Shira

Best Friends (Part 9)

Summary: Meeting in college, you and Bucky strike up a friendship. And that is all there is, until Bucky realizes he’s in love with you. But it might just be a little too late for that.

Word Count: 612

Masterlist

A/N: I’M SCREECHING.

Originally posted by pxggycxrters

Your lips touched before you could react to what Bucky had just said. You were going to pull away, you were, but then Bucky moved his mouth against yours and you felt a surge of ‘right, why haven’t I done this before?’ and you kissed back.

It was like nothing you had experienced before. Bucky kissed you like you were the only woman he would ever kiss again. He held you close, his hands spreading across your back, arms warm around your frame. He swiped his tongue between your lips and you let him in without hesitation, feeling pleasure run through your body as he began to explore your mouth.

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  • Namjoon: ugh, i have a headache
  • Jackson: oh do you want some pain killers?
  • Namjoon: no i don't wanna forget i took one and overdose
  • Jackson: y'know that's good bc i knew a guy who overdosed
  • Jackson: and like, he ripped off his clothes and jumped in a fountain at the mall
  • Jackson: and screeched "BLIGH! I'M A KRAKEN FROM THE SEA!"
  • Namjoon: i heard that was you
  • Jackson: ....anyways nice seeing you
It’s A Comfort Thing

Author: @sincerelystiles
Pairing: Dylan x Reader
Word Count: 3,738

Warnings: nsfw aT ALL THIS IS SO SINFUL I’M NOT EVEN SORRY

A/N: i was gonna keep this fluffy, but we all know it’s pretty impossible for me to not write sin for dylan, so here you go!! also i apologise for how dirty this got. fUCK. and thanks to my bby @sabrinas-wolves for helping me with this and the puthey… and this is dylan pov

listen to this


Originally posted by arkhamcutie


my baby: text me when you’re on your way home so i can start dinner xo

dyl pickle: will do xx

I shove my phone back into my pocket with a smile and rub my hands together eagerly. It had been five months since I’d been home, which also meant five long, agonisingly lonely months since I last saw Y/N. Admittedly, I’d much rather be home with her right now, either fucking the shit out of her, or holding her close to my chest as I wash her hair in the bath tub. She always loved corny shit like that. But unfortunately, I wasn’t. I was in my dressing room, waiting with T-Pose to be interviewed with Ellen DeGeneres.

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Worth Keeping

Pairing: Dean x Reader

Tags: Fluff, smut, smut with feelings, biting kink (idk how that got in there)

Words: 3,326

A/N: It’s been too long and I apologize profusely, please take this as a peace offering :)) I reallly like this one :)

Originally posted by heytheredeann

Forever Tagging:  @kay-marie19,  @classicteenagenothing, @that1awkwardfangirl,  @thetalesofmooseandsquirrel,  @writingbeautifulmen, @immostlyconfused ,  @sii88, @feministcastiel, @iamflanneltrash, @wrapbuckyinablanket, @restricted-illusion,  @imtotallyaunicorn,  @chickenmcsade, @xtina2191,  @doctorcziken, @envydean, @itsoliviajohn,  @that1seniorchick, @sis-tafics, @ilovetardisblue,  @iwantthedean, @wibly-wobly-winchester,   @mrswhozeewhatsis, @drarina1737, @milkymilky-cocopuff, @ellen-reincarnated1967,  @a-sea-of-fandoms, @voidobsession,  @that1seniorchick, @purgatoan @rikkielovesmusic88 , @maddieburcham1 , @shippingismythang , @a-broken-hunter , @fangirlofeverythingme , @senselesssamii , @darquethoughts , @kris–ann– , @capislife123 , @katekitoka

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8

I know that Mary’s covering up her involvement with the British Men of Letters in this specific scene, but it does feel like her approach to hunting is different to John’s, and by extension Sam and Dean’s. She sets out to build networks and alliances with other hunters (which feels like it’s a more common approach?), whereas John burned bridges with Ellen and Bobby, two of the few other hunters he interacted with, and seems to have raised his sons with the expectation that they would hunt mostly by themselves. 

6

Whooo, it’s Friday Reads! My favorite moment of the week. I’m reading Neil Gaiman’s new Norse Mythology because I’m going to be doing an email Q&A with him next week – watch this space!

Mama Susan Stamberg is reading Ann Patchett’s Commonwealth.

Friend of the Desk Colin Dwyer is reading The Vegetarian, which he compares delightfully to Bartleby the Scrivener.

PCHH producer Jessica Reedy has Lillian Boxfish Takes a Walk.

Code Switch’s Karen Grigsby Bates reports, “I’ve been reading Kathleen Collins’ posthumously-published collection of interrelated short stories, Whatever Happened To Interracial Love?  She was a playwright and filmmaker as well as an author, and these stories unfold like little movies of their own.  And they’re a vision of black life that isn’t seen often enough.  Makes you wonder what she would have done if she’d lived longer. (She died at 46, of breast cancer.)”

And Boss Lady Ellen is reading Get Well Soon: History’s Worst Plagues and the Heroes Who Fought Them.

How about you?

– Petra

Bright And Warm

(Gif source: x)

Characters - Dean x Reader
Summary - Dean never was one for relationships. He always messed it all up one way or another, but just this once, he hopes he can do something right.
Word Count - 1,296
Warnings - Language, a handsy asshole, allusion to previous physical abuse
A/N - Part of @whispersandwhiskerburn’s 2k Follower Celebration. Prompt: “Must Be Doing Something Right” Billy Currington + “Yes. Anything, just… yes…” I slightly modified the dialogue prompt since I thought it worked a little better the way I used it. This is different than my other stuff, so let me know what you think!!


Dean never was one for relationships. Sooner or later the shit hit the fan, and he was left with what was left of his heart shattered whenever it fell to bits. It happened with Cassie, and it happened with Lisa. It happened every time he let himself believe that he could manage to not fuck up something good in his life. Someone good in his life.

Then he met you.

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Heat of the Moment - Part 2: Awakening

Characters: Reader (Y/N Padalecki), Jensen Ackles, Jared Padalecki,

Pairing: Jensen x reader, Jared/sister!Reader

Warnings: Smut, Oral (female receiving), Unsafe sex (wrap it before you tap it boys and girls), Angry Moose.   

Word count: 1500ish

A/N: Andi aka @ellen-reincarnated1967 offered to write me another drabble for a series of hers I love, so I told her to pick one of five prompts but my overactive brain made a story of all five prompts. This is part two of a two part story.

2 out of 5 prompts are used in this one and they are bolded if you are curious.

Thanks a billion to @teenage-internet-recluse and @mamapeterson for betaing this for me. You’re awesome girsl :D

MASTERPOST

You squeezed your eyes harder together to keep the sunbeams penetrating the curtains from stabbing your brain. Fuck, it felt as if a herd of rhinos had a dance party in there. You let out a soft moan, trying to move out of the offending sun’s passage and stick your head under the pillow like an ostrich. You instantly froze when you felt a foreign weight wrapped around your middle. 

“Shit!” you thought as you slowly moved to turn your head. The sight that met you, combined with the dull ache between your legs as you moved, made your breath catch in your throat. The man beside you was still asleep with a blissful expression on his face, while your head and heart was tearing your emotions in opposite directions.

What if he regretted this? Fuck he is beautiful. What if Jared find out? Would it be bad to lean in and kiss those pouty lips of his? Dammit Y/N, focus!  

Even if you had no immediate recollection of last night, there was no doubt in your mind what had happened. You were both naked and the delicious soreness between your legs served as a reminder of where the adonis next to you had been.

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Imagine Ellen setting you and Tom Up

Summery: Okay so in this imagine you are a pretty big actor who has made quite a few movies. You’re pretty famous and well known. A HUGE fan of Spiderman and Tom Holland, which Ellen knows. Little do you know that Tom is a huge fanboy of you as well. So, Ellen decided to play matchmaker and see if she can make her two guests fall in love.

 Key: (Y/N)= Your name (Y/L/N) = your last name (C/F/N)=Celebrity friend name (S/N) =Ship Name (O/C/F) =other celebrity friend __________________________________________ 


 You pace back and forth in your dressing room, trying your best to calm your nerves before going on live television. This isn’t he first time you will have been on television, but it is the first time you’ll be on the Ellen show. You had met Ellen at the last Emmy awards and you two had gotten along quite well, even becoming friends. The blonde invited you to be on the show after she saw the trailer for your latest film “Falling For a Lost Cause” about making the most out of life and love. It was kind of ironic how you played in a dramatic love story and yet had nobody for yourself to love. Well, romantically that is. Unless you count your obsession over Tom Holland. 

You had been a huge Spiderman fan ever since you were younger when you used to steal your brother’s comic books, and now that they’d come out with another reboot of the movie, you could honestly say you were in love. Toby and Andrew had also taken a toll on you as you spent countless night dreaming about them, but when Tom Holland was announced as the new web slinging hero, you fell head over heels. It may have been due to the fact that he was closer in age than the other two, or maybe it was the way his chocolate brown orbs could make you melt. 

 You had almost met him once. You were invited to the Doctor Strange premiere and saw the man of your dreams doing an interview, being his nerdy self. When your close friend (C/F/N) finally pushed you to talk to him (and I literally mean she shoved you into him) you bumped into him rather hard and stumbled, losing your footing and pulling Tom down with you while others froze, watching the embarrassing ordeal. Immediately you began spitting out apologies, stumbling over your words and turning a bright shade of red to match the shade you were pretty sure matched Tom’s as people helped you to your feet. As you stood up, Tom said nothing as he stared at you, frozen and making you more embarrassed. You remember thinking ‘oh god, he hates me’ before literally running away. 

 You booked it down the red carpet, going past interviews and other celebrities before you hid behind your other friend (O/C/F), the whole night making sure that you wouldn’t see Tom Holland again. 

 The next morning your twitter feed was filled with clips of the embarrassing night before. As well as the many people commenting (S/N) anywhere they could. You shake your head as you recall the embarrassing memory from over 6 months ago, stopping your pacing and plopping down on the couch, smoothing out the white robe you had on that you’d be removing to change into the black dress hanging up. 

 Deciding to kill time and get your mind off things, you change into the tight long sleeve black dress and your black strap on heels when you hear a knock on the door. As you put in your right earring, grabbing your left, you head to the door. 

 Curiously, you turn the handle and peer out to see who you recognized as Andy, with a headset on and an embarrassed look on his face. “Oh hey,” you smiled, putting in your other earring as you opened you door further, now seeing a camera crew behind the average man. “Uh hey to you too?” you said to the cameras suspiciously. “Andy right?” you asked as you shook the man’s hand. He nodded “yep, and you’re (Y/N) (Y/L/N) right?” he asked sarcastically. You laughed slightly, “Yuppo, that’s me,” you say in a slightly off voice and immediately scolding yourself mentally or your weirdness afterwords. 

 Andy however, laughs and you cringe, “Sorry I don’t know why I did that,” you giggle, “That was weird.” you laugh with Andy as he shakes his head, “No, you’re fine. Ellen just wants a word with you before the show.” he explains and you nod suspiciously, “a word with me?” you ask and Andy nods, “And a camera crew?” you ask, knowing Ellen is planning something. “She wants to document it, for memories.” he says not convincing you in the least. “Uh huh,” you nod suspiciously as Andy begins walking away.

 "Should I be scared?“ You ask the camera, to which the man holding it only smiles, "Come on man,” you laugh, following Andy, “Give me a hint,” you whisper shout making the cameraman smile once more, “Ugh you are no help.” you groan, trudging after Andy down a few halls. 

 Stopping, you take off your heels to ease the pain in the balls of your feet, running to catch up with Andy as he stops in front of a room. “Is this the part where you murder me?” you joke as Andy stays straight faced, answering by opening the door. “Andy?” you ask, a chill going up your spine, as you step into the room. “Are you actually going to murder me?” you ask, your smile dropping as Andy closes the door suddenly, trapping you inside. Your eyes widen as you rush to the door, hitting the wood “Andy!” you exclaim, hearing nobody on the other side. 

 You groan turning around sliding down the door. “Ugh,” you say, before seeing a camera on the far wall. Suddenly your blood runs cold, “Ellen if you scare me I swear I’ll die!” you warn, standing up and pacing the room, stopping before another hidden camera. “I’m genuinely afraid right now,” you laugh slightly before you hear the door open behind you. 

 You almost turn around before you hear a voice you recognize, “Wait in there?” the British accent speaks, and you freeze, immedietly knowing who it is. “Nah mate, I feel like she’s gonna jump out at me.” Tom speaks once more and you almost laugh as you hear his footsteps stumble into the room and hear the door slam once more. You glare at the camera in front of you, shaking your head angrily at Ellen who was most likely watching. Then you heard Tom speak again, “Uh, miss?” he spoke uncertainly and you made a face, not wanting to address him and have him remember you. “Do you know why I’m in here?” he asks, his voice getting closer. You turn around slowly, eyes trained on the floor as you try not to make eye contact, “I know about as much as you do,” you sigh, finally making yourself look up at Tom. Oh God, why did he have to look so good. His hair was slicked and he was wearing a t-shirt and Denim jeans. He probably hadn’t changed for the show yet.

 You had no idea he would be on the show today, if you did you would have been a lot more nervous. As you studied him, you noticed that he froze, his eyes trained on you as he stood tense, a light pink dusting his features. He probably was remembering the last time you saw him, when you completely embarrassed him. 

 You smiled shyly as he broke out into a huge grin, his mouth hanging open, “Y-you’re (Y/N) (Y/L/N)!” he exclaimed, his arms making a huge gesture. You furrowed your brows as he stared at you, “Yeah?” you said uncertainly as Tom exploded with energy, pacing around the room with his hands messing up his hair excitedly, the smile never leaving his face, “O-oh my God!” he exclaimed, “I am just such a huge fan.” he explained, coming up and grabbing your hand to shake it quite quickly, “I love you in (M/T) and (O/M/T) just,” he sighed, reminiscing, “Absolutely amazing!” he explained, going on and about you and how much of a fan he was. 

 To say you were shocked would be an understatement. This man you were practically in love with, whom you thought hated you, was a complete fanboy! Finally, not being able to stay silent anymore, you exploded, “Me? You like me?” you asked in astonishment, your eyes wide as you stared him up and down, “I am like your biggest fan!” you exclaimed, “Y-you’re just so talented and funny.” you went on, “I cried when I watched the impossible, and I NEVER cry…besides Disney movies…” you mumble as you continued to compliment Tom and his work. 

 He stood there starstruck until you finally said, “and I thought you hated me after I embarrassed you on the red carpet,” to which Tom furrowed his brows, “What? no!” he disagreed, “Yeah!” you exclaim, “I mean, I pulled you to the ground in front of millions of viewers and to be fair you didn’t even say a word to me–" 

 "That’s because I was star struck!” he interrupts, “and you ran off before I could introduce myself. I found it quite funny actually,” he laughed with you, “Ugh. Well you know me, trying to avoid embarrassing encounters only by making them more awkward,” you face palmed. Tom laughed mumbling something under his breath you couldn’t quite make out. 

“Oh and don’t even get me started on Spiderman,” you exclaim as Tom’s head shoots up, “I mean, I love him so much it’s not even funny.” you laugh as Tom smiles widely, “No way, YOU love Spiderman?” he asks you and you nod obviously, giving him a “duh” face. “I love Spiderman too!” he exclaims, “What are the odds?” he says sarcastically as you laugh with him. 

 Finally your laughter dies down and you realize you were still trapped in this room, and the show should start in 20 minutes. “How are we gonna get out?” you say suddenly, both of your eyes widening.

Just then, you hear a voice all too familiar on the com on the right side of the room, “I’ll let you out if you kiss,” Ellen’s voice breaks through, causing your eyes to widen and face to turn to a shade resembling a tomato. 

You hear her snickers before the com cuts off and you cough awkwardly, not even daring to spare Tom a glance, “Come on Ellen,” You groan, giving Tom an awkward smile, in which he returns shyly.

After what seems like forever, but was most likely just a few minutes, Tom’s stomach growls, causing you to laugh and gasp, “Ellen, we got a starving boy in here!” You exclaim as Tom begins to laugh, “What kind of monster traps someone in a room with no food!” You laugh with Tom as he kicks the ground with his foot.

About ten seconds later, a box slides under the small space under the door. Immediately, you rush to the box, pulling it out the rest of the way and jumping with glee.

Tom walks over curiously, “What is it?” He asks before I open the box, smiling even wider before I answer, “The cure to everything,” I sigh, “Aka, pizza.” I laugh as Tom groans teasingly, “I call first slice,” You declare, pulling out a slice and shoving it into your mouth. 

You look over at Tom who’s eyes are wide with shock, “What?” You ask though a mouthful of cheesy goodness, “We’re trapped in here and you’re worried about getting the first slice?” He asks astonished. You glare at him teasingly, “You got something against pizza?” You ask as Tom immedietly widens his chocolate orbs and raises his hands in defense, “I didn’t say that,”  he declares as you level a playful glare at him, “Good, I almost had to kill you for a second.” Tom giggled, actually giggled, “Well, we can’t have that now can we?” he laughs and you laugh with him, handing him the pizza box as he takes out a slice. 

The two of you sit there in silence, eating pizza and sharing awkward glances, both resulting in blushing and looking down at the floor.

“The show starts in 15 minutes and I haven’t even gone to wardrobe,” he throws his head back and groans once more. You laugh at him, “After eating this greasy goodness, I need to get my makeup redone.” You sigh, “Guess we’re both in trouble,”

Tom mumbles something under his breath you can’t quite make out as you turn to him curiously, “What?” You ask and Tom looks at you in embarrassment, as if he was hoping you didn’t hear him. “S-sorry, no it was stupid…forget it.” he said too quickly, his eyes darting back to the floor.

You furrowed your brows, “No, I didn’t hear you, what was it?” you asked, genuinely curious as Tom looked up from the floor at you shyly, a pink dusting his cheeks, “I…er,” he mumbled, rubbing the back of his neck nervously, making you smile at his shyness, “I, um, I said maybe we should just do it…” he trailed off as you smiled at him, your cheeks turning bright red. 

“You mean kiss?” You ask, immedietly getting nervous and twiddling your thumbs. “Yeah…” Tom said, now seeming certain and determined as his eyes bore into mine. 

“I-I mean unless you don’t want to we could just–” You interrupt him, placing your right hand on the back of his neck and pulling his face towards yours to press your lips onto his. 

As soon as your tender flesh meets, Tom’s hand goes to your waist, pulling you impossibly close as your hand goes up to mess with his dark curls which were so much softer than you’d imagined.

The kiss was hungry and passionate and needy. neither of you wanted to break away as the door opened.

Finally you forced yourself to pull your lips from his, out of breath as Tom smiled at you slightly, his eyes wide, “Tastes like pizza,” he mumbles before Ellen and a camera crew come barging in, the blonde laughing hysterically, her face red as she stares at the two of you in shock, with mischief in her eye.

You had no time to be embarrassed as the crew dragged you and Tom away to your wardrobes where hair and makeup were waiting for you.

As they dolled you up, fixed your hair and rearranged your outfit, you sat in shock, not believing what just happened. You just kissed your celebrity crush, and he kissed you back. 

You touched your lips chastely as you recalled his lips that were once there, on yours…

______________________________________

A/N: Part two will be what happens when the show actually starts and Ellen shows the audience your guys’ footage. It may even lead to a relationship.


Originally posted by poptartcalum

Originally posted by degeneresellen

So let’s talk about Bi Steve Rogers.
  • He’s always been casually bi
  • Always been pretty obvious about it by media standards but The Straights™ never noticed
  • The lgbt+ community all took notice but didn’t wanna say anything in case the first avenger was actually really homophobic and would get mad
  • Then one of those shitty homophobic news stations starts talking about the rumours and how they are ridiculous because Steve is an American hero and knows traditional values and all that jazz
  • When he hears about this he decides he wants to come out
  • He researches ways to come out but all the tips he finds are for small scale situations
  • While searching he comes across dates for nyc pride
  • He calls Natasha to tell her
  • She totally supports him but warns him of media backlash and being careful and all that stuff
  • And so, a few weeks later Steve is getting ready to go to his first pride parade
  • He painted over his eyes with the bi pride colors and wore a t-shirt of his shield with a bi color pallette that he found online
  • When he gets there he immediately starts smiling??? Like, he can’t stop grinning??     
  • At first no one notices it’s him because face paint and huge crowds
  • But then he finds a group of people waving bi flags around on a float and walks over
  • He starts talking to one of the girls walking next to it and about 30 seconds into their conversation she realises she’s talking to Captain America and has a mini heart attack
  • She wanted to make sure so she quietly asks his name and he happily tells her his full name
  • She almost screams but instead thanks him for everything he’s done and asks him why he’s here
  • “Well, I’m bisexual and I saw some guy on the tv talking about how there’s no way I like boys because I know ‘traditional values’ or something like that, so I decided to come to pride. Just to prove them wrong.”
  • She asks if he wants to talk to the group leader about making an announcement and he very excitedly says yes
  • She brings a man with his hair dyed blue, pink, and purple and a flag tied around his shoulders over and he gasps before going to shake Steve’s hand
  • The man brings Steve up onto the float and hands him a megaphone
  • They check around for cameras near them and once they were sure that someone would get it on camera Steve started talking
  • He basically just said he was bi as hell and loved girls AND boys, along with a little undertone of “fuck the media and it’s heteronormativity” mixed in
  • The news goes crazy within half an hour
  • When Steve gets back home he immediately contacts the news outlet that caused this whole debacle and asked if they would have him on the show
  • Obviously they said yes because who says no to a war hero
  • They try to keep the interview on the topic of his achievements but he keeps bringing up people he hooked up with during that time period
  • The first one he talked about was a girl so they were relieved
  • Most people thought the video from pride was a hoax and it was just someone claiming to be Steve and hum talking about a girl made the interviewer feel like it really was a hoax
  • But then he starts talking about the time him and Howard Stark made out in the back room of his lab and laughing about it
  • That’s when the interviewer decided to just ask him outright whether he really was in that video
  • “Yeah, that was me. Of course it was.”
  • The interviewer is baffled and mildly offended
  • “Why would you do something like that?” He asked in a way that made it seem like some huge scandal
  • “I saw someone on the news, this channel to be exact, try to disprove rumors about me being gay. Which I’m not, by the way, so at least you were half right. I’m bisexual. That means I’m attracted to both men and women.”
  • “That’s not possible.”
  • “Sure it is! It’s stars and stripes, not one or the other isn’t it?”
  • The internet has a fit
  • The lgbt+ community has never felt more alive honestly
  • Steve goes to every pride he can and talks to younger kids
  • He went on Ellen and talked about his experiences as a bisexual man in the 40’s
  • Mostly he just said he spent most of his younger years either fighting someone or crushing on someone
  • On the twitter account Tony helped him make he constantly tries his best to help out anyone who is feeling unsafe or unsure about their identity
  • Donates to lgbt+ charities
  • Probably starts a group that helps lgbt+ kids who have no place to stay by building group homes that have materials/resources specifically for them
  • So many bi jokes
  • Like any bi pun you could possibly think of he has made
  • Really helped a lot of people feel better and learn to accept themselves/others because of his openness and sheer willpower
  • Just, bi Steve Rogers being a pure force in the universe
  • Lou Ellen: We each need to pick someone from the original team, and perform their role in the group! We can be exactly like them... but better!
  • Will: That... sort of makes sense.
  • Lou Ellen: I call Annabeth! I'm obviously best suited to being the boss.
  • Cecil: You are very bossy.
  • Lou Ellen (voice breaking): Thank you.
  • Will: Then I'll do what Grover does!
  • Lou Ellen: Cecil, you can be Percy.
  • Cecil: Which one is he?
  • [Lou Ellen makes a disgusted face]
  • Cecil: I'm joking.
  • Lou Ellen: Great! You're already in character!
Never Have I Ever - Part 2

Pairing: Sebastian Stan x female reader 
Summary: Being interviewed by the most famous talk show host was totally new for you, and like always Ellen did her reputation justice, making you reveal something to the audience especially Sebastian seems to like.
Warning: smut, obviously ;) fingering, vaginal.. I’m bad at this

Part 1

Can anyone find the Hannah Montana related part? ;) 
Also, does anyone know where this gif is from?!?!?!

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Eye Of The Hurricane

Originally posted by sensitivehandsomeactionman

Characters- Dean x Reader

Warnings- fluffy sweetness

Word Count- 853

Summary- Your life was a whirlwind, yet you find a calm in the middle of your storm.

A/N- I wrote this at 2am and it just- it felt good. It was a practice in using no dialogue, and it’s really freeing not having to worry over that. A nice change of pace.


A hurricane. That’s what your life had always been. It was a whirlwind of people, places and monsters. A nomad all your life, you’d come to embrace the craziness of your life. It was the still, quiet moments that you never knew what to do with. Prior to Dean Winchester, you’d never had them.

The first time was after a bad hunt. Dean had thrown himself in front of you, taking the brunt of a werewolf attack. Sam shot it shortly afterward, but Dean was left bloody on the floor. There was so much blood. You knew how to handle this. Blood and pain you knew. The way Dean watched you though- you didn’t know what to do with that.

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One Word

Pairing: Dean x Reader

Tags: Smut, slight daddy kink, slight dirty talk

Words: 1639

Note: Shameless smut, pretty much Porn Without Plot.

Originally posted by hunterchesters

Tags: @mrswhozeewhatsis, @drarina1737, @voidobsession, @milkymilky-cocopuff, @ellen-reincarnated1967, @ilostmyshoe-79, @kittenofdoomage, @onlygodcanjudgeme-sh, @charliebradbury1104, @cici0507, @muchamusedaboutnothing, @thing-you-do-with-that-thing, @thelittleredwhocould, @castieltrash1, @theoneandonlysaucymo, @meeshw777, @professional-pandagirl

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I feel like a lot of the public has this mentality that like, any celebrity who hasn’t come out publicly and supports or positively references LGBT issues and things can’t possibly be gay themselves because wouldn’t that be too obvious????

And it’s like, nope. They could still be gay.

And it’s okay to maybe think those kind of gestures mean something…

Canadian Boys l Shawn Mendes Imagine.

prompt: Shawn & (y/n) managed to go from ‘dream couple’ to a messy relationship in front of the cameras, and Shawn doesn’t seem to accept that his ex has decided to move on with the one and only, Justin Bieber.

Originally posted by ladycucciola

Shawn could feel his cheeks heating up as Ellen started a game of Who’d You Rather.

“Rihanna or Sophia Bush?” Ellen asked and pictures of both women appeared on the screen behind him.

“Sophia Bush, no doubt.” he said confidently.

“Hmm, looks like you had your mind already done,” she teased him. “Okay, Sophia Bush or Kendall Jenner?”

“Sophia Bush.” he answered with a hint of laughter on his voice.

“Wow, you’re very sure of yourself.” Ellen said and he shrugged. “Sophia Bush or Margot Robbie?”

“Oh, no! You can’t do that!” he said making the audience laugh. “Ugh, Margot Robbie.” he answered and the audience ooh-ed.

“Margot Robbie or Camila Cabello?” Ellen asked and Shawn shook his head.

“Camila is a friend, so…” he started but the host interrupted him.

“She sure is,” Ellen said, earning laughs from the audience. “So, Camila or…”

“You didn’t let me finish!” Shawn complained laughing.

“It doesn’t matter, it’s my show,” Ellen joked. “Camila Cabello or (y/n) (y/l/n)?”

Shawn felt his cheeks heating up profusely. “They both are very good friends…”

“Oh, is there something you aren’t telling me, Shawn?” Ellen asked.

“No! Of course no.”

“Then answer the question.” Ellen said smiling and looking to the screen where there was Camila and you.

Shawn bit the inside of his cheek. “(y/n), she’s amazing.” he answered and everyone seemed happy with his answer.

“Then I guess we have a winner!” Ellen announced as another picture of you filled the large screen. “Shawn Mendes everybody!”


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Never Have I Ever - Part 3

Pairing: Sebastian Stan x female reader
Summary: Being interviewed by the most famous talk show host was totally new for you, and like always Ellen did her reputation justice, making you reveal something to the audience especially Sebastian seems to like.
Warning: fluff, smut, fingering, PDA

Part 1 / Part 2 (Smut in Part 2)

Keep reading