and he tries to help as many people as he can

Here’s the thing for me. About those scenes with Merle and “John.”

At the start, I couldn’t help but feel a little annoyed that Clint wasn’t asking different questions. Travis clearly had the same thoughts I did–tactically, Merle was playing it poorly. He gave more information than he needed and asked vague questions that didn’t yield practical intel on how to fight the Hunger. 

If it had been Taako, he’d have asked clever questions and been focused on getting info out of the Hunger, on besting it. If it had been Magnus, he would have straight up asked, “how do we kill you” and likely learned at least something from that. But this wasn’t Taako’s or Magnus’s role to play. 

Merle was approaching parley the way it was meant to be approached. Not as a warrior looking for a way to kill the Hunger, but as a diplomat trying to understand it. He approached it with an open mind. To the point where he was eventually able to ask “are you my friend?” 

He asked that of this nightmare entity, this thing that’s caused so much death and suffering–that’s killed him dozens of times. Maybe he’s just that able to open his heart. Or maybe despite the religious ideals he tries to project as a cleric, he’s someone who–whether the person in question is a human, or a god, or a sinister consuming force—just wants people to like him. 

Whatever the reason, he was able to look at the Hunger and try to reason with it. To talk to it earnestly about the value of life, and hope.

It didn’t listen. And when it didn’t listen, I actually believe Merle was disappointed. That for a moment he had hoped the Hunger could be better. Instead, he told the Hunger off, and said he didn’t want to see him anymore. 

And the Hunger is sad. For the first time in who even can guess how long, the Hunger feels sorrow, and regret. Because for a moment he had a friend, and then he lost that friend. Because of his own actions.

Merle didn’t learn how to kill the Hunger, he didn’t learn any information that could help them slow it down or get to the Light of Creation faster. But what he did hurt it more than any weapon ever could. 

I see your Frat Boy Vitya headcanons and I raise you:

Yuuri Katsuki being dragged to his first frat party after line three years at college spent just trying to blend into whatever wall is nearest. This is never going to happen and Yuuri thinks it’s because everyone is just amazed at how little of his shit he has together.

(They aren’t. “Fucking LOOK at him,” sighs many a sexually frustrated undergrad while pining loudly in Yuuri’s direction. Yuuri scuttles away with his hood closed almost completely around his face.)

Yuuri arrives at the party and immediately finds The Dog.

“There’s a dog here,” he tells Phichit, and spends the next three hours sitting on the floor with the dog.

“How are you?” he asks the dog very seriously as the dog slowly licks his shoulder. This is a Premium Dog. “Yes, good. Is my shoulder tasty? I’m so glad. I’m so glad you find my shoulder tasty. Whose dog are you?” The dog’s tags are in Cyrillic, which is really weird. Yuuri squints at the tag and finally says, “Whoever Binktop is, he has a really good dog.”

“Makkachin,” someone says eventually, and the dog gets up and goes to the interloper. 

“No, come back,” Yuuri whimpers as the dog leaves. He doesn’t go far–the guy who called him is standing on the edge of he crowd wearing Chinos and Gucci sunglasses.

They’re inside. At night.

“Are you Binktop?” Yuuri asks him blearily. People have been bringing him drinks the whole time he’s been sitting with the dog and he doesn’t know what that’s about. Probably they feel sorry for him.

(”I brought him a drink, Chad,” says a certain dejected brother of Iota Sigma Upsilon. “He took it but he looked like he was going to cry. All he said was I don’t need your pity. I don’t understand?”)

“Excuse me?” asks Binktop. There is some sort of expensive imported cider in his hand. He looks down at his dog as though he will know the answer.

Yuuri points at the dog’s tags. “Binktop. His owner.”

“Oh,” says Binktop. He bends down to show Yuuri that, on the backside of the tag he’d been looking at, the same information is listed in English. “No. Viktor.”

Yuuri frowns and squints. “You look more like a Binktop to me.” He holds out a hand for Makkachin the Dog and waits until he comes to sniff it. “You have a really good dog, Binktop. He’s a great dog.”

“You’re that figure skater, right?” Binktop asks, crouching down next to his dog. “Yuuri Katsuki?”

“Yes,” Yuuri sighs dejectedly. “That’s me.”

“Sick,” Binktop says.

“Yes, I am,” Yuuri says. “Do you have a bathroom, Binktop?”

He and Binktop spend half the night on the floor of the president of Iota Sigma Upsilon’s en-suite bathroom. Yuuri doesn’t know why Binktop chose to bring him to this bathroom, but it’s the one they’re in. Binktop doesn’t really seem interested in leaving, either. He holds Yuuri’s hair for him and listens to him talk about his family. Makkachin the Really Good Dog is there.

“It would probably be a good idea if you stayed here tonight,” Binktop says slowly after several hours of this. Yuuri stopped puking a awhile ago, thankfully. “I don’t know who you came here with, or where you live. I don’t think you do either.”

“Okay, I’m just gonna–” Yuuri climbs into the shower and curls up at the bottom. “This is good. I’m gonna sleep here, okay Binktop?”

“You could–I mean, if you want–my bed is softer.”

Yuuri glares at Binktop over his shoulder.

“No! I swear, no funny business. I’ll crash in Chris’ room. Or Micky or–someone, I promise.”

“Hmm. Okay.”

Binktop helps Yuuri get into bed and leaves a bucket next to him and makes him drink a glass of water. When he tries to take Makkachin with him, Yuuri tosses the covers back and says, “The good boy stays,” and Makkachin hops up. Binktop looks at Yuuri like he’s stolen something from him. The dog, probably.

(”I’m in love,” Viktor says to Chris later that night, swooning on Chris’ floor. “He stole my heart, right there!”)

Yuuri finds out later that Binktop is, in fact, Viktor Nikiforov. Viktor Nikiforov whose parents are major benefactors to the university. The gym where Yuuri trains is called the Nikiforov Intramural Sports Complex.

Viktor Nikiforov is the president of Iota Sigma Upsilon.

“Oh shit,” Yuuri whispers to himself.

“Do you want to go to breakfast?” Viktor Nikiforov asks him, looking a little less douchy in the light of day. Now that he’s not dressed up for a party, he’s wearing normal-person clothes, jeans and a university sweatshirt. His hair is ungelled and he looks nice and handsome. “I’ll walk you home first so you can change.”

“Okay,” Yuuri says softly.

Yuuri goes to breakfast with Viktor Nikiforov and then goes back to the Iota Sigma Upsilon house, where Viktor skillfully eats him out and announces that he intends to become Yuuri’s boyfriend.

The brothers of Iota Sigma Upsilon hoot and holler at Yuuri and Viktor’s wedding when Chris gets up with a microphone and says, “Let me tell you about how Yuuri and Viktor met! It started with a party and a dog…”

Tips On How to Write a Shape-Shifting Character (For both fanfic writers and original content writers)

(gif courtesy of http://ilyone.tumblr.com/)

HOLY SHIT MY LAST POST ABOUT WRITING  WINGED CHARACTERS (which you can find here) GOT A SHIT TON OF NOTES! SO I DECIDED TO MAKE ANOTHER ONE ON SHAPE-SHIFTERS!

There are a lot of shape-shifting fics and stories out there. Like. A lot. Whether they be about were-creatures or about characters that just have the ability to shape-shift, a lot of the times- like with winged characters- these shape-shifters are not written very well.

They may be unoriginal, or they may be super Mary-Sues/Gary Stus when it comes to the fact that they have an infinite amount of power or whatever. So I decided to tackle the issues that come with creating a shape-shifting OC or making a canon character into a shape-shifter.

1. Decide what your character’s shape-shifting will be mainly used for

Shape-shifting can be used for a variety of reasons, and that’s why it’s critical for you to figure out what your shape-shifter will mostly be using their powers for.

Here are some reasons why shape-shifters can use their powers:

-Battle (transforming into a bigger creature to overpower enemies)

-Disguise (transforming into something that blends in with the environment around them to hide from enemies)

-Forced to shift (AKA werewolves)

-Spy work (transforming into antagonist’s lackeys to infiltrate the base or even vice versa)

2. Set Limits Right Off the Bat

Shape-shifters are incredibly powerful, and in theory, they can be practically invincible when it comes to battle and hiding from enemies.

However, that should ONLY be in theory. Your shape-shifters CANNOT be all-powerful like their abilities can call for them to be. Here’s where Mary Sue/Gary Stu elements come in, because many writers just state that their characters can shape-shift and leave it at that.

That brings up questions like:

“If he was running from the Big Bad™, then why didn’t he just shift into a wall or a chair and disguise himself?”

“If she had to fight the Big Bad™, why didn’t she just transform into a dragon and deep fry him?”

“Couldn’t they just masquerade as the Big Bad™’s minions and get inside the secret lair?”

Then, the author tries to make up for the lack of rules by giving us some half-assed explanation halfway through the third book.

As soon as the reader finds out that the main character is a shape-shifter, you have to lay down the groundwork for the limits.

Can they only transform into animals?

Can they only transform a certain amount of times at any given point?

Is there something that distinguishes them from the object/person/animal that they’ve transformed into?

Can they only transform into inanimate objects?

Can they only transform into other people?

Does transforming take a lot of energy and therefore they don’t do it often?

Is transforming painful?

Take Beast Boy from Young Justice/ Teen Titans/ various other things as an example:

He can transform into a lot of animals, yes, but they’re all obviously green and unnatural, making it difficult for him to blend in with other animals. his means that his shapeshifting would be most used for attack than for disguise.

You need to set limits, or else your character will be all-powerful and the plot won’t be all that intriguing to the readers; they know that the protagonist will win, so they won’t bother to really get invested in the story.

3. There are many forms of shape-shifters. Just because the mainstream media is all about werewolves with sixteen packs that can cut glass doesn’t mean that you have to make werewolves only

Did you know that technically, a werewolf is just a subdivision of were-creatures?

The prefix “were/wer” means “man” and is usually followed by the name of an animal, ANY animal, to imply that the man (or woman) is transforming into it.

Therefore, there could be werecats, weretigers, werelions, wereunicorns, and were[insert plural name of creature here].

You should really look up the different kinds of shifters from all different cultures and regions of the world. They’re actually quite amazing!

Here’s a list of some of my favorite shapeshifter creatures (Note that these are not all of the shapeshifters, just my personal favorites some of which I feel needed to be represented more in literature):

-Were[insert name of big cat here]

-Werewolf

-Skinwalkers

-Animaguses(Animagi?) (don’t use these they’re JK Rowling’s I just really like Animagi)

-Generic, run-of-the-mill shapeshifters

-Were creatures that are actually just the creature trying to masquerade as a human/ a creature that has a human form

-Transforming into huge gruesome monsters (it’s good shit 10/10)

4. You don’t have to describe the full transformation every single time. The first time is enough.

Readers don’t want to have to go through long, agonizing paragraphs of description every time your character changes, especially if they change during a battle. They don’t want the bloody, gory action to be disrupted by a description of a transformation that they’ve read a hundred times before.

If you truly want to describe the transformation more than once, though I highly advise against it, never describe it more than three times, and make sure to make it unique every single time. If you don’t think you can do that, just describe it once.

You should, however, describe the symptoms that come with transforming. Is it painful? Is it uncomfortable? Does it feel incredible because it makes the character feel a rush of power? Gimme the deets, but not all of them.

Things that happen during transformation that you can describe:


Painful

- Fur/scales growing (stinging and itchy)

- Bones breaking and reorganizing, as well as new ones appearing and old ones transforming

- Muscles ripping and elongating/shrinking

- Fingernails/toenails turning into claws


Invigorating

- Heightened sense of sight/smell/hearing

- Adrenaline rush

- More power/strength/speed



Hope this helped!

No, Wait, You Got it All Wrong

You know what there’s not enough of? Canon compliant future fic where Stiles is a cop and he runs into Derek again. What’s that you say? There’s a ton of that?? Yes, true, but NOT ENOUGH.

“…. so then he says, ‘No, Officer, I swear to God this is the first time I’ve ever smoked up! I’ve never been in trouble with the law in my life! And I say, Billy, my man, you’ve been in trouble with me personally twice this month.” Stiles snorts at the memory. “Kid was so fucking high.”

Amanda must be halfway past tipsy, because she laughs uproariously into her beer at the mediocre punchline.

Stiles smiles. He’s satisfied with her reaction, with the warm murmur of the bar, with the buzz he’s got going… with just about everything, actually. After tonight, he’s looking at two full days off before he’s back on the beat, and the night’s still young. He leans back in his chair and takes a pull of his beer, savoring it.

Amanda glances towards the bar, probably considering a fourth round, and then visibly perks up as something near the front catches her eye.

“Oooh, Stiles,” she croons. “Look over at the door, like, just glance over.” She’s adjusted her gaze down at the table now, faking casual disinterest. Badly.

Stiles raises his eyebrows at her.

“This dude just walked in, he’s so your type,” she hisses. “C’mon, look! I’m telling you, six feet two inches of ‘yes, please, give it to me’ muscles, with some salt-and-pepper scruff icing. Unff.”

“Eh,” Stiles says, tipping his weight forward to hunch over the table. It’s not that he isn’t interested, exactly, but this is a cop bar and he doesn’t want to shit where he eats. Metaphorically.

“No, really,” Amanda insists. “He's… oh my God, he’s looking over here. He’s looking at you. Oh my God, Stiles, he’s coming over here!”

“No, he isn’t,” Stiles scoffs. He’s filled out a bit from high school and he’s finally competent at styling his hair, but he’s not that hot. Only Amanda’s sitting straight like a rod, eyes fixed on a point behind him that’s about where a six foot two man’s eyes would be.

“Stiles?”

He turns then, shooting to his feet before his brain’s quite caught up, because that voice is familiar like the back of his own hand.

Keep reading

Mystic Production

Welcome to Mystic Production! A Youtube channel featuring a group of people with a multitude of talents!

This alternate universe where Mystic Messenger characters band together to form a YouTube channel was inspired by the many amateur production teams on YT. For my sake and selfishness, many things have been changed from the original timeline because what’s an AU if everything is the same, right?

Introduction,

Mystic Production was originally called RFA (Rika’s Fashion Assemble) that was started by Rika and V as a sort of makeup/fashion vlog channel but, inspired by the hidden gem, Zen - who later joined her team, Rika wanted to delve into short skits and they needed more people as it grew to include other things.

The name Mystic Production came about from a very early skit where they tried to fit as many mystical puns into a 10 minute video and the fans made it a meme and they laughed for 3 days before adapting it.

Rika and V were originally the face of the channel but Rika stepped back to get treatment as well as focus on fundraising efforts for the channel and other PR stuff. V naturally followed to care for her. Although their appearances in videos have dropped significantly, their hard work are still felt throughout the production. They are Mystic Production’s Mom and Dad.

Jumin is their producer of sorts. He has a full-time job as C&R’s director but due to V’s wish to include him, he provides funds if needed (that will later be refunded over time) and joins the production meetings whenever he can. Rika and V values his unique ideas even though he often clashes with Zen. He sometimes drops in for random videos so he became Mystic Production’s Easter Bunny (or Easter Kitty as Seven likes to call it)

Jaehee is a full-time Mystic Production staff. She handles script writing, timetable, casting, prop making, set building and lots of other stuff. She rarely appears in videos outside of behind the scenes and special group sessions. Despite that, she is mentioned a lot in the video because of how hardworking and amazing she is. She is Mystic Production’s Brain.

(brief reminder Canon In-game Jaehee DOESN’T need glasses and only cut her hair because it was a requirement to be Jumin’s assistant - thus this appearance)

Zen is their main actor. He is in all their skits and is the current face of the channel. Despite how the channel makes it out to be, theater and musical is still his major occupation. He sometimes appear on Makeup Monday to show theatrical make-up tutorials. Absolutely no fans believe that he’s still single. He is Mystic Production’s Casanova.

MC is the newest member of the team and taking on Rika’s place as the female face of the channel. She is nice and playful and adapted very easily into the team. Outside of skits, she helps Jaehee with props and does most of Makeup Monday. She is Mystic Production’s Sweetheart.

Seven and Unknown dabble mostly in the background. They handle the sensitive equipments and help edit the videos. On Friday Nights, they will hold a Gaming Night with Yoosung where they post a video in which they review and discuss about a game while they play it. Seven also sometimes appear on Makeup Monday to do character cosplay make-up tutorials. They are Mystic Production’s Twins.

Yoosung is Rika’s cousin who is still in college. He appears in Skit videos as an additional character. He mostly is part of the background team, helping with lighting or sound. He is the main face of Gaming Night and even has his own personal channel for Let’s Play series. Because of his bright personality and being the youngest, he is Mystic Production’s Maknae.

Vanderwood is an extra hand Seven can somehow summon whenever they are in need of extra help. He never appears outside of behind the scenes videos and never tries to interact with the camera. He is dubbed Mystic Production’s Ghost.

The channel posts content 4 days a week, Make-up Monday, Short skits on Wednesday, Gaming Night on Friday and a compilation of behind the scenes on Sunday. Every last Saturday of the month, they will hold a group livestream to help raise funds for several causes.

There are moments where several members appear in videos outside of their main one like Zen teaching Yoosung to put on makeup or Jaehee and MC try to play Resident Evil while Seven is laughing like a madman in the background. The most memorable one is when Jumin plays as MC’s protective father refusing to give Zen MC’s hand in marriage because Zen ‘doesn’t respect cats enough’.

All in all, everyone has a great time and is happy. That’s all I ask from this Youtube AU done for Aurora weekly challenge.

This may have had a horrible execution but I thought a lot about this, as you can see from the wall of text. Wish I had more time to do gifs but oh well. Hope you enjoyed this and big kudos to you if you’ve read this far.

“Not only are there no happy endings…There aren’t even any endings.”

Every time I read American Gods by Neil Gaiman, I find more things to adore about this novel. I read it this time while traveling across the United States, and I have to say, something about reading this book in transit just makes sense. It makes even more sense reading it while soaring over America itself, gazing down on fields and hills, a New Jersey import who lives in Chicago, went to LA a week or so ago, and just left Florida. There is something so intensely American about this novel, and it wows me every time. From the smaller mythic chapters telling folk tales and stories of the people who brought their gods to America, to the gods themselves and their characters, this novel always gets me. This was my third time reading this novel, and I’m going to dig deep to highlight new things that I had forgotten, so solid warning: Spoilers ahead.

I will never get over the way that Neil Gaiman melds together the idea of the gods and the land, and gives them both their own power and will. Something that wows me that I often forget about the standalone is now astoundingly diverse it is without being appropriative, and how Gaiman incorporates so many cultures, a diverse range of characters, as well as a huge amount of humor without it becoming problematic. I think this novel could be a guidebook for authors who want to know how to write diverse stories and mythos respectfully. I forgot about so many fantastic characters that Gaiman pours himself into, from Samantha Black Crow to side characters that brim with energy and character themselves, like Whiskey Jack’s son or Bilquis. I also never noticed before the two mentions of Mr. Nancy’s son that point to Anansi Boys. Not to mention the wealth of research and knowledge that goes into the bottomless well of background characters and visions leading up to the battle. 

One thing I gained a new appreciation for in this novel was the character of Shadow. He is big, and not dumb, and I remembered all that, but what I forgot is how nice he is. Shadow’s such a cinnamon roll of a character, and I forget that. He stands up for a waitress and believes in the good of people. At the Lakeside library book sale, he tries to find the book that’s least likely to be purchased, so that he can help the library out by buying it. He performs coin tricks for children. He is obligated to hold Odin’s vigil, but he never questions whether he should also hold Mad Sweeney’s. As Laura speaks with the cutting, too-open words of the already-dead, Shadow still refuses to tell her about her appearance or to not hold her hand, because he doesn’t want to hurt her still. When Shadow picks up bodies with the coroners, he carries them always in his arms. 

The scene between Shadow and Odin before his death is one of my absolute favorites (other favorite scenes include Samantha Black Crow’s protest kiss, the scene in which Shadow thinks snow into being, and Shadow’s long death scene). Odin recites to Shadow what he knows—the charms, in a long list. And it ends with that long scene where Shadow wonders what would have happened if he touched Odin’s hand, and wishes he had. And Odin’s twisting grift of the fiddle is so complicated and well done that even on the third re-read, I find myself forgetting about it until the moment Odin dies, and doubting myself on it until the moment Shadow says it out loud.

@neil-gaiman’s American Gods just gets better every time I read it, and I am cautiously thrilled and excited for the show coming out later this spring. 

“It doesn’t matter that you didn’t believe in us. We believed in you.”

After Hours [m]

pairing: reader x Yoongi

Genre: tattoed!yoongi, rapper!tyoongi, angst? fluff? smut, idk how to label this haha

word count: 16,212

warnings: graphic sexual content, alcohol, language

a/n: this is loosely based of Nick and Norah’s Infinite Playlist. i am v nervous about this as it isn’t the usual angst fueled plot I normally write. so if it’s crap, please be kind haha. i’m tagging the lovely @dimplecoups​ because i know you’ve been waiting for this. and @2seoke for always being the best babe.

Originally posted by lethargicmin

You looked in the mirror, making sure your face mask was properly in place. If you were going to look like a serial killer for the next 20 minutes, you at least wanted to look the part. Your bed was calling your name as you walked over to the soft mattress, choosing to ignore the missed calls and text messages from your best friend. This was the first Saturday night you had to yourself in months. No work. No brother. No best friend. You were free to do whatever you wanted.

Or at least that’s what you had originally intended. But as the door to your bedroom crashed open you soon realized that the night had other plans for you.

“Why haven’t you answered my calls?” your best friend Irene squealed as she plopped down at the foot of your bed. “It’s Saturday night and I know you don’t have to work tomorrow!”

You gave her a look. Well, you tried to give her a look to the best of your ability as the motions of your face was restricted by the sheet mask on top of it. “There’s a reason why I didn’t answer your calls. And just because my idiot brother gave you a key to our apartment doesn’t mean you can just waltz in here any time you want.”

Irene rolled her eyes, blowing a large bubble from the gum she was constantly chewing. She was clearly not amused at your disinterest on leaving your apartment tonight. You reached forward, popping it with your pointer finger. “You’re no fun, Y/N” she whined, collecting the gum back into her mouth.

“I can’t have fun when I’m always too busy taking care of you.” you quipped, reminding her of the last time the two of you went out. “I had to beg that cop not to give you a ticket for being drunk in public. Why aren’t you bothering my brother? I’m sure he would love to see you.”

Keep reading

I don’t even know. I was taking a walk today and this idea popped into my head. I swear I’m still writing the bookstore AU, too. Also, *pops confetti*, I hit 2k followers today! Who ARE all you guys? Anyway, this fluff/ridiculousness is for you. ~1.6k words, rated G. Sterek, of course.

now also on AO3

The whole thing starts with Stiles really, really craving a meatball sub from the place across the street.

“God, someone shut him up,” Erica groans. They’re all kind of at their breaking point by now; they’ve been camped out in this meeting room all day, brainstorming. “He’s been talking about the same goddamn sandwich for seven and a half minutes now, and it’s making me hungry.”

“If only our ad campaign were about sandwiches, Stilinski would have it in the bag and we could all go home,” Isaac sighs.

From across the table, Derek rises abruptly to his feet and storms out. (Or maybe it’s just that Stiles always interprets everything Derek does as stormy. With those eyebrows, it’s hard not to.)

Stiles assumes he’s just gotten so fed up with them all that it’s either storm out or kill someone, and he’s just grateful Derek chose Door Number 1. It’s a good day not to get killed by Derek Hale.

Only, fifteen minutes later he comes back in. With a paper bag from the deli.

As soon as he gets within grabbing distance, Stiles practically collapses across the table in his haste to reach for it. “Oh my god, is that what I think it is?”

Derek holds it up over his head. “Who says this is for you? Maybe all your talk inspired me to go get a meatball sub of my own.”

“Oh, please. Like anyone with your abs eats meatball subs.” Stiles leaps to his feet on his swivel chair—because screw safety, Derek will catch him if he starts to topple over—and snatches the bag out of Derek’s grip. Derek doesn’t fight him for it very hard.

“Why don’t I get a meatball sub?” Erica whines, thumping her head down on her notebook. “Doesn’t anyone love me?”

Derek shrugs and takes his seat again. “You didn’t ask.”

“You just like Stilinski better,” she grumbles, and Derek just shrugs again.

Meanwhile, Stiles rips into the bag and takes a huge bite out of the gloriousness that is this sandwich. He can’t help throwing in a few theatrical moans just to taunt Erica, and she suitably rewards him with a glare of death across the table.

“Mmm,” Stiles says. “Derek, I love you so much, dude. Marry me.”

Instead of the grumpy eyebrows he expects, Derek meets his eye, leans back smugly in his chair, and says, “Okay.”

Keep reading

squint at where you’re from

oops sometimes you gotta

spoilers for 413, bellamy/clarke, 1600 words, gen. AO3!


Even though it’s not really the same as coming down in the first time, Bellamy still has this strange sense of deja vu as he looks at the door. The ship is smaller, he has fewer people with him, he feels both more and less sure of what he’ll find. They tried to hit the only spot of green they could see, but the controls are a mess, so he’s not sure they got to it. The whole fucking ship is a mess, built out of whatever scrap they could salvage. Even with six years to perfect it, the thing is still held together with spit and prayer, according to Raven.

But it got them to the ground. They’re back.

“Just open the fucking door!” says Raven, and Bellamy lets out a long breath and finally hits the release.

He knows what he’s hoping for: clean air, plants, blue sky. And he gets all of those.

He just also gets a girl, maybe ten or eleven, with brown hair in braids, pointing a gun at him. Which is honestly fairly encouraging; someone survived, and they have firearms. So she probably came out of the bunker.

He puts his hands up on reflex.

“Hey, uh–we come in peace,” he tries, and then says it again in Trig, for good measure. He doesn’t recognize her, but that doesn’t mean anything. She could be from another clan; there are plenty of them he doesn’t know. Or–his heart trips on the thought–she could be a nightblood. She could have survived because of that, and if she survived–

The girl pulls her gun back and looks at him critically. “Are you Bellamy Blake?”

He blinks a few times. “Um, yeah. I’m Bellamy Blake.”

“Really?”

She sounds skeptical, which doesn’t make any fucking sense. She’s the one who brought it up. There’s no reason for her not to believe him.

“Yeah, really. Did you come out of the bunker? Is my sister with you? Octavia?”

You’re Bellamy?” she says, like she didn’t hear him. She’s making a face like something smells odd. “I thought you’d be taller.”

Taller?” he asks.

Raven pokes her head out. “It’s been five minutes and you’re already being held at gunpoint? You sure have a way with people, Bellamy.”

“Look, we don’t want to hurt you,” he tells the girl. “Just–”

“I know,” she says. “You just want to see Clarke.”

Keep reading

Angel in the Darkness (M)

Originally posted by jungkook-gifs

Summary: After a patient urgently pleads you to go and help a friend of his, you naively agree to it. Little did you know, that you would get more than what you agreed to, when he leads you to a brothel, to help a dangerous prostitute named Jeon Jungkook.

Pairing: Jungkook x Reader (ft. Jin, but not romantically)

Genre: Smut (M), angst, mafia!au, prostitution!au 

Word Count: 5,468

A/N: This is a dark and filthy story! Graphic descriptions of sex (masturbating, etc), heavy dom/sub undertones, drug use, vulgar language use……(alot of smut comes in later) This is a mature read! You have been warned!

 part 2



Your mother told you that there was a purpose for what everyone does. That there is always a reason for someone’s actions; whether it was bad or good. If it was a good action, the individual has learned the most rewarding path to handle situations; regardless if it was easy or not. If it was a bad action, the person could reflect on it, and with guidance, they will learn the right way toward dealing with obstacles. And to this day, that is how you viewed life. If you handled something well, you would be rewarded in the future, if you handled it poorly, you would need to reflect on why you did such a thing, till you find the right path. With these beliefs, you always wanted to find the ‘purpose’ of an individual’s actions, and help them find the right way. So that’s how you ended up working at a rehab centre; helping mentally to find the root cause of someone’s poor actions, and leading them to a better future.

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You’re In Love With Him But He Likes Your Best Friend: Part 2

A/N: This is a filler chapter. Meaning, this is much shorter than part 1. Do not feel dishearted, there will be a longer, more detailed part 3. 

Part 1

Masterlist linked in bio.



“Are you ever going to speak to me?”

Y/n freezes as she hears Harry’s voice ask her the question she’s been dreading to answer.

It’s been two weeks since she’s heard that voice. It may sound rougher now, more stern and harsh than it normally is as it growls behind her at the counter of Lexi’s bar, but it’s still the first time she’s heard it in two weeks.

After her sober confessions to a very tipsy, slumberous Harry, Y/n had to understand what it truly meant to move on.

At first, she thought she would still be able to be around him as she searched for ways to rid her feelings. She distracted herself, mostly. She would interact more with Savannah than she would Harry, and even started picking up new habits whenever she felt her emotions creeping in. Anything that reminded her of him was disregarded entirely so that the only time he was able to consume her thoughts was whenever he was near her.

For the first couple weeks, she was holding up quite well, considering the circumstances. She was able to contain her emotions and take her mind off of the raging heartache that kept burning in her chest.

But it wasn’t much long after that night when Savannah and Harry finally became official, and if Y/n wasn’t anguished before, she surely was then. She was forced to witness the transition of their relationship in hindsight. What was once casual flirting and innocent touches turned into secretive giggles and loving hand gestures.

It was as if her heart broke all over again. What seemed to be almost completely mended was destructed all at once. The chase between Harry and Savannah was over, and reality set in that Harry was happy and in love with someone that wasn’t Y/n.

Watching them together was Y/n’s most devastating nightmare, and the thought of that alone meant she couldn’t mentally handle being alone anymore. With all of the emotions built up inside of her, being alone for Y/n meant enduring the pain and suffering she didn’t want to feel anymore. She just wanted it all to end, everything.

The earliest hours of the morning wrecked her the most. With only the moon illuminating the room and the radio silence throughout her house gave Y/n no choice but to be alone with her thoughts. She wasn’t loved, and no matter how many nights she’s tried to convince herself that this wasn’t the end, it was.

She had to let Harry go, completely this time. She gave up on him entirely because she couldn’t keep loving him when he didn’t love her. Not anymore, not like that.

She keeps her back to him as he heaves heavy breaths, eyes sending daggers and teeth clenched from his crippling frustration. 

“It’s Thursday, I see,” Harry grumbles before giving her the chance to answer, jaw locked as his fingers grip harshly around a stray, unfinished glass of alcohol. “You never work Thursdays. ’S this where your Friday shifts went?”

There’s an unpleasantly rough tone in his voice that makes Y/n’s breath hitch in her throat. She’s never witnessed this side of him, filled with anger and exasperation. He’s always been so soft and gentle, never having the heart to speak down to someone. But here he is, eyes dark with anger and words spewing venomously from his lips.

And as much she hates to admit it, she can’t blame him for being so angry with her. She knows she means the most to him—even if it’s not in a romantic sense—she’s become such an important part of his life. Ever since they met, she took in the truth about his past, understood the feelings and thoughts he’s carried all through his years, and was able to provide him with anything she was able to when he needed her most. She was one of the very few people he trusted and felt most comfortable with in his life. She was irreplaceable, he’d always tell her, nobody could compare to her. She meant everything.

And then, she left him. She distanced herself so far away from him until it was as if she was never apart of his life. She ignored him and all his attempts to reach out to her again. It hurt her tremendously, knowing that what they had together was completely and utterly helpless, but she never questioned how Harry felt about it. She did what was easiest for her and never thought about it twice. She left him so that he can be happy, but as he stands so tensely and confused before her, she can’t help but blame herself what’s happened between them.

She nods her head softly, still refusing to look up at him as she gathers all the used glasses in front of her, making herself seem distracted so she doesn’t have to make much effort into speaking to him.

“I—uh, yeah. Friday nights were getting hectic and I couldn’t keep up with the late hours. I thought Savannah told you.”

It’s a lie. A shitty, impulsive lie that Harry almost finds humorous. Of course, Y/n switched her Friday night shift. She felt as if she had no choice. She couldn’t bare to look at him with Savannah another goddamn second, and he thought of spending Friday nights with Harry without being alone with him and going to the 24-hour movie theater together was enough to make her sick to her stomach.

“She did,” he clicks his tongue, eyes narrowing as he watches her scramble around the bar, “didn’t have to, though. I knew she was lying.”

Y/n’s actions halt for a moment, a feeling of dread flowing in her veins before she goes back to cleaning off the bar, disregarded his statement completely.

Harry knows Y/n’s been avoiding him, she hasn’t exactly made it as subtle as she thought. Their entire friendship changed, and Harry knows he wasn’t the one ruining it.

The morning after Y/n drove Harry back from the bar, all he could really remember clearly was falling asleep with Y/n. There were other bits he remembered, but that was really the only moment that came to him when he woke up. And he was confused when he woke up alone because, in all honesty, he was looking forward to waking up next to her. It was all his drunk mind thought of, and that terrified him.

When Y/n started distancing herself from him, Harry kept wondering what he had done wrong. She was fine with Savannah, keeping up with their lives as usual. But she was different with Harry—closed off, in a way, and it made him feel something he’s never felt in his life before.

He was confused, to say the least. Because when he was kissing down the bare chest of the woman of his dreams, he couldn’t stop daydreaming about Y/n, and how he hasn’t heard her voice and how he hasn’t felt her in so long.

He had Savannah wrapped around his finger, yet he still felt as if everything about it was wrong. He changed when Y/n left him, because even when he was around the most loving company, he felt alone.

He was helpless. As much as he tried to love Savannah, Y/n was always in the back of his head. She was there, all the time, trapped in his mind with no escape route. 

At first, he was confused—upset and lost without Y/n. He didn’t know life without her would feel so lonely, so empty and incomplete. It was strange, not knowing how to live his life without her. He’d never expected her disappearance to be such a hindrance to him, but it was. Oh, how it was.

Then, he was angry—angry because as many times as he tried to get her to speak to him again, she never came back. She was gone, forever.

Now, he’s hurt. So damaged by her leaving his side, so incomplete and destroyed without her with him anymore. His heart is heavy with sadness and he couldn’t let himself feel this way anymore. 

He needs her, no matter how wrong and pathetic it sounds, he needs her. 

“So you gonna tell me why you’ve been avoiding me, or am I gonna have to force it out of you?” he seethes, nose flaring as he tries to steady his uneven breath.

Y/n shakes her head ignorantly, a flash on innocence in her eyes as she does so. But she damn knows well what he’s talking about, and her oblivion drives him crazy.

“I don’t—I don’t know what you’re talking ab—“

“Oh, fuck off with it!” Harry spits, slamming his closed fist down on the wooden counter.

He doesn’t seem to care about how sudden the bar falls silent, or the glisten of fear in Y/n’s eyes when she finally looks up at him. All he can seem to care about is how much pain he feels, all over. All he can think about is how now, after the last two weeks of not being able to understand why he cares so goddamn much, he’s finally able to feel some sense of sanity being in front of her now.

“You know what you’re doing to me, Y/n! You know damn fucking well what you’re fucking doing and—“

“Harry, please.” Y/n whispers and she isn’t sure as to whether or not she’s begging him to lower his voice or begging for him to understand.

“And it’s not fair!” he cries out, tears of frustration overflowing from his eyes as he grips tightly onto his hair.

His breaking point is approaching, he feels it. He feels it with every breath he takes and every word that emits from his mouth. His heart twists and breaks as he expresses every feeling that’s been consuming him for the past two weeks. He needs her to know what she’s doing to him, needs her to know how he feels in this moment.

“I did nothing to you and you keep pushing me away and that’s not fair because I don’t know how to live without you. Isn’t that something?! I don’t know what to do without you, and you know that!”

Suddenly, his head falls in his hands as he begins to sob. Complete heart-wrenching sobs, making his chest tight and breathing shallow.

Y/n reaches her hand out for him, her fingers clasping harshly around his wrist. Her own eyes start to brim with tears as she watches him sob below her, his body shaking with undying cries. She swallows harshly when he grabs ahold of her hand, bringing her palm against his forehead. His lips reach to kiss her wrist softly, quickly refraining from keeping them there longer.

To touch her, for the first time, is every answer he needs. She’s the only one to make him feel this way—she’s the only one to drive him to the brink of insanity and resurface him back to clarity. She has power over him he never understood until now, after he’s lost her.

“I don’t know why it hurts this much, Y/n,” He cries, his eyes squeezing shut as he inhales sharply, “I’ve never been more confused in my life.”

She chokes on her cries as she nods her head softly, her free hand reaching up to rake her fingers through his hair. Her lips shake from their craving to touch him, watching as he weakens beneath her. 

She’s missed him, in the most desperate of ways. She’s missed every part of him, and every atom in her body yearned to feel him again. Whether it was to feel the warmth of him from a distance or to feel his skin ignite her, she wanted every part of him against her. If she wasn’t with him, she was missing him, and craving him with every breath she took. 

Her lips press tentatively to his forehead, her breath fanning through his hair as she does so. The action is quick, leaving just as quickly as it comes, but it carries sentimental meaning for the both of them.

Harry frowns, his heart thumping in his chest. He looks up into her eyes, filled with concern and sanity as she maps his features.

“It’s been ever since me and Savannah got together.” He mumbles, eyes watching her face as it pales slightly at his words. “You haven’t spoken to me since.”

Her eyes flutter shut as he speaks, finding it completely pointless to try and make him believe otherwise. He deserves to know, one way or another, and even if it’s now, she feels like she’s already lost him. There isn’t much she’d be losing now, anyways. He was never hers.

“Please leave, Harry.” She whispers.

She backs away from him, her touch leaving him was like a gunshot to his chest. It’s a feeling he’s felt all too much that he can’t bare to feel again. 

His heart breaks as he watches her begin to cry, her usual glistening eyes now filled with tears of sorrow. He shakes his head, squeezing his eyes shut as he tentatively takes a step closer to her.

He’s desperate, and he doesn’t care how weak he seems. He’s desperate to see where he’s missed it all along, to know how long he’s been making her feel this way. He’ll never forgive himself for all the pain he’s caused her, for all her nights alone when all she wanted was to be with him.

He could have done so much to change this. If he had just listened to his heart from the beginning, this would all be different now. If he hadn’t been so blind, they would both be happy right now.

“Love, I—“

“Don’t.” she whispers, her voice cracking as she speaks, “Please, don’t.“

She isn’t exactly sure what she’s saying—isn’t quite sure what she’s begging him not to do. Maybe it’s the nickname he’s always called her that makes her stomach twist a bit more, or how he’s trying to make her feel better that makes her eyes sting with a fresh new wave of tears, or how he looks at her now the way he never did before that makes her throat tighten around a sob. Whatever it is that makes her beg, she can’t  handle it anymore.

“I’m trying, Y/n,” He whispers, “please.”

“Please just—“ her eyes flutter shut as she speaks, “just leave me alone.”

Harry lets out an unsteady breath, his green eyes brimmed with red as he watches her begin to sob. 

He nods, because he can’t let himself keep doing this to her. If he keeps trying with her in her current state of mind, she won’t be able to think properly. She’ll be a wreck, more so than she is now, and he can’t find it in his heart to do that. Even if it means fighting for her.

“It’s not worth it, you know.” He whispers, his eyes staring lovingly into hers, “Being with her, it’s not worth it if it means losing you.”

Sweet Creature

Click here if you’d like to listen to the song to help set the mood. x

It was one of those days.

Harry adored his job. He really did. His work was his first love, he always said. But there were certainly days where it all got to be a little too much.

He woke up at six in the morning to be greeted by a rainy and foggy sky outside. He spent a good ten minutes gazing at the great love of his life, her hair splayed in all different directions from having forgotten to tie it up in a ponytail like she usually did. Her lips were slightly parted, and her eyes were still puffy from the night before. He exhaled a sigh at the memory of it—it was the first time they’d really fought in a little while, but it’d been a doozy. Exhaustion took it’s toll on the both of them, but they were both too stubborn to admit it. It had been over something petty that he wasn’t even angry about anymore, even though at the moment in all seemed so important. And even though they tried to never go to bed angry, their tired eyes beat out the need to make up.

He exhaled a soft sigh as he watched his love, and he could see the tension built up in her features still from last night. He didn’t want to wake her just yet, because he knew that she would not love being woken up at six in the morning if she didn’t need to get up. The two of them rarely ever got a good night’s sleep anymore, and he didn’t want to take away her rest.

He got himself out of bed and walked over to the bathroom, going about his morning routine as quietly as possible as to not wake his girls. Within half an hour he was dressed up in a pair of black jeans and one of his button-ups. Usually he wouldn’t get so dolled up to go out this early, but he had a few morning radio shows he was making a live guest appearance on and impressions mattered to him. Having decided to get breakfast on the way to work, he quickly slipped out of the house without making a sound.

The rest of the day didn’t get any better.

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Hogwarts Headcannons
  • Give me Dean, muggleborn that he is, imitating Steve Irwin in Care of Magical Creatures class, much to everyone's confusion except for Harry and Hermione who are. On the ground. Unable to breathe. And refusing to explain why.
  • Give me Harry, demisexual that he is, realizing that the reason he can't stop obsessing over Draco is because Draco is the one who saw - and subsequently disliked - 'Harry', and not The Boy Who Lived. Realizing that Draco was the only one to first talk to him for HIM, in that robe shop, and not his parents or fame (because even Ron and Hermione did that at first). And thus, leading to him randomly starting crying in the middle of lunch and claiming he's doomed, much to everyone's fear.
  • Give me Seamus, pyro that he is, super happy one Christmas when Hermione buys him a book on fire caution, flammable materials, and elements such as magnesium. Thus afterward, the mysterious fires that have always happened are far more safe and controlled.
  • Give me Luna, wonderful airhead that she is, being stared at as, calm as anything, she waltzes right into the Slytherin common room and starts talking to the mermaids like its absolutely normal. A first year drops a book he's staring so hard, because HOW DID SHE KNOW THE PASSWORD. Draco just sighs, gets up, goes over to her, and offers her tea.
  • Give me Draco. Who looks on as Neville offers Harry rhubarb pie that he made himself, as Harry stares forlornly at his Treacle Tart, and makes and annoyed sound. "Dammit Longbottom he hates bittersweets." The Slytherins stare and Pansy just mutters "How do you even know these things. Merlin, help him realize."
  • Give me Parvati, who is being constantly mistaken for her sister by Ron, who panics and screams "IM A LESBIAN" when it gets to be too much.
  • Give me Ron, who stares wide-eyes from a distance whenever he sees Padma from that moment on for a full week, until Padma flips out too and hexes him. Parvati awkwardly wonders why Ron starts getting scared whenever she tries to approach from then on, since she knows Ron doesn't have problems due to that sort of thing from how he handles Harry.
  • Give me the thirty or so of the school's Muggle-raised, who made the mistake of showing their folks howlers, and react accordingly whenever one of the families sends one that is just a recording of Rick Astley, or High School Musical, or spoilers for Doctor Who. And the Wizard-raised just... staring... in fear... watching their savior and multiple other students as they run around screaming and crying in an absolute panic for some reason even though it was a different student that got the weird howler.
  • Give me Harry, whose hair surprises people by being dark red like his mother's when in direct sunlight. And usually at the Weasley den they're inside, but one day Harry joins them outside for a picnic, and Molly is so confused about where Harry went to then has do do a mental tally of her children.
  • Give me George, who in the midst of the final battle, hit Lucius with an Anaticula curse, so that every spell he tries makes a duck instead. And the Death Eaters are just so confused. "Lucius... is that a duck?"
  • Give me the Gryffindor common room. The new first years suggest Monopoly for game night. The entire room goes dead silent. One first year tries to ask what they did wrong. "Never mention that game again," is the only response they get. "But why-" "NEVER TALK ABOUT SIXTH YEAR. WE NEVER TALK ABOUT SIXTH YEAR." Their brave upperclassman Neville yells, trembling. Hermione starts crying. Harry goes into a panic attack. Ron whispers, "There are many reasons we don't talk about sixth year. If The Incident had been the only thing that happened, we would only not talk about The Incident. Many things happened that year. Thus, we do not speak of that year, or of that game."
  • Give me McGonagall, who struggles to control the cat population, because while students are told to have their cats fixed you know not all 100 students that brought cats did so. Her curling up around a litter that lost their mother to illness. Training them to stalk the corridors. Albus had his ways of getting information, and hers is the spy network of cats.
  • Give me muggleborns singing everything from Phantom of the Opera to Katy Perry in the corridors. Singing We Will Rock You to a pureblood who disses them for it. The purebloods thinking the weird songs and their tunes are some kind of Rite of Passage and fleeing whenever a muggleborn student starts singing. Altering song lyrics. "I throw my ferret in the air some-times, singin EEEEEEEYO, this is DRAAAAAACO!"
  • Give me muggleborns that are really confused about the whole quill instead of pens things, throwing transfigured pokeballs in Care of Magical Creatures, the band students bringing kazoos and harmonicas and the wizrd-raised students that are just so confused as to how those things even work, because it must be some sort of air magic, right??
  • Give me muggleborns making entire conversations out of pop culture references specifically to confuse some Slytherin who just called one girl a Mudblood. "These are not the droids you were looking for." "I'm right on top of that now Rose, I promise." -jazz hands-
  • Give me muggleborns with Patronus that are things like Pikachu, velociraptors, the quiet Canadian transfer student with a moose patronus the size of a SMALL HOUSE, the one whose is a angeled-out Castiel, the one whose patronus is the democrat donkey and another the republican elephant and the two, previously best friends, become mortal enemies rivaling the fame of Harry and Draco.
  • Give me muggleborns hugging each other before break, promising to 'call' each other, trading weird codes, how they can't wait to go for 'sushi' or planning that trip together to 'disneyland' where they can go flying?? But no one's allowed magic?? Or flying?? And the wizard-raised think that somehow, shockingly,<i> these children totally new to our world have developed a way to cheat the system?? Muggleborns are badasses!!</i>
  • Give me muggleborns who are fully aware that the anti-tech wards were made when, like, radios barely even existed, much less cellphone towers and microprocessors, so while they can't turn them on inside the stone school walls there's this group that Harry joins constantly that just sit there in silence staring at these tiny things and sometimes randomly laughing hysterically, and every now and then standing and just running all the way across to the other side of the lake all at the same time with no signal whatsoever. The purebloods are <i>terrified</i> of this frequent happening.
  • Give me Harry, Hermione, Dean, and Justin from the D.A, muggleborns they are, doing a movie night every week to help the D.A. relax and bond. They re-start this after the battles, during eighth year, with several other people such as the returned Slytherins joining in. The entire year they play things like Tangled, The Breakfast Club, Brave, Lion King. But then the last four weeks, they announce they don't want to mislead everyone that everything is all fun and rainbows. The last four movies are My Sister's Keeper, The Shining, Marley and Me, and for the last week, a marathon of the entire Jurassic Park series.
  • Give me Hufflepuffs, who secretly are very relieved to be the 'normal' House. Jocks over there, know-it-alls over there, goth wannabees over there, now lets go camp out by the kitchens we're gonna need it to survive the next seven years like this.
  • Give me Ravenclaws who are so done with the riddles when they stumble back at midnight after having fallen asleep in the Library. "What's the truth?" "THE TRUTH IS THAT I WILL SET YOU ON FIRE IF YOU DON'T LET ME IN."
  • Give me the Trio, who use the Marauder's Map to find the most absolutely ridiculous routes to class, knowing every single one of the shortcuts. It's not odd for them to simply appear out of the ceiling. One day the new first years try to follow them, to learn the school better, but it doesn't go so well because then they try to go through a disappearing wall the Trio just did they instead run headfirst into it, and the next time they do behind a tapestry, down a waterside, around some sort of tower, causally past an entire doorless room full of bats, and somehow come out on the complete other side of the castle.
  • Give me Draco whose just completely had it with Harry's staring and confronts him, like they always do, and Harry just blurts out that he likes Draco's new haircut and can he touch his hair, and Draco so shocked he lets him. "Potter stop treating me like a cat I'm evil remember? Bloody hell have you gone daft?!" "But... it's soft..." "I hate you." But he just can't find any anger over this, so there's like no venom whatsoever in it and Harry can't stop giggling.
  • Give me Ginny, who can't stop giggling as Luna confuses the fuck out of an entire crowd with her way of speaking, and who during seventh year could 100% get away with insulting the Death Eaters because of the way she said things. Who after Luna used said tactic to get her out of a Crucio punishment just clung to Luna, shaking, and realizing that she loves Luna so much for this very reason. That there will never be another person like Luna in her life, ever.
  • Give me Harry, who was not really well educated while living at the Dursleys, who couldn't read very well but was wonderful at sneaking around, little tricks like hiding things, and loved music. He taught himself magic tricks, and MERLIN ALMIGHTY THIS 11 YEAR OLD KID HAS MASTERED VANISHING SPELLS, WHAT, HOW, and Percy, uptight prefect he is, just looses it.
  • Give me Ron walking in on Harry talking to some random snake in their dorm room, laughing like the snake said a particularly good joke, tipping his head and smiling as he responds, the python slowly curling up his arm to rest over his shoulder. Ron freezes, stares, and then slowly backs away, closes the door and stands there staring at it for a full half hour in absolute horror.
  • Give me the rest of the D.A. walking into the Room of Requirement and hearing screaming, Dean shrieking that he's going to murder someone, Hermione crying, Justin cursing like a sailor yelling for everyone to stop, and the rest panic and run around the corner and there the four Muggle-raised students are. With some sort of odd device in their hands. Playing Mario Kart.
Rambling about Reigen

Okay, so i really like the popularity of the whole Reigen is asexual headcanon. 

For a lot of reasons. so I’m going to ramble for a bit. not just about that, but also about Reigen and friendship in general.

One thing being; he’s not the sort of character that usually gets seen or portrayed as asexual. He’s not innocent or childish or naive in any way. He’s a sly con man whose greatest weapon is his words and he isn’t above outright manipulation. but he’s also a character who places great importance on being a responsible adult, and damn well tells off adults who pick fights with children. 

But he’s also really lacking in personal connections, and throughout the series thus far has shown no interest in forming romantic relationships, never so much as acting flustered or infatuated around anyone even as a gag. 

but while he has shown no interest in romance he also seems to neglect most other relationships too, but seemingly unintentionally. his neglect of his friendships, unlike his lack of interest pursuing romance, is something that it’s often shown he regrets.

His only real interpersonal connection in the series is with Mob (and Dimple) for the longest time, and after they fall out and we find out more about Reigen’s life outside of his connection to Shigeo we also find out more about the people he knows:

The closest thing he has to friends are a bar full of easily manipulated and flakey people, who turn on him the moment the whole media scandal starts. 

But what makes this different to most ‘loner’ asexual stereotypes is the fact that Reigen is actually incredibly adept at understanding people and isn’t socially inept at all, in contrast to Mob (who in further contrast, is also really good at making friends despite his social ineptitude). 

His main downfall really is that he can be a bit too dismissive of the people he actually cares about at times, both intentionally and unintentionally. Which affects the few interpersonal connections he really does care about since he does take them for granted at times, first with mob in the separation arc, and later in a much more minor way with Serizawa, when Reigen waits until the last minute before asking to hang out with Serizawa for new years:

Serizawa is so important to me as a character, but in regards to Reigen he’s also Reigen’s first real adult friend/employee in the entire series. so while minor, this incident does inform us of quite a bit in contrast to the start of the seperation arc. For one, Reigen accepts the rejection much better than when Mob told him he was busy that time, and even though Serizawa is just as, if not more socially inept than Mob, Reigen doesn’t dismiss his claim of having other friends. So, character growth!

The fandom likes to joke about it a lot, but Reigen has become a beacon of “Dad” to all the kids in the series, as well as the adults who act like kids if i’m honest! (looking at Claw with that statement) And despite being a fraud he’s the one everyone comes to for help, adults and kids alike. 

He’s the person the former Claw members go to at the start of the second Claw arc in order to get help, same with Teru. He’s the one Mob calls to take him and his friends out alien hunting rather than asking his parents. And he’s the one who solves the problems of so many other people in the series using words or plain old common sense. He may not go about things in the most ethical way, but he always honestly tries to leave people in a better place than where they started, even if that involves manipulation.

All in all he’s a unique and complex character, and honestly I couldn’t support the ace Reigen headcanon more. 

prejudice in fantasy lit and the use of metaphor

reallybigshadowhunterstvfan said:

what can you say about making Simon a shadowhunter, Mrs Clare? it seemed odd to me that after a whole series of battling for equality between species/races, the downworlder had to become a shadowhunter. not only he basically ceased being a minority, he also became a part of a privileged community, and it just didn’t sit well with me.

Just for the record — I’m not Mrs. Clare; there is no Mr. Clare. I am married, but my pen name is not my husband’s property. :-) 

I think this is a very interesting question that brings up a ton of issues, but there are some aspects of it I’d love to clarify — for instance, I am puzzled at calling Simon “the Downworlder.” Is he more a Downworlder than Magnus? Things like that actually are really important when discussing stories — if he were the only Downworlder in the story, that would be one discussion, but he isn’t, and therefore his story does not speak for the experience of all Downworlders or even a small fraction. 

I am sorry you were surprised negatively by Simon’s story in TMI. Simon never wanted to be a vampire — he always hated it, and unlike Raphael and Lily, he never joined the community of vampires but instead spent all his time with Shadowhunters. Being a Daylighter had already changed him from being any kind of regular Downworlder, as did bearing the Mark of Cain: both made him even less “the Downworlder” and more of an anomaly. It also separated him from the other Downworlders, who treated him with distrust. In my experience, very few readers expected Simon to remain a vampire, given that it was something he never wanted or got used to, and that it was not his dream. More on that in a bit.

As to the question, to me the suggestion that Shadowhunters are “the privileged” and Dowworlders are as a block “the marginalized” — instead of being a complicated metaphor in which they sometimes but not always stand in for people who have had their rights curtailed —  overly simplifies the situation. It is an argument seems to ignore the fact that in fact, humans exist along axes of privilege and marginalization: that people can be privileged in one way and marginalized in another and that when Simon becomes first a Downworlder and then a mundane and then a Shadowhunter, he is not moving clearly from marginalization to privilege, but rather exchanging some types of privilege for others (he remains white as a Downworlder, and is a Daylighter), and exchanging some types of marginalization for others (the marginalization of being a Downworlder for the marginalization of being a mundane-born Shadowhunter and a Jew in a world where Shadowhunters are meant to have one religion). 

Because the argument disclaims spectrums of privilege and marginalization, it also suggests that the world of the Shadowhunter Chronicles is one in which there are no gay or POC or trans people in existence; one in which there is no racism, homophobia, ableism, cis privilege, or bigotry against the neuroatypical. But that is both problematic erasure, and also not true of these books. Downworlders don’t stand in for people of color or LGBTQ+ people because people of color and LGBTQ+ people are in the books; they have not been subsumed into metaphor. (I know the showrunners said there was no homophobia in the Shadowhunter world, only warlock-phobia, but that’s the show, not the books, and it has a different world and world-building. I notice this is a question I get since the show came out, and I sometimes wonder if it’s a question of confusion between the two different universes? It’s easy for that to happen.)

Fantasy prejudice metaphors are complex and confusing and they rarely work as a one to one comparison (in other words, there is a difference between saying that this fantasy situation is reminiscent of this real world thing and saying this fantasy situation is exactly the same as this real world thing. For instance, one of the really interesting things about True Blood is that it made many deliberate parallels between “vampire rights” and GLBT+ rights — referring to vampires “coming out of the coffin” and “God Hates Fangs” on church signs. However, its vampires were also often violent predators who killed and ate people. The argument that Simon “basically ceased being a minority” (while, somehow, remaining Jewish) is similar to making an argument that True Blood was saying that gay people kill and eat their neighbors; I’m fairly sure in fact, they weren’t. They were reaching for a resonance — the echo of a real world situation that would give a layer of relatability and meaning to their points about difference. But they were not creating a literal “these things are the same” comparison or they wouldn’t have had vampires chewing off people’s heads.

So: are Downworlders discriminated against? Yes, sometimes, by Shadowhunters, who are a small specific group. Do they “stand in” for a specific minority group? No, they cannot, because they are accessible as a metaphor to any marginalized group or groups whose rights have been abridged. Also: the world at large does not discriminate against Downworlders because they do not know they exist, nor do they privilege Shadowhunters because they don’t know they exist either. It would be one thing if this was a high fantasy and Shadowhunters and Downworlders were all there was, but these books are set in our world, and the characters experience real-world bigotry, racism, homophobia etc. because of it.

Alec sighed. “Sorry to wreck your vision of our happy family. I know you want to think Dad’s fine with me being gay, but he’s not.” 

“But if you don’t tell  me when people say things like that to you, or do things to hurt you, then how can I help you?” Simon could feel Isabelle’s agitation vibrating through her body. “How can I—” 

“Iz,” Alec said tiredly. “It’s not like it’s one big bad thing. It’s a lot of little invisible things. When Magnus and I were traveling, and I’d call from the road, Dad never asked how he was. When I get up to talk in Clave meetings, no one listens, and I don’t know if that’s because I’m young or if it’s because of something else. I saw Mom talking to a friend about her grandchildren and the second I walked into the room they shut up. Irina Cartwright told me it was a pity no one would ever inherit my blue eyes now.” He shrugged and looked toward Magnus, who took a hand off the wheel for a moment to place it on Alec’s. “It’s not like a stab wound you can protect me from. It’s a million little paper cuts every day.”

 *** 

“He hurt you. It was a long time ago, and I know he tried to make up for it, but—” Bat shrugged. “Maybe I’m not so forgiving.” 

Maia exhaled. “Maybe I’m not either,” she said. “The town I grew up in, all these spoiled thin rich white girls, they made me feel like crap because I didn’t look like them. When I was six, my mom tried to throw me a Barbie-themed birthday party. They make a black Barbie, you know, but they don’t make any of the stuff that goes with her—party supplies and cake toppers and all that. So we had a party for me with a blonde doll as the theme, and all these blonde girls came, and they all giggled at me behind their hands.”

***

If we carry the theory through (Shadowhunters are THE privileged, Downworlders are THE marginalized) that means that Alec, as a gay Shadowhunter, is more privileged than Simon, a straight vampire. That Ty, who would be locked in a mental institution if the Clave discovered his autism, is privileged beyond white, rich, immortal and powerful Malcolm Fade. It’s saying that when Cristina encounters a wealthy, white, straight, misogynist male werewolf in Lady Midnight who tries to force sexual attention on her, she, a Latina woman, is the one who is the privileged character because she is a Shadowhunter and he is a Downworlder (though Sterling has arguably, given that he lives outside the supernatural world, never experienced a whit of prejudice because of it.) So I’m sure you can see where the problem lies.

It also erases Simon’s Judaism entirely. Stating without caveat that Simon has become “part of a privileged community” means ignoring the fact that Simon is Jewish; that he decides in Tales that he will continue to practice, and that he was the only Jewish protag written by two Jewish authors that I’m aware of having been on the bestseller lists last year. He didn’t think about being a vampire as he was preparing to transform — he never wanted to be one or consented to be one, nor was he part of the community, as Raphael constantly pointed out — though he does later think of having previously been a Downworlder when interacting with vampires and Shadowhunter prejudices. He thought of the important thing to him: his Judaism, which he both couldn’t and wouldn’t give up. To me it is personally painful to think that for any reader, Simon’s status as a vampire is more significant than his status as a practicing Jew.

I think sometimes it is possible to invest yourself so heavily in a metaphor that you forget the real world that surrounds the metaphor and the flexibility of metaphors in general. The Shadowhunter/Downworlder situation could stand in for the systemically privileged and marginalized of our world: sometimes it does. However it also can stand in for the way totalitarian governments abuse their own people: there are echoes in Shadowhunter history and current events of the Cambodian genocide, of Stalinist violence against intellectuals and resistors. There are also echoes of police brutality — what Shadowhunters have is the privilege of the Law, specifically: the Law is what allows them to enact bigotry in the name of justice, and when they abuse their jobs, it has resonances of the way police can abuse their jobs and use the privilege conferred on them by their authority to murder and abuse the helpless and marginalized. There are also echoes of the way soldiers carry out immoral orders given by superiors: the Shadowhunters are taught to be obedient to the Clave, and one of the ways we know who our Team Good is in any TSC series that they question that obedience. All of these are echoes and resonances: they are not saying that the Shadowhunters are the police, or the US military, or the Khmer Rouge; the resonances provide context and hopefully add a sense of realism to a situation that is fantastical in its nature.

 (It’s also a wise idea not to so totally buy what the Shadowhunters are selling about themselves. They think they’re special and better and awesome, but the books constantly question and problematize that. Shadowhunters also pay a high high price for their runes and their sense of superiority: they die young and often and experience brutal constant violence and the pressures of a repressive society that allows for little divergence from an idealized norm.)

There are reasons that the Downworlders were never constructed to be a specific marginalized group and their situation was never meant to be limited in its relatability to one situation— for instance, it’s very hard to not look askance at the argument that Downworlders are meant to be specific “race” when you can become a Downworlder and then stop being one: when you can, as Simon does, change what kind of magical creature you are, because there is absolutely no correlation between that and what race or ethnicity means in our world. 

 So yes, Simon becomes a Shadowhunter: however, what I don’t see acknowledged here is not just his ethnicity and religion, but the fact that he becomes a Shadowhunter partly because he is aware of the prejudice of Shadowhunters, and fights against the bigotry they show not just to Downworlders but also to their own. He is part of Magnus and Alec’s Shadowhunter-Downworlder Alliance. He continues to work for change from within the system, arguably something almost no one else could do, because there are almost no other Downworlders who have become Shadowhunters. It is odd to me to consider Simon as simply ascending to a height of blithe privilege when he is fact much more like someone who has become a police officer in order to root out corruption and racism in the police, and brings his own knowledge of marginalization (which he still experiences) with him.

That is why Simon in Tales from the Shadowhunter Academy is constantly fighting and bending the rules in the name of his evolving social conscience, though I understand if you haven’t read TfTSA. One of the things about having had a flood of new readers enter fandom because of the TV show is that I’ve seen a lot of arguments based on the idea that TMI is the entire story of Downworlders and Shadowhunters, or the entire story of these characters. I see people talking about characters getting a happy or sad ending in TMI even when those characters go on to feature heavily in the sequel books and could by no reasonable account be considered to have any ending, happy or sad — unless you thought TMI were the only Shadowhunters books that existed rather than a chunk of a larger ongoing mythology. In no sense has Simon’s story ended: you have no idea if he will remain a Shadowhunter or not. Perhaps if you consider the fact that TMI is not a story that has ended for Simon, but rather one that continues, the fact that he has now been two magical species and might well move on to become another will sit less poorly with you? After all, this is not “after a whole series of battling for equality between species/races” this is “in the middle of a whole series of battling for equality between species/races.” Usually the middle of a story isn’t the place it’s best to draw all your conclusions from. :-) 

SAKURA HARUNO: THE STRONGEST KUNOICHI!

“Cherry blossoms in spring are special, for their beauty draws a line between them and the other flowers. She, who was the name of these flowers, works strenuously in her strict training to catch up with Naruto and Sasuke, who run before her. And then the time of blooming approached - Sakura, with her polished medical ninjutsu and strong arms, shall become the beautiful cherry blossom that heals the battlefield.”

“Tsunade, Sakura’s teacher, is the Fifth Hokage that runs the village of Konoha. Sakura, who directly received the teachings from the shinobi that sits on the most prominent place of the village, lets her talent blossom very fast, together with the subtle chakra control she naturally possesses.”

“Sakura, who excelled at chakra control, had her talent for medical ninjutsu noticed by Tsunade, her teacher, early on. She received the initiation at the techniques from Tsunade at first, and also from her elder pupil Shizune, and grew to be the best medical ninja in Konoha in the twinkle of an eye. Mastering the secret forbidden technique Tsunade used, she brings her healing to a level that exceeded Shizune. Filling her chest with the firm confidence that even if everyone suffers serious wounds, she’ll make them recover, the healing cherry blossoms blooms splendidly in profusion.”

“[…]By means of her excellent self.healing ability, even if she’s injured she recovers immediately. Thanks to the acquisition of this power, Sakura became completely able to show her proud superhuman strength without fearing the enemy’s attacks in time of war.”

“Her self-healing ability shines, ranging from defence to offence…!!”

{“THE HEALING CHERRY BLOSSOM BLOSSOMS IN THE FRONT LINE▬!”}

(Databook 4 entries - end)

_______________________________

Why is Sakura Haruno the perfect heroine and the strongest Kunoichi?

↳▬ ❝Her personality:

Kishimoto-sensei describes Sakura as stubborn, well-educated and girly. At the very beginning of the series, Sakura appears to be nothing but an ordinary 12 year old, spoiled and ignorant. Sakura, who in contrast to her teammates Sasuke and Naruto, whose lives were hard and lonely, grew up with a home and parents. This soon changes, and Sakura’s personality starts to blossom. An important key moment in that transformation is during the Chunin Exams arc in the Forest of Death when she cuts off her hair, the same hair she grew long to impress Sasuke. She cuts it off and fights her very best against Sound ninjas to protect her teammates. This is an important moment for her character as it shows her resolve to change and truly shows the beginning of Sakura’s development.

Sakura is a very compassionate character, she deeply treasures the things her friends do for her. Lee is one of those said friends, who gave it his all to protect Sakura in the Forest of Death. Sakura is grateful for that, so she thanks Lee for protecting her, cheers him on in his fight against Gaara, buys a flower for him while he’s in the hospital and their friendship begins. Her compassion shines up once more when she tries to run to his side, but gets stopped by her sensei, right after Lee loses his exams fight against Gaara.

Sakura’s compassion for others and her selflessness are what shine the most in the manga. Her desire to protect her teammates and keep them both safe is what motivates her to keep going and never give up. But that goal never stopped her from helping others who were in need of her help. She fought and cared for anyone who needed her - be it Lady Chiyo, a civilian child during the attack of Pain, a civilian child during the Wave land arc, her own young daughter, or even a wounded enemy like Karin. Sakura chose to take her destiny in her own hands and shape it to the best of her abilities.

The two most important examples that showcase how selfless Sakura truly is, are for one her desire to help Naruto fulfill his dream of becoming Hokage, and her desire to safe and help the man she loves, Sasuke.

Despite what many people like to think, Sakura’s character did not suffer because of her relationship to Sasuke. Quite the opposite. Her love for him and her desire to save him from his demons help her become aware of the important things in life. Sakura matures and becomes a realist. She took her hardship and turned it into a tool for growth and self-reflection. From that point forward, she trained and gathered information to help Sasuke and Naruto.

[“She whom you came close to killing once…she feels for and sheds tears over you, even now…she only wanted to save you!”] - Chapter 693

Sakura’s willpower develops greatly, and she learns to never give up, to always get back up on her feet, even when she’s broken and bruised.

In her fight against Akatsuki member Sasori, even though she feels fear building up in her chest, it is Sasuke and Naruto who give her the strength to be brave and face her enemy head on. She is willing to die for them if she has to. And she almost did in two instances.

One, when she tried to run in between Naruto and Sasuke on the hospital rooftop and two, when she was ready to die by Sasuke’s hand if it meant she could kill him and thus save him from his darkness.

Sakura doesn’t waver. If she truly believes in something, she won’t let go of that. But she’s not someone who puts herself in front of something more important. A good example is Sasuke’s secret mission in Gaiden. Due to unfortunate circumstances, her husband leaves to protect the village and their family. To keep everyone safe and out of danger, nobody is allowed to know Sasuke’s location. Even though this mission takes a toll on Sakura’s and Sarada’s life, Sakura knows their feelings are connected and that there’s no reason for doubt. She tries to convey that truth to her only daughter, who at first does not really understand.

Sakura is a compassionate, caring and loving mother. She gives it her all to make Sarada feel loved and safe. She also appears to be a strict mother, as Sarada shows signs of good manners, a kind personality and patience.

All in all, Sakura Haruno/Uchiha stands out as a kind, loving, compassionate and strong willed character, who never dares to give up, especially when it’s her friends or family that are on the line. The passion within her to love strongly and believe in her friends gives her the strength to keep going. Because her character story revolves mostly around being there and fighting for her loved ones and village, Sakura, who always puts those in need above everything else to the point that she is ready to die for them, is no doubt the most selfless character in the series. And that selflessness is the main source of her incredible will and strength.

↳▬ ❝Her natural talent:

[“Her chakra control and intelligence however, are nothing to look down upon.” - Databook 1.]

Intelligence and Booksmarts

Sakura has been blessed in many ways. Her intelligence is part of this. Right at the start of the manga, we learn that Sakura is naturally smart and passes all her academy exams with the best possible scores. In fact, she is said to be the smartest right after Shikamaru Nara, who, as we all know, is the smartest in their generation; making Sakura even be above talented ninja like Sasuke Uchiha and Neji Hyuga, who were at the top of their classes.

Notable proof for that is the Chunin Exams arc, in which Sakura was the only one who was able to answer all questions, despite Ibiki-sensei saying those questions couldn’t be answered by mere genin and were supposed to make the kids cheat.

Her fight with Ino also tells us, that Sakura is very booksmart. She knew Ino’s special jutsu and was able to explain its function and weakness to the reader.

Furthermore, she is also able to think and decide in mere seconds if the need arises, like tricking sound ninjas during the Forest of Death fight or freeing herself from being stuck in Sasori’s poison by letting a paper bomb explode.

[“First-rate chakra control and brainpower!!”] - Databook 1

Observation and Analytical Skills

But that’s not all. Sakura is a very good observer. She’s able to observe and memorize any pattern of movement, even those of a master puppeteer like Sasori. During their fight, Sasori had noticed that Sakura could read him like a book. He acknowledged this and even somewhat praised her for her skills. Chiyo was also surprised by this and compared Sakura to Tsunade, Sakura’s master, noting that Sakura was a very good pupil. The same Chiyo later acknowledged once again, that Sakura was capable of becoming a better Kunoichi than even Tsunade.

During the failed attempt to retrieve Sasuke a second time in Part II, Sakura and her team were held back by Obito, and within minutes, Sakura was able to analyze and explain how Obito’s (then still Tobi) Kamui worked, saying he was removing parts of his body from this reality/dimension (into another).

[“She’s shown shining potential in a fairly wide array of competences. Should she develop them, she might become a threat even to the great Sasuke!”] - Databook 1

Sakura’s passion to gather as much information as she can about something she feels she has to be prepared for, is immense. A little while after Team Seven’s first failed attempt to bring Sasuke back from Orochimaru, Sakura explains that she had noticed Sasuke’s immense growth in skill, speed and more; once again showcasing her analytical skills. She then goes on to say that she had read some books and came to the conclusion that Sasuke must have been given enhanced drugs that would speed up his training.

Another example for Sakura’s analytical nature is the war arc. She gets approached by a Zetsu who had taken on the form of Neji Hyuga. She realizes it is not Neji who is standing behind her and reacts instantly when the White Zetsu tries to attack her. She punches him to the ground, causing a great deal of damage, and tells him she knew it was him. She interrogates him. Together with Yamato’s report, and an autopsy she performs on the white Zetsu, she figures out the abilities the White Zetsu uses and concludes that it must be genetical material from Hashirama Senju being used, as the Zetsu’s DNA shows similarity with Yamato’s.

All this is proof of the fact, that Sakura Haruno was rightfully called one of the smartest. Not only is she booksmart and knows a lot about rules, technical things and ninjutsu, she is also able to analyze and memorize an individual’s behavior in mere seconds, allowing herself to prepare the right strategy. It also shows that she is very capable of memorizing important things like movement and more to the point where she is able to use that information years in advance.

Genjutsu Prowess

Sakura is naturally a genjutsu type. She is able to recognize it and set herself and others free from it. During the chunin exams when Orochimaru and the Sand attacked, she (and Shikamaru) was the only one who recognized the genjutsu in time and protected herself from it. Later on she dispelled the jutsu to wake Naruto up.

Thanks to Chiyo, Sakura knows the blindspot of the Sharingan. Using Chiyo’s information, she was able to protect herself from Itachi’s eyes and help Naruto get out of the genjutsu.This gives her the ability to fight even Sharingan users. It’s proven once more in Gaiden when Sakura attacks Shin, who has Sharingan eyes all over his head, from behind his blind spot and almost kills him.

Perfect Chakra Control

But Sakura has been blessed with more than just her high intelligence and her analytical observation skills. Sakura naturally possesses amazing chakra control. In fact, she was able to control it better than anyone else in her class. She showcases this in several arcs.

Starting with the tree climbing training where she was the first one to reach the top. Kakashi notes that Sakura is not only a genjutsu type, but also possesses amazing chakra control, better than even Sasuke. Sakura manages to get through the training exercise with ease and gives Naruto a few tips, who later on gets asked by Sasuke who wanted to know what Sakura had said, as he was struggling as well.

Medical Ninjutsu

To help her teammates, Sakura took matters in her own hands and requested to be trained by the Fifth Hokage, Tsunade Senju. With the help of her perfect chakra control, it didn’t take long until Sakura’s talent for medical ninjutsu blossomed. It had only been two and a half years that had passed since Sakura came under the guidance of Tsunade. In that time frame, Sakura became famous in Konoha for her healing abilities. Mastering medical ninjutsu is extremely difficult, as one must be able to delicately control chakra as well as have extensive knowledge and perseverance.

[“And she has developed into a top medical ninja among those in the village.”] - Databook 3

In fact, by the end of the series, Sakura Haruno had become the best medic known to humankind, thus surpassing her master Tsunade and Shizune.This is thanks to her mastering the Byakugou Seal and Tsunade’s forbidden technique, Creation Rebirth, that allows her to survive any injury and attack with even more power, thus making the technique versatile to its user as it utilises both defense and offense.

Furthermore, the user is also able to transfer their chakra to another person, Sakura does this to Obito in Chapter 685. It’s only thanks to her seal and the massive amount of stored chakra that made it possible for Sakura to help Obito and give him enough chakra to keep his Kamui jutsu active.

The Byakugou Seal is said to be the pinnacle of chakra control, making it very hard to master and control. Aside from Tsunade, Sakura is the only person known who is able to use it, surpassing  Tsunade’s first apprentice, Shizune by the age of just 17.

A medical ninja is never supposed to be at the front lines, as their job it is to heal the wounded, making it their priority to stay alive under any circumstances. However, there is an exception to that rule. Those who can use the Byakugou Seal and Creation Rebirth, are allowed to break that rule and fight at the front lines. Sakura is one of them.

By the age of 17, almost four years since Sakura started to train under the guidance of Tsunade, Sakura had mastered the forbidden technique and the Summoning Jutsu, allowing her to summon the slug, Katsuyu. Together with her summon, Sakura can activate Immense Network Healing, which allows the user to heal a great number of persons simultaneously regardless of distance. While using this technique, the user is linked with Katsuyu and has a sense of what Katsuyu might be encountering on the battlefield, as the slug splits into many parts filled with the user’s chakra before scanning the battlefield for wounded shinobi.

Her summon, Katsuyu, can spit acid strong enough to melt through rocks with ease. The acid boasts such high density and concentration it dilutes even stone, vaporizing it. All things it touches will melt away. There are no setup moves to do before this jutsu’s activation. Thanks to this one can easily strike, catching the enemy unawares, which has the advantage of denying them any opportunity to dodge. Due to its physical and genetic make up, Katsuyu is extremely resistant to damage, as seen during Pain’s attack when Katsuyu absorbed people into its body to protect them. Because of its ability to divide into smaller parts, Sakura is able to summon different parts of Katsuyu anywhere at any given time should the need arise. It can also deconstruct itself entirely, until nothing more than its body fluids are left. This, however, doesn’t weaken Katsuyu at all.

With those abilities, Sakura was able to heal and save thousands of people over the course of the series. This includes people like Naruto, Sasuke, Hinata, Kakashi, Kankuro, Chiyo, a small girl, hundreds of wounded people during the Pain attack, Shikamaru, the entire Shinobi Alliance Force during the war and more.

She is also one of the best when it comes to poisons. Even though Sasori, a member of the Akatsuki, had created a poison to which not even he knew how to create an antidote for, Sakura was able to do just that without much trouble, surprising even Chiyo, who had been sure only the great Tsunade would be able to heal the boy, for Chiyo believed Tsunade was the only one who had better knowledge of poisons than Chiyo herself. Thanks to that, Sakura saved Kankuro’s life as well as her own during her battle with Sasori.

She is also able to create a poisoned Kunai and sleeping bombs.

Sakura is shown to achieve all this by the time she turned 17. Later on, as Databook 4 tells us, Sakura learns all of Shizune’s jutsu, including poison jutsu. This is why Sakura, rightfully so, surpassed her master Tsunade as a Medic nin, and became Konoha’s best known Healer.

Sakura’s strength and evasion skills

Medical Ninjutsu is not the only thing Tsunade has taught her student. Superhuman strength and evasion is what makes Sakura Haruno the best of the best. By sending her chakra straight to her fist and letting it free in the right moment, Sakura is able to destroy nearly everything.

Unlike her master, Sakura doesn’t have to waste chakra on keeping herself young, which means she has more chakra that she can utilise over Tsunade. Which is evident by the fact that Sakura’s punches cause greater damage than Tsunade’s, both with and without the Byakugou activated. This also gets confirmed by the first Hokage, Hashirama Senju, who states that Sakura’s strength could possibly be even greater than Tsunade’s. As a reminder, Tsunade was able to break through Madara’s great Susanoo.

In fact, Sakura’s crater created by her punch in chapter 632 is the biggest one in the manga we’ve seen so far.

Through her strength she was able to defeat countless juubi clones at once in the war. In Gaiden, although she had held back due to her husband needing to question the enemy first, she almost killed Shin by attacking him from behind his blind spot, destroying entire body parts and erupting several of his vital organs. She also destroyed several of Sasori’s puppets and Sasori himself. She killed Pain’s summon with a single punch, saving a little girl in the process.

During the Sealing of Kaguya, Sakura managed something not even Sasuke or Naruto were able to do, attacking Kaguya from above and punching her with such a force that half of her horn broke off. Thanks to chakra enhanced strength, Sakura is able to keep enemies away from her, while still causing damage to them by destroying the ground underneath their feet.

However, Sakura also possesses natural strength. During her fight with Chiyo against Sasori, she lifted a boulder off Chiyo with ease.

[“That beauty and strength… it would seem as though you’ve raised another Tsunade, no?“] - Jiraiya about Sakura

To become a medic, one absolutely must learn the art of evasion.  Sakura was specifically trained in this by her master, Tsunade, who went all out on her pupil during their training. By the time Sakura was fighting Sasori, she had advanced and mastered evasion to the point where she didn’t need Chiyo’s help anymore and was able to evade Sasori’s weapons on her own.

During that fight we also learn that had Tsunade stated that evasion is the most important skill for a medic. Sakura would also learn to fight, for she was the Fifth Hokage’s apprentice and would inherit the power of a true Sannin.

A Leader

To become a Jonin, one must possess the quality to lead others with confidence and competence. Sakura proved herself worthy in several instances.

  • Sakura shows her leadership skills when she instructed the Sand Medic-nins on what to do and bring so she could create an antidote for Sasori’s poison. She later lead the operation on Kankuro.
  • Another display of this is when she took the lead during Pain’s attack and instructed Konoha-nin to evacuate the place seconds after being told how serious and dangerous the situation had become.
  • Furthermore, she motivated the entire Shinobi Alliance Force to not give up and keep fighting, to die fighting rather than die doing nothing.

This is why she rightfully became one of the three Jonin in her generation at age 18/19, together with Shikamaru Nara and Neji Hyuga (who had been promoted before them).

Without Sakura…..:

  • Naruto would have died not once or twice, but three times or possibly even more.
  • Sasuke would have bled to death
  • Hinata would have died
  • Kankuro would have died
  • Hundreds of villagers would have died during Pain’s invasion
  • A large portion of the Shinobi Alliance Force would have died
  • Karin would have died
  • Sasori would still be alive and Gaara would most likely be dead
  • Gaara would have killed Sasuke
  • Sasuke would have been consumed by the curse seal in Forest of Death
  • Sasuke would have no family
  • it would have taken much longer to find out that Zetsu clones had Hashirama’s DNA

More important Databook quotes

[“No matter how many times she’s hurt, she gets up. The unbreakable girl who grows every day.”] - Databook 2

[“ But her strength is her ability to find hope despite odds. With the pride of being a ninja deep in her heart she does not wither but faces all challenges. ”] - Databook 2

[“  In the battle field she was unnoticeable, but she is endlessly heading towards becoming the greatest of female ninjas. ”] - Databook 2

[“ One can see her strong spirit during missions. She erases fears of the opponent, doesn&#146;t back down, and bravely and boldly fights back.  ”] - Databook 2

[“ What moves Sakura is her strong belief in becoming the greatest of female ninjas. She suppresses her fear which is about to explode and fights. Is this not true courage?  ”] - Databook 2

[“ What moves Sakura is her strong belief in becoming the greatest of female ninjas. She suppresses her fear which is about to explode and fights. Is this not true courage?  ”] - Databook 2

You want to know why Sakura is the heroine and the strongest Kunoichi?

You now know why.

-Sasukekun

PS: Special thanks to @xinpaii and @amitds who’ve helped me a lot with this post!

Lachesism! Lance

sooooo this is something me and @moppingleshitoutofyou came up with a while ago, hope yall enjoy!!

you can check out some of my other mini fics here


Lance didn’t really know when it started. There were too many incidents to pinpoint its exact origins. It could have began when he tried to jump out the window when he was six to prove that he could totally fly Marcos. Or when he was nine and ate a bee when Lily said they were dangerous, because how dangerous can a chubby little bumblebee be? It was like it was always there, this little voice urging him to prove his worth through dangerous tasks.

it wasn’t until he was fifteen when the real trouble began. 

Once again, the origins of the power he was given was unknown to him. He sorta just woke up one day and bam, he felt the emotions of everyone in the house. To say it was overwhelming would be an understatement. He could practically taste his mother’s worry and his sister’s sadness and he just wanted to help them you know? Ease their pain, because no one deserved to feel those emotions. Perhaps it was then that he became aware of the feelings his felt since he was a kid. He had a form of lachesism, or at least that’s what the therapist his parents forced him to go to told him.

It took countless hours of research to figure out what the hell lachesism even was, since it wasn’t something that simply popped up in everyday conversations. And the whole emotions things? Yeah, it took a while to figure out how that fit into this mess. 

In fact, he was still trying to figure it all out when he went to the Garrison, which was yet another mess because he could feel all of the students’ emotions too. His family’s emotions were barely a sliver of what he had to endure every day. There was just, just so much sadness here. It was like a new wave hit him every time he moved, encasing him in this bubble of hurt. It was too much at times, causing him to spiral into anxiety attacks when Hunk was asleep. 

Yet, he thrived in the pain he was forced to endure everyday. Maybe it was the fact he was given this power to know what everyone was feeling, but he finally felt like he was worth something. Who else could stand feeling other’s emotions constantly thrown at them, if they were not at least worth something. Call it middle child syndrome, but Lance finally felt like he could make a difference. He could help these people! All he had to do was try to keep them happy and their sadness would begin to melt away. 

Thus, class-clown Lance was born at the age of 16, who was always there to crack a joke. He learned to talk more to make others feel comfortable and laugh loud enough for everyone to feel included. Finally, Lance felt clarity in his mind for the first time in years, and he was able to truly believe he had worth.

However this only solved the problem for a bit, as smiles can only go so far. Soon the sadness returned, albeit weaker than before, but it was still there. This unsettled Lance more than he thought it would. How could he help now? How could he prove he was more than just a cargo pilot? He was already struggling to keep up with Keith and now this? 

It was when Lance was comforting Hunk after a panic attack did he realize just how far his powers could reach. 

The two had been cuddling when Lance felt this pull, this tug towards Hunk’s emotions that he never felt before. He followed it of course and the feeling was indescribable. It was like he drowning in Hunk’s emotions, each feeling circling around him, urging him to touch, to feel. Shakily, he mentally reached out for the anxiety that kept bubbling up and it was like he sinking in this void of emotions that was endless. It wormed itself inside of Lance until it was gone, residing within him rather than Hunk. It was terrifying.

But Hunk’s smile after it was over, his slight laughter as he stated he felt better than he had in years, made it all worth it.


After being swept up in the whirlwind that was Voltron, Lance knew once again that he had worth. It wasn’t in his shooting capabilities or in his powerful bond with his lion or even in the persona he still continued. No, it was in the way he took away Pidge’s worry and soothed it with reassurance, how he slipped into Shiro’s room at night and removed the terror that plagued him to allow him a decent night of rest, and in the way he harbored Allura and Coran’s homesickness for the world they lost and offered them the feeling of family instead. This was his purpose, his way of showing his worth in subtle ways.

It took a toll on Lance though, the emotions he took away finding a home in his chest, weighing him down. He could feel the anxiety in his fingertips, the fear in his bones, and the never ending sadness in his mind. But it was worth it wasn’t it? He was protecting his teammates from the pain of these awful emotions, keeping up the spirits of Voltron through his pain. It was worth it. 

Blue didn’t think so. She’d often lecture Lance on overdoing it and how it truly wasn’t worth it, but couldn’t she see that it was? By him feeling this, surviving through this, he was able to see Pidge laugh freely and Hunk grow into his role as a paladin. Watch as Keith became more open to the group, his previous doubts now backed up with trust in his team. 

Oh cub, can’t you see how it weighs you down, how it tears you apart? She had asked one morning, specifically after a nasty panic attack. Can’t you see you’re worth more than this? That you’re more than just Lance, that you’re my paladin who doesn’t deserve this? Can’t you see?

But in the grand scheme of things, his wellbeing doesn’t matter, only that Voltron can still form. He was simply helping the process and he would be there for his team no matter what.

Despite this, Lance began to close in on himself. He spent hours upon hours with Blue, strengthening his powers so he could become more. He learned to manipulate the emotions, how to expel them onto others, making them feel the pain he suffered through each and everyday. He still went through his daily cleaning, helping each Paladin in whatever form they needed before heading back to his hangar and remaining there till night. The persona Lance built back at the Garrison had begun to crack, but it was fine because he was becoming stronger right? Now he could truly protect his team. He was no longer an emotional dump. He could send those emotions to whoever he pleased. He had worth.

The team began to get worried, however. They noticed how Lance began to close up, disappearing for hours on end. They knew they had to do something about it, but how?

“Maybe we could corner him?” Keith suggested, shrugging. 

“No, no, he wouldn’t tell us what was wrong if we did that. How about we call him up to the bridge?” Hunk replied, glancing at Shiro, who was pacing. 

“I don’t think that’ll work Hunk, you’ve seen Lance. Our best bet might be to go down to his hangar and speak to him there, the Blue Lion might help back us up,” Shiro sighed, looking down the hallway to where the hangars were,”I know he might freeze up but it’s the only option that gives us the backup of a lion.” 

The team nodded, Hunk simply turning silently, before beginning their dissent towards the hangars, nervousness tickling the back of their necks. It wasn’t long until they all stood before the door of the Blue Lion’s hangar. With a quick glance at the team Shiro was about to open it when it opened on its own silently, shocking the team slightly. Blue hummed quietly in the back of their minds before disappearing, allowing the paladins to enter her hangar. 

Hunk almost fainted at what awaited them, the rest gasping at the sight before them. 

There in the middle of the hangar, sat Lance surrounded by a hurricane of black that swirled faster with each passing second. His eyes were squeezed shut, not seeing the paladins, yet they all felt like he just knew. It was when he opened his eyes that all hell broke loose.


Here’s Part Two !

anonymous asked:

Hey, hey! Shy anon here. Would you like to share your Klance headcanons, please?

heuheuhehuehueheu don’t mind if i do

  • Lance loves Keith’s hair
    • listen. you do not constantly comment on the feature of someone else unless you are coveting it or jealous of it or love it in some way
    • lance: god your hair is stupid
      keith: then why are you running your hands through it right now
    • in all honesty, Lance loves to play w Keith’s hair???? he will braid it then run his fingers through it til it untangles then braid it again or just play with it and Keith will doze off with his head in Lance’s lap
  • they get in fights
    • a lot
    • and it’s normal and it’s okay because, in every way, opposites attract, and Lance is scared of Keith’s impulsiveness and is worried it’s gonna get Keith hurt, and Keith doesn’t understand why Lance keeps putting himself down every time someone tries to compliment him and it’s this cycle where they both eventually start to realize that maybe they have to concede their stubbornness and listen to make this work
    •  usually it ends with one of them kissing the other quiet mid-fight and gripping their cheeks and whispering “I love you, you know that?” 
  • Lance sings them to sleep when they spend the night together in one of their rooms
    • it starts off as playful, joking, annoy-the-shit-outta-Keith sing-song, until Lance starts to sing one of his favorite songs from back home and he finds he can’t make it a joke anymore because there’s this hole in his heart and it hurts so much that he has to stop because he can’t breathe anymore
    • Keith just rests his hand over Lance’s heart and whispers soft reassurances until he calms down again
    • and a little later, when Keith asks Lance to sing again for him, Lance can do it without crying this time, and it becomes their nighttime ritual, Lance humming and singing soft lyrics as they stare up at the dark ceiling that they both know will never feel like home
  • Keith likes making out
    • very much
    • to the point where their lips are numb and they can’t feel their jaws and both of them are panting and kind of pawing at each other’s faces and pushing into one another but they’re really having trouble breathing now, but they still can’t stop 
  • sometimes the two of them will just go hang out inside of Blue because Lance loves his girl and Keith loves watching Lance talk to her and get excited when buttons light up after Lance asks a question, because the way the two of them interact is so sweet, bordering on endearing, and what makes Lance happy makes Keith happy too
  • whenever Keith and Lance are stargazing out of one of the many floor-to-ceiling windows throughout the castle, Keith will always point out a blue star and say “Look. Just like your eyes.”
  • those bone-shaking, armor-clacking, rib-crushing hugs after near death battles? yeah. lots of those.
  • spooning that turns into annoyed kicks because Keith hates getting too hot and “fuck off, Lance, you’re sweaty” and “c’mooooon, you love it” and “oh my god, I will put you on the floor” 
  • Keith is a cat person so when they go to a planet and the aliens who needed help are literal cat-people with toe beans and floofy ears, he’s in near tears the entire time and he’s like “hi sorry, I just-sorry, can I-sorry-can I touch ur toe beans” and the cat-person is like “whom” and Keith is like “PLZ CAN I HOLD UR HAND” and the cat-person is shook bc a Paladin of Voltron wants to Hold Their Hand so of course they say yes and Keith nearly passes out bc he is touchin the toe beans
    • also, turns out that as much as Keith loves cats, he’s fuckin allergic to them (and he already knew this so rly he’s just a masochist) and starts uncontrollably sneezing for the entirety of the mission, but despite it all, he is still smiling and sniffling and just so Happy that he met real live cat people who let him touch the toe beans
  • sometimes when Keith gets really upset over something that’s happened or a battle that almost went horribly wrong, Lance will just hook his pinky finger around Keith’s and it’s like this thing that grounds Keith and helps him focus and close his eyes and breathe, because he knows Lance is there and that they’re gonna be okay
    • Keith never really knows how to vocalize his thanks to Lance for these moments, so he just lets it speak through his actions, like when they’re all heading to bed for the night and Keith stops Lance just to press their foreheads together for a moment before kissing Lance gently on the lips

anonymous asked:

I hate you, now fuck me

How Until My Feet Bleed by @kazliin Should Have Ended

Part of him still couldn’t believe that Yuuri was finally here with him, that this was real and not just another dream….

Digging one of his hands into the skin of Viktor’s back… slowly taking him apart, Yuuri looked at him, face flushed and staring at Viktor with an intensity that made it impossible to look away.

“I hate you.” Yuuri breathed and his eyes held none of the warmth or joy that Viktor had been feeling just seconds before. “Now fuck me.”

The words hit him like a punch to the gut and Viktor felt his fingers still in shock, the words so unexpected and unexpectedly painful that every muscle in his body froze and locked in place….

“What?!”

Victor snapped back, the rush hitting him like he was slamming back down on the ice again. To hear those words spoken outloud was a slap to the face and a plunge off a cliff, straight down the sheer rock face of confusion. Because the last time he was in a hotel room with Yuuri, he had been hearing softly muttered confessions imitating affection, and the sharp twist of reality was too much to ignore.

The chill in Yuuri’s eyes melted at Victor’s outburst, honey brown widening in betrayal of his shock. Whatever haze of lust and alcohol fleeted from them in stark reaction, and Yuuri seemed as frozen as Victor, except for his fingers trembling, curled into the bedsheets.

One breath take in an attempt to calm the mix of emotions threatening to spill forth, and Victor permitted it all burst forward despite himself. “Why are you even here then?”

Just like that, Victor saw all the confidence drain from Yuuri’s face, leaving him pale and then scrambling for shoved aside bedding to cover himself. Victor didn’t bother.

“Yuuri, I don’t-…” Years of questions leapt through every part of his mind, brawling to be the first to fall from his tongue just so he could finally hope to grasp at a single note of understanding. The most and least simple being, “why?”

If emotions and confusion, insistent need to understand were at battle inside himself, it looked like a war was raging through Yuuri. His gaze locked with Victor’s and yet he still looked torn between wanting to cling to it and to flee, clutching at the bedsheets which he brought up to cover himself, suddenly modest. “Why what?”

The tremor in his voice was all that Victor needed. “Why do you… I don’t get you, Yuuri! What the hell did I do to merit you dancing with me one moment and telling me you hate me as you try to sleep with me the next?”

A heartbeat passed. Then two.

Yuuri opened his mouth, no words coming forth, and then shut it. His eyebrows arched high into bangs messed from the heated lead up, and then his expression fell. And hardened. His red, swollen lips pursed into a thin line, and those gorgeous eyes narrowed. It almost startled Victor, to recognize in that moment the contempt he had often seen directed at him when on the podium.

“This! Exactly this!” Yuuri snapped, dropping the bedsheet as he leaned forward, closing the distance Victor placed between them. “The fact that you don’t even care enough to remember!”

“Remember what?!” Every memory of his interaction with Yuuri flashed by, but none of them could account for hate, at least not in Victor’s mind. “What I said to you in the bathroom that one time? That was–”

“No! Before that! You were my idol, Victor, and you broke my heart!”

Before that… Desperately, Victor searched every shred of memory, every hint of an interaction with Yuuri that he had treasured no matter how tense or distant, but there was nothing. “What, Yuuri, I would never–”

“You did!” Yuuri’s words cut in and Victor let him, watching the flush of arousal on Yuuri’s skin turn to one of anger and irritation instead. “I worshipped you and you insulted me. You belittled me. I was just a kid…” Yuuri inhaled a shaky breath and the dam broke. “I went to see you, when you skated your last Junior season. I got tickets as a birthday present, because I wanted nothing more than to see you skate. And after you won, I… I waited outside for you, to get your autograph. And I met you.”

It wasn’t ice in Yuuri’s eyes anymore. It wasn’t fire. It was what Victor had felt so close to, so many times himself, could recognize instantly. Defeat.

“You… you broke my heart, Victor, when I met you…”

Broken did not seem to be enough. Victor shattered, cascading into shards that littered the cold floor beside them. “I… I don’t remember.”

“Of course you don’t. I was just one fan. And you have so many. Why should you?”

He should have. Why didn’t he. “But Yuuri, it’s you. How could I not remember you?” Why would he though. Yuuri was right. He would have just been another face in the crowd. Yet Victor felt like he should. Of all the faces, of people, he should have remembered Yuuri. What had he even said.

“You didn’t. You… I just-… how many other hearts did you break, Victor? How many other dreams did you step on? Or did you forget all of those too?”

The shards fragmented. Stepped on and crushed by each syllable being confessed. He had met Yuuri, broken his heart, and couldn’t even recall how. Couldn’t even begin to guess. “Yuuri, I’m sorry-”

“Whatever,” Yuuri sighed, then shoved off the bed, but Victor reached over and grabbed his hand before Yuuri could grab his clothes off the floor, grateful for when Yuuri stopped and did not jerk away.

“Yuuri, don’t please…” He needed to understand. He would not be content to leave it at that. “You… at the Olympics, you got drunk… you told me that you liked me. Or that you liked my hair, and my eyes. So I know you can’t hate me. Not completely. And Yuuri, I don’t hate you. Please, I just need to understand, so that if I need to spend the rest of my life apologizing to you, I can mean it. So please tell me. Help me remember. Or at least, help me understand.”

Conflict writ itself in bold across Yuuri’s face, but the tension in his shoulders softened and the pull of his wrist in Victor’s hand ebbed away. The digital clock display on the hotel bedstand switched minutes, and Yuuri pulled at his lower lip with his teeth, then nodded. “Okay but… let me put something on first?”

There was a blush tinting Yuuri’s cheeks, softening him into a vision Victor had only seen in Phichit’s photos before, of a delicate Yuuri that Victor had never been permitted to see in the flesh before now. His chest felt too small for his heart as it swelled with the affection Victor had already been so bad at containing.

Without the briefest moment of hesitation, Victor rushed to the corner of the room, grabbing one of his shirts from closet since he had now regrettably torn Yuuri’s. He draped it across Yuuri’s shoulders with a gentleness that Yuuri did not seem to believe.

“I think we probably have a lot to talk about.” Victor tried to smile and felt it bloom into a real one when Yuuri scoffed, a thread of amusement and understatement so clearly wrapped around it.

“Yeah… I think… we really do.”


(The moral of the story: communication can happen, if you behave like a good person and put your dick away for just a hot second)

things Even experiences with sleepy/tired Isak:

  • lots of soft kisses and nose nuzzling
  • the radiant soft pink glow on his skin he always gets (mostly those adorable cheeks) when he’s cosy and warm in Even’s arms under their duvet
  • quiet whispered discussions about anything and everything, what they’re gonna do that day, how their homework is going, when they’re next visiting parents. just cosy domestic stuff that Even loves.
  • comfortably quiet breakfasts, sometimes over their second hand kitchen table and sometimes in bed, where they share sleepy smiles and nudge each other’s knees playfully while they eat
  • slowly dancing around their flat (if you could even call it that), as close together as two people could possibly be, the sides of their heads resting together and their arms wrapped like vines around the others waist just listening to each others breathing and their hearts beat because neither of them are awake enough to talk
  • Isak whining that they don’t need to get out of bed and meaning Even sets alarms ten minutes earlier now to accommodate Isak’s need for snuggle time
  • half arsing dinner and just ordering take out or giving up with it all together because they just want to lie down and recharge from the day’s events and how bad can it be to skip a dinner here or there
  • Isak falling asleep literally anywhere if he’s tired enough. over the kitchen table, sat in the school cafeteria, that one time Isak had been in the shower too long for even a 17 year old boy and Even went in to check on him and it turned out Isak had sat down under the shower and fallen asleep there despite (or maybe because of?) the warm water raining down on him
  • when Isak’s tired his brain gets things muddled up and his sentences sometimes come out backwards and he doesn’t even realise (like the time he asked Even if he’d homework’d his finish and Even said he didn’t study Finnish and they both stared at each other in confusion for a solid 60 seconds). most of the time Even can figure out what he means thankfully

things Even experiences with Tired™ Isak:

  • Isak getting overly emotional about everything, with all logic going out the window. homework unfinished? Isak is psyching himself out into thinking he’s going to fail all his classes. Even looked at him strangely? Even is realising Isak is a mess and he doesn’t have time for him. Isak burns dinner? he’s an impossible human being it’s no wonder his family fell apart when he can’t even cook a simple omelette. you get the idea.
  • Isak’s temper going from 0-50000 real quick. but his face always crumples before he’s even finished snapping and snarling (or shouting on the odd occasion)
  • having to wrap Isak up in so many layers and blankets because when he’s tired Isak cannot keep the cold from his bones and constantly shivers and shakes even when it’s a warm day
  • holding Isak close in the small hours of the morning while he tries to sleep, rubbing Isak’s back and stroking his curls and sometimes even rocking him gently, just wanting to help his exhausted boy sleep
  • the few times it got so bad that Even woke up to Isak shaking against him trying not to cry and when Even gathered him closer still his heart breaking when the tears spilt over Isak’s cheeks and he choked out I just want to sleep
  • the utterly terrifying night that Even can’t think about even now without breaking into a sweat. he’d woken up to the sound of retching and stumbled across to their small bathroom and found Isak hugging porcelain with a half empty bottle of sleeping pills on the floor.
  • for a wild second Even thought it was a suicide attempt and he was horrified that he’d missed warning signs that weren’t there, but when he dropped to his knees Isak choked out an apology and the tears spilled over (whether it was from the stress of vomiting or the emotional strain is still unknown) and he kept repeating that he was so tired and he just wanted to sleep. that was when Even took matters into his own hands and made Isak a doctor’s appointment
  • the many a night that Even woke up and through bleary eyes saw Isak lying awake next to him just staring blindly up at the ceiling
  • Isak not being mentally present at all for short stretches of time. sometimes he’ll even space out midsentence, to the extent that Even’s wondered if maybe Isak is having absent seizures rather than just being too exhausted to function