and he makes puns

anonymous asked:

okay omg I just have to share with someone and I know you'll understand, I signed up for a dating site and within a day I was talking to this guy and we really hit it off and today we went to a garden together and it was magical and I'm just so so so happy and I feel like a good bc it's happeneing so quickly but he is just so wonderful and he makes puns and funny jokes and he just makes me smileeeee ☺️ sorry lol I just know you would get it bc of how you and Devin met 😅

Omggggg I’m so happy for you! 😭💕 That’s literally so sweet. I so wish I could go back and experience the beginning of our relationship again because that feeling of falling in love is just the best.

Things We Learned in Phil’s New Video
  • He’s REALLY missed his bed
  • Phil’s internal monologue makes puns
  • Phil is Spatula Jesus
  • Martyn is not good at looking after plants
  • He doesn’t know if one of his plants has ever actually been alive
  • “You will burn soon, my sweet”
  • Phil got carried away at the Space Center
  • Dan in green
  • Dan bought Phil a snazzy hat
  • Phil is very excited by said snazzy hat
  • Phil Lester is a gift to mankind (but we already knew that)
NCT as family members
  • Taeil:ur grandparent that showers u in gifts, is probably senile but u love them anyway. he goes down the street to buy something to check the date printed on the reciept, forgetting he has a calendar in his house. calls I-G-A as Iga.
  • Hansol:intense cousin. doesn't say much. only really talks to Yuta at family gatherings. the oldest cousin.
  • Johnny:uncle who makes terrible jokes, and jabs you in ur ribs while ur not looking. enjoys the pain he inflicts with bad puns, makes fart noises because he still thinks it's funny.
  • Taeyong:grandparent that is terrified about cleanliness. sees a speck of something on the floor and asks u to get it because his back hurts. scared of the outside world. enjoys cooking for his grandkids.
  • Sicheng:the "cousin" who is like twice removed but he and his family come to ur family gatherings anyway and you don't know how it became a thing but u adopted him he's one of u now. screams at random intervals.
  • Kun:sicheng's brother. sicheng trails behind him at all times. tricked sicheng into thinking he was adopted for the first 8 years of his life.
  • Doyoung:uncle that leads the conversation. brings up the 'brush with fame' topic at family parties because he loves talking about semi famous people he meets. has been petitioning for a family holiday for ages.
  • Yuta:not a part of the family. hansol has been bringing him to gatherings for years, hansol's best friend, basically a pseudo cousin.
  • Ten:aunt who is wild and is still living her younger years. asks ur younger cousins for makeup advice and tells u to remember her when u get older and ur drinking and having wild XXXX. calls everyone darling.
  • Jaehyun:shy cousin. goes to his grandparents every week without being asked to. enjoys taking care of the younger ones.
  • Mark:the ringleader of the younger group of cousins. teaches them all how to dab. younger cousins all think he's the coolest ever. laughs at jokes johnny makes. the rest of the family grill him.
  • Donghyuck:relentlessly grills every family member. especially mark. the life of gatherings. will never let you live down that one thing you did at a family gathering 8 years ago. once made you laugh so hard you threw up.
  • Jeno:the only level headed one in the family. questions what he did in his past life to end up here. loves them anyway.
  • Jaemin:hyperactive cousin. always smiling. thinks he's the cutest in the family. says he's the cutest in the family. everyone just accepts it.
  • Jisung:smol confused cousin. often hangs around jaehyun, loves jaehyun. asks jaehyun to steal him food from the counter before its ready. sick of being called cute. doesn't deny it though.
Build A Boyfriend - Jimin

Originally posted by suga-com

The walk from the movie was irritating. Your friend had invited you to see a movie with her. Along the way she ran into her boyfriend and he tagged along. You then became the third wheel. Awesome. He kept making puns and teasing you about being alone. Then you just had enough

“Why don’t you have a boyfriend (y/n)? I mean it’s kinda sad you always have to be the third wheel.”

 "I wouldn’t be if you weren’t always around! Oh and I do have a boyfriend.“ You seethed before storming off ahead of them.

 You got home and closed your door. You didn’t know what you were going to do. You didn’t have a boyfriend and your friend was sure to ask about it. You couldn’t lie about it because she’d eventually figure it out but you didn’t want to tell her you lied about having one then she’d tease you more than she already did. Not wanting to deal with the stress of it all you got onto your laptop and scrolled through tumblr. Suddenly an ad appeared on the screen. "Build A Boyfriend” it said in bold letters. You clicked it and were taken to a page with a bunch of questions almost like a dating site the only difference was it asked what he SHOULD be like and look like. It was like actually building a boyfriend. You would giggle as you described your dream boy and blush when you thought about if he really existed. 

 "If only.“ You thought out loud. It was getting late and you were tired. 

You went to your room and changed for bed. Coming back to the couch you laid down deciding to sleep there for the night. You watched your show before a knock was at the door. Groaning you flung the blanket off yourself and opened the door. You glared at the person at the door for a good seconds. He just smiled at you and said hello. You stood straighter as you noticed what he looked like. He was the exact replica of your ‘dream boy’ you’d described on the "Build a Boyfriend” site. 

 "Ji-Jimin?“ You said the name you’d given him at a risk of looking weird. 

 "Hey Jagiya! Can I come in its a bit cold out here?” You shuffled to the side leaving the door open for him. 

You were in disbelief at the sight of him. How was he real? When you imagined him you didn’t realize he would be so….cute. His hair was black, parted down the middle, and looked so soft. You walked to him closer than you thought you did and watched as his cheeks flushed a pink. He smiled at your closeness and grabbed your hand. You flinched from his touch but excepted it lacing your fingers together. Your hands fit perfectly. 

 "Like your hands were made for mine.“ You said not thinking.

 "That’s because they were. I was made for you." 

 He made you feel stupid for forgetting. He chuckled at your embarrassment and placed a short kiss on your forehead. You pulled his hand and lead him to the couch. He laid down before pulling you onto his chest. It wasn’t long before you slipped into the blackness of sleep.

707? more like 404 because there’s something wrong with my computer and he needs to come fix it ;)

anonymous asked:

why do you love cal so much?

omg where do i start

do u know those cinnamon roll types post well cal is the one who ‘looks like they could kill u but is actually a cinnamon roll’ and that is why i love him to death

he says stuff like

“i am your rightful king, silver-born for centuries. the only reason you’re still breathing is because I can’t burn the oxygen from this room” (i died)

and winks at mare NOT MUCH OF AN INCENTIVE and she’s all like “the noble ladies of norta would have fainted if prince tiberias winked at them” dude’s hot afff

loves planning battles and stuff (it calms him makes him happy) and is literally a soldier

but then he also

makes (dorky) puns
is not a good swimmer (and embarrassed bc of it what a cutie)
is good with kids (imagine dad!cal bye)
doesn’t have to help the reds (flying the blackrun, training them!!) but he does
still will protect mare even if she betrayed him

anyway i just love him a lot!!!

giniroangou  asked:

Re: the difference between the official and fan translations for THAT scene - The fan translation is more correct overall, but Fai is making a pun of sorts there. He uses an established expression that is basically, "You're so handsome it's like you're dripping wet" (because water makes everyone sexier, lol, bless the Japanese language tbh.) Since in this case Kurogane literally is dripping wet, it feels more like Fai is teasing him than coming on to him, but I think we all know the truth. *_*

We sure do. 

That is absolutely wonderful to know though, in every way.

anonymous asked:

McDonalds AU hc: Mccree works as a cashier in a McDonalds, and Hanzo comes in one day to order a big mac or something for Genji, and he notices Mccree's name tag (it has Mcreeinstead of Jesse on it) and he starts making fun of his name and makes puns based off of it. For a few weeks, Hanzo keeps coming back because Genji ALWAYS wants Mcky D's, and as he sees Mcreemore and more, he stops making fun of his name and gets friendlier and friendlier until he finally asks Mcree on a date. Mcree accepts

That’s adorable and when they go on the date, McCree says that he can’t go to any place real expensive. Since he’s working on minimum wage.

Introducing my OCs! Part 3 of 8.

This is Felix Nelson. He’s a pretty happy guy and likes classic anime. He’s very energetic and loves hiking, skiing, and playing video games. He was born in Alabama and has a slight southern drawl, even after moving to the west coast, which got him teased sometimes. His major circumstance comes from the fact he had an oppressive religious upbringing and he begins to doubt his faith as he moves into adulthood. He still considers himself a Christian, but he refuses to go back to his roots.

He graduated early and works as a History professor at a community college. He mostly listens to country and some hip hop. After their failed relationship in high school, he meets Erin a second time after he gets a job at the college while she’s on an interpreting job. They hit it off with more success and get engaged after some time.

is now like. a bad time for bi louis

i’m watching this longplay of sanitarium and the main character reminds me of wilson. he keeps making inappropriate quips/puns in disturbing situations and complaining about things being unsanitary, he was some kind of doctor or something at some point, he has this weird voice that’s absolutely 100% american but yet somehow gives the impression of being faintly english, aaaaand his sanity is very much in question

(Wolfgang is supposed to be an orderly but now that I look at him again I’m thinking, orderlies are probably expected to wear shoes)