and guess whats inside it

beach beach beach beach

 If there was a zombie apocalypse the best place to go would be Target.

Lets look at the facts:

  • Targets have at maximum 3 windows. And those windows are also doors. Otherwise they are giant concrete cinder-blocks of prison like retail. 
  • Target is filled with things to quickly barricade those window-doors. such as entire gazebos, lawn furniture, exercise equipment, etc. 
  • From that point forward all you have to do is worry about the zombies that are inside.
  • Target has an intercom system, which if accessed by the correct people can be used to quickly spread information and mobilize people to get things done. 
  • Target has a large section of both perishable and non perishable food items. 
  • Target also has a vast entertainment section. (how many societies have collapsed due to conflict spurred by stress and boredom. HOW MANY)
  • Target’s roof can be easily accessed for surveillance, gathering of rainwater (with the many buckets and mini pools target has. and all water can be boiled in the Starbucks kitchen) and sniping.
  • Target’s insulation would make the harsh winter months significantly more bearable.
  • Before the power goes out, Target has sun lights (which is why its not sad inside like in so many other stores… cough Sears cough) so people who have SAD won’t get depressed. Also, Target is large and designed to feel homey so people wont go stir crazy as fast like they do in jails.
  • When the power goes out, Target has large industrial generators that can be turned on in emergencies like for cooking. 
  • Speaking of cooking, Target has several kitchens inside of it. And once the power goes, guess what Target also sells? Grills. 
  • Target also has a pharmacy. And medical supplies. So, people inside who need meds to function have a hell of a lot longer time to live unencumbered by their illness than they normally would. 
  • Some targets have tools–including power tools.
  • Target also has a tiny jail. For miscreants and rabble rousers.
  • Bedding. Real Bedding
  • Reliable indoor plumbing.

I think you could reasonably live for at least two years inside a Target before completely running out of anything vital– provided food is well rationed.
And even so, the only thing you’d be sending out scouts for is food. Everything else would last for ages.  

Provided that the population not exceed 200, Target would run out of these things in this order:

  1. perishable food.
  2. electricity
  3. Potable water (that doesn’t require work)
  4. Non perishable pre-made food items
  5. Non perishable food ingredients (flour, mixes, etc)

    How to survive in a Target: Action plan.

    Undoubtedly, everyone will be rushing and screaming in the Target. First someone has to break into the manager’s office and commandeer the intercom to create some organization by shouting: If you do not want to stay and survive in the Target, leave now. 

    After that’s cleared up and only interested parties and zombies are left. the barricading can begin. Once the doors and windows are sealed, the new goal is to clear the undead from the usable space.The undead can be deposited neatly outside of the truck loading dock doors.

    Then, someone needs to do inventory. For the next week or so, food needs to be arranged by date consumed and a rationing chart should be made. Same applies to medicine and medical supplies and toiletries.

    After food and water has been qualified and quantified,  remaining time should be dedicated to turning target into a large “home”, Bedding should be laid out in one area, there should be an entertainment area. There should be a separate area for children and babies. All of the clothing should be pushed to the side or placed in the storage area, so there is more livable space. 

    I’m sure people have more ideas but that’s all I’ve got.

This has been brought to you with love by,

Not gonna die. 

Its the year anniversary of the Gravity Falls Finale. I’m carrying a boombox, a bouquet of roses, and a bottle of straight vodka mixed with 8 Capri suns into the woods. I locate the spot where bill cipher’s shitty stone corpse is sitting. I set down the boombox and press play. A bass-boosted version of No One Mourns the Wicked blares out into the twilight. I place the flowers on his hand, take out a lighter, and set them on fire, then chug as much capri-sun-vodka as I can. I pour the rest out over his eye and whisper “to the sips you’ll never take, babe”

i think the narrative should explore the fact that clary is valentine’s daughter.

by which i mean - clary is dangerously charismatic. even alec, who hated her and has been forced to pick up after her, becomes close to her in the end. clary has stomped on every tradition and rule he was raised with, endangered countless lives - but still in the end he forgives, thanks her for saving isabelle’s life when she’s the one who endangered it.

maybe it is jocelyn’s daughter that saves the little mage child. but it is valentines daughter that went marching to magnus’s in the first place. jocelyn went to magnus when she was ready to hide - clary went to him when she was ready to fight. and when she brings the vampires and werewolves together - that type of leadership and manipulation is valentine. jocelyn helped save the downworlders by running from valentine and stealing the cup - clary doesn’t run. from the beginning she doesn’t run.

she fights, but not alone. she draws people to her, like moths to a flame. even meliorn is impressed by her, grants her a favor he’s granted no other. she negotiates with vampires, with simon’s help yes, but on her own.

and speaking of simon - valentine turned his best friend into a werewolf, and clary turned hers into a vampire. granted he was trying to kill luke and clary was trying to save simon, but still. jocelyn left luke wounded in a barn to make his choice, but clary made simon’s choice for him.

valentine and clary act - jocelyn only ever reacts. jocelyn may be a fighter, but she’s not a leader. she’s a soldier. luke is a soldier. but valentine and clary are smart enough and charming enough and ruthless enough to be generals. clary is always convinced she’s doing the right thing - even when lives are in danger and people are getting hurt she thinks she’s making the best choice for everyone. and she can usually convince most of everyone that she’s right. this is dangerous.

she’s not the same kind of leader that valentine is now. valentine is hard and violent and makes you walk over coals for his approval. but once upon a time he did what clary did - was kind and charismatic and told people that he knew what was right, that by listening to him they would be saving the world. clary has been in this world a couple of months and already she draws her inner circle around her, already she has allies that no one else has ever had before.

people are right to be wary of clary for being valentine’s daughter, but not for the reasons they think. clary will die before she joins her father, but she has the potential to succeed where her father failed. clary doesn’t like the clave, doesn’t agree with the clave, and she is valentine’s daughter more than she is jocelyns. those who knew valentine must see all his best and most terrifying qualities shining out in her. she may succeed where her father failed, and if she decides the clave is doing more harm than good - what’s to stop her in leading her allies in tearing it to the ground?

she is joan of arc, she is julias caesar. people believe in her, are willing to fight and die with their worst enemies for her, break oaths to their queen for her.

the only way to get rid of people like her is to stab her 52 times in the senate or burn her in a holy fire. but then she becomes a martyr and then shes more dangerous dead than alive.

there is someone in the clave who’s seeing clary and is seething, panicking, because this little girl is her father’s daughter, and she has the potential to amass an army that will destroy them all.

clary is valentine’s daughter.

her enemies should fear her - including valentine himself.

Hold On (trigger warning)

A/N: I’m in Prague with a friend this week and I put this on schedule so lets hope it works.
Requested to use the line “because I love you, that’s why.” Be aware this has a trigger warning, so think twice before reading. Also, I would love to hear feedback on this because I am honestly so fucking nervous.

Word count: 2,646

Hearing someone you love cry, is probably the worst feeling in the world. The worst kind of pain I’ve ever experienced. I felt her pain. Deep in my chest. In every fibre of my body. With every dense heart beat. I felt it. Hearing her desperate sore cries from the other side of the door, it killed me inside. Left me numb and frozen.

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Ya know, I think people tend to forget that our sweet boy Lucio led a country wide rebellion and expelled the corrupt Vishcar organization out of his home by blowing up buildings (and possibly the people inside) in the process….. I guess what I’m trying to get that is he isn’t exactly the “submissive” type ya dig? He’s a real go getter!

We love you Lucio <3   might finish this if school permits :/

Blow

Originally posted by harryshumjr

pairings: kol mikaelson x female!reader, damon salvatore x female!reader.

warnings: cursing, fingering and oral sex (female receiving). generally NSFW +18, you know me. hahaha :)

a/n: well, here I am to feed my readers with some kol smut and I hope y’all enjoy this just as much as I enjoyed writing it. also, all feedback is welcome. :D

word count: 1720

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Valentine’s Day with Tom Holland would include...

Originally posted by tomhollandislife

N/A: Special headcanons to celebrate Valentine’s Day - I don’t write for celebrities usually, so please, don’t insist. Happy Valentine’s Day, I love you guys <3

  • Tom is young and tbh he doesn’t have so much experience on this whole dating thing
  • So on his first Valentine’s Day with you he decides that it’s better to make simple and nice things that he knows you will like rather than plan a fancy night where things can go wrong
  • He spends half of his day working with his Marvel team, once his next movie as Spiderman is in production
  • But he sends you tons of messages - which makes his manager and Kevin Feige call his attention to the meeting they were having a couple of times
  • “I’m so sorry, I swear I’m right here with you guys now”, he says, as you reply to his message, making him blush
  • Through the messages, he apologizes to you for working on such a special day
  • And promises you that once he’s done with work, he’s all yours
  • And that’s exactly what happens
  • Tom goes to his home and get ready for you
  • He puts your favorite shirt, just because he knows you will notice and smile
  • He calls you minutes before leaving, and says that he has a surprise for you
  • Which is a little gift that he knows you will love it
  • So Tom leaves his place, with the gift on his jacket pocket, and goes to your house to pick you up
  • He hugs you really tight when he sees you, kissing your lips a few times before saying “Happy Valentine’s Day, love”
  • Tom drives you to a small gig of a band you like - a place he knows people may recognize him, but won’t do anything bigger than just shyly wave at him
  • You sing every song with him, hugging him on the slow ones
  • Then your favorite song comes up
  • And Tom feels proud to sing it at the top of his lungs as he holds your hands and hugs you from behind
  • Once the show is over, you can’t stop smiling and fangirling about the band
  • “Did you see the guitarrist? He was freaking awesome! I wish I could play like that”
  • “Oh, so now you wanna learn how to play guitar?”, Tom teases you, and you laugh
  • He then takes you to eat something - aka pizza
  • And you’re the one who order the pizzas
  • “But I don’t know what you wanna eat, Thomas!”
  • “Anything is fine, love. Although I would love you forever if you order a pizza with a lot of cheese”
  • Tom tells you about his day, how he’s excited about the new Marvel movie, and how he can’t tell you anything about it
  • On the other hand, you tell him about your day, a little problem that happened with a family member, and how you were missing him
  • “You saw me two days ago, you must really love me”, he jokes, with that beautiful british accent
  • You and Tom eats a lot of pizza, laughing at each other’s jokes, talking about movies, bands, TV shows, etc
  • And yeah, it’s something pretty simple but ends up being one of the most incredible nights of your life
  • On the way to his car, he stops and buys you a flower from a lovely old lady on the street
  • “I’ve always wanted to do this”, he laughs, as he gives you the red flower
  • “Oh gosh, you’re so sappy!”
  • “Hey!”
  • Tom then buys some ice cream too, and drives you to your home (where it was planned for him to spend the night)
  • At your place, you put a playlist you made with Tom to play on the radio, while he takes off his jacket and get two spoons on the kitchen, for the ice cream
  • You leave him for a moment, to get his present
  • “Look, babe, I was going to give you this later but it’s almost 1am and I can’t wait anymore!”
  • Tom gets surprised by how big the box is
  • He opens right away, and you can see his eyes shining when he sees a brand new guitar inside it
  • “Holy shit, love!”
  • He hugs you and gives you a lot of little kisses - all with a huge smile on his face
  • “I’m now ashamed of how little my present for you is”
  • Tom gives you the box that was on his jacket, and when you open it, you see a beautiful necklace with a spider web as a pendant
  • “Not silver, white gold. And guess what?”, he says, and he pulls a necklace from inside his shirt - with the same pendant
  • “Oh my god, Tom! This must have been so freaking expensive!”
  • All the hugs and sweet kisses then turns into a hot make out session
  • Which turns into slow and awkward sex - your first time with him
  • And the night (more like morning lol) ends up with both of you eating ice cream and Tom singing an acustic version of “Say You Won’t Let Go” by James Arthur with his new guitar
  • All for you, of course

I KNOW THIS QUOTE IS OLD BUT I STILL LIKE IT anyway i hope you had a merry christmas 

He Knows

Simon x Reader

Read Part 2

Request: “hey would you be doing requests by any chance?? If so, would you please be able to write a Simon one based off the song ‘I Know What You Did Last Summer’ - Shawn Mendes ft. Camilla Cabello. So basically the reader has been on a holiday recently and Simon has a feeling/thinks she’s cheated & there’s tension, endings up to you. I love your writing so much!! Thank you xxxx”

Note: This did not turn out the way I expected it to at all. Whelp. You brought this upon yourselves lol. 2950 words. [master list]

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anonymous asked:

It really pissed me off when Paul and John made Ringo and George sleep with then chickens and took the comfy beds for themselves.

i know like they arrive at their vacation home and immediately john and paul force them to carry all their shit inside for no reason

look at ringos face hes so resigned

then when they do get inside pauls just like “GUESS WHAT” 

and forces them to sleep there with chickens while they get the two beds. Why dont either object?? like im pretty sure george could take john and paul down in an instant but instead he just bides his time

and that raises the question of why they have chickens just hanging out  in their cottage were chicken coops not invented in the 60′s???