and gillian jacobs too

okay, so you know how the Russos keep putting Community actors in Marvel movies and they seem to be basically playing the same characters as on Community? (with the exception of Donald Glover but hang on, we’ll get there) Danny Pudi has a cameo in Winter Soldier as a SHIELD employee and Jim Rash has a cameo in Civil War as an MIT employee. So, Brynna and I came up with ideas for the other actors to be in the MCU!

  • Yvette Nicole Brown’s character owns a bakery in Virginia and commutes from DC. She makes cookies shaped like Mjolnir and Cap’s shield. She’s a big fan of both Cap and Black Panther, and when Civil War happened she was horrified by the Sokovia Accords and did a lot of yelling at the TV. Her husband is very tired of hearing about how she would kick Tony Stark’s ass if he ever showed his face in her bakery. On the other hand, she and her kids love War Machine and when Rhodey got hurt she baked him cookies and wrote him a very nice letter telling him she supports him even if his friend is a selfish asshole, and that he can come visit anytime he wants for a free sample of anything. She doesn’t really expect to hear back from him, but the very nice (if short) letter that comes in the mail one day hangs behind the counter.
  • Joel McHale’s character specializes in superhero-related cases, and works at the same firm as one Jennifer Walters. (He hit on her once, and regretted it.) Since the Incident, he’s had steady work and is majorly successful. He’s a big Tony Stark fanboy and has a big crush on him, but he doesn’t want to admit it - he just thinks he’s got very sound business sense. (Once he was walking down the street and Iron Man flew by and he got a boner, which he swears was due to the unexpected breeze and nothing else.)
  • Gillian Jacobs’ character feels very strongly about Tony Stark too: namely, she hates him and feels that he is the symbol of everything wrong with the post-Incident United States. She buys Iron Man action figures in bulk and will take them out to street corners and have “protest demonstrations” which mostly involve her either smashing them with hammers or spraying red paint all over them. This is mostly harmless, but the local police department has Ken Jeong stationed to watch her and mostly to make sure that she doesn’t come to any harm. (They’re pretty sure the worst she could do is mild property destruction, but Ken Jeong needs something to do and they can’t actually trust him with real policing.) She also protests on behalf of Cap, Scarlet Witch, and all the other members of Cap’s team, and put a washaway red streak in her hair in Wanda’s honor. (She could get this done semi-permanently at a hair salon, but no, she does it herself every few days with drugstore hair chalk or dye.) She writes Wanda letters about how she supports her in her unjust imprisonment and she won’t rest until Wanda and the others are free. Some of the letters also mention something like “I’m not a lesbian but I’d absolutely be a political lesbian with you” and Wanda is baffled but sort of flattered. Clint is horrified and overprotective and Steve has to tell him about a thousand times that there’s absolutely no way this woman could ever find their hideout. She also adopts a third cat and names it after Wanda and sends Wanda literally hundreds of pictures of it. (T’Challa hears about it and buys Wanda a scrapbook to put them in because she feels bad just throwing them away, because it is a really cute cat.)
  • Donald Glover’s character also worked at SHIELD, but not in the same department as Danny Pudi - he was a mechanic and maintenance guy, specifically air conditioning repair. After the fall of SHIELD, he and Abed found work with another tech company and at a local video rental store, respectively, and later they were brought back to work in the new Avengers facility. Gillian Jacobs happened to come across Aaron Davis once while she was protesting and called Donald immediately to warn him about his evil doppleganger, and how they probably all have evil dopplegangers and they have to find them and take them out, and at that point Donald hung up on her. (Danny was a little disappointed; it sounded kind of legit.)
  • Alison Brie’s character worked in administration at Claire Temple’s hospital, and eventually she moved and helped to found a clinic specifically for low-income people affected by incidents related to superheroes or extraterrestrials. She is a regular recurring guest on Trish Walker’s radio show to talk about how to stay safe in areas with high likelihood of incidents, as well as how to make sure children know what to do in times of crisis. (”I love seeing all the little Iron Men and Black Widows out there as much as anyone, but you can help your kiddos stay safe this Halloween and just get candy and not vaporized!”
  • Chevy Chase’s character is dead.
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GOOD NEWS GUYS I PULLED SOME OF MY OLD COMMUNITY STUFF OFF MY HARD DRIVE

There’s still a lot more to come, so prepare to return to our previously scheduled “Winter-Soldier-Blog-Explosion” until my computer gets its shit together and stops being such a little bitch.  Yes, MacBook Pro that is sitting on the floor in disgrace, I’m talking about you.  You ass.