and get the flock outta here


warning: triggers apply. adult language, sexual themes, violence. change pronouns to your liking/as you see fit!

❛ Hi, I’m looking for that thick translucent plastic sheeting. ❜
❛ Uh… We don’t sell that here. You can try at Home Depot’s.. ❜
❛ I cannot believe you don’t have that here. ❜
❛ That’s nasty talk, I won’t listen to that. ❜
❛ They ain’t scared of you, honey child. ❜
❛ When I wear makeup, I get bigger tips.  ❜
❛ Not everybody wants to have sex with you. ❜
❛ Y'all bitches don’t know what you’re missing. ❜
❛ Do you have any of that synthetic bottled blood? ❜
❛ You have any idea who you’re messing with? ❜
❛ I have no sex life to speak of, so … ❜
❛ Wonder how much one would charge for something like that? ❜
❛ Do I taste different from other people? ❜
❛ May I ask you a personal question? ❜
❛ You said you could glamour somebody into letting you bite them? ❜
❛ You don’t like not being able to control people, do you? ❜
❛ Why can’t I hear your thoughts? Do you even have any thoughts? ❜
❛ I think we need to stop seeing each other. ❜
❛ I had to bury my bloody clothes because I didn’t want my grandmother to find out. ❜
❛ Who’d have thought? Getting carded at a vampire bar. ❜
❛ They don’t die. I’ve got nothing but a future with one. ❜
❛ Take me in you. Feel me in you. We are together. ❜
❛ See bitch. You gonna wish you ain’t did that. Watch. ❜
❛ Do you think they’re capable of lovin’ a person? ❜
❛ We started many of the mysteries about ourselves centuries ago. ❜
❛ Now if I remember what feelings were, mine might be hurt. ❜
❛ Does that weird you out? We could always go someplace else! ❜
❛ Everyone has to eat, right? We are all links on the universal food chain. ❜
❛ I texted you three times… Why didn’t you reply? ❜
❛ Right now you need to do is change out of your clothes.. there’s vampire in your cleavage. ❜
❛ You’ve done this before, haven’t you? ❜
❛ I chose it. I chose it when I chose you. ❜
❛ So why don’t you go to sleep and let me be the one to worry about it. ❜
❛ So why don’t we just leave it on me, okay? ❜
❛ Oh my God, you are even better looking than you were yesterday. ❜
❛ You broke an ancient and fundamental law. ❜
❛ However, I’m feeling a bit… creative. ❜
❛ I find myself doubting whether you were ever truly human. ❜
❛ Your blood was replaced with mine. ❜
❛ I’ve been trying to explain to you at length, you have been made vampire! ❜
❛ Crap on your rules! Crap, crap, crap! ❜
❛ I don’t obey anybody! Those days are over. ❜
❛ How would you like to learn how a real vampire feeds? ❜
❛ There are others who would have done far worse and you know it. ❜
❛ Why won’t you leave me alone? ❜
❛ The vamps here are scary as shit. ❜
❛ Talk to me. Lean on me. I’ve leaned on you plenty. ❜
❛ We can go some where else if that’s how you feel about it. ❜
❛ Who cares? What matters is being with the people you love. ❜
❛ Your history is so fucked up, you have no clue what family is! ❜
❛ That’s not fair. I do have a clue. ❜
❛ This is not your territory. You have no voice here.. ❜
❛ For a vampire, you are a terrible liar. ❜
❛ What makes you think I want him back? That I’d even take him back?  ❜
❛ What are you doin’ here? I ain’t said nothin’ to nobody. ❜
❛ That can be arranged quite easily. ❜
❛ You know I don’t love you! ❜
❛ What more can I give? What is it that you want from me? ❜
❛ I let you into my house, into my bed, and into my heart. ❜
❛ All I stood for, all I believed in, I violated to be with you! ❜
❛ There are wolves in our hen house. We must defend our flock. ❜
❛ I could have you outta here in seconds. ❜
❛ The other humans wouldn’t think twice about hurting us. ❜
❛ You expect us to sit on our thumbs while you round up your men to come lynch us?  ❜
❛ I do not wish to create blood shed when none is called for. ❜ 
❛ Stand down, everyone. People, go home. It’s over now. ❜
❛ Now, I reckon I’ve already been to heaven. It was inside your wife. ❜
❛ Oh, hello darling. I was just getting to know your plaything. ❜
❛ You always did like to prey on the innocent.  ❜
❛ We had two marvelous nights in your hotel room. ❜
❛ There’s no excuse for domestic violence. ❜
❛ The bullets would’ve pushed themselves out. ❜
❛ I ain’t perfect either. I’m the guy people laugh at. ❜
❛ And how were we supposed to know that this time he meant it? ❜
❛ And who has to fucking clean that up? Me, not you, Me. ❜
❛ How’d they manage to abduct you? ❜
❛ Was it one minute or two minutes?! ❜
❛ Where were you tonight around eleven o'clock? ❜
❛ How many vampires have gone missing in your area? ❜
❛ Let’s go to the ladies room and stare at ourselves in the mirror. ❜
❛ If I do get into some kind trouble, you’ll feel it right? ❜
❛ What are you?!? What are you?!? A-a demon? A devil?! ❜
❛ Hey, Bud. Wait up. Where you going’? ❜
❛ Every time we clear one murder, two more spring up. ❜
❛ That was the best sex I’ve had in decades. ❜
❛ Didn’t you hear me? I quit! I’ve had it with this shit! ❜
❛ You should be more concerned with what I want from you. ❜
❛ Why were they all shiftin’? You almost shifted. ❜
❛ You have always so enjoyed making others suffer. ❜
❛ I welcome death because only then will I be truly free of the disease that is you! ❜
❛ Your nature?! It was never mine! ❜
❛ You haven’t suffered at the hands of others for a very long time. ❜
❛ I thought you would have been excited. ❜
❛ Fuck the Authority! It won’t be able to prove a thing. ❜
❛ Things may be getting complicated soon. ❜
❛ I’m afraid I acted somewhat impulsively while I was gone.. ❜
❛ It won’t be able to prove a thing. I made sure of that. ❜
❛ What good would it do to share my pain with you? ❜
❛ If I can’t go on, you must make a new vampire. ❜
❛ We’ve lived through so much for so long. It can’t end this quickly… ❜
❛ A hundred years I’ve been with you. ❜

anonymous asked:

Ghost ducks vs the winter soldier -bro

It all started out with coffee.

Bucky, like most of the other Avengers, lived off coffee and takeout. It was one of the simple pleasures in life, and like cheese, it got better with age. Especially now that they had coffee creamer and Starbucks. In the thirties it was black and bitter and the first time he tried it he wanted to spit it out. This stuff, however, was heaven in a Styrofoam cup.

The whole heaven thing stopped when he walked out of the subway station and into a flock of green ducks.

He didn’t like ducks, but he didn’t hate then either. As long as they minded their own business they wouldn’t get shot. But these ones… well, lets just say he was ready to make an exception. Because these weren’t your average green ducks. All of them were just… glowing green with beady red eyes that vaguely reminded him of the little squirt’s nemesis, Plasmius. How Danny got a Twilight wannabe to hate him so much, well, that was still a bit of a mystery.

People who walked past didn’t pay much attention, oddly enough. Just avoided them while they talked on the phone or tweeted about their new orange overlord.

“Come on,” Bucky said, walking towards the flock of ducks. “Shoo! Go on, get outta here,” his Brooklyn accent was unmistakable as he waved his arms at the waterfowl.

At that moment he knew he fucked up.

All of them seemed to share a brain as they flew clumsily toward him, latching their bills onto different parts of his body. They got his hand, two were on either leg, and their was one hanging from his metal arm, trying to get a better grip through the clothing.

If a little girl hadn’t made eye contact with him when he dropped his coffee all over himself he would have started screaming bloody murder. There goes his little slice of heaven.

Every tine he pulled one off they would either turn intangible and his hand would go right through them or they would just fly back onto him. After almost ten minutes if this he gave up trying, and sulked his way down the sidewalk to the Tower, which was, of course, seven blocks away.

This is just like the time with the ghost hot dogs, Bucky thought bitterly.


45 painstaking minutes later he walked through the front doors of the tower, ignoring the stares of Stark’s staff, and brushing off Happy Hogan as he pushed his way into an elevator. It stopped twice on the way up, and both times the people who had needed on said they would catch the next one. It’s okay though, he didn’t want to talk to people anyway.

By the time he made it to the living room he was sure, so sure, that he was gonna make Clint more dead than their resident ghost boy. Because as soon as he walked through those nice, pristine, expensive doors, Clint was all over him like the ducks attached to his legs and arms.

He was cooing at them, acting as if they were so fucking innocent with their death grips and hatred of him for no fucking reason.

Barton the Dog Whisperer though could apparently talk to more than just dogs because with just a little bit of persuasion they had all come and followed him (and some bread he pulled out of nowhere) and curled up on the floor next to him, literally eating out of his hand.

“Are you fucking serious right now?’ Bucky raised his voice in frustration, blowing some loose strands of hair out of his face.

Barton just shrugged and continued feeding them, and Bucky could swear one of them was laughing at him. Oh, if they weren’t already dead…


When Danny got home the last thing he expected to find was those loose ghost ducks curled up in Clint’s side sleeping, while he was also sleeping, and a moody Bucky glaring at them from across the room tending to some nasty looking red marks on his legs. He glared at Danny and shook his head before going back to his legs without a word. Danny just shrugged and pulled out his thermos.

“So, what did I miss?”

Rule of Thumb Pt. 8

Requested: yes

Summary: Sometimes things are too good to be true, 

Warnings: I’m really fucking sorry. 

Tags: @xxchexchickxx @training-wolves @netflixxxirwin @ktrivia

Originally posted by strengthcas

Life had never been better for anyone in the Winchester family. For once everyone could just sit back and breathe. Dean was so attentive, doing whatever you or little Zeppelin needed. He loved nothing more  than holding your son, feeling every little finger and toe wriggle as he tickled him. Zeppelin was a perfect baby and Dean the perfect husband, it was almost unreal. 

Rationally, you knew that you were being anxious over nothing, but the more you dwelled on your life, the more you realized you were slipping away. Moments that should have stood out to you ceased to exists. Everyday moments that should have been habitual were blurry at best. 

Laying back on the mattress,you traced your stomach out of habit, desperately trying to remember giving birth but all you got was flashes of Alex. Alex had been so long ago, but his swirling tattoos were the only consistent thing you had. Dean stirred in his sleep, but stilled. Sighing, you heaved yourself out of bed going to Zepp’s nursery. 

The feeling of the small little baby tucked safely on your chest, lips eagerly sucking on your exposed nipple as you rocked him in the chair. “Little man hungry?” Dean’s deep, throaty grit resonated around the room. You nodded without care:depressed, sad,who knows? 

Before you knew it, Dean was holding your chin in his hands, thumbs brushing your cheeks. “Are you okay sweetheart?” You nodded, blinking in attempts to rid yourself of the aching feeling in your stomach. "Now, I’m not the smartest cookie but I’m smarter than that.” 

Dean took the baby off your teat, bouncing him as he burped the little boy. Humming tunes unplaceable, he carried Zepp over to the crib helping the baby fall back asleep. “I don’t remember giving birth, he’s going to grow up and I’m not going to remember shit.” 

A scowl seemed to shadow his features for a second before he took you in his arms. "My little omega” he cooed scratching at your chin, "the  birth was long and bloody. You were so drugged up sweetheart that I wouldn’t expect you to.” 

“Right, I just feel like a bad mother.” 

He hushed you, kissing on your forehead helping you up from the rocking chair. “Let’s get you covered up and back in bed sweetheart.” Dean covered your exposed breasts, tucking the shirt back up. Tucked back in bed with Dean, he rested his hands on your lower back, pulling you closer to his warm chest. “Just  trust me.” 

Like hell, you thought. Something was just wrong or you were just crazy. The next day when Dean had left for work you searched through the archives of the bunker. Your omega genetics pulsed guilt through each vein to the point you closed off the mark so your alpha wouldn’t stop you. Disobeying the one order you had from Dean killed you, but no, you were not an omega to be messed with. 

You were surprisingly knowledgable about everything you found in the bunker eventually finding that information was missing on djinn and then you knew. It made your blood run cold with realization. Running back to the nursery, you found Zepp giggling happy sucking on his foot. “Okay come on little Zepp.” 

The only thing you knew was to get to the library. There, you searched until you found the information you needed. Zepp gurgled from the kangaroo pouch that you had him tucked in, almost signaling that you were right. Your phone buzzed and you paled as it was a text from Dean reminding you to go to Mary’s for dinner. If only luck would be so kind. 

Stealing from Mary just didn’t settle with you, especially when you knew what you had to do. Slipping the silver knife in the baby bag, you left to meet up with the only family you had ever known. This would be the last time you would eat with these people and that brought tears to your eyes. 

Seger ran out to meet you as you pulled up toward the little white farmhouse, sniffing with excitement as he brushed against your legs. Henry burst out after him, giggling. He was patient, lugging the baby bag over his shoulders as you carried Zeppelin inside. Dean was at the kitchen table with Sam, little Marilynn resting on his lap. “There’s my girl.” He grinned, taking the little girl’s hand and waving it at you. 

You could have sobbed then. The house was so full of love that it killed you to want to pack up and leave. How could you? How could you not? Jess watched you from her spot in the living room, eyes softening. “Y/N?” You offered soft eyes. “You know if you need anything, anything, I’m here.” 

Nodding,you just shrugged. “Just don’t feel good.” 

Mary watched with quirked eyebrows as you immediately joined her in the kitchen, ready to help. You shied away from cooking the meat, but know you were eagerly chopping up the meat with a knife out of nowhere. 

As the lamb cooked, you pulled away from the kitchen holding the knife in your hand. “Y/N?” Sam approached you slowly, eyes filled with pain, “Put the knife down. Come sit down and we can talk.” 

“You’re not real.” 

Shaking your head,you backed yourself into a corner watching as the family flocked around you. Dean holding little Zeppelin in his arms, “Don’t, please. Couldn’t you have just left it well enough alone? You’re happy here, safe, do you even know what your life will be like out there? Put it down and just give in.” 

“I’m sorry.” You whispered turning the blade in on yourself. No pain, no blood loss. 

A slap in your face forced your eyes open, revealing "Dean?” 

His green eyes sparkled with relief as you collapsed into his arms, “I’ve got you. Let’s get you outta here sweetheart.” 

Sam showed up soaked in sweat and blood,but grinned as you staggered against his brother. “Djinn’s taken care of. Let’s get you cleaned up.” 

As relieved as you should have been that a djinn was dead and you were alive, you didn’t know what the hell was going on or who Sam and Dean really were. 

Jasper’s got firepower in spades~

I really like the idea of Pandora’s niece being one of the few ponies (technically a dracony) that can keep her on her hooves. Children are full of surprises. Like the ability to spit a fireball big enough to barbeque an overhead flock of geese. Lots of surprises.

pandora get outta here with that weak ass sparkly pink flame

for those of you new to the party, one of my headcanons is that draconequii can naturally breathe fire, being part dragon and all. Pandora’s definitely gonna regret teaching a ten year old dracony how to shoot fire out of her face