and for being proud of your passion

You Should Have Cared Earlier [Shownu / Hyunwoo Angst]

Genre: Angst

Word Count: 1792

Summary: If he was never around, then why should you stay? He didn’t care, so neither would you.


You felt that the love that once burned with passion had been extinguished and reduced to a cold stub of wax. Monsta X had made an amazing comeback with ‘All In’ and you were more than proud of your boyfriend, but with that also came the loneliness and strain of relationship due to him never being around. Normal schedules took up quite some time but promotion schedules were double of that. You lost count of the number of days you haven’t seen him and that showed just how busy he was, leaving no time for you at all.

Sure, there were a few calls and texts here and there between the both of you but a relationship could only grow, or maintain, with time spent with each other. Hugging your pillow tightly until your knuckles turned white, you buried your face in the soft cushion and thought about where you and Hyunwoo were headed in this empty relationship, whether things would get better over time and most importantly, whether he even cared as much as you did.

You heard the front door open and things weren’t what you had expected. Shouldn’t I be running to him and telling him how much I missed him? Or shouldn’t he be running in to tell me how much he missed me? Instead, he went straight to lie on the couch and you stayed in your room, feeling too down to get up and try to have a proper conversation.

Sensing that something was wrong, Hyunwoo got up and looked at your room door which was shut. What’s she doing in there? Didn’t she hear me come in? Sighing, he went to the door and knocked thrice, pressing his ear to the door to hear a soft and weak, “Come in.”

Slowly getting up, you leaned against the bed backing and put the pillow on your lap as Hyunwoo took a seat on the chair next to your bed.

“Hey.” He tried to smile and so did you, making the atmosphere all tensed and awkward.

“So how were promotions?” You asked and he nodded his head, grinning slightly as he replied you with enthusiasm.

“It was great!” Honestly, you didn’t know whether to be happy for him or to scoff at the fact that he was having so much fun but not once, did he actually take effort to be with you or even keep the texts and calls going on for more than just five minutes. But you were in no mood to fight or argue and so you plastered the most neutral look on your face.

“That’s good.” All became cold and empty again and you couldn’t believe that that was all you had to say to him. No, actually, you did have a ton of things to say to him but they were all negative complaints, questions and accusations which you kept in for the sake of keeping peace. You were actually doing well, managing to hold back all your frustrations but Hyunwoo just had to say something that broke your self-control.

“What’s wrong with you today?” He sighed and you raised your eyebrow. What’s wrong? Taking a deep breath, you managed to maintain the smile on your face as you answered him with a lie.

“Nothing’s wrong.”

“Please, don’t give me that fake smile,” Hyunwoo rolled his eyes and you knew that you had reached your limit. The smile on your face disappeared immediately, your look changing to a serious one and full of annoyance.

“So you can tell. Good.” Hearing this, he was quite shocked as he didn’t think that there was actually something much bigger than he expected. Perhaps you had a bad day or it was the time of the month but he could tell that you were angry - and angry with him.

“What did I do?” He muttered and you scoffed.

“What did you do? Let’s start with the fact that this is my first time seeing you in weeks.” Hearing this, Hyunwoo lowered his head, understanding why you were in such a bad mood.

“It’s not my fault,” Hyunwoo countered and you gave him a look.

“I know that promotions make you extremely busy and all, but can you look at me in the eye and tell me that you were occupied every single day and that each time you ended the call was because you had to urgently get back to whatever you were doing?” He didn’t say a word and just then, your phone rang and you picked it up.

“Yeah?” You asked and Hyunwoo watched as your lips curled up into a bitter smile after hearing whatever the person on the other line had to say. “I’m okay. Thanks anyway. Bye.” Pressing the end call button, you went to your messages and saw the video your friend had sent you right after calling you.  Just like she said, it was a fancam of Hyunwoo’s collaboration stage with the maknae of yet another girl group. This was the fourth time you saw your boyfriend do such a…touchy dance with a girl group member and it hurt to watch him dance, sing and hug another girl while you were all alone, wishing he was there with you.

The harsh reality of things hit you at that moment and you could feel the lump in your throat and sting in your eyes. Ever since promotions started, other girl idols must have spent more time with Hyunwoo than you did. As he interacted with them, practiced and performed with them, you were somewhere far away and not a part of his life at all.

“_______…” He started but you ignored him, placing your phone on the bed before hugging your knees to your chest. It took a lot to not break down in tears but you were used to hiding your feelings. Hyunwoo reached out for your phone and you didn’t stop him. Let him see what I just saw. He watched the video and looked away with guilt, putting your phone back on the bed and scooting nearer to you.

“I’m sorry.”

“That’s what you said the last three times.”

“I can’t help it!”

“Son Hyunwoo, are you telling me that you can’t even control yourself?”

“It’s the choreography! Are you asking me to dance something other than what I learned?”

“Please, this is not some rated song or something. You’re wearing light blue, she’s wearing pink and the performance has a cute concept. I think that you’re supposed to be maybe holding hands, not putting your arm around her waist and leaning in for a kiss!” You pointed out and he frowned.

“It was for show, I guess? She started getting closer to me so I thought it was planned!”

“Oh, you’re always the naive one. What she does that wasn’t the plan from the start is obviously not the plan!”

“How am I supposed to-” Just then, Hyunwoo’s phone rang and you took a glance at the caller ID.

“Why is she calling you?” You raised your eyebrow when you saw the name of the very girl you two had been talking about. He ignored you, putting the phone to his ear. You watched as he put on a cheerful voice, making it impossible to tell that he had just been in a heated argument with you and you were surprised at how good his pretending got over the years. After a while, Hyunwoo ended the call and you scoffed.

“Go and get into acting,” You hissed and he shot you a glare.

“I have to go now. I’ll hear more of your ranting when I get back.” And with that, Hyunwoo left your room, leaving you stunned. He just…left? The front door slammed shut and you got up from the bed, dragged a luggage bag from the cupboard and started grabbing clothes and throwing them in.

She calls him and right after, he leaves? Your cheeks were now wet with tears and you wiped them away as you stuffed in more of your clothes from the drawer. Why should I stay in an empty home? The photo frames filled with pictures of the both of you caught your eye but you decided to leave them behind. They don’t mean anything anymore. Your toiletries came next, all packed into plastic ziploc bags and put together with the clothes. If you’re never around, then why should I stay? Soon, all your things were packed into two full luggage bags and you dragged them out of the house. You obviously don’t care about me. Locking the front door, you went to the car and loaded the boot with the two huge bags. So I won’t care about you.  


Hyunwoo looked at his watch and knew that he was going to get yelled at when he reached back home. Firstly, he left all of a sudden and secondly, he was home so late. Taking a deep breath, he opened the door and entered the house but to his surprise, all the lights were switched off and there was dead silence. Guessing that you must have fallen asleep, he opened your room door as silently as possible and peeked inside. You weren’t there. Hyunwoo flung the door open and turned on the lights, the empty wardrobes and drawers made his heart drop and his mind telling him that something was wrong. Running to the toilet, he found all your toiletries gone, leaving only his toothbrush, towel and soap .

“This isn’t funny ______!” He called as he went to the kitchen next, followed by the balcony and study room. Gone. There weren’t any traces of you left except the photos of the both of you left on the tables and walls, some stuff toys he gave you and couple shirts.

Call. I need to call her now. Whipping out his phone from his pocket, he dialed your number and his eyes widened when he heard your ringtone coming from the living room. He rushed to the dining table and when he saw your phone left there, it was if all hope was lost. How am I supposed to reach her? But a thought struck him and he dropped to the couch. You didn’t want to be reached.

The whole house felt empty. No, it was empty. So was this what you dealt with every single day? He understood you now ; why you were so disappointed, frustrated and angry. But he couldn’t do anything about it anymore. You had left, taking all your things with you and leaving the only way of communication behind. He could search all over for you but he didn’t know whether you wanted to be found.

Hyunwoo regretted. But having regrets mean that it is already too late.  

anonymous asked:

Could you do an affirmation for athletes? Being dedicated to my sport requires healthy eating and my friends are merciless with teasing me about it. Melon slices can be as valid a dessert as ice cream...right?

MELON SLICES ARE BOTH DELICIOUS AND HEALTHY, EAT THE SHIT OUTTA THAT MELON, FRIEND!!!

IT’S FUCKING FABULOUS THAT YOU HAVE SUCH DEDICATION AND PASSION FOR WHAT YOU DO!!! IT’S NOT EASY TO STICK TO A DIET OR HEALTH REGIME AND I ADMIRE THE FUCK OUTTA PEOPLE WHO CAN!!! YOUR DEDICATION IS FREAKIN’ AWESOME AND I AM TOTALLY PROUD OF YOU!!!

ALSO, THAT YOU MAINTAIN YOUR DEDICATION AND FOCUS IN THE FACE OF RIDICULE MAKES YOU ONE SERIOUS FUCKING BADASS!!! I THINK GOING FOR THE MELON WHILE YOUR FRIENDS HAVE ICE CREAM IS TOTALLY FUCKING IMPRESSIVE!!!

THIS IS THE SORT OF PASSION THAT IS GONNA MAKE YOU SUCCESSFUL!!! YOU HAVE GOT A WHOLE LOT OF STRENGTH AND DISCIPLINE, AND THAT’S TOTALLY FREAKIN’ KEY IN SPORTS AND ATHLETICS!!!

I’MMA QUEUE UP SOME AFFIRMATIONS BUT:

KICK SOME FUCKING ASS, FRIEND!!! I BELIEVE IN YOU, AS AN ATHLETE AND AS A HUMAN BEING!!!

- The Slightly Aggressive Affirmer

Rocky Road [Kush]

Artist: Kush | Word Count: 2.127 | Ice-Cream Series (4/?)

Hello! I’m back from camping again:) One scoop of this extra producer for you, anon, thanks for requesting<3

***

Being a producer was an amazing job, you’ve been making songs for years and you enjoyed it. Rather than doing jobs that you don’t like, working with your biggest passion made your life way happier. Sure, there were deadlines that you have to meet, and expectations you have to fulfill. But after a song was released and it hit the charts, those deadlines you fear and expectations you weren’t sure you could fill disappeared in an instant, as your heart would swell with pride in it. You felt proud afterwards that your works were number one on the music charts.

You were now in the middle of packing your things in the studio, since your contract with an entertainment you’ve worked for years have ended. As you were clearing things out, there was a knock on the door, and you yelled at whoever the guest was to come in, not glancing at the door at all.

“When was the last time you’ve cleaned this studio?” The visitor coughed, “You’re going out of the company and leaving dust all over the place.” You didn’t need to turn back to see Haesol, your friend, standing at the door, with his hand over his nose to cover it from the specks of dust flying around.

“I don’t know, four months, maybe?” You shrugged, “Other people seemed fine with it, and it’s just your sensitive nose, Haesol.” The blonde haired man rolled his eyes as you stuck your tongue out, as teasing Haesol was a routine you wouldn’t fail to miss from the first time you’ve known him.

“Say, what are you doing here?” You asked, “Are you going to help me pack up?” You took your marker and named each boxes with the things inside, stacking them properly.

“I’m not going to do that, actually.”

“Well then, your nose is going to turn red if you stay here any longer.”

“Go to my label, (Name).” You stopped whatever you were doing to process what he said, “I know you don’t work at any label now, so I’m offering you to work at the Black Label. Me, Kush, and Teddy have agreed to welcome you here, as I came here to notice you about this.”

“Are you actually serious with this?”

“Yeah, we talked about you these days, and decided to let you join the label if you want.”

“Did Teddy really say that? You’re not joking, are you, Haesol?”

“Do you think I would joke with you about this kind of thing, (Name)?” Haesol was smiling when he sees you light up in happiness, knowing full well what the answer would be.

“Yes! I’d love to join you guys,” You grabbed Haesol’s hand and jumped in glee, “Thank you so much, Haesol!”

“I’m glad you’re joining the team, (Name).”

 

Seoul city was covered in white as snow fell down to the road. The people that you saw around town were wearing thick coats, scarfs, earmuffs, anything to keep their body from freezing. As you drove to the Black Label building, you couldn’t help but notice how the streets weren’t as crowded as usual. Maybe it was because of the slippery road or the freezing weather that people were too lazy to get out of their warm house. But today was your first day of work at your new label, and winter wasn’t going to stop you from producing music.

As you parked your car, you noticed that you still had fifteen minutes left before you have to be at Teddy’s office. You decided to find Haesol around the building, and try to familiarize yourself with your workplace.

Your head was turning left and right, trying to spot your blonde haired friend. It was usually wasn’t hard to find him, but it he wasn’t anywhere to be found. And he wasn’t even answering his phone, so you had to walk around to search for him.

As you decided to turn left at a corner, your body suddenly crashed with a person, sending you down to the hard floor. Letting out a small yelp, you braced yourself for the impact in a few seconds. But you never made contact with the floor, as strong arms were circled around your waist, saving you just in time before your fall.

Slowly opening your eyes, you see someone you really didn’t expect to see. His eyes were wide and his mouth hung slightly apart, shock written all over him. His brown hair was covered with a hat, but you didn’t miss the tattoo he had near his hairline, right next to his ear. That was how you recognized who he was, as Kush, your boss, was the savior that came to your aid. Your cheeks turned red as he helped you stand up, feeling embarrassment rush inside of you.

“Oh my god, I’m so sorry!” You blurted out, bowing to him, “I didn’t see where I was going, and-“

“Don’t worry, a lot of people bumped here too,” Kush said, effectively stopping your rambles, “It’s an accident, it’s alright.” He gave you a small smile that calmed you down, and you smiled at him feeling grateful for what he said.

“Thank you for saving me, though,” You chuckled, “Have you seen Haesol anywhere? I was looking for him.”

“I think he’s not coming for today.”

“Does he have any schedules today?”

“I think it was a photo shoot, (Name).”

“Oh, I see-“ Your phone beeped in your pocket and you took it out, as the screen flashed a reminder that you only had five minutes left to be at Teddy’s office on time.

“Here, let me show you where his office is.” You looked up to see Kush motioning you to go now, and you accepted his help as the both of you walked towards your actual destination.

Maybe with Kush around, things wouldn’t be as bad, you thought.


You stood in front of the door to Kush’s studio, taking a deep breath and then letting it out slowly. It helped you calm your heart down, since you were excited to start working again. Especially with him, since he was one of the top producers in here. And the fact that he was really nice to you at your first encounter with himmade you felt like you’re warmly welcomed here.

After you’re ready, you knocked on the wooden door, receiving a shout of ‘come in’ from someone at the other side of the door.

Kush was sitting in front of a piano, but he was currently holding a phone, his eyes focused on the screen. He then turned back to where you stood, and gave you a smile while waving.

“Hey! Do you want to start working now?” Kush asked, and you nodded, looking like a kid who’s ready to play at the playground, eyes glimmering in anticipation.

“Can we?”

“Of course we can. Make yourself home here, and then let’s start.”


As Kush started working on a song with you, he couldn’t help but notice how the snow was getting thicker at the road, and the amount of snowflakes that fell was starting to get harder. But he gave it no attention at all as he started focusing himself on the beats once again. You were working beside him and he can see how you try to give your best, and he didn’t want to be distracted by the white puffs that are falling down outside of this building.

“Say, don’t you think the snow is kind of extreme today?” You asked all of a sudden, breaking the silence between you two.

“Yeah, I noticed that too,” Kush whispered, “But we are in the middle of December now, winter is extreme when it’s in this time.” You nodded, agreeing about what he said.

And then silence fell between the two of you again as you started to type at the computer. Kush then moved to the piano and started playing the song on it, while you hummed along to it. Suddenly, the lights started to flicker, and you both stopped everything that you were doing to stare at it. And then, the room turned dark in an instant, as all of the electricity inside the building was cut off. Kush released a groan of frustration, knowing full well what was happening.

“Power outage,” He sighed, “Something must have happened that the electricity was cut off.” You didn’t listen to any of Kush’s explanation as your eyes were glued to the large window in front of you.

“I think I know why.” You whispered, as you lifted your finger to point at the snow that was pouring up outside.

Kush’s eyes widen in horror, seeing that everything turned white outside in a fast pace. There was a blizzard going on outside, meaning that the two of you and everyone in this building is locked up in here until the blizzard settles down. And Kush was sure the blizzard could take up to a few hours or maybe a day.

“We’re stuck here.” Kush ran a hand through his hair, as the breath that he released turned into a puff of air.

Oh no.


The temperature started to drop pretty fast in the building, and you were starting to feel cold, since your jacket wasn’t helping at all. You huddled yourself at the sofa, thinking of any ways to get out of this situation and to get warmth as fast as you can. Kush had broken the bad news to you that the building doesn’t have any heater to warm the building or any electric generator at all, so you both were stuck inside. And the snow was starting to get higher, to the point that it was hard to go out of the building.

As time goes on, the only thing that keeps you grounded was Kush’s voice talking in the silence. His eyes were concerned of you, but you tried hard to look like you weren’t freezing to death. He was asking simple questions about you, and you did the same to him, as you both learned little bits of each other in the freezing weather.

“Can you hang on a little longer? I’m sure the electricity should be on again soon.” You were now laying your head on the sofa, feeling the coldness stung your bones.

“I’ll be fine, it’s just the cold,” You croaked out, “Are you yourself okay? You were always asking about how I’m doing now.” He chuckled and gave you a small smile, looking like he can still withstand the cold any longer.

Kush sat facing towards you, just staring at you deep in the eyes. You felt your heart race deeper as he didn’t break the gaze at all. Why was he staring like that? You thought to yourself in your mind.

“Come here,” Kush said all of a sudden, spreading his arms, “Maybe if we cuddle, we can get body heat to help you out.”  Your eyes turned wide as your cheeks turned red, as you stared at him as if he was crazy.

“What? Are you serious, Byunghoon?”

“Well, you are cold, and I’m cold too, maybe this can help us out.”

Your heart was racing faster, as you bit your lips, contemplating if you should accept his offer or decline it. You were freezing and so was he, but isn’t it a bit too much to cuddle on the first time you both meet? And he seemed so innocent on saying the idea out loud, as he didn’t seem to have any other intentions behind it. You reluctantly let your arms circle around him as you hugged him tight, embracing the warmth his body was emitting. You were definitely losing your mind to the cold, as you agreed to his crazy idea.

As you both cuddled together, you couldn’t help but notice how Kush reminded you of Rocky Road, an ice-cream flavor you’ve tasted before. The man that was now playing with your hair softly was kind of extra, but in a good way, and it was making him very engaging and interesting. He was a good listener too as you both conversed, and he was a person who was very goal-orientated, wanting his songs to hit number one on music charts. It was only the first time you’ve met him, yet he had sent your heart burning hot, making you feel fuzzy and warm on the inside.

“Can we stay like this a little longer?” You whispered, hiding your blushing face on his broad shoulders. Kush chuckled seeing how cute you were, and nodded as an answer, placing his head on top of yours.

“Sure.”

And somehow, the two of you found yourself falling for each other, falling hard like the snow falling outside.

anonymous asked:

So I'm too shy to turn off Anon, but I just wanted to say that I really appreciate how you do the creativity challenge and just encourage others to be practicing their craft, whatever it may be. So often I find myself needing motivation because it feels like others aren't interested, but then I see things like your challenge and it helps me remember I'm not alone and that being creative is always worth it. You're a lovely human. Thanks for everything. <3

Oh wow, thank you so much, anon! This means a lot to me. Encouraging others to be creative has really turned into a bit of a passion of mine.

You are absolutely not alone and I guarantee that if you’ve posted something, someone has read it or looked at it and thought ‘I needed that today.’

I’m proud that you’re putting yourself out there! It can be scary, but like you said, it’s so worth it. You learn so much about yourself, and it gives you the chance to meet so many wonderful people.

Good for you! :D

adult ace discourses/MOGAI talk down to teens and insult them for partaking in discourse, but I think teens are great and I’m proud of you all for being passionate for your community and history. don’t let anyone convince you your views are lesser because of your age.

This just in.

You CAN be white, and proud to be white, without being a nazi supremacist asshole that is responsible for the murder of black people!

Holy shit, it’s almost as if *YOU CAN LOVE MORE THAN ONE TYPE OF PEOPLE*

Only loving people of your own race while demeaning other people of other race, guess what? That makes you a RACIST.

If you only have enough room in your heart for one race, and that’s it, that means you have a small heart with very little room in it for anyone. You’re a heartless human being with very little passion or empathy for people.
Do you want to be that kind of person?

anonymous asked:

Crow, #11 & 12, group one

11:  Does your character have any tattoos, piercings, mechanical parts, or other body modifications? What’s the story behind them?

He has intricately detailed black wings tattooed on his back, shoulders, and halfway down his arms. They took him forever to get finished because of the detail in each feather, but he’s insanely proud of the design even if he didn’t actually draw them on his owns skin. The wings, of course, represent his name.


12:  Does your character have any addictions, allergies, diseases, illnesses, disorders, or disabilities? How does this affect their life?

(Again let’s hear it for projecting onto original characters!) Speaking solely from my own experience with it, I think that Crow is a character somewhere on the Autistic spectrum. He doesn’t like being touched (unless he initiates it), he’s really really passionate and particular about his collection of shiny things, he stays out of the thick of things when he can so he doesn’t get overstimulated, and sometimes he shuts off his helmet comm completely so he can just breathe and focus in the silence.

Happy birthday to this beautiful spectacle right here - my mom!
Mama I adore you. You are my heart. Thank you for being so strong, courageous, loving, caring, and the incredible woman that you are. Thank you for teaching me my values. Thank you for passing on your amazing wisdom to me. Thank you for echoing the words “I believe in you” since I could remember. Thank you for your passion and for instilling that in me. Thank you for wanting to make the world a better place and for wanting to make everyone happy.
I am so proud of you for all that you have overcome.
So grateful for the heart and soul you have put into our family. I could go on forever about how amazing you are. You are not even real, you are my superwoman ❤️ God bless you on your special day mama! And I pray I’ll be able to squeeze you so tight real soon ❤️🙏🏽🎂 by allybrookeofficial (on Instagram)

anonymous asked:

Okay hey! I've been totally looking forward to this all day and I'm finally off work to type up a description! I'm a heterosexual white female, standing at 5'3. I have a short asymmetrical haircut (the longer side falls at my chin and is blonde, while the shaved part is a dark brunette). I am strong willed, loyal, passionate, and I'm a proud Gryffindor. I often get in trouble for being too loyal, and I can be very stubborn at times, which can often lead to more trouble. I'm also quite funny!

i ship you with..

Originally posted by hpfansblog

draco malfoy! dude, your hair alone would have him drooling all over you. he looks to be intrigued, and to never know whats coming next. he seems to be a lad whom loves mysteries and going against the wishes of his father, so the fact that you’re a gryffindor would make him pounce. 

i’m doing a ships day all day today (july 23rd) so send in a short description about you if you want one!

Shout out to my long time best friend back home @changeisconstant31 for being amazing and helping me with my energies and finding poses in yoga to help me with my chakras and balance i love you and i’m proud of you for saying “fuck it” to the wind and following your yogi passions. 

I wish I was as brave as you.