Looking back, I can’t remember the truth. I blew everything out of proportion so I could feel the hurt and betrayal and write about it in vivid detail. It was my own method of torture. My own undoing; and I enjoyed every second of it.
Although this winter managed to break your lungs and I’m never there like you’d like me to be, I’m still counting the minutes until you’re okay and those crystallized tears just won’t melt every time you need to cry… I still think that you’re more than important and yes, your heart isn’t tended to as of late… but you’re still my favorite bed time story even if I don’t read you every night and we’re all looking for something that’s bad for us at the end of the night, but it does help– to look. It does help. Don’t stop looking. You’ll find it one of these days, even if it’s not with him.
I am super grateful for all the wonderful people who put all their hard work into writing fanfiction beautifully. So, since Fandom Fic Rec Days are coming soon, I’m going to make a couple of posts dedicated to my favorite fanfics! I have too many in Haikyuu!!, so there are subsets based on the main relationship in the fic. Enjoy!
When Kageyama wakes up he finds tears on his pillow.
Disclaimer: This is endgame HinaYachi, but honestly the KageHina portrayal requires this fic to be in this post too.
Comments: I NEVER thought I would have one favorite fanfic in all the fanfiction I have read, but this is IT. Every now and then I go back and read it again, and it still makes me feel the way I felt the first time I read it. I cry throughout the whole story now, but honestly, I’m so glad this exists. Thank you, thank you, thank you.
“Oi. Your turn to make dinner.” “No, it’s your turn.” “No way, I made it last night. Remember? We had ramen.” “Instant ramen. Which doesn’t even count as cooking.” “I did it in a pot on the stove, so it does count.“ or, kagehina in their twenties; adulting is an everyday adventure when you’ve got your best friend right there next to you.
Comments: I read this right after I got into a QPR myself (and I got my lovely QPP to read it too), and it just blew my mind. The realistic portrayal, on-point characterization and relationship development, amazing.
He was six, and the smooth, cool leather stung where it smacked to his mouth. It tasted like dirt, like dust and gym shoes and a little bit like sweat, too, and it stole the breath from his lungs and took his two front teeth away with it.
It…probably doesn’t count as a kiss, honestly, because balls don’t even have lips to kiss with, but it made him fall in love with volleyball the way real kisses make boys fall in love with girls on the playground, so Kageyama thinks it’s probably good enough.
It didn’t matter that it hurt - that it bled, bust his nose and ripped his gums and stained his mouth in red and blue and purple - what mattered was that it was his first kiss, his best kiss, and nothing was ever, ever going to change that.
His second kiss is with Hinata.
Comments: I don’t even know why or how I came to like this one, but I do. Maybe it has to do with the fact that I counted the kisses I received just like Kageyama does here.
Comments: This entire series just… gave me the feels so bad. Gosh, if you ever need lots of angst but also happy tears and you like the college AU and have enough time on your hands to read a ton, this series is for you. Actually, even if you don’t have time, this series is worth all the procrastination in the world. (Be sure to check the warnings on each work first; I haven’t put them up here.)
This list is in no way complete. These are just a handful of the several fics that have given me the feels, warmed my heart, made me melt, brightened my day, and/or inspired me. Even if those fics aren’t up here, I really appreciate the hard work of all those writers.
Stay tuned for appreciation posts of fics with other Haikyuu!! pairings, and for appreciation posts of fics for other fandoms!
Work is every bit as dead as I knew it would be, but I read the entirety of Tell Me Again How A Crush Should Feel in the first two hours of my shift, and it would have taken even less time if I hadn’t periodically had to stop and walk around a bit to work all the emotions off. Please read this lesbian ya novel, there is SO MUCH I loved about it
Part 3 Of Who Lives Who Dies, Who Tells Your Story.
I’m not crying, your crying! God, this song gets me every time.
Eliza is the perfection, the purest cinnamon roll that ever was. I want to do all of the songs like this but the last 6 Hamilton songs are just so amazing that I have to take my time and draw out every stanza. I won’t ever do L.M.M music justice but drawing it out, helps me envision what I think is happening in the show, and once i read that Alexander comes back at the end, and shows Eliza the audience, i was a huge sobbing mess, drowning in my own tears and had to draw it all out.
I’m in shock. I can’t stop crying. Carrie’s last advice column on the Guardian, just a month ago, was to a young girl named Alex who was suffering with bipolar disorder. She asked her, “how do you find a way to feel at peace even when your brain seesaws constantly?” Carrie’s response brought me to tears; “it’s an emotional survival,” she said. “You just have to do it… think of it as an opportunity to be heroic. As your bipolar sister, I’ll be watching.”
Carrie was one of the first people I knew of that had bipolar disorder too, one of the first memoirs I read and said, yeah, I see myself in here… and now all of her books sit on my shelf. Her candidness, strength, and unabashed presence gave me, and everyone in the mental health community, hope for recovery, acceptance, and better days. Every time I think of Carrie, I think of this little video of her from Comic Con in 2015 where she explained her disorder to a little boy in the audience:
“It’s kind of a virus of the brain. It makes you go very fast or very sad. Or both. Those are fun days. So, judgement isn’t one of my big good things. But I have a good voice. I can write well. I’m not a good bicycle rider. I’m just like you, only louder and faster and sleeps more.”
I remember thinking, wow…. she just made it that easy. I’m the same as you. Only louder and faster.
Thank you, Carrie. Your transparency made me better. Your words will stick with me forever. Your fight will always be remembered. You did so much good; I only wish you had more time.
In Wishful Drinking, she said: “No matter how I go, I want it reported that I drowned in moonlight.” I’ll be looking for you up there tonight.
RIP Carrie Fisher. As your bipolar sister, I’ll miss you.
Warnings: Explicit sexual content, mentions of violence, unhealthy relationship, trigger warning.
A/N: You should probably read from the first part. I don’t think I’ll be writing this story anymore, I kind of cry every time I write it, I don’t know why - it’s lame and it’s not even detailed like my other fics. Maybe because I picture it so clearly in my head and I can’t even write it as well as I’d like because I keep crying. So sorry because it’s shit, I just wanted to finish it.
I thoroughly enjoy the Shrek movies. They have comedy and heart and…they’re just good movies.
I love Shrek. And I love how much he loves his children. One of the first questions he asks when he wakes up in Shrek 4 is “Where are my babies?” and the way that line is read absolutely breaks my heart.
It sucks that Shrek has become a very inappropriate joke on the internet cause he is such an emotional character. He’s been judged for so long that he learned to shut everyone out and grew to hate people, but inside, he just wants to be loved.
And I grew up with shrek. I felt his pain deep in my heart. And this is why his and Fiona’s relationship, to me, was so cute. I just love everything about them. They each saw each other as beautiful in every movie despite how they looked.
and the movies gradually got better animation. And I just love how much emotion they show.
look at that tear though
This ismy favorite scene because this is actually the first time we see Shrek cry out of all of the moviesand it really touched my heart. I just love his character and his character development throughout the movies.
Hats off to you, Dreamworks, because I absolutely love these movies no matter what anyone says.
I was trapped. There was no way escaping this time. I knew I was done for. The door, the fragile wooden door, the last thing between me and certain death, was bending dangerously under the weight of about a dozen walkers pushing against it. I felt tears dwelling up in my eyes. I always knew this day would come, at some point each and every one of us would run out of luck no matter how careful we planned our runs or how safe we thought our refuge to be. I just never thought it would end like this. I had hoped for it to be quick, not the crap I found myself in right now, sitting around waiting for the walkers to get me. I listened to their growls as I started to cry.
“So! You’re all probably wondering why I’ve sent mama out, and
gathered you all here.” The bald man was pacing, almost like an army
general, in front of the bots. “Well… it’s recently come to my
attention that your dear, sweet mother… is sad.”
Tiny gasps and ‘oh nos’ and 'not mamas’ were heard.
Tomorrow it’s our first anniversary without Leelah Alcorn! Please, don’t forget her. I didn’t know her when she was alive, but I did know her through Tumblr. I never talked with her, but I think we all know how it’s feeling like you don’t belong. She was in her limit and, finally, in this time a year ago, she broke. Maybe it’s not my business, but I feel like if Leelah was a friend. I’m now a year older than she was, and every night I only can imagine all the pain she was through. When I read about her death, I broke in tears because, you know this feeling when something touch your heart, your soul, and it’s almost like everything that it happens to others, it happens to you? I felt like that. I remember crying my heart out because her and Ronin Shimizu’s death (December 3rd). I didn’t know them but, as a human being, I feel for them. What’s happening in this world that can’t understand and accept their youth? And the same youth that proclaims be “open-minded” just turns to be ignorants when isn’t for something of their convenience. I didn’t know Leelah. I didn’t know Ronin. But they are always in my mind and heart because, for them, the world is slowly changing. Please, keep them in your heart. They will stay alive in us.
PS. I’m sorry for all the persons I’m letting out, Blake Brockington, Melonie Rose, Ash Haffner, and others beautiful brothers and sisters that couldn’t make it to this new year. Really, really sorry. Any of you would be forgotten, at least, I will not forget.
I cry on planes. Every time I leave a place that has changed me. When I forgot my laptop at the security checkpoint of LAX. Over completely non-emotional reruns of CHOPPED. When I start regurgitating my litany of past loves via poetry that need not be written. And, yes, whenever I consider the liminal, unterritoried sky space I’m hurtling through in the quasi-equivalent of a tin can, feeling my minuscule humanity in the gargantuan mouth of the universe. I cry.
If you know me at all, I doubt this surprises you. But did you know that, in 2011, a Virgin Atlantic airline survey found that 55% of travelers reported they experienced “heightened emotions while flying”—and 41% of men surveyed confessed they had “buried themselves in blankets to hide tears in their eyes from other passengers.” Swap blankets for sunglasses, and I’ll confess to having hidden as such many a time. And to loving it.
Read more and get the recipe + a surprise announcement here!
OKAY, I’M PROBABLY THE MOST OVER EMOTIONAL PERSON ON EARTH.
SO WHen I was playing the april fools update for mystic messenger and got to the end chat on zens story-line where seven “lifts the spell” off of his dream. I was having a grand ole’ time. Then seven go’s and says;
“All of us in the rfa cherish each and every day we get to spend with you. We want to spend tomorrow, the day after tomorrow, and all the days to come with you.”
AND LISTEN WHEN I SAY I ACTUALLY STARTED BAWLING MY EYES OUT FOR A SOLID 10 MINUTES AFTER READING IT. I MEAN, I KNOW THEY AREN’T REAL PEOPLE, BUT IN ALL OF MY 18 YEARS OF EXISTENCE. THIS WAS THE MOST MEANINGFUL & SWEETEST THING I’VE EVER HAD SAID TO ME BY ANYONE IN MY LIFE AND I NEEDED TO SHARE MY EMOTIONS.
you ask me if i’m tired, if i’ve been sleeping, and the lie is i got too caught up with working, with studying, with reading. the bags under my eyes are from hours behind a computer screen doing nothing of any importance, that’s all. they didn’t come from tossing and turning in a bed in a room in a cage and jumping at every sound because, secretly, i’m still afraid of the dark.
you ask me why i’ve got a headache and the lie is it’s from too much time spent on my phone, my laptop, the game console. the throbbing at every inch of my brain is just from being part of the internet youth generation, really. it didn’t come from silently screaming at myself to get up, get over it, or from crying myself to fitful slumber full of nightmares i won’t remember anything of but the feelings they gave me because- because it’s always just the feelings, isn’t it? i never know the cause. everything’s the cause.
you ask me if i’ve eaten or if i’m dehydrated or if i’ve been getting out enough and the lie is of course, i’m just tired. the door between me and the rest of the world is only closed because i’m resting or i’ve spent all day doing things and this is the first break i’ve taken. it isn’t to keep away everything that makes me feel like i’m choking on my own breath or drowning in my own tears and it’s definitely not because, most days, i can’t get up to open it.
you ask me why i haven’t called or responded to your text and the lie is i’m sorry, i didn’t get it or i’ve just been so busy. the truth is i did see your text and i did think to call but the second my fingers were hovering over the screen i had to put it down because i didn’t know what to say. the truth is i want to tell you everything i’m feeling but i feel like you’ll either not care or then be the one who doesn’t have any words.
the lie is when you say i can tell you anything because i don’t know how to scream I’M NOTHING.
These are basically my thoughts/actions when I watched the video lol. I was in school when I watched it and like I went from crying to screaming at anyone who tried to touch me.
You had just started the video and Jin’s face appeared. You immediately paused it and ran to the living room where he sat reading a book. You grabbed his face and brought him to your level and glared at him. “Why do you have to be so beautiful!?” You whined.
To this day every time you see the video of Yoongi burning you get tears in your eyes. “I never want you to burn okay?” You said to Yoongi. Yoongi cocks his head to the side, “what?” he glances down at your phone and back to your tear stained face. “Jagi, it’s all fake” He strokes your cheek.
“Why does the chain length fence maze thingy remind me of Exo’s overdose music video” you chuckle and Jhope laughs at your comment.
“I think after this video people will stop calling you dance monster because your rap was amazing” You told Namjoon while waving your phone around. He sat there awkwardly staring at you.
“You know I’m gonna do?” You blurt out. “What?” Jimin replies. “I’m gonna buy you a crap ton of striped shirts because you look hot in them” You told him. “If this is about the epilogue then yes buy me all the striped shirts you want” He laughs.
you had just watched the epilogue video and you were now stroking Taehyung’s hair. “Never change your hair color” You continue to stroke his head. “Umm ok” He replied awkwardly.
“God, why is his voice so amazing?!” You yelled at your laptop screen. “Y/N what’s wrong” Jungkook bursts into your room. “Your voice is what’s wrong” You groan. “I know it’s pretty good right” He smiles confidently. “GOOD?! It’s better than good” You yelled.
I just want to say to you folks that I’ve been having a really rough time sorting out what I want since I graduated, after completely losing myself somewhere along the way, and it’s safe to say that starting and running this blog has been single best and most important thing I could’ve done
It’s been an absolutely glittering beacon of terrible science puns and giant nerd-outs and I would not trade it for anything and even if that sounds lame or WHATEVER I’m really proud of this thing and I’ve met and talked to so many incredible people here and you’re all going to be just exponentially more incredible the more you do and if you’re reading this I LOVE YOU and I’m very emotional right now don’t look at me
darling, do something to let me know that every single word we spoke, every rule we broke, was more than a token of time shaken through clocks and chimes. show me where your heart lies, the reasons that you cry, if only i can close my eyes and dream of you through a thousand miles of memories, trying to reset. but never regret, the one way ticket down a road we can’t forget where to turn or when to stop or which fork to take or not. darling, do something to prove that trust can be unwound and founded, even through the crumbling truths compounded into life-thin lines of wrongs and rights, strung around the strings of kites that’ll fly too far no matter how hard we might reel them back. and none of this will make sense in a year when all of our fears and tears learn how to disappear into shadows that have near perfected the art of waiting, the science of baiting our souls till they’re almost whole, and close enough to hold. none of this will matter then but that’s when it’ll alll come down, round and round, and everything we’ve ever lost can once again be found, even what was once you, what was once me, what was once a path to used-to-be.