and come on the one with the antlers was just on purpose

anonymous asked:

So I have a character who learned how to use a longbow when she was a child to hunt. My question is two-tiered: one, in what ways would that impact her physical development; and two, would this help her if she needed to use a bow against people?

Strong shoulders, strong arms.

In all honesty, the bow is a weapon you build to as a hunter. The first weapon she’d have learned was the sling. More useful for small game, and you can be deadly accurate with it. The David versus Goliath story in the Bible isn’t actually a joke or overblown. A child taking down a grown adult with a rock and a sling is entirely plausible if said adult isn’t wearing a helmet. The sling is the weapon of children everywhere, shepherds and hunters. In many parts of the world, they still use it. It’s also better for small game. Katniss would’ve done better braining the squirrels with a sling rather than a bow, like children do.

As a child, she’d be trained on a child’s training bow and work her way up the different types of bows practicing on a single target. The longbow is a weapon that requires a fairly hefty amount of upper body strength to wield, and she’d have to work and train up into her early teens before she was allowed to use it for hunting. The amount of strength you can draw dictates how far the arrow flies and how deep it penetrates. Depth of penetration is important, as is how far the arrow flies. Both define how close you need to be to your target in order to be successful. Herbivores don’t stand around waiting for a predator to kill them, and carnivores might just decide turnabout is fair play.

So, most of her childhood was spent on dummy duty with her bow as she learned to clean and care for it. Learning to stand, and that’s a whole series of lessons. Learning how to string the bow, learning how to hold it, learning to draw before she was ever allowed to shoot.

What whoever was training her would set her on before that is the other skills, and she’d act as a gopher for them the way all apprentices do. Following behind the older hunter, carrying their equipment, watching them and acting under their direction. You can’t hunt if you can’t find game, and you can’t eat it if you can’t clean it.

Hunting comes with a necessary subset of skills which allow the hunter to work. They don’t just go out into the woods and kill shit then come back. It requires patience. It involves waiting in one place for an animal to come by, sometimes for days. Traps, tracking, reading sign, learning to move through the underbrush without disturbing it, hiding your scent, etc.

Your hunter will catch more food that they eat on the regular with snare traps set for rabbits and other small game than they will with the bigger game like deer. Bigger game takes more investment, more energy, and a lot more luck. There’s also a higher chance of injury.

There are plenty of herbivores that won’t go down quiet, deer included. If your hunter hits wrong and they sense/smell them, there’s always the chance they won’t run and will come right in after the hunter. Animals have “fight or flight” too, and a doe can gore you just as well with her hooves as a buck can with his antlers. Any poor soul chased up a tree by a moose or just gut checked by a horse can tell you, herbivores are assholes. On an unlucky day, they’ll kill you just as well as a carnivore and that’s if you can find them at all.

The chances of managing a “one hit kill” with an animal like a deer are low and, even if you land a killing blow, they’re not just going to fall over dead. You’ve got to be able to follow it, recover the body, and kill it as it lies there bleeding out on the ground if necessary. You’ve also got to have some way to carry it back. Then, there’s the risk you run with whether the herd animals will return to the same place or move somewhere else if too many of their number die. If they do, and they’re your primary source of food, then you’ve got to move with them. Nevermind that there are quite a few animals a bow is simply no good for, like bears and boars. Where you need other tools like dogs and spears.

Hunting is a complicated business, and it doesn’t come with any guarantees.

Now, those skills do translate over well on a certain level to dealing with humans. Though, it’s not the weapon skills so much as the other less flashy ones. Many scouts in medieval armies, for example, were hunters of one sort or another. As were the foragers tasked with feeding them. The ability to tell how many people passed, where they passed, and what they brought with them from the tracks left on the roads or in the hills was a valuable ability. The ability to move through the woods without being seen, to hide your passing, to tell who is breaking trail, and to find their camps was also helpful.

The Ranger class in DnD is built on the hunter. You want a character who has more in common with Aragorn than Katniss. Aragorn uses a bow, but it’s not his only weapon.

The reason for this is that the bow isn’t a great weapon for close quarters. More importantly, it takes time to prepare. You don’t travel with it strung, as that wears out the string. If the string is no longer taut when strung then you can’t fire the bow. You don’t travel with the wood left to the elements. It needs to be wrapped, and packed away. Constantly be oiled to maintain its elasticity/limberness so it can be drawn. A dried bow is a bow you can’t pull, no matter how strong you are. You also can’t get it wet. It’s a weapon which takes a lot of prep in order to be used, a lot of care, a lot of maintenance, more than average, and a lot of hard work.

When you’re in, say, a military or part of a raiding force that knows its attacking then that’s great. Or someone who is on watch for certain periods during the day and will be relieved by another, that also works. Or when you’re sitting alone in the woods waiting for an animal to come by. However, the necessary prep time a bow requires is a lot less helpful when you’re taken by surprise.

By the time you’ve taken it out, unwrapped it, strung it, you’re dead. The enemy was also probably too close for the bow to really be of help anyway. Its a weapon which requires distance. Awesome when you’re pegging people from the ramparts, halfway up a tree, or fifty to a hundred feet off. Less so when they’re standing over you, axe in hand. The traditional role of archers in a military structure is artillery, and not that different from how we use the modern one. Their purpose is bombardment, they soften up the enemy so the vanguard can break their lines and kill them.

There is one kind of single combat the bow is useful for: stalking.

The bow is a silent weapon, and when used in a hunter-stalker mode, can be terrifyingly effective. It’s a stealth weapon, meant for ghosting in and ghosting out as you pick your enemies off. However, this kind of combat requires a proactive mindset and a willingness to get your hands dirty.

It’s also vindictive and, from the perspective of most modern morals, it’s cruel.

Humans are no more lucky than animals when it comes to hunting. The bow is the slow death. No character, no matter their skill level, is going to be guaranteed clean kills. However, what they do get is debilitating blows. An arrow through an arm, a leg, or better a lung, is going to take enemies out of the fight and if they’re not dead yet then potentially another one with them. Harassment is the order of the day. The slow path of carving off opponents, damaging them so they can’t fight back, following as they try to run, before moving in for the kill.

It’s a predatory style of combat, it is (really) just hunting. Hunting humans instead of animals. The terrifying form of combat that haunts so many horror movies. It’s psychological warfare.

However, it’s the kind of combat that takes time, patience, and a strong stomach. It’s up to you to decide if that’s the kind of combat you envisioned for this character to participate in. Or the kind of story you want to tell.

People embrace the Predator and Lara Croft from Tomb Raider (2013), and countless others that have this particular combat style.

It might, however, behoove you to consider coming up with other weapons this character has familiarity with. From knives, to traps, to fishing lines, to other more improvised weapons built on the fly. This character has a range of options within their skillset, and there’s no need to stick to just one.

Also we have a bow tag, and an archery tag for past discussion on this subject.


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OP: Straw Hat’s crew bad habits

 - Luffy always sneaks off at night looking for food: he doesn’t even do it on purpose - he often sleeps-eats after all - which doesn’t make Sanji so happy about it (but he’s prepared, and if you hear a sudden scream, that’s perfectly normal: the trick worked.)

 - Luffy, Usopp, Franky and Chopper always spend their money on “That super amazing cool thing” than save it for actual important stuff.

 - Zoro sleeps everywhere. Everywhere. So basically he’s always in the way. And when the members of the crew stumbles on him, he doesn’t even wake up. The only one to maybe avoid him is Sanji as he’s often carrying food around – and food must not be wasted.

 - Sometimes Zoro gets even lost on the ship and ends up opening a door on the toilets instead of the kitchen where he was thinking he was going to - certainly looking for alcohol. (Fortunately let’s hope no one was currently using the WC.)

 - Sanji can be distracted from time to time, so he flicks his smoke to get the ash off and and it somehow always end up in Zoro’s hair while he’s napping, which absolutely infuriates him, and no matter where Zoro naps and how careful Sanji is, it must be a curse as Zoro always has ashes in his hair at the end of the day.

 - Usopp always makes excuses up when he doesn’t want to do something, which often ends up with Luffy and Chopper doing the chores instead of him and they don’t even see they’re being fooled – so basically someone else from the crew (very often Nami or Zoro) has to remind Usopp of his real duties and dismiss the Captain and the doctor.

 - Franky’s robotic parts make noises at night, especially when he moves in his sleep. Zoro and Luffy don’t notice it, and the others got used to it. However, Usopp didn’t. As Chopper happens to shapeshift, the snipper uses it to his advantage (when he’s in that big huge fluffy shape) to minimize the noises. It doesn’t work and Franky suddenly wakes up thinking he’s being attacked.

 - Franky and Nami’s hair are always left behind in the shower. At first Luffy was persuaded Vivi was back on the ship and hiding, somehow, because of the hair colour. (It was really hard to convince him.)

 - Nami can’t help herself but always bets about anything with everyone. And she, 99% of the time, wins them: so basically the whole crew is more or less indebted to her - especially Zoro – and therefore they have to make new deals with her which is actually maybe not the best idea ever.

 - Chopper often forgets about his antlers when he is in another shape than his usual one, so when he’s crossing a door in a hurry he might scratch the wood of the walls - but Franky eventually got it fixed.

 - Robin is a woman who very often knows more than what she’s showing - she just never says any thing. If the land is on sight, the archeologist won’t say it until someone asks her, if someone lost something and she knows where it is, she won’t say it if she’s not directly asked about it.

 - When Robin is running out of book to read, her interventions get more and more morbid which scares the hell out of them - and how relieved they are to have a new island in sight.

 - Brook plays a lot of tunes and it gives the Thousand Sunny a very nice atmosphere, but it can come to a point where the trip on the sea until next land takes longer than they thought it would, so the musician runs out of new partitions to play and ends up always playing “Binkusu no sake” ten times a day, awakening some of crew’s members homicidal (or skeletonal?) thoughts.

 - As usual, when one devil fruit user falls into the sea, at least two other devil fruits users jump for them. The rest of the crew have a few seconds left to figure out whether to leave them in there once for good - especially that idiot captain - or who’s going this time.

Cat and Mouse

(gif not mine)

Pairing: Sam x Reader (with a little bit of everybody)

Summary: This is sort of a continuation of the request by @cupcakequeen1999 titled Savior, but you could totally read this on its own. 

A/N: I know I’m a terrible person and writer, this took so long to do because I had a massive writer’s block and I know this isn’t exactly what you asked for, but this is the closest thing I could do to your original ask, I really hope you like it! 

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anonymous asked:

Chef Mick meets finicky customer Len

1. Mick Rory ain’t a chef. He runs a diner. A nice, cozy place with a menu ranging from the all-day breakfast special to Mama Rory’s Special Ribs.

2. Len never does seem to find a diner or pub or takeaway joint or even a fancy restaurant that serves something that he really likes. All the food tastes bland.

3. He’s always hungry. Not starving or anything, just - hungry. Just a bit,

4. Mick’s ribs are delicious. Len orders extras. Twice. And goes home that night, for once actually sated.

5. He pretty much becomes a regular. He manages not to stop by every night and he tries not to form any specific patterns - that’s dangerous in his line of work - but he stops by for those ribs regularly. And the burgers. And the Mama Rory’s homemade sausages with secret family ingredients.

6. Of course, the fact that the owner and cook looks as tasty as his food also has something to say.

7. Len sucks at flirting - all puns and awkwardness. Mick just rolls his eyes at him.

8. But Mick has definitely noted his regular customer. They chat, sometimes. One day, Mick even invites Len to come with him back into the walk-in freezer, claiming he could use some help and would Lenny mind?

9. As Mick unlocks the triple locked freezer door Len has a brief flashback to that time as a teenager, when his Dad handed him over to some Family men as a hostage for Lewis’ good behaviour on a job, and apparently not having any better idea what to do with him, they stuck him in the walk-in freezer of the fancy restaurant that was their headquarter.

10. It was dark (why leave lights on for the Snart brat?) and cold, and Len was hungry. He fumbled around in the dark for a bit until finding what he guessed was a ham, then used his pocketknife to slice off a bit. Then he settled down to wait.

11. He’s pretty sure they forgot about him - unless they just left the Snart brat in the freezer all night on purpose. He can’t quite remember - just like he can’t quite remember what happened when somebody finally opened that door.

12. Mick gets the door open, flips a light switch and gestures for Len to step in first.

13. Then he lets the door fall shut behind him. Len hardly notice. This freezer is lit - and there’s most of a human body (sans head and skin and one of the legs and bits of the torso) dangling from a meat hook.

14. When Mick returns about half an hour later (that should be enough for the cold (he turned the temperature further down after locking the freezer back up) to have weakened the obviously-a-cop Lenny who is clearly on to him) with a large, sharp knife.

15. He didn’t expect to find Lenny seemingly unaffected by the cold, blood smeared around his mouth and one arm buried in the chest cavity of the corpse, trying to tug some more ribs free.

16. He really didn’t expect the impressive rack of antlers scraping against the ceiling of his small walk-in freezer.

17. The knife clatters as it falls out of a Mick’s hand when a pair of glowing eyes turn to watch him.

18. Except - except the wendigo named Len looks - sheepish?

19. “Sorry. Though - you did say I could pick just the cut I wanted and you’d cook it for me, but I got a bit impatient.”

20. “Yeah, about that - listen, Lenny, why don’t you come out and I’ll cook you a nice burger? I think we need to have a chat.”

21. Turns out Mick’s a serial killer who gets rid of his evidence Fried Green Tomatoes-style.

One Year | A Gaston Story (Chapter Three)

One Year | A Gaston Story

Gaston (Luke Evans) X OC

Prologue | Chapter One | Chapter Two | Chapter Three

It wasn’t yet sunrise when Anne began stirring restlessly in the unfamiliar bed in Gaston’s Tavern. When she woke, she momentarily forgot her surroundings. Beginning a new day in a home that wasn’t a cottage stuck in the French countryside was surreal and her conversations and encounters from the previous night began to surface. Sifting through the dark, Anne lost her balance while leaning off the bed. She immediately fell onto the floor with a thud.

“Ow,” she groaned. The girl was awfully clumsy, bumping into several corners and objects as she maneuvered her way through the room.

Taking the curtains in one hand, she pulled the fabric aside steadily, as if fearing it may rip, and the streetlights from outside filled the room with faint light. The night was a bit of a blur, she had been exhausted from her journey, but she couldn’t forget the handsome yet uncouth man she met in the tavern downstairs. And there he was, the subject of the painting hanging above the fireplace, with the identical crimson jacket seen in every other painting in the tavern. The man was proudly displaying his gun while sitting upright with perfect posture on a jet-black horse. His eyes were different, though, she noticed. In the painting, the jade coloring was so distracting that its vibrant shade did not seem genuine. In reality, Anne had already noticed that his eyes were darker, an earthy green and brown that swirled together. They concealed certain secrets and powerful emotions. It was clear from the previous night that he was a dispirited man, and so gazing upon this painting that should have conveyed strong feelings of heroism and greatness simply made her feel downhearted.

The room she was staying in was very unkempt, that much was obvious. The painting’s only other companions were hunting trophies from years gone by and a massive deer head mounted on the beige wall. Miscellaneous furniture was positioned randomly throughout the bedroom: a frail, sad-looking writing desk, a rotting wooden closet stained with years of watermarks, and a powder blue cushioned chair in perfect condition, never touched.

As she gently closed the door to the room, her attention shifted to the locked door across the hall: Gaston’s room. It seemed awfully quiet in there. Anne pondered whether or not it would be appropriate to knock on the door but eventually decided against it. She would just venture downstairs to the tavern and wait until Gaston or Lefou spotted her.


Every morning, Gaston would wake before the sunrise to sit alone in the tavern and linger on the past. This approach wasn’t necessarily intended to help him or boost his confidence for that matter (in fact, it did quite the opposite) but Gaston sometimes enjoyed remembering. He didn’t recognize the man in the paintings anymore. He didn’t recognize the man from six months ago. He needed people to love him. He needed people to idolize him. That was Gaston. But after the night he attacked the Beast, everyone shunned him and it was shocking, to him, that they hadn’t kicked him out of the village already. That night in June was now only a blur: Belle dismounting her horse and confirming Maurice’s story about a Beast in the castle, the magic mirror, the mob, his brutal attack on the Beast, falling to his death (or so he thought) from the castle only to be given a death sentence. It was unfair. The tavern’s vibrations of music and laughter were long gone – Silence was all the war hero knew presently. He didn’t know himself without the constant validation and love he needed from his companions.

Anne reached the last step and rounded the corner to discover Gaston, deep in thought, staring at the assemblage of antler decorations on the wall. He looked different…he wasn’t flushed with anger and practically foaming at the mouth…it was a self-reflective moment, so Anne felt awkward about clearing her throat to announce her presence. To her surprise, he didn’t ask her to leave or demand she return to her room, he simply half-grinned and pointed upstairs.

“Was that you earlier?” He asked. It took Anne a few moments to realize he was referring to the thud.

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Endless Autumn - Lucien x sweetheart fic chapter 1/6

My interpretation of the story of Lucien and his doomed sweetheart. I hadn’t got my hands on ACOWAR when I started, so this story is not influenced by any new knowledge about Lucien, the Autumn Court, or his lost love. I even named all his unknown bastard brothers…

A massive huge thank you to @pretendthisiswitty / @rhysand-vs-tamlin for being my beta tester again; you’ve been vital to this story developing!


Find me on AO3

The first time I saw her, I was on a walk through the forest.

The low autumn sun shone brightly through the trees, shards of light piercing through the cool air and warming my skin.

As I walked amongst the weathered barks, the sound of my brothers laughing like fools in the formal gardens mercifully dying down, I stumbled upon her standing beside a reflecting pool. The water was a mirror in which she gazed upon herself, her long dark auburn hair swept over one shoulder, her simple but flattering deep purple dress swaying gently in the breeze.

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Healing Crown

A belated b-day fic for @zmeess
Based on their WONDERFUL and super cool Centaur AU (More specifically: this pic right here)
(Arvid is Nor.  Pridbjørn is Den)

Arvid tried very hard not to headbutt Pridbjørn at sight, especially since the guy was already wounded; but it was damn tempting nonetheless.

“Honestly, I swear you do this on purpose just to annoy me,” Arvid sighed and began looking for the right herbs in his little satchels.

“Huh? No, that’s a ridiculous accusation,” Pridbjørn laughed nervously and scratched at the base of his antlers. “I just got a little unlucky, that’s all!”

“Would this ‘bad luck’ involve a certain half brother of yours perhaps?” Arvid cocked one eyebrow upward and lightly stomped his right back hoof impatiently again the ground. This was the second time in one week that Pridbjørn had asked for help with a wound, and Arvid doubted it would be the last time.

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The many flavours of Hannibal’s kills

Hannibal Classic

Hannibal’s classic MO is to mutilate his victim while still alive, to kill them, eat part of them, then display their body in an artistic tableau.  Examples of this are Jeremy Olmstead (the wound man), and presumably the couple posed as Botticelli’s Primavera.  The precise manner of the mutilation, the killing or the tableau may serve an additional purpose.  For example, Hannibal killed Dr. Nahn in the same way that Abel Gideon was killing his former psychiatrists – with the additional cannibalistic twist – as a way of reclaiming his identity as the Chesapeake Ripper from Gideon.

The victim’s death may serve the purpose of sending a message, and that may even be what prompts a particular murder.  But, at the same time, it doesn’t affect Hannibal’s basic MO.  He enjoys the power he feels mutilating and killing his victims.  He enjoys dining on their flesh.  And then he uses their body to create a work of art or to send a message.  Using their death for a more practical purpose (usually to send a message to Will, or to the FBI in general) adds a garnish to his enjoyment of committing the murder.

But there’s more to Hannibal’s violence than that Chesapeake Ripper persona.

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A Not-so-White Christmas (Tony Stark Holiday One-shot)

Hi, lovelies!! I just love the Holiday season and I am so freaking excited about all the Christmas fics floating around! You are all amazing and I can’t wait to read all of them! I’m still working on finding balance after hiatus so bear with me. 

This fic was written in honor of the birth of the lovely Amberly, aka @marvelingatthewonder . Happy Birthday, my darling!! I hope you have a wonderful day!! I love you! :)

This was also written in tandem with Create Your Own Adventure stories by the other Avengers Trash Tower ladies. You can see the beginning and their fics HERE


A Not-so-White Christmas

Characters: reader x Tony Stark (platonic), Steve (mentioned)

Summary: Reader is stuck at the tower with a cold and is feeling down about the lack of snow, so Tony decides to cheer her up only as he knows how.

Warnings: none. Fluff!!

Word Count: 1810

Tags are at the bottom (TAG LIST IS CLOSED I’M SO SORRY)


Originally posted by iwantcupcakes

The two months preceding Christmas flew by entirely too quickly. You busied yourself, caught up in the holiday spirit as you were shopping, movie watching, and enjoying Pumpkin Spice-flavored everything which then was followed by Peppermint-flavored everything. This was your favorite time of year and you just had a feeling that this was going to be the best Holiday season yet.

But here you found yourself on Christmas Eve in the mostly-empty tower with a gloomy expression upon your face. Not exactly how you had planned it.

The entire city sprawled before you, a spectacular view visible through the floor to ceiling windows of Stark Tower in the heart of New York City. Slumped in a comfy chair in the common room, you propped your head up with a hand under your cheek, a mournful sigh escaping your lips. It was a beautiful view, for certain, but not the one you wanted. Well…not quite.

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gypsy-squirrel-deactivated20150  asked:

Hey! You mentioned cernunnos in your previous post and how you think he isn't really this lord or animals. I am do interested. Can you expand on that please? I have researched him a lot, the wild hunt fascinates me.

Edit: This is gonna be a long. Damned. Post. Brace yourselves.

I sware we have this discussion like once a month. Not that that’s a reflection on you, mind; if it’s a conversation we keep havin’ then it’s a conversation we keep havin’. Bear in mind, though, I’m pretty darned pet-peevy about this subject, so if I come across as irritated it’s nothing personal.

The personification of Cernunnos as the “lord of the animals,” hunting deity, and especially fertility god comes largely from the adoption of Cernunnos into Wicca as the personality or emblem of their ditheist God, which isn’t even slightly fair to the actual historical depictions of Cernunnos. (And that’s leaving alone the fact that a lot of Wiccans tend to view this God as basically an accessory to the Goddess.)

The hunting deity has the most basis in fact, given that wearing antlers is usually a symbol of hunting or the wilderness in a similar context; it’s the implication that that’s all he is, or his central purpose, that is problematic. And it’s easy to see how one might come to the “lord of the animals” conclusion, but it’s a lot more complicated than that. People tend to come to that conclusion by looking exclusively at the Gundestrup Cauldron (which is a rant I’ll save for another day), ignoring his other depictions.

When it comes to animals, the Celts did a lot of depictions, steeped in a lot of symbolism, and when they took the time to do so you can be pretty damn sure that it’s important. People look at the Cauldron and think, “wow, such animals, much animal god,” but, I mean, look: more than one incident of horned cattle, there’s a man riding a fish in the corner, and the eyes of the stag, dog, and god are level which could indicate connection—like, that’s the kind of detail that gets ignored when you just say “animals.” And there’s actually a theory about the interpretation of this too thanks to his other depictions that people tend to ignore, such as, say, the Reims stela (which is my personal favorite depiction, but that’s kind of irrelevant).

In the Reims stela, Cernunnos sits between two essentially symmetrical, parallel halves. On the left (or his right), there is Apollo and a bull; on the right, Mercury and a stag.

Given the symmetry of depiction that’s some pretty clear evidence that he could act as a “mediator,” or a similar role, between these two halves.

In the Reims stela, Apollo and the bull could represent cultivation or civilization, whereas Mercury and the stag would represent the wilderness. Apollo and the bull could represent the material world while Mercury and the stag could represent the otherworld or spiritual world (Mercury being a psychopomp, the stag being a Celtic indicator of spiritual significance). Apollo and the bull could represent life and Mercury and the stag could represent death (which is essentially just a different phrasing of the material/spiritual worlds).

So given this evidence of mediation and balance, we can use that to interpret, say, the Gundestrup Cauldron, in which Cernunnos also sits between symmetrical depictions. On the left (his right), the stag and the torc; on the right, the dog and the horned serpent. This depiction is a bit harder to solve.

The torc, frequently found in other deity depictions, can mean many things, but it’s usually interpreted as meaning divinity (sometimes we use it to determine whether or not a depiction is a god) or nobility. The stag, again, is a symbol of spirituality; in contrast to the dog, however, it can also be associated with life (as stags mythologically tend to avoid capture; killing a white stag can be bad luck; etc.)

On the other side, we have the horned serpent. The serpent in and of itself tends to be a chthonic symbol, but the horned serpent is also evocative of the Slavic duality of Perun and Veles, a thunder god and a subterranean god respectively (I am of course generalizing here). The dog, which also tends to be a Celtic spiritual symbol, is a positive spiritual symbol as the stag is; rather, they tend to be indicative of death, such as the black dog, or the Cwn Annwn who could be associated with the Wild Hunt.

So those are kind of complicated and obtuse, but I think some safe bets would be a balance between the “high” divine (Hellenically, this would be Olympian) and the chthonic, especially given that the horned serpent is evocative of Perun and Veles who share that dichotomy. Which, again, is evocative of a life/death liminal role.

Of course, this is somewhat up for speculation, but this is what I agree with. (Hot damn, this post got away from me. It’s a damned essay.)

My point? Cernunnos is not simply a “lord of the animals.” The first source that I can find that posit this (this one) uses Miranda Green almost exclusively, when she’s been known to share faulty information about Celtic deities/depictions, and also uses the existence of the Hindu god Pashupati as evidence. (That was linked on Wikipedia, by the way. Fuck Wikipedia, check your sources, hell yeah. [puts on sunglasses])

Furthermore there is no evidence that Cernunnos was involved with the Wild Hunt. The best article I have on hand about the Wild Hunt is this one (which is from a folklore perspective and not an archaeological one). There is no evidence attributing Cernunnos to the Wild Hunt except for the fact that Shakespeare depicted him and Herne the Hunter as the same being, which is not true.

The best cohesive paper on Cernunnos’ depictions is this one by Ceisiwr Serith, which does a lot more theorizing on the nature of Cernunnos as a liminal god.

And now that I’ve eaten up your time with this huge response, I’m going to go actually eat. :P

Day Five: Snowmen + Reindeer

Pairing: John Winchester x Reader
Word count: 1,223
Warnings: None.
Challenge: This was written for @waywardlullabies, @deanwinchester-af,and @loveitsallineed‘s 12 Days of Christmas Challenge. Day 5 of 12 Prompts: Snowmen + Reindeer.

The Twelve Days of Christmas Masterlist

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A/N: I finally got out early enough from work to finally post something!!! sorry if this sucks buttt

- once shot you in the forehead with a rubber band from an asparagus bunch and almost cried when he saw the mark he gave you

- no one knows how he even got hired, he just kinda showed up one day

- rumor has it that if you look behind the bounty paper towel stack you’ll find him napping in there

- changed the music over the intercom so much that they have his pic on the door like do not let in

- helps a lot of old ladies and grandmas with taking their bags out to their car, always politely declines dates with their grand daughters and sons

- 50% of his time is spent pushing himself around on stray carts

- gets the bagger named Kyungsoo to reenact the titanic scene with him on one

- he always stacks the tuna into shapes and the manager wants to yell at him but he ends up just letting it happen because it brings in the snobby art kids

- has a little heart shaped sticker that a little girl gave to him shyly once next to his name tag

- has no real concept of personal space, like someone will ask him where the milk is and he’s 1 inch away from your face like I’ll show u!!! Follow meee

- makes the bagger Kyungsoo really red and sweaty but he doesn’t know why

- if you ever find a half eaten Hershey bar, don’t touch it, it’s his, he’s gonna come back for it

- he warms up his hands by placing them on rotisserie chicken and gets yelled at by deli worker Baekhyun

- doesn’t know when to not dance, winds up knocking a lot of coconut waters off the shelf and has to clean them up with super red cheeks

- offers you small little pieces of chicken he gets from the kitchen area and you’re like thanks Jongin but uh, I’m good

- bounces on his knees whenever he sees you and he’s stacking things on the floor like !!! U wanna see my newest tuna stack?

- and you go along with it because how could you not? You know that boy spent at least an hour on it

- his feet hurt sometimes so he sometimes lays down in the aisles and customers have to step over him and they can’t get mad because he smiles and they go blank for like .4 seconds

- “Jongin I’m gonna need you to stop betting Kyungsoo you can eat 5 Popsicles in a minute, look he’s overheating now”

- you bring your own bags when you shop and they have a lot of stickers and patches on them because he insists that he needs to give you some whenever you come

- finds you every time you come, it doesn’t matter if you’re in like, baby formula, there he is

- cashing out at Sehun and he’s giving you attitude until a packet of Kleenex bounces off his head and you both turn around and Jongin’s trying to inconspicuously look at the chips like he didn’t just chuck that shit 50 feet 

- falling into Jongin’s traps to get you to buy all these new foreign foods they get in sometimes and you’re left with all this shit stuffed in your freezer and no idea how to cook it because of him

- volunteering your help whenever you see him with really big boxes and watching him turn red and insist he doesn’t need help while he struggles out the bread aisle

- during Christmas time Jongin always runs around in little reindeer antlers and paints his nose sometimes and you can’t go in that often because you’re afraid you might die

- whenever you come in with other people, he avoids you, but you don’t know why yet

- “Jongin go talk to them, they’re right there dude.”

“But they have other people with them”

- Jongdae in charge of produce threatening to reveal his secret while Jongin chases after him like fuck no get back here i’m sorry I dropped all your cucumbers please no

- slipping on a bag only to have Jongin grab you from behind and hold you for like 5 seconds until your both all red and you leave the store, just getting dinner from Taco Bell

- the store is kind of out of your way but you go there for him

- Jongin usually has tons of shit to do but he leaves it all whenever you come through the doors while Minseok stares at him like forreal? You gon leave my ass to stock all this goddamn tuna alone?

- Joonmyeon the manager always gives you coupons and you’re really happy but then you see Jongin giving you the death stare from behind the Starbucks and you’re like anyways…free milk..50% of soda….

- Jongin calling you over every time there’s a new shipment of lobsters so you can both stare at them through the glass

- having to console Jongin whenever someone buys a lobster or requests to have it butchered, he’s sad about it

- “he was my favorite one,”

- But you don’t tell him that his favorite one was the one with the yellow rubber bands because your pretty sure your mom came in and bought that one

- hangs around the cookie aisle too damn much and asks if he can have your number so

“Uh…I can uh, let you know w-when we uh, have more p-pecan sandies???”

- you give it to him, but hoping he’ll text you about more than pecan sandies

- he does, and it’s about bread, but it’s fine because he gave you a reason to come to the store for the 4th time that week  

- sometimes he stares at you a little too long and the old lady asking him questions knocks over his tuna stack on purpose

- “hey y/n, you want some discount tuna?”

- Kyungsoo bags your groceries terribly but you can’t figure out why yet

- Yixing in charge of the bakery almost let’s it slip one day that Jongin liked you, before you got there and looked up from your cupcake to see Jongin pulling him into the stock room like it’s fine y/n! I’ll be right back!!!!

- you wait in the long lines with Jongin instead of self checkout even though you have like 2 items, because you don’t mind and he wants you to stay

- Sehun rolling his eyes whenever you both would run through the aisles together almost crashing stands because Jongin would want to show you these cool new cake designs

- Jongin sometimes calls you, and he slowly stops talking about his lobsters and shit

- sometimes you text him, and you always find yourself smiling incredibly hard whenever his message pops up

- “jeez y/n, why don’t you just work here? You never leave anyways”

- another Kleenex packet at Sehun’s head

- saves the best lettuce heads for you, and the prettiest strawberries

- writes your name on his paperwork sometimes and throws it 60 feet into the air whenever you come around bc holy shit when did you get here????

- the grocery store is really far, and cold sometimes, and opens at the oddest hours, but you still come everyday, and Jongin still talks about his tuna stacks, and you both wait for when the other will finally say the one thing you both can’t, ( along with the rest of the goddamn store ) but for now, Jongin showing you foreign food and decorating the tuna aisle for you is fine enough :-)

anonymous asked:

50- Vax/Gilmore pre-breakup

I will always love you, or anyway I will always have loved you now. (And you will always be someone who was beautiful, once.)

this definitely does not fit the prompt but i tried hwjkfdnasf

As cliché as it might sound, you remember the first time you saw him as if it was yesterday.

It was a slow day, the one or two customers in the shop browsing idly through your not-insignificant shelves for the past hour or so when they entered. The bell above your door chimed incessantly as eight of the most colorful personalities in all of Exandria stepped through. The bright red dragonborn (how curious. not many of them ever really stepped outside of Draconia, and your merchant’s eye noticed the intricate brocade trim that adorned the dragonborn’s robes with some interest) and the tall woman with antlers (antlers) made a beeline for the shelves stocked with ingredients. The two gnomes and… was that an actual goliath behind them? meandered about in idle curiosity, occasionally picking things up (and almost breaking them, in the goliath’s case) as they did. The tall, bespectacled fellow somewhat awkwardly shuffled his way towards the shelves with tomes on the more obscure histories, thumbing his way through the dusty pages with rapidly growing interest (Sherri was already making her way towards him, fiery determination in her eyes. We are not a library!)

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anonymous asked:

What is the point of animals like crane flies, where once they reach their adult phase their purpose is to lay eggs then die? They don't even have mouths (apparently) so. Their life cycle just seems so irrelevant like why would evolution do that? (Please no crane fly pics if u get to answering this question, I hate them very much D:) (sorry if this is phrased strangely)

Kind of an interesting question here, though you must be careful with words like ‘purpose’ when describing the way animals have evolved- there’s no purpose about it, it’s literally what randomly came together and worked.

The life cycle of the crane fly only seems confusing if you look at it from a human standpoint. Certainly it seems to us that the most proper life cycle includes a short nonreproductive juvenile period and a much longer reproductive-capable adult period. This, after all, is how most the lives of most vertebrates are structured. For example, a dog lives perhaps an average of twelve years, and only spends about six months of that time growing to sexual maturity.

And it does confer advantages from an evolutionary standpoint: having most of your life available to find mates seems like a pretty good way to maximize the number of offspring you produce. Here’s a really lazy timeline of that strategy, which in scientific terms is called an iteoparous lifestyle:

But there’s a danger in assuming that the juvenile period is wasted time, which it isn’t- otherwise it wouldn’t exist. Evolution rewards species that can successfully propagate themselves, and the timing of the nonreproductive period hinges on this. You see, there’s a slight problem with being ~READY TO BONE~ 24/7. Sexual organs, sexual secretions, and sexual behavior are all extraordinarily expensive. I’m not just talking about being sweaty and tired after a netflix and chill marathon. I’m talking about the biological costs incurred by producing eggs, sperm, secondary sex characteristics like giant antlers on deer and gaudy tails on peacocks, building nests for eggs, competing for opposite-sex attention and fighting off other suitors, and heck, even finding the dang object of your attraction. Think about how successful dating sites are, for goodness’ sake. In the US alone, about $80 million each year gets spent by horny people on dates.

Knowing how expensive all this can get, perhaps now it’s less surprising that some species want to make sure their offspring are as prepared as possible before they’re thrust into the Lust Pit. This may mean that they have proportionally longer juvenile periods than reproductive periods- however, when Fuck Time comes, they have a much better chance of finding a partner than you do on OkCupid because the entire species has synchronized their genitalia to develop at the same time. They may not even eat or sleep- they spend their last few weeks, days, or hours in a furious haze of lovemaking. Sometimes until they literally fall apart, in the case of the antechinus, a little marsupial that has such furious sex that he’ll lose all his hair and bleed internally (and then die). Which you wouldn’t expect when you see one:

This type of get-fucked-or-die-trying lifestyle is called semelparity, in contrast to our own iteroparity. Here’s another lazy timeline of that:

Semelparous animals sync up their breeding cycles to maximize their chances of finding a mate. This means it’d be pointlessly expensive to be reproductively primed during the off-season. Instead, they focus on preparation: growing as large and strong as they can so that when the time comes, they have the best chance possible. One of the best examples of this is the cicada, which is likely the longest-living insect- some species live up to 17 years. However, of those 17 years, only 2-4 weeks are spent as sexually mature adults. Emerging en masse after such a long absence not only makes it much easier to find a mate, it also overwhelms potential predators. Yes, cicadas are delicious, but you can only eat so many in two weeks compared to how many you could eat if they spent all seventeen years not buried deep underground.

Periodical cicadas are an extreme example, but many other animals have similar strategies. Calling something short-lived a “mayfly” refers to the fact that the sexually mature form is extraordinarily short-lived- in one species, it lives for less than five minutes. However, it’s often forgotten that this only refers to the adult form; the larvae will live possibly two years in rivers or streams.

It’s not just invertebrates that practice extreme semelparity. I already mentioned the little antechinus- the males of that species, by the way, live less than a year, while the females live for two years and generally die after weaning their first litter. Pacific salmon are another familiar semelparous species, which spend up to five years in the ocean before returning to freshwater to spawn and die within the span of a few days.

Perhaps the most extreme example of a semelparous vertebrate that I know of is Labord’s chameleon. The eggs of this species take roughly 9 months to incubate before hatching. After hatching, the juveniles reach sexual maturity at about two months old- and die another two months later. That’s right: this species of chameleon spends more time in an egg than it does in the outside world. Not only that, but because the mating takes place seasonally, there are long periods of time in which no adult individuals of the species exist. All of them are encased in eggs- silently growing, and preparing for the pinnacle of their lives: the Great Fuckening.

Godspeed, little one.

Further reading:

Dobson, F. S. (2013). Live fast, die young, and win the sperm competition. Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences, 110(44), 17610-17611.

Karsten, K. B., Andriamandimbiarisoa, L. N., Fox, S. F., & Raxworthy, C. J. (2008). A unique life history among tetrapods: an annual chameleon living mostly as an egg. Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences, 105(26), 8980-8984.

Koenig, W. D., & Liebhold, A. M. (2013). Avian predation pressure as a potential driver of periodical cicada cycle length. The American Naturalist, 181(1), 145-149.

Williams, K. S., Smith, K. G., & Stephen, F. M. (1993). Emergence of 13-Yr periodical cicadas (Cicadidae: Magicicada): phenology, mortality, and predators satiation. Ecology, 1143-1152.

Young, T. P. (2010). Semelparity and iteroparity. Nat Educ Knowl, 3(2).


As someone who loves and is utterly fascinated undead, necromancy and everything involving it I of course have ideas for a pokemon type for Undead. 
This is the fakemon legendary ideas i’ve had and stuff, as well as zombie pokemon info. Is all written under this little readmore here

If you can take the time please read it trought!
If you would like to use any ideas please ask me first!

I wouldnt mind feedback on this either as so far its mostly ideas!

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The One with the Snowman

Title:  The One with the Snowman

Summary: Christmas has become just another day for Dean, not worth celebrating. Donna, on the other hand, loves Christmas. Can she instill him with the Holiday Spirit by Christmas Day?

12 Days of Dean and Donna: A Christmas Story

Author:  Dean’s Dirty Little Secret

Characters:  Dean Winchester x Donna Hanscum

Word Count:  1662

Warnings: Some language

Author’s Notes: Written for the 12 Days of Christmas Challenge from @waywardlullabies. Day 5 of 12 Days of Christmas, Prompt: Snowmen + Reindeer

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Hannibal Rewatch: 1x11

Season 1, Episode 11: “Rôti”

**Warning: rewatch blogging, written with knowledge of the full series

“Rôti” changed me.

I remember staring into the dark after I watched this episode, heart pounding from having just leaped onto my bed from halfway across my room in case I was about to be face-attacked by someone hiding underneath it, and feeling like I was going mad. How did this happen to me?? I wondered, overwhelmed, and I would try to pinpoint it and I couldn’t and then another wave of delirium would sweep over me. Not for the first time, and certainly not for the last, I considered how the sea that Will was in was where I was as well. I screamed silently into my pillow.

The fourth wall was gone, eaten up some time before. The madness was mine too, and frankly: I loved it.


So I’m very dreading and desperate rewatching this one, but HELLO CHILTS. Figuring out rn why it was that I hadn’t cared about Dr. Chilton’s fate in this episode, and it’s because this is only the second time we’d seen him! Felt like more, actually — nicely done, as always, Mr. Esparza.

“If only I’d been more curious about the common mind.”

Oh my god, delivered with all the tragic irony of the hero stating his fatal flaw, gazing ~majestically~ out into the snow like “ah yes, my tragedy: being Too Attuned to the Rarified” — beautiful. I have never before seen a side character who more visibly believes himself to be the central protagonist.

Hannibal: “You were trying too hard, Frederick.” Chilton is a canonical try-hard, #txt it

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                 Everything I Built Burned Down Yesterday

An incredibly overdue Gamzee fanmix (Repost)

Saltkin- Purity Ring // Infinitesimal- Mother Mother // Over And Over- Chris Garneau // Pierrot The Clown- Placebo // This Is The Last Time- The National // I don’t Want Love- The Antlers // Kefka- Nobuo Uematsu // Raw And Awake- Chris Garneau // When Were You Happy(And How Long Has That Been)- Laura Marling // All Alone- Gorillaz // Eet- Regina Spektor // 9-5ers Anthem- Aesop Rock // Long Hard Times To Come- Gangstagrass // Angels And Airwaves- Angel Haze // Yellow flicker Beat- Lorde // I- Kendrick Lamar

Significant Lyrics Beneath The Cut (LONG)

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Happy holidays, escapism-artist! I have interpreted “literature” and “artifact hunting” and “AU” extremely broadly here (“S5 never happened” is, however, the literal truth)… also, it’s not the shortest of stories. If you prefer more-succinct holiday madness, you might check out yesterday’s Visit. Or I will happily write you something else; just ask. Anyway, without further ado, let the merriment, or whatever, commence!


Myka was finding it extremely difficult to concentrate on her book, for pieces of her hair were being wrapped around a finger (not her own) and tugged with some energy. “You are annoying me,” she said to her traveling companion.

“No, I’m attempting to determine the tensile strength of each curl in your hair.”

“I’m pretty sure you’re annoying me.”

“Then I’m multitasking,” Helena announced.

“I don’t think you understand what that word means. Didn’t you bring a book?”

“Of course I did. But reading seems far less interesting right now than attempting to determine the tensile strength of each curl in your hair.” As if to emphasize her interest, she began using both hands.

And so Myka was, at least momentarily, pleased when her phone rang.

Helena admonished, “I told you to turn that off. We are Christmas-vacationing in the tropics.”

“We are not Christmas-vacationing in the tropics yet. We are sitting in the airport in Sioux Falls, I am trying to read, and you are annoying the living daylights out of me.” She answered the phone. “What’s up, Steve?”

In response, she heard a slightly panicked, “Are you on the plane yet? Please tell me you’re not actually on the plane yet.”


“Well…” And what tumbled out was a difficult-to-follow tale—made even more difficult to follow by the fact that Helena plastered her face next to Myka’s so she could hear too, and that was extremely distracting—about Pete and Claudia having seemingly disappeared from their snag-and-bag mission, and Mrs. Frederic having done a similar vanishing act. “She was standing right here talking to me about shelving artifacts, and then she looked around and said, ‘Tomorrow is Christmas! It’s practically here!’ And then, poof!”

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