and be real

Jimin : jungkookie what would you do on our comeback?
Jungkook : working out baby i need to work out
Jimin : …. will you take off your shirt?
Jungkook : no .. Unless you want me to?*smirk*
Jimin : well … It will be a waste … Not to take off your shirt *looking at his feet*
Jungkook : hmm and what will i get in return ?
Jimin : *cheeks burning* Me
Jungkook : then taking of my pants would-
Jimin : *hitting him on the chest*
Jin : no one takes off anything you two dirty ppl ! Im watching YOU!

This.

This panel gets to me.

I’ve heard some people saying that our!Ciel was neglected or abused by his family, and while I don’t think that’s true (Vincent and Rachel seemed to care for both the twins from what we’ve seen) I think there was a definite power imbalance between real!Ciel and our!Ciel. I mean ‘I won’t be angry with you’? That sounds like something you say to a child, not someone the same age. 

His facial expression shows this too- he’s smirking, like he’s mildly interested but sees himself as holding the upper hand. He’s completely calm. The only time he shows any anger is when he turns to Sebastian. 

It would make sense for him to be angry at our!Ciel too, but he isn’t, and it doesn’t feel like it’s out of love. He genuinely doesn’t believe that our!Ciel had any agency in the matter because he looks down on him (literally, in this scene) and he always has done.

I’m not saying that’s necessarily a bad thing. He was definitely overprotective of our!Ciel, who was weak and vulnerable compared to him, so it would make sense for him to take on a leading position in their relationship. The protector, so to speak. But because of this he doesn’t see our!Ciel as a person on the same level as him. We’ve seen throughout the manga that our!Ciel is capable of doing things by himself, and he’s grown more independent, but real!Ciel returns and it immediately leaves him terrified and lost for words. Even when real!Ciel says things so condescending that I doubt our!Ciel would let anyone else get away with it, he says nothing. 

It’s not just the fact that he’s being found out here that terrifies him, it’s how real!Ciel is immediately holding power over him, and he can’t fight back because even he views himself as the inferior of the two. That’s probably part of the reason why he took his brother’s name and identity on, in the hope of being seen as the superior one for once. And now that real!Ciel has returned this is all crumbling around him. He’ll have to back to being the sickly little brother, the one who will never inherit a title and isn’t as important, and that terrifies him. 

Empty Gold (Halsey)
Empty Gold (Halsey)

In case you thought differently, I’m still on a massive fucking Halsey kick

Cat Update!

The foster cat is going to be staying an extra month, which is fine, because she is a cute weirdo and we like her. However, I am a little antsy to adopt.

We got approved for adoption by the SPCA! I was anxious about this because I have never done a shelter adoption myself (I got Kitty from a kid at school when I was in 10th grade, all other cats we had were adopted by my mom). The calico baby who soft-pawed my face had a few applications already, so I decided not to pursue her. The cat manager (CAT MANAGER IS A REAL JOB) also explained that very few shelter cats can be adopted out to families with children, whereas my wife and I are better suited to the hissy grumpies. 

Which brings me to Emily. She had been at the shelter back in the winter, and I was kind of bummed to see she was still there last week. I had it in my mind that the calico would likely be adopted very quickly because she was so cute and had a sparkling personality, but no matter what happened with her, I would also ask about Emily. 

The deal is: Emily has been at the shelter the longest, about 8 months or so. She’s 9 years old, a tuxedo, kind of chubby, and a little standoffish. She belonged to a priest and was surrendered when he died. There’s nothing wrong with her, she’s just kind of a hard luck case who falls in that shitty middle ground between adorable sweet kitten and just fucked up enough to elicit feelings of sympathy. The cat manager says that if she’s still there when the foster cat goes home to her family, Emily is ours. Emily didn’t really warm to us during the meet and greet, but I feel like she at least deserves a home where she can just be Emily.  Fingers crossed!