and are desperate enough to do this kind of work

2

BK: During Aang and Zuko’s heyday, the ability to bend lightning was an incredibly rare skill usually reserved for the inner circles of Fire Nation royalty and high-ranking military officers. Now, in the thick of the Avatar world’s own Industrial Age, we see that this skill is, while not widespread, common enough that it is practiced by blue-collar workers changing up massive batteries in the city’s power plants. This kind of work is incredibly taxing on a person’s chi reserves; that’s why the plant bosses tend to get desperate, strapping young men like Mako to sign up for the grueling task. Mako designs by Jin-Sun Kim and Ki-Hyun Ryu. Color by Sylvia Filcak-Blackwolf. Background design by Eun-Sang Yang. Painting by Emily Tetri. 

[x]

sensory desperate

I’ve been half-looking for a term for that autism feel when I’m too tired and I feel desperate for sensory stimulation. Like, I feel bored and I want to turn the music up incredibly loud and watch TV and eat all the sweets and a million other things, ideally all at once.

It’s not only when I’m too tired; I had a temp job earlier this year in a small office that was very quiet, had white noise from an air filter going on top of that, and didn’t have enough for me to do, and didn’t want me to do anything to amuse myself because I was sitting at the front desk.

At the end of my first week or so, I got off work so desperate for some kind of sensory input that I was beating my forearms against the steering wheel to get enough pressure, with the old-school hip-hop station turned up all the way.

After that, I started wearing my weighted vest underneath a sweater and chewing a lot of gum at work, and that helped. I felt starved of input. I actually googled “sensory starvation” and found out that this is a known thing, that people who work with autistic kids know that not having enough sensory input causes meltdowns.

But “sensory starvation” doesn’t quite do it for me. It describes the cause instead of the feeling.

After seeing Star Wars last night*, @anniegst and I only got like 4 hours of sleep. So she was talking about this feel, and I was like, yeah when I’m too tired I get sensory desperate. And then I was like, eureka!

So I offer this term to you other neurodiverse people, especially autistics. (Noun form: “sensory desperation,” as in, “that teacher is so boring they give me sensory desperation.”)

(And if you’re neurotypical and you’re like “but I want to use that word, I get that too!” at least consider the possibility that you might be autistic.)

* (I fucking love the Bay Area. Yes we got to see Star Wars the night before it was officially released! I LOVE IT. FIVE STARS. And my autistic 13 year old friend, whose special interest is video editing, got to see it the day before THAT, at a special screening for Industrial Light & Magic. that boy has connections I don’t even understand, someday his name will be up on that screen.)

For real though, those “straight women need to try women out” posts are so fucking annoying and they just remind me of when people are all “You don’t know if you’re gay unless you try to date guys” towards lesbians. (And it makes you look like the very Nice Guys you all seem to complain about)

And it makes us gay/bi/pan women look desperate enough to invalidate someone’s sexuality just so we can feel better about crushing on that person.

Like I get that it hurts when your crush is unrequited, especially when their sexuality doesn’t match with yours. However, if you really do care for them, you’d let them feel what they feel and date who they want and maybe try to move on and find someone whose sexuality DOES match with yours AND returns your feelings.

I’m kind of legitimately fearing for people on this site who don’t know how relationships work at all.

i wouldn’t say he’s my better half

because we’re both two whole people

and i wouldn’t say he completes me

because i myself am complete

but i will say that my heart really just aches when i miss him. i literally, physically feel it. i can feel my heart pulling me, back to new york, back to him. i’m ok out here. i’m doing well in school, i love my job, i’m enjoying time with friends. but it’s nothing compared to when we’re together. like, legit life is great now. but it’s a different kind of great when i’m with him. a better kind of great.

that’s the only way i can explain it. i’m not in desperate need of him. but at this point we’re spiritually connected and emotionally invested. and naturally, my heart seeks his. and we do a great job of working through being in a ldr and growing together and developing intimacy despite challenges. but it’s never enough. it never compares to us being together

View from Clingman’s Dome (Parking Lot) 05 – Great Smoky Mountains National Park near Cherokee, NC, September 1, 2014

Some people cannot be cooperative.

Some people cannot be compassionate.

Some people cannot be kind.

Some people cannot be loving.

Some people cannot be who they are desperately needed to be.

Some people cannot be mature enough to help anyone with her, with his, life.

These people help us with our life by not helping us with our life.

They force us to grow up, square up with the facts, stand up and do what needs to be done about them, like it or not.

We have to stop expecting things to be different than they are,

And do what we can with them as they are,

With what we have to work with,

In the time left for living.

My Lady Love || lady-marion-loxley

     She didn’t have a clue what she was doing, not really, she was just sort of doing as she was told. She had spent her life doing that, just doing what other people told her to do, but she honestly preferred this to what she was coming from. Though she had never run a bath for someone else before, and she had never scrubbed a floor before, or polished shoes or fed horses-all things she was expected to do now. She had been on her own for probably two weeks before she found the home of Lady Marion and Sir Robin, though she had never heard anything about the latter or even met the former. 

     She had wandered to the small town of Nottingham, tired and hungry for reasons she never revealed. But a man of the church was kind enough to give her water and bread, promising to find her work so she may start a new life there-something she desperately wanted. Any life was better than the one she was coming from. She had slept in the church for two simple nights before a woman came from an estate from the other side of the village to offer her a job as a maid in a local house hold. She was the head maid in a house hold run by a woman whose husband was away in King Richard’s war, a respectable woman who took care of his father. The job came with a place to sleep and food to eat so she was grateful and took it right away.

     That was how she ended up here, carrying a large bucket of boiling water across the house to fill up the master’s father’s bath. And that was when it happened, she bumped slightly against the giant bucket she had in her hands, causing some to slosh out onto the floor and her foot to slip. She gasped, feeling like everything was suddenly moving in slow motion as she tried to catch her balance, already knowing she would fail, shutting her eyes as she whimpered at the fear of the burns she would have. 

@lady-marion-loxley

6

Hey there!  I’m doing emergency commissions, since it seems like I’m going to have to find somewhere to live apart from the current roommates!
Unfortunately that’s an expensive venture, and I barely don’t even make enough to pay for groceries as is.

Prices will range from $15 to $40, depending on level of detail and color complexity, with the high detail/full color option being most expensive, and black & white being the cheapest.  I accept payment through paypal, or if you’re feeling kind and generous you can donate.

I will do fanart, personal portraits, simple t shirt/sticker designs, you name it.
Feel free to check my art blog for more examples of what I can do.

If interested, please contact me at inkbombersm@gmail.com and we can plan!

i think that’s the reason this week’s tgw worked so well, actually, and why it managed to be more emotionally intense and less emotionally manipulative than almost any other television death ever; because so much of the episode was about the world going on without will, and no matter how much alicia and diane and kalinda (and even fucking david lee for a millisecond) wanted it to stop and wait for them, they had to keep swimming

kalinda trying to rewind time and desperately searching for some kind of catharsis, kalinda who moves at the speed of light, kalinda who barreled past cops and into the line of fire knowing it was too late because what if she got there one second early enough to make a difference, kalinda who somehow feels she should have prevented it from happening, kalinda furious, kalinda in pain she thought she’d learned to bury

diane keeping the ship afloat without her co-captain, diane letting actual mephistophiles david lee do what needed to be done and touch the work that would burn her, diane steely-eyed and needing to be both lockhart and gardner, diane taking will into herself and making him a part of her, diane doing ‘what will would have done’, diane widowed

alicia clinging to any hope of meaning, alicia searching for narrative purpose in the senseless, alicia wishing for just a little more time, alicia with things unsaid and unknown, alicia looking at the gate that closed on the road not traveled and regretting, alicia who had moved on suddenly confronted with the absoluteness of changing her mind and wondering, alicia without the relationship that had shaped her professional and personal life for five years, alicia who had moved on and moved up with the ladder kicked out from under her

all three of them were suddenly thrown into a tailspin and even though everyone in their world was knocked over with them, the rest of the world kept going, and they’re gonna get carried along whether they want to or not (and i think it was very pointed that neither alicia nor diane was willing to cry openly or without control, and kalinda didn’t allow herself that release at all)– the sun is still out and the birds are still flying, people die every minute, and even a meaningless and tragic loss doesn’t stop the earth from moving

anonymous asked:

So in a post you mentioned that you see a therapist, do you think that helps you? Like does seeing a therapist help sort out your feelings or whatever? I really think I need to see one, even my family has been telling me I should. I just don't know what it's like and if it actually helps.

i don’t know, man. it’s kind of complicated. i desperately want to not be depressed anymore and therapy is supposed to help, and i didn’t want to be honest enough about how depressed i actually am in order to go see a psychiatrist and get medicated, even though i think what i really want is meds (how very millennial of me, i know, but dammit so WHAT if i really DO want to pop a pill and get a quick fix? sue me. also i’m AWARE that meds don’t really work like that but it’d be nice to TRY).

i do think it helps, yeah. i don’t really feel any less depressed (but i mean, nobody cures depression by TALKING, so) but she’s really good at asking very pointed questions that eventually back me into a corner so i have to really think about the things in my life that are making me so miserable, bc on my own i won’t think about them, and certainly i won’t TALK to anyone about them. and then because i’ve admitted something that i wouldn’t usually admit, even to myself, she can say something that i didn’t know i needed to hear. which is nice. i’ll admit.

i would certainly recommend trying it, i mean, really, there’s probably nothing you’ve got to lose—i mean, i’ve heard of people who think therapy is useless, but i don’t know anyone who is WORSE than they were before therapy, so if your parents are offering then at least give it a go!