and an actual pair of heels

this shot of the joker pulling up his pants leg seems to imply that the white part of his feet is actually just bare skin, not fabric spats over a pair of dress shoes, as i had always assumed?? which means that the animated series joker has actually been wearing, like, kitten heeled pumps this entire time

Ever needed to hear about mad dad birds with enormous feet? Try THESE on for size:

What’s that you say? These are clearly the feet of a dinosaur, not a bird? WHY NOT BOTH?

This is Australia’s very own dinosaur, the second-largest bird in the world, the emu. Say hi!

They roam around Australia making ‘wonk-wonk’ noises under their breath and glaring at everything. And the dads take care of the babies! They sit on the eggs…

They look after the tiny stripey adorable things….

They look after the less tiny less adorable things…

And they even look after the great big menacing things that are almost as big as they are.

But here’s the catch. All emus look pretty much alike. Especially when you are a tiny stripey adorable thing. All you can see of your dad is is great big dinosaur feet (see picture #1). So there is one very unrealistic thing about all the adorable terrifying dinosaur family photos above:

I have never seen an emu family in the wild where all the babies are the same size.

Here is the reason!

Emu dad and his emu babies are roaming about wonking and glaring at everyone. Suddenly emu dad sees another emu dad! A threat!

Emu dads do some display threats with dancing and bouncing and fluffing and… look, it’s very serious business, okay?

If this does not work to see off one emu they might progress to actual fighting.

Oops, sorry, you wanted the dignified version. Here, have some ART:


Either way, this encounter will end up with one or both adult emus zooming away as fast as he can run. This is very fast.

This is the other thing they do besides wonking and glaring, by the way. They run. Fear the running emu.

Anyway, this leaves all the tiny and medium-sized and semi-large stripey things milling around making confused tiny “cheep? wonk?” noises and basically just following whichever pair of large feet they can find.


And so mostly when you see a male emu with a gaggle of youngsters at heel, they are all different sizes. Who knows whose they are? Not him! But he’s going to look after them anyway.

Fear him.


Author: @sincerelystiles
Pairing: Stiles x Reader
Word Count: 2,980

Warnings: nsfw

A/N: happy late v-day bitches ;)
requested by @ephemeral-stilinski

Originally posted by everyonelovescousingmiguel

My lips press against his neck, sucking deliciously against the soft skin as he bunches up the back of my shirt in his fists, his head rolling back as he lets out a strangled mewl. “Babe come on, I gotta go.” He fights back although the weakness of his voice honestly said otherwise. “Stay the night, I can make it worth your while.” I whisper seductively, nipping his ear before smearing the tip of my nose down his neck, planting a chaste kiss against the new, purple bruise.

“Y/N, I can’t. I promised Scott I’d help with trying to catch the next Chimera.” I sigh at his words, rolling off him and onto the other side of the bed as he climbs out of it. As he wanders around the room to collect his things, I take the time to lay back and enjoy the view of his of his muscular back, adoring the way his muscles moved. That was until, he found his shirt.

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This Is War [5]
Request: jealous!bucky where he tries to outdo the guy in everything and its just ridiculous and funny (Again, wasn’t sure if this was an ACTUAL request, but I thought it would be fun as one :p)

Bucky Barnes X Reader

Word Count: 1154

Warnings: Alcohol consumption, some language

A/N: I feel like this part is also a little boring, but I gotta move stuff along somehow! Hopefully y’all enjoy it! Thank you for reading!! Feedback is always appreciated :)

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Notice Anything? (Sherlock Holmes X Reader)

Requested: No 

Word Count: 2 189

A/N: Yay I am finally back with another fanfic! I am so sorry for the very long wait, school had been keeping me very busy. This is my first Sherlock imagine and I am starting to get used to the different characters’ personalities. Again, sorry for the wait and I hope you enjoy!


“You like her.” John states as soon as she leaves the flat, turning to look Sherlock in the eyes. Sherlock turns away quickly, his brown curls bouncing madly as he stood up from his chair.

“That is absurd, John. I see that spending time with me hasn’t made you any less of an idiot.” he proceeds to pace around the small flat, his eyes occasionally wandering to where her figure stood just moments ago. He could still feel the essence of her presence lingering. He wished that she was still standing there.

“Oh, stop denying it, Sherlock. I know a person with feelings when I see one, though I can’t say the same for you.” John replies cockily with a chuckle, completely ignoring Sherlock’s attempt at shutting him up.

“I don’t have feelings!” Sherlock snaps, his teeth bared in a scowl. “I can’t like her, I can’t have feelings-”

“Oh don’t be silly Sherlock, you’re human…I think. Of course you have feelings-”

“…Because she’s with someone else.”

John’s eyes widen and his mouth hangs agape as Sherlock falls back into his chair, putting his head in his hands. John lets the silence sink in, still processing the fact that the emotionless consulting detective before him did in fact like (Y/N).

It was true that (Y/N) was already in a relationship, one that neither Sherlock nor John approved of. It was rather one-sided, her boyfriend never really cared for her and always relied on her to do things for him when he’d never offer anything in return. Nevertheless, she insisted that they loved each other and that it was meant to be. She had just visited Baker Street to hang out with John and Sherlock before celebrating her one year anniversary with the guy and was now getting ready for her big night.

“Sherlock, I’m so sorry.” John finally murmurs, sitting across from him in his chair. The detective looked miserable and John realized with a pang that Sherlock was only truly happy when his favourite people were in the room. John Watson is one of course, but (Y/N) was also a key to filling the missing pieces of the detective’s heart.

“Why is it that people say sorry when it is not even their fault?” Sherlock mutters, standing up and grabbing his long black coat. “I don’t understand why innocent people blame it on themselves when there are others who are guilty.”

He shrugs his coat on and ties his scarf so tightly around his neck that John was afraid that he might choke himself. He heads down the stairs, his shoes echoing every time he took a step.

“Sherlock! Where are you going?” John asks suddenly, though he already knew the answer.

“I’m going out for a walk, isn’t it obvious?” he calls, his voice faint. John hears the black door slam shut and sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose.

It was very obvious where he was actually going.


(Y/N) stood in front of the fancy restaurant, shivering from the cold. They had promised to meet there 30 minutes ago, but to no avail had he arrived. Wearing nothing but a sheer sleeved knee length dress and a rather painful pair of heels, she waited, shuffling from foot to foot in attempts to warm up

Sherlock arrived momentarily and takes a sharp intake of breath when he saw her. She had definitely glammed up for the occasion, ditching the ponytail and letting her hair fall in loose curls around her shoulders. She had also traded her comfy flats for some killer heels, giving the already confident girl a boost in demeanour. Her dress hugged her body perfectly, accentuating her curves. She truly was beautiful, with or without fancy attire. Sherlock gulped as he approached her, silently sliding in, to stand right beside her.

“Finally!” she exclaims, a look of annoyance plain on her usually happy face. She turned to face the man beside her. “I thought you were never going to show-”

She stopped mid sentence as she realized that it was Sherlock. Her annoyance seemed to melt away, and it was soon replaced with a smile.

“Sherlock!” she says, happily. “I thought you were someone else. Anyways, what are you doing here?”

“Well, I was just taking a stroll when I saw you.” she nodded, and Sherlock tried his best to sound as natural as possible. She shivered, her breath visible in the frosty air and Sherlock’s eyes widened with worry,

“Here, take my coat.” Sherlock murmurs, taking off his dark coat and putting it swiftly over her shoulders.

“No, I couldn’t.” she protested. “What about you?”

“I’m quite alright.”

She looked at him, a bit curious. It wasn’t every day you saw Sherlock going out of his way to do something caring for anyone. It felt odd and definitely suspicious. Not that she minded, she loved the feeling of the warm coat wrapped around her. It smelled distinctly of Sherlock. She discreetly inhaled his scent when he wasn’t looking. The girl smiled into the fabric, it felt comforting and right.

“I don’t want you to contaminate the flat next time you come over, it’s really quite terrible for my health and the severed body parts in the fridge when there are unwanted bacteria floating in the air.” Sherlock quickly added, trying to sound more like his bitter self. He couldn’t let his guard down, not yet.

She frowned, slightly disappointed that his bitterness had returned, but shrugged it off. It was normal for Sherlock to behave like that. Though she did love it when his occasional more caring character came to visit.

They stood in silence, side by side. Sherlock couldn’t take the ignorance of silence much longer, he had to tell her.

“Look, (Y/N). I need to tell you something-” he starts, his words rolling very quickly off his tongue as if he was going to start explaining an ‘obvious’ deduction. However, it was too late. Sherlock heard rather obnoxious footsteps and turned to face (Y/N)’s boyfriend, who didn’t look like he was hurrying at all.

“You’re late.” Sherlock hissed, wanting nothing more than to wipe the idiotic look off of the other man’s face. He smelled faintly of alcohol, his feet unsteady underneath him.

“Big deal. At least I’m here now.” the man says without a care, reaching down to grab (Y/N)’s hand. She looks at it for a millisecond before taking it hesitantly. Something that any other ordinary person wouldn’t have caught, however, Sherlock was no ordinary person.

“Why are you still here? You can leave now.” (Y/N)’s boyfriend snaps, practically dragging her inside. She gave Sherlock a helpless shrug and allowed herself to be towed inside.

Sherlock stares after them, wondering how such an amazing person like (Y/N) could be stuck with a person like him. Sherlock decided that he’d be staying for a while, despite her boyfriend’s wishes.


Sherlock peered over his menu, watching the couple at the next table. (Y/N) tapped her fingers against the table repeatedly, Sherlock knew this as a sign as to when she was annoyed or exasperated. Possibly both at that moment.

“Excuse me, sir?” a waiter comes up to Sherlock’s lonely table for the fifth time that night. “You’ve been here for an hour now and you still haven’t ordered anything. Is there anything on the menu that looks appetizing to you? May I suggest the-”

“A cup of tea please.” Sherlock cuts him off, eyes still glued to (Y/N)’s table.

“But sir, you’ve already had three-”

Tea, please.” Sherlock repeats, turning his head to face him, his eyes piercing into the ones of the slightly terrified looking waiter.
He nods, sighs and rushes off.

“You don’t deserve me!” Sherlock’s head snaps back to the other table when he heard someone shout. It was the wretched boyfriend. “I deserve much better than you!”

Her boyfriend had stood up, hands on the white-clothed table, looking beyond annoyed. (Y/N)’s head was in her hands, her figure shaking.

“Wrong.” Sherlock says abruptly, startling the two. The other man growled, throwing his hands up in the air.

“And you bring psychopaths with you! What’s wrong with you?”

“Wrong. Again!” Sherlock exclaims, jumping from his seat. “I’m a high-functioning sociopath, and she deserves better than you.”

“Why you-”

“Ah, ah.” Sherlock tuts, shutting the guy up with a single glare. “Tell me; did you notice? Do you notice anything different, anything at all?”

The man she deserved better than opened his mouth to say something (Sherlock presumed he would say something stupid) and stood dumbfounded, glaring at the consulting detective.

“Notice what?” he asked quietly, ashamed of not knowing and feeling stupid under the detective’s cold stare.

“Hmm, I don’t know maybe the fact that she bought a new outfit for tonight or the fact that she let her hair out of the ponytail and ditched the jeans and sneakers. Or maybe you could’ve noticed the new fragrance she decided to test out when she realized that you preferred the smell of fruit opposed to flowers. You could have complimented her and made her day, women like that don’t you know? Shows you’re considerate. Oh, but let’s not talk about only the changes in her appearance, no!” Sherlock rants, his words quick, tumbling over each other. “Let’s talk about everything she does for you, you idiot.”

“I really don’t think-” her boyfriend starts but Sherlock cuts him off, he was on a roll.

“Let’s see, first off, she reserved this table for you because you were too careless to even remember your anniversary. Oh, and might I mention she specifically booked a table far from the open windows because she was considering your allergies.”

“How did you-”

“You carry around eye drops and allergy pills around in your pockets, it’s really quite obvious. Now stop interrupting me! Now, where was I? Ah, yes. You might not realize it but she keeps you out of trouble all the time. Does your taxes, pays the rent and does everything to make you as happy as possible! She sacrifices her time and energy for you. But what do you do in return? A simple ‘thank you’ or an act that showed you cared would be nice but no! You stay out late, not even bothering to give her a heads up and thus making her sit awake until you get back home so she can sleep knowing that you got home safely. Should I go on?” he pauses to take a breath, not even waiting for an answer before continuing. “You flirt with other women but then you get angry at her for simply hugging an old friend. You ignore relationship problems and never initiate conversations. You arrive late to your anniversary and leave this incredible woman to wait by herself in the cold while you mingle with strangers at a bar!”

(Y/N) gasps and Sherlock flinches at the sound. For a second, he forgot that she was there.

You simply don’t care.” Sherlock says, coming to a conclusion.

“You don’t know this! You don’t know anything about our life, about my life!” the other man yells, shaking with rage while pointing a finger menacingly at Sherlock. He simply raises and eyebrow in answer. “You don’t know her like I do! I know her best!”

“Oh, but darling,” Sherlock whispers, coming so close to the other man’s face that their noses almost touched. “If you really did know her, you would have noticed. You would’ve noticed that she has stopped falling for you.”

The man opens his mouth to spat something in Sherlock’s smart face before thinking against it. He turned to face (Y/N) instead.

“Us? Yeah, it’s not a thing anymore. It’s-”

“No,” she says, standing up and interrupting him mid-sentence. “You always get the last word. It’s finally my turn. It’s over.”

Her faint, but powerful voice rings in their ears as her final words escape her mouth. Whether she regretted her decision or not, it was too late now.

“I suggest you leave before your ignorance starts to get contagious.” Sherlock mumbles to the enraged man. He doesn’t move.

Leave.” Sherlock repeats more aggressively. “You are no longer welcome in (Y/N)’s life.”

The man leaves without saying another word, stopping only for a second to glare at (Y/N), before leaving her life forever. She sinks back down into her seat as he exits the restaurant, resting her head on the table. Sherlock begins to walk out as well, knowing that he was probably unwelcome to comfort her.

“Sherlock, please don’t go.” she murmurs, just quietly enough that only he could hear what she had said. He nods, assuming the chair across from her, patiently waiting. What for, he wasn’t quite sure.

“Do you really pay that much attention to me? Did you really notice all those things?” she finally asks, bringing her head up from the table just enough to look him shyly in the eyes. “Or did John give you subtle hints before you left the flat?”

She laughs gently, and he smiles.

“Oh darling, I notice everything about you - and so much more.”


Thank you so much for reading! Feel free to leave a request, my ask box is always open!

Bit o’ Fun

Harry X Reader X Zayn: Smut

In which Harry adds a surprise guest into the equation (Zayn).

Request? Yes:

Well,,,,,,,,, the Harry imagine just about killed me, so truly from the bottom of my heart thanks for that. Hahah, can you do one with Harry AND Zayn? A threesome where the reader has a daddy kink?

Author’s note: I actually hate this. Be gentle!

“Hey, babe,” you greet as you stumble through the doorway. Your feet have been aching in a new pair of heels. Undoing the buckles quickly and whipping the shoes into a corner, you glance up into the depths of a dark hotel room, eyes straining to adjust.


The curtains are drawn over the window, only a crack of L.A. streetlight seeping into the center of the room. You can faintly make out Harry’s silhouette on the edge of the mattress.

“Hey, love.”

You take a firm step forward before another two wobbly ones back. There’s a second form on the bed, seated right beside Harry. Your fingers fumble along the wall for the light switch.

“Zayn?” You’re surprised as dim light filters through the space from a far lamp. Both of the boys squint, eyebrows drawn low on their foreheads.

“’S right.” Zayn smiles, flashing his teeth for a brief moment. “Hi, Y/N.”

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Cute Ask Game!!

based on cute anons ive been getting lately!! i actually received all of these, theyre really cute. 

  1. Do you plan on getting any tattoos when you get older? 
  2. If you are what do you plan on getting? 
  3. If you were a fish in a fishtank what kind of fish would you be and what tank decorations would make you happiest? 
  4. What’s your favorite dishware?
  5. What’s your favorite flower and why?
  6. Do you like waffles or pancakes better and why?
  7. Do you cosplay? 
  8. Who’s your favorite artist?
  9. If you had a Disney animal sidekick who would be by your side? 
  10. If you had the opportunity to create a new candy bar what would be in it and what would it be called?
  11. Say that you had a dream catcher that actually caught dreams. What are some of the things we would see caught in it? 
  12. If you were a tree what kind of tree would you be?
  13. What’s your favorite ice cream flavor?
  14. If you happened to meet an alien from outer space who wanted to know what earth was like from your perspective what would you tell them?
  15. What’s your favorite movie?
  16. What’s your favorite kind of jam, jelly, or marmalade?
  17. f you had a magical pair of shoes that when you clicked your heels you would transport to a different place where would you go first?
  18. If you had to replace one of your body parts (external or internal) with a really cool sci-fi robot arm that you could program to do anything you want what body part would you replace?
  19. What’s something that you haven’t eaten yet but you really really wanna try it someday? 
  20. Would you rather be a mermaid or a fairy and why?
  21. Would you rather become a stormchaser, monsterhunter (looking for bigfoot, mothman, etc) or a paranormal investigator and why?
  22. What is your favorite topping to put on ice cream or frozen yogurt or do you just like it the way it is?
  23. Would you rather master the art of kung fu or master the art of feng shui?
  24. Opinion on dogs? Favorite dog breed? Favorite animal if you’re not a dog person? Any pets?
  25. What’s your favorite genre for books?
  26. If you were a cat what is the one place you will sleep that seems uncomfortable and confuses owners?
  27. What’s your favorite snack food?

asugarplumfairy  asked:

RFA +V/Saeran with smol MC? :)

Okay for all of these MC is like 5´3¨


-Makes him feel like a manly man that he´s taller than you

-Even though he´s 5´6¨ lolol

-When you can´t reach something he swoops in because he´s the tall one and feels all cool

-But then he can´t reach it either whoops

-Ur house has a lot of stools

-I feel like you guys are like those vines where the short people like team up to fight whenever someone insults you


Yoosung: Kick his ass baby I got ur flower


-She´s like two inches taller than you

-She doesn´t really comment on your height, it doesn´t matter to her

-She does find it kind of cute to see you stretch up to try and reach the coffee beans on the top shelf

-But honestly she´s just like ¨Okay MC is shorter than me. What am I gonna make for dinner¨


-Loves that you´re so tiny

-He feels very protective over you

-At first he´s very delicate with you, like he thinks you´re so small that you´ll fall apart

-Until you´re like ¨Zen wtf I am a full blown adult¨

-He annoys you sometimes because he can´t take you seriously when you´re mad at him, you´re just too cute!

-Doesn´t get stools, he just swoops in whenever you can´t reach something to reach it for you

-He´s the best big spoon tbh

-You feel so warm and cozy in his arms

-Always makes sure you get a seat to his shows where you´re not blocked by tall people


-He´s a tree honestly he´s so tall

-Imagine all those cute height difference otp prompts and that´s you guys

-Like you´ll try to kiss him but you still can´t reach him on your tiptoes, and he notices and leans down to kiss you

-Completely remodels the penthouse to be more accommodating to your height, cause it was catered towards him and you could barely reach the sink

-There are some tabloid rumors about your age which Jumin quickly works to dispel. He hates that people are trying to make drama in your relationship.

-Also your height would make it easier to do bondage



-The short puns

-Oh my god the short puns

-He´d tease you all the time like ¨Hey MC hows the weather down there?¨

-Hold things out of your reach sometimes to annoy you

-But if you’re self conscious about it he’ll stop teasing you cause he doesn´t want to actually hurt your feelings

-You both have a giant collection of heels and you fight about who has more pairs

-One day you decide to just count up all your heels to see once and for all who has more

-Saeran walks out of his room to find both of you surrounded by shoes while you´re yelling at him that ¨WEDGES ARE FUCKIN HEELS YOU DONGLE¨


-When he lured you into the apartment he thought that it was perfect because you´re so small and defenseless (lolol)

-But once he gets to know you after the after ending he realizes you can THROW DOWN

-Like I´m imagining some guy hits on you and he´s about ready to murder him until you just fucking deck him in the face and knock him out.

-Saeran *softly*: holy shit

-You are super adorable when you´re not punching someone in the face and he doesn´t know why or how the fuck he´s supposed to express this feeling

-¨You look like a bunny¨ ¨Thanks?

-He´s trying okay?

The emergency room is warm, the heat spitting out through the vents on the ceiling, but Harry can’t stop shaking no matter how tightly he wraps his winter jacket around him, his fingertips cold and his breathing uneven. The fluorescent lights above him cast a yellow shadow across the room, the one to the far left flickering every so often. It’s distracting, but not in the way he’d like it to be, and every time it blinks off, he flinches, wishing it would stay on, or off, one way or the other.

It’s all one, big cinematic cliche. Harry can’t fathom that this is actually happening, that he isn’t on the other side of the screen at the theater, trying to imagine what it would be like.

He doesn’t have to imagine.

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[NCT127] Reaction to having a short s/o

A/N: This was a request by @markleetrashh   @cherrymargarie, my dear first friend here heh THANK YOU FOR THE REQUEST and good luck for your oral tomorrow love ❣️

Style/ Genre: Reaction– headcannon
Date posted: 12/07/17


Originally posted by taesyong

  • probably the kind that would like a smaller s/o
  • our oldest isn’t v tall anyway
  • would enjoy ruffling your hair
  • would feel even more protective of you
  • would think you’re a vulnerable bean before realising you’re a mini warrior
  • probably think you’re x1000 cuter
  • would actually like being the bigger one
  • technically drowning in taeil’s love because of him feeling the need to protect and caring for you 24/7
  • okay idrk about taeil i’m so sorry 😂 


Originally posted by nakamotens

  • enjoys teasing you for your height
  • but the height difference would be absolutely adorable
  • “oh my little smol lovely beannnnn”
  • would enjoy hugging you and see you being engulfed in his chest
  • and chuckles whenever he does it till you can hardly breathe and have to resort to hitting his arm before he lets you go
  • him voluntarily helping you take stuff from higher shelves even before you asking him
  • enjoys picking you up and swinging you around off the ground
  • looking around and pretending he lost you
  • okay but they would be times when he actually wasn’t pretending

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goahead-getyourjollies  asked:

Hc about the gang preparing you for your first date? (It's silly but whatever lol)

Before I even start, I love your profile picture, I am twenty one pilots trash, extra points for you. 👏

- Sodapop’s doing your nails and giving you tips like, “Don’t be shy, it’ll be fun. First dates aren’t as bad as they seem,” he’s literally giving you Girl Talk 101™

- Darry’s focused af on brushing & curling your hair and he’s honestly good at it??

- Ponyboy is digging through your closet to figure out what you would wear and arguing with Steve like, “This dress is better on her, this color suits her more,” and Steve’s all like, “How blind can you get, this one would compliment her shape,” and the bickering is endless.

- Dallas and Two-bit are trying to figure out what shoes you’re gonna wear like, Two-bit whips out a pair of stilettos and looks towards Dallas, “You think these’ll work?” and Dallas puts a hand on his shoulder like, “Keith, my man, they’ve gotta be higher than that,” then he pulls out the 8-inch heels like, “These are the ones.”

- Johnny’s doing your makeup and giving you a gentle little pep talk as he applies your foundation and stuff, It’s his first time doing it, but he’s actually pretty good?? Johnny’s always been a quick learner and he observes a lot, so. That winged eyeliner is lookin’ bomb. 👌

Super Star (Part 2)

Originally posted by iwriteaboutdean

Summary: Jensen brings the reader over for dinner at his place…

Part 1

Pairing: Jensen x reader

Word Count: 3,200ish

Warnings: language

A/N: A wee bit of angst but only a teensy bit…

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How to Get Rich Quick as a Sugar Baby

1. Learn now that there is NO get rich quick formula. 

This process takes times, and for many of us money…it takes money to make money honey! That said; some girls are lucky, some are in better areas(around men with fatter wallets), some are in a better position(i.e. have their own car/apt to travel and host) Everybody’s situation is different. Sugar babies are like snowflakes, no two are the same. The sooner you learn that and CAPITALIZE ON IT, the happier you will be. While you can’t get rich immediately there are ways of jumping into the bowl and starting on your best foot forward. It’s always better to start ahead than behind. That said brings me to #2 


Research your area, what’s normal for the girls around your area, How they look, How they dress what’s normal etc. Look up sample sugar accounts and see how they look. As for the men? Stalk the shit out of them make sure you reverse image search, if they give you a card search their name and company. Pretend he’s your man and he’s cheating on you with a woman at his job FIND EVERYTHING YOU CAN ON HIM. Yes sometimes they are apprehensive about giving too many personal details…rightfully so a sugar baby scorned can be a very dangerous thing. Girls out men to family members, jobs etc. But your safety comes first which leads me into the next point


Please don’t be out here doing dumb shit, if it doesn’t occur to you that you should be meeting a strange new man in a public place BEFORE ever going to his hotel room, apt, etc…you’re too naive to be doing this in the first place. Being naive in the sugar game is enough to get you killed. I mean that literally. Tell someone, anyone where you will be meeting POTs, time, place, how long it should last. They don’t have to know, just tell them you have a date and just wanted someone to know your whereabouts whatever you have to say to keep them from asking too many questions. I have someone call me about 15 minutes into the date so if it’s going bad I can pretend it’s a family emergency and leave and if it’s going great I let them know I’ll call them when it’s over. This is important. Calling when it’s over keeps yo ass from getting kidnapped. Take heed to my warning dear women of the bowl. Say what you must to insure your saftey…bringing me to my next point 

4. LIE, LIE, LIE..Fake it until you make it. 

Fake name, fake adress, fake school, fake ID, fake everything. Keep yours lies IN ORDER! Men are oblivious…not stupid, they will notice if you say you go to NYU then say you go to Standford later on. Keep it simple. Keep it believable. Keep it together. Use the same lie for every POT /or/ use the same ~method~ of lying for each…make their alma mttern your school, their job your aspiration etc. Do not ever get so comfortable with an SD/SM/POT that you start giving out personal details. This is how you get caught, outed, or stalked. And those are not the worst of what can happen when an SD has your information. We know the world we live in, and while I may not care about family knowing I’m an SB I don’t need the implications of that ever getting back to the professional world. 

5. Make business cards. 

Have your sugar identity well put together. Be ready to deflect questions don’t ever give more than what he asked. If you have cards it makes you look more professional that’s bonus let’s a POT know you don’t play. It makes your sugar identity more realistic. And hell, it helps you to remember your own sugar name, I forgot mine a few times when I first started lol  

6. Cultivate your online identity. Make sure you use pictures that you don’t have on ANY other site other than sugar sites. 

You don’t want him reverse image searching your most popular facbook/instagram/Twitter picture because we all know that’s a slippery slope to seeing a wholeeeeee Lotta people you know. THIS IS IMPORTANT: Facebook sometimes uses your location to show people if they should friend you, so please don’t be logged in when you meet with a client or POT…this goes for everybody escorts, full service sex workers, strippers etc. You do not want your personal Facebook page getting into the wrong hands. Make a fake Facebook and have that logged in…even if you don’t have the app open, or on if it’s used through other apps (like candy crush) you will come up in the suggested area. That is not something you want…there are posts about how to dismantle that. Find them.

7. Keep your vanilla life out of your sugar life. 

I’m not saying your BF/GF has to go, but they have no place in conversations with your POT. Just because they may know about your sugar life doesn’t mean your sugar life has to know about them. And be careful who you tell, friends get jeaous. Significant others get jealous. Parents get defesive (at the fact that they cant provide for you and they dont agree with the way youve decided to provide for yourself). Be very careful about telling other hoes too, everybody’s your friend until you’re making more than them.

8. Tell a friend. 

Seriously. It helps. Find a person you know won’t judge you, even if it’s just online and make them your confidante…it helps this life can be stressful. ONE PERSON 

9. Back to fake it til you make it. Just cuz you don’t HAVE money, doesn’t mean you can’t LOOK like money.

 Staple pieces are important in any collection. In the words of my savior Cardi B. LEARN TO BUDGET HOE. You can make a $20 outfit look like a $200 outfit depending on the shoes and jewelry you wear. Make sure your outfits don’t say too much. And make sure you’re dressed for the occassion. If you’re going to a dinner dress and heels should suffice play it up with your bag.. movies? Dress down a little bit, play it up on the jewelry. Shopping? Wear something comfortable to walk around in, but easy to change in and out of, men love seeing you try shit on! So flats, a sundress and a clutch; you’ll already have bags to take home don’t add another. You’re outfit doesn’t have to COST money to LOOK like money. Remember that. Especially since men have no taste and know shit about what’s name brand and what isn’t. Real name brand is on the tags not the item. 

Staple pieces include(theres 100 of these so I’m not adding pictures): 
•nice pair of blue jeans 
•plain sundress
•nice bikini & one piece
•cute but classy pair of shorts
•simple lightweight blazer
•plain neutral heels
• open toe shoes
•strappy sandles(trust me these are a must have they dress up ANY outfit)
• nice silky ~looking blouse..doesn’t actually have to be silk (forever 21)
• fitted nuetral button up shirt(s) that play up your boobs
•a good strapless bra
•a good pushup bra
•a good nude bra Black & Brown sugar babies nude is not one color, please get something that suits YOUR skin tone. 

10. Trust your gut, and use common sense. If something doesn’t feel right, it probably isn’t! 

If a POT scares you, leave! You owe no explanation. Excuse yourself and LEAVE. Your instincts are real do not ignore them, you can’t spend money if you’re dead. Play it smart ladies and stay safe. Staple saftey items you can find on Groupon, Amazon, Ebay or a local store near you:
•Portable flats aka roll up flats (can’t run in stilettos)
•Portable phone charger (life saver)
•Tazer(stun gun) check the laws of your state though
•Mase (legal everywhere)
•Incognito Knife (they come in cute designs such as pen, lipstick, key etc)
•Your common sense, no amount of money is worth your life Sugar!

Originally posted by gorunwithsissors


Five times Tom’s smile saved you

Summary: The five times Tom saved you with a smile

A/N: My last imagine didn’t get a lot of love, so I’d appreciate it if you’d go and love if, much love also this one is still not edited

The first time:

The first time was when you first met, you were standing in line to get your picture taken with Sebastian Stan at comic con. You’re heart was racing out your chest but you fingers fumbled over your polaroid camera with nerves. Tom was at his first ever comic con as Spider-Man, fans were taking photo after photo, he had gotten kiss after kiss but something about you seemed to haul him in. Maybe it was how you stood dead still but he could see your hands change from fumbling with your camera to fondling with the VIP badge that had the roped neck frayed to finally brushing down you legs hoping that you all but looked presentable. You had caught his eye a few times and he gave a small smile each time but you looked away, standing in the exit of Sebastian’s photo booth to say hello to fans he could see you enter into the booth.

You gave a dazzling smile that he was sure you couldn’t tell was breath taking, linking arms with Sebastian you look to the camera and smile but he can hear a soft hum that he can connect to be your voice. “I’m a photographer and I specialize in polaroid’s, do you mind if I take one of you?” He looks thrilled and she crouches down and gets a photo before moving on. “A photographer huh?” he questions making her jump out of her skin. Walking towards the exit she nods, not realizing who he is, “you can take one of me if you’d like?” She spins and eyes expand to the size of saucers, as her fingers skim over the camera with delicacy she nearly drops it. 

He had offered a simple smile and suddenly she seems to function better, fingers clasping it strongly. A photo is taken and he ask if he could have her number to which she agreed.

Keep reading

what your favorite grunge musician says about you
  • kurt cobain: the world just doesn't understand you. also your favorite book is the catcher in the rye.
  • eddie vedder: you spend a lot of time alone in your room crying over sappy movies, but you'd never admit this.
  • chris cornell: your hobbies include not wearing a shirt and screaming.
  • layne staley: people fear you but actually you give the best hugs.
  • courtney love: you're constantly prepared to beat a man up with a pair of high heels.
  • dave grohl: you're a Cool Dad.
  • andy wood: you tell everyone you're a slut when really you've kissed like 3 people.
  • stone gossard: you ding dong ditched people a lot in elementary school.
  • matt cameron: someday you'll be a hot suburban mom who frequently cheats on her rich husband with her 20-something fitness instructor.
  • jerry cantrell: no one appreciates you but it's ok, you're just here for the beer.
  • ben shepherd: you enjoy setting things on fire.
Can't Help Falling In Love | Peter Parker

requested: yes, but i kinda failed it i am so sorry i will do another one thats actually true to the song!

pairing: peter parker x reader

summary: supposed to be off the song can’t help falling in love with you but i kinda got side tracked I deeply apologize.

warnings: one swear word?

Peters heart dropped.
You stepped off the stairs. You were wearing a long black satin dress with a slit up the side and strappy black heels. Your hair was curled meticulously and your lips were ruby red.
Peter could hear his heart pounding, and had no clue what to do. You looked beyond breathtaking. He wore a black tie suit. You were both going to your friends birthday dinner. The friend had insisted on going somewhere fantastically fabulous, naturally. Peter offered to drop you there and back and being best friends you obviously said yes.
Peter stood there gobsmacked staring at you.
“ready” you asked as you gave him a weird look. God, Peter looked so handsome in his tux.
He smiled weakly and took your hand and walked you out of the lobby and to his car.
Soon you were speeding through the streets. Just you and Peter. The way its always been. Peter was hopelessly falling in love with you, and you were hopelessly falling in love with Peter. The two of you however were so defiant in admitting your feelings for one another. So you sat in comfortable silence while the music played, staring at each other when the other would look away. The very definition of longing.
Soon you were at the restaurant and were separated.


You got back into the car and Peter pulled away from the restaurant.
“so everyone seemed to be have enjoyed themselves” you said, drumming your fingers on the side of the window.
“yeah I guess” he sighed, the entire night he hadn’t been able to talk to you, constantly pulled off to talk to other people. And seeing you look like that, and being unable to touch or even talk to you had killed him.
“you seemed to be having a lot of fun with Lauren” you shrugged. Peter looked at you, confused. “I just mean you guys seemed to be hitting it off”you tried to casually joke, even though it hurt you. Peter heard the strained joke and couldn’t shake it off.
As soon as you pulled up to your apartment building you got out and started walking into the building. To your surprise Peter came after you. He called out your name. You slowly turned around and stopped.
“What?” you frowned, had you left something in the car?
“I- I have no interest in Lauren” he stuttered. Your heart soared. however, you obviously couldn’t let Peter in on your emotions.
“ok?” you asked, feeling panic rises in your throat. Had he figured out what he meant to you? even though you had tried your hardest to ignore it? to stop it? to end it?
“well, i just, it seemed like you cared” he shrugged stepping closer to you.
“well, i don’t” you stepped away “it seems like you do” he stepped closer
“well I don’t” you argued pulling farther away from him. “hey, hey calm down” he said, reaching out for your arms. You let him take your hands and pulled you into a deep hug. You slowly relaxed into him and felt a weight lift.
Suddenly Peter pulled away.he stared at you intently with a harsh intensity. He looked at you and raised a hand to his mouth and then ran it anxiously through his hair.
“I can’t do this anymore” he whispered, still staring at you. “can’t do what Peter” you asked, completely stunned.
“this” he hissed, gesturing between the two of you and throwing his hands up in the air,, walking in circles. You could see his eyes starting to fill up
THIS” he yelled. “i can’t look at you and hug you and pretend i don’t feel something, pretend I’m not falling in love with you. Because I am. I have been for so long. and it kills me that I can’t say anything because it may risk our friendship. Fuck I can’t do it anymore. it’s killing me. And its not like i haven’t tried to stop it. Ive tried to pick apart your every flaw but it just doesn’t work. I just can’t help it. I- I just can’t help falling in love with you.” he trailed off at the end. you didn’t think, didn’t say anything. You just ran right into him and kissed him, kissed him with everything you had, to make up for all that time you had spent hiding your feelings. you felt Peter kiss you back with the same fierceness. Peter pulled away slowly, your noses still just touching and foreheads resting against each other, with his arms now wrapped around your waist.
“Peter Parker, for some reason, I can’t seem to stop falling in love with you either.”

Kinky Night (Jaehyun)

anon said: Smut with Jaehyun please. Jaehyun’s back from performing abroad and he’s brought you a little present, lingerie. you’re more than happy to oblige and give him what he wants but you’ve also bought a few surprises, a pair of handcuffs and blindfolds. your both eager to get it on in an ‘extra special’ way tonight. Feel free to play with any other fetish or kink. maybe ice play, breath control and overstimulation. what can I say I have a wild imagination lol. Peace!~~ 

author: admin ni ayeee

word count: 2,834 (i got a little carried away, so not sorry :) )

genre: kink smut for ya nasties

a/n: luv ur request marry me (again the “sex” is referring to ya naughty parts lmaooooo)

Keep reading

Fresh Eyes // 2:04 PM

Pairing: Reader x Tom

Featuring: Tom Holland

Warning: fluff

Request - could you do a tom imagine based on the song fresh eyes? Like tom invites her to a premiere or something and she gets dressed up really fancy and that’s the first time he sees her like that?


The premiere that your boyfriend had invited you to started in less than thirty minutes, and you were desperately trying to find your shoes. The ones you had decided to wear were tall heels, since you were a foot or two shorter than your boyfriend, you could actually get away with wearing heels without looking like a daddy-long-leg.

Your phone buzzed from inside your clutch. Opening it up to see that it was a message from your boyfriend. You both had agreed to meet each other there. Since he had to be there almost two hours sooner than you could get there. Your work had made you stay overtime, which was something you specifically asked to not have happen. But the odds were never in your favour.

‘T-minus fifteen minutes love’

Your eyes scanned the text over and over again. Only fifteen minutes? You thought your had thirty. Rushing around the vast condo, you quickly found the heels that were hidden under a pile of coats that were thrown on the floor. You got messy when you were rushing.

You slipped on your soft overcoat and put on the heels, reveling in the new height. The car was parked out front, waiting for you. You got down to the lobby in two minutes, the elevator didn’t need to stop.

“Miss (L/N).” Gregory, your chauffer greeted you with a smile as he held open the car door.

“Thank you,” you said as you slipped into the leather seat. Your dress flowing in after you.

You had chosen something elegant, but not to overbearing. It was a dress you had picked out over a year ago, but it sat lonely in your closet since you had no big events to ever wear it to. Though, your boyfriend had never seen the dress, you chose tonight to surprise him. It was spaghetti strap, sparkling, and long. There was an open back, and a slit that ran up the side of your leg, to mid-thigh. It was elegant, really. And it was perfect.

The car came to a stop just outside the theatre. Cars were parked all alongside the walkway and paparazzi surrounded everyone. People were everywhere, except along the clean, red carpet that identified where all the celebrities were meant to stand.

Your eyes scanned the sea of people, searching for your tall, handsome boyfriend. Catching his ruffle of smooth, caramel brown hair made your heart swell. He was dressed fittingly in a blue suit, his smile radiant as he greeted different people. Gregory opened the car door for you as you stepped out, your long dress following swiftly behind. Eyes turned to you, cameras started to flash.

People knew who you were. You were Tom Holland’s extravagantly beautiful girlfriend. Not to sound self-righteous. You had read that line in a magazine once. It made you feel weird, knowing that everyone knew your face. They knew your name, your last name, where you came from, and so on. But you didn’t mind that fact, because you got to go home to an incredible boyfriend.

Tom noticed you almost instantly, his eyes following the swarm of paparazzi as your appearance was welcomed. His features lit up in glee as he pushed his way over to you, leading you gently by the hand to the clear red carpet. Once you made it out of the swarm, Tom rested his hands lightly on your hips, his eyes scanning you up and down in a devouring way.

“You look absolutely ravishing.” Tom said, his eyes finally reaching your face after he took in the dress. Heat rose to your cheeks, knowing only he could make you feel so hot and bothered with only a few simple words.

“Thank you,” you breathed, trying to get accustomed to the mass of people around you. “You look rather dashing, yourself.” You added, bringing your hand up to move aside a stray hair that protruded from the rest.

“We’re the best looking out here tonight.” Tom smiled warmly at you, him still slightly taller than you even in your heels. He then led you further along the carpet. His hand stayed on the small of your back as the night progressed onward.

The night had continued on with cameras and people, you met multiple new actors and actresses that had come to the premiere, each one commenting on ‘Tom’s stunning girlfriend’.

Standing now, almost to the end of the evening, the premiere was just coming to an end, as you and Tom stood outside the theatre, his arm laced around your torso. Gregory was pulling the car around for your ride home. Tom leaned close to you, his lips just brushing your ear.

“You looked so incredible tonight, love. Your hair, your dress. You were completely jaw-dropping.” Tom whispered, sending shivers down your spine as his hot breath touched your skin.

“Thank you, Tom.” You said to him, turning just slightly to place a meaningful kiss on his soft lips. He kissed you back, pulling you tighter into him, your body feeling the fabric of his suit on the bare skin that your dress exposed.

“Now, I can’t wait to get home and take it off.” Tom then said after leaving your lips, whispering roughly in your ear, his accent becoming somewhat demanding, desperate. Your heart began to accelerate at his words, his hand playing idly with the fabric of your dress.

No words could be said, as he knew you were thinking the same thing. The both of you raced into the car as Gregory pulled up along side the walkway.

“Home! Gregory, home!” Tom nearly shouted, his bubbling laughter following the chime. You couldn’t contain your own laugher as Gregory easily pulled back onto the road, the both of you forgetful to put on your seat belts.

You fell clumsily into Tom’s lap, where he swiftly grabbed hold of you by the waist, not letting you get up, your eyes became level with his as you hovered above him.

“I love you, (F/N).” Tom hummed, he was breathless. His eyes searched your face, he took in every detail and every feature.

“I love you more, Holland.” Your own voice had escaped you as your hands found his jaw, pulling his face up to connect to your lips.

hope you like it beb - Xx

Prompt List: (x)

Tag List:

@calilycal @tomsleftbrow

anonymous asked:

Do you have masterlists or mini master lists with High School! Aus where Dan and Phil are really good friends but then they kiss/fall in love? So basically high school friends to lovers

All My Days I’ll Know Your Face - When a new kid starts at Phil’s school, Phil certainly doesn’t expect him to be everything he ever could have hoped for in a friend and more. Can he convince him to let go of the past and audition for the school musical? And what about those feelings that somehow seem to pop up when he least expects them?

can’t help the itch to touch- to kiss. (ao3) - deaf!phil and playboy!dan are best friends and people think they’re dating

Kings - Dan and Phil jokingly nominate each other for homecoming king and the whole school ships it.

Phase Five (ao3) - Dan suddenly realizes he wouldn’t mind having a boyfriend. He and Phil decide to make a plan to find Dan a boyfriend, but life, as usual, doesn’t go as expected.

PromDan knows Phil Lester as the popular kid in his school who everybody loves and adores. They never really talk to each other. Dan is surprised when Phil wants to talk to him and actually ends up asking him to the prom, which Dan had no intention of going to… until now.

Right in front of your eyes -  Phil starts to receive cute little love notes in his locker each morning, but he had no idea that the person sending them is closer than he thinks.

Something To Be Proud Of - High School AU where Dan and Phil drifted apart over the years but then they get paired up for a project and they become friends again and later they get together.

The Boy With The Beautiful Blue Eyes (ao3) - in which Dan falls head over heels for an artist with amazing eyes

This Love is IrrelevantDan or Phil are in a biology test or something and they try to tell the other the answer which is something like elephant and they think they say ‘I love you’

you’re my favorite person (ao3) - Dan had always been one the dickheads at school who bullied other people but Dan always seemed to favor picking on Phil. It wasn’t anything Phil couldn’t handle after he had dealt with it long enough to learn how to ignore it. That is until Dan’s teasing turned almost flirtatious. That was something Phil was not prepared to deal with.

- Sam