and a lady i dont know

the kiplings finding out that dizzee is in a relationship and dizzee’s like fuck fuck they found out i need to tell them everything about- but winston just steps in like “so whos the lucky lady” and dizzee realises that his family thinks hes dating a girl so he just lets it slide and figures he’ll just tell them when he feels more ready. so it gets to a point where winston and adele are like “why dont you ever bring her over here?? you know what, this friday bring her here for dinner!” and dizzees like fuck, fuck now i really have to tell them. but he just keeps putting it off and off and off and he tells thor and thors like “dude, you gotta tell them” but dizzee just c a n t. so it gets to friday and dinners ready and the doorbell rings. dizzee fucking skids to the door in hyper speed so no one can open the door before him and then really quick before he opens the door, he turns around and just says like “by the way, you know my girlfriend? well shes-hes actually my boyfriend”, opens the door and dinner unfolds.

For Day 4 of @tazladyweek, Canon Divergence. Don’t get me wrong, I love NO3113 as a member of Team Sweet Flips, but I really want her to be able to go home and chill with her family as well, maybe have some fun being an auntie?

Jemma being cute and lovely ft. paint at the beach \0/

when there’s a girl who finally likes you and you think she’s going to confess to you but you like another girl so before she gets the chance to tell you she likes you, you start telling her how there’s another girl who you like but then an older city boy appears and you assume it’s her boyfriend and that you completely misunderstood the situation

2

post-reveal maybe, before Adrienne knows Marin’s feelings are mutual?? the interpretation is up to you. anyway, thank you everyone who watched me draw this during the stream. it was a lot of fun working on it while chatting with you guys!

anonymous asked:

bucky tell us a story about darcy

darcy lewis goes drinking with thor.

that alone should be enough to send your imaginations spinning off to wild places, but that, my friends, is only where our story begins.
it is also something you should know, just in general, in case you happen to encounter darcy lewis.
she’s tazed a god twice, and she goes drinking with thor. on a regular basis.
the first time thor wanted to go drinking after i showed up, lewis was there too. and naturally, if thor was going out so was she. neither of them knew us newbie avengers well yet, but being sociable sort of people, they invited us to tag along. scott immediately agreed, but sam was caught up doing some beta testing in the labs with tony, and said he would catch up when they were done.
so darcy, thor, scott and i went out drinking.
fun fact about thor: it takes him approximately one million alcohols to get drunk, but once he’s there, he likes to sing. preferably epic ballads of victory in battle, but he’s pretty much game for any catchy song that will get a bar excited. that being the case, lewis and thor’s go-to midgardian bar is a karaoke joint.
im sure you begin to see where things are going wrong.
fun fact about darcy lewis? she can also hold her alcohol, but cannot carry at tune. like. at all.
that doesnt stop her from singing, mind you. gotta respect a lady who knows shes terrible but enjoys herself anyway.
scott apparently loves karaoke. i dont know why that surprised me, but it did. even more surprising? hes not actually that bad, although like 90% of his song choices were bruce springsteen. no clue why. anyway, thor was delighted by having a buddy who was not only willing but able to sing with him, and after scott got over his star-struck-ness they had a pretty great time.
it was a good thing that thor and lewis went to that bar on the regular, because im sure any place that hadnt been prepared for them would have kicked all of us out. as it was, they finally booted us out the door after a rousing rendition of ‘wrecking ball’ had most of the bar on their feet. and broke two tables.
(thor apparently settles his tab there in asgardian gold, so no hard feelings from the bartenders.)
the night was young and all of us had enough booze in our systems that we decided to catch a cab back to the tower and see if we could rope anyone else into some shennanigans. thor was buzzed at least, which for thor means his voice is even boomier and his gestures are more expansive–you gotta be ready to duck. scott was drunk, no question about it, and that was probably why theyd wound up singing wrecking ball in the first place. scott’s a cheerful if floppy, “ i love you, i love all of you guys, i love everyone in this bar ” kind of drunk, and was mostly travelling by merit of being wrapped around thors bicep. i was a little buzzed myself, and lewis had had nearly as much as i did. remarkably, she seemed to be chugging along pretty well, some weaving and slurring aside. the lady lives up to her god-tazing reputation.
anyway, we got out of the cab at the tower and started making our way to the doors. scott had partially detached from thors arm and needed extra support, so i was helping keep him from capsizing while lewis trailed a few steps behind the three of us, making color commentary of our three stooges act.
and then out of nowhere, she just…yelled.
all three of us whipped around as quickly as three drunk superpeople can, just in time to see darcy lewis dish out what looked to be a pretty dang textbook perfect roundhouse kick to the chest of some poor guy.
the guy went down. lewis went down too, because the kick had totally overbalanced her. thor and i dropped scott and ran over to help.
which was when sam sat up and said ‘that was a hell of a kick’
because apparently hed finished up his testing and gone out to catch up with us, made it partway down the block to call a cab, then saw us getting out of our taxi. he jogged back–not being particularly stealthy, but we were drunk–and put his hand on lewis’s shoulder to get her attention.
lewis, having pretty poor vision even sober, and worse vision when drunk and without her glasses, just saw some big male figure who’d popped up out of nowhere and grabbed her by the shoulder.
so naturally she kicked him in the chest.
she apologized profusely, but the rest of us thought it was pretty funny. and sam was impressed the next morning when he discovered that she’d left a visible footprint on his chest.
darcy insists she has no idea why she did it. or where she learned to kick like that.
the rest of us have just chalked it up to mysterious darcy lewis powers.

8

Let me tell you somethin’: it’s black people everywhere, you remember that, okay? Ain’t no place in the world ain’t what got no black people, we was the first ones on this planet. I’m from Cuba. Lotta black folks in Cuba but you wouldn’t know it from being here. Was a wild lil’ shorty just like you, used to run around with no shoes on when the moon was out. This one time… I ran by this old, old lady, was just a runnin’ and a hollerin’ and cuttin’ a fool, boy. And this old lady, she stop me and she say to me, ‘Look at you. I was a lil’ bad ass too, you know.’ She say, ‘Look at you’ and I say ‘Look at you!’ Then she smiled and she say, ‘running around catching up all this light. In moonlight’ she say, ‘black boys look blue. You blue,’ she say. ‘That’s what I’m gone call you: Blue.”

MOONLIGHT (2016) dir. Barry Jenkins

lovelyshyness  asked:

Hello! I adore your books, Clockwork Angel is what got me into reading, and it remains my favorite. I have a question about Lady Midnight, the scene with Magnus at Malcolm's house, and he is talking about another wedding, but Emma and Julian dont remember another. Is he referring to the one we know happened between Jem and Tessa? And Why don't they remember it? This has been nagging me for a while, will we learn why they don't remember? Thank you so much in advance!

Yes, he is referring to Jem and Tessa’s wedding, and we don’t yet know why no one remembers it happening. Except Magnus presumably (and Jem and Tessa!)

MC is going to go get her hair done
  • *she goes to walk in but sees two familiar faces*
  • MC: oh my god is that zen and jumin
  • MC: thEY'RE GETTING THEIR HAIR DONE TOGETHER?
  • Jumin: You know, I'm glad we made up.
  • Zen: Me too, you're not that bad trust fu-
  • MC: *runs in while taking pictures on her phone* ME THREE I AM ALSO GLAD
  • Zen: *falls out of seat* NO MC DONT SHOW ANYONE NBONONONONONONONONO
  • MC: I'M ALREADY SENDING THEM TO SEVEN
  • Zen: NOOO OO O O O O. O OO. O O O STOP
  • Jumin: You're ashamed to be seen with me, zen?
  • Zen: No it's - it's not that just you know you got that... gay rumor thing and I just don't want the ladies to be put off
  • Jumin: *stands up and puts his arm around zen* MC take a picture quick
  • Zen: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
  • MC: oh my god best day ever

lmao i often get old people from my hometown calling my number by accident and i just noticed i had a missed call + voicemail so i listened to it and i just hear an old lady say “……i dont know who dis is” and then press like 5 buttons trying to hang up

2

this is it lads. i can ascend to a new plane of existence now that i have met them.

highlights include:
• dan complimenting my fox shirt with “Phil would love that shirt”
• having to go back cause the first photo was blurry and them being super nice and apologetic about it
• dans dainty hugs and phils soft warm hugs
• the outfits? dan’s hobbit hair? praise jesus.
• me: the peace signs are good!!
dan: oh thank you!

im on mobile can someone pls add that one gif of the lady throwing herself dramatically at a car

6

okay y’all have seen me gripe about this a lot but i still just wanna bring this back up again bc this always bugged me.

i know i said earlier that i didnt mind the gems not having more alien-like features but…

seeing the scrapped designs make me wish we had something more interesting. like you know those character concepts for disney films where the character looks really dynamic and interesting but then its scrapped to make an incredibly boring and cookie-cutter design? thats how it feels for SU.

before y’all say anything, im not calling the finished designs bad. they’re perfectly passable (and i adore bismuth’s design). i do have some issues with lapis since she’s a terraformer but she’s small and skinny (i’ve already explained that in depth in an earlier post).

i wish su would push their designs further and made more risks bc im getting a little bored of only getting to see cool designs in fusions (which have become a rarity now). like the only non-fusion character with an unnatural attribute is sapphire with having only one eye. I know jasper’s old concept design looks a little silly but i love the odd geometric shapes to her. it has a bit of personality to it and pushes the “big strong brute” attribute harder than her design thats just a buff lady with orange skin. or bismuth’s odd robotic body like her wrists, eyes and waist. Or lapis where her features aren’t alien-like but she has crazier hair and a more interesting facial design with 0 eyebrows and groved in eyeballs (with these weird black lines surrounding it i love it).

i dont know why the character designers  don’t want to be more creative with their approaches. are they afraid they’re gonna get hate for it? i mean people weren’t crazy about YD’s design when she was introduced, but everyone got over it and the designers brushed it off.

 and before y’all say “oh but it’ll be harder on the animators because there’s more detail” i want to remind you they’ve been managing fine animating characters like sugilite who has a more cluttered design

and sardonyx who frequently uses hand gestures despite having 4 arms

random bios➳

Like the post and/or give credit to nddobrev on twitter.
De like no post e/ou de créditos para nddobrev no twitter. 

inglês/english 
  1. talents: sleeping 

  2. i didn’t choose the boob life, the boob life chose me.

  3. this semester isn’t done but i sure am 

  4. never tell a fangirl to calm down. it won’t work 

  5. i dont know whats emptier, my bank account or my love life 

  6. if you eat enough pizza it tastes like love 

  7. im 900% ready for summer vacation 

  8. please don’t waste good pizza on bad people 

  9. i just want to sleep forever because dealing with people is annoying as hell 

  10. 2010 me would literally be terrified of 2015 me and I love it 

  11. why be moody when u can shake dat booty am i right ladies 

  12. quick tip: fuck off 

  13. i wish i had dora’s parents they let that bitch go everywhere 

  14. never trust anyone who can bite an ice cream without flinching that shit’s not natural 

  15. i wish I had a pair of skinny genes 

  16. still not exactly sure what studying is 

  17. when I die, I want my grave to have free wifi so people will come visit more often 

  18. “don’t be sad” ok im better now thank u 

  19. my parents don’t realize that i am perfectly happy avoiding humanity 

  20. why are u such a little bitch 

  21. why is every girl my age 1000% prettier than me 

  22. love me back 

  23. everyone is stupid except me

  24. stu(dying) 

  25. if im weird around u that means im comfortable around u 

  26. ur a lil bitch 

  27. im always hungry 

  28. dont be a dick 

  29. i want to sleep for like 30 hours 

  30. i have too many shows to watch maybe i should drop out of school 

  31. i got 99 problems but I’m gonna take a nap and ignore them all 

  32. I’m so cute why am I not dating anyone 

  33. baby girl please don’t trust these fuckboys 

  34. wear black and be gold.

  35. you can tell a lot by listening to a girl’s favorite song 

  36. who needs april’s fools when ur life is a joke 

  37. sorry mom, i only have a virtual life

  38. sarcasm is my only defense 

  39. I think I might actually be dead

  40. i dont argue, i explain why im right 

  41. 50 shades of tired 

  42. just imagine how great life would be if pizza made u skinny 

  43. i say idk a lot but trust me i be knowing

  44. can u lose weight by running away from ur feelings 

  45. dropping out of school to become a princess

  46. apparently, when you treat people the same way they treat you they get offended 

  47. me and my mom gossip about u 

  48. 420% good vibes
português/portuguese
  1. miga não força

  2. sou meio vagabunda mas sou uma boa pessoa 

  3. prefiro morrer do que perder a vida

  4. meça suas intimidades parça

  5. sua mãe pode até te amar mas eu não

  6. miga deixa jesus fazer a obra na tua vida

  7. o twitter pergunta o que ta acontecendo eu começo chora 

  8. isso fofa come mais chocolate continua comendo vai explode logo

  9. seu cu agr é meu

  10. quero voltar pro útero da minha mãe

  11. (✿◠‿◠) minha cara de quem se importa

  12. olha só onde estou parece q o jogo mudou n é msm

  13. vc está louca querida 

  14. vai com calma viado a senhora tem um cu só

  15. olhando pro nada pensando deus me mata 

  16. toma aqui as vírgulas que eu não faço questão de usar ,,,,,,,, 

  17. vc já caga pelo cu não precisa cagar pela boca

  18. miga seje menas otaria 

  19. vc que me seguiu fofa agr aguenta

  20. meu sonho eh ser uma diva pop 

  21. vc atingiu 100% do seu limite diário de ser otaria

  22. sєjє мєησs ρυтα 

  23. a solidão me fez fã de series 

  24. 420% paz e amor

  25. lembre-se que: não sou obrigada a te seguir de volta

  26. bebendo as lagrimas das inimigas 

(◕‿◕✿) (✿◠‿◠)  *∘✧* ღ ♥ ♡ ❤ ❥ △ ∞ ☆ ★ ✖ 。®™✤ ❝❞✥ ✦ ✧ ✩ ✫ ✬ ✭ ✮ ✯ ✰ ✱ ✲ ✳ ❃ ❂ ❁ ❀ ✿ ✾ ✽ ✼ ✻ ✺ ✹ ✸ ✷ ₪ ❃ ❂ ❁ ❀ ✿ ✾ ✽ ✼ ✻ ✺ ✹ ✸ ✷ ☢ ✌ ♔ ∆ ∇ ☾ ☽ ♡  ☼  ☁ ▲ ▼ (◡‿◡✿)  ☩ ☨ ☦ ✞ ✛ ✜ ✝  ✄ † ✞ ✝ ⇦ ⇧ ⇨ ⇩ ← ↑ → ↓ ➳  ➴ ➵ ➶ ➷ ➸ ➹ ☯ ♠ Ω ♤ ♣ ♧ ♥ ♡ ♦ ♢ ➀ ➁ ➂ ➃ ➄ ➅ ➆ ➇ ➈ ➉ ➊ ➋ ➌ ➍ ➎ ➏ ➐ ➑ ➒ ➓ ⊱✿◕‿◕✿⊰ ◑△◐ ◑▽◐ ☂ 《》 ▶◀ ℃ ℉

okay here’s another story, aka the robbed robber story that i still can’t believe to this day:

okay so my mom’s husband and i were driving past a parking lot, and this couple is getting into their car. this robber runs up to the woman and snatches her purse, then jumps on his bike and starts riding off. and i’m like. oh god, we need to help this lady. then, her and her boyfriend or whatever jump in the car (it’s like a pickup truck) and they follow the robber with the bike. when they catch up, the lady fucking sticks a broom stick or tree branch or something out the window and knocks the robber onto the cement. she gets out of the car and im thinking she’s just gonna get her purse, then her bf gets out and im like ready to call the cops if these people start fighting. but she grabs her purse and her bf fucking tAKES THE ROBBER’S BIKE AND PUTS IT IN THE BACK OF THE TRUCK. then they got in and left thE ROBBER LAYING ON THE FLOOR ?????

i don’t know what to think of this story ?? like dont rob people or youll get jabbed with a stick and ur bike will be stolen