I am a professor at a beautiful university. I wear tweed jackets and carry a satchel. I spend my weekends marking papers in bed while my partner brings me imported Italian coffee and pastries on a tray. My dog is there. Everything is good.
before i start off with this i wanna say that i’m basing this off my own experiences and while i’ll try to be generic, each region in italy has a very different culture, and as much as we’d like to think there are no differences, there are…several aspects that differ between the north and the south.
here we go:
- her mom is the italian one in the family, but was born and raised in the states. her grandparents were most likely immigrants who, if voltron was set during the present time, would have probably moved out approximately post ww2
- neither pidge nor matt have learned to speak italian properly, and only know pretty basic stuff like ciao, buongiorno, buonanotte etc
- has never been to italy except for a small vacation the whole family took when she was a baby, probably to rome and they have 25 photos of them posing in front of the colosseum all around their house
- huge football fans. bc football “calcio” if you will, is the true religion in italy. they root very hard everytime the italian football team plays. it’s a huge occasion to reunite with the rest of the family (and be super loud in true italian style) all wearing the player’s jears obviously. you’re not italian if you don’t sing POPOPOPOPOPO after every goal. (and the national anthem at the beginning of every match)
- italian families are usually huge and very respectful of certain traditions™. pidge was definitely named after her grandma or some other relative. it’s pretty typical to do that. it can cause…family wars trust me i know some shit
- hand gestures. ye…we have to go there. as stereotypical as it is, it is indeed true that italian use them a lot. especially ….if we’re angry (we cuss a lot too but shh)
- always has to kiss and greet every single relative during families reunions. if she doesn’t, they’d hold a grudge against her forever
- lunches especially during festivities such as xmas, last entire days. Can’t leave the goddamn table. but no matter what her grandma will always tell her she doesn’t think she’s eaten enough
- “i didn’t know what to buy for you here take the money” - grandma (only in an envelope though, it has to look official)
- knows perfectly most of the food that are passed off as “”“italian”“” in the us are not actually italian. (this shocks hunk a little. but no worries pidge is there to explain all about the real italian cuisine)
- is able to recognize another italian from the way they act….or drive
- her parents drink coffee after every meal. or….everytime someone comes for a visit. coffee is the way. She’s always liked it (the italian coffee™) but has never quite taken the habit of drinking it in the morning, and after lunch. unlike matt. he made shiro tried it once, but it was too strong for him
- secretely knows every popular italian song™
- the team: *does some fuckshit*
pidge: no maria io esco
My first taste of Italian coffee was in a motorway service station 2 weeks ago. I didn’t have a clue what to order and ended up with an espresso, my first one ever.
“Oh no!” I thought, “how can I, a latte drinker, manage to drink this, it’s going to be so bitter!” (also bitter experience from British motorway cafes)
I downed it like I had been told to, in one go, standing at the counter. The liquid hit my throat and I couldn’t believe how smooth and rich the flavour was. Since then we have been experimenting (with help from the very friendly Italians). This is my take on Italian coffee ranging from Roma to Napoli and Firenze:
Cappuccino: only drunk in the morning (not actually tried one yet, we were straight in with un caffè)
Un Caffè: an espresso, a good start in the morning with a cornetto from a bar, downed in one shot standing at the bar and cornetto taken away.
Caffè latte: In one bar an espresso with hot milk served in a smallish glass in another bar a shot of espresso in a jug served with a glass of hot milk (tends to get the ‘oh foreigners’ eyebrow raise)
Caffè macchiato: a shot of espresso with a small amount of milk foam and a few drops of milk
Caffè freddo: Iced sweet coffee, like drinking coffee flavour ice cream, yum
Caffè lungo: one espresso with extra water
Caffè doppio: a double espresso - Ye gods!
No other weird flavour combinations are applicable.
We have seen the light and will never go back to our ignorant coffee drinking past. A proper coffee maker has been acquired and experiments continue…