amy1

Grocery List || Amy and Ian

[Grocery shopping. It was one of Ian’s least favorite things, and of course, he’d gotten stuck doing it. Sure, Amy going along would be semi-helpful, but overall, he knew he’d end up pissed off at her. With his mom’s debit card in hand, Ian peeked into the room Amy shared with his mother, letting out a groan.] You’re still not fucking ready? I fucking swear, I fucking –– Hurry up. [Ian didn’t like being so hard on Amy, or anyone for that matter, but that was just his nature, he didn’t know how else to act. Though it had only been a few minutes later, Ian’s patience was growing thin, causing his annoyance to grow.] Fucking really, Amy, hurry the fuck up. [Normally, Ian would’ve left, but because he had to purchase so many groceries, he needed Amy, and her car.]

Cemetery Drive || Amy & Justin

Under normal circumstances, Justin wouldn’t have let anyone come to the cemetery with him, but these weren’t normal circumstances.  The circumstances of Justin as of right now were he needed to get the grave and he needed someone there with him, just in case.  Amy seemed fine; she didn’t seem like she would judge him for what he was going to do, honestly.  Well, he hoped she wouldn’t.  It wasn’t like he was going to do anything extreme, but… No, it was extreme.

He pushed the thought to the back of his mind, walking out of his (now) empty dorm and locking the door behind him.  He walked out to the parking lot, scanning for Amy.  She should be here by now, considering he had given her a heads up of some structure.  He paced back and forth on the sidewalk, kicking at the loose rocks that were strewn across the concrete path.  He looked back at the trail that led back to the lake, frowning slightly as he moved his way towards it, leaning against the railing there.  She’d be able to see him from the parking lot…maybe.  He took a deep breath and grabbed the packet of cigarettes he had started to carry, taking a fag out and lighting it quickly.  He breathed in the smoke, blowing it out slowly and watching it fade into the air.  He just really needed her to hurry.

April 2000: A fun night at Shop Rite?

Under the right circumstances, that can be a great place to be. I had Steve telling me all of his problems with Amy #1. I like hearing and helping people with things, so when we talked and tried to get a perspective on it, the time went quickly.

It’s a sticky situation. It’s pretty funny, because what she’s doing with him, is exactly the same thing as I’m doing to her. Trying to remain friendly without getting too involved with her. Also, dropping those “subtle” hints like “I can’t dance” and “can we listen to music in the car?” that’s just wrong.

And they’re going to the prom tomorrow.

That’s another thing. The prom. It’s gonna be all weird for me, since I have NO ONE interested in me romantically (aside from possibly Amy #2) and this is just a reminder of that. But whatever. I’ll go into Shop Rite around 6’ish and see if Amy #2 is working. If she is, then I’ll see if she wants to go hang out or go to a movie or something when she gets off (so to speak, heh).

But, anyway, I’m gonna have big trouble trying to get up tomorrow so I’ll just stop writing now.

WB018: Fitgenes Advanced DNA Testing. An analysis of my results.


Carolyn has joined with Fitgenes to explore her own genes and shares the results in an interesting and informative discussion with Fitgenes Naturopath: Rebecca Hall. Advanced DNA Testing looks at 53 genes and gives an insight into genetic predispositions which can influence our health in a postive or negative way. The main topics covered in this analysis are Inflammation, Cell Defence, Cardiovascular Health, Fat Metabolism & Cholesterol Regulation and Vitamin D Metabolism. Knowing this information can support the focus of your nutritional, health and lifestyle interventions and the Fitgenes Practitioner is ideally placed to advise on Dietary supports as an example that can support your long term health and wellbeing. There will be a second episode in this Fitgenes series where Carolyn will learn the results of her AMY1 gene test which looks at how many amylase genes are present which impacts starch digestion and therefore Weight Management. Genetic Testing is a fascinating podcast topic and the way of the future as we understand more about the different genes in the human body, there is more research to support the genes being analysed and the testing now available to those who are proactive and motivated to go down this path.


The latest episode of the Wellness Buzz Podcast.

Amelia (as an overall) Headcanon # 3 – Sleep

Across all of her lives

3. She needs less sleep, and thus sleeps less than a human; its the Time Lord part of her. On average she needs anywhere between 4-6 hours (but if needed, can go off 2 hours) of sleep. Although anything thing after 5 hours of sleep feels like she’s sleeping in.

March 2000: Why the fuck does Eric do this shit to me?

He tells Amy#2 that I want a piece of her friend. I happened to glance over at the girl, and she’s not so bad-looking, but I didn’t say a fucking word. I heard Eric say it and I said to shut up. Eric, don’t say stupid shit like that. Just because you’re so (in?)secure about your life doesn’t mean you can go screwing with mine or anyone else’s.

I don’t even know why he did it. Is it that he’s intimidated that I can be happy without going around macking myself constantly like he does? Maybe he wants me to have a girlfriend by any means necessary? or is it that he thinks he’s doing me a favor?

Then he asks that lady to bring in a picture of her daughter so I could see it. I NEVER ASKED FOR THAT!!

I don’t want to be associated with her skanky white trash fucking daughter! He’s the whole reason Amy#1 won’t stop calling me. He gave her the impression that I wanted to go out with her when I wasn’t the least bit interested, in all actuality!

There are plenty of girls I would like to hang out with & get to know better. Amy #2, Crystal, Heidi. But none of them can hold a fucking candle to Mary.

And I’m not talking looks. Because those 3 are really hot, but I’m talking beyond looks—to content. It’s analgous to judging music by it’s sound and it’s message. Sure, I like songs with a catchy sound. I love pop-punk and ska—even if the lyrics aren’t the greatest thing in the world. But when I hear a great sounding song with inspirational lyrics, or lyrics that I can connect with, or that touch me in a certain way, I “fall in love” with it. I become mildly obsessed with it.

The same way I am with Mary. She’s a very good-looking girl that I completely connect with. And while I still like the private school chicks from work, they just don’t compare.

The big difference is I can change my music style & listen to other songs whenever I want, but it’s a lot different when dealing with people.

Dammit, my thoughts are going through my head so quickly that my wrist is hurting trying to keep up.

All in all, Eric is harmless & he’s not trying to hurt me, I’m sure of that. But I don’t know for sure why he is trying to constantly set me up and cover my back to the point of exhaustion!

Who knows

Why did Amy call me again?

This sucks. She wants to know if I can hang out on Friday. I don’t want to hang out with her. And I’m going to make that abundantly clear. Again, I’m living for me now, not for anyone else. I wont live to satisfy people anymore.

I refuse to change to be part of any scene. And I will not go places or do things or be with people if I don’t want to do it.

If my instinct says no, then so will I. I will consider, but if I don’t like the outcome, then I will not do it. And I know that I will be hurting people in the process. But I just cant do it. I refuse to compromise my happiness and comfort for the satisfaction of others.

And that is FINAL.

But anyway…

I’m hoping again. That dirty word that I swore I would try and stop doing.

But I continue. It’s my nature. I hung out w/ Mary tonight at the stupid volleyball thing.

-I think that pizza gave me food poisoning, my stomach is killing me-

I acted as myself. I didn’t hold back, but then, Courtney came. I’ve gotta say, their relationship is a tad rocky. Mary claims she’s an outcast, but she still talks about strictly looks at times. I don’t know what to think. I guess I’m a third party to her as well as with all the people I’m acquainted with.

A back-up. A spare fucking tire. But, I can’t feel resentment. It’s just that everything happened so quickly.

And I’m again, yet again, on the outside. The 3rd wheel. The odd man out.

Oh well. I refuse to fall back into a hell rut. I will live on and enjoy my life doing what I want to do. No exceptions for feelings of others.

February 2000: Amy will not stop calling me.

I could see if she wanted to talk to me every once in a while or something, but now it’s every day. I don’t get a fucking day where she doesn’t call me. I’m trying to subtly tell her that I don’t want to be with her, but she’s so damn pushy & persistent and it’s getting really annoying.

If I quit, that’s the extreme situation, but it would be an easy way to slowly let go. She’s really starting to piss me off. And it’s mostly Eric’s fault. This fucking sucks. Why do I attract these nutcases?

First Krystal, now Amy. I think I’m too damn nice. But I say fuck it. If I have to blatantly say it, then I will.
“I don’t want to go out with you.”

She won’t stop talking to me, and it’ll be more comfortable. The End.

I’m happy I got to go to Mary and Alicia’s lunches today. I would do it every day, but Smith tags along with everything I do, so I don’t know if I could do that to him. I love the fact that Mary & I share so much in common. Of course, Curt resents me because I made fun of him, but if that makes Mary & I closer, than so be it. She’s starting to confide in me, but her and Courtney are still a thing, so I don’t know what the hell to do to deal with that. Just have to hope.

I mean, he’s friends with friggin’ Donna. How can he be with a girl like Mary? She’s just so cool and we are so alike that it absolutely kills me to see time wasted with him.

Every day I like Mary more. We’re perfect for each other. We have so much shit in common. I would be so happy if she were mine. It’s a possibility. It’s a damn good possibility.

Anyway, next year is going to rule. With or without Alicia, I’m participating in activism. That’s what I’ve been waiting for. Fighting for change with a group of people. I really can’t wait.

Green hair on graduation day. With Alicia by my side, walking happily in stride. I can’t wait for that day. Bittersweet? Oh, no. I’ll be hanging out at home. No job, no car, no obligation. Just a smile while soaking in the sun and making every moment count down to me and not anyone else!

mememememe

Summer of graduation life.

Also on my agenda is court tomorrow. One of the inspirations for this book to begin with. I’ll probably go buy another shirt or pants and give my best attempt. If it doesn’t work, then at least I tried. It’ll be insurance for another couple months, then I stop payment altogether. Sweet.

It’ll all be good by graduation. But just thinking of that makes me want to make these days count. Go to the lunches more, and talk & joke w/ Mary and Alicia a LOT more. No more caring, just go out & do what you want. Live for ME.

WB018: Fitgenes Advanced DNA Testing. An analysis of my results.


Carolyn has joined with Fitgenes to explore her own genes and shares the results in an interesting and informative discussion with Fitgenes Naturopath: Rebecca Hall. Advanced DNA Testing looks at 53 genes and gives an insight into genetic predispositions which can influence our health in a postive or negative way. The main topics covered in this analysis are Inflammation, Cell Defence, Cardiovascular Health, Fat Metabolism & Cholesterol Regulation and Vitamin D Metabolism. Knowing this information can support the focus of your nutritional, health and lifestyle interventions and the Fitgenes Practitioner is ideally placed to advise on Dietary supports as an example that can support your long term health and wellbeing. There will be a second episode in this Fitgenes series where Carolyn will learn the results of her AMY1 gene test which looks at how many amylase genes are present which impacts starch digestion and therefore Weight Management. Genetic Testing is a fascinating podcast topic and the way of the future as we understand more about the different genes in the human body, there is more research to support the genes being analysed and the testing now available to those who are proactive and motivated to go down this path.


Check out this episode!