amy's story

4

this love is o u r s

I'm so much happier ๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿ˜Š now that I'm dead๐Ÿ˜ต๐Ÿ’€. Technically ๐Ÿค”missing๐Ÿ•ต. Soon to be presumed dead๐Ÿ˜ต๐Ÿ’€. Gone๐Ÿ‘‹๐Ÿป. And my lazy ๐Ÿ’ค lying ๐Ÿ˜ˆ shitting ๐Ÿ’ฉ oblivious ๐Ÿ™„husband ๐Ÿ’‘ will go to prison ๐Ÿš“ for my murder ๐Ÿ”ช๐Ÿ”ช๐Ÿ”ช. Nick Dunne took my pride and my dignity and my hope and my money๐Ÿ’ฐ. He took and took from me until I no longer existed. That's murder๐Ÿ”ช๐Ÿ”ช๐Ÿ”ช. Let the punishment fit the crime. To fake a convincing murder ๐Ÿ”ช๐Ÿ”ช๐Ÿ”ช you have to have discipline๐Ÿ’ช. You befriend a local idiot๐Ÿ’. Harvest the details ๐Ÿ‘€๐Ÿ“ of her hundrum life and cram her with stories ๐Ÿ“š about your husband's ๐Ÿ’‘ violent temper ๐Ÿ˜ก๐Ÿ˜ก๐Ÿ˜ก. Secretly create some money ๐Ÿ’ฐ troubles: credit cards ๐Ÿ’ณ, perhaps online gambling๐Ÿ’ป♠๏ธ♣๏ธ♥๏ธ♦๏ธ. With the help of the unwitting๐Ÿ‘ฑ๐Ÿป, bump upโฌ†๏ธโฌ†๏ธ your life insurance๐Ÿ’ต. Purchase getaway car๐Ÿš˜. Craigslist. Generic. Cheap. Pay cash๐Ÿ’ต. You need to package ๐ŸŽ yourself so that people will truly mourn ๐Ÿ˜ญ๐Ÿ˜ญ๐Ÿ˜ญ your loss. And America ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ loves ♥๏ธ pregnant ๐Ÿ‘ถwomen ๐Ÿšบ. As if it's so hard to spread your legs. You know what's hard? Faking a pregnancy ๐Ÿ‘ถ. First, drain your toilet๐Ÿšฝ. Invite pregnant ๐Ÿ‘ถ idiot ๐Ÿ’ into your home ๐Ÿ  and ply her with lemonade ๐Ÿ‹๐Ÿ‹๐Ÿ‹. Steal ๐Ÿค— pregnant ๐Ÿ‘ถ idiot's ๐Ÿ’ urine ๐Ÿšฝ. Voilà! ๐ŸŽ‰ A pregnany is now part of your legal medical record ๐Ÿ—ƒ. Happy Aniversary๐Ÿ’‘๐ŸŽ‰. Wait for your clueless โ” husband ๐Ÿ’‘ to start his day ๐Ÿ“†. Off he goes... ๐Ÿ‘‹๐Ÿป and the clock is ticking โฑ. Meticulously stage ๐ŸŽญ your crime scene ๐Ÿ•ต with just enough mistakes to raise the specter of doubt ๐Ÿค”. You need to bleed ๐Ÿ’‰. A lot๐Ÿ’‰๐Ÿ’‰. A lot, a lot๐Ÿ’‰๐Ÿ’‰๐Ÿ’‰๐Ÿ’‰๐Ÿ’‰. The head wound ๐Ÿค• kind of bleed ๐Ÿ’‰. A crime scene ๐Ÿ•ต kind of bleed ๐Ÿ’‰. You need to clean; poorly๐Ÿ‘Ž, like he ๐Ÿ’‘ would. Clean and bleed ๐Ÿ’‰, bleed ๐Ÿ’‰ and clean. And leave a Little something behind: a fire ๐Ÿ”ฅin July๐Ÿ“†? And because you're you๐Ÿ‘ธ๐Ÿผ, you don't ๐Ÿšซ stop there. You need a diary ๐Ÿ“’. Minimum three hundred 3๏ธโƒฃ0๏ธโƒฃ0๏ธโƒฃ entries ๐Ÿ“ on the Nick and Amy ๐Ÿ’‘ story ๐Ÿ’ญ. Start with the fairy-tale early days: those are true, and they're crucial. You want Nick and Amy to be likable๐Ÿ’–. After that, you invent. The spending๐Ÿ’ธ, the abuse๐Ÿ‘Š๐Ÿป๐Ÿ’ฅ, the fear๐Ÿ˜ฑ, the threat of violence๐Ÿ”ช. And Nick thought he was the writer๐Ÿ“... burn it๐Ÿ”ฅ, just the right amount. Make sure the cops ๐Ÿ‘ฎ will find it ๐Ÿ•ต. Finally, honor tradition with a very special treasure ๐Ÿ’Ž hunt. And if I get everything right โžก๏ธ, the world ๐ŸŒŽ๐ŸŒ๐ŸŒ will hate ๐Ÿ˜ก Nick for killing ๐Ÿ”ช๐Ÿ”ช๐Ÿ”ช his beautiful ๐Ÿ˜‡, pregnant ๐Ÿ‘ถ wife ๐Ÿ’‘. And after all the outrage ๐Ÿ˜ก๐Ÿ˜ก๐Ÿ˜ก, when I'm ready, I'll go out on the water ๐ŸŒŠ with a handful โœ‹๐Ÿป of pills ๐Ÿ’Š๐Ÿ’Š๐Ÿ’Š and a pocket full of stones. And when they find my body ๐Ÿ’†๐Ÿผ, they'll know: Nick Dunne ๐Ÿ‘ฑ๐Ÿป dumped his beloved ๐Ÿ’‘ like garbage ๐Ÿšฎ, and she floated past all the other abused, unwanted, inconvenient women ๐Ÿšบ๐Ÿšบ๐Ÿšบ. Then Nick ๐Ÿ‘ฑ๐Ÿป will die ๐Ÿ˜ต๐Ÿ’€ too. Nick ๐Ÿ‘ฑ๐Ÿป and Amy ๐Ÿ‘ธ๐Ÿผ will be gone ๐Ÿ‘‹๐Ÿป, but then we never really existed. Nick ๐Ÿ‘ฑ๐Ÿป loved a girl ๐Ÿšบ I was pretending to be. "Cool ๐Ÿ˜Ž girl ๐Ÿšบ". Men ๐Ÿšน always use that, don't they? As their defining compliment: "She's a cool ๐Ÿ˜Ž girl ๐Ÿšบ". Cool ๐Ÿ˜Ž girl ๐Ÿšบ is hot ๐Ÿ”ฅ. Cool ๐Ÿ˜Ž girl ๐Ÿšบ is game ๐ŸŽฒ๐ŸŽฎ. Cool ๐Ÿ˜Ž girl ๐Ÿšบ is fun ๐ŸŽ‰. Cool ๐Ÿ˜Ž girl ๐Ÿšบ never ๐Ÿšซ๐Ÿšซ๐Ÿšซ gets angry ๐Ÿ˜ก at her man ๐Ÿšน. She only smiles โ˜บ๏ธ in a chagrined, loving ๐Ÿ’• manner. And then presents her mouth ๐Ÿ‘„ for fucking ๐Ÿ‘‰๐Ÿ‘Œ. She likes ๐Ÿ‘ what he likes ๐Ÿ‘, so evidently he's a vinyl hipster ๐Ÿ‘จ๐Ÿ‘“ who loves โค๏ธ fetish Manga ๐Ÿ“š. If he likes girls gone wild ๐Ÿ‘™, she's a mall ๐Ÿ› babe who talks football ๐Ÿˆ and endures buffalo wings ๐Ÿ— at Hooters ๐Ÿˆ๐Ÿˆ. When I met Nick Dunne ๐Ÿ‘ฑ๐Ÿป I knew he wanted "Cool ๐Ÿ˜Ž girl ๐Ÿšบ". And for him, I'll admit: I was willing to try. I wax๐Ÿ•ฏ-stripped my pussy ๐Ÿ˜ฝ raw. I drank canned beer ๐Ÿบ watching Adam Sandler ๐Ÿ’ฉ movies ๐Ÿ“ผ. I ate cold โ„๏ธ pizza ๐Ÿ• and remained a size ๐Ÿ‘— two 2๏ธโƒฃ. I blew him ๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ‘„, semi-regularly. I lived in the moment. I was fucking game ๐ŸŽฒ๐ŸŽฎ. I can't say I didn't enjoy some of it. Nick ๐Ÿ‘ฑ๐Ÿป teased out in me things I didn't know existed. A lightness โ˜€๏ธ, a humor๐Ÿ˜‚, an ease. But I made him smarter ๐Ÿค“. Sharper. I inspired him to rise โฌ†๏ธ to my level. I forged the man ๐Ÿšน of my dreams ๐Ÿ’ญ. We were happy ๐Ÿ˜Š pretending to be other people. We were the happiest ๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿ˜Š couple ๐Ÿ‘ซ we knew. And what's the point of being together if you're not ๐Ÿšซ๐Ÿšซ๐Ÿšซ the happiest ๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿ˜Š? But Nick ๐Ÿ‘ฑ๐Ÿป got lazy ๐Ÿ’ค. He became someone I did not ๐Ÿšซ๐Ÿšซ๐Ÿšซ agree to marry ๐Ÿ‘ฐ๐Ÿผ. He actually expected me to love โค๏ธ him unconditionally. Then he dragged me, penniless ๐Ÿ’ต๐Ÿšซ, to the navel of this great country ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ and found himself a newer, younger ๐Ÿ‘ง๐Ÿผ, bouncier cool ๐Ÿ˜Ž girl ๐Ÿšบ. You think I'd let him destroy ๐Ÿ‘Ž๐Ÿ‘Ž๐Ÿ‘Ž me and end up happier ๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿ˜Š than ever? No ๐Ÿšซ๐Ÿšซ๐Ÿšซ๐Ÿšซfucking way. He doesn't โŒ get to win ๐Ÿ†. My cute โ˜บ๏ธ, charming ๐Ÿ˜‰, salt-of-the-earth Missouri guy. He needed to learn ๐Ÿ“๐Ÿ“š. Grown-ups ๐Ÿ‘ฑ๐Ÿ‘ด work ๐Ÿ’ช for things. Grown-ups ๐Ÿ‘ฑ๐Ÿ‘ด pay ๐Ÿ’ต๐Ÿ’ต๐Ÿ’ต. Grown-ups ๐Ÿ‘ฑ๐Ÿ‘ด suffer consequences ๐Ÿ˜–.
I talked to your Dad, go pick out a white dress...

It’s late in a Fall afternoon when Victor Santiago listens to his voice mailbox.

He’s been out without his phone the whole day, and is rather surprised when he sees the missed phone call appear on his screen. Rather worried as well, when he reads the sender’s name.

Jake Peralta, his only daughter’s boyfriend.

He’s never called him before, let alone left a voicemail, which startles him that he did so that day. A rush of panic starts coursing through his veins as he presses the button to listen to what the other man had to say then, afraid it’s something serious.

Afraid something might have happened to one of the two most important women of his life.

How shocked he is finally, when Jake’s recorded voice starts talking through the other end of the line, letting him know of the news -

Mr. Santiago, I’m calling you to inform you that I plan to ask your daughter to marry me, but…

He listens to the whole thing in religious silence, his heart aching a little at the thought of Amy, his Amy, his little tiger who was still just a baby not so long ago (many years ago), on the verge of getting married. In the end he can’t help but smile too, though – it’s true he didn’t think Jake would make a good boyfriend for her at first, but it seems like he is, now.

And even if he’s not perfect… the most important is that he loves her really, very much. That he could tell from the first time they met, without any doubt.

Just like he can tell his daughter does love him too, he knows that for sure – recalls desperate phone calls in the middle of the night after the detective was found out guilty, then joyful ones when he got out of jail.

(I miss him, Dad, she’d say through hurtful cries.

He’s back, Dad, she’d say through happy tears.)

“Care to share what’s making you smile so brightly?” a voice startles him out of his thoughts, and when he turns in its direction, leaving his gaze away from his phone he’s been holding in his hand the whole time after Jake stopped rambling inside, he finds his own wife staring at him with an amused, but questioning, look in her eyes.

He’s still grining when he answers her, before putting the voicemail on repeat for her to hear by herself what he means, “I think our daughter finally found the one.”

She cries of happy tears in response to the perfection of her son-in-law-to-be’s speech.

(Later, when Jake finally proposed and Amy calls her parents to let them know about the great news, excitation easily recognisable in her voice as she’s telling him that Jake and I are getting married!, he asks to have a word with him after congratulating her. All the fear he’s started feeling when his fiancée gave him the phone, not knowing what her father wants from him, is replaced by his heart simply melting out of happiness when the older man only tells him, meaning every word of it:

“Welcome to the family… son.”)

8

“But you’re also the most honest person that I’ve ever met.
And you’re strong
and smart… and funny,
and you’re confident and caring,
and you’re sexy…”

10

b99week // day seven
free day ⇢ the jake and amy (and charles) story 
  “Oh, you sweet, naive boy. I haven’t even begun to pressure you two. I’ve already written my best man speech for your wedding. Oh, I’m gonna need you to get married on a farm. A lot of my jokes rely on that.”

Oggi non so piรน bene cosa provo. Perรฒ una cosa, comunque vada, non la scorderรฒ piรน e non importa chiamarlo o non chiamarlo amore. Tu eri dappertutto, dentro e fuori di me. Tu eri in ogni mia intenzione, pulsazione, direzione. Tu fabbricavi gioia pura in uno sguardo e io dimenticavo tutto quando ti ero accanto. Tu eri il mio sorriso d'improvviso passeggiando per la strada, quando nei momenti piรน impensati mi venivi in mente. Tu cosรฌ vera da non sembrare vera eri la mia follia e la cura alla follia. Questo rimarrร , le emozioni non hanno date di scadenza sul retro. Tu sei stata, sei e sarai. Resterai sempre il mio segreto piรน bello. Riguardo al futuro oggi rispondo cosรฌ a chi ha paura e sente cuore congelato. Faโ€™ che la tua voglia di amare sia sempre piรน forte della paura di soffrire ancora. Trova un sentimento per cui โ€œvalga l'allegria e non la penaโ€. E a chi ti dice che tutto ha una fine rispondi ridendo: โ€œAndrร  tutto bene. Le cose belle finiscono? Quelle brutte non iniziano neppure
—  Massimo Bisotti (via deadinside3695)
SHOOT Reunion Panel

Sarah and Amy had lunch together a couple weeks ago - they are good friends and they have a lot in common so keeping in touch is fun.

Sarah’s favorite things about Shaw: her eating food with knives.
She also says Shaw’s foreplay would have been cutting each other and punching each other and biting.
Shaw was masculine and always equal to the boys - never portrayed otherwise. That was her most favorite part - how tough and violent.

Amy’s favorite part about Root? “I think Sarah should answer.”
Amy loved getting to flirt with and annoy Shaw, because Sarah is good at portraying the anger. “But I knew she loved me.”
“Both the characters kind of ran things - the girls in charge” - Amy on Shoot

Sarah’s fave ep was 6741!
Sarah took the role because it went to dark places you don’t get to go to on TV.
Sarah’s fave scene: end of 6741 by the carousel! It was very challenging but will always be the 1st thing she thinks of when thinking of POI
Sarah says “I only look good because Amy makes me look good.”

Amy says she liked the part (in 6741) “was when Sarah was biting me”
Amy says she loves their first meeting - the iron and all the sexual tension.
“Was this relationship always meant to happen?” Sarah: (shouting) YES! F**K YEAH!!

“How do you prepare to do a different version of the character, like in 6741?” SARAH: Acting is a lot of human psychology and we are all more than just one thing. With actors you find the closest part of you to the character; she tried to tap into herself there.
Sarah: “There were plenty of times when I was playing Shaw that I didn’t know if I was doing a good job.”
Sarah: I wasn’t supposed to emote much, but we aren’t like robots.

SS: “Kissing Amy is like biting into the most succulent peach. It’s sweet & juicy & just a little wet. It’s better than your dream, sister.”

Someone asked them to improve a scene and Amy says “Hasn’t someone here written some fanfic? … We’ll do a stage reading of anyone’s fic.”
Sarah and Amy acting out Root coming back alive.
“Root.”
“Did you miss me?”
“Is that you?”
“Are you ready for this?”
“I’ve never been more ready”
“Look behind you”
(They [fake] kiss)

Someone asked about SHOOT kinks and Amy just said “we’re gonna keep things ziptied.”

Sarah says Shaw definitely realized she loved Root back in s4; that at the beginning she didn’t have a thing for Root & took her by surprise
“In an alternate universe the two of them were together and made little SHOOT babies.” - Sarah
Sarah says in s4 the flirtations started working, like when Root picked her up on the bike & when Shaw realized she needed Root to help her
Sarah says 6,741 was a result of the fans feedback on Twitter.

Amy says that Root got her hacker skills from playing Oregon Trail.

Sarah said kissing your friend is like kissing your sister.

Amy says the weird part is the audience of the cast and crew when shooting, but she was glad Sarah was there.
Amy also said that there’s not a person she’d rather have that experience with than Sarah. (About shooting 6741)

Amy says Root made the decision in s5 she did because if she chose Shaw, there would be no world anyway.
Amy also says that being The Machine was the closest Root could get to having both.

Sarah likes doing films because you can take more chances and move at a slower pace.
Amy likes TV because you gain a family in the crew & the characters get to evolve and change. “But I guess shows can be cancelled.”

“In canon we see Shaw has a PD, and Root probably does as well, how does that change the way you approach the characters?”
Amy says that’s where you got a lot of quirks of the characters, but you just play them as truthful to what’s on the page.
Sarah says she remembers she had to look up Axis II disorders to learn how to play things accurate.

Sarah loved working w/Bear b/c the takes were different because you had to work w/what he wanted to do. “You’re not gonna out cute the dog”
Amy telling a story about how they were shooting outside and it was SO COLD they were both getting frostbite but they had to keep shooting. But then the animal handler came & had to take Bear because it was too cold for him, so she was jealous.

When asked, “Did Root have a crush on Hannah?” Amy said, “She was before your time, you don’t have to be jealous.” To Sarah.

Talking about new projects- Sarah: It’s kind of like a TV version of Inception. She goes into people’s subconscious to help them.
Sarah also did an Amazon pilot called “Halfway House” where she plays a meth addict.

Amy says she’s afraid to talk about her new project.

Sarah closes the panel by acknowledging the support of fans and is thankful because they’re why they are where they are.

Thank you to starrymag
A truly frightening Halloween Party

Okay so hereโ€™s the scenario: Jehan gives a halloween party with the theme โ€œfearโ€. Courfeyrac will pout at anyone who doesnโ€™t try enough for their costumes:

  • Bahorel overcomes his fear and goes as a lawyer, robes and all
  • Joly might just go as a plague doctor. Because the idea that medicine can be so wrong is seriously scary โ€ฆ and also itโ€™s a symbol of plague but also legit cool medical history
  • Enjolras wanted to just wear a crown, but that got a level 2 Pout from Courf.ย Enj ended up being forced to go as Louis in full costume, since his other idea of ย "a people in bondage" would be fodder for innuendo for a year
  • Jehan wears a strict, drab school uniform. No individuality. It still looks good on them though,because
  • For the price of being allowed to tailor Jehanโ€™s outfit, Montparnasse sacrificed greatly and doesnโ€™t only wear an ill-fitting suit, but a thriftstore one. Thatโ€™s worse thanย bad normal clothes. It means you tried, but you failed
  • Bossuet came as his Professor Blondeau, as a zombie (this is a very reasonable fear according to him, because no amount of eulogies or imagined deaths can make the man stop teaching)
  • ร‰ponine comes as a fifties housewife, full getup, curled hair, looks GORGEOUS, all shiny, no agency, her motherโ€™s dreamย 

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